If only Atlas existed... v.02.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

With the old thread having ended with a high note, as well as the new year, there's a need for new one.

[Mopsus]

ca. 18th Century:

Gentlemen: In this great Age of Enlightenment, why remain euphoric from the blessing of "Providence", when one could be Enlightened by one's own intelligence..?

PS - Do any of you fellows breed ponies?

*tips tricorne*

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

1776

Lief: I, for one, want this "General Washington" traitor hung.

[Ban my account ffs!]

1776

Lief: I, for one, want this "General Washington" traitor hung.

Lief already would've fled to Canada.

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

1776

Lief: I, for one, want this "General Washington" traitor hung.

Lief already would've fled to Canada.

I imagine he'd look something like these famous Loyalists.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Lief (1858) LOL true leftists with their abolitionist fetish

Lief (1956) LOL true leftists with their "civil (lol) rights" obsession

Lief (1971) LOL true leftists defending that traitorous scumbag Ellsberg

King (2014) In case you didn't notice, Lief has been trolling you all for over two hundred years now

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

31 October 1517

Oakvale is nailing a copy of Snowstalker's Apology to the door of All Saints' Church in Wittenberg

[H. Ross Peron]

1932

WalterMitty: Supporting Hoover over the right-wing Democrat

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

2028
New Member: WTF is with all the Lief jokes?

Snowstalker (Mod): He was some guy who was banned in 2018 along with Opebo. Kind of a big government liberal. We Amash supporters aren't partial to his views.

[PJ]

2080: drj101 starts equality for space bikers movement.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

75,000,000 BC

How are you prudes rooting against Xenu?  That charisma! That style!  If the prudes get their way, Teegeeack is just going to become another Gloopahdahar. 

[CatoMinor]

1791
Maximilian Snowpierre716: To punish our "moderators", these oppressors of humanity, is clemency. To forgive Inks and the rest would be cruelty!

*ERROR: Atlas Forum temporarily shut down due to angry members storming into the Moderator Building and dismantling it brick by brick*

Inks.XVI: Has the Forum forgotten the good I have done *is taken to Guillotine along with 90% of the other mods*

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

1905:

BRTD: I had to go to a wedding at an Episcopalian church this week and it was so boring. It reminds me of why I converted out of that boring dead type of Christianity. Like all people just do is stand there and say things and no one moves during the music.
Nathan: Uh, what?
BRTD: Yeah I joined the church of this new movement. It's so awesome, people actually jump around and run around the room and sometimes fall to the floor just babbling gibberish because they're so into it. It's amazing. Hell I bet in 80 years lots of people will be doing this, even atheists. At my church we do this thing where everyone packs up near the front and starts pushing and shoving into each other. It's so great.
Nathan: Wha, WHAT?
Cathcon: Man I'm so glad that type of nonsense will never happen at Catholic churches. You heretics who refuse to join the One True Church can jump around and behave like animals fine, we don't need you. I'm glad we won't even ever throw out the Latin and switch to all sorts of different languages like all your dirty heretic churches have done.
Scott: This thing BRTD is talking about is...not exactly my thing, but I have to respect some things about them. I do appreciate how they allow women to preach the Gospel and administer ordinances for example.
Cathcon: WHAT? BURN IN HELL DIRTY HERETICS!
BRTD: Yeah that's right Scott! One of the pastors at my church is a woman actually, and she is quite hot too. I especially love it when all the cute girls start jumping around and shoving near the front too. Lately though I usually end up in the buffer zone and have to shield them.
Nathan: Huh? Buffer zone?
BRTD: Oh, the buffer zone is the people who are standing near the front between the people in the back and the people in pews and the people up at the front all jumping around and shoving into each other. Basically you don't shove yourself but do have to sometimes push people back into that little pit near the front and keep them out of the main area.
Nathan: I'm....speechless.

[Reaganfan]

Coolidgefan

I wish more girls dressed like flappers from 20 years ago.

[Oakvale]

#ReadyForMuskie

[The Dowager Mod]

1916- TexasGurl arrested for trying to vote......

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

1916- TexasGurl arrested for trying to vote......

1972 - TG sings "I Am Woman Hear Me Roar" and punches out the first guy who laughs. 

[Oakvale]

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Hahahahahahahaha

[Flake]

That was beautiful

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

*dying*

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

The best is the Mung Beans punchline right at the end.

[True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자)]

17 February 1914:

I hear the negotiations between Servs and the Turks are going well and diplomatic relations should soon be restored between them.  It looks like we can breathe a sigh of relief.  The major powers stayed out of it the second round of fighting, thus showing how foolish were those who worried that these Balkan wars would precipitate a major European war. The only major power who might want a war right now is France and they won't go to war over the Balkans of all places.  With the fighting finished, I think we don't have to worry about another war in Europe for at least another twenty-five years.  While I would hope by 1939 the efforts of Carnegie and others in the peace movement would have brought an end to war, I think that's too optimistic.  Maybe a century from now we'll have an end to war, but not in a mere quarter century.

[morgieb]

Wow. Too good.

[Chancellor Tanterterg]

On the first day, Dave purchased the domain name https://uselectionatlas.org and he saw that this was good.

On the second day, Dave made the maps and he saw that this was good.

On the third day, Dave created the electoral vote calculator and he saw that this was good.

On the fourth day, Dave created the forum and he saw that this was sometimes good.

On the fifth day, Dave created the posters of the forum and the mods of the cave and he saw that this was a possible error in judgment.

On the sixth day, Dave created Atlasia and he saw that it could have been worse.

On the seventh day, Dave created the forum community board and he saw that he had made a huge mistake.