How did I end up as a Democrat (if that's a general election map), and how on earth did I carry the South (especially if it's a GOP primary?)
Because you're freaking Batman, that's how.
Oldiesfreak-Tmth-Tmth takes Iowa, Oldies takes New Hampshire. T counters with consectutive wins in Florida and South Carolina. But in a surprise upset, Oldiesfreak pulls it out in Nevada, and then takes Maine and Minnesota, while Tmth takes Colorado and Missouri. It goes into the Summer and goes to Brokered Convention......
OR
It starts the same, but on in late March, Tmth ends Oldiesfreak's campaign with a win in Illionis. He is then chosen as VP nominee.
