Why aren't Black Lives Matter disrupting Columbus Day parades?

[Lyin' Steve]

1)  Columbus Day is more about the discovery of the continent than anything else Columbus did.  The discovery of an entire new world, one of the most significant events of the last 1000 years, is worth celebrating.  Nobody's running around celebrating the way he treated the indians.  It's day #1 of America.  Just like July 4 is about celebrating the birth of the nation and not whining about how some poor tories got lynched.
2)  This whole notion of holding historical figures to modern standards is getting really tiresome.  Soon they'll want to get rid of presidents day because Washington had slaves and Lincoln had both a public and a private position.
3)  We already celebrate the native americans on Thanksgiving.
4)  Suggesting we replace Columbus Day with some sort of minority group heritage day or celebration of a minor historical figure (usually selected to represent a particular minority group rather than magnitude of significance/accomplishment) is lame.
5)  Just stop, not everything has to be a controversy, nobody cares that much about Columbus Day.  Yet because it's such a boring, nondescript holiday, every columnist jumps to write about the "controversy" for lack of better topics, even though it's stupid.
6)  If you're gonna replace it with something, replace it with a day celebrating the moon landing.  That's an equivalently significant event and everyone can get behind it, until someone starts whining about how Buzz Aldrin was a Republican.  Too bad it's July 20, a poor date for a federal holiday, though.

It reminds me of all those people who write about how Valentine's Day is killing your self-esteem and "things to do when you're single on valentine's day" and "should we change valentine's day to be less offensive to ugly guys who can't get a girlfriend" articles that people write because they don't want to write the standard "6 ways to surprise your lover" puff pieces.  Not every holiday needs to be controversial.  Not every opinion needs to be edgy and nonconformist.  Not every column needs to be open-minded and revealing of the dark undercurrent of whatever.  Our holidays are fine.  Stop trying to pretend they're not to score clicks or edginess points.

[Lyin' Steve]

1)  Columbus Day is more about the discovery of the continent than anything else Columbus did.  The discovery of an entire new world, one of the most significant events of the last 1000 years, is worth celebrating.  Nobody's running around celebrating the way he treated the indians.  It's day #1 of America.  Just like July 4 is about celebrating the birth of the nation and not whining about how some poor tories got lynched.
2)  This whole notion of holding historical figures to modern standards is getting really tiresome.  Soon they'll want to get rid of presidents day because Washington had slaves and Lincoln had both a public and a private position.
3)  We already celebrate the native americans on Thanksgiving.
4)  Suggesting we replace Columbus Day with some sort of minority group heritage day or celebration of a minor historical figure (usually selected to represent a particular minority group rather than magnitude of significance/accomplishment) is lame.
5)  Just stop, not everything has to be a controversy, nobody cares that much about Columbus Day.  Yet because it's such a boring, nondescript holiday, every columnist jumps to write about the "controversy" for lack of better topics, even though it's stupid.
6)  If you're gonna replace it with something, replace it with a day celebrating the moon landing.  That's an equivalently significant event and everyone can get behind it, until someone starts whining about how Buzz Aldrin was a Republican.  Too bad it's July 20, a poor date for a federal holiday, though.

It reminds me of all those people who write about how Valentine's Day is killing your self-esteem and "things to do when you're single on valentine's day" and "should we change valentine's day to be less offensive to ugly guys who can't get a girlfriend" articles that people write because they don't want to write the standard "6 ways to surprise your lover" puff pieces.  Not every holiday needs to be controversial.  Not every opinion needs to be edgy and nonconformist.  Not every column needs to be open-minded and revealing of the dark undercurrent of whatever.  Our holidays are fine.  Stop trying to pretend they're not to score clicks or edginess points.

Translation: I need an excuse to not think critically about the world around me so I can feel guilt-free.

You're right, I took the time to enumerate six different points of contention because I don't like to think critically.

5)  Just stop, not everything has to be a controversy, nobody cares that much about Columbus Day.  Yet because it's such a boring, nondescript holiday, every columnist jumps to write about the "controversy" for lack of better topics, even though it's stupid.

Then why are you so mad?

I'm not mad.  Just a bit tired of everything in America having to be a phony controversy.