Talk Elections

Forum Community => Forum Community => Topic started by: Keystone Phil on July 11, 2011, 03:30:06 PM



Title: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 11, 2011, 03:30:06 PM
Welcome. Please feel free to contribute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 11, 2011, 03:33:50 PM
This is quite the brilliant thread title, Philip.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 11, 2011, 03:37:01 PM
Naso, did you get word that Michael Jackson died?

Yeah Phil, your sister rolled over in bed and told me last night.

Did you spend all night crying after hearing this news?

Yes I did.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on July 11, 2011, 03:38:28 PM
Phil, I've always heard that Naso said something about believing in Jesus Christ "of Latter Day Saints."  Is this true?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 11, 2011, 04:02:55 PM
Phil, I've always heard that Naso said something about believing in Jesus Christ "of Latter Day Saints."  Is this true?

Yes.

During another discussion on Naso's religious beliefs, he claimed to be "half Catholic, half Christian."

Another time, when talking about his Christian background, I asked with which denomination he identified. I started listing Protestant denominations: "Baptist, Methodist, Episcopalian, Pentecostal..." His response: "Uh...the one with the 'E.'"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 11, 2011, 04:04:33 PM
Well, Episcopalian is certainly half Catholic, half Christian.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on July 11, 2011, 09:59:08 PM
Do not post anything illegal on this forum.  If you f**kers get Dave in trouble, you deserve to burn in hell over it.

I already live in Oklahoma, Mick.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 11, 2011, 10:26:08 PM
2021 AD:

BRTD:
This is such a glorious day.  Gay marriage has finally been legalized via court mandate and that means I can finally be with my beloved opebo........FOREVER.
opebo: Oh god no.  To think I would approve of such a harmful and backwards institution as marriage, especially with you!
BRTD: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!! NANANANOOOOOOOO!!!!!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on July 12, 2011, 08:31:22 AM
Context is king:

GPorter is not mentally handicapped AFAIK. He admitted to be dyslexic, which is just as pointless as a serial killer admitting to be kleptomaniac. If he really were (which I see no reason to assume), then probably banning him would be the best thing to do for him. Otherwise, he's simply a troll who likes to say inanities.

I am so mentally handicapped (at least using the standard set by this forum) that I demand everybody immediately start ignoring every post I've ever made because I really can't help it because of my mental defect!

I'll keep that in mind :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on July 12, 2011, 09:52:23 AM
Um, miningness is where?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 12, 2011, 11:38:24 AM
What did I say that was 'looool'-worthy?  (Is that pronounced as spelled, by the way?  Like 'drool'?)

looool means Legitimate Opinion with Obviously Objective and Ordered Logic.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 12, 2011, 11:54:46 AM
If the burgers are greasy enough you dont even need any condiments.

But that's the problem with Big Macs.  They're not greasy.  I'm not even sure they use real meat.  Nor do their cheeseburgers have cheese.  It's partially-hydrogenated cottonseed oil and the like.  McDonalds food generally tastes like cardboard.

Now, there's a vietnamese dude who runs a little burger joint in Arlington, Texas that has burgers so greasy that you can use them to wax your car.  Grilled mushrooms and onions and two slices of swiss cheese melted on the half-pound, high-fat ground beef patty.  Mmmmm.  I can't remember the name of the place, but it was next to a white supremacist bar.  That bar had "She Went Home With a n" and other country favorites on the jukebox.  They hosted dart tournaments.  Anyway, that vietnamese dude stayed open late and served excellent burgers to the drunken patrons as they exited the bar.  Those were good burgers.

You can't make up characters like angus ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 12, 2011, 12:15:39 PM

After years of BRTD pressure from the surface, the mine finally caved in.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on July 12, 2011, 01:20:18 PM
RE: Guiliani's pending announcement whether or not he'll run:

I dont know why he is running-there is no room for him.

9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11


The 10 anniversary of 9/11. My mother 9/11. My cross dress 9/11. The Yankees 9/11.  My dick 9/11.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on July 12, 2011, 01:20:51 PM
The Twilight author is a Mormon.

Well, that explains why the number of people who'd never vote a Mormon rose substantially the last decade.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on July 12, 2011, 04:47:53 PM
Nerds go to the polling place and pretend to be legally blind so that they can have the voting machine speak the ballot to them in Mandarin Chinese.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on July 12, 2011, 05:00:04 PM
Seriously guys, if you ask Cantor why he entered public service, will he answer "to help other people" while keeping a straight face?

What's your definition of "other people?"

Cantor's is "Isreal", certainly.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 12, 2011, 05:51:00 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 13, 2011, 04:47:59 AM
Turn-offs:

Too many tattoos or large ones
Piercings on face, tongue
Fishnet stockings
Platform highheels
Emo-style haircuts
Girls who talk slain
Duckface (pouty lips sticking out in photos)
()
The two fingers pointed down thing
()
Over-assertive girls

Turn-ons:

Red lipstick
Black nylon pantyhose or thigh-high stockings
Pump high heels, no open toe (example: ())
Long, wavy or "big" hair: (example: ())
Full lips
Big pretty eyes
Legs
Intelligent girls


I have to agree with his view of girls who "talk slain", as well as his appreciation for girls who have legs.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on July 13, 2011, 05:38:26 AM
In the same thread as the Naso post immediately above.

Turns ons: crack addiction, facial hair, ex-boyfriends that still hang around (good for conversation), at least three children
Turn offs: bible


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on July 13, 2011, 05:43:48 AM
Ah, but dead0man wins the thread with the 'straight face' tactic:

turn offs - enthusiasm about anything
turn ons - willingness to hang out with me


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 13, 2011, 11:05:26 AM
Damn. Joe beat me to it. This is further proof of why Naso is one of the funniest people here.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 13, 2011, 04:37:35 PM
Let's have some more political analysis from the Wisest of the Wise Soothsayers:

The GOP had better nominate Mitt Romney, or the Beehive State might be shaky for a Republican nominee. Utah has some Democrats, and those would probably be enough to defeat several of those nominees.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Holmes on July 13, 2011, 09:12:42 PM
Someone hasn't been paying attention.

Now please keep in mind, America: it's the Republican leadership that's acting childish, not the individual that stormed out of negotiations.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 13, 2011, 09:14:31 PM
Someone hasn't been paying attention.

Now please keep in mind, America: it's the Republican leadership that's acting childish, not the individual that stormed out of negotiations.

::)

Yes, someone hasn't been paying attention: you. This isn't a place for you to complain about politics.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 13, 2011, 09:41:47 PM
A special release from the Institute's archives:


And Naso on Education:

You haven't listed you know...what you're going to do about it...

JEEZ. NORTH AMERICAN MAN BOY LOVE. Listen, I am against it. It is sick. Can't guys do girls and girls do guys anymore? I have nothing against lesbians or gay guys, but come on.

 I am sick of dumb questions. AND MY TEETH ARE FINE! THEY LOOK YELLOW BECAUSE OF THE LIGHT!:::::

I don't think any of us were expecting him to say that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 13, 2011, 10:06:30 PM
The United States seven candidates participated in 13 in New Hampshire Republican presidential primary debate, first, the curtain opened the party primaries.

"Tea Party" the backbone of character, Congressman 米歇尔巴克曼 submit to participate in this televised debate shortly before the election materials for the 2012 presidential election, the first female candidate.

First Republican presidential primary debate in New Hampshire in the evening of 13 largest cities of Manchester Institute of 圣安塞尔姆 held by the television broadcast to the entire United States.

Who participate in the debate, a sharp-tongued woman, a strong sense of the lens, frequently gain applause. She was Minnesota Congressman, founder of the House of Representatives Buckman tea party groups, the first female presidential election candidates.

Buckman was born in 1956 in Waterloo, Iowa, childhood, his family moved Minnesota, Winona State University, 1978 BA, 1986 by Orel Roberts University Doctor of Laws degree, two years later by William - Mary College master's degree in tax law.

She and her husband Marcus have five children education, as the family looked after 23 foster children.

Buckman once supported the Democratic Party, the 1980s turned to the Republican Party has become ultra-conservative forces "Tea Party" an important member. Her from 2001 to 2007 served two consecutive terms on behalf of Minnesota Senator, in 2007 as the Federal House of Representatives.

U.S. media comment, Buckman energetic, charismatic, and fundraising ability, stand clear, sharp words, he strongly criticized the Democratic presidential Barack Obama, favored by conservative Republicans.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Small Business Owner of Any Repute on July 14, 2011, 09:14:43 AM
Let's have some more political analysis from the Wisest of the Wise Soothsayers:

The GOP had better nominate Mitt Romney, or the Beehive State might be shaky for a Republican nominee. Utah has some Democrats, and those would probably be enough to defeat several of those nominees.

I know the year is still young, but the Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy is proud to award pbrower with the prestigious 2011 () OVERDOSE AWARD. Congratulations, pbrower, and best luck to you next year in scoring the three-peat!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 14, 2011, 01:55:02 PM
If the economy turns out to be gay, then maybe divine intervention here can kill two birds with one stone!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on July 14, 2011, 03:04:41 PM
Call me odd, but I treat polls with a sample size of under 1000 people as little more then fun numbers.  Pbrower's map is a fairly good indicator of why.

Statistics do not work that way.

Opinion surveys of highly ideological public figures do.


This statement is literally the equivalent of doubting if the Earth is spherical.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 14, 2011, 03:13:43 PM
If the economy turns out to be gay, then maybe divine intervention here can kill two birds with one stone!

If our economy is gay, then it's a little too close to Canada's economy for my comfort.

Eh...everyone knows Canada is a bottom.  No problem.

Somebody hasn't looked at a map recently.  Hopefully Alaska would get a reach around.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on July 14, 2011, 03:15:46 PM
All I can tell you is that the head moderator of swingstateproject.com has returned to his board after negotiations with Nym90, apparently waving a piece of white paper, announcin

Christ.  I'm going to stop typing this right now.  It was starting to read like something by Kalwejt.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 14, 2011, 04:22:24 PM
Still not sure if he was being serious about this...

Keep in mind that I know the Mormon voter really well because many of my close friends are Mormons. I understand this community. Have you even met a Mormon before?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CatoMinor on July 15, 2011, 02:23:18 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=137429.msg2957112;boardseen#new

Pretty much everything from Bandit's 1st post down.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on July 15, 2011, 02:29:20 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=137429.msg2957112;boardseen#new

Pretty much everything from Bandit's 1st post down.

Sigh, was my question really that difficult to answer sort of intelligently?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 15, 2011, 09:00:56 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=137429.msg2957112;boardseen#new

Pretty much everything from Bandit's 1st post down.

Sigh, was my question really that difficult to answer sort of intelligently?

I don't know, but neither it nor his responses were humorous.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on July 16, 2011, 07:37:47 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=134306.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on July 16, 2011, 01:44:09 PM
The only difference between the two is that things are not looking up for Obama. In fact, there's a chance things will get worse. He has the luxury of the GOP running a bunch of crazies that he could beat with a 40% approval rating on election day.

No President gets reelected with a 40% approval rating. 
Prove it.

Counter-proof: Harry S. Truman. His approval ratings, not surprisingly, went north and south with the position of the UN forces in Korea in a frontal war with clear advances and setbacks, not to mention the prospect at one point of utter defeat. The last Gallup poll for him (September) showed his Presidency on the brink of defeat. Gallup quit publishing polls that month out of a concern that such polls might influence the results.

You do remember the headline of the Chicago Tribune:

DEWEY WINS

Some people were very confident that Harry Truman would lose  -- big -- having been such an abject failure. There was even a song made for the occasion:

Congratulations! Tom Dewey.
You won by a landslide today
Through thick and through thin
We knew you would win
'Cause who'd ever vote
To let Truman stay in!
Congratulations, Tom Dewey
Your republican dreams have come true!
Here's a victory roar
For President Number Thirty-Four!
The White House is waiting for you!

Election Day 1948 was an abject disaster for Republicans. Truman was gaining on the Republicans throughout the early autumn of 1948, and a bunch of Republican Congressmen elected in 1946 were defeated. The only big positive for the Republicans was that they held an open seat in Michigan with a young lawyer named Gerald Ford. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 16, 2011, 02:58:28 PM
Overwhelmingly positive.

The rest of you guys who bash joke religions are the worst sort of people on this planet.  You are everything that is wrong with this world.  I would hope for your sake that you ask forgiveness from the Flying Spaghetti Monster lest Bob Marley decides you should spend your afterlife in a 1980's crime movie.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 17, 2011, 12:14:06 PM
Kalwejt, thanks for the ludicrous comment, however, I can fight my own battles.

In this case, go get 'em, tiger.

ROAR!!!!!!!!!!  ROAR!!!!!!!!!!  ROAR!!!!!!!!!!


Congrats, Phil.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 17, 2011, 10:09:59 PM
Winfield is bumping a bunch of threads where people say, "Congrats, Phil!" to simply respond, "The Winfield legacy lives on."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on July 17, 2011, 11:43:53 PM
Just remember that you made it possible.  Congratulations, Phil!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bore on July 18, 2011, 05:20:59 AM
Just remember that you made it possible.  Congratulations, Phil!

The Winfield legacy lives on.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on July 18, 2011, 06:32:16 AM
Winfield is bumping a bunch of threads where people say, "Congrats, Phil!" to simply respond, "The Winfield legacy lives on."

What does that even mean?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on July 18, 2011, 08:13:14 AM
Winfield is bumping a bunch of threads where people say, "Congrats, Phil!" to simply respond, "The Winfield legacy lives on."

What does that even mean?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 18, 2011, 10:30:00 AM
Winfield is bumping a bunch of threads where people say, "Congrats, Phil!" to simply respond, "The Winfield legacy lives on."

What does that even mean?

He's taking credit (if you really want to call it "credit"), for a joke that has been twisted to mock him. He views it as part of his "legacy" though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 18, 2011, 10:31:36 AM
Winfield is bumping a bunch of threads where people say, "Congrats, Phil!" to simply respond, "The Winfield legacy lives on."

What does that even mean?

He's taking credit (if you really want to call it "credit"), for a joke that has been twisted to mock him. He views it as part of his "legacy" though.

Yes, being mocked is such a badge of honor, let's not poo poo it, k?  ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Meeker on July 18, 2011, 11:00:05 AM
I'm trying to remember what started the meme though - the election of Pat Toomey?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 18, 2011, 11:47:56 AM
I'm trying to remember what started the meme though - the election of Pat Toomey?

You're correct.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 18, 2011, 11:52:22 AM
Original thread: https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=127693.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 18, 2011, 12:58:26 PM
It looks like I would be on opebo's bad list!  :P

Try to soldier on somehow, good chickenhawk!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 18, 2011, 01:02:25 PM
It looks like I would be on opebo's bad list!  :P

Try to soldier on somehow, good chickenhawk!

I'm assuming opebo is referring to definition #1? (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chicken%20hawk)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 18, 2011, 01:53:50 PM
I'd like to congratulate Phil for creating this epic thread.

WAY TO GO PENNSYLVANIA!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 18, 2011, 02:26:21 PM
It looks like I would be on opebo's bad list!  :P

Try to soldier on somehow, good chickenhawk!

I'm assuming opebo is referring to definition #1? (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chicken%20hawk)

Of course!  I like to pepper my speech with Gay Slang - keeps 'em guessing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 18, 2011, 02:49:14 PM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 18, 2011, 04:40:21 PM
I'm trying to remember what started the meme though - the election of Pat Toomey?

Which leads to another great Winfield quote...

The best part was when Winfield withdraw his congratulations to Phil and adressed it directly to Toomey.

Please, please, I really must protest.  You are spreading faleshoods, you are defaming my good name, you are maligning my sterling reputation.  It was Toomey AND Corbett. 


It was Toomey and Corbett, Meeker.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 18, 2011, 10:12:57 PM
A great intellectual battle...


only a matter of time before the 'scene kids' go back to dial up...like they did vinyl.

Uh it's not like that all. Vinyl never went out of style in the scene to begin with. Lots of bands refused to press their records on CD even when it became the dominant format.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on July 18, 2011, 10:37:07 PM
A great intellectual battle...


only a matter of time before the 'scene kids' go back to dial up...like they did vinyl.

Uh it's not like that all. Vinyl never went out of style in the scene to begin with. Lots of bands refused to press their records on CD even when it became the dominant format.

I was just going to put walter's quote here. Genius.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on July 18, 2011, 10:44:12 PM
Phil, you really need to go to a show sometime, there are a ton in Philly, to see what we're all about. They don't consist of some guy in gold chains and gangsta clothes objectifying women though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on July 19, 2011, 09:34:52 AM
Phil, you really need to go to a show sometime, there are a ton in Philly, to see what we're all about. They don't consist of some guy in gold chains and gangsta clothes objectifying women though.

I thought you approved of objectifying women? I mean you're not a *gasp* prude are you? :o


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on July 19, 2011, 09:36:28 AM
The usual suspects destroying another comedy thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 19, 2011, 10:04:32 AM
The usual suspects destroying another comedy thread.

^^^^^


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 19, 2011, 01:16:41 PM
The following post belonged in the Comedy Goldmine:

This thread belongs in the Comedy Goldmine.

Your love life belongs in the Comedy Goldmine


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 19, 2011, 01:37:42 PM
The following post belonged in the Comedy Goldmine:

This thread belongs in the Comedy Goldmine.

Your love life belongs in the Comedy Goldmine

In my sig now.  Thanks, Professor!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on July 19, 2011, 02:01:29 PM
The one that isn't trolling.  Er...

The one with posts made by humans and not a spambot.  Uh...

The one that isn't closeted gay Democratic hackery.  Umm...

The one with the personality. Eh, fck it... I need awhile to figure out the difference between the two candidates.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: J. J. on July 19, 2011, 03:22:18 PM
This entire thread (yes, stated by Naso):

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=134306.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: J. J. on July 19, 2011, 03:27:25 PM
The following post belonged in the Comedy Goldmine:

This thread belongs in the Comedy Goldmine.

Your love life belongs in the Comedy Goldmine

Actually it was funnier when I was younger.  :)

Right now, I'm not dating a certain woman.  We've been not dating for six years.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 19, 2011, 04:16:36 PM
Security, please escort these men out of the Comedy Institute:

()

Why so serious, guys?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on July 19, 2011, 04:23:50 PM

Ok, come on. I made ONE post, in response to a BRTD post that was already breaching the rules. And my post wasn't even serious.

You're now up to THREE posts criticizing my ONE post. Who's killing it now?

(well, I am, by not letting it go but that's a whole other issue)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on July 19, 2011, 05:34:08 PM
The following post belonged in the Comedy Goldmine:

This thread belongs in the Comedy Goldmine.

Your love life belongs in the Comedy Goldmine

This guy is a genius.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 19, 2011, 08:52:48 PM
Roach,

please kindly good sir if you would be so bold to extinguish thyself in a roasting furnace of roaring flames over the temperatures of 800 degrees Farenheit.
Not only for the good of the forum, but for that of the human race as well?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on July 21, 2011, 03:21:17 PM
If Obama looses in 2012, there's a good chance the the GOP becomes the party of fiscal conservatism and economic populism


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on July 21, 2011, 04:05:37 PM
PBrower, you forgot to add the Michigan poll:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=138308.0

^

could be that since a republican is actually leading obama, it doesn't count for his maps :P

Those polls have usually been repudiated quickly. PPP polls Michigan next week anyway.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on July 21, 2011, 08:46:44 PM
To argue that Bachmann's surge hurt Santorum's numbers is like saying that Eminem's emergence hurt Vanilla Ice's career.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on July 22, 2011, 02:16:07 AM

Sam Spade did as well for completely different reasons.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on July 22, 2011, 08:11:08 AM
I ran his positions through the questionaire and got:

E -7.23
S 1.39




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 22, 2011, 09:01:19 AM
Note: before you say that someone is stupid, don't look stupid yourself...

The rest of the country however is done with no nothing uber religious hyper partisan types.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on July 22, 2011, 10:37:36 AM
Poll Lucifer... might as well now.

Already done on a regular basis (http://www.gallup.com/poll/113980/Gallup-Daily-Obama-Job-Approval.aspx)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 22, 2011, 02:17:26 PM
I think its wrong to attack Marcus Bachmann for being a closeted gay man married to a woman.  Its not okay to make fun of effeminate men with supposedly gay tendencies.
If he wants to live his life as a straight man, then that should be his choice.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 23, 2011, 11:42:26 AM
From the Bizarre-o Files...

Also, in a race between Matheson and Chaffetz, Matheson may end up being perceived as the most pro-Utah candidate. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 23, 2011, 08:04:54 PM
I can tell you first hand, there is a silent but angry white male vote out there


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on July 24, 2011, 03:24:46 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Torie on July 24, 2011, 03:26:39 PM
I can tell you first hand, there is a silent but angry white male vote out there

How many angry white males are silent is what I want to know? I mean, is CARL silent?  If not he, who? :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on July 24, 2011, 04:36:18 PM
I can tell you first hand, there is a silent but angry white male vote out there

How many angry white males are silent is what I want to know? I mean, is CARL silent?

When he takes his medication.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 24, 2011, 04:39:18 PM
I can tell you first hand, there is a silent but angry white male vote out there

How many angry white males are silent is what I want to know? I mean, is CARL silent?

When he takes his medication.


CARL realized a long time ago that the medication prescribed to him by his doctor was an attempt by Medicare to silence him.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ban my account ffs! on July 24, 2011, 05:09:43 PM
I can tell you first hand, there is a silent but angry white male vote out there

How many angry white males are silent is what I want to know? I mean, is CARL silent?

When he takes his medication.


CARL realized a long time ago that the medication prescribed to him by his doctor was an attempt by Medicare to silence him.
And he was exactly correct in that assessment.  Unfortunately, it is also good for him.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on July 24, 2011, 11:40:30 PM
Hi all,

I don't know about you, dazzleman, but I'm pretty tired of playing this game.

BRTD, Al: none of the other members besides the four of us actually exist.  Well, besides Dave of course but he barely counts.  I cannot honestly remember when this whole scheme actually began.  We just thought the two of you were such interesting people that it would be fun to create a whole string of posters for which you could interact.  I believe dazzle started it first with his "gay Brit self" in Peter and I later created afleitch.  It wasn't until later that we settled into our dazzleman and JSojourner personas as personal accounts, although we both now speak exclusively through our socks for obvious reasons.

It still amazes me how out of hand it has gotten. The early creations were more about conflict between our puppets, but now it's become a game of pure knockoffs with some more obvious than others.  You will find for every Coke product I made that dazzleman tried his hand at a Pepsi or vice versa.  We've both had our share of flops, too.  I suppose we made it too obvious over the past few years.  Why do you think things such as BushOK fandom and Mike Naso fandom rarely overlapped positively between the two character groups?  Socks protect each other and we fought.

Some notable examples:
(JS) = (DM)
aflietch and jmfcst (a classic old conflict attempt)
Bandit and CARLHAYDEN (more of a knockoff like the modern versions)
BushOK and Mike Naso
WalterMitty and opebo
Coburnin2012 and HoffmanJohn
pbrower and krazen
Flyers (retired and replaced with a broader, more straight man character in Lief) and Keystone Phil
Teddy and Rochambeau
Feeblepizza and GusChiggins
King and Joe Republic
Libertas and wormyguy
The Mikado and Gully Foyle
"Mr. Morden" (I was struggling for names) and Mr. Moderate
jfern and Sam Spade
TommyC1730 (flop) and GPORTER
Kalwejt and v0031
Xahar and benconstine
Gramps and Torie
Winston Disraeli and Mint
ConKiller and LBJ Revivalist
etc.
etc.
etc.

Sincerest apologies to the both of you for such a grand web of lies,

JSojourner


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 24, 2011, 11:48:53 PM
So the only real people on the forum are Al, Dazzelman, JSJ, BRTD and Dave? What about me? Why was that thread locked anyway?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 24, 2011, 11:50:31 PM
So the only real people on the forum are Al, Dazzelman, JSJ, BRTD and Dave? What about me?

Very cute, dazzle.  It's over man.

I think BRTD, Al, and Dave would agree that Obamaisdabest is better of the two BTW.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 24, 2011, 11:52:35 PM
What about that guy who needs help learning English?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on July 25, 2011, 12:00:28 AM
I am still 100% genuine.  Awesome.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on July 25, 2011, 12:07:08 AM
What about that guy who needs help learning English?

My best sock ever I'd say.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on July 25, 2011, 12:52:47 AM
I was dazzleman's attempt to make a better King. :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on July 25, 2011, 03:34:24 AM
Just because you go by the name "Smash" on the Atlas Forum, it doesn't mean you should take that to heart while on the road


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on July 25, 2011, 04:46:22 PM
Curse you, Px... I was gonna post that! :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 25, 2011, 06:30:01 PM
Context needed



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 25, 2011, 07:25:41 PM
Your nonviolent protests are admirable, Rochambeau, but I think it's time to take it up a notch.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on July 25, 2011, 08:49:06 PM
Also, I'd welcome all of my "administrative duties" being removed.  I honestly wouldn't mind, but that's mainly because I don't have any.
Please categorise your pornography collection by type, then alphabetically. Then index the collection, photocopy the index and file in 3 different places.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on July 26, 2011, 11:54:59 AM
Typos are funny.

Bernie would probably win Vermont if Obama were deemed to have more than 272 evs in the vag.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 26, 2011, 01:04:01 PM
"Broken"  Hilarious!

Well I only used the Facebook for about two weeks and it is, unsurprisingly, already broken.  It appears to be infected with viruses and I cannot see my account.  Ah, what wonderfulness is the modern technology.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 26, 2011, 01:16:28 PM
"Broken"  Hilarious!

Well I only used the Facebook for about two weeks and it is, unsurprisingly, already broken.  It appears to be infected with viruses and I cannot see my account.  Ah, what wonderfulness is the modern technology.

Yes, archaisms are a form of humor I enjoy, though I hardly think it worthy of the Institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 26, 2011, 02:23:03 PM
the context is important

Ok I did exactly as that said, Bullmoose, and of course it did no good at all.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 26, 2011, 03:42:33 PM
the context is important

Ok I did exactly as that said, Bullmoose, and of course it did no good at all.

How do you mean? In light of the previous post?  Obviously I figured out a way to get to the specified file.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 26, 2011, 03:51:46 PM
Mostly that you mistake Bacon King for bullmoose.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on July 26, 2011, 03:59:51 PM
Is it fair to call this bigblackdickgate yet?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 26, 2011, 04:05:00 PM
Mostly that you mistake Bacon King for bullmoose.

Oh I do that to both of them almost every time.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 26, 2011, 06:38:17 PM
I just care about big black dicks popping up on my computer screen...

...I'll pass on being the collateral damage from his jokes.

I'd have thought it would have broadened your horizons.  Trust me, typing "big black cock" into Google Image Search with no filters, and then clicking 'I'm feeling lucky' certainly (and instantly) broadened mine.

The safesearch filter obviously makes a huge difference.

()

Obviously.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 26, 2011, 11:27:59 PM
This is literally the most horrifying thread I've ever seen.

Could be worse.  We could get "How would the cast of Pac-Man have voted in 2008?"

Does Blinky's red color mean he's a red state Republican or a communist?  Is Pinky LGBT?


Psh, Pac-Man would've obviously voted Republican because he's a greedy bastard who wants to eat all the pellets!

This post is seriously tempting me to start a Pac-Man thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ban my account ffs! on July 27, 2011, 02:41:17 AM
so some broad is at the bar next to a farmer who has ordered a glass of champagne.  Upon inquiring, she finds out the farmer is celebrating.  She decides she's celebrating too, so she orders a glass of champagne.. afterall, one glass won't hurt.  The farmer asks the lady what she's celebrating, and she says "well.. after years of trying, I found out today that I'm finally pregnant!"

The farmer says "what a coincidence... after years of trying to raise eggs to no avail, I finally got it figured out and my hens are laying fertilized eggs!"

The lady asks "well, what'd you do differently?"

The farmer replies "oh, I used a different cock" to which the woman replies "what a coincidence!"

I know.. mediocre trashy blue collar lunch pale humor.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ban my account ffs! on July 27, 2011, 02:44:05 AM
One more for our resident Polack:

How did the Polack break his finger?

His wife hit him in the nose.

Buh dum tschhhhhh.. I'm here all night folks.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on July 27, 2011, 07:52:39 AM
Mostly that you mistake Bacon King for bullmoose.

Oh I do that to both of them almost every time.

Sigh man...sigh.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 27, 2011, 01:38:50 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 27, 2011, 01:54:01 PM
Mostly that you mistake Bacon King for bullmoose.

Oh I do that to both of them almost every time.

Sigh man...sigh.

Oh come on, you're both moderate heros with about the same political spectrum score, no?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 27, 2011, 01:57:25 PM
Mostly that you mistake Bacon King for bullmoose.

Oh I do that to both of them almost every time.

Sigh man...sigh.

Oh come on, you're both moderate heros with about the same political spectrum score, no?

Well Bacon lives in a good city, not a sh**t hole, but I can see it, opebo.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on July 27, 2011, 03:01:51 PM
Mostly that you mistake Bacon King for bullmoose.

Oh I do that to both of them almost every time.

Sigh man...sigh.

Oh come on, you're both moderate heros with about the same political spectrum score, no?

Well Bacon lives in a good city, not a sh**t hole, but I can see it, opebo.

I mean this in the nicest way possible...Up yours old man.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on July 27, 2011, 03:03:34 PM
Mostly that you mistake Bacon King for bullmoose.

Oh I do that to both of them almost every time.

Sigh man...sigh.

Oh come on, you're both moderate heros with about the same political spectrum score, no?

I wouldn't say I'm a moderate hero...not at least in the derogatory way that term is thrown about here. 

I'm sure you can find a bunch of other ways to poke fun though...so don't fret.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Torie on July 27, 2011, 03:04:35 PM
Hey Mouse, I know where you live!  :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on July 27, 2011, 03:14:54 PM
Hey Mouse, I know where you live!  :P

You know better than most.  True.  Still you'd have to find the needle in a much reduced yet still daunting haystack.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 27, 2011, 04:19:37 PM
Moose is probably right under my nose. He's definitely the Forum member that lives closest to me. He has given me hints as to where he lives and places he frequents but that's all I'll ever get.  :P

Oh, by the way, this type of discussion isn't meant for The Institute.  ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on July 27, 2011, 04:45:11 PM
Two snowmen are standing in a meadow.

One snowman turns to the other and says, "Do you smell carrots?"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 27, 2011, 05:04:07 PM
Two snowmen are standing in a meadow.

One snowman turns to the other and says, "Do you smell carrots?"

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 27, 2011, 11:01:50 PM
I, for one, support the proliferation of 60s Spiderman cartoon images into our fine forums.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on July 28, 2011, 01:37:45 AM
Another gem from King of Comedy.

When your top billed star is named Kitsch, how can you possible go wrong?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 28, 2011, 11:36:35 AM
Quote
Christie was being driven to a farm in central New Jersey

Now, that's a little cruel.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on July 28, 2011, 04:59:33 PM
On who's the forum's most intellectual poster.


This is a serious question.

As a side note, do you have any links to the stuff Gus posted?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bo on July 28, 2011, 06:42:39 PM
Hate to quote myself, but no one else posted this:

If I may chime in for a moment, I would just like to say that I support Joe Republic as he has proven himself to be one of my star pupils. When I first took him under my wing, he was wide-eyed and innocent. Now he is a force not to be truffled with.

I guess even Professors like gay porn.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bo on July 28, 2011, 08:57:17 PM
Breaking News: Chris Christie Discovered To Be A Fat; Political Career Over.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 28, 2011, 09:18:42 PM
Hate to quote myself, but no one else posted this:

If I may chime in for a moment, I would just like to say that I support Joe Republic as he has proven himself to be one of my star pupils. When I first took him under my wing, he was wide-eyed and innocent. Now he is a force not to be truffled with.

I guess even Professors like gay porn.

Because no one thought it was funny........now or then.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 28, 2011, 09:34:26 PM
Hate to quote myself, but no one else posted this:

If I may chime in for a moment, I would just like to say that I support Joe Republic as he has proven himself to be one of my star pupils. When I first took him under my wing, he was wide-eyed and innocent. Now he is a force not to be truffled with.

I guess even Professors like gay porn.

Because no one thought it was funny........now or then.

Don't feed the troll, Gramps.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 29, 2011, 02:18:49 PM
Context needed:

Ah, yes, some of my favorite Forum members in a four way battle royale.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on July 29, 2011, 02:51:20 PM
Krazey and BigSkyBoob have found their Holy Spirit.


 The other night I was thinking of this thread when these two, Juan Williams of fox news a big Obama defender telling Shepard Smith, another Obama supporter, agreeing that future generations indebtedness for their 401k’s staying solvent was the most important reason why the country must incur trillions more in debt.
  Meanwhile, a growing number of SS recipients are making big batches of margaritas, preparing their front row seats, for the price of giving up their checks to watch the Clinton progressive movement and the Obama Marxist assault on America die before their eyes. 




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 29, 2011, 06:10:51 PM
Context

Couldn't give a Barney Frank, to be honest.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on July 29, 2011, 10:00:36 PM
Well I had a conversation with an old Vietnam protest song the other day and it wouldn't stop chanting about how Obama is a Communist.  Funny how pieces of music change, isn't it?

(I hear Okie From Muskogee voted for Nader!)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 30, 2011, 01:29:12 AM
Roch, 'tis a parody thread.

Anyway, I even made a map.

(
)

This was more to drive at the point that some of the recent threads on this board have been useless crap.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on July 30, 2011, 03:12:56 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on July 30, 2011, 05:21:26 AM
This is kind of like that scene in Harry Potter when the Minister of Magic visits the Muggle Prime Minister to inform him that things are seriously awry in the wizarding world.  The PM sits there nodding his head and listening, without the faintest idea what he's talking about, and wishing he'd just go away back to his weird kingdom.



Yeah, I know.  It's my wife's fault.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 30, 2011, 08:11:02 AM
Gentlemen, your attention please! A message from our Dean:

A girl at work mentioned my hair sticking up a bit in back, and I said, "Yeah, I have a cowlick." She immediately made a face like "Oh boy" as if I were making an innuendo. She had no idea what a cowlick was. Then, as I tried to explain what it was, she seemed disinterested and a bit bewildered.

Just shows how so many younger girls take things the wrong way.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 30, 2011, 01:56:54 PM
Probably don't go to work with your hair looking like you just had sex and then start talking to girls at work about licking things?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 30, 2011, 09:21:38 PM
Please see the Bible's section on macroeconomics.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 31, 2011, 03:06:47 PM

No.  I try to pay as little attention to the junk NASA puts to indoctrinate the youth of America to push their parents to be in favor of wasting money on manned spaceflight.
Damn NASA wasting money trying to capture Pikachu!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on July 31, 2011, 09:04:56 PM
Thanks for sharing this story, Teddy. It's really too bad that you're going to be banned soon.

I believe Teddy is protected by the Americans with Disabilities Act, as this is an American server.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on July 31, 2011, 10:33:04 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 01, 2011, 10:00:48 AM
dear lord.  who is doing all of this banning?

doesnt nathan have tornadoes to track on the doppler radar or something.  :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 01, 2011, 11:17:10 AM
Look at the username of the last person:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 01, 2011, 11:19:12 AM
On our lack of female posters:

Perhaps we can remedy this by placing images of big black cocks in all of our signatures.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 01, 2011, 11:53:25 AM
On our lack of female posters:

Perhaps we can remedy this by placing images of big black cocks in all of our signatures.

Actually, I can think of about 30+ people who would love that who are not females.......


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on August 01, 2011, 11:54:57 AM
On our lack of female posters:

Perhaps we can remedy this by placing images of big black cocks in all of our signatures.

Actually, I can think of about 30+ people who would love that who are not females.......

Is that 30+ figure including you or not...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 01, 2011, 12:18:32 PM
On our lack of female posters:

Perhaps we can remedy this by placing images of big black cocks in all of our signatures.

Actually, I can think of about 30+ people who would love that who are not females.......

Is that 30+ figure including you or not...

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on August 01, 2011, 12:36:01 PM
On our lack of female posters:

Perhaps we can remedy this by placing images of big black cocks in all of our signatures.

Actually, I can think of about 30+ people who would love that who are not females.......

Is that 30+ figure including you or not...

()

Thankfully your lips aren't moving after forming the O-shape they need to do their job.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 01, 2011, 12:43:18 PM
Guys only funny posts in the insti... oh wait.  Please carry on.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 01, 2011, 01:00:18 PM
Don't worry, bros, I'm totally cool with it.

being an innuendo hurling slime ball isn't cool, even for a fat tart like you


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on August 01, 2011, 01:05:42 PM
On our lack of female posters:

Perhaps we can remedy this by placing images of big black cocks in all of our signatures.

Actually, I can think of about 30+ people who would love that who are not females.......

Is that 30+ figure including you or not...

()

Thankfully your lips aren't moving after forming the O-shape they need to do their job.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 01, 2011, 01:10:27 PM
Yeah, since it was already here I didn't want to copy it again, yelknockers.

bm owed me one......he's still far from being caught up, but we make allowances since he's slow.  ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on August 01, 2011, 01:30:40 PM
51% of Nevada Republicans think prostitution should be legal. Only 31% have a favorable opinion of Sharron Angle

Are there things she won't do?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 01, 2011, 03:36:37 PM
Also just like turning water into wine, Jesus could turn Rochambeau's entire posting history into one full of substance and valuable insight. Now that would be quite the miracle.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 01, 2011, 03:56:02 PM
Vote for it and then punt kick a puppy to vent my anger.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on August 01, 2011, 04:01:20 PM

in Texas, we save the puppies and instead push little chickens off a bridge


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Holmes on August 01, 2011, 04:52:54 PM
Honestly, I think you have to go with Santorum by default. Seriously.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 01, 2011, 06:12:05 PM
Holmes, stop posting political comments with which you disagree. I laid out an argument which wasn't comical at all. Get over your little obsession. Thank you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 01, 2011, 08:13:20 PM
It's reassuring to see that during the debt ceiling negotiations, inspiration was taken from this body's esteemed Chairman (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=17840) for the creation of the congressional 'super-committee' tasked with researching which federal spending programs should be cut.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 01, 2011, 08:25:14 PM
It's reassuring to see that during the debt ceiling negotiations, inspiration was taken from this body's esteemed Chairman (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=17840) for the creation of the congressional 'super-committee' tasked with researching which federal spending programs should be cut.

Sadly, I soon see the Teabaggers settling on Mike Naso's proposed bill: 50% across the board tax cut, paid for by repealing the Healthcare Reform Act.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Holmes on August 01, 2011, 08:29:59 PM
Holmes, stop posting political comments with which you disagree. I laid out an argument which wasn't comical at all. Get over your little obsession. Thank you.

I'm sorry that the four times I've ever posted something in the goldmine were not to your liking (once was someone typoing "ass" instead of "add", I obviously disagreed with his politics on that), or that you think Santorum are better presidential choices than Toomey or Corbett. But I'm not gonna take the bait any further, enough goldmines have been ruined by that behavior, thanks. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 01, 2011, 08:34:37 PM
Glory days.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 01, 2011, 08:42:20 PM
Glory days. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vQpW9XRiyM)

You know Mike would want it this way.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: #CriminalizeSobriety on August 01, 2011, 09:23:23 PM

Yeah, of course we elect politicians in order to let them sit down, make a few solemn speeches and take their consequent salaries. Who's the idiot who wants them to enact policies ?

You.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 01, 2011, 09:46:29 PM
or that you think Santorum are better presidential choices than Toomey or Corbett.

Actually, dumb, the poll and my answer had absolutely nothing to do with who I thought would be a "better Presidential choice;" it was a question and answer based on who was more likely to become President. Please note. Thanks.  :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 01, 2011, 09:47:43 PM
It's reassuring to see that during the debt ceiling negotiations, inspiration was taken from this body's esteemed Chairman (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=17840) for the creation of the congressional 'super-committee' tasked with researching which federal spending programs should be cut.

Will said committee only be cutting taxes for certain districts?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 02, 2011, 03:32:12 AM
One I think learned from joining this board as a teenager was that there's no correlation between who I like more and their pm score. Some of my favorite people on here I disagree with a lot  - I care more about how people conduct themselves than if they agree with me when it comes to something on the internet - this isn't a dating site (thank God).

Also this question is totally silly, since this kind of gap could occur for a +6, +8; -1 + 1; or a -6 -4... all examples would be very different, I can't think of a single a common factor would stem that from the lower econ score.

I liked the emphasized part, because it seems to imply that dating should be based on agreement about things on the internet and specifically on pm scores.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 02, 2011, 03:37:26 AM
Reported Posts: 116
Moderated Posts: 58
Infraction Points: 100

I've already been reported:

Reported Posts: 117 (+1)
Moderated Posts: 58
Infraction Points: 100

Reported Posts: 124 (+7)
Moderated Posts: 58
Infraction Points: 51 (-49!)

I guess my death points incurred within the JCrew thread must have rolled off...and my 10 death points for asking about Siberia should roll off in a week...pretty soon I'll be like a virgin forumite, but with an attitude of someone who has been gang raped.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 02, 2011, 04:13:02 AM
In the old days, if you liked to examine the buttocks of children, you became a priest in Ireland.

If you're into that sort of thing nowadays, then you become a judge in Texas.

plus ēa change, plus c'est la mźme chose  (That's French for "old pervs never die.  they just change jobs.)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 02, 2011, 07:13:52 AM
You guys may actually want to read the articles.

Quote
customers' names, addresses, phone numbers, credit card numbers, bank account numbers, and temporarily-assigned IP addresses

I assume when I make a purchase ANYWHERE on the internet this information is retained.   I really don't see what all the fuss is about.  It could place a larger record keeping burden on ISPs but other than that I don't see what the problem is.  If they began tracking and storing my browsing history then I would be upset.

Again.  Am I missing something?

But what does this have to do with protecting children from seeing tits?
Nothing. You cant stop that. Believe me. This is really about Johhny Law and Big Brother coming on in to control us even more.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 02, 2011, 11:08:28 AM
Mod: Hey everybody, check out this post from the mod board.

Non-mod: That link just gives me an error message.

Mod: I wasn't talking to you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 02, 2011, 11:43:22 AM
Classic Carl

Thing is, CARL, I support a balanced budget and even a balanced budget amendment, if were sensible.  S.J. Res. 10, the favored version of the Congressional Tea Party, with no mechanism to provide for counter-cyclical spending during economic downturns is not sensible. Not only that, but with its spending cap, and supermajority tax provisions, it doesn't really deserve to be called a balanced budget amendment as the balance budget portion is simply the sheepskin to cover the wolf inside.

No, you support more taxes, higher taxes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 02, 2011, 05:14:31 PM
Recently
Mikado: There is no list
Teddy: Uh, you told me there was, and that I was on it
Joe: BAHAHAHAHA! a list!
Gustaf: Uh, but there is a list
Mikado: Oh, I think I know what Gustaf is talking about. It's not a list, but rather, a list!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 03, 2011, 06:24:04 AM
I'm surprised nobody has put it there yet :

Gather around children because I am about to tell you the tragic tale of how the Atlas Forum Mods came to be.


Once upon a time there was a young boy at the tender age of fourteen
He was madly in love with this girl who had a penchant for caffeine

For months he agonized how to profess his undying love
Suddenly it came to him in the form of a dove

He put a note in this girls locker to meet him at three
Behind the tool-shed right near the old willow tree

At a quarter past three she finally came
It was time to tell her everything without any shame

"Why have you called me here" she said with a stammer
The young boy was in shock, like he'd been hit with a hammer

"For as long as I've known you, I have watched you from afar
Your eyes remind me of the biblical North Star"

They both stood in silence as he awaited her reply
At last she spoke but with a great big sigh

"I'll never date you because you are creepy"
These words hit home and made him very weepy

She continued on into something of a rant
It was very clear she would not recant

"You sit in class and draw gerrymanders for Vermont
I want to date someone who buys me a croissant"

The boy was crushed and his sadness turned to rage
He had enough of society in this day and age

"If you won't love me, then my affection I will retract
And instead I have no choice but to infract!"

A bloodcurdling scream filled the air
She was dead and frankly, he did not care

"You have done well" a voice said from behind
"It is better to be cold and very much unkind"

"My name is Dave Leip and I must say I like to oppress"
Join me and you can take out your frustrations in any way you wish to express"

And that is how the Atlas Forum Mod came to be
It is a very sad tale, as you can plainly see


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 03, 2011, 03:56:46 PM
Two Rodeo burgers from Burger King.

Christ A-mighty, that's awfully fattening food for a gayman.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 04, 2011, 06:13:01 AM
If you're a European Leftist reading this, I know this will offend some of you. So let me be clear:

I'm a Chauvinist. I believe in American Exceptionalism. On this, We are Better than You. At least so far.

OK...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 04, 2011, 09:09:09 AM
The new version of the "barefoot hippie clergyman with acoustic guitar playing Dylan-inspired sing-along hymns" church of yesteryear.  Why do people insist on merging in their religion and their hobbies into one thing?  This reminds me of the thread on furry Christianity from about a year back from SA.  People were (rightly) wondering what these people's obsession with anthropomorphic animals had to do with God.

()

Featuring:

Quote
Rabbi Yakob Coon

"Born an unusually intelligent raccoon cub in Brooklyn, New York, Yakob Coon was raised by a jewish human family. having always found joy in worshipping God, Yakob sought to do so for a living. He studied at the 47 1/2th street synagogue and was there lisenced and ordained. It was years later that having been forbidden to read Isaiah 53 and Psalm 22, the rabbi sought to know why. His investigation brought him to St. Fred's, where he accepted Jesus as his savior and messiah."

Quote
Abbot Ignacious Babbit

Abbot Babbit is the Abbot at St. Fred's. The abbot was, until recently, what he now describes as an "uptight ol' codger" until his own pride caused him to become the victim of a curse which turned him into a baby rabbit. Babbit is thankful for the curse, as God has turned it into a gift, changing his attitude and giving him renewed purpose. Babbit was educated in several Benedictine monasteries and was there ordained as a priest. It is through the Abbot's kind accomadation that the Fursome Foursome was able to set up a studio at St. Fred's.

Quote
Pastor Oren Otter

"Though legally named Eric Vary, Oren uses the title "Pastor Otter" to avoid confusion with his father. Though proud to be a baptist, Oren heads a non-denominational church known as the Christian Furry Fellowship. Under God's direction, Oren established this church in order to reach out to the furry community. Oren has studdied through the Moody Bible Institute and was ordained and lisenced by the Christian Furry Fellowship. Also, it is Oren who provides and operates the equipment on which the program is recorded and broadcast."

and

Quote
Brother Tibb Kadeusus

"Tibb Kadeusus is the son of a human transformee and a natural snake. While raised pagan, Tibb desperately sought to know the true God. Believing for many years that God hates snakes, Kadeusus worked desperately to try to gain God's acceptance, studying at numerous Christian academies and even being ordained at the charismatic Church of Raucus Joy. Having come to the understanding that God loved him all along regardless of his species, Brother Kadeusus now seeks to inform others who feel unloved that God loves them, too. Brother Kadeusus is the one who can be heard playing the piano at the beginning and end of each program."




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 04, 2011, 03:27:02 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139071.0

Really?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 04, 2011, 03:40:23 PM
I laughed when I saw it, only to give a serious answer instead of a heaping scoop of snark.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 04, 2011, 06:12:10 PM
they are always labeled as perpetrators of a "tax and spend agenda." I believe that as liberals, it means we should always try something new. I think that we should stop taxing by income and start taxing by amount of offspring in the sense that more offspring = more taxes.

That is without a doubt one of the most idiotic suggestions I have ever read in my entire life.



I don't know why but coming from Winfield it amused me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on August 04, 2011, 10:01:11 PM
On Obama's birthday:
It's a shame he can't eat his birthday cake until after sundown.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 04, 2011, 10:21:49 PM
I don't get it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on August 04, 2011, 11:22:48 PM

It's Ramadan.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 05, 2011, 02:07:42 AM

He might still not get it. :P

Good job by Joe there.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 07, 2011, 07:22:39 AM
We should have a committee made up of half mods and half-non mods investigate this and similar incidents and file a report for the forum.

A "Super Committee" if you will.  If the Super Committee is unable to reach a consensus, then there will be automatic spending cuts to all boards on Atlas.


We should have a committee made up of half mods and half-non mods investigate this and similar incidents and file a report for the forum.

Okay. We just did this while you were away and came to a consensus that this thread is one of the most retarded things we've seen on Atlas. We've further agreed that, given the quality of stuff posted around here, that's actually saying a lot.

Yours,

Atlas Joint Committee on this Stupid Tinypic Thing


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on August 07, 2011, 03:58:33 PM
King's current signature:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 07, 2011, 04:12:58 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 07, 2011, 10:21:24 PM
Opebo, my friend, the white polo I had isn't "white bread" in the way that you think it is.

I didn't think it was all that white bread, and not in the way you think I thought it was, girlfriend.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 08, 2011, 12:47:26 AM

He couldn't fit Mikado, Sam Spade or Nym, so the last one is up for interpretation.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on August 08, 2011, 02:04:29 AM
It has to be Nym.  I mean, it wouldn't make sense for anyone but the glorious leader to be the only one in color with clothes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 08, 2011, 02:14:41 AM
It has to be Nym.  I mean, it wouldn't make sense for anyone but the glorious leader to be the only one in color with clothes.

No way. Nym is a sweetie.
Must be Sam Spade. I think he is the leader of a concentration camp that exterminates "fags".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on August 08, 2011, 03:29:24 AM
It has to be Nym.  I mean, it wouldn't make sense for anyone but the glorious leader to be the only one in color with clothes.
Also, Nym is Finnish, and they're still proud of their military achievements as a Nazi puppet state. >:D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 08, 2011, 06:32:34 AM
King's sig is awesome. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 08, 2011, 07:27:14 AM
I object to the monocle. Eternal cup of tea is quite accurate though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 08, 2011, 09:24:34 AM
Context.

Never been of course.  I went to a Waffle House once.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 08, 2011, 11:42:11 AM
()
Some asshole is using my name on the internet :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 08, 2011, 12:39:53 PM
opebo is just unable to come up with something more clever than Goodwin's Law.

Its Godwin's law, Goobles.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 08, 2011, 12:54:34 PM
opebo is just unable to come up with something more clever than Goodwin's Law.

Its Godwin's law, Goobles.



It should go to a snap mine.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 08, 2011, 12:57:52 PM

Pay some F****** attention, I put it there first.  ::)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 08, 2011, 02:49:54 PM

Breaking News: Kalwejt post makes the Comedy Thread, is immediately upstaged by opebo.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: TheDeadFlagBlues on August 08, 2011, 03:06:12 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 08, 2011, 03:07:06 PM

officepark's response was funnier of course, but only because of who it was from.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 08, 2011, 03:13:30 PM
"Freedom Fighter" falls short to describe the man. He is a genius, his posts are the lifeblood of this forum and a treasure that should be archived for decades to come. His postings should be studied by future students of English (his amazing wit and unique use of the language), philosophy (his unique views on morals and such) and economics. It's unbelievable that anyone would ignore him and deprive themselves of that brilliance.

These results are an abomination.

Jesus Christ man, do you have his name written in glitter on your binder?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 08, 2011, 04:01:23 PM
J.J. you are on track to fail Atlas Forum Economics when report cards come out. You are also failing Girls 101. Beet, you are on track to get an A in Economics.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 08, 2011, 04:06:51 PM
J.J. you are on track to fail Atlas Forum Economics when report cards come out. You are also failing Girls 101. Beet, you are on track to get an A in Economics.

I like how he made the post from his mobile.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 08, 2011, 04:16:38 PM
It has to be Nym.  I mean, it wouldn't make sense for anyone but the glorious leader to be the only one in color with clothes.

No way. Nym is a sweetie.
Must be Sam Spade. I think he is the leader of a concentration camp that exterminates "fags".

I think it's Dave, because he's the mod's boss.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 08, 2011, 05:01:39 PM
It has to be Nym.  I mean, it wouldn't make sense for anyone but the glorious leader to be the only one in color with clothes.

No way. Nym is a sweetie.
Must be Sam Spade. I think he is the leader of a concentration camp that exterminates "fags".

I think it's Dave, because he's the mod's boss.

lol @ the idea of Dave ever reading the forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 08, 2011, 09:47:09 PM
I think he'd pick Gary Johnson. But, they are from neighboring states (Texas and New Mexico), which makes it tough to carry the north. I think a northern libertarian may be his VP choice (if he magically wins the nomination), like Rudy Giuliani.

I'd run screaming if Ron Paul won the nomination.....


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 09, 2011, 07:21:07 AM
Arguing with J. J. is like deciding you don't like the color of your house so you scream at your house to change its color instead of getting it painted. It also has about an equal chance of resulting in anything productive.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 09, 2011, 10:46:53 AM
Carry credit card debt at some ridiculously high interest rate that isn't tax deductible?  I love credit cards though, for the convenience and the cash back.  I have the payoff every month done automatically so I don't miss the deadline.

Don't forget, ability-to-pay is a privilege, and you're paying with the poors' blood. :)

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 09, 2011, 11:19:09 AM
This is extremely dark humour, but if you look at the post just above this one it sounds... weird.









As far as I'm concerned, Rest In Peace.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 09, 2011, 12:50:39 PM
Moving in the right direction, much to the consternation of reality-deniers.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 09, 2011, 01:47:07 PM

Moving in the right direction, much to the consternation of reality-deniers.

Ha ha, yes.  The depression can effect you too, counselor.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on August 09, 2011, 02:40:24 PM
Ok I made a cross-thread reference.. is it funny?


And in the spirit of the thread, cheers to the lads in Tottenham.

I too am revolting against my lack of Apple brand electronics.  Accordingly, I think I'll go burn down a Turkish dude's clothing store.

Its a step in the right direction, contrary to those unrealistic here..


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 09, 2011, 05:04:52 PM
Classic josh4bush

That is what you think. But that isn't what the trends and polling data are showing.

By the way, how are you trending, Josh?

Im doing good. I suppose that is what you are asking.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 09, 2011, 06:48:36 PM
wonder if Kerry is going to bring his 8mm camera to film his exploits, or show off his purple heart he got for getting some egg shell in his eye from eating a tuna salad sandwich

You've been watching too many episodes of M*A*S*H.  Go spend some time with your wife and tell her what you'd like to do with her hot lips.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 09, 2011, 09:26:03 PM
Not to self-promote, but I'd like to see if this brief feud qualifies.

Yeah, destroying millions of people and other living creatures in a massive flash flood

never said wrath wasnt part of God's character...just simply said God is the source of humor, which is why the humor within the bible comes from God, not Satan.

----

then effectively forcing Noah to screw his relatives in order to repopulate the Earth is just hilarious.


i think you misread something there

There were about 8 people and 2 of each animal species. Not inbreeding is mathematically impossible, and especially low populations would have massive birth defects and infant mortality rates.

Oh yeah, and it was kind of a joke. Almost as funny as the one where God told Abraham to kill his son, then just said that he was trolling him to see how faithful he was.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 09, 2011, 11:31:20 PM
Arguing with jmfcst is not particularly funny, no.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on August 09, 2011, 11:40:11 PM
Arguing with jmfcst is not particularly funny, no.

speaking of jmfcst:  he posts a lot of funny stuff, but it rarely makes it into this thread...why is that?  I know you think he is funny, so why cant yall give that dude some of the credit he deserves?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 10, 2011, 12:20:49 AM
Arguing with jmfcst is not particularly funny, no.

speaking of jmfcst:  he posts a lot of funny stuff, but it rarely makes it into this thread...why is that?  I know you think he is funny, so why cant yall give that dude some of the credit he deserves?

I don't make the comedy rules, but a good portion of your posts should be rocking the oh snap sulfur mine. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on August 10, 2011, 12:31:09 AM
Arguing with jmfcst is not particularly funny, no.

speaking of jmfcst:  he posts a lot of funny stuff, but it rarely makes it into this thread...why is that?  I know you think he is funny, so why cant yall give that dude some of the credit he deserves?

I don't make the comedy rules, but a good portion of your posts should be rocking the oh snap sulfur mine. 

but what about..

()

you didnt think KeepTheChange was a brillant punchline?  I mean, how low can you go to have your last 3 friends be: an archenemy, a new pain-in-the-arse, and a abandoned sock from two years ago?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 10, 2011, 01:27:33 AM
Arguing with jmfcst is not particularly funny, no.

speaking of jmfcst:  he posts a lot of funny stuff, but it rarely makes it into this thread...why is that?  I know you think he is funny, so why cant yall give that dude some of the credit he deserves?

I don't make the comedy rules, but a good portion of your posts should be rocking the oh snap sulfur mine. 

but what about..

()

you didnt think KeepTheChange was a brillant punchline?  I mean, how low can you go to have your last 3 friends be: an archenemy, a new pain-in-the-arse, and a abandoned sock from two years ago?

Is there a shortage of meds at your area?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 11, 2011, 10:49:09 AM
Wait, I thought you did this to them -

()

Or am I in error, sir?

No that's Christians in general.  For the Missionaires we need to provide the natives with large pots and ready flammables, and allow them to boil them for themselves.  To just set the lions loose could be dangerous to our heathen friends, and deprive them of both a jolly festivity and much needed nourishment.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 11, 2011, 12:14:15 PM
I found the above quoted Jmf post very funny.

There is a dangerous trend of people quoting themselves into the goldmine though. Stop it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 11, 2011, 12:15:46 PM
Anyway, there are issues with JJ but he isn't anywhere as ridiculously insane as opebo. Anyone who knows anything about the issues they post on could tell that.

Kiss my Keynesian Endpoint, Gussy.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on August 11, 2011, 12:57:01 PM
I found the above quoted Jmf post very funny.

There is a dangerous trend of people quoting themselves into the goldmine though. Stop it.

straying out of your jurisdiction and attempting to encroach on another mod's turf, eh?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 11, 2011, 01:31:31 PM
Classic MAN Jr.

...Instead of British people sipping tea and being friendly...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 11, 2011, 02:32:08 PM
Classic MAN Jr.

...Instead of British people sipping tea and being friendly...

Why doesn't he have his own talk show? It would definitely be the highest rated.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 11, 2011, 02:32:46 PM
Classic MAN Jr.

...Instead of British people sipping tea and being friendly...

Why doesn't he have his own talk show? It would definitely be the highest rated.

The Comedy Network is all booked.  ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 11, 2011, 05:44:22 PM
What do you think should be the campaign theme songs for the 2012 candidates?

In all seriousness, I think President Obama should use "Rose Garden" by Lynne Anderson.

The lyrics are perfect

I beg your pardon,
I never promised you a rose garden.
Along with the sunshine,
There's gotta be a little rain sometimes.
When you take, you gotta give, so live and let live,
Or let go.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdSnwufjKtc

Plus using "rose garden" can second to the White House Rose Garden.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 11, 2011, 08:38:13 PM
I found the above quoted Jmf post very funny.

There is a dangerous trend of people quoting themselves into the goldmine though. Stop it.

straying out of your jurisdiction and attempting to encroach on another mod's turf, eh?

What you perceive as different moderators are really all part of the same entity known as the Local Internet Surveillance Team. The different personalities of moderators have merely been constructed to make the whole seem more human and accessible.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 11, 2011, 08:39:27 PM
Eh, this did not actually happen. It was a hoax perpetrated by Swedish comedians.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Torie on August 12, 2011, 10:05:35 AM
DeMint has a picture of Joe McCarthy on his office wall.

And on his bedroom ceiling.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on August 13, 2011, 03:49:20 AM
Not trusting a polling company that's only an X away from marxist!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 13, 2011, 07:39:03 AM
I didn't mean to add Gingrich.  Oops.

Your fingers slipped, and accidentally typed "Newt Gingrich"?


Not too uncommon.  Hit your keyboard randomly a few times and see for yourself...

avjjerj;dfbk dk vvlkzx clkgrobj;ibfljvjndfjerajajdgnNewt Gingricherieihp8hgpuhrhvhyiefopuifu90vpiuhrpbifbiiubifbihiiubl fb;o;narlrib;orv;ovnlibbfNewtj;ererafnfGingrichwefejngrrgi;rggrjfrjxcxzcjkzxcvm,cxvlmcsvmscxczmxzcjlxdvilgliijgiinadinnkndfpgejlnreaebgerajifgeriragMatt LeBlancgdhqke fdjnlkjnadajdkljaegjw  dfjklafjnalkjq


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 13, 2011, 12:19:56 PM

2)If the Supreme Court does review the constitutionality of the mandate, how will they rule?


I think it will be a 4-4-1 split, all conservatives objecting on the basis of the Commerce Clause, with Anthony Kennedy being the deciding vote.

What I want to know is what would happen if Kagan recuses herself and there is a 4-4 deadlock?

There's no reason for her to recuse herself.

I think she was somehow involved with the process, but I don't know what role that was.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CatoMinor on August 13, 2011, 10:22:14 PM
USA: You have two cows, because that's all you can really afford and organic food is a 'big money making opportunity' (or so you've heard). You try to sell their unpasteurized milk locally to yuppies and well meaning granola-crunching college students. The FDA raids you for not being sanitary, while the factory farm getting tax payer money a few miles away recalls millions of tainted eggs the inspectors ignored. You try to go 'legit' but go bankrupt from the new fees, ordinances and federal regulations you do decide to comply with, while people 'too big to fail' are again given 'emergency loans' (with your tax money). Everyone tells you that you should feel great to live in the freest country in the world, while you're living out of your car.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: specific_name on August 13, 2011, 10:29:50 PM
I found the above quoted Jmf post very funny.

There is a dangerous trend of people quoting themselves into the goldmine though. Stop it.

That should be the only bannable offense. Laughing at one's own jokes is most- uncouth.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 14, 2011, 06:19:33 PM
It's only a quiz, you know. No need to get outraged about everything.

Never say that to a Times Crossword enthusiast.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on August 15, 2011, 06:00:53 PM
I don't think Bachmann is so establishment that she is poison to Paul voters.  She certainly doesn't have the creepy Bilderberg, CFR, Fed and wall street cabal connections that the other candidates do.

Ohhhh, my friend. I fear you are mistaken. They never would have let her get so far if she wasn't their puppet. Bank it. Then burn the bank to the ground cause you've got all your bitcoins saved in tin cans buried in the back yard next to your fallout shelter.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 15, 2011, 07:58:32 PM

What makes this even funnier is that it is brown and frothy!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 15, 2011, 08:14:35 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 15, 2011, 08:27:15 PM

Perfect


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on August 15, 2011, 08:45:42 PM
Context needed.  From same thread as the above :)



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 15, 2011, 08:54:54 PM
You dems keep thinking it will be 2008 with some economic hardships. It won't. It's going to be completely different.

The edge almost always goes for the challenger. This was true for Kerry, Dole, McCain, ect.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 15, 2011, 09:00:27 PM
Single women: scourge of mankind!

If single women didn't vote, Bob Dole would have been elected President. Hell, one can even speculate that if single women didn't turnout, John McCain would be President. You really think single women are gonna "stick with the President" with unemployment at 9% or higher?

Rick Perry might earn my primary vote if it means more Naso posts.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 15, 2011, 09:35:35 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 15, 2011, 10:40:18 PM
He... hit on Obama a little, so, being a democrat, he'll attract a few disaffected liberals.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 15, 2011, 10:53:56 PM

?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 15, 2011, 11:12:19 PM

At least Naso doesn't query why his self-parodic posts end up in this thread.  But then perhaps that's why it's named in his honor.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Reaganfan on August 16, 2011, 01:23:28 AM

At least Naso doesn't query why his self-parodic posts end up in this thread.  But then perhaps that's why it's named in his honor.

That isn't my name...my name is Virgil.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 16, 2011, 01:28:46 AM

At least Naso doesn't query why his self-parodic posts end up in this thread.  But then perhaps that's why it's named in his honor.

That isn't my name...my name is Virgil.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on August 16, 2011, 03:46:17 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WMnI6kGXOQ

Yeah yeah, but what will Obama do?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 16, 2011, 08:08:48 AM

Texas's growth has come from the rich growing richer. Like any bubble, just below the surface Texas consistently remains a terrible state if you aren't rich and white. 9th largest income inequality gap in the nation, chronic corruption (up to and including Perry himself), and a heap of skeletons in the closet.


It's amusing to see liberals spout that class warfare statement given Obama's own record on 'income inequality' as you put it.

Which is atrocious. Right.

Unfortunately, for leftists, American politics is increasingly a game of less-bad options.

It doesn't have to be though. Progressives really need to create their own Tea Party movement to take control of the ideology of the Democratic Party.

Some of us have been trying (and it's been working in some states, mainly in New England), but it's incredibly hard to do on a national level because the right has controlled the dialogue for a few decades now (not implying anything sinister about the right (pun intended), but that's just the way its' been).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 16, 2011, 10:37:45 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139594.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 16, 2011, 02:12:08 PM
And Gustaf proves once again why he should be banned from any comedy threads.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on August 16, 2011, 03:28:40 PM
Context is needed

ok, we will increase his naptime....anything else?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 16, 2011, 05:37:52 PM
And Gustaf proves once again why he should be banned from any comedy threads.

That you can't understand anything beyond big boobs and hack articles doesn't really reflect badly on me, I'm afraid.

I suspect you didn't get why I found that post funny, which goes to prove that you should probably stick with the hot girls thread. It seems to be the only thread your intellect can grapple with.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 16, 2011, 06:10:07 PM
And Gustaf proves once again why he should be banned from any comedy threads.

That you can't understand anything beyond big boobs and hack articles doesn't really reflect badly on me, I'm afraid.

I suspect you didn't get why I found that post funny, which goes to prove that you should probably stick with the hot girls thread. It seems to be the only thread your intellect can grapple with.

Really, there wasn't any need to prove my point again.

(I stop here before Lief and Kal take me to the task)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 16, 2011, 06:38:03 PM
And Gustaf proves once again why he should be banned from any comedy threads.

That you can't understand anything beyond big boobs and hack articles doesn't really reflect badly on me, I'm afraid.

I suspect you didn't get why I found that post funny, which goes to prove that you should probably stick with the hot girls thread. It seems to be the only thread your intellect can grapple with.

Really, there wasn't any need to prove my point again.

(I stop here before Lief and Kal take me to the task)

There is a simple rule of not arguing in the goldmine. So cut it out.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 16, 2011, 06:42:57 PM
This Goldmine barely survived the terror of Rochambeau. Don't kill it now :'(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 16, 2011, 07:18:13 PM
This is not simply a goldmine.  This is a state of the art institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 16, 2011, 07:41:18 PM
It's also getting rather meta.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 16, 2011, 09:44:21 PM
The next time someone refers to this hallowed institution as a "goldmine," they will be expelled.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: KEmperor on August 16, 2011, 09:59:28 PM
The next time someone refers to this hallowed institution as a "goldmine," they will be expelled.

Wait, so what's your problem with this goldmine?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 16, 2011, 10:52:58 PM
The media will be jumping at anything and everything. I recall how many times George W. Bush made "epic" comments that "doomed" his 2000 campaign.

When asked who Bush considered was the world's greatest philosopher, he answered:  "Jesus Christ. He changed my life." They jumped all over that.

Now it's really lame. Perry says there is a black cloud hanging over America, they say it's racist. When he say's America needs a President who loves it, they want to see if Perry is "implying" anything. Liberal cowards always do that. I remember in High School when a bully kept messing with me, and I said, "Watch yourself, sometimes things don't turn out so good" and he went to the principal. They asked if I threatened or tried to fight him and I said, "No" and they responded, "but did you imply it?" I laughed in their face. They clearly were not pleased.

How old are you?

I turn 23 years old in October, why?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on August 17, 2011, 12:59:21 AM
All I know is that when I look at Pat Toomey, I immediately think 'ethnic minority'.

When I went to school in PA-15 we all used to call him White Chocolate.* 


He might not have a soul...but he got soul.**

*No we didn't.

**No he doesn't.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 17, 2011, 01:24:41 AM
Old, because it's the more progressive option.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Foucaulf on August 17, 2011, 02:47:38 AM
Double feature:
Well it's not as if the Middle East is full of stable minded leaders.

None of the Iranian Leadership's actions indicate that they are suicidal. Iran would get glassed if it nuked Israel, and they know it.
But do they care?  I don't think so.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on August 17, 2011, 08:26:23 AM
as long as 75% of AA children are born out of wedlock, you can forget about the future of AA youth

Will AA children then be downgraded to AA- Children? Or just Single A??


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 17, 2011, 08:40:32 AM
And a newcomer gets in!

Hello, all. I'm a lurker, but the relentless jet stream of bullsh**t emanating from Ohio has compelled me to register.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 17, 2011, 10:17:00 AM
If buddy roemers campaign gets off the ground where do you see him dropping out


If I started pissing crude oil, how much would it be worth?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 17, 2011, 10:53:01 AM

"House parties" are often held, where Generation X-ers sit back drinking beer wishing they can relive the glory of the voguish, contemporary dissimulation of the Clinton/Gore era.

()



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 17, 2011, 10:55:00 AM
Imagine a slice of life TV series written by Naso.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 17, 2011, 11:21:27 AM
And a newcomer gets in!

Hello, all. I'm a lurker, but the relentless jet stream of bullsh**t emanating from Ohio has compelled me to register.


Already in my sig........for a newcomer, awesome!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on August 17, 2011, 11:38:20 AM

"House parties" are often held, where Generation X-ers sit back drinking beer wishing they can relive the glory of the voguish, contemporary dissimulation of the Clinton/Gore era.

()


Now, don't get me wrong, I like Naso...but his brain doesnt function like anyone I've ever met....his posts would make excellent joke material...but, alas, he isn't joking.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 17, 2011, 02:41:50 PM
When it comes to the Republican nomination, Christie seems to be the elephant in the room.
He has gravitas, his entrance will make a big splash and will possibly squeeze out some other candidates.

All things said, he sure has a hefty resume and it's pretty obvious why many Republicans see him as the 800-pound gorilla of the presidential field..



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 17, 2011, 03:37:08 PM

That's why he's hilarious.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Iosif on August 17, 2011, 07:15:48 PM
Christie really is one of the Republicans' best choices here. He has the right kind of temperment, and frankly, he'd fill a void -- Republicans have no candidate they can get excited about who is actually electable.

The only question -- experience. Will the public be okay electing someone with only three years' experience in the executive? Will his time as U.S. Attorney count as "experience?"


True, if only Christie has a few years as a community organizer of something under his belt I would feel much better about his candidacy.

Well, at least he overcompensates with what's over his belt.

hehehe


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 17, 2011, 08:03:51 PM
Imagine a slice of life TV series written by Naso.

Is it wrong that I'm picturing the thalidomide baby of Arrested Development and Azumanga Daioh as raised by late-period Li'l Abner?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 17, 2011, 08:04:37 PM
Imagine a slice of life TV series written by Naso.

Is it wrong that I'm picturing the thalidomide baby of Arrested Development and Azumanga Daioh as raised by late-period Li'l Abner?

It's only wrong in the sense that what the hell are you talking about


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 17, 2011, 08:35:11 PM
Imagine a slice of life TV series written by Naso.

Is it wrong that I'm picturing the thalidomide baby of Arrested Development and Azumanga Daioh as raised by late-period Li'l Abner?

It's only wrong in the sense that what the hell are you talking about

In order, what I'm imagining is something (a) tragically stunted, (b) vaguely perverse, (c) indiscriminate and plotless, and (d) dolefully reactionary.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 17, 2011, 08:37:05 PM
...

Security, please remove these unfunny patrons from our fair institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 17, 2011, 09:28:47 PM
It's fairly common in the black community.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 18, 2011, 12:25:03 AM
He emerges out of the darkness, as a beacon of hope and relationship advice!

Obama's trough pales in comprison to J.J.'s romantic trough which has lasted 49 years.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 18, 2011, 08:56:02 AM
The MAN is back. So much good is going to come from everything in this thread.

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139760.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 18, 2011, 09:19:17 AM
The MAN is back. So much good is going to come from everything in this thread.

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139760.0

I'm literally on the edge of my seat awaiting Part II....... 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 18, 2011, 10:40:47 AM
The MAN is back. So much good is going to come from everything in this thread.

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139760.0

He has to be messing with us at this point.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 18, 2011, 10:45:06 AM
He has to be messing with us at this point.

If it would have been a paragraph or two I'd agree, but a post that long has to be real, which validates Phil naming the Institute after him. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: homelycooking on August 18, 2011, 10:54:22 AM
In order, what I'm imagining is something (a) tragically stunted, (b) vaguely perverse, (c) indiscriminate and plotless, and (d) dolefully reactionary.

It sounds like you just wrote a question for the SAT.

Quote
Which of the following best describes Nathan's somewhat ostentatious use of advanced vocabulary?

a. tragically stunted
b. vaguely perverse
c. indiscriminate and plotless
d. dolefully reactionary


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 18, 2011, 03:28:59 PM
In order, what I'm imagining is something (a) tragically stunted, (b) vaguely perverse, (c) indiscriminate and plotless, and (d) dolefully reactionary.

It sounds like you just wrote a question for the SAT.

Quote
Which of the following best describes Nathan's somewhat ostentatious use of advanced vocabulary?

a. tragically stunted
b. vaguely perverse
c. indiscriminate and plotless
d. dolefully reactionary


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 18, 2011, 04:18:41 PM
My next brush with an educator with whom I ended up losing respect was in 3rd grade, in late 1997. She was married with children, in her late 20s/early 30s, and was trying to help me understand a math problem. I am not good in mathematics by any means, in fact, it is my worse subject. I couldn't grasp the math problem, and she responded by saying, "Ughh...you make me wanna pull my hair out!" I was shocked by this. A teacher saying something like that to a 9 year old kid trying to understand a math problem? It gave me the impression that "educators" might not be all they're cracked up to be.

By 1998, I had other priorities that didn't match well with kids my age, but nonetheless had friends in school and a couple that I hung out with outside of school. By 1999 my modern interests in weather and politics had grown on me and I was beginning to follow more current events day by day. I became a class clown, and one day my "art" teacher didn't take kindly to that and had the principal escort me to the office. As the principal came to get me, he had a "tough" look on his face, but for this liberal puppy dog, it was about as scary as making a funny face at the camera. Nonetheless, I complied. We walked down the hallways to the office and were in lock-step, walking almost in cadence right next to each other. He said, "Please don't walk behind me." I had noticed the perfect in step cadence we had, and at the age of 11 said calmly, "Oh, I wasn't walking behind you." He looked at me and said, "I can't believe you just said that! That's the rudest thing I ever heard! What you should have said was, YES SIR, I APOLOGIZE FOR WALKING BEHIND YOU!" My days of tears and crying due to yelling were over, and I now felt rage and anger. Once in the office the "counselor" came in, and he told her what happened. He said, "I asked politely not to walk behind me, and he said, "I'm not walkin' behind YOU!" He completely and blatantly lied and made it sound as if I had screamed at him. I scowled and blasted off, "Mr. (PRINCIPAL), you KNOW that's a lie!!" He seemed stunned. After all, I was 11 years old! I had enough and told him to quit telling lies and exaggerations and making things seem worse than they are.

The next day in School, I was sent from class right to the principal's office. He told me that for precautionary reasons, he had to check my book-bag for weapons!!! I was stunned! Why would I ever break the law or threaten people? What had I ever done? So he put his hand in my book-bag and patted it down. It's probably the most action he has seen before or since. Of course, this was likely fueled by the fact that my father was a Police Officer and Columbine had just occurred. Nevertheless, I was insulted and enraged that a merit roll student who happened to be a class clown would be treated this way while the kids who skip school don't get so much as a slap on the wrist. This further intensified my dislike for our education system.

As this was occurring, the 2000 election was going on and clearly my teachers were supporting Al Gore, some of them vocally, others you just knew. This was in contrast to my one teacher who, despite being liberal, was adamantly pro-life and told me she voted for George Bush. By now, the issues made sense. Bush's "I want to let people keep the money they earn" made more sense than speaking of "brackets" and "lock-boxes". At least it did to me.

My teachers had an interesting view of me. On the one had, they always told me they thought I was more mature than people my age and very intelligent, but on the other hand I confronted their teaching tactics often while using political justification and that was not something they were used to, especially not from an 11 or 12 year old kid. Another incident happened in early 2001 when my friend and I were messing around by our lockers one Friday afternoon. The teacher saw this and thought we were really fighting. We tried to explain but weren't given a chance. We ended up in the office and the vice principal made us shake hands. We were trying to hold back our laughter. We were friends, not enemies...but the teachers thought we should use diplomacy to "ease the tensions". Their notion that there were no "bad boys" got under my skin.

()

Indeed, by Freshman year of High School in 2004, there were bullies who picked on me. Despite repeated attempts to go all the way to the principal's office, nothing was ever done. I was even told once that I was the one they were tired of due to my constant inquiries into trying to make the bullying stop.  One time a teacher tried to sound tough. "Okay Mike...I've had enough of these assholes!" His idea was for me to wear a wire connected to a tape recorder to try and "catch the bullying in the act". My father came in and scalded the teacher for such a stupid idea. When I was confronted with violence, I responded, and I got in trouble as well. Indeed, this solidified the idea that there wasn't good and bad or right and wrong but no matter who started it, it was both our faults. I was dumbfounded as to why this was. Were "educators" cowards? Or did they sympathize but were afraid to take action due to the fears of legality? Indeed, I felt as though I was in George Orwell's 1984 every time I walked into school. Cameras everywhere, locked doors, security guards whom I could probably even take, it seemed almost surreal. What happened to the good old days? Schools were becoming almost like prisons.

I left public school in June 2004 following my Freshman year, and graduated high school via a charter school. Indeed, I was fed up with so-called educators. I later came to realize that liberalism catered to everything that had angered me as a kid. Anti-religion, the "no bad boy" notion, the fear in the post-Columbine world. All of this made me Palin-esque to where when I hear someone is a teacher, I sometimes find myself rolling my eyes as well...

To be continued.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 18, 2011, 04:54:13 PM
I was a trouble maker too, and could get angry, but I think class made a difference. I was clearly an upper middle class kid from "south of the boulevard," who was not afraid to make clear I would not be pushed around, so I was given a long leash. I was also not physical in the way Naso was. My dad wrote me 30 absence excuses at once, because I told him my first period biology teacher was a hopeless dumb and a joke, who could not even get the baby talk text book we used right. Thus I chose to sleep in. I got an ASS in that class, rather than an AEE, for non-attendance. :P  In any event, the teachers in general were not that political, some conservative, and almost all betas, particularly the men. But as opebo keeps reminding me, class does matter.

Great story Naso. I am quite enjoying it.

I was only violent when I stood up for myself after a physical assault.

It's very easy for those who are critical to attack me, demon me, and mock me and think I'm a joke. That's fine. But what I'm trying to get across is that from the youngest age, everything about liberalism, feminism, or the things that catered to them whether in our education system, through pop culture or otherwise, turned me off well before I even knew what liberalism or feminism was. This should be a clue that perhaps political ideology stems from a young age.

Of course, I was fronted the question about the Patriot Act vs. school security. Of course we needed to alter the way the law was after 2001 to help increase security, but to treat our own schoolchildren as if they're the enemy, then refusing to treat any child differently than the child at fault is absurd.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 18, 2011, 08:40:47 PM
Sorry, jmfcst, but you can't escape this at a Denny's.  Who do you think is going to be waiting your table (Naso) or be on a first date in the next booth (Bushie)?

I'd like to see peoples' expressions as they soak in their first glance at Naso as their waiter..."Hello, my name is Mike, I'll be your waiter this evening..." ;)

jmfcst: "Hi, Mike.  I'll have the panca-"

Naso: "Pancakes remind of an influential moment in my life, circa 1998.  I was eating at a local IHOP with my mom, who was still sporting a wonderful big 80s hair despite the year, and ordered a medium stack with chocolate chips.  I was going through a bit of a chubby phase, much like the character Rudy in later seasons of The Cosby Show.  The waitress, an obvious health nut leftist, looked at me rather odd when I placed this order.   When our food arrived, she returned--not with my medium stack of chocolate chip pancakes--but with a short stack of blueberry.  Ever since that particular incident, I have had no respect for the IHOP chain nor liberal diet policies such as the food pyramid."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 19, 2011, 07:56:42 AM
So, is this basically a thread where you can cherry-pick similarities while concurrently dismissing differences? You can do all that with ANY YEAR and/or time period.

yes, the thread is exactly as you described it, but different.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 19, 2011, 06:02:09 PM
Delaware hanging red while MA, CA and NY go blue is curious JJ. By the way, the term "realignment" means something with some staying power. Do you remember the 1984 map?  Was that a "realigning" election?  The term "realignment" is overused, and each time it is used, it should be taxed really. I hereby declare it an act in interstate commerce.

There is whole thread on the possibility of a realignment which was started in January 2008.

As I said, "Obama, Worse Case Scenario." It is basically the very left wing states and the home states of Obama and Biden.

Like I said, if we see this map, you are looking at a re-alignment.

1980 was the re-aligning election as I define it.  V. O. Key called the "critical elections" and probably would have defined 1984 as that election.  He did regard 1936 as the "critical election."

I regard it as being a lot more gradual, taking place over 8 years.  We may have started one in 2010, and if we get a map like this one, the probability will be that we are in one.  I basically said by 2016 we'd be in one, but I had no idea what it would look like.

Here is the thread:  https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=69332.0

In other words:

This is "Obama, Worse Case Scenario" map:

(
)

If you see this map, you may be looking into the future.

A re-alignment would produce a map that would resemble this, if not be identical to this.  An Obama defeat, but a strong showing, would not signal a realignment.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 19, 2011, 06:08:42 PM
Has J.J. been getting into the bath salts recently?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 19, 2011, 07:04:37 PM
In order, what I'm imagining is something (a) tragically stunted, (b) vaguely perverse, (c) indiscriminate and plotless, and (d) dolefully reactionary.

It sounds like you just wrote a question for the SAT.

Quote
Which of the following best describes Nathan's somewhat ostentatious use of advanced vocabulary?

a. tragically stunted
b. vaguely perverse
c. indiscriminate and plotless
d. dolefully reactionary

This is actually how I talk.

So the answer, in terms of my social life, is probably a.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 19, 2011, 07:13:39 PM
Has J.J. been getting into the bath salts recently?

Is that the latest euphemism about someone being a crackhead?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 19, 2011, 07:22:23 PM
Has J.J. been getting into the bath salts recently?

Is that the latest euphemism about someone being a crackhead?

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/17/us/17salts.html?pagewanted=all


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: homelycooking on August 19, 2011, 08:08:46 PM
In order, what I'm imagining is something (a) tragically stunted, (b) vaguely perverse, (c) indiscriminate and plotless, and (d) dolefully reactionary.

It sounds like you just wrote a question for the SAT.

Quote
Which of the following best describes Nathan's somewhat ostentatious use of advanced vocabulary?

a. tragically stunted
b. vaguely perverse
c. indiscriminate and plotless
d. dolefully reactionary

This is actually how I talk.

So the answer, in terms of my social life, is probably a.

Well taken. I was going to choose b, but you've set me straight.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 20, 2011, 01:55:25 AM
- Enjoy drinking Americanos and Lattes at Starbucks daily


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on August 20, 2011, 10:44:16 AM
Compared  to last yaer, this turned out to be kinda a lame birthday.  I didn't even have poewr half the day!

Someone really got into the spirit of his celebrations, I see.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 20, 2011, 01:00:40 PM
Not that I really care, but what is Explosions in the Sky High?  Is it some sort of fireworks show?

And you should go if you want to I guess.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 21, 2011, 01:32:13 AM
I like to masturbate a lot, live with my parents and can grow a beard. You can't find a combination like that anywhere else.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 21, 2011, 04:33:26 AM
Quote from: senator shua link=topic=139797.msg2997054#msg2997054
This is a pointless argument. There are right wing and left wing versions of both.
[/quote



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 21, 2011, 04:39:29 AM
I'm almost certainly smarter than you and my SAT was higher than Lief's.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 22, 2011, 12:52:59 AM
I have not criticized Obama on this too much (if at all)... That said, this might not end up being a good thing for Obama or the West.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 22, 2011, 12:54:58 AM
We need a J. J. Goldmine of...something. The J. J. Wallbanger Institute?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 22, 2011, 01:03:15 AM
We need a J. J. Goldmine of...something. The J. J. Wallbanger Institute?

Maybe they should name an entire wing at MENSA institute after him, dedicated exclusively at his analysis and political forecasts.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 22, 2011, 07:51:15 AM
If pictures emerged of Gaddafi's corpse being hung from a tree by his feet, J. J. would argue that as long as he's still vertical rather than horizontal, he still maintains some degree of control.  And then he'd post the latest gold prices for whatever reason.

Which might lead to a civil war, especially if some groups have reason to believe that Gaddafi isn't really gone. I'm curious about the next Rasmussen poll. We just might see real and permanent movement away from Obama because of this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on August 22, 2011, 10:00:39 AM
Of course he COULD.  But then it would be considered a hate crime.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 22, 2011, 05:11:53 PM
How them () workin out hoss?

Merely stating the truth.  I actually plan it that way.  The more you dig, the better I look.

BTW:  The Tripoli victory parade you were planning to attend today has been canceled.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on August 22, 2011, 05:19:56 PM
He's mentioned the parade thing like four times...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: J. J. on August 22, 2011, 05:27:48 PM
He's mentioned the parade thing like four times...

Five people mentioned it, so I still have one to go.

Does the Atlas offer an Annual Mypalfish Award?  :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 22, 2011, 06:15:49 PM
Word is breaking that Qadafi has drowned in the deluge.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Holmes on August 22, 2011, 08:34:37 PM

I love it. The deluge!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 22, 2011, 08:36:24 PM
Better would've be a joke about how the deluge canceled the supposed Tripoli victory parade (that I have yet to see anyone besides J. J. mention, on or off the forum), considering his broken record repeating of both.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 23, 2011, 04:40:11 AM
If you are picking your college based off of something you heard in a commercial, then the chances of any amount of education helping you, legitimate or otherwise, are slim.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on August 23, 2011, 03:36:36 PM
I hope they asked about Obama, not Osama.

Context:

Quote
Some of the readers of the Reno Gazette-Journal have contacted me to say that reports of last week’s poll on the special election for the open seat in the 2nd Congressional District are bogus.

It showed that Republican Mark Amodei has a 13-point lead over Democrat Kate Marshall with three weeks to go until the Sept 13 election. It would be almost an insurmountable lead, with so little time remaining.

Yet three readers sent e-mails last Friday after the story appeared, saying Marshall was referred to by another name during the robo polling sponsored by Americans For Prosperity, considered a conservative group with Republican leanings.

“I was contacted by the poll to which you refer in your article today,” Kathleen Fogarty wrote last week. “Kate Marshall’s name was not even offered as a candidate. Instead, they listed Kate Jackson as a candidate. I would have voted for Marshall, but when her name was not offered I just hung up. I did listen to the message twice though before I hung up to make sure I heard it correctly.”



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Marokai Backbeat on August 23, 2011, 05:17:08 PM
Scenes of devastation from the Virginia earthquake.

()

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on August 24, 2011, 01:17:33 AM
Re: today's earthquake.

It interrupted my eating of a delicious turkey sandwich with salt and vinegar chips and iced tea.

Stupid Obama and the GOP establishment comprising and coming up with this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 24, 2011, 04:56:07 AM
US is hilarious, but Canada wins the prize of YouFailPoliticsForever.

US: Dr. Ron Paul (R-TX/PA) GOP House, Senate, and majority of governorships
Canada: Conservatve/Libertarian Colition
UK: Tories


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 24, 2011, 08:44:49 AM
straw0man gives this thread his Strawman Seal of ApprovalTM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 24, 2011, 09:13:29 AM
US is hilarious, but Canada wins the prize of YouFailPoliticsForever.

US: Dr. Ron Paul (R-TX/PA) GOP House, Senate, and majority of governorships
Canada: Conservatve/Libertarian Colition
UK: Tories

....just lol. That's all that can be said.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Smid on August 24, 2011, 07:22:56 PM
These are quite interesting poll results..... I have a feeling now that even if unemployment is hovering around 9%, Obama will win in 2012 unless the Republicans nominate someone of caliber, which they refuse to do. I think it will take Europe imploding before the 2012 election for Obama to lose, and even then I think he would have a good chance if he can deflect the blame of the sh**tty economy on to the Europeans and off of him.

The "blame Europe first" strategy?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 25, 2011, 06:41:01 AM
I think "mindless moron" is a prohibted ethic slur for Anglo-American.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 25, 2011, 11:52:38 AM
This was just another Rochambeau formula question with an obvious answer to declare full support of the obvious.

"Should gravity exist? Yes or no?"
"I say Yes as it keeps life on Earth from floating into space."

"Do females have penises? Yes or no?"
"No.  I do not believe any do."

"In your opinion, is broccoli a vegetable?"
"Yes, I believe it qualifies as one."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 25, 2011, 06:55:34 PM
Why do you feel the need to use ethnic slurs in the first place?

You clearly didn't notice this:  ()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 25, 2011, 08:04:54 PM
With Irene coming, we shouldn't rely on national polling after tomorrow, at least until mid week of next week.  There is the potential for a lot of disruption.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 26, 2011, 01:30:37 AM
Quote
... accused of offering to pay a young man he met over Craigslist for "a good time ... [but] they just talked about "baseball and The View."

That is actually what passes for a good time in Indiana, so the excuse is def legit.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Serenity Now on August 26, 2011, 02:14:21 AM
You are not familiar with the history of the coal miners in Britain?

Check thread for who this was addressed to.. ;D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 26, 2011, 02:21:58 AM
I swear to god I came here to post the exact same thing.  Honest.  It's still in my clipboard and everything:

You are not familiar with the history of the coal miners in Britain?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 26, 2011, 05:26:43 AM
He dared to ask this to Al !?!?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 26, 2011, 09:12:30 AM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on August 26, 2011, 09:31:49 AM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the Murkowski-Palin feud.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 26, 2011, 09:42:20 AM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the MurkowskiMekoski-Palin feud.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 26, 2011, 09:46:19 AM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the Murkowski-Palin feud.

Please don't ever label me as "Murkowski" again.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 26, 2011, 09:52:44 AM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the Murkowski-Palin feud.

Please don't ever label me as "Murkowski" again.

I guess you weren't supposed to be Murkowski...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Cincinnatus on August 26, 2011, 09:55:30 AM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the Murkowski-Palin feud.

Please don't ever label me as "Murkowski" again.

I guess you weren't supposed to be Murkowski...

I was thinking more along the lines of Bristol.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 26, 2011, 09:56:38 AM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the Murkowski-Palin feud.

Please don't ever label me as "Murkowski" again.

I guess you weren't supposed to be Murkowski...

I guess you didn't get my joke...

Anyway, I don't think I have a feud with Al. I doubt he thinks we do. The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

All that being said, please clear the halls. The Institute won't tolerate this side chat.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 26, 2011, 09:58:10 AM
Yes no talking in the institute unless you are Naso.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 26, 2011, 10:00:16 AM
Yes no talking in the institute unless you are Naso.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 26, 2011, 10:04:59 AM
Yes no talking in the institute unless you are Naso.

Has he ever showed up in this thread other than in quotes ?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 26, 2011, 10:28:34 AM
Yes no talking in the institute unless you are Naso.

Has he ever showed up in this thread other than in quotes ?

Has Abe ever been to the Lincoln Monument?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 26, 2011, 10:54:43 AM
The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

I'd hate to bring this up here than elsewhere but Marokai and px more recently would certainly qualify. Maybe even Badger today.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 26, 2011, 10:55:29 AM
The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

I'd hate to bring this up here than elsewhere but Marokai and px more recently would certainly qualify. Maybe even Badger today.

And Joe Republic.......but who is counting :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 26, 2011, 11:20:01 AM
The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

I'd hate to bring this up here than elsewhere but Marokai and px more recently would certainly qualify. Maybe even Badger today.

I don't have a feud with Phil. We have our occasional brawls and pokes in the eye, but in the end we drink beer talking about football. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 26, 2011, 11:27:38 AM
The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

I'd hate to bring this up here than elsewhere but Marokai and px more recently would certainly qualify. Maybe even Badger today.

And Joe Republic.......but who is counting :P

That's just a lover's quarrel.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 26, 2011, 11:27:49 AM
If the networks ever tried to remake it, jmfcst would be the most versatile Odd Couple character ever.

"One's a xenophobic homophobic sexist racist ageist bigot with an ego the size of Alaska, constant sense of intellectual superiority, and a hardline interpretation of the Bible.  The other is not him."  Hijinks ensue.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 26, 2011, 03:07:23 PM
The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

I'd hate to bring this up here than elsewhere but Marokai and px more recently would certainly qualify. Maybe even Badger today.

Px doesn't really count (as he explained). Badger doesn't either. As for the rest, I don't have feuds with the deranged.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Cincinnatus on August 26, 2011, 06:07:37 PM
I shouldn't be able to detect your social awkwardness through internet cables. Please, lighten up people.

Sorry Napoleon, but this is just to amusing.. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 27, 2011, 09:21:36 AM
By the way, the hype is due to the fact that yes, this is a nasty hurricane, but secondly...it's been a while. It's the first hurricane to hit America in 3 years. Think about it. The last time a hurricane hit the U.S., John McCain was ahead in the election polls.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 27, 2011, 10:45:36 AM
There are certain things that Mike Naso is the only person on Earth who will say them.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 27, 2011, 02:36:41 PM
Well, technically yes, though we were wanking our own, not the next fellows, so it wasn't really gay.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 27, 2011, 03:18:49 PM
Well, technically yes, though we were wanking our own, not the next fellows, so it wasn't really gay.

Perfect.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 27, 2011, 06:27:50 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 28, 2011, 05:57:01 AM
Let's be fair and admit that there are people thinking this way. They're not many though.
The socialist swede would want to be fair.  This is capitalism baby... I screw you, and then I drink your milkshake.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 28, 2011, 05:57:59 AM
There are certain things that Mike Naso is the only person on Earth who will say them.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 28, 2011, 06:49:53 AM
There are certain things that Mike Naso is the only person on Earth who will say them.

Funny but true. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 28, 2011, 06:52:04 AM

What I found funny was more that BRTD of all people would say that - it is equally true of him.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 28, 2011, 11:35:25 AM

What I found funny was more that BRTD of all people would say that - it is equally true of him.

Now that I think about it, you're entirely right. Several people here, like Naso and BRTD, are true characters.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 28, 2011, 11:51:50 AM
opebo is the ultimate one, though. Who else would make a topic bragging about eating McDonald's at a Burger King while discussing the evils of overreaching corporations?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on August 28, 2011, 01:01:39 PM
opebo is the ultimate one, though. Who else would make a topic bragging about eating McDonald's at a Burger King while discussing the evils of overreaching corporations?

It used to be true, but in recent years Opebo has gone dreadfully repetitive. There is never the randomness that makes Naso so great in his posts.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 28, 2011, 01:03:42 PM
I have great hopes for our new discovery Politico.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 28, 2011, 06:01:25 PM
I have great hopes for our new discovery Politico.

Shouldn't you be reading by now some miner's history book instead of wasting your time at an internet forum?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 28, 2011, 07:01:29 PM
I have great hopes for our new discovery Politico.

Shouldn't you be reading by now some miner's history book instead of wasting your time at an internet forum?

Hmm...?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 29, 2011, 12:28:50 AM
I have great hopes for our new discovery Politico.

Shouldn't you be reading by now some miner's history book instead of wasting your time at an internet forum?

Hmm...?

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=138012.msg3003437#msg3003437 (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=138012.msg3003437#msg3003437)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on August 29, 2011, 12:36:30 AM
The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

I'd hate to bring this up here than elsewhere but Marokai and px more recently would certainly qualify. Maybe even Badger today.

Px doesn't really count (as he explained). Badger doesn't either. As for the rest, I don't have feuds with the deranged.

Was I nothing to you? :,,(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 29, 2011, 08:52:03 AM
Super Tuesday 2012, the home of Bill and Hillary Clinton, Chappaqua, New York.

This is CNN.  This has been an incredible night.  For the first time in the history of the United States, a female candidate has secured the nomination of one of the major parties.  With the results of Super Tuesday now in, we can confirm that Minnesota Congresswoman Michelle Bachman has secured enough delegates to make her the Republican Presidential nominee.

We now take you live to the Michelle Bachman headquarters where she is about to address the nation.

MB:  My friends, my fellow Americans, tonight, we have seen history made in America.  Not only because a female candidate is the nominee of one of our major parties, but because Americans have made it clear they want new direction and new opportunities.  I pledge tonight, a new day for America..........

Hillary (at the top of her voice):  I can't take it Bill, I can't take it anymore.  Michelle Bachman, Michelle Bachman of all people, has succeded where I failed.  She's running for President Bill, as a major candidate.

Hillary hurls a crystal glass across the room, smashing it into a stone wall, shattering into hundreds of pieces.

Hillary (still in a loud voice):  Where's the justice Bill, where's the justice?  I have more ability in my little finger to be President than Bachman has in her entire body.  Why Bill, why, why?

Bill (quietly, calmly):  Hillary, calm down, calm down.  Tymes are different now than they were four years ago.  We just have ta accept this as the way things are now.

Hillary:  Accept it?  Accept it?  How can I accept it Bill, how?  Bachman will go down in history regardless of what happens in the election.  There will be the inevitable comparison with me Bill, with me.  The comparison will be that she won where I lost.  I CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS BILL, I CAN'T, I CAN'T!

Bill:  Hillary, yer makin' too much out uh this.  Ya have ta move past this and look ta the future.  Ya can't let this ruin the rest uh yer life.

Hillary (again at the top of her voice):  HOW COULD SHE WIN, HOW, AND HOW COULD I LOSE, HOW, HOW?  IF YOU KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT HER YOU COULDN'T POSSIBLY BELIEVE SHE WAS A BETTER CANDIDATE THAN ME!

Hillary at this point is storming out of the room.

Bill (by now losing his temper with Hillary, raising his voice):  Oh, for goodness sake Hillary.  Just shut up about Michelle, just shut up!  It just so happens that Michelle and I.....uh, I mean.....

Hillary stops dead in her tracks, turns around, glaring at Bill with an icy look that could freeze a steam engine in its' tracks.

Hillary (speaking in a quiet voice):  What did you say?  Michelle and I?  What do you mean..... Michelle and I?

Bill (clearly flustered, face turning red):  Well, I, uh, nuthin' Hillary, nuthin'.

Hillary is now in a rage.  She runs over to the fireplace mantle, grabs a bronze statue of Thomas Jefferson, charging at Bill with it with a wild look in her eyes.

Hillary:  YOU AND MICHELLE BACHMAN?  HOW COULD YOU?  HOW COULD YOU?  YOU DISGUSTING EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN BEING!  THIS IS THE LAST TIME, THE LAST TIME YOU HEAR ME, THE LAST TIME!  

Bill:  HILLARY, NO, NO, AAAHHH!          


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 29, 2011, 10:16:18 AM
The closest thing I had to a feud was with Flyers years ago.

I'd hate to bring this up here than elsewhere but Marokai and px more recently would certainly qualify. Maybe even Badger today.

Px doesn't really count (as he explained). Badger doesn't either. As for the rest, I don't have feuds with the deranged.

Was I nothing to you? :,,(

Eh, I still don't know if that counts as a feud.  :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 29, 2011, 10:17:45 AM
How dare you remind me of the forum member Conan.

Quite the acerbic moron, wasn't he?  He gave the D-NJ avatar an even worse reputation, just when you thought MAS117 couldn't sink it any lower.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 29, 2011, 05:26:22 PM
I'm just going to leave this here for now, and come back later to actually read it:

()

If anybody has heard of myself, Reaganfan, than you will know I hold the decade of the 1980s in high regard. This is for a number of reasons of which I would like to share to help give those who may not be all that enthusiastic about the decade a little new light into what made the 1980s so spectacular.

Popular culture.

For sure, pop culture is the most memorable aspect of the 1980s. Remember, at the time, most of the entertainers, film-makers, ect were those who grew up in the 1950s and 1960s, thus the amount of "Happy Days" pop culture reflecting on the "Glory Days" of the 1950s and 1960s.

Everything from "Back to the Future" (escaping the present and going into the happy days of 1955) to hit songs like "Summer of '69" (despite having nothing to do with the year 1969) and "'65 Love Affair" where teens in the 1980s were somehow supposed to reflect on love affairs they had in 1965. That song clearly was aimed at those who were already in the 30s and 40s, and was originally titled "'55 Love Affair".

()

The popular culture combined the traditional Reagan-era family values with the retrospecting of the 1950s to allow a picturesque decade.

()

It was a decade where people embraced business and opportunity. Even film villain's like "Gordon Gekko" became almost a protagonist to the viewer. Indeed, his return in 2010's "Wall Street 2: Money Never Sleeps" almost shows him a savior of the Obama era who can help bring us back to the days of Reaganomics.

()

It was a decade where even liberal music agenda's were embraced as patriotic. Ronald Reagan's re-election campaign jumped the opportunity with Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the U.S.A." and people drowned out the verses which clearly spoke a nihilistic attitude towards the era of Ronald Reagan. But people heard simply, "BORN IN THE U.S.A." as a patriotic anthem of sorts coinciding with the right-wing President's prodigious and colossal re-election victory.

Even Madonna can be added into the mix. As Reagan began his second term and continued to try and boost the economy further from the gains made in the first four years, radio's blared out with such phrases as, "We are living in a material world".

Styles. Oh boy. I'm gonna get scalded for this one. YES, I like the styles, especially women's hairstyles, in the 1980s. Keep in mind out here in Ohio, much of these hairstyles continued until around 1994 or so when the "Rachel from Friends" look was in. Even as a boy, I was not pleased and I remember saying so a good 10-15 years ago, even.

When teens in the 2010s try to throw 80s parties, they fail miserably. Sure, they put on leg warmers and make their hair look big, but they miss just how insanely peculiar the styles of the 1980s were.

Look at the woman on the left:
()

I think she's smokin' hot. Gorgeous. Of course that's my personal opinion, but that is an authentic yearbook photo from 1987.

Now some teen girls throwing their 80s party think that THIS is 80s hair:
()

...it's not.

If you wanna throw an 80s party and you're a teenage girl, go into your mom's closet. Find her curling iron, pump high heels, some black or tan pantyhose, a tight skirt and a blouse (without shoulder pads, even die hard 80s fans detest those) and then put in some of her hoop earrings and then maybe you can pull it off. That's 80s fashion, not "like...OMG...WTF....I have leg warmers LOL".

Another thing about girls of the 80s.

Look at this woman:
()

Beautiful, glamorous, mature, elegant woman. 29, 32, 35 years old? Maybe 40 years old? right?

Wrong. That is a photo of an 18 year old girl from her senior yearbook. What a difference from 18 year old girls today who essentially look like kids.

Indeed, given my history and my predisposition for dating older women, I'd much rather prefer 18 year olds still looked like this:

()

Basically, girls looked older.

Everything in the 1980s was old. Indeed, movies had older stars, the characters they played were often older, musicians whom teens were listening to the radio were older, girls looked older, and the President of the United States was the oldest in history.

Take the film "Three Men and a Baby". Three men all near 40 having to take care of a baby left on the doorstep. How much you wanna bet that if they remade that (shudder) they would have Zak Efron in talks to be one of the guys? It wasn't "Three Dudes and a Baby".

()

Or how about the film, "Look Who's Talking"? Kirstie Alley plays a 33 year old woman who has an affair with her 50-something year old boss and John Travolta plays a cab driver in his late 30s who becomes a father figure. If they remade this, how much you wanna bet frickin' Miley Cyrus would play the part once played by a 33 year old woman? It's all about the age that makes the difference.

People young and old are always asking, "Why does the pop culture today suck?" The answer is because it's kids who aren't even old enough or intelligent enough making it all the way. Who cares how many times Kim Kardashian has been diddled, or about the girls who are sixteen and pregnant. They reap what they sow but thrusting it (no pun intended) down people's throats is unwarranted.

It seems we had lots of things that were just naturally older or more laid back in the 1980s. Could that be why the 80s were so conservative? I disagree. I think the liberalism of the 1960s and 1970s permanently moved America towards conservatism. 

TO BE CONTINUED....


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 29, 2011, 05:30:35 PM
Read the whole thing. Not as beautiful as the others, but I still felt sheer joy.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 29, 2011, 05:34:35 PM
And yet this one line reply managed to be even funnier:

Well done Naso.  Those modern-day girls in your photo are fat.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 29, 2011, 05:35:21 PM
And yet this one line reply managed to be even funnier:

Well done Naso.  Those modern-day girls in your photo are fat.

No.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CatoMinor on August 29, 2011, 06:50:35 PM
For such a seemingly intelligent, passionate, and friendly guy, [Rick Santorum] really has a perverse world view.  He's like the nice little grandpa who bags groceries at a grocery store, and yet keeps his daughters as sex slaves and in cages in the basement.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 29, 2011, 07:18:09 PM
Naso is playing us now


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 29, 2011, 07:27:48 PM

The thing is that as ridiculous as it gets, there's still a great dose of reality in what he writes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 29, 2011, 07:28:16 PM
I like to see things in the big picture.

Good for you, Naso. Too bad your efforts are largely unsuccessful.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 29, 2011, 07:36:22 PM
Why is this an issue?

Regards,
John Doe


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 29, 2011, 08:15:48 PM
So a comedy about three middle-aged men taking care of an infant is now right-wing messaging?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 29, 2011, 09:17:27 PM
A lot of Gays have always liked Hillary, for some bizarre reason.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 29, 2011, 11:15:48 PM
Naso unaware that Kal lives in Poland, not New Hampshire...

I like to see things in the big picture.

Good for you, Naso. Too bad your efforts are largely unsuccessful.

Didn't you lose power? Dammit Irene...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Fuzzybigfoot on August 30, 2011, 12:02:29 AM

Yeah, I think so too.  It's insanity!  :o


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 30, 2011, 01:07:24 AM
Wow! Is there a sign "All Nuts and Jokes Are Welcome" at the entrance of this thread?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 30, 2011, 08:07:55 AM
lol @ above hackery assuming AIDS, crack, violent crime, and teenage pregnancy has anything to do with the President.

In fairness, Naso was referring to what currently goes on inside the White House, not society at large.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 30, 2011, 08:18:34 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on August 30, 2011, 11:08:21 AM
It has become pretty clear that only a Paul or a Kucinich will fix our dangerous foreign policy mistakes here in the US of A.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 30, 2011, 11:10:31 AM
It has become pretty clear that only a Paul or a Kucinich will fix our dangerous foreign policy mistakes here in the US of A.

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=140191.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on August 30, 2011, 12:12:37 PM
It has become pretty clear that only a Paul or a Kucinich will fix our dangerous foreign policy mistakes here in the US of A.

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=140191.0

I know.  It had to be posted in both places, as it's hilarious and absurd.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on August 30, 2011, 05:53:35 PM
It has become pretty clear that only a Paul or a Kucinich will fix our dangerous foreign policy mistakes here in the US of A.

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=140191.0
I know.  It had to be posted in both places, as it's hilarious and absurd.

The truth is hilarious and absurd at times. It is also quite frustrating.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on August 30, 2011, 10:25:28 PM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the Murkowski-Palin feud.

In fairness, no one would ever call Phil a know-it-all.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 30, 2011, 11:04:10 PM

It's great because it had to have made Mr. Know It All's head explode. Classic comment!

Your feud with Al is as epic as the Murkowski-Palin feud.

In fairness, no one would ever call Phil a know-it-all.

See. And we thought we were so different.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 31, 2011, 01:48:53 AM
...when are all the news stories of Obama's family living illegally in the USA on taxpayer assistance going to end? -- its all they the news report on anymore.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 31, 2011, 02:17:26 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on August 31, 2011, 03:32:30 PM
I love how he said "Goggle", opebo's cute deliberate mispellings of website names are hilarious and brilliant. I spit out my drink laughing when I read him referring to "Facialbook".

I can't possibly be the first to think BRTD's opebo-adoration is just an act.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on August 31, 2011, 05:41:12 PM
I love how he said "Goggle", opebo's cute deliberate mispellings of website names are hilarious and brilliant. I spit out my drink laughing when I read him referring to "Facialbook".

I can't possibly be the first to think BRTD's opebo-adoration is just an act.

Oh no, it isn't an act at all.  It's the Love that dare not speak its name. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_love_that_dare_not_speak_its_name)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on August 31, 2011, 06:43:52 PM
After three weeks of law school, I'm strongly considering taking up coke, blow, weed and Chrystal meth.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on September 01, 2011, 10:54:45 AM
This racebaiting is silly.  It's quite obvious the Tea Party hates poor people equally, regardless of race or religion.

what are you, filling in for opebo while he's out spreading disease?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on September 02, 2011, 01:28:20 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 02, 2011, 02:31:07 AM

Carl...oh excuse me....CARL, do you ever join any threads or do you just create them?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 02, 2011, 09:57:54 AM
Humorous for style more than substance.

MITT  ROMNEY  WILL BE THE NOMINEE 2012  I'M WILLING TO PUT $10,000 CASH ON IT  THIS IS HIS TIME HE KNOWS IT.  THE  BAD ECONOMY IS GOING TO GIVE HIM THE NOMINATION. NOW FOR THE GENERAL STAY TUNED.....


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 02, 2011, 11:57:16 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on September 03, 2011, 03:15:57 PM
Many people who know me asked why I would vote against Barack Obama? Was I a racist? Was I a misogynist? No.

My vote isn't against the Barack Obama everyone likes personally, or the man who carried out a mission to kill Osama bin Laden. My vote is against the culture, and the types of people who have the mindset and the attitude and thinking that Barack Obama caters to.

For example...I greatly dislike the hip-hop culture. For heaven's sake...we had a hip-hop star create a music video showing the staged execution of a child. I think to myself...how can this stop? I hate this stuff. It needs to end.

Then I turn on the TV and see this:
()

"Yo, let's get rid of George Bush and Rock the Vote!"

....that makes me want George Bush even more.

Or I see this:

()

That's like a poison pill. I am always aggravated by "hand signs" let alone hip-hop music. They're endorsing Obama? That leans me the other way. See what I mean?

When I get aggravated by people who make clear they vote Democrat, that makes me want to vote Republican as a protest towards the types of people that aggravate me.

If teachers and I have a rocky past, and I see the teacher's bashing a Bush or Perry and the unions endorsing Obama, that makes me want to vote Perry.

You understand what I'm trying to say? It's not race...after all...I voted for a black man for Governor of Ohio in 2006 when many other Republicans did not on the basis of race. It's not against the man who killed Osama bin Laden, which, as you may recall made me more supportive of him at the time than many in his own party.

If you have to be nice to someone who is being rude or complaining, does that mean you want to be nice? No. You have to. Why? Because of fear of legal action. Okay so where the problem? Frivolous lawsuits, ambulance chasers, ect. Who do those people cater to? The Democratic Party. Bada-bing...voting Republican.

See? So it's not even that I don't give them the chance, it's that when people I dislike cater to a certain political party, I'm making damn sure I'm not voting for them.

I actually believe this has gone on in politics for many years. Hippies and protesters everywhere...America elects Nixon. Protesters and demonstrations everywhere while rap music fills the airwaves promoting social unrest...America elects George Bush.

Do you see what I'm trying to say?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 03, 2011, 04:34:08 PM
Ah, Naso. "I don't hate Obama because he's black. I hate him because he's the kind of person who promotes hip-hop culture."

I guess this means he wouldn't support Keystone Phil either.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on September 03, 2011, 05:11:16 PM
Maybe if I got really, really stoned, I might understand it all a bit more. As it is, what is Naso really trying to tell me?  I don't know.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Middle-aged Europe on September 03, 2011, 05:53:04 PM
Naso votes Republican because he hates hip-hop?

That ain't cool, bro.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 03, 2011, 09:52:00 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 04, 2011, 12:10:21 AM
Many people who know me asked why I would vote against Barack Obama? Was I a racist? Was I a misogynist? No.

My vote isn't against the Barack Obama everyone likes personally, or the man who carried out a mission to kill Osama bin Laden. My vote is against the culture, and the types of people who have the mindset and the attitude and thinking that Barack Obama caters to.

For example...I greatly dislike the hip-hop culture. For heaven's sake...we had a hip-hop star create a music video showing the staged execution of a child. I think to myself...how can this stop? I hate this stuff. It needs to end.

Then I turn on the TV and see this:
()

"Yo, let's get rid of George Bush and Rock the Vote!"

....that makes me want George Bush even more.

Or I see this:

()

That's like a poison pill. I am always aggravated by "hand signs" let alone hip-hop music. They're endorsing Obama? That leans me the other way. See what I mean?

When I get aggravated by people who make clear they vote Democrat, that makes me want to vote Republican as a protest towards the types of people that aggravate me.

If teachers and I have a rocky past, and I see the teacher's bashing a Bush or Perry and the unions endorsing Obama, that makes me want to vote Perry.

You understand what I'm trying to say? It's not race...after all...I voted for a black man for Governor of Ohio in 2006 when many other Republicans did not on the basis of race. It's not against the man who killed Osama bin Laden, which, as you may recall made me more supportive of him at the time than many in his own party.

If you have to be nice to someone who is being rude or complaining, does that mean you want to be nice? No. You have to. Why? Because of fear of legal action. Okay so where the problem? Frivolous lawsuits, ambulance chasers, ect. Who do those people cater to? The Democratic Party. Bada-bing...voting Republican.

See? So it's not even that I don't give them the chance, it's that when people I dislike cater to a certain political party, I'm making damn sure I'm not voting for them.

I actually believe this has gone on in politics for many years. Hippies and protesters everywhere...America elects Nixon. Protesters and demonstrations everywhere while rap music fills the airwaves promoting social unrest...America elects George Bush.

Do you see what I'm trying to say?

Of course I missed the thread (or was it just one post?)! Damn it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 04, 2011, 04:17:56 AM
Was that thread deleted ? I can't access it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on September 04, 2011, 12:17:12 PM
Scenario #9:  Michael has had a long frustrating day
1955- Michael meets friends after school at the local malt shoppe and forgets his troubles.
2011- Michael goes on the internet.  He proceeds to piss and moan and pines for a time that never existed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 04, 2011, 02:19:12 PM
Let's try some non-fictional stories:

1955: Elizabeth Eckford, a star student, transfers into Central High School.

()

Wow, the good old days were swell.

But she was bringing in hip-hop culture!  It wasn't about race!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: KEmperor on September 04, 2011, 04:38:38 PM
I became a democrat because I am into extreme sports like skateboarding

I think I found the anti-Naso


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 04, 2011, 05:21:37 PM
1955: Ike sure is a swell President!

2011: 9/11.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 04, 2011, 06:28:34 PM
1955:  Marty accidentally interrupts the moment when his parents were supposed to meet each other for the first time.  His mother develops a crush on Marty, and later attempts to seduce him with alcohol.  His nerdy father punches the school bully in the face.

2015:  There are hover boards and flying cars and sh**t, and people dress like it's the '80s.  Marty's wife is a MILF.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: TheDeadFlagBlues on September 04, 2011, 06:43:46 PM
1955- John is black, he tries to go to school with white people. He gets lynched.
2011- John is black, he tries to go to school with white people. Naso makes a racist thread on an internet forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 04, 2011, 06:51:47 PM
Can we just merge that entire thread with this one?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: courts on September 04, 2011, 08:38:01 PM
Did Naso really not go to a physical high school? That might account for his not knowing squat about history or schools, but apparantly knowing a whole lot about old 80s tv shows and movies.

Naso was home schooled on his computer.

I remember he blocked me on AIM for a short period when I asked him if his high school had won its homecoming fantasy football game.

Hardly the best reply on that thread though.. Amazingly, Kal beat me to that one. And it was by Ben!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 05, 2011, 12:15:32 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 05, 2011, 12:27:41 AM
Beat ya on that one.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 05, 2011, 08:40:19 AM

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 05, 2011, 12:26:02 PM
I doubt he'll be running this year.

He should start off with walking and build his endurance  from there. If he's ready, jogging in summer 2012.  Then maybe by 2016 he'll be in good shape to make a serious run.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 05, 2011, 12:34:34 PM

Reminds me of a similar joke I made years ago, simply by posting a picture of a Viagra packet.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on September 06, 2011, 01:31:00 AM
The edit here is funny:

Admit it BRTD, the main thing you care about in MN is just putting Rice County in MN-1 right?  You should have studied harder and gone to Carleton College.  :)

Edited by an alum :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 06, 2011, 01:36:55 AM
Jfern doesn't understand how primaries worked before 1972.

So, there was an incumbent President who ran for re-election.
He got less than a third of the pledged votes in the primary, less than that the combined total of 2 governors who challenged him.
He won only around 60% of the primary states.

Clearly he went down in flames in the general election.

Oh wait, LBJ won in 1964 by 24 points. So much for that stupid meme.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 06, 2011, 11:59:13 PM
Bass + Unclean vocals = Me
Vocals = BRTD
Drums = PiT
Lead Guitar = Mechaman
Rhythm Guitar = Inks
Keyboards/Programming = Cathcon

Have no idea if BRTD, PiT, Mechaman and Inks actually play these instruments.

lol.
I can't even play "Teen Spirit".

Why would you want to?  If you're going to play guitar, play good music... Join me and play acoustic :P

I never said anything about liking it.  Just that I suck that bad at playing guitar.

A dead monkey could play guitar better than Kurt Cobain.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on September 07, 2011, 04:50:09 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?action=profile;u=6970
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?action=profile;u=234


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on September 07, 2011, 05:16:55 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?action=profile;u=6970
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?action=profile;u=234
and https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?action=profile;u=6269


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on September 07, 2011, 06:08:50 PM
Eh, I've gotten better but need to stop playing my snark too safe.

However, I don't think I've qualified yet for the Institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 07, 2011, 10:39:06 PM
I should note, I fell asleep about 10 minutes after the Reagan montage. I woke up to hear Perry say something about executions. Watching the rest on YouTube now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on September 08, 2011, 06:48:28 AM
I've only played WoW once and that was cuz I got a free demo from Hot Topic. I mean, I generally stay indoors because I hate being outside and being around many of the people that I live near, so I just write songs and sleep all day. I don't get that stereotype either.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 08, 2011, 10:59:57 PM
GUYS, BEST POST IN THE HISTORY OF THE FORUM WAS JUST POSTED, GET IT WHILE ITS HOT:

J.J., I wanted to congratulate you on your assignment "A Typical Day In My Life". I think you did a superb job with it. So good that I think I'll share it with everyone else.

() (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/33/picture2df.png/)




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 08, 2011, 11:10:27 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhTiJEYqqY8


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on September 08, 2011, 11:15:31 PM
That's a thing of beauty.  I say we close the Institute as nothing it produces can possibly trump that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 09, 2011, 12:51:46 AM
He even leaped onto the piano like the old days. Insane.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 09, 2011, 07:07:34 AM
GUYS, BEST POST IN THE HISTORY OF THE FORUM WAS JUST POSTED, GET IT WHILE ITS HOT:

J.J., I wanted to congratulate you on your assignment "A Typical Day In My Life". I think you did a superb job with it. So good that I think I'll share it with everyone else.

() (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/33/picture2df.png/)



()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 09, 2011, 07:18:07 AM
GUYS, BEST POST IN THE HISTORY OF THE FORUM WAS JUST POSTED, GET IT WHILE ITS HOT:

J.J., I wanted to congratulate you on your assignment "A Typical Day In My Life". I think you did a superb job with it. So good that I think I'll share it with everyone else.

() (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/33/picture2df.png/)



()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 09, 2011, 07:57:42 AM
Now, after I saw this, my life is complete.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 09, 2011, 09:17:04 AM

So you're going to leave now?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on September 09, 2011, 09:18:43 AM
He has just committed suicide.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 09, 2011, 10:14:27 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 09, 2011, 10:46:27 AM
When the revolution comes, the... hmm... fourth... group of people up against the wall will be the people who run cash-for-gold scams.

That may be true but the third group of people up against the wall will be annoying people on forums who mindlessly post replies to themselves filled with pointless numbers and vacuous statements.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 09, 2011, 02:29:36 PM

Context needed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 10, 2011, 06:43:32 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=oJ-WTFA2vXY

Probably the most crass and exploitative 'tribute' you'll see over the next few days.  And yes, that is Cain himself singing God Bless America over graphic footage of UA Flight 175 hitting the South Tower.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 10, 2011, 08:21:02 AM
The Blubb is back in action:

Good evening, my name is Jeff Boss.  Thank you for taking an interest in my campaign.  I will be running as a Democrat in the New Hampshire primary.  Given my state's proximity to New Hampshire, I will be making many visits to New Hampshire over the coming months.  My platform includes legalization of bestiality and decriminalization of all drugs. 

This campaign started almost ten years ago today, when I witnessed a family member my sister in law, high up in the NSA planning the 911 attack. She was talking about helping Ramsi Yousef (responsible for the 93 bombing at the World Trade Center) call his uncle Khalid Sheikh Mohammed (considered the mastermind of the 911 attack) from the NSA secret prison in  Alexandria, VA,  and they were talking about  flying planes  into buildings.  I never heard the dates or the names of the buildings and I never thought anything would ever happen. But on September 10, 2001, I was told to go the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001. My first day in a new office, I was told not to be late. I was late.  The NSA wanted the oil in Iraq, which has the second largest oil reserve in the world. As long as there is civil war and mayhem in Iraq, the US controls the oil. If the Iraq government gets their act together, it will want control of its oil. Certain powerful people in the NSA told me that the electronic voting machines can be hacked into and the vote changed within seconds. If we do not have our vote, then we are not a democracy. By creating a culture of Fear, the NSA has helped to pass the Patriot Act, which trashes our constitution. Now, the government is bailing out the automakers, banks, insurance Companies, etc. When they bail out these companies, they in fact, own and control them. When the government controls these companies, it is like Russian style communism. Our civil liberties are rapidly disappearing. I will not let them hijack my country.

For more information, including my comprehensive platform, please visit my website:

 http://www.jeffbossforpresident.org/

()

Yours very truly,

Jeff Boss


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 10, 2011, 02:35:42 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on September 11, 2011, 04:50:17 AM
Naso strikes back in style!

I want to know what happened to the bear

For some people, the bear is easy to see. Other's don't see it at all.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 11, 2011, 04:25:01 PM
Is this thread an in-joke that I just don't get?

It's a running gag that long ago stopped running, but keeps gagging.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 11, 2011, 06:20:10 PM
I think that honoring those lost and remembering what happened that day is fitting because it is the 10th anniversary of September 11, 2001. Now, if this video was released on a random day as just something exploiting 9/11, then it would be offensive.

Remember, this same discussion came up over seven years ago when Bush's re-election campaign released the first ad with a small reference to 9/11, which was clearly George Bush's finest moment as a leader and likely what history will mostly judge him on. Instantly, he was attacked and said to be "exploiting 9/11 for political gain". I'd disagree. I'd also disagree if someone said that if the President uses the death of Bin Laden in an ad for his seemingly unlikely re-election. It's an achievement and it should be able to be used.




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on September 11, 2011, 10:50:03 PM
Am I missing something?  Are discussions about religious attitudes to homosexuality not welcome in Religion & Philosophy any more?

Of course not, f****t.

EDIT:  Maybe this should be in the Sulfur Mine instead.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 12, 2011, 12:54:59 AM
We are a free people even if that means that we get to choose to be less educated in favor of being wealthier or smoking ourselves to death.

Ladies and Gentlemen, the deluge.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on September 12, 2011, 07:38:32 AM
In which CJK eviscerates Obama's 9/11 memorial speech with dazzling wit and skill.

From Obama’s 9/11 speech
Quote
The Bible tells us, "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning."
Ten years ago, America confronted one of our darkest nights.
Actually, it all happened in broad daylight.
Quote
Mighty towers crumbled.
If they were so mighty, why did they crumble?




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 12, 2011, 03:09:20 PM
#Blubbing



The selection of states is interesting. All states Obama won in 2008, but not NC or ID (could they be seen as lost causes) and not PA, MI, IA, WI (considered more safe)


Not sure about NC, but I know Idaho is a lost cause.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on September 12, 2011, 04:07:20 PM

Seduction is more suitable for personal messaging. It may not be in the TOS but consider it an unwritten rule of forumgoers.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 12, 2011, 04:12:06 PM
Oakvale is first person from Ireland I've "met" who likes good music (referring to display name).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 12, 2011, 04:42:58 PM
Some have claimed that my unique perspective on things from politics to pop culture make me "America."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on September 12, 2011, 04:46:16 PM
Oakvale is first person from Ireland I've "met" who likes good music (referring to display name).

Oakcale seems more similar to a real life person than most other posters.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 12, 2011, 05:17:21 PM
Oakvale is first person from Ireland I've "met" who likes good music (referring to display name).

Oakcale seems more similar to a real life person than most other posters.

Typical Atlas poster:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 12, 2011, 05:30:26 PM
Oakvale is first person from Ireland I've "met" who likes good music (referring to display name).

Oakcale seems more similar to a real life person than most other posters.

Typical Atlas poster:

()

WHERE DID YOU FIND THAT PHOTO???


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 12, 2011, 07:16:52 PM
Hey, is there a heavy Orthodox Jew community in this district? Also, has Gay Marriage resonated as an issue in this Special?

there is are 3 Orthodox communities (Belle Harbor, Bayswater, and most importantly Far Rockway) in this district  (in addition part of this district overlaps with the 9th (though most of the Orthodox areas are out of the 9th))
yes Jane Deacy has accused Phillip Goldfeder an Orthodox Jew (who is against gay marriage but not vocal about it) of not championing to get rid of it in a hope to connect him with Weprin.

There also is another special election for an assembly race in the 9th Congressional district where the democrat is also an Orthodox Jew (who seems to be against gay marriage but since there is no real race it's hard to tell 100%) and the Republican is a place holder because the Republicans are to stupid and corrupt (there is a lot of infighting in the Queens Republican party and in order to get support in the chairmanship race they put up a person who has no chance of winning) to put up a real candidate. (though the good thing about this race is that when both Republicans and Orthodox jews in this very Orthodox district go to the polls they are most likely going to vote for Turner)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on September 12, 2011, 07:22:20 PM
Some have claimed that my unique perspective on things from politics to pop culture make me "America". Or that I epitomize many simple minded folks throughout the country who may vote either way in a Presidential election.

To have an honest discussion, I have some advice for President Obama. Clearly, the odds are stacked against him. If this were an incumbent Republican President, I know people like myself and Keystone Phil and Inks would be saying in conversations almost jokingly, "You know we have no shot, right?" to which an agreeing chuckle would follow. This was much the case throughout 2007 and 2008 when despite the ups and downs we all knew it was over. Indeed, on election night when Ohio was called for Obama, I remember being on the phone with Keystone Phil to which he laughed and said, "Ohio was called ALREADY!?!" and laughed. It was an acknowledgment of defeat that we knew was coming. Indeed, the Obama/Biden ticket is in much the same situation and I think insiders know it.

A few tips.

#1. Acknowledge the bad economy

When Obama tries to say things are tough but getting better, people don't believe him. Honestly, every few months things seem worse. Someone you know can't afford to buy a house, someone you know complains about high gas prices, tax season comes and knocks someone out. Every time they hear Barack Obama say things are "getting better" they get irritated. It's like someone having a broken leg with the bone sticking out and you saying, "It's okay, no big deal". Their response would be, "IT IS A BIG DEAL MY BONE IS STICKING OUT OF LEG YOU IDIOT!!!" I know it's a silly analogy, but it's true.

The only time Carter had a real shot of defeating Governor Reagan in 1980 was when he made acknowledgments of the bad situation and tried to offer new solutions. If Obama says things are getting better, or that we need to spend more money, it's done. Toast. Adios. Buona sera.

#2. Don't attack business

When the economy is down and businesses are prevailing, many people become interested in what is making those businesses tick. Don't attack Romney for saying, "Corporations are people". If you do that, you might garner a few thousand voters you probably already had in New York and Connecticut, but people in hard-hit Michigan or Pennsylvania and Ohio will be offended. "My father worked for a corporation. When Obama attacks them he is attacking my dad." I can see the ads against Obama now. I know liberals hate it, but it's true...corporations are composed of workers, people. If you attack corporations, you're attacking people and you will lose, potentially badly in states such as Michigan and Pennsylvania. Don't attack lower-paying jobs in Texas when many people in America can't get a job at all. You're attacking the little man, which is the only thing defending has allowed the Democratic Party to win three elections in the last 30 years.

#3. Don't misjudge the tea party

I do not consider myself a tea party conservative, but if I were running against a candidate who had the tea party backing, I'd be terrified. The turnout of these voters will be immense next year, and I can imagine a family in Iowa or Colorado or North Carolina registering their 18 year old sons and daughters and coming out in droves, carpools, and unprecedented turnout. Underestimate at your own risk.

That's my two cents.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 13, 2011, 04:05:12 AM
Wild unicorns ran through the woods, farting diamonds and childrens' toys whenever candy rained from the skies. Massive street orgies were held on alternating Tuesdays, of course ending with everyone joining their hands in a circle while rolling a chocolate-scented blunt with their toes. Lollipop trees and gumdrop fruits were in every garden, and on a good day a hunter could catch a dozen gummy bears with Swedish Fish bait. The White House was made of white chocolate, only replaced by concrete and marble for protection.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 13, 2011, 06:31:55 AM
Hi there, Speaking of death prediction, I find it really odd that one of the on-line death prediction services showed me the same death date that I was foretold in my dream about a year ago. www yourdeathdate.info/1/index.html - I can’t explain this coincidence in any other way except that there must be some kind of magic involved here.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 13, 2011, 11:00:05 AM
We get this one in here yet?

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=140737.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 13, 2011, 11:12:37 AM
We get this one in here yet?

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=140737.0

Vander Blubb is a national treasure.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on September 13, 2011, 07:43:10 PM
()

Guess who.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on September 14, 2011, 04:37:20 AM
Can you be 100-0 if you like stereotypically gay things? Like say you like some musicals or opera.


I think so, considering you can like musicals and opera without being sexually attracted to other men. It's rare, but it does happen.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 14, 2011, 08:57:30 AM
The hilarious part of this post is obvious...


I'm sitting here at 1am just outta work with some Taco Bell®  and am very pleased to see America continue a slow but sure push in a conservative direction.

I look forward to crying faces in Grant Park next fall, only this time, during a concession speech.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 14, 2011, 03:05:49 PM
Why do you all refer to George W Bush as "dubya?"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on September 14, 2011, 03:11:37 PM

You're mean, Mr. Kemp.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 14, 2011, 03:15:07 PM
Blubber strikes again!

I've just heard on good authority that Santorum is planning on dropping out of the race within the next week or two.

Why am I excited about this?  Well, turns out he might be getting ready to jump into the Senate race.  :)  Yes, it'd be great to see Santorum in the White House ... but the next best thing would be to watch Casey go down in flames.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on September 14, 2011, 03:37:12 PM
The hilarious part of this post is obvious...


I'm sitting here at 1am just outta work with some Taco Bell®  and am very pleased to see America continue a slow but sure push in a conservative direction.

I look forward to crying faces in Grant Park next fall, only this time, during a concession speech.

The fact that Naso feels the need to observe trademarks in casual internet posts?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 14, 2011, 04:11:00 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 16, 2011, 09:04:53 AM
Funny for other reasons...

I was around 10, and she was swinging around the stick, and it hit me pretty strongly, I had a fair lump. She was my sister. Bitch. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on September 16, 2011, 09:08:40 AM
A true story, but in the first entendre ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 16, 2011, 02:10:22 PM
introduced my son to Top Gun last night

Was this his first encounter with homosexuality?

only if you assume it was his first Tom Cruise movie....but it was the cut version of Top Gun, so he was spared most of the sword fighting scenes


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Cincinnatus on September 16, 2011, 02:12:46 PM
I think I'm going to call Phil a douche and Sam a f****t from now. I mean, they are factual statements after all.

This should be an interesting thread until the mods unlock or delete it..


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 19, 2011, 08:54:42 AM
Quote
New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie (R) was "thinking about running now, very carefully."

He's certainly wise to do it very carefully.  Definitely consult a doctor first, at least.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 19, 2011, 11:33:38 AM
Her best feature is her massive mammaries, if you're into that sort of thing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 20, 2011, 01:54:52 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 20, 2011, 03:27:44 PM
This is to scary. Please stop! Or please revise it to have Obama wear a bulletproof vest.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 20, 2011, 04:36:02 PM

I opened this thread hoping to see some intellectual conversation, instead I find myself endorsing this cat for President.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 20, 2011, 08:23:37 PM
Another gold from Blubb!

Barack Obama is the worst thing that ever happened to the Democratic party.  He should gracefully announce that he is not running, and the Democrats should not field a replacement.  If Democrats just concede the presidential election off the bat, then there will be more independents showing up for primaries and we can choose a somewhat sane Republican (Romney) over a crazy tea partier like Perry.

Obama should not run again, for the good of the nation and for the good of the party.  Why should the DNC spend billions of dollars propping up this failed Presidency.  Instead we should try to save seats in Congress and focus on winning it back in 2014.  If Obama wants to save American liberalism, he should do it.  He won't though because he is an egotist, if Democrats dropped below 100 seats in the House he wouldn't care as long as he was still President.  He's a maschosit who loves being scrwed over by the Republicans.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 20, 2011, 10:36:11 PM
I'll admit this made me chuckle a bit, even if it is mind-numbingly stupid:

Literal interpretation is still a form of interpretation...

Jesus:  Yo, Nathan, buddy, please pass me the salt.

Nathan:  Here you go, my Lord, here's pepper.

Jesus:  Nathan, remember how I promised to throw you in the lake of fire last?

Nathan:  Yes, my Lord, you did.

Jesus:  You misinterpreted, for the First shall be Last, and the Last shall be First!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on September 21, 2011, 01:21:27 AM
I'll admit this made me chuckle a bit, even if it is mind-numbingly stupid:

Literal interpretation is still a form of interpretation...

Jesus:  Yo, Nathan, buddy, please pass me the salt.

Nathan:  Here you go, my Lord, here's pepper.

Jesus:  Nathan, remember how I promised to throw you in the lake of fire last?

Nathan:  Yes, my Lord, you did.

Jesus:  You misinterpreted, for the First shall be Last, and the Last shall be First!

In the movie of jmfcstverse, Jesus is played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, and I'm apparently Timothy Spall or something.

And you know? I find it impossible to be offended by this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 21, 2011, 05:15:57 AM
I'll admit this made me chuckle a bit, even if it is mind-numbingly stupid:

Jesus:  Yo, Nathan, buddy, please pass me the salt.

Nathan:  Here you go, my Lord, here's pepper.

Jesus:  Nathan, remember how I promised to throw you in the lake of fire last?

Nathan:  Yes, my Lord, you did.

Jesus:  You misinterpreted, for the First shall be Last, and the Last shall be First!

In the movie of jmfcstverse, Jesus is played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, and I'm apparently Timothy Spall or something.

And you know? I find it impossible to be offended by this.


Guys, the reason this was funny is because it is mind-numbingly stupid.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on September 21, 2011, 09:23:25 AM
In the movie of jmfcstverse, Jesus is played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, and I'm apparently Timothy Spall or something.

Timothy Spall?  I havent seen any of his movies, so I'm not comprehending your reference, but glad you understood mine.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on September 21, 2011, 09:39:06 AM
In the movie of jmfcstverse, Jesus is played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, and I'm apparently Timothy Spall or something.

Timothy Spall?  I havent seen any of his movies, so I'm not comprehending your reference, but glad you understood mine.

Timothy Spall has made a career of playing cowardly and odious minor villains in such films as the Harry Potter series, and also I think played Albert Pierrepoint at one point.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on September 21, 2011, 09:47:05 AM
Timothy Spall has made a career of playing cowardly and odious minor villains in such films as the Harry Potter series, and also I think played Albert Pierrepoint at one point.

I havent seen any of the Harry Potter flicks, nor Lord of the Rings, nor Indiana Jones


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 21, 2011, 12:06:48 PM
Timothy Spall has made a career of playing cowardly and odious minor villains in such films as the Harry Potter series, and also I think played Albert Pierrepoint at one point.

He actually made his career playing distinctly non-lovable losers (notably Barry in Auf Wiedersehen, Pet), before heading in that direction.

Also, his son drowns cats.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on September 21, 2011, 12:11:08 PM
Timothy Spall has made a career of playing cowardly and odious minor villains in such films as the Harry Potter series, and also I think played Albert Pierrepoint at one point.

Also, his son drowns cats.

Wait...what?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 21, 2011, 12:15:11 PM
Timothy Spall has made a career of playing cowardly and odious minor villains in such films as the Harry Potter series, and also I think played Albert Pierrepoint at one point.

Also, his son drowns cats.

Wait...what?

His son is also an actor. A character he played in a recent BBC drama half-drowned a cat as a threat. Can't seem to find a video or a picture of the moment in question, so this will have to do:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on September 21, 2011, 12:18:48 PM
Timothy Spall has made a career of playing cowardly and odious minor villains in such films as the Harry Potter series, and also I think played Albert Pierrepoint at one point.

Also, his son drowns cats.

Wait...what?

His son is also an actor. A character he played in a recent BBC drama half-drowned a cat as a threat. Can't seem to find a video or a picture of the moment in question, so this will have to do:

()

Oh...thought he actually was cruel to the best pets...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 21, 2011, 12:24:11 PM
Oh...thought he actually was cruel to the best pets...

Better hope he's not into method acting, no?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 21, 2011, 12:50:01 PM
I havent seen any of the Harry Potter flicks, nor Lord of the Rings, nor Indiana Jones

They're all Satanic?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bullmoose88 on September 21, 2011, 01:26:50 PM
I havent seen any of the Harry Potter flicks, nor Lord of the Rings, nor Indiana Jones

They're all Satanic?

no, they're just not my type of flicks, they bore me....same goes for National Treasure and Pirates of the Caribbean...but at least Diane Kruger and Keira Knightley make those two movies worth watching.

Indiana Jones bores you?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on September 21, 2011, 01:45:58 PM
I havent seen any of the Harry Potter flicks, nor Lord of the Rings, nor Indiana Jones

They're all Satanic?

no, they're just not my type of flicks, they bore me....same goes for National Treasure and Pirates of the Caribbean...but at least Diane Kruger and Keira Knightley make those two movies worth watching.

Those don't really tend to be my kind of movies either, but there are some very good actors in the Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings movies.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on September 21, 2011, 03:39:22 PM

and National Treasure falls into the MacGyver category (correctly guess a whole paragraph of esoteric crap with the hint of a single letter)…which bores me also.


ahem


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on September 21, 2011, 03:57:23 PM
A MacGyver type movie is like:  “Appears to be no one home….what’s this?  A small piece of paper with the letter Q on it?….what could Q stand for?...well…in 720AD the Queen of England had a niece named Quindline who drowned during a site seeing trip along the Nile…so we better check the boat dock right away!”


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on September 21, 2011, 03:57:58 PM

and National Treasure falls into the MacGyver category (correctly guess a whole paragraph of esoteric crap with the hint of a single letter of the alphabet)…which bores me also.


ahem

does that help?

No, I just find it humorous that one who seems to be certain of the meaning of:

"And there appeared another wonder in heaven; and behold a great red dragon, having seven heads and ten horns, and seven crowns upon his heads."

would say such a thing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on September 21, 2011, 04:40:39 PM

and National Treasure falls into the MacGyver category (correctly guess a whole paragraph of esoteric crap with the hint of a single letter of the alphabet)…which bores me also.


ahem

does that help?

No, I just find it humorous that one who seems to be certain of the meaning of:

"And there appeared another wonder in heaven; and behold a great red dragon, having seven heads and ten horns, and seven crowns upon his heads."

would say such a thing.

well, how hard is it, exactly, to take the verse you quoted in Rev 12:3 and compare it to Rev 13:1 and Rev 17:3 and conclude they represent the same thing?

Rev 12:3 Then another sign appeared in heaven: an enormous red dragon with seven heads and ten horns and seven crowns on its heads.

Rev 13:1 The dragon stood on the shore of the sea. And I saw a beast coming out of the sea. It had ten horns and seven heads, with ten crowns on its horns, and on each head a blasphemous name.

Rev 17:3 Then the angel carried me away in the Spirit into a wilderness. There I saw a woman sitting on a scarlet beast that was covered with blasphemous names and had seven heads and ten horns.

That’s hardly MacGyverish.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 21, 2011, 04:53:19 PM
()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on September 21, 2011, 04:59:25 PM
It's time to nationalize this institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 21, 2011, 10:16:42 PM
Why were you even talking film in here?  For like a whole page?

Rhetorical question; don't answer it, just GTFO.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 22, 2011, 04:41:11 AM
Back in theme... Some fun about the German voting system :


The absurdity of an electoral system in action:

- The constituency of Lichtenberg 1 has been wrongly called for the SPD. Instead, it is won by the candidate of the Left Party: http://www.tagesspiegel.de/berlin/spd-verliert-direktmandat/4628022.html
 (http://www.tagesspiegel.de/berlin/spd-verliert-direktmandat/4628022.html)
- That means that one person less is elected on the Left list, because of the extra direct seat. That's bad news for some guy on the Left party list, but a zero sum game for the party so far.
But now it is getting funny:

- As a result of loosing Lichtenberg 1, the SPD district list in Lichtenberg no longer has an overhang.

- So the SPD looses that overhang mandate.

- As a result of that, two compensatory seats (in contrast to Bundestag elections, overhang seats in Berlin are balanced by compensatory seats for the not overhanging lists to ensure exact proportional representation) fall away: One for the Greens, and one for the Left (!).

- So the new Berlin parliament is shrinking from 152 to 149 seats: One less each for SPD (overhang mandate), Greens and Left (compensatory seats).

- So the bottom line is: By winning Lichtenberg 1, the Left has a net loss of one seat.

---

And if you don't understand that, it is not because of the flaws of the Berlin electoral system or my English writing skills, but is entirely your fault :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 22, 2011, 10:07:52 AM

Wrong.


Quote
Some fun about the German voting system :

Stop.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 22, 2011, 11:18:35 AM
Freedom Fighter, obviously.  By the way this thread should be removed and its creator banned because of the referrence to doing a violence to a public figure.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 22, 2011, 11:52:09 AM

If you read it you'd understand what's funny.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 22, 2011, 12:01:14 PM
For the record, the post is about the fact a party won a constituency seat in a recount, but due to the compensatory list vote this actually made the party lose a seat.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 22, 2011, 12:26:12 PM
Humour is all relative, you fascist fyckwits.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 22, 2011, 12:27:47 PM
Guys, can you all shut up, please?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 22, 2011, 12:34:04 PM
For the record, the post is about the fact a party won a constituency seat in a recount, but due to the compensatory list vote this actually made the party lose a seat.

Why does Germany always reward failure and punish success?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 22, 2011, 12:44:07 PM
()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 22, 2011, 01:05:10 PM
Save us from this tide of vulgar Post Modernism!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 22, 2011, 01:07:27 PM
I support deleting the last two pages of this thread and pretending they never happened.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 22, 2011, 01:09:49 PM
The Institute is burning :(

Save yourself. Forget about women and Jmfcts.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on September 22, 2011, 01:11:26 PM
I support deleting the last two pages of this thread and pretending they never happened.

then we first need to save the following:

A MacGyver type movie is like:  “Appears to be no one home….what’s this?  A small piece of paper with the letter Q on it?….what could Q stand for?...well…in 720AD the Queen of England had a niece named Quindline who drowned during a site seeing trip along the Nile…so we better check the boat dock right away!”


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 22, 2011, 01:45:31 PM
Do you realize most of "thread-jacking" is made of posts complaining about thread-jacking ?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 22, 2011, 01:48:59 PM
Do you realize most of "thread-jacking" is made of posts complaining about thread-jacking ?

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 22, 2011, 01:53:17 PM
Do you realize most of "thread-jacking" is made of posts complaining about thread-jacking ?

()

This certainly means something interesting and funny, but sadly I don't know what. :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 22, 2011, 01:56:44 PM
Do you realize most of "thread-jacking" is made of posts complaining about thread-jacking ?

()

This certainly means something interesting and funny, but sadly I don't know what. :(

You made a post complaining about the number of posts in the thread complaining about the threadjacking of the thread.

Thus, postmodernism.

Thus, Lyotard. Because he had a funnier face than Derrida.

Although there's always another option...

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on September 22, 2011, 05:12:28 PM
Check out Naso's sig.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 22, 2011, 05:19:09 PM
Postmodernism won't help you with girls.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 22, 2011, 06:00:28 PM
Postmodernism won't help you with girls.

False.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 22, 2011, 06:01:24 PM

If postmodernism never helped me, won't help anyone else.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 22, 2011, 06:02:29 PM

Bitches love Thomas Pynchon.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 22, 2011, 06:05:16 PM

Then why are wasting your time here instead of getting laid thanks to Thomas Pynchon?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 22, 2011, 06:07:34 PM

Then why are wasting your time here instead of getting laid thanks to Thomas Pynchon?

There's something the warm glow of a county map displaying third party voting percentages provides that a woman could never hope to.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on September 22, 2011, 07:33:14 PM

I finally got my hands on a Thomas Pynchon book the other day. I think I'm gonna like it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 22, 2011, 08:25:02 PM
Let it live.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 22, 2011, 08:39:02 PM

Especially as it is absurd to think that a sudden outbreak of PoMo could ever kill a thread named after one of its living (if totally unknowing) embodiments.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: RI on September 22, 2011, 09:11:12 PM
We clearly need a meta-goldmine.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 23, 2011, 09:42:52 AM

As you wish

After my circumlocutory and exuberant thread on why I am fond of the 1980s, I now realize I should shed some light onto my tepid reminiscing of the 1990s.

Now this 20 second video tells you why I wish I could've lived in the 1980s:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8NMtQabci0&feature=related

Note my favorite President, and two of my favorite TV shows all on the same night! Of course, now you might get an Obama speech preempting a reality show showing a teenage girl get liposuction but that's for another epic thread at another time.

Before anyone can look back at the 1990s, you have to remember there were three parts to the decade.

The early 1990s were basically the start of a decade that ended with the 1980s. The Cold War was dwindling but still going on, Ronald Reagan had just left office leaving George Bush as his successor, and the "vibe" was still generally 80s.

()

Music was generally 80s-type rock being rehashed, but newer pop music was all the rage. "Hip-Hop" and "Rap" were around, but in general much of that still had a motown-type quality. For example, Boyz 2 Men had "It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday" and "End of the Road" while Mariah Carey rehashed the Jackson 5's "I'll Be There". From what I can remember circa 1991, Amy Grant was big on the radio, along with Phil Collins, and many one-hit wonders. For example, the film "Doc Hollywood" with Michael J. Fox brought the #1 one-hit wonder "The One and Only" that you're sure to recognize if you hear it. "Everything Changes" from 1992 is another example of the sounds of the early 1990s. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4C9AD1oyE30

Warning: If Keystone Phil clicks on the link, at approximately six seconds he will realize I am correct.

Styles were VERY much like the 1980s. Aviator sunglasses, big hair, all the fashion still met very well with the 80s styles. The early 1990s began as if the 80s had transformed into what the 1990s would be like.

The hit NBC show "L.A. Law", which aired between 1986 and 1994 epitomized the styles of the early 90s period with women's business suits and hairstyles that weren't quite the 80s but were...at the time...what it seemed the 1990s would be. Pantyhose was also all the rage more than ever.

()
Hose ad from 1990

Politics were different during the early 90s, too. Indeed, I read an article from TIME magazine from 1991 saying that with President Bush's high popularity, the 1990s would be the Bush Era just as the 1980s were the Reagan era. Little did we know Bill Clinton would end up being the President of the 90s.

()

Coming soon - The mid-90s: One Headlight



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on September 23, 2011, 10:48:57 AM
Only funny out of context:

Gary Johnson, just because he managed to expose himself.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on September 23, 2011, 03:00:36 PM

I finally got my hands on a Thomas Pynchon book the other day. I think I'm gonna like it.

Which one? I really, really love Pynchon (,even if I'm not that big on the whole ridiculous atmosphere that can surround his persona at times or the awfully pathetic fanboyism of some of his admirers.). V. is probably the best entry into his oeuvre as it both shows flashes of Pynchon at his best as well as being a great preparation for the glorious delights that is Gravity's Rainbow, and I say this as someone who personally would consider Against The Day to be the peak of Pynchon's craft.

The whole California-cycle (Vineland, Inherent Vice, maybe even The Crying of Lot 49 )of novels is less my thing, though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 23, 2011, 06:33:11 PM
Context:

No, but it's almost certain that his mother was wearing pantyhose on the night he walked in on his parents having sex to an 80s dance tune.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 23, 2011, 07:24:37 PM
No, but it's almost certain that his mother was wearing pantyhose on the night he walked in on his parents having sex to an 80s dance tune.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 23, 2011, 07:26:38 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 23, 2011, 07:44:54 PM
No, but it's almost certain that his mother was wearing pantyhose on the night he walked in on his parents having sex to an 80s dance tune.

Phil disrespects Naso's momma!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: courts on September 23, 2011, 08:28:50 PM
Sounds to me like the teacher is a homo and wants to force his warped lifestyle on the schoolchildren.  Good for the boy for standing up against the gay mafia, even if his name is Dakota.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Sbane on September 23, 2011, 09:48:43 PM
Both of those quotes aren't from Phil!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 23, 2011, 11:09:36 PM
there's only two things that come out of Oklahoma...

Sir, you are no Louis Gossett, Jr. (And I'm certainly not Richard Gere.)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 24, 2011, 01:36:47 PM
Rick Perry can only be executed once, and that isn't very likely.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 24, 2011, 01:45:40 PM
My mother is a great gal. To answer your question, it's no.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 24, 2011, 01:53:22 PM
Both of those quotes aren't from Phil!

Thanks for destroying the joke, Einstein.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 24, 2011, 04:11:40 PM
Oh those persecuted Christians! 

I saw a picture of a sign that was really cute.

"Religion is like a penis.  It's nice to have one.  It's alright to be proud of it.  But please don't whip it out in public and show it to everybody and please, by all means, do not try to shove it down my childrens' throats."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Sbane on September 24, 2011, 05:23:38 PM
Both of those quotes aren't from Phil!

Thanks for destroying the joke, Einstein.

Blubb's act was obviously funny, you saying it was Phil was certainly not funny. I just thought you got confused again.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on September 25, 2011, 12:04:05 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 25, 2011, 11:05:18 AM

So, Naso is a son of Fawn Hall?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 26, 2011, 12:32:13 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 27, 2011, 12:21:11 AM
On Halloween night 94, I dressed up as a: ghost.

I'm not sure how I feel knowing that Naso was dressed as a ghost the day I was born.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 27, 2011, 03:24:33 PM

Whoa, you're right!  He totally looks French.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 27, 2011, 06:40:44 PM
I wish I was cool enough for the Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 27, 2011, 06:57:24 PM
I wish I was cool enough for the Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy :(

Crying about it certainly won't bring you some humor, child.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 27, 2011, 07:12:54 PM
I wish I was cool enough for the Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy :(

Crying about it certainly won't bring you some humor, child.

Goddammit...I was hoping it would bring me a zebra...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 27, 2011, 09:05:04 PM
A few months from now:

BREAKING: MICHELLE BACHMANN WINS IOWA CAUCUS

Bachmann - 29.6%
Paul - 35.8%
Perry - 18.16%
Romney - 15.2%
Other - 1.24


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 28, 2011, 12:49:38 AM
How does one "look French", exactly?

Well, let's discuss why the others aren't French, to give you some background.

Michele Bachmann, despite having a name that would serve well in Strasbourg, has big hair. Big hair  post-1970 is un-French.

Herman Cain is black. Black people are un-French.

Newt Gingrich has incredibly good teeth for his age. Good teeth are un-French.

Rudy Giuliani is incredibly French on the surface, but unlike a true Frenchman he prefers to divorce and remarry rather than maintain mistresses.

Jon Huntsman is weedy, but doesn't have a moustache. Weediness without a moustache is un-French.

Gary Johnson looks French.

Sarah Palin can see Russia from her house. La Russie is extremely un-French.

Ron Paul dyes his eyebrows. Dyed eyebrows are French, but only on women.

Rick Perry is Texan. Texans are un-French. They don't even eat cheese unless it has a Mexican name.

Rick Santorum never surrenders despite the impossibility that someone of such low moral rectitude could win the primary. This is very un-French; there he'd either surrender or get elected.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 28, 2011, 01:42:22 AM
Jesus H. Christ, he's taking longer to make up his mind than it takes him to climb a flight of stairs.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 28, 2011, 08:48:52 PM
Dixieland will hold the nose and vote for a n against that damn Mormon Yankee!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 29, 2011, 08:45:57 AM
The FDP's current main priority is getting more than 5% in Schleswig-Holstein next May. If they have to destroy the global economy to achieve this, so be it. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 29, 2011, 09:38:37 AM
Third option: the penalty for first-degree murder should be gay marriage with no possibility of divorce. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on September 29, 2011, 10:13:20 AM
Quote
"Not sure if he saw the movie?"

Mitt Romney, quoted by Politico, on David Axelrod's comment that Obama's re-election was going to be a "titanic struggle."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 30, 2011, 06:09:40 AM

::)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on September 30, 2011, 09:06:38 AM
srly stop it


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on September 30, 2011, 09:37:31 AM
http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/09/29/us-bristolpalin-idUSTRE78S69L20110929

In case you haven't seen the video, the guy went off on Bristol about her mom. The guy is a 47 year old gay man.

During the confrontation, which occurred while Palin was filming for her upcoming reality series for BIO, Bristol asked Hanks if he disliked Sarah because he's gay.

"Is it because you're a homosexual? …that's why you hate her?" Palin asked.

When Hanks asked Palin how she knew he was gay, Palin replied, "Because I can tell you are."


()

Maybe he's mad because America has decided they don't want to change the definition of marriage...




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 30, 2011, 11:54:40 AM
please gather some info before posting....


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 01, 2011, 10:01:01 AM
The boy broke his left arm Friday.  The radius, to be exact, which is the larger of the two long bones in the lower arm.  His school called me in my office around 12:30 and said he was on the playground just after lunch and was going across that thing where you climb up a ladder and make it across using your hands.  (modular overhead challenge for building upper-body strength)  Apparently he'd gone across it several times.  One too many, I suppose.  Usually, when he gets tired, he just drops to his feet, and they have this thick foam rubber pad under it, so it's not a problem, but I guess he was in mid-swing or something and landed on his left arm.  Anyway, so I got on my bicycle and dashed home, got the car, drove the three blocks to his school and picked him up and called the nurses station at his pediatrician and she said to give him 10 mL ibuprofen suspension and take him to be X-rayed. 

I thought about taking him to the nearest hospital emergency entrance, but figured we'd be better off at the clinic nearby.  It turned out to be a good decision.  They have X-ray capability there, and clearly his radius was broken.  And both the GP who initially saw him and the orthopedic surgeon were older guys, which is always best, and it wasn't very busy, so there was no wait.  And the nurses were mostly old as well.  He had a good attitude about the whole thing, surprisingly, and wasn't crying.  Even wanted to play with the Megablocks in the waiting room, while we waited for the X-ray technician to input the files into the system, but he was using his right hand and his teeth to put them together and I was worried about all the snotty children who'd played with them before him, so I made him stop.  Anyway, once the orthopedic surgeon started to manipulate his arm he started wailing.  So they said they could do a total anasthetic or a shot of lidocaine in the arm.  We opted for the lidocaine.  After that, he went numb, kept grabbing his left thumb and saying that it "feels like somebody else's thumb" and all that.  But he and the nurse tortured it and got it all straight, so they were able to set it without operating inside, which is good.  And the post procedure X-rays showed that it was very straight.  All in all, it seems to be a good alignment job.

Nowadays, they let you choose your cast color.  He chose red, of course.  Everything is red.  When we see the balloon man he wants a red sword or a red hat, and when he gets a new bicycle he wants red.  Always red.  Ah, well, my last two cars were red.  Maybe it runs in the family.  Anyway, there was only one color cast when I was 6.  It was white.  You could color it, paint it, get your chums to sign it, but when you left the clinic it was white. 

Also, they don't have a regular X-ray on a plastic sheet that you can photocopy anymore.  It's just an image on a screen.  A centralized system so you could look at it on any computer in any facility in the Wheaton-Saint francis system, but when I asked for a photocopy of the X-ray to show my wife, they said that they don't have a convenient way to print it out, so I ended up having to use my mobile phone to photograph them so I could show her.  I ended up calling her around 3:30 after they finished the cast.  I'd avoided worrying her as long as I could, as I knew she had meetings that afternoon and I didn't, and there's wasn't much she could do except worry.  She was edgy and pretty hard to get along with for about 24 hours, as I expected, but seems to be relaxed now.  Luckily this happened on a Friday, so he could stay high on painkillers for the first couple of days, and so we could use the weekend shopping for shirts that had arm-holes large enough to admit the cast but small enough so they wouldn't hang down to his knees.  Not an easy thing to find, by the way. 

We go for a follow-up exam and X-ray at one week.  And, if all is going well, the cast will be on for 4 weeks. No soccer, no swimming, and no bicycle during that time.  What a drag.  And, no piano for at least a week.  I'll have to call his teacher and cancel the next lesson or two.  He may or may not need a smaller, shorter forearm-only cast for a couple of weeks when this one comes off, but I'm told that the short one will be waterproof so we can start taking him back to the big pool.  We're making him drink lots of Calcium- and Vitamin C-fortified orange juice, and eat lots of tofu, meat, calcium pills, mango, brocolli, blueberry muffins, yogurt, and whatever we can find that has lots of Vitamin C and citrate/phosphate salts of calcium ions.  And a fair bit of codeine for the first couple of days to help with the pain and itching.  We're trying to go easy on that though.

Anyway, on the way home from the orthopedists, he says, "why did the dinosaur cross the road?"  And I think for a while and tried to come up with something clever.  He tells lots of corny jokes now so I'm used to it.  Finally, I say, "why did the dinosaur cross the road?"  And he says, "Because the chicken hadn't evolved yet!"  He was quite proud of that one.  "Get it?  Get it, Daddy?  The chicken is a bird, so it is the descendant of some Triassic reptile who gave rise to all ornithischian dinosaurs as well as birds."  Okay, I'm probably paraphrasing a bit.

But the jokes are becoming a bit more sophisticated.  He's also into word play now.  Lots of bad puns.  And, of course jokes about farts and pee are always a hit. 

It all put me in the mood for another Roberto Rosellini movie.  After all, I knew we wouldn't be going out much this weekend, and I should get some inside entertainment for all of us.  I ended up getting Era Notte a Roma.  It features a very attractive 25-year-old Giovanna Ralli in a prominent roll as Esperia, who at first seems to be a young nun, but is later revealed to be a black-market supplier of goods to the Romans.  She finds it easier to move about in the countryside, procuring prosciutto, wine, medicine, and other goods dressed as a nun, and a very pretty one at that.  The film was a weird combination of neo-realism and didactic, with a good measure of melodrama thrown in for good measure.  Fall 1943.  Three escaped prisoners, one US, one UK, and one Russian, make their way into hiding in Esperia's attic, and much of the action takes place there.  The buxsome young hostess can't speak English and the soldiers can't speak Italian.  The Russian is the loneliest of all, as he can speak neither Italian nor English.  There's much focus on how folks communicate with each other when they can't speak one another's language.  It's all pretty believable, but confusing when the scene goes from that attic to the house of a prince where they hide after Esperia is captured and tortured.  Definitely interesting, but somewhat hard to follow at times. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 01, 2011, 10:17:53 AM
This is the most tl,dr-ish post I've ever seen...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on October 01, 2011, 11:40:58 AM
Read it, is good n shet.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 01, 2011, 11:44:10 AM
Yeah, I can rarely make it past the first paragraph of any of angus' posts at the best of times.  The reward doesn't justify the effort put in.  There's no way I'm scaling that wall o' text.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Holmes on October 01, 2011, 02:33:43 PM
Print it and read it while you're on the can.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 01, 2011, 06:08:22 PM
I sat and read every word of Angus's post.

It was the best decision I've ever made.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 01, 2011, 07:14:49 PM
My favorite part was about the cast color.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 01, 2011, 08:18:03 PM

Oh God same I laughed so hard.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 01, 2011, 10:36:13 PM
homecoming tonight...daughter went to dance in a limo with a bunch of other girls...wife and I spent couple hours with all the parents and had snacks and drinks....here is a pic, two of our daughters arent too hard to pick out

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 02, 2011, 10:49:25 AM
Why is Dalton McGuinty nicknamed 'Dad' by the way?

I think it's because he's seen as being paternalistic.

Anyway, here's a picture of him when he was younger:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on October 02, 2011, 12:13:27 PM
::)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 02, 2011, 02:28:45 PM

^^^^


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on October 02, 2011, 09:55:36 PM
srly guys it's not funny any moar :o :p :/ :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 03, 2011, 12:34:52 AM
This thread has been even more amusing than I had hoped, and jmfcst hasn't even arrived yet.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on October 03, 2011, 01:52:23 AM
homecoming tonight...daughter went to dance in a limo with a bunch of other girls...wife and I spent couple hours with all the parents and had snacks and drinks....here is a pic, two of our daughters arent too hard to pick out

()

No, the funny bit was this:

Look at all of those potential Herman Cain supporters!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 03, 2011, 08:24:12 AM
WEINBACH AND THE PRESIDENT SIT IN THE OVAL OFFICE THE FOLLOWING DAY. A MAN WALKS IN. WHITE HAIR, BLACK SUIT, SERIOUS LOOK ON HIS FACE.

Brooks: Dr. Weinbach, this is Mr. X.
Weinbach: Mr. X, huh?
Brooks: That's right, Mr. X. Now X is here to help assure that your attempt does not go without merit. As we know, you've never served in the U.S. Military, and you've never been trained in any battle techniques or weaponry.
Weinbach: Yes, sir that's correct.
Brooks: You will return, but you will return armed. This is a Beretta 93R, sub-machine handgun. 32 rounds in just a couple seconds.
Weinbach: Sir, I don't know how to use a gun.
Brooks: Well let's hope you don't have to. But...IF YOU DO...you point and shoot. Pretty simple.

MR. X PULLS OUT A BOX WITH ANOTHER GUN IN IT.

Brooks: Ahhh...here we are. A Smith and Wesson .357 revolver. Snub-nose style. It'll be attached to your ankle. Six shots. Simple.
Weinbach: Mr. President, Mr. X....um...why the precautions? I'm going to 1384.
Brooks: So what? You will have weapons that help ensure yours and Molly's safety. We'll pack you full of water, MREs, ammo, weapons...all the tools you need.
Weinbach: If you insist, sir.
Brooks: Now, we have to get you down to the laboratory right away. Let's get this show on the road.

SCENE SHIFTS TO WEINBACH AND BROOKS IN THE LABORATORY. WEINBACH, IN BULLETPROOF VEST, BACKPACK ON WITH SUPPLIES AND WEAPONS, STEPS INTO THE MACHINE.

Brooks: Newt...are you SURE you want to do this?
Weinbach: Mr. President, I must do it. I am sure.
Brooks: Look...I...is there anybody you'd like me to contact for you?
Weinbach: Nah...never had much of a family.
Brooks: (nods somberly) God speed, Newt.
Weinbach: Thank you, Mr. President.
Brooks: (shakes his head) Nah...nah...the name's Austin.
Weinbach: (smiles) Thanks, Austin.
Brooks: You bet, Newt.

WEINBACH STEPS INTO THE MACHINE. PRESIDENT BROOKS PUTS ON THE EYE GOGGLES AND SALUTES DR. WEINBACH. WEINBACH RETURNS A SALUTE BACK TO THE PRESIDENT. THE MACHINE SPHERES BEGIN SPINNING....THEN A TREMENDOUS BURST OF LIGHT ENERGY. WEINBACH IS GONE.

WEINBACH SLAMS INTO THE PAVEMENT. HE IS BEWILDERED, BUT SURPRISINGLY ALERT. HIS BACKPACK HELPS TO BREAK HIS FALL. HE LOOKS AROUND. A GRAY OVERCAST DAY. APPEARS TO BE MID-AFTERNOON. HE HEARS YELLING IN THE BACKGROUND. HE STANDS UP AND BEGINS LOOKING AROUND. HE CAN'T SEE ANYBODY. HE FEELS ALONE. HE IS ALONE. HE BEGINS SCREAMING OUT.


Weinbach: MOLLY! MOLLY CALLOW! DR. MOLLY CALLOW!

A MAN IN A UNIFORM APPROACHES.

Weinbach: SIR! SIR...I'm looking for a friend, I have this photograph-

THE MAN IN THE UNIFORM PUNCHES WEINBACH TO THE GROUND.

Uniform Man: AUF! AUF! Jetzt hund!
Weinbach: I'm...I'm looking for my friend, Mr. Molly Callow!
Uniform Man: Halt die Schnauze! Halt die Schnauze!

THE UNIFORMED MAN KICKS WEINBACH AGAIN.

Weinbach: I'm Dr. Weinbach...I'm a friend of Dr. Callow. Weinbach.
Uniform Man: Ein Jude? Ein verfluchter Jude!?

THE MAN GRABS DR. WEINBACH BY HIS HAIR AND DRAGS HIM IN THE STREET TOWARDS A GROUP OF TWO OTHER UNIFORMED MEN, STANDING, SMOKING CIGARETTES HOLDING WEAPONS.

Uniform Man: Schauen Sie, was ich Männer… ein verfluchter Jude fand!

THE MEN LAUGH. ONE MAN SCREAMS AT WEINBACH.

Uniform Man #2: Auf Ihren Füßen! Auf Ihren Füßen!!
Weinbach: (yelling back) I--I don't understand!

THE MAN PULLS WEINBACH UP ON HIS FEET BY HIS HAIR AND YANKS OFF HIS BACKPACK. TWO MEN OPEN IT AND BEGIN RUMMAGING THROUGH IT. THE ORIGINAL MAN STANDS, LOOKING ANGRY AND DISGUSTED AT WEINBACH.

Uniform Man #3: Waffen!
Uniform Man: Waffen?
Uniform Man #2: Der verfluchte Jude hat Waffen!

THE MEN BEGIN BEATING WEINBACH. HE YELLS OUT FOR THEM TO STOP BUT TO NO AVAIL.

Uniform Man: ALBRECHT! KLAUS! Nehmen Sie den Jude zur Gasse und töten ihn!

THE MEN GRAB WEINBACH BY HIS ARMS AND DRAG HIM DOWN THE SECLUDED STREET. THEY DRAG HIM TO THE BACKWAY OF AN ALLEY. HE GETS ON HIS KNEES FACING THE UNIFORMED MEN. ONE MAN WALKS TO THE EDGE OF THE ALLEYWAY, THE OTHER POINTS HIS RIFLE AT WEINBACH. WEINBACH REALIZES HE IS ABOUT TO DIE. HE CRIES OUT FOR MERCY. THE UNIFORMED MAN BEGINS LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY.

Uniformed Man #2: (laughing) ALBRECHT! Der Jude wünscht seine Mamma!
Uniformed Man #3: (laughs) Töten Sie einfach den verfluchten Juden, Klaus. Wir haben nicht den ganzen Tag!

WEINBACH REACHES UNDERNEATH HIS PANTS AND FEELS HIS .357 REVOLVER. HE LOOKS AT THE UNIFORMED MAN. THE MAN'S LAUGHING. HEAD LEANED BACK LAUGHING. RIFLE IN HIS HANDS. WEINBACH TURNS HIS HEAD AND SEES THE OTHER UNIFORMED MAN AT THE END OF THE ALLEY LIGHTING A CIGARETTE. WEINBACH'S EYE FILL WITH RAGE AS HE TURNS BACK TOWARDS THE LAUGHING MAN WITH THE RIFLE. HE SWIPES OUT THE REVOLVER FROM HIS ANKLE AND YANKS BACK ON THE TRIGGER. A BULLET GOES RIGHT INTO THE CHEST OF THE UNIFORMED MAN. WEINBACH GRABS THE RIFLE, AND TURNS TOWARDS THE SECOND MAN, WHO DROPS HIS CIGARETTE IN DISBELIEF AND REACTS BY SLINGING HIS RIFLE TOWARDS WEINBACH. WEINBACH SHOOTS THE RIFLE ONCE, THE BULLET GOING STRAIGHT THROUGH THE HEAD OF THE SECOND UNIFORMED MAN. WEINBACH PAUSES...HIS EYES FILLED WITH TEARS OF RAGE...HE HAS NEVER KILLED BEFORE. HE HEARS MUMBLING. HE LOOKS DOWN TO SEE THE BLEEDING MAN IN THE UNIFORM.

Uniformed Man #2: (whispering then getting louder) Sie haven' t gewonnen, Jude. Alle Juden brennen in der Hölle. Hören Sie mich? HÖLLE! JUDE! VERFLUCHTER JUDE! VERFLUCHTER JUDE!!!

WEINBACH SHOOTS WITH THE REVOLVER STRAIGHT THROUGH THE MAN'S HEAD. HE SLINGS THE RIFLE AROUND HIS SHOULDER AND HOLDS HIS STILL SMOKING REVOLVER IN HIS HAND. HE WALKS OUT OF THE ALLEY AND SEES THE FIRST UNIFORMED MAN STANDING THERE, STILL GOING THROUGH WEINBACH'S BACKPACK. WEINBACH CAREFULLY AND QUIETLY WALKS ALONG THE CORRIDOR OF BRICK BUILDINGS. HE APPROACHES THE MAN FROM BEHIND. HE PUTS THE GUN TO THE MAN'S HEAD AND COCKS THE HAMMER BACK.

Weinbach: Turn around. TURN AROUND!

THE MAN TURNS AROUND.

Uniformed Man: Verfluchter Jude.

WEINBACH, POINTING REVOLVER IN THE MAN'S FACE SCREAMS AT HIM.

Weinbach: ENGLISH! SPEAK ENGLISH MOTHERER!!

WEINBACH PISTOL WHIPS THE MAN, WHO FALLS TO HIS KNEES.

Weinbach: ENGLISH! ENGLISH!
Uniformed Man: Uh...uh...don't shoot! Don't shoot!
Weinbach: WHAT YEAR IS IT?! TELL ME!
Uniformed Man: Warum? Warum?

WEINBACH PISTOL WHIPS THE MAN AGAIN!

Weinbach: TELL ME! TELL ME WHAT YEAR IT IS!
Uniformed Man: Uh...uh...1944. June 8, 1944.

WEINBACH IS STUNNED.  THE UNIFORMED MAN SLINGS HIS RIFLE AROUND.

Uniformed Man: STERBEN JUDE! STERBEN JUDE!

WEINBACH, SLOW TO REACT, YANKS THE TRIGGER THREE TIMES. THE MAN FALLS TO THE GROUND, DEAD. ONE RIFLE SHOT GOES OFF IN THE AIR AS HE FALLS DOWN. WEINBACH COLLAPSES TO THE GROUND, GUN STILL SMOKING HIS HIS SHAKING HANDS. HE IS SUDDENLY COMING TO THE REALIZATION THAT MOLLY NEVER MADE IT TO 1348. SHE TRAVELED BACK TO 1944...AND WEINBACH HAS NO IDEA WHERE AND HOW TO FIND HER.

TO BE CONTINUED...



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 03, 2011, 08:25:23 AM
This is probably the best bit of the above:

Quote
WEINBACH REACHES UNDERNEATH HIS PANTS AND FEELS HIS .357 REVOLVER


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 03, 2011, 08:32:46 AM
Al, you're just mad because of your old saggy balls.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 03, 2011, 08:37:13 AM
Al, you're just mad because of your old saggy balls.

It is difficult to deny such a charge.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 03, 2011, 02:59:20 PM
This thread is the worst goddamn retarded display of male masculinity and sexual insecurity I've seen in decades.

Bar none.

Mechaman 4 Supreme Dictator.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 03, 2011, 03:01:56 PM
agreed, this is a non-starter....Cain has to win over the women of the GOP.  If he does that, nothing is going to stop him.

You know what they say...those women will never go back.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 03, 2011, 03:08:58 PM
This thread is the worst goddamn retarded display of male masculinity and sexual insecurity I've seen in decades.

Bar none.

Mechaman 4 Supreme Dictator.

He's already Governor General of Oklahoma for Life (I appointed him back in 2009, but I guess he's still to kick that whole Mary Fallin out).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on October 03, 2011, 09:35:55 PM
Visiting the Capitol for the first time earlier today:

()

That's an impressively large white dome; filled with conflicting ideologies, partisan hackery, delusions of grandeur, and an awful lot of hot air.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Smid on October 03, 2011, 09:45:35 PM
NWT election is in full swing.

A Non-Partisan Independent has been elected. Also, A Non-Partisan Independent has been elected. Also, A Non-Partisan Independent has been elected. There's one riding where A Non-Partisan Independent is running against A Non-Partisan Independent is running against A Non-Partisan Independent. I predict the Non-Partisan Independent will win.

For context, Northwest Territories has a non-partisan parliament.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on October 03, 2011, 11:04:02 PM

Why don't you call him Congressman Paul or Representative Paul?

He can't spell those.

Which is hilarious in itself, but it gets better with:


Why don't you call him Congressman Paul or Representative Paul?

He can't spell those.

Yes I can. I just choose to call him Dr. Paul.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 04, 2011, 02:42:47 AM
I'm firmly convinced I've not met a Liberal that actually knows what the definition of Fascism is.

And this post only further confirms that for me.

Being a fascist, you would say that, wouldn't you?

...and...

Really? You are pretty pathetic aren't you?

Again I don't think you have a clue as to what that actually means except that you've heard others use it so why not.

This is exactly the sort of behavior that I would expect from a fascist.

...and...

This is exactly the sort of behavior that I would expect from someone that doesn't even know what that term means.

Do you often fall into sarchasms?

Do you often use whatever statements and questions you can to duck the fact that you don't know something?

Possibly, maybe, I suppose so, on occasion, on a fair day, when the wind is blowing from across the Straits, before noon or after seven, but never on a Sunday.


I <3 Al. :D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 04, 2011, 09:50:25 AM
Keep an eye on this one:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=141702.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 04, 2011, 10:56:23 AM
That's grade A classic Naso similar to circa 2007.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on October 04, 2011, 11:10:15 AM
That's grade A classic Naso similar to circa 2007.

Classic Naso was late 2004-2005.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on October 04, 2011, 12:57:22 PM
Naso has and always will be Classic Naso.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on October 04, 2011, 01:01:07 PM
Naso has and always will be Classic Naso.

true, and any attempt to define Naso as a function of time would mean you've gone way beyond the point of no return within the Realm of Naso.  Better to simply to take quick glances from a safe distance.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 04, 2011, 05:15:34 PM
but the American people are hurting...heck, even my wife is complaining...

Get a divorce. You'll feel much better.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on October 04, 2011, 10:06:44 PM
The next thread should ask when is it appropriate to start decorating for Christmas?  The answer to that question for me is between October 1 and December 1.  I am putting mine up this year next Saturday, October 15. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on October 06, 2011, 10:39:22 AM
You know the rules about quoting obscene material.  I'm not sure why the others didn't get points, but it doesn't really matter.  If you want to whine, please send one of us a PM instead of complaining about it here.  Continuing to misuse this forum is just going to get you more infraction points.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 07, 2011, 06:47:45 AM
We're used to such lows from wormyguy that when there is an even barely funny post we can't not report it.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on October 08, 2011, 07:39:16 AM
Here is this week's Mitt Romney - National Security Romney


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on October 08, 2011, 09:08:36 AM
I'm voting Freedom Fighter just to spite you and your plan.

Yeah, I did too.  (In case that wasn't clear earlier.)

I'd concluded also that it was some sort of sociological experiment, because I can assume that snowguy knows that if one only wants attention there are better ways.  For example, one can post a seven- or eight-paragraph response in the middle of a serous thread wherein one appears to begin answering the question, but in reality is using the question only to segueway into a diatribe regarding his personal experiences, straying so far off topic that the attention whore appears to forget the original question, but actually the original question is only relevant to the attention whore as a device that unintentionally reminds him of something personal. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Torie on October 08, 2011, 11:24:00 AM
.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 08, 2011, 11:36:10 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=141955.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 08, 2011, 01:19:17 PM
You need to delete the Wilson stamp Kal. Yes, Wilson was a racist, but he's still hated in certain quarters. He's the one that really kick started the government taking over everything, and stealing our money big time, and creating a fiat currency scam. He's basically a traitor. Do you ever listen to Glen Beck?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Smash255 on October 08, 2011, 10:26:33 PM
What happened to the thread from earlier?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on October 10, 2011, 11:55:14 AM

Well, the blue avatar certainly suggests you are.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 10, 2011, 02:50:37 PM
Poor guy.

Conclusion:

Stop talking about Hinduism and Buddhism and ban MD90


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on October 10, 2011, 03:08:10 PM

                                                   that moving type feature is fun, isn't it?



My moving text is faster than your moving text. RAWN PAWL 2012

                                           
Oh hey, I wonder if pictures can move with text too
()

HONK HONK ITS A CONVOY


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 10, 2011, 07:21:22 PM
Did you really just use Peter Davies and normality in the same sentence?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 11, 2011, 10:43:49 AM
Not sure if this has been posted already...


()

I'm pretty sure you lol'd just as much at graphics pointing out all the public property at Tea Party rallies.

...how do Tea Parties hypocritically use public property? If you want to call them out for hypocrisy on unemployment benefits and stuff like that, fine but using public property is different than the Invaders complaining about corporate greed while supporting it when they don't have to.

King, you make stupid "points." It's part of your routine. But even that one was a little much.

I think some Red avatar "informed" me here that only 500 sociology majors would do things like this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on October 11, 2011, 11:07:16 AM
?

I stand by my point. I'm pretty sure he lol'd just as much. Everything Phil implied into that post was not me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 11, 2011, 11:09:15 AM
Actually I was referring to rocket's comment, which falls into the "funny because it's true category"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 12, 2011, 03:12:53 AM
Imagine The Professor as one of Rochambeau's professors!

"Google Image Searching for pictures of hot guys won't help you get girls."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on October 12, 2011, 06:38:34 PM
Here is a post from the thread for a reported post, wherein a moderator gives his reason for not infracting as requested by the complainant.  Quote has been edited to protect the guilty.

No. This is a mindbogglingly stupid argument and all too typical of XXXXXXXX. But arguments one believes are stupid are no reason to infract or ban.

Otherwise we'd lose over 90% of our YYYYYYYYY.

<stares into space with a dreamy smile, envisioning such a world>

AHEM! But seriously, no.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 12, 2011, 06:45:30 PM
Here is a post from the thread for a reported post, wherein a moderator gives his reason for not infracting as requested by the complainant.  Quote has been edited to protect the guilty.

No. This is a mindbogglingly stupid argument and all too typical of XXXXXXXX. But arguments one believes are stupid are no reason to infract or ban.

Otherwise we'd lose over 90% of our YYYYYYYYY.

<stares into space with a dreamy smile, envisioning such a world>

AHEM! But seriously, no.

This is brilliant.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 12, 2011, 07:03:29 PM

This is not preceding poster's signature thread, dude.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 12, 2011, 07:04:03 PM

I just noticed that. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 13, 2011, 02:14:07 AM
I love how even with Ernest's masking it's quite obvious.

XXXXXXXX = wormyguy
YYYYYYYYY = libertarians


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 13, 2011, 02:27:01 AM
Good job, BRTD.  (Holy sh-t, did I just type that?)  Though it was "Paultards" rather than libertarians.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on October 13, 2011, 04:19:02 AM
I think that belongs here:


:)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 13, 2011, 04:27:36 AM
LOL. When I saw this I first thought about Massachusetts. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CARLHAYDEN on October 13, 2011, 05:15:14 AM
Here is a post from the thread for a reported post, wherein a moderator gives his reason for not infracting as requested by the complainant.  Quote has been edited to protect the guilty.

No. This is a mindbogglingly stupid argument and all too typical of XXXXXXXX. But arguments one believes are stupid are no reason to infract or ban.

Otherwise we'd lose over 90% of our YYYYYYYYY.

<stares into space with a dreamy smile, envisioning such a world>

AHEM! But seriously, no.

Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 13, 2011, 08:57:03 AM
LOL. When I saw this I first thought about Massachusetts. :P

Lol, me too.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on October 13, 2011, 11:38:54 AM
I thought of the Koopa Troopa turtle from Mario.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 13, 2011, 12:42:20 PM
Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.

Is there no limit to the extent of CARL's ability to self-fail?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on October 13, 2011, 06:00:55 PM
Well, at least now the "Romney can't get over 25%, blah blah blah" argument can be put to rest.

To be replaced with the "Romney is losing to Herman Cain, hah hah hah" argument.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 13, 2011, 06:34:30 PM
Oh, King, I thought you're Mr. Morden :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 14, 2011, 03:08:10 PM
Income Tax
8% is what we take out of your first $50,000 of income
6% is added on to that rate on income from $50,000 to $300,000 (14%)
7% is added on after your first $300,000 (21%)

Value-Added Sales Tax
5% on items purchased by individuals greater than $1000 plus alcohol, tobacco, and marijuana
3% on items purchased by individuals from $0.01 to $999.99 that could not be classified as:
0% on items that could be purchased with food stamps (groceries)

Corporate Tax
9% flat on corporate revenues




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on October 15, 2011, 06:01:33 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on October 15, 2011, 07:04:12 AM
Secretly recorded videos of Herman Cain writing the 999 plan upside-down while looking intently at a ouija board?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on October 15, 2011, 07:07:58 PM
I forgot about the Mexico Mitt.   When Romney wins in a 400+ electoral landslide in 2012, it was because people are yearning to vote for America's first Hispanic-American, Mormon-American, and Beautiful-American combined.  Romney makes John Edwards look like a hobo.

And you know what else?  Romney's upcoming landslide will be so huge, he might carry Mexico!

George Romney should have asked to get in-state tuition in Texas schools.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 16, 2011, 12:15:34 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on October 16, 2011, 07:56:00 PM
The juxtaposition here is hilarious:

I haven't heard of most of these shows.  Who watches this crap?

Only ones I watch:

Big Bang Theory (R - OMG I love this show!)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 17, 2011, 09:47:10 PM
Madigas in AP used to destroy items of their posession that a Brahmin had touched. And if a Brahman had for whatever reasons felt forced to enter the Madiga colony, they performed cleansing rituals after he'd left.
In short, they practiced untouchability on those dirty polluted Brahmins.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on October 18, 2011, 02:15:48 PM
Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.

Is there no limit to the extent of CARL's ability to self-fail?
Well, actually CH is right for once (although pedantic).
If you look at the quote that was redacted, it was apparently posted in 1969.

Uhm, that wasn't why CARL's post was such a fail.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on October 18, 2011, 02:29:14 PM

I'm deeply disappointed.  I clicked here expecting something like this:


()





Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on October 18, 2011, 03:16:15 PM
Is sofaken trying too hard here to be a gimmick poster?

I never thought I'd say this--because I am no racist--but it's about time my man Mitt played real dirty against this black intruder.  I know it goes against his Mormon faith, but may I suggest TEAM ROMNEY do what George W. Bush did to John MCcain in 2000...Mitt should place anonymous flyers and do up some robocalls implying that Herman Cain once fathered a black daughter. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 18, 2011, 10:27:47 PM
Posting yourself into the goldmine is, of course, an excellent example of a different kind of masturbation.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on October 18, 2011, 10:28:44 PM
Opebo just ended his reign as a comic genius by posting one of his own works in the Institute.


Posting yourself into the goldmine is, of course, an excellent example of a different kind of masturbation.

Never refer to this as a mine again, caveman.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 18, 2011, 10:29:19 PM
my wife started lecturing me about how rock music is bad for the boy.  

Good lord man she sounds insufferable.  Where does she keep your marbles?  On the mantle-piece? In her hand bag?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 18, 2011, 10:30:33 PM
Opebo just ended his reign as a comic genius by posting one of his own works in the Institute.

Perhaps he has a sock and accidently posted it under the wrong name?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 18, 2011, 10:31:56 PM
Human rights, obviously, Al.  I'm curious, are you anatomically correct?

How nice to hear that you care about those now. As for your question, I think so, yes. I do have (proportionately) small hands and feet though. You?

Well, no.. rather the converse proportions prevail in my case, Al, but it wasn't the size of your dear parts I was getting at, but rather whether they existed at all.  You do realize that most male humans do masturbate, and that looking at a pretty picture or an interesting fillum can aid in this healthful and necessary practice?

Now opebo can delete his.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 18, 2011, 10:32:56 PM
Never refer to this as a mine again, caveman.

Don't they live in caves on Sicily?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on October 18, 2011, 10:39:23 PM
Posting yourself into the goldmine is, of course, an excellent example of a different kind of masturbation.

That is true, Al, but I have no shame.  And anyway I wanted to preserve that tidbit about your parts.  Can you really blame me?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on October 18, 2011, 10:41:43 PM
Opebo just ended his reign as a comic genius by posting one of his own works in the Institute.

Perhaps he has a sock and accidently posted it under the wrong name?

No, I've done before several times anyway.  KP you old stick-in-the-mud - you must admit it was a funny.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on October 18, 2011, 10:57:31 PM
Never refer to this as a mine again, caveman.

Don't they live in caves on Sicily?

Al, your jealousy is showing.

Take this out of the Institute or be expelled.




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 19, 2011, 12:07:30 AM
Everyone, please! The Institute is no place for pointless unfunny bickering. Here, let's discuss this sublime work of art:

Question


Why do all these people say that "Israel is our greatest ally"?


Answer



If there was a question on a test I gave and you answered by first writing "Question" and repeating the question I just gave you and then writing "Answer" and stealing off someone else, do you know what I would do to you? I would flunk you, that's what I would do to you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 19, 2011, 12:09:19 AM
We should just have an RSS bot that automatically posts every Professor in here.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 19, 2011, 03:27:28 AM
We should just have an RSS bot that automatically posts every Professor in here.

Very true.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CARLHAYDEN on October 19, 2011, 03:37:19 AM
Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.

Is there no limit to the extent of CARL's ability to self-fail?

So Joe, do you believe this forum and/or the internet existed in 1969?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 19, 2011, 03:59:43 AM
Once again you completely missed the point, CARL, but nice try anyway.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 19, 2011, 05:29:55 AM
Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.

Is there no limit to the extent of CARL's ability to self-fail?

So Joe, do you believe this forum and/or the internet existed in 1969?

I just shattered my skull from facepalming so hard.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on October 19, 2011, 07:02:46 AM
You do realize that most male humans do masturbate, and that looking at a pretty picture or an interesting fillum can aid in this healthful and necessary practice?

Yes, I understand that this is the case.

But not your good self, eh?  Is that difficult?

I'm actually a computer programme designed to test out the reception of sarcasm on the internet, so it's technically impossible.

The whole thread is hilarious, actually.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Holmes on October 19, 2011, 08:20:20 AM
Was gonna post it. opebo asking Al if he masturbates... well, I don't think anyone is gonna make a better post here today, so I'm out.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 19, 2011, 10:13:27 AM
Yeah, opebo and Al don't interact enough. I feel like a lot of really entertaining stuff could come out of more scenes between the two of them.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 19, 2011, 01:30:11 PM
Yeah, opebo and Al don't interact enough. I feel like a lot of really entertaining stuff could come out of more scenes between the two of them.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on October 19, 2011, 02:03:01 PM
Once again you completely missed the point, CARL, but nice try anyway.
You didn't answer the question!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on October 19, 2011, 06:35:40 PM
so, on the same day Joe comes out of the closet, he re-registers as a Republican?!
Same thing, really, isn't it?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: All Along The Watchtower on October 19, 2011, 09:32:47 PM
You do realize that most male humans do masturbate, and that looking at a pretty picture or an interesting fillum can aid in this healthful and necessary practice?

Yes, I understand that this is the case.

But not your good self, eh?  Is that difficult?

If that's not an Atlas thread, then I'm John Huntsman and I approve this message.

I'm actually a computer programme designed to test out the reception of sarcasm on the internet, so it's technically impossible.

The whole thread is hilarious, actually.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 20, 2011, 12:18:09 AM
Context

I think this should be a question on the Republican debate.

answer: 9-9-9


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 20, 2011, 12:33:29 PM
Cain: 999 times
Bachmann: We need to stop Barrack Obama's constant masturbation
Santorum: Masturbation goes against family values
Gingrich: I don't masturbate, I just cheat on my wife
Huntsman: (boycotting the question)
Paul: Every American citizen has the freedom to masturbate
Perry: Under my leadership, the state of Texas has led the nation in masturbation
Romney: I support masturbation. I mean, I oppose it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 20, 2011, 12:41:18 PM
I think the reason why so many hacks on the left hate Napoleon is because he refuses engage in the brutal nastiness that they love. Px's bitchiness about him is some good proof of that.


Pot meets the kettle black.

English on work you should.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 20, 2011, 02:18:32 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Marokai Backbeat on October 21, 2011, 08:35:44 AM
Oakvale deserves props for his incredibly accurate and amusing portrayal of what I would almost assuredly be, were Atlasian politics real. :P

I meet Marokai Blue at a Nyman bar. It's around three in the afternoon, and he looks frazzled. He's wearing a raincoat for reasons I don't understand and carrying a large binder. Throughout the course of our conversation he'll pull a document from the binder and wave it around to illustrate a point. I order straight whiskey, he a Cosmopolitan. After gently insulting his choice of beverage, I get down to business. We sit for hours, as I chain-smoke cigarettes and Marokai orders progressively stronger drinks. With passage of the smoking ban some moons ago, the barman should technically ask me to stop, but he's a wizened old Latino man who looks about ninety and doesn't seem to care. Anyway.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 21, 2011, 10:39:44 AM
Oakvale deserves props for his incredibly accurate and amusing portrayal of what I would almost assuredly be, were Atlasian politics real. :P

I meet Marokai Blue at a Nyman bar. It's around three in the afternoon, and he looks frazzled. He's wearing a raincoat for reasons I don't understand and carrying a large binder. Throughout the course of our conversation he'll pull a document from the binder and wave it around to illustrate a point. I order straight whiskey, he a Cosmopolitan. After gently insulting his choice of beverage, I get down to business. We sit for hours, as I chain-smoke cigarettes and Marokai orders progressively stronger drinks. With passage of the smoking ban some moons ago, the barman should technically ask me to stop, but he's a wizened old Latino man who looks about ninety and doesn't seem to care. Anyway.

No Atlasia and no attention-whoring, please.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on October 21, 2011, 03:28:46 PM
Oakvale deserves props for his incredibly accurate and amusing portrayal of what I would almost assuredly be, were Atlasian politics real. :P

I meet Marokai Blue at a Nyman bar. It's around three in the afternoon, and he looks frazzled. He's wearing a raincoat for reasons I don't understand and carrying a large binder. Throughout the course of our conversation he'll pull a document from the binder and wave it around to illustrate a point. I order straight whiskey, he a Cosmopolitan. After gently insulting his choice of beverage, I get down to business. We sit for hours, as I chain-smoke cigarettes and Marokai orders progressively stronger drinks. With passage of the smoking ban some moons ago, the barman should technically ask me to stop, but he's a wizened old Latino man who looks about ninety and doesn't seem to care. Anyway.

No Atlasia and no attention-whoring, please.

Who made you the guardian of this thread?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 21, 2011, 03:39:35 PM

Finally. Xahar's post that make some sense :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 21, 2011, 04:02:55 PM

Finally. Xahar's post that make some sense :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on October 21, 2011, 04:50:02 PM
Why would anyone vote against this site? Its great to see that they are giving jobs to the local residents, even if that means webpage design.

A bold strike against the plague of preteen unemployment


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on October 21, 2011, 10:54:44 PM
Really? You think his last name is actually "Job's"? Come on, man...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on October 22, 2011, 12:47:09 AM

Connect the dots for me...

hows does privacy under the 14th = abortion on demand?

I personally am pro choice, but you just can't get there via the 14th.. imho....

I just connected the dots in your post for you. I'll expect you to do it next time. It's really quite easy.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 22, 2011, 01:29:41 PM
^^Terrific The Professor post.

I'd be willing to bet The Situation has a firmer grasp on economics.

You are being an annoying.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 22, 2011, 02:25:23 PM
Typical Obama; thousands of U.S. jobs being handed over to foreigners... who we were at war with less than a decade ago!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: RI on October 22, 2011, 07:07:14 PM

Because it's preppy and overpriced. Would not recommend.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 22, 2011, 07:31:44 PM
The Winfield legacy lives on

Is Romney a giant gaffe machine waiting to happen?

This is nothing short of trolling.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on October 23, 2011, 12:56:21 AM
Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.

Is there no limit to the extent of CARL's ability to self-fail?

So Joe, do you believe this forum and/or the internet existed in 1969?

I just shattered my skull from facepalming so hard.

Why?  I thought CARL's attempt at humor was quite obvious, and not without success.  I don't think he would be so obtuse as to not realize I had purposely changed the timestamp to an impossible one, tho not the earliest one.

However, it does go to show that this forum does suffer from the Y2K38 bug, tho weirdly it suffers it a day too early.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 23, 2011, 08:03:24 AM
Sorry, we aren't running an orphanage here.

Having just read over a number of threads in this subforum, I'm afraid I have to disagree.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 23, 2011, 10:14:15 AM
I couldn't think of anything to say about GHW Bush.  I think he probably glanced at his watch and yawned about four hours into the job of cutting down the tree.  This infuriated the tree's owner, who felt that Bush was aloof and out of touch, and the tree's owner replaced him with Clinton, who "did not have sex with that tree (as I understood the term to be defined)" as ernest pointed out.

Bush's son started to cut down the tree (after giving the oval knot-hole a thorough scrubbing), but about a quarter of the way through the tree-cutting job he mysteriously stopped and walked away.  He showed up the next day drunk and wearing a "tree-chopping accomplished" T-shirt.  The actual job of cutting down the tree, and cleaning up the mess, was left to someone else.

Obama might have finished the job, but after a few strokes he looked at the axe and said that it was acting stupidly.  The axe was offended but Obama, being a quick thinker, decided to have the axe over for a beer in the White House garden to make up for offending him.   The tree never got cut down, but Mr. Nobel called Obama and told him to come to Sweden right away so they can give him a special tree-chopping prize for his good work chopping down the tree. 

The tree still stands.

Ron Paul says he can finish cutting down that tree, but I'd be surprised if he could even pick up the axe.  Herman Cain says he can finish cutting down that tree, but refuses to start till the owner decides whether it's an apple tree or an orange tree.  Michelle Bachmann says she can cut down that tree, but wants us to build a double wall around the tree, in order to protect her, before she'll start.  Jon Huntsman says he'll cut down the tree, but he won't do it today because he's on strike to protest the fact that the tree wants to be cut down so early in the year.  Mitt Romney says he can cut down that tree, after all, he chopped a tree about 96% of the way down in Massachusetts one time, and it only cost about three times what he said it would cost to do it, and anyway you can't compare Massachusetts trees to this tree, so please let him have the job of cutting down this tree.  Rick Perry says he can cut down that tree, brother.  He says all he needs, brother, is some branches to start raking the, um, I mean, some rake to start--  er, I mean, hatchet--  yeah, a hatchet to cut the ah...  What were we going to cut again?   

Rick Santorum says we should never, ever cut down that tree.  If we cut down that tree, then what's next?  It will lead to telephone poles being cut down and schools being cut down and factories being cut down.  Before you know it young children will be walking around all night with axes trying to cut stuff down, and it will be the end of civilization as we know it. 

While all these folks are arguing, a distant cousin of Obama hijacks an airplane and flies it into the tree, which bursts into flame and burns down the entire forest.  Problem solved. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on October 23, 2011, 03:10:18 PM
Context:

sounds like something Ron Paul would ask Ben Bernanke.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on October 25, 2011, 04:37:04 PM
This entire thread:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139636.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 25, 2011, 05:04:28 PM
This entire thread:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139636.0

That made me laugh for a while. ;D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on October 25, 2011, 05:30:53 PM
This entire thread:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139636.0

Specifically this...

Actually how does he do it?  There must be some trick like translating something back and forth through several languages on google translate, or something like that.  No one could be this clever to just make that up.

The Arkansas to English translator is still in beta-mode.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 25, 2011, 06:20:34 PM
This entire thread:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=139636.0

Specifically this...

Actually how does he do it?  There must be some trick like translating something back and forth through several languages on google translate, or something like that.  No one could be this clever to just make that up.

The Arkansas to English translator is still in beta-mode.

I laughed for a good 5 minutes at that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on October 25, 2011, 10:21:35 PM
I once had a dream sometime in 2005 that Ronald Reagan came back from the dead (literally) and ran for President in 2006.
Not only that but George W. Bush changed his party identification to Democrat sometime in late 2005 because "everybody likes Democrats now mkay?"  Almost immediately he becomes this diehard left wing granola eating liberal and decides to ban guns.
Ronald Reagan wins the 2006 Republican Primaries decisively and goes onto rape Bushie in the 2006 Presidential Election (don't ask me why it was taking place in 2006 it just did).
And he won over 500 Electoral Votes and afterwards all I heard in the background was Rocky montage music.

I swear I'm not making that up.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: #CriminalizeSobriety on October 26, 2011, 07:48:59 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 27, 2011, 09:09:57 AM
It is somewhat funny but I'm almost under the impression democrats think "Oh well, Obama is a good campaigner and will win because of it" under any circumstance. It's ridiculous.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on October 27, 2011, 01:52:59 PM
It is somewhat funny but I'm almost under the impression democrats think "Oh well, Obama is a good campaigner and will win because of it" under any circumstance. It's ridiculous.

Mike has blocked out 2008. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 27, 2011, 07:25:55 PM
Not sure I was listening all that well, but last week on talk radio they were saying Huntsman tried out for the football team republican nomination while he was in college the former governor of utah…he didn’t make the team win and was cut…but he kept showing up to practices debates acting as if he were still a member of the team and the coaches electorate had to repeatedly tell him to take a hike…supposedly went on for days if not weeks


still fits.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on October 28, 2011, 12:08:30 AM
It's going to be a great game tonight.  It is Friday morning in St Louis, so it is legal and appropriate to say tonight.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on October 28, 2011, 12:23:49 AM
You have to excuse Bushie. Referring to tonight with disregard for GMT zones is probable cause for suspicion of Sharia Law practice in the great OK.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 28, 2011, 03:27:33 PM
Most of them are quislings and will hopefully be the first up against the wall when the system collapses.
Thank you. That's a wonderful illustration of the attitude that sensible people oppose in this.

Oh, don't worry. It's much more likely that it'll be your type doing the shooting.
my, uh, "type"? granola munching Huntsman supporters?

What you munch in the privacy of your own home is none of my concern.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on October 30, 2011, 03:10:29 PM
Rather than link the thread, I'll just link the video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7M4gz97Y9W8

This is the best political speech of a generation.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 30, 2011, 08:26:10 PM
Well, looks like Obama is officially primaryless :(

Randall Terry will easily carry NH.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on October 31, 2011, 04:56:39 AM
From the thread "German population to shrink by a fifth by 2060":

I suppose this isn't quite as awful as the last time Germany shed a large chunk of its population.



Too soon?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on October 31, 2011, 08:49:07 AM
Almost forgot that this fat bastard had been planning on running. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on November 01, 2011, 05:07:54 AM
I love this exchange.

Just googled her, I don't read fiction so that explains it. So my lack of knowledge of female fiction writer somehow sums me up? At least I admit things like that instead of running to Google every time to pretend I know something I don't(like Link).

Franz Kafka was a man.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on November 01, 2011, 04:10:07 PM
I love this exchange.

Just googled her, I don't read fiction so that explains it. So my lack of knowledge of female fiction writer somehow sums me up? At least I admit things like that instead of running to Google every time to pretend I know something I don't(like Link).

Franz Kafka was a man.

A pearl of exotic beauty that had to be dug out of that horrible mudhole of a thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on November 01, 2011, 04:12:29 PM
Honestly it is hard to believe and terribly disturbing that one meets persons here who have not read Kafka.  What is the point of engaging suchlike?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on November 01, 2011, 07:21:33 PM
Honestly it is hard to believe and terribly disturbing that one meets persons here who have not read Kafka.  What is the point of engaging suchlike?

Do you find it Kafkaesque?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on November 01, 2011, 10:15:31 PM
Heidi Heitkamp is probably the single most popular and beautiful politician in all of South Dakota. I will be floored if she loses.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on November 02, 2011, 02:44:25 AM
Click for context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on November 02, 2011, 03:47:49 AM
If Herman Cain were white:

He'd be hounded by charges that he fathered two black children.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on November 02, 2011, 12:30:58 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on November 03, 2011, 02:01:42 PM

Hey, I like Justin Bieber.  I'm not a fan of his music, per se, but I like him as a person.  I've read a little bit of his biography and he seems to be a good, Christian kid.  We definitely need more good, Christian people in the music industry.  They don't have to necessarily be in the Christian music genre, but at least represent Christ in such a way that honors and glorifies him.  The band U2, while not a Christian band per se, are strong Christians.  Even KISS became a Christian not too long ago.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on November 03, 2011, 02:09:17 PM
Was it just a typo, or does he think KISS is one man?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on November 03, 2011, 04:51:00 PM

Hey, I like Justin Bieber.  I'm not a fan of his music, per se, but I like him as a person.  I've read a little bit of his biography and he seems to be a good, Christian kid.  We definitely need more good, Christian people in the music industry.  They don't have to necessarily be in the Christian music genre, but at least represent Christ in such a way that honors and glorifies him.  The band U2, while not a Christian band per se, are strong Christians.  Even KISS became a Christian not too long ago.

I can't believe he is serious. I. just. Can't. Believe.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on November 03, 2011, 04:56:18 PM

Hey, I like Justin Bieber.  I'm not a fan of his music, per se, but I like him as a person.  I've read a little bit of his biography and he seems to be a good, Christian kid.  We definitely need more good, Christian people in the music industry.  They don't have to necessarily be in the Christian music genre, but at least represent Christ in such a way that honors and glorifies him.  The band U2, while not a Christian band per se, are strong Christians.  Even KISS became a Christian not too long ago.

I can't believe he is serious. I. just. Can't. Believe.

One word: Oklahoma.

Believe now?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on November 03, 2011, 11:25:14 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on November 04, 2011, 02:38:28 AM
North Korea as Liberia is one of the only three countries in the world (along with the US and Burma) that doesn't use metric. I would enjoy overthrowing the corrupt government and reuniting with South Korea.

PEW PEW PEW


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 04, 2011, 04:41:09 PM
Some more examples:

()

That's one huge France!

Holy crap, that wasn't just a careless mistake.  It really took some effort to get it that wrong.

Charlemagne lives!  :)

Looking at it again, it looks like the background map is too small a scale.  That one might be a technical error, as opposed to stupidity.

That doesn't explain how Toulouse is east of Lyon.

Toulouse is off, but the rest would be right on a larger scale map.
No, Lyon and Cannes should both be East of Paris.

oh jayjay...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on November 04, 2011, 06:09:00 PM
Even if it's a scale issue, it's a pretty dramatic one.  I mean, Strausbourg is out hanging out with Stuttgart in that map.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on November 04, 2011, 10:00:36 PM

Hey, I like Justin Bieber.  I'm not a fan of his music, per se, but I like him as a person.  I've read a little bit of his biography and he seems to be a good, Christian kid.  We definitely need more good, Christian people in the music industry.  They don't have to necessarily be in the Christian music genre, but at least represent Christ in such a way that honors and glorifies him.  The band U2, while not a Christian band per se, are strong Christians.  Even KISS became a Christian not too long ago.

I can't believe he is serious. I. just. Can't. Believe.

Truly unbelievable! How could BushOK not capitalize the "H" in "Him" in that post?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 05, 2011, 07:47:00 AM
I voted Romney, though Dr Paul or the Spic would do fine as well.

Bachmann or Santorum are too like real life evil. People don't pay to be reminded of what it's actually like. They can have that at a PTA meeting.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on November 05, 2011, 03:18:27 PM
99% of us are hot girls pretending to be men because we don't want to be hit on by horny nerds like we believe 99% of us are.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on November 05, 2011, 05:53:28 PM
Jesus christ, guys, this isn't the men's room at the Republican National Convention.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Peeperkorn on November 05, 2011, 06:38:06 PM
Rasmussen Obama (National) (http://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/politics/obama_administration/obama_approval_index_history)

We are reaching a point where the Gallup numbers will become important.  If, beginning next week, Obama starts dropping below 40% and stays there on the weekly numbers, it is probably over.

How right you are my lumpy little student. November 7th is "Official Gallup Becomes Important Day".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on November 05, 2011, 08:47:46 PM
Calling for a military coup is trolling, opebo. You've been reported.

Seriously?  You little twat.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on November 05, 2011, 10:27:12 PM
None of you have a sense of humor.

Then again, this wasn't all that funny.

Herman Cain has an Atlas account.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on November 06, 2011, 12:31:44 PM
Yeah, unless they're bleeding all over the food or something.

I'm pretty sure that that applies even if they aren't HIV-positive.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 06, 2011, 05:25:08 PM
Man, these people are too lazy to even sign up for unemployment benefits?! No wonder they're out of work! JOHN GALT '12


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on November 07, 2011, 03:46:33 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on November 07, 2011, 07:07:03 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on November 08, 2011, 06:21:47 AM
()


(Seriously, though, I'm still withholding judgment.)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on November 08, 2011, 02:46:23 PM
Krazey pwned. Again.

It's impressive that Aaron Burr got elected to anything after he shot Alexander Hamilton.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on November 08, 2011, 07:10:54 PM
If she did not have it, she would be taller than Cain's wife and this whole misunderstanding could have been avoided.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on November 08, 2011, 09:45:11 PM
This whole thing. Lots of editing; whenever I took out a word, I tried to add one in nearby, and vice versa. Still, it should be grammatically correct, and the spirit of our words is still there.


Dear Herman Cain,

Why did you bang little boys all over the altar at church over the word limit, constituting a violation of the Kyoto Protocol? She took 999 with hot sauce (lol jk mustard). After the kidnapping, we watched porn while Congresswoman Michele Bachmann took a really huge poo. Anyways, please go tell Xahar STFU, because his cynicism makes me cry like Alexander Hamilton, not to mention my well endowed hail to manufacturing your pizza chain.

Prescription painkillers have been assigned by Conrad Murray, who still doesn't understand our love in the form we express it, which is ing gay. Past sentences make absolutely no sense, because some posters dislike such threads. Your Uncle Ruckus's thread sucks. Yeah, it totally does. BRTD is whining, for good reason. As Xahar said with great, great astuteness, this thread is terrible. Let's try to derail this trainwreck by cooking pizza and cutting taxes.

So, Mr. Cain, we love you like a wife who needs a man that is not afraid to suck your weird and pathetic pizzas. That said, those little boys are pizzas that taste very good. Your wife is black. That is purple down underneath the fuzzy coat that you stole from a bum like John Boehner, who is a piece of ****. But Rick Perry, who hates cancer, found Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi locked in a closet naked together with a prostitute and Burt Reynolds, who had prolapsed Jesus Christ's nipples, which were very hard and moist.

Then Ron Paul stripped totally nude. It was hot. He brought chicks with very firm, fiscally conservative ideas and large clitori, which were used



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on November 09, 2011, 06:22:45 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on November 09, 2011, 10:37:51 AM
It may be what people secretly think internationally, but in Israel it's common knowledge.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 09, 2011, 10:51:51 AM
Yeah, I laughed at that one as well.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on November 09, 2011, 10:17:04 PM
This may have been a bit of a swipe at me, but it was still funny:

Feminists must archive the Forum Community in order to break gender stereotypes and prove that any group of people can act like middle school girls.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on November 10, 2011, 01:08:16 AM
Phil, your continued refusal to purchase a ticket for a sleeper cabin in the Cain Train has been noted in my Racism Journal.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on November 10, 2011, 06:50:04 AM
From the NFL pick em:

Giants (6-2) at 49ers (7-1) - San Francisco Giants


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on November 10, 2011, 06:57:06 AM

I love how completely incomprehensible that selection is. The San Francisco Giants haven't played at Candlestick Park since 1999.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on November 10, 2011, 07:02:06 AM

I love how completely incomprehensible that selection is. The San Francisco Giants haven't played at Candlestick Park since 1999.

There are actually Giants in SF ? Too bad though for BushOK that they are in the wrong sport ... :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on November 10, 2011, 07:04:53 AM

I love how completely incomprehensible that selection is. The San Francisco Giants haven't played at Candlestick Park since 1999.

There are actually Giants in SF ? Too bad though for BushOK that they are in the wrong sport ... :P

You didn't know that? Perhaps you should look at some other American sports sometimes. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on November 10, 2011, 09:49:05 AM
Bushie ::)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on November 10, 2011, 12:58:28 PM
I would choose Romney but I'm tempted for Santorum's because I like dogs.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on November 10, 2011, 07:45:49 PM
Well, if by 'health and human services' you mean the term in a cruelly sarcastic way, and in fact want something more like a department of genocide in practice, then Wonkfish is your man.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on November 11, 2011, 05:15:29 PM
Ireland is up 4-0. Dublin must be exploding with joy. Tuesday's game might be the most pointless match they'll play during this qualifying campaign.
Or so they thought... until Estonia go up 4-0 with four obvious handgoals within the last four minutes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on November 12, 2011, 11:51:16 AM
Gustaf is proving why people accuse him of having no sense of humor (especially with the Stalin comment.)

in real life, Gustaf has a great sense of humor.  he has a group of six or eight friends that come over for tea and cupcakes 3x weekly, and they double over laughing until time disappears.  he also is respected by his co-workers, who also enjoy his comedy, while admiring his ability to separate in from the sphere of hard work with such grace, one would be convinced he'd flipped some internal switch.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on November 14, 2011, 07:16:06 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHAHA!!!!!!!!!! Touche my friend!

Nothing gives me greater satisfaction than a good belly laugh from m'pals.  By the by, have you ever heard of the 'comedy goldmine'? https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=138012.735


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 15, 2011, 11:56:41 AM
Okay, buddy! 3/4 of the political subjects discussed on these forums I could pound you into the ground on with little effort as many on here have already learned.

As can be shown by his impressive knowledge of Mrs Franz Kafka and of the well-known British politicians Willy Brandt and Tage Erlander.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on November 15, 2011, 01:23:08 PM
Okay, buddy! 3/4 of the political subjects discussed on these forums I could pound you into the ground on with little effort as many on here have already learned.

As can be shown by his impressive knowledge of Mrs Franz Kafka and of the well-known British politicians Willy Brandt and Tage Erlander.

On the other hand, he was talking to Bgwah. So it sort of evens out, I'd say.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on November 15, 2011, 02:19:24 PM
Joe Republic you've embarrassed yourself enough on these forums to not be taken seriously.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on November 15, 2011, 04:28:45 PM
Okay, buddy! 3/4 of the political subjects discussed on these forums I could pound you into the ground on with little effort as many on here have already learned.

that whole thread is fantastic


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bgwah on November 15, 2011, 04:45:11 PM
Okay, buddy! 3/4 of the political subjects discussed on these forums I could pound you into the ground on with little effort as many on here have already learned.

As can be shown by his impressive knowledge of Mrs Franz Kafka and of the well-known British politicians Willy Brandt and Tage Erlander.

On the other hand, he was talking to Bgwah. So it sort of evens out, I'd say.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on November 15, 2011, 05:30:44 PM
Okay, buddy! 3/4 of the political subjects discussed on these forums I could pound you into the ground on with little effort as many on here have already learned.

As can be shown by his impressive knowledge of Mrs Franz Kafka and of the well-known British politicians Willy Brandt and Tage Erlander.

On the other hand, he was talking to Bgwah. So it sort of evens out, I'd say.

()

I saw your post was the last one and figured it was a response to mine. Remembering what I had posted I was actually going to apologize, because in retrospect it was an uncalled for jerk sort of post.

This kind of made me speechless though. This world has so many layers of irony sometimes I just feel lost.

Carry on with the goldmining everyone.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CLARENCE 2015! on November 15, 2011, 07:21:20 PM
Just put anything Obepo says in here!!!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 15, 2011, 08:25:48 PM
Are we really analyzing the Star Wars prequels?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on November 15, 2011, 09:54:35 PM
Slavoj Zizek has written extensively about "Kung Fu Panda", so I think the Star Wars prequels are fair game.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on November 15, 2011, 09:56:16 PM
Slavoj Zizek has written extensively about "Kung Fu Panda", so I think the Star Wars prequels are fair game.

The question then arises whether the Off-Topic Forum should not aspire to more academical rigour than a Zizek book.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on November 16, 2011, 04:21:55 AM
I would like to sponser a n00b for membership to the institute:

And nothing is worse than boning a woman with no ass.   It's like shagging an 11-year old boy.  Not that I would know what making love to a preteen boy is like.  I'm a non-practicing Catholic. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on November 16, 2011, 04:29:05 AM
Slavoj Zizek has written extensively about "Kung Fu Panda", so I think the Star Wars prequels are fair game.

The question then arises whether the Off-Topic Forum should not aspire to more academical rigour than a Zizek book.

I agree with this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tetro Kornbluth on November 16, 2011, 05:24:33 AM
Slavoj Zizek has written extensively about "Kung Fu Panda", so I think the Star Wars prequels are fair game.

The question then arises whether the Off-Topic Forum should not aspire to more academical rigour than a Zizek book.

I agree with this.

Ditto.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on November 16, 2011, 12:02:48 PM
Just put anything Obepo says in here!!!

You can do it, Seabees!  Its your duty... hooo-aagh!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on November 16, 2011, 02:00:11 PM
Slavoj Zizek has written extensively about "Kung Fu Panda", so I think the Star Wars prequels are fair game.

The question then arises whether the Off-Topic Forum should not aspire to more academical rigour than a Zizek book.

I agree with this.

Ditto.

Preach it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on November 17, 2011, 12:57:16 AM
How would you describe a mix between Libertas and Opebo ?
Did Charlie screw your sister or something?  That is very mean.

I meant in terms of political views, not about assholery.

Libertas was one of the kindest and most polite members I've ever encountered here, he just had no tolerance for idiots.

You mean he had problems of self-hatred ?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on November 17, 2011, 09:53:08 AM
God wants you to put your money in a bank account and do your job.  Rest assured, He will punish you if you do otherwise.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Linus Van Pelt on November 17, 2011, 08:19:51 PM

Yes.  Of course we consider it a vegetable.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on November 17, 2011, 09:48:01 PM
Torie- disagree that Bachmann is intelligent or that her uncompromising conservatism won't find fans in primary voters, especially Iowa caucusers.  Not hard so for her to convince them Newt, Cain, Romney, Perry are all unacceptable.  And she is even if not exactly what they want.  Santorum is competition for the same vacuum but I like her chances better than his to get traction.  Assuming she can avoid a campaign ending gaffe.  Big if perhaps.
 
get back Joe Joe...it ain't gonna happen.  we'd rather go with Romney than Bachmann
What part of her is damaged goods?

she comes across as a kok and doesnt know it, example when she said 999 was the sign of the devil.  also, her stuff about vaccines making people lose mind and dumb


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on November 19, 2011, 03:29:59 AM
An interesting side note - in Swahili, which is the official language of Kenya, The words of the 1994 Disney Classic The Lion King of "hakuna matata" means "no problems".  The movie says it means "no worries", so it's pretty much spot on.  So, not only are they real words, but the definition the movie gives is correct.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on November 19, 2011, 03:38:29 AM
The vinegar and honey just exacerbate the decay problem.

Obviously untrue as my teeth are fine.

Different standards of fine between the Land of Dental Overperfection and the Land That Dentistry Forgot.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on November 19, 2011, 02:28:10 PM
I was just about to post that one, Joe.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on November 20, 2011, 02:39:58 AM
I tend to assume that most tight elections in New Mexico were stolen, especially when the PRI wins.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CLARENCE 2015! on November 20, 2011, 11:15:55 PM
Was looking for Newt videos from the Family Forum and came across this YouTube...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56ORjyp_ddY&feature=channel_video_title


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on November 20, 2011, 11:27:54 PM
Click for context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on November 21, 2011, 09:03:08 AM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on November 21, 2011, 04:51:32 PM
Alright we'll see how much the people of the UK are willing to put up with this when their inflation rate passes 10%.

Then we'll see if the UK can maintain their precious low cost of capital at current monetization rates.

Both of these things are not long off. So enjoy today UK because it definitely isn't going to last long.

Just you wait, 'enry 'iggins, just you wait!
You'll be sorry, but your tears'll be to late!
You'll be broke, and I'll have money;
Will I help you? Don't be funny!
Just you wait, 'enry 'iggins, just you wait!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Cincinnatus on November 22, 2011, 01:07:26 PM
Consolidate my position in power, obviously. I would start my eliminating my known enemies, both within the Party and outside it. I would then set up a state-of-the-art secret police so that I could eliminate future enemies before they even become enemies. I would also have regular purges of the Party, of government and whatever is left of civil society; you simply have to keep people on their toes. This would include setting up and controlling dissident organisations, and crushing the rest. Naturally, I would also have multiple escape plans.

I would also cultivate a loyal band of cronies, although I would try to make sure that at least some are of above average intelligence. They would be well rewarded, would be up to their neck in any dubious things I do, but would also understand that they are not immune. I would also try to make sure that a majority of the population benefit, in some way, from my regime, and would also try to amuse them from time to time with 'crazy' decrees. It would also be important to pick international allies and to work out which big players it is safe to insult.

In other words, I would act exactly as I have done as International Elections moderator.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on November 22, 2011, 08:38:07 PM
this made me lol:

Why is an Asian man named Israel Ortega?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on November 22, 2011, 09:27:43 PM
I hereby nominate the following for the Blazing Saddles comedy award.

Not as bad as if you replaced Portugal with Norway...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on November 22, 2011, 09:51:33 PM
Doesn't really work without context.

I give up. I expect bad things from government bureaucrats, but this is beyond anything I've experienced before. There's some adjective derived from some author and some French suffix for this kind of thing, but despite being something of an expert in women's literature and English adjectives, I can't recall what it is - "ą la Brontė" or something like that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on November 22, 2011, 09:53:34 PM

JMFCST FLAVOR OF THE MONTH TRENDWATCH: signs indicate Huntsman may be in line to be the Anti-Romney of December, if Newt's campaign happens to falter


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on November 22, 2011, 10:42:00 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=144214.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Small Business Owner of Any Repute on November 23, 2011, 05:55:29 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=144214.0

I shouldn't have laughed at that at all, and yet I did so uncontrollably.

PS: That thread is exactly how those of us who don't read what-if timelines view each and every what-if timeline.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on November 23, 2011, 11:10:50 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=144214.0

I shouldn't have laughed at that at all, and yet I did so uncontrollably.

PS: That thread is exactly how those of us who don't read what-if timelines view each and every what-if timeline.

Best post from that thread:

I feel like there's some code here.

If I read it enough times, I'll discover the key to the Antikythera Mechanism.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on November 23, 2011, 11:12:03 AM
Don't be stingy, Xahar. Why post only a snippet of a top 5 post of the year?

[ring ... ring ...]

Hello, you've reached the Department of Labor, Regulatory Compliance Information Services Division. How may I help you?

Hello, I'm calling from the suburban Milwaukee investment firm that e-mailed you last week. As you'll recall, we're considering an investment in a metal fabrication company in Oshkosh but we have some questions about the legality of the proposed contract they have sent us. One of the clauses contains a procedure for disbanding their union, but the legal precedents for the specific procedure are unclear. Have you had a look at the e-mail I sent and determined whether your department considers this a legal procedure?

Yes, I had a look at the contract. The union is holding the company hostage, just like the NJEA is holding hostage the taxpayers of New Jersey, who have been forced to increase funds to the New Brunswick school district by 35% over ten years with no improvement in test scores.

Uh... OK, but do you think that the contract is legal, or is the company at risk of prosecution?

The NJEA crybabies claim that "class sizes need to go down!" even though this hasn't shown any improvement in results, and they've got everything they want from their people in Trenton.

Right, but I'm not interested in New Jersey internal politics; do you realize I'm calling from Wisconsin?

Yes, the state where the previous governor Doyle raided the transportation fund to give to the teachers' unions. Now matter where you go, Democrats gouge the ordinary taxpayer to satisfy their greedy union buddies.

Look, I'm a private-sector white-collar worker in Waukesha County, I'm obviously a Republican and you don't need to convince me of that, but what do you think about this contract?

Republicans can be just as guilty as well. Before Chris Christie came along, Tom Kean sold the farm to the union thugs just as much as Corzine.

You're not answering any of my questions; this is totally unproductive.

On the contrary, I am maximally productive. The productivity of my answers can be straightforwardly measured by how many questions each answer answers, and I have given just one answer to all your questions.

You dumb*ss, productivity is the ration of GDP per hour worked. Are you still in high school?

No, I have graduated from South Crapsboro High School, which has a median SAT score 45% higher than Central Newark High despite spending $1,227 less per pupil.

I give up. I expect bad things from government bureaucrats, but this is beyond anything I've experienced before. There's some adjective derived from some author and some French suffix for this kind of thing, but despite being something of an expert in women's literature and English adjectives, I can't recall what it is - "ą la Brontė" or something like that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on November 23, 2011, 06:19:49 PM
Many years ago, when a mere youth, I tried switching from my dominant hand to my left, and surprisingly I've never looked back.  It seems more enjoyable with the non-dominant hand, almost like another person is doing it, and as an added bonus you don't end up looking like this:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on November 25, 2011, 10:27:47 AM
and then we have the jmfcst version of Occupy White House:

[pic]

just think what a far better place the USA would be if the jmfcst's were on the other side of those gates!

Getting shot by the Secret Service for trespassing?  Agreed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on November 25, 2011, 10:29:30 AM
Regarding Wonkish:


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on November 25, 2011, 11:46:56 AM
That one was great but would fit better here: https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=134914.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on November 25, 2011, 04:14:20 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=144364.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on November 25, 2011, 05:28:50 PM
Nothing said before the age of 18 is true.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on November 26, 2011, 11:08:53 AM
Like most of his posts this is even better in context:

I often wonder if some of you are even trying to get girls


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 27, 2011, 12:07:05 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on November 27, 2011, 12:46:55 PM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on November 27, 2011, 01:19:03 PM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?
Goldmines tend to play out quickly. This is a respectable Institute, and it's well-endowed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 27, 2011, 01:41:29 PM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?
Goldmines tend to play out quickly. This is a respectable Institute, and it's well-endowed.

Mr Naso is an extremely generous benefactor.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on November 27, 2011, 01:50:31 PM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?

You're about to make the Dean's List with that silly question, son.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on November 27, 2011, 01:57:27 PM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?

Goldmines tend to play out quickly. This is a respectable Institute, and it's well-endowed.

oh my God.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on November 27, 2011, 02:01:51 PM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?
Goldmines tend to play out quickly. This is a respectable Institute, and it's well-endowed.
Don't use the e-word.  I don't want this morphing into a replacement for the Hot Guys thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on November 27, 2011, 02:14:55 PM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?
Goldmines tend to play out quickly. This is a respectable Institute, and it's well-endowed.
Don't use the e-word.  I don't want this morphing into a replacement for the Hot Guys thread.
What's the "e-word" - E****t?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on November 28, 2011, 12:56:22 AM
Why did this last longer than most of the Comedy Goldmines?
Goldmines tend to play out quickly. This is a respectable Institute, and it's well-endowed.
Don't use the e-word.  I don't want this morphing into a replacement for the Hot Guys thread.
What's the "e-word" - E****t?
e*****d, tho I will allow that E****t could be used as a synonym. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on November 28, 2011, 11:09:33 AM
Shame.  I was hoping they'd lose the season, but it appears the Grinch stole Christmas again.

Essentially the same except I hope the nba would never recover.

Oklahoma City needs the NBA.  Thunder home games bring in roughly $1 million dollars each game so in a full season that's a little over $40 million.  This season that will be $33 million or so.  Of course, with our success in the 2011 Playoffs, the Thunder brought in an extra $10 million to our City.  We are expected to contend for the Western Division crown again this year (that kind of prediction scares me to death), so hopefully we can get closer to a full season's worth of revenue.

I like this new CBA as it gives the small market teams like the Thunder a better chance to compete in getting the really good players that always seem to go to the Lakers, Mavs, Heat, or Celtics, your large market franchises, and gives us a very good chance at keeping arguably two of the leagues best young players in Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook.


Yeah sure...but no one needs Oklahoma City.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on November 28, 2011, 03:03:58 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on November 28, 2011, 06:36:30 PM
Thus always to anti-hashtag tyrants!

Quote
This is a message board, leave your hash tags for Twitter.

I'll post in any manner that I wish. #SicSemperTyrannis


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on November 29, 2011, 01:01:09 PM
Yes. Standards are way too high. It's like when you see a gorgeous girl and your friends say, "You must have low standards" and you think...if that's having low standards...what the hell is having high standards?

I find this post disturbing?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on November 29, 2011, 01:05:10 PM
To be quite honest I have to admit that I do have at least a little bit of jealousy for my wealthy clients that ditched their wives for 'newer models' later in life. Not saying I'll do it when that comes(and no I'm not currently married), but the notion at least has some appeal to it.
That belongs in the Truth is Brutal Mine.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on November 29, 2011, 08:41:19 PM
jmfcsts are closet socialists, so obviously they are not going to vote for a businessperson.

a businessman or businesswoman perhaps, but definitely not a businessperson


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on November 29, 2011, 10:40:20 PM
You forgot that black guy, didn't you?  Cain or McCain, something like that?  He must be a Southron Babdist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on November 29, 2011, 11:58:25 PM

Well, look, the word "moderate" is right there in his name! I think we should defer to his judgment on this one.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on November 30, 2011, 01:24:08 AM
I don't know about the kind of kinky moms he's met, but I don't think my mother is into Santorum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on November 30, 2011, 01:49:47 AM

I think I should get credit for having noticed that months ago.

About as much respect as a monkey who throws his own feces deserves, yes.

Now that you're a moderator, you have the most appropriate name on the forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on November 30, 2011, 10:24:10 AM
Wonkish if it wasn't for Jesus Christ you'd be getting a sh!tload of a lot more posts modded since that's the reason I'm not combing through your posts looking for ones to report like I used to do before I was filled with the Holy Spirit. Quit whining.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on November 30, 2011, 10:26:28 AM
Wonkish if it wasn't for Jesus Christ you'd be getting a sh!tload of a lot more posts modded since that's the reason I'm not combing through your posts looking for ones to report like I used to do before I was filled with the Holy Spirit. Quit whining.

I think that is a dual entry for the absurdity and comedy instit.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on November 30, 2011, 01:17:59 PM
Breathtaking.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on November 30, 2011, 04:12:33 PM
this struck me as funny



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on November 30, 2011, 07:16:53 PM
Some might argue that this entire situation is a little Kafkaesque.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Reginald on November 30, 2011, 09:38:39 PM
He seems to be speaking as clearly as I usually do.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on November 30, 2011, 11:08:02 PM
The might be the best post in the history of our fair forums.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on November 30, 2011, 11:12:03 PM
The might be the best post in the history of our fair forums.

In that same post he leaves it open for interpretation whether Newt Gingrich is definitely speaking or defiantly speaking.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on December 01, 2011, 01:04:54 AM
I gave you all a couple of months to post this bit of hilarity, and you failed me.

Context is key.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 01, 2011, 06:26:44 AM
I don't get it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on December 01, 2011, 08:55:38 AM
Normally, I'm straight, but I've decided to go with gay today. Maybe because I read a Joe Republic post.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on December 01, 2011, 10:27:16 AM

It's a pun of the sort my dad makes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on December 01, 2011, 10:29:32 AM
Normally, I'm straight, but I've decided to go with gay today. Maybe because I read a Joe Republic post.
ah, another attempt to pull Joe out of the closet


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on December 01, 2011, 11:28:27 AM
This bill has my full support, for the very reasons you all oppose it. It will slow the destructive march of the INTERNET and thus stem, if for a while, the detrimental effects it has upon our society, and stop digital innovation. Also, it will help stem the tide of illegal music downloads, the fact that 90% of downloads are illegal is a telling statistic of human depravity. Also, it will stop the destruction of traditional television and print by the  INTERNET. This is great, I really, really hope it passes.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on December 01, 2011, 03:01:30 PM
Romney is in dead girl/live boy territory, guys.

In that, he's a dead girl.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on December 01, 2011, 06:11:59 PM

Post as a near-synonym for column, at a forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on December 01, 2011, 07:36:11 PM
In Australia, the chemicals that alert the brain of funny spin in the opposite direction.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on December 01, 2011, 07:40:03 PM
Well obviously it's not as funny as I thought if I have to post it here myself, and then explain it, but I thought it was hilarious. So stop being racist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on December 01, 2011, 08:10:39 PM
I liked Hugh's post. I consider it to be meta-humour.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on December 01, 2011, 08:54:50 PM
I liked Hugh's post. I consider it to be meta-humour.

It's certainly cleverer than most of the posts in this hallowed Institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 02, 2011, 02:13:46 PM
Is it possible that this post is serious ?

Harper's, undoubtedly. Strangely enough, human history suggests that governments with absolutely commanding majorities like Monti's tend to be less democratic than ones with severe internal divisions, particularly when the government in question was subverted by foreign technocrats.

Pray tell me... which historical examples are you thinking of precisely?


I was thinking of the Italian Social Republic when I wrote that, oddly enough.

Epic fail.

Did not the PFR have commanding majorities in Salò?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on December 02, 2011, 08:03:40 PM
I felt good a person a few days ago, and it was great!  Only cost me about $40, and she was a very good person - 19 and cute, and a real sweetie.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on December 03, 2011, 10:23:58 AM
What the institute really needs is some double entendre

I'm really really really surprised that the GOP hasn't made Santorum their flavor of the month yet. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on December 03, 2011, 01:43:38 PM
Uh, Nick... the International Elections forum is officially constituted as a neo-Stalinist dictatorship. What do you think happens to people who criticise the Leader?

()

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on December 03, 2011, 03:10:20 PM
I gave you all a couple of months to post this bit of hilarity, and you failed me.

Context is key.


???

EDIT: Wait, "forum" + "post", right? I doin't get the offensive part, but hey, A for effort, Hugh!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on December 03, 2011, 03:42:27 PM
Opebo and Gustaf are like the two church ladies who can't stand each other and are always bickering over whose jello salad is better (Opebo's cuz it has fruits and mayonnaise in it... Gustaf just made plain gelatin and put hunks of soured fish in it).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on December 03, 2011, 03:47:51 PM
^^^Wtf do they eat in Minnesota...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on December 03, 2011, 03:57:38 PM
It's a frozen wasteland settled by people who came frrom the old world frozen wasteland. They're happy to have jello, mayonnaise, and sour fish.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on December 03, 2011, 04:02:25 PM
Every time Snowguy posts about food, I get confused, then disgusted.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on December 03, 2011, 06:53:42 PM
As long as you don't plan on going around apologizing for America...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ban my account ffs! on December 03, 2011, 07:17:44 PM
It's a frozen wasteland settled by people who came frrom the old world frozen wasteland. They're happy to have jello, mayonnaise, and sour fish.

We're tied with Washington for having the lowest childhood obesity rate in the nation at 11.1%.  Compare that to over 20% in most of the south.

So our jello salad does us just fine thank you very much.  As for sour fish... only the old Norwegian ladies eat that.  Drenched in melted butter of course.  We do enjoy Mrs. Olson's Lefse at Christmas, made in nearby Gonvick, Minnesota.  It's tasty with butter and sugar and rolled up.  Or butter and jam.  Or to dip in the gravy from the meatballs.

So to answer your question:  We eat like most northern Americans (more often roasting, baking, and braising than frying since ovens have always been a necessity here)... but we have an affinity for hotdish, jello salad, bad coffee, and cheap red wine in a regular glass with ice cubes in it.  Why?  Because it's good enough.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on December 03, 2011, 07:27:25 PM
Obama Average Approval Rating November 2011 (Gallup)

43% Approve

49% Disapprove

Trends for comparison:

Roosevelt: 58/37 (November 1939)

Truman: 54/33 (November 1947) AND 23/61 (November 1951)

Eisenhower: 78/13 (November 1955)

Kennedy: 58/30 (November 1963)

Johnson: 42/46 (November 1967)

Nixon: 49/37 (November 1971)

Ford: 43/45 (November 1975)

Carter: 35/52 (November 1979)

Reagan: 53/37 (November 1983)

Bush I: 55/37 (November 1991)

Clinton: 52/41 (November 1995)

Bush II: 52/45 (November 2003)

Truman was popular in the fall of 47?!  When did he start cratering to fall into the 30's by the summer of 48?

The Korean War. I'm going to guess that as the front line sagged southward so did President Truman's approval rating. The war also got increasingly unpopular as it dragged on.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on December 03, 2011, 07:33:48 PM

What could be better than that?

Well, okay, maybe gay sex.  But that's only fun if you're gay.

For the rest of us, there are Monk reruns.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on December 03, 2011, 07:45:50 PM
I was going to answer that post with something along the lines of "So how do you toss your salad?" but then I thought better of it. It's not a thread made for arguing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on December 03, 2011, 09:16:57 PM
Obama Average Approval Rating November 2011 (Gallup)

43% Approve

49% Disapprove

Trends for comparison:

Roosevelt: 58/37 (November 1939)

Truman: 54/33 (November 1947) AND 23/61 (November 1951)

Eisenhower: 78/13 (November 1955)

Kennedy: 58/30 (November 1963)

Johnson: 42/46 (November 1967)

Nixon: 49/37 (November 1971)

Ford: 43/45 (November 1975)

Carter: 35/52 (November 1979)

Reagan: 53/37 (November 1983)

Bush I: 55/37 (November 1991)

Clinton: 52/41 (November 1995)

Bush II: 52/45 (November 2003)

Truman was popular in the fall of 47?!  When did he start cratering to fall into the 30's by the summer of 48?

The Korean War. I'm going to guess that as the front line sagged southward so did President Truman's approval rating. The war also got increasingly unpopular as it dragged on.

Excellent.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on December 03, 2011, 09:47:54 PM
It's a frozen wasteland settled by people who came frrom the old world frozen wasteland. They're happy to have jello, mayonnaise, and sour fish.

We're tied with Washington for having the lowest childhood obesity rate in the nation at 11.1%.  Compare that to over 20% in most of the south.
Yeah, I'd be skinny as a rail too if all I had to eat was hotdish et al :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on December 03, 2011, 09:50:28 PM
Is Minnesota really that Scandinavian? I thought that was just a stereotype.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on December 04, 2011, 06:00:08 AM
and cheap red wine in a regular glass with ice cubes in it. 
Ugh.

Wine - not really a fan. If it's good enough to drink, it's too expensive to be reasonable value.
Cheap Red Wine - Sick
Water in Wine - just goes to show it wasn't suitable for human consumption in the first place if you even think of that as an option (as they say on the Mosel about Pfalz wine, and in the Rheingau about Rhinehesse wine - "yeah well, if I'd have to drink that I might put water in it")
Ice Cubes in Wine - Go DIAF. Seriously. The world will be a happier place ever after.

No objection to the regular glass, obviously.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on December 04, 2011, 01:18:04 PM
Pretty much all of BRTD's 'Christian' posts could be archived directly here, but it's hard to pick specific examples.

Although its humour largely depends on whether you think he's being genuine or not. If you think he is, most of it is tragicomic. If you think he's trolling, then it's horribly annoying.

Paul could win easily if he won Iowa and then exploited the weakening of Romney to win New Hampshire too... he'd basically be guaranteed the nomination from sheer momentum and no serious opposition.

Jesus, even by Paultard standards that's... amazing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on December 04, 2011, 06:11:48 PM
Every time Snowguy posts about food, I get confused, then disgusted.

Sorry, SG. Couldn't resist. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on December 05, 2011, 10:53:42 AM
Corrected further.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on December 05, 2011, 09:51:40 PM
Forgot to add this at the time, I think. It may be one of the greatest posts in the history of the forum:

I AM an old geezer, actually. It seems only yesterday I watched that "Vremya" newscast where they reported on the First Congress of the Liberal Democratic Party of the Soviet Union and showed the world for the first time that Turkish-speaking ex-legal advisor for a Jewish cultural group that they've selected for the nazi-in-chief to fake multi-party politics. It was a hoot performance from the very first and he he has been a reliable stand-up act ever since.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 07, 2011, 04:23:31 AM
Honestly, this probably is the right decision.  Not that skipping won't hurt Romney, but the risk of something catastrophic happening on the Donald Trump debate outweighs the harm of skipping it.

Plus, it makes Gingrich look like an idiot if he ends up being the only person there (or if it's a Gingrich v. Bachmann debate).

Don't forget Santorum! He'll be there!

Santorum is always present when an asshole meets a prick.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on December 07, 2011, 06:10:32 AM
Damn, I got fiber points, but my Tweed score card had 12oz of Keystone Light on the topline.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on December 07, 2011, 10:44:43 AM
With a 99.5 percent voter turnout at 456 polling stations, United Russia received support of 607,909 voters in Chechnya.

This is just amazing!

In Canada these days if you can get 50% of the voters out it is a really big deal.

So to be able to get a 99.5% voter turnout is really pretty incredible.

I congratulate all of the voters of Chechnya for their support of the Russian election.

It would make for an interesting RIA Novosti article to learn why the Chechnyains are so passionate about their right to vote.

It is inspiring to see so many people in Chechnya supporting their democratic freedom to vote.

Even more interesting that 99.6% of the vote went to the United Russia party. Normally there is more of a variation in how people vote.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 08, 2011, 12:49:20 PM
Why is British Columbia in the proposal? The province doesn't really have much in common with Washington and Oregon.

The inclusion of British Columbia is rather problematic. I can understand seceding from the United States, but who would want to leave Canada?

Yeah, there's no reason to want to lea--

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on December 08, 2011, 05:45:16 PM
Politico (the hack poster, that is, not the website) on Mitt Romney -

Handsome, strong and faithful: He's the ideal man from the biological/psychological perspective of many females.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ban my account ffs! on December 08, 2011, 06:05:31 PM

>:(  I hope you trip and fall spectacularly and are mostly unhurt except for permanently disfiguring your nose so people silently think to themselves "that's why he sounds so nasally when he talks."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on December 08, 2011, 07:25:59 PM
>:(  I hope you trip and fall spectacularly and are mostly unhurt except for permanently disfiguring your nose so people silently think to themselves "that's why he sounds so nasally when he talks."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 08, 2011, 09:09:22 PM
You know just the other day Tweed I was considering you to be my top vote for most underrated poster.

Then you decided to come on here and be a pretentious little c**ntbutt.

Therefore, I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on December 09, 2011, 12:26:27 PM

>:(  I hope you trip and fall spectacularly and are mostly unhurt except for permanently disfiguring your nose so people silently think to themselves "that's why he sounds so nasally when he talks."
Given what my nose looks like right now... perhaps not so bad an idea.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on December 09, 2011, 01:10:25 PM
Xahar translating one of t_host1's posts is impressive -

This feels like trying to decipher Finnegans Wake.

  Don't bet on that, keep in mind that the Obama regime has discharged working white's as being of any support for him, making the dependent workless people wanting, so to vote for him, Obama.

Don't bet on that. Keep in mind that the Obama regime has concluded that working whites will not support them. Thus, Obama is attempting to keep the jobless in their state of dependence, so that they vote for him.

Obama will campaign the Newt position - that poor work habits are rampant and a destructive societal fact - as being the usual GOP heartlessness, when, the conversation finally matures it will be realized that it was a Gingrich, George Patton soldier - get off your ass - moment.

In his campaign, Obama will portray Newt's position (that poor work ethic is rampant in our society today and destructive to society) as being just as heartless as the GOP usually is. However, history will portray Gingrich in the same way as George Patton; both will be considered men who motivated others to get off their asses.

as for as a Clinton / Gingrich comparison - recapturing the house, fit these points in - Clinton said he will have a administration that looks like America. Gingrich, just made the point, it will be Americans working together that will be the look.

Comparisons have been made between 2012 and 1996, given that both times an incumbent Democrat was running for reelection after his party lost the House of Representatives two years before. Back then, Bill Clinton said that his government would reflect the composition of the American population. Newt Gingrich does not concern himself with such things; for him, what is important is that Americans work together.

That is, it appears he wants to have a election that will be of a coalition - house & senate - with an already established policies/platform presented in Jay-Madison-Hamilton format...
 ...it's how it could be, if, their were a press that would understand the conversation/argument and accepted the forwarded info. It would not fit the/their democrat progressive party political affiliation position.

Gingrich does not just want to win the presidency. He intends to see a united and coherent Republican Party elected at the same time to control the House and the Senate. The party should have clear, public policies presented in a platform structured similarly to The Federalist. This would be possible if the media were to simply accept whatever the government might tell them. Unfortunately, because the media is composed of progressives who are affiliated with the Democratic Party, it is unlikely that they would blindly accept whatever Republicans tell them.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 09, 2011, 01:26:43 PM
Props to Xahar ! :D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on December 09, 2011, 02:24:27 PM

>:(  I hope you trip and fall spectacularly and are mostly unhurt except for permanently disfiguring your nose so people silently think to themselves "that's why he sounds so nasally when he talks."
Damn. He got served Minnesota style.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on December 10, 2011, 01:15:29 AM
There's another Saturday night debate? How silly.

They are having it directly on SNL, to save time.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 10, 2011, 03:44:26 PM
Context needed



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 10, 2011, 05:19:23 PM
Seriously folks? Colonizing the moon?!?!? How can #2 not be the most absurd?

I don't know about you, but I'd rather colonize the moon than reinstating child labor.

I'd like to colonize the moon with child laborers.  We could put them to work making mirrors to illuminate our streets.  That way, if any secular atheists tried to drive up to Ground Zero to build a mosque, we'd be able to catch them, and any plans they have to impose sharia law would wither on the vine.

Of course, I'd only sign onto this plan if I can go to the Moon myself to inspect the work of the child laborers.  But only if I can ride there in Moon Force One, in the front of the rocket, and we can take off from the Greek cruise ship I'll be on, where I'm doing some work for Freddie Mac as a historian, and yelling at reporters who ask me debate questions.

Yeah, that's the plan.  Call it a "Contract with the Moon".  What do you think?  Is this going to work or does it involve too much right wing social engineering?  As long as it isn't guided by a Kenyan anti-colonial worldview, I think we're OK.  Hopefully, this plan will preclude Bob Livingston from going after my job, or my having to pay any $300,000 fines for ethics violations.





Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: FEMA Camp Administrator on December 10, 2011, 05:34:39 PM
From the "Gingrich Raped a Cow" thread in 2012:

Uh-oh. Would President Gingrich build a fundamental, transformative Labyrinth for the resulting Minotaur?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 11, 2011, 06:43:18 AM
Click for context

I'd like to colonize the moon with child laborers.  We could put them to work making mirrors to illuminate our streets.  That way, if any secular atheists tried to drive up to Ground Zero to build a mosque, we'd be able to catch them, and any plans they have to impose sharia law would wither on the vine.

Of course, I'd only sign onto this plan if I can go to the Moon myself to inspect the work of the child laborers.  But only if I can ride there in Moon Force One, in the front of the rocket, and we can take off from the Greek cruise ship I'll be on, where I'm doing some work for Freddie Mac as a historian, and yelling at reporters who ask me debate questions.

Yeah, that's the plan.  Call it a "Contract with the Moon".  What do you think?  Is this going to work or does it involve too much right wing social engineering?  As long as it isn't guided by a Kenyan anti-colonial worldview, I think we're OK.  Hopefully, this plan will preclude Bob Livingston from going after my job, or my having to pay any $300,000 fines for ethics violations.

Already posted. Please look 2 posts above.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on December 11, 2011, 11:11:25 AM
Ah yes, I see he partook in that cherished tradition of American male conservative politicians -- sucking cock.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: RI on December 11, 2011, 06:36:43 PM
From the master himself:

Feeling bored and a little narcissistic...

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on December 11, 2011, 07:22:33 PM
Click for context

I'd like to colonize the moon with child laborers.  We could put them to work making mirrors to illuminate our streets.  That way, if any secular atheists tried to drive up to Ground Zero to build a mosque, we'd be able to catch them, and any plans they have to impose sharia law would wither on the vine.

Of course, I'd only sign onto this plan if I can go to the Moon myself to inspect the work of the child laborers.  But only if I can ride there in Moon Force One, in the front of the rocket, and we can take off from the Greek cruise ship I'll be on, where I'm doing some work for Freddie Mac as a historian, and yelling at reporters who ask me debate questions.

Yeah, that's the plan.  Call it a "Contract with the Moon".  What do you think?  Is this going to work or does it involve too much right wing social engineering?  As long as it isn't guided by a Kenyan anti-colonial worldview, I think we're OK.  Hopefully, this plan will preclude Bob Livingston from going after my job, or my having to pay any $300,000 fines for ethics violations.

Already posted. Please look 2 posts above.

Ah, sorry.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on December 11, 2011, 08:13:31 PM

Christ, man, even in the wintertime you go around in nothing more than tiny woman's T-shirts 3 sizes too small?  Were are your woolens?  Your comfy jumpers?  Your plaid shirtings?  I wear more clothes than you and I'm in the tropics (though nowadays it gets down to 15 degrees Celsionic every night.

You must basically live in the gym pumping iron afleitch.  Well done!  :)

I could not get those biceps/triceps at my age no matter how hard I tried, and I have been doing my best. Getting old sucks! 

What's the point of having those things?  I don't see the appeal.  There's only one body part that is really beneficial to have in XL, and there's nothing you can do about that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on December 12, 2011, 01:16:40 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=145163.msg3117939#msg3117939


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 12, 2011, 08:51:24 AM
Click for context

I'd like to colonize the moon with child laborers.  We could put them to work making mirrors to illuminate our streets.  That way, if any secular atheists tried to drive up to Ground Zero to build a mosque, we'd be able to catch them, and any plans they have to impose sharia law would wither on the vine.

Of course, I'd only sign onto this plan if I can go to the Moon myself to inspect the work of the child laborers.  But only if I can ride there in Moon Force One, in the front of the rocket, and we can take off from the Greek cruise ship I'll be on, where I'm doing some work for Freddie Mac as a historian, and yelling at reporters who ask me debate questions.

Yeah, that's the plan.  Call it a "Contract with the Moon".  What do you think?  Is this going to work or does it involve too much right wing social engineering?  As long as it isn't guided by a Kenyan anti-colonial worldview, I think we're OK.  Hopefully, this plan will preclude Bob Livingston from going after my job, or my having to pay any $300,000 fines for ethics violations.

Already posted. Please look 2 posts above.

Ah, sorry.

No problem. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 12, 2011, 12:36:08 PM
He just really wants to be President.

I think we should give Mitt benefit of the doubt. Why to accuse him of dirty politicizing if there's another, medical, explanation of his behavior over the years?

I think that wanting to be President is a mental disorder itself.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on December 12, 2011, 03:55:55 PM
I'm actually in the process of writing him a personal letter right now XD...

Ron Paul walks the walk. He does not come across as "flashy" or charismatic. He is not a great debater. But he does come off like a grandfather figure. He comes across like a Church deacon who always says the right thing at the right time. He does not encourage violence, but challenges the establishment openly and loudly.

In a way, we could ask "what was Martin Luther Kings appeal", or "what was Barack Obamas appeal?". They gave people hope. Paul gives me hope. In 2007, when I was 11, my Grandma took me to see Rudy Giuliani. I shook his hand yada yada, but he never inspired me. I just believed that all Arabs were terrorist, and that Bush was good, and Clinton was a Communist, etc. Then my Grandpa passed away. My Grandpa lived in North Carolina, and I never was close as I should of been with him, so I got a hard (yet, not overly depressing) lesson in life and death. Soon I realized that this is just a fraction of what a mother who finds our her son died in Iraq feels. I started to become anti war, and by the time I joined here, I was pretty much a complete Paultard.

Paul's appeal is that he really isn't appealing. If he believed in what Rudy, Mitt, and McCain believed in, he would just be another Duncan Hunter. But he is not. He sticks out, and he does not abuse religion (which makes me love him more, being "born again" since Spring) for gain, he does not make fiery speeches, he simply spreads a good, Christian, peacefull message.

That's why he appeals to me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on December 12, 2011, 04:36:36 PM
I'm actually in the process of writing him a personal letter right now XD...

Ron Paul walks the walk. He does not come across as "flashy" or charismatic. He is not a great debater. But he does come off like a grandfather figure. He comes across like a Church deacon who always says the right thing at the right time. He does not encourage violence, but challenges the establishment openly and loudly.

In a way, we could ask "what was Martin Luther Kings appeal", or "what was Barack Obamas appeal?". They gave people hope. Paul gives me hope. In 2007, when I was 11, my Grandma took me to see Rudy Giuliani. I shook his hand yada yada, but he never inspired me. I just believed that all Arabs were terrorist, and that Bush was good, and Clinton was a Communist, etc. Then my Grandpa passed away. My Grandpa lived in North Carolina, and I never was close as I should of been with him, so I got a hard (yet, not overly depressing) lesson in life and death. Soon I realized that this is just a fraction of what a mother who finds our her son died in Iraq feels. I started to become anti war, and by the time I joined here, I was pretty much a complete Paultard.

Paul's appeal is that he really isn't appealing. If he believed in what Rudy, Mitt, and McCain believed in, he would just be another Duncan Hunter. But he is not. He sticks out, and he does not abuse religion (which makes me love him more, being "born again" since Spring) for gain, he does not make fiery speeches, he simply spreads a good, Christian, peacefull message.

That's why he appeals to me.

Clearly the Paul campaign's youth brainwashing program has been successful. Yikes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on December 12, 2011, 06:24:13 PM
The highest best [sic] I ever made was with a guy who was supervising a project when I was still in the lumber business... we bet $250 on who could make it longer after we each put 3 tablespoons of laxative in a cup of coffee and drank it.... I lost a lot of money that day


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 13, 2011, 11:32:54 AM
I also found Ron Paul's argument that Newty was factually correct because the Palestinians never had a "State" to be retarded. A people doesn't need a state to be a people.

Obviously, Kurdish are invented people as well.

Of course. They're actually just Mountain Turks, don't you know anything about SCIENCE?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 14, 2011, 08:27:51 AM
Some sort of jealous duck would my guess.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on December 14, 2011, 04:35:38 PM
An extremely dangerous individual who must be dealt with at some point.

I heard he is a coprophiliac who likes to get sex and then stiff the girl. 

That is a vile lie. I always take care to kill them first. I feel that is the gentleman way to go about it.

Funny cause it's true.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on December 14, 2011, 04:51:12 PM
An extremely dangerous individual who must be dealt with at some point.

I heard he is a coprophiliac who likes to get sex and then stiff the girl. 

That is a vile lie. I always take care to kill them first. I feel that is the gentleman way to go about it.

Funny cause it's true.

You guys do know that 'stiff the girl' means to not pay her, right?  It doesn't mean to make her into a 'stiff'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on December 14, 2011, 04:53:16 PM
An extremely dangerous individual who must be dealt with at some point.

I heard he is a coprophiliac who likes to get sex and then stiff the girl. 

That is a vile lie. I always take care to kill them first. I feel that is the gentleman way to go about it.

Funny cause it's true.

You guys do know that 'stiff the girl' means to not pay her, right?  It doesn't mean to make her into a 'stiff'.
I do, Gustaf doesn't. Anyways he kills them first and stiffs them after.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on December 14, 2011, 08:04:36 PM
If Jesus Christ met opebo, how would He act? Would He be like Gustaf?

Quote from: Jesus of Nazareth
O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on December 14, 2011, 09:36:52 PM
Much have I travelled in the realms of gold,
And many sickly states and kingdoms seen;
Round many ethereal islands have I been
Which bards in fealty to Romney hold.
Oft of one wide expanse had I been told
That deep-browed Gingrich ruled as his demesne;
Yet did I never breathe this unserene
Till I heard Politico speak out bold:
Then felt I like some reader of the Times
When a new candidate swims into his ken;
Or like Pawlenty when with eagle eyes
He stared at the caucus — and all his big names
Looked at each other with a wild surmise —
Silent, atop a tractor in Ames.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on December 15, 2011, 04:56:09 PM
Great Ron Paul Youtube comments that sum up his supporters:
Quote
There is a guy that developed a online game. He is donating $5 for each person that kills the white dragon (very easy). If you broke like I am it's an easy way to donate without spending what you don't have. I did it with four different email addresses (that's $20 that didn't come out of my pocket). the address is dungeoneers(dot)com/ronpaul . Thumbs up to keep this going.

Quote
I'm only 15 and don't have a credit card or anything for me to be able to donate but I will see if my mom or dad can take some on my money I've been saving and donate it. I might not be old enough to vote but I will make sure I still do my part!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 16, 2011, 02:34:11 PM
Context:

Shouldn't this thread be in the Atlas board?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on December 16, 2011, 10:46:43 PM
Quote
"This is a traditional Labour seat. Labour should be doing really well. We would expect them, in a standstill position, to be getting a swing of anywhere between 15% to 18%. Unless they do that they have gone backwards."

J. J.?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on December 16, 2011, 10:49:14 PM
"The BRTD ghetto" sounds cruel until you think about how much BRTD likes slums. And then, you get to thinking how cruel it would be to not create a BRTD ghetto.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 18, 2011, 02:52:34 AM
You don't need to be in the pew every sunday to know that there’s something wrong in this country when Rick Perry can get away with wearing the jacket from Brokeback Mountain, but gay Republicans can't openly buy porn in Toronto.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 18, 2011, 04:19:45 AM
Quote
Gingrich was the choice of one-third of the 400 Oklahoma Republicans interviewed by SoonerPoll.com from Nov. 17 to Dec. 16.

Leave it to an Oklahoman pollster to take a month to survey 400 people.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 18, 2011, 06:50:09 AM
Funny cuz it's true

The new anti-Romney is, in fact, Romney.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on December 18, 2011, 04:48:30 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on December 19, 2011, 11:03:26 AM
Well, there you have it. The stock market likes Kim Jong II, and hates low unemployment rates. Not much more to say there.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on December 19, 2011, 03:27:00 PM
Rumors flying that Romney has surged to 5.2 on the jmfcstrade.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 19, 2011, 05:13:19 PM
Context

He could discuss the role of the gays in the German military with Guido Westerwelle.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on December 21, 2011, 01:42:09 AM
My general impression of Austria is that it is a very conservative country + Vienna.  It's not conservative in the bible thumping, slain in the spirit, I'ma kill u cuz u gay type of way... but in the "oh, we have Thursday off from class because it's St. Barniferous day.. the saint that saved the village of Rottenegg from a cholera epidemic in 1322 by holding the entire population in isolated holding cells with no water to drink for 5 days!

LOL


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 21, 2011, 02:33:46 AM
One-issue candidates never get 'flavor of the month' status.  That's exactly why Santorum has never been able to rise to the top.

Of course he isn't a single issue candidate! He hates gays and abortion!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 21, 2011, 06:22:46 AM
Bashar, Mahmoud, Omar Al-Bashir, Hu Jintao, Mladic, Karadzic, most African rulers, most Central Asian rulers, Al-Qaeda & friends, SCAF, Putin and Tim Hudak.

(sorry Steve, you haven't pissed me off enough to make this list)

;D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 21, 2011, 07:02:33 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on December 21, 2011, 07:28:24 AM
No word on the by-election in the Dear Leader's constituency number 333? I am looking forward to knowing which illustrious comrade the Korean People will elect to replace the very regretted Shining Star of Paektu Mountain.

Does North Korea use FPTP?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on December 21, 2011, 07:30:28 AM
The problematic part is that he had to be waterboarded before he'd renounce support of torture.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on December 21, 2011, 08:27:21 AM
I still don't like Florence with the western edge of the state. There's not even a contiguous road connection.

Mathis has gone bezerk.

She really believes she can get away with anything.

She is a rabid, foaming at the mouth Democrat, as well as a liar and cheat.

The congressional districting proposal she supports will be struck down by the courts.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on December 21, 2011, 03:04:05 PM
No word on the by-election in the Dear Leader's constituency number 333? I am looking forward to knowing which illustrious comrade the Korean People will elect to replace the very regretted Shining Star of Paektu Mountain.

Does North Korea use FPTP?
The funny part is that North Korea uses FPTP for their as-many-candidates-as-seats-elections. Yes, they actually went to the trouble of dividing the country into 680odd constituencies. Couldn't they just run a list?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 21, 2011, 03:56:46 PM
Ask any woman on the street if they enjoy anal intercourse.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on December 22, 2011, 01:11:43 PM
You know it's a good poll because it has decimal points.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on December 24, 2011, 07:42:13 AM
I hope you signed like any good American would have.

I dislike Paul, but not as much as I like democracy;

if there were any one quote to summarize ben's posting history.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 25, 2011, 04:12:20 AM
New Pennsylvania numbers:

Asked of any woman on the street: Do you enjoy anal intercourse?

Yes .......................................................... 2%
No ........................................................... 5%
Get the hell away from me, you creep .... 93%

Adding this to the map we can see that there is still a clear national trend toward "get the hell away from me, you creep." Bad news for President Obama.

(
)



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 25, 2011, 04:32:54 PM
I'm surprised nobody reported this.

While looking at the latest polling data, I'm seriously beginning to feel that Congressman Ron Paul of Texas could actually win the first contest of the nominating calendar.  It's looking like it will be between Ron Paul and Mitt Romney.  This is a first for me, as never before did I ever think that Rep. Paul had a chance in anything.

Is anybody else feeling the same way?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on December 25, 2011, 05:09:50 PM
I love how, in typical BushOK fashion, he refers to him as "Congressman Ron Paul of Texas."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 25, 2011, 05:52:31 PM
I love how, in typical BushOK fashion, he refers to him as "Congressman Ron Paul of Texas."

He's wrong.

Proper form is Dr. Paul.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on December 25, 2011, 05:56:14 PM
Dr. Congressman Ron Paul is correct. Show him his due respect.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on December 25, 2011, 06:10:41 PM
Dr. Congressman Ron Paul is correct. Show him his due respect.

Reverend Doctor Congressman Ron Paul


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on December 25, 2011, 08:35:55 PM
I feel kind of bad for finding this so funny.

I've been saying this for weeks now, frothy's day will come and it will come hard.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on December 25, 2011, 09:39:46 PM
Dr. Congressman Ron Paul is correct. Show him his due respect.

Reverend Doctor Congressman Ron Paul

His Majesty Doctor Reverend Messiah Congressman Ron Paul Manson Christ


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on December 25, 2011, 09:58:53 PM
With incredible analytical insight like this, I'm amazed Mr. Patel isn't given his proper dues:

2014 Elections Republicans are going to try to regain control of the US Senate.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on December 25, 2011, 10:17:56 PM
With incredible analytical insight like this, I'm amazed Mr. Patel isn't given his proper dues:

2014 Elections Republicans are going to try to regain control of the US Senate.
I wonder if anyone has bought the domain name nkpatel.com?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 26, 2011, 09:14:27 AM
Dr. Congressman Ron Paul is correct. Show him his due respect.

Reverend Doctor Congressman Ron Paul

His Majesty Doctor Reverend Messiah Congressman Ron Paul Manson Christ

The Doctor Who Consoles Tears of the Internet


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on December 26, 2011, 05:21:10 PM
Classic!

You Romney detractors will pounce on anything to demean and demonize this great man.

Shame, shame, shame on you!

I watched this video, and, actually, there can be no be no doubt but what this was absolutely hilarious.

Not only can Romney fix America's broken economy, but, as this video shows, he also has the common touch, and relates well with Mr. and Mrs. Average American.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on December 27, 2011, 09:54:46 AM
New Pennsylvania numbers:

Asked of any woman on the street: Do you enjoy anal intercourse?

Yes .......................................................... 2%
No ........................................................... 5%
Get the hell away from me, you creep .... 93%

Adding this to the map we can see that there is still a clear national trend toward "get the hell away from me, you creep." Bad news for President Obama.

(
)


Brilliance.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on December 27, 2011, 02:42:04 PM
Dr. Congressman Ron Paul is correct. Show him his due respect.

Reverend Doctor Congressman Ron Paul

His Majesty Doctor Reverend Messiah Congressman Ron Paul Manson Christ

The Doctor Who Consoles Tears of the Internet

Captain Ronald E. Paul


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on December 27, 2011, 05:23:46 PM
The extended family. We had two dozen people over at our place, plus a couple of babies.

Baby humans?  Those are also considered 'people' as I understand the law and custom.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on December 27, 2011, 05:57:58 PM
Dr. Congressman Ron Paul is correct. Show him his due respect.

Reverend Doctor Congressman Ron Paul

His Majesty Doctor Reverend Messiah Congressman Ron Paul Manson Christ

The Doctor Who Consoles Tears of the Internet

Captain Ronald E. Paul

Major Doctor Ron Paul of the Royal Marine Corpse.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on December 27, 2011, 06:55:27 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on December 28, 2011, 03:17:21 PM
Also, have you noticed the size of the brain?

Peeperkorn only votes for dolichocephalic candidates.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on December 28, 2011, 08:07:47 PM
"what about 54?"

It was open in the 1970s and then closed down because the owner was a crook and then it pretty much failed. They made a bad movie about it in the '90s with Mike Myers, Ryan Phillipe, and Neve Campbell.


Thanks. So the key i have been given is wrong.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on December 28, 2011, 11:16:54 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on December 29, 2011, 06:24:57 AM
Context



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on December 29, 2011, 08:02:21 AM
If you have ever been accosted by a committed Ron Paul supporter, you know how unbelievably thick-headed they can be.

EDIT: And, from the gay marriage thread, all of which could be entered in either here or the Deluge -

The government can define "marriage" however it wants to, but this is how I define "real biological and technical marriage" which is "vaginal intercourse that produces a biological child and determines the roles and responsibilities of the 2 biological parents in providing for that child."

Apparently I'm one broken condom and court order away from accidental marriage


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on December 29, 2011, 09:05:54 AM
New Pennsylvania numbers:

Asked of any woman on the street: Do you enjoy anal intercourse?

Yes .......................................................... 2%
No ........................................................... 5%
Get the hell away from me, you creep .... 93%

Adding this to the map we can see that there is still a clear national trend toward "get the hell away from me, you creep." Bad news for President Obama.

(
)


Brilliance.

Truly. My favorite is the subtle detail that the "yes" vote is slightly higher in Nevada. ;D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on December 29, 2011, 09:35:43 AM
New Pennsylvania numbers:

Asked of any woman on the street: Do you enjoy anal intercourse?

Yes .......................................................... 2%
No ........................................................... 5%
Get the hell away from me, you creep .... 93%

Adding this to the map we can see that there is still a clear national trend toward "get the hell away from me, you creep." Bad news for President Obama.

(
)


Brilliance.

Truly. My favorite is the subtle detail that the "yes" vote is slightly higher in Nevada. ;D

Definitely one of the best posts here.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on December 29, 2011, 11:28:30 PM
Rick Perry would be posting partially completed statements because he couldn't remember the rest of what he wanted to say.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on December 30, 2011, 09:18:57 AM
Quote
Eight-month-old Cooper Wall Wagner, son of Capt. Greg Wagner, got up close and personal with the president, grabbing his face, then sticking his fingers in Obama's mouth.

What the hell do we even pay the Secret Service for?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on January 02, 2012, 10:17:34 AM
The second page? Come on guys step it up.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on January 02, 2012, 10:26:48 AM
Let me ask, I heard some people say it might have been Kucinich vs President McCain 2012. Any way that could have happened?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on January 02, 2012, 04:48:50 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 03, 2012, 06:20:11 AM
I guess.  The girl I have a stupid crush on smokes like a locomotive, and I think she looks smexy doing it.

Is that like a sexy Mexican?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 03, 2012, 07:26:14 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=146325.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on January 03, 2012, 07:44:40 AM
So what?  Rich people don't need toilets, as nobody rich has an anus.

I grinned. Is that a bad thing?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on January 03, 2012, 08:08:48 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=146325.0

Damn, you beat me on it ! :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on January 03, 2012, 03:24:05 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=146325.0

Damn, you beat me on it ! :P

It's getting better and better.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 03, 2012, 06:27:28 PM
I mean, if that had really happened the US government wouldn't have hunted Osama bin Laden to death, they would have nominated him for the Nobel Price for Architecture.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on January 03, 2012, 10:51:47 PM
Censored to protect Inks's delicate sensibilities

19:48   BRTD83   BUT F-CKING PERRY WON COUNTIES
19:48   BRTD83   WHAT THE F-CK
19:48   BRTD83   WHAT THE F-CK IS WRONG WITH THOSE F-CKING PEOPLE
19:48   BRTD83   WHAT TYPE OF F-CKING MORON WOULD VOTE FOR PERRY


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CatoMinor on January 04, 2012, 03:35:19 AM
NH is a long week and two major debates away.

It wouldn't be unusual if Santorum came from behind.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 04, 2012, 03:38:57 AM
Censored to protect Inks's delicate sensibilities

19:48   BRTD83   BUT F-CKING PERRY WON COUNTIES
19:48   BRTD83   WHAT THE F-CK
19:48   BRTD83   WHAT THE F-CK IS WRONG WITH THOSE F-CKING PEOPLE
19:48   BRTD83   WHAT TYPE OF F-CKING MORON WOULD VOTE FOR PERRY


Later part of Mormons was better.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on January 04, 2012, 05:12:22 AM
From now on, the name Santorum will be synonymous with coming in #2.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 04, 2012, 06:19:06 AM

Alright, can we just agree that King wins the forum?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on January 04, 2012, 08:37:09 AM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on January 04, 2012, 03:31:48 PM
()

Iowa's new district map kind of looks like a swastika.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on January 04, 2012, 04:48:53 PM
Just heard her announce that she's dropping out on the TV.


Even so, let's wait til we hear something from a reliable source.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on January 06, 2012, 01:13:53 AM
lulz

Only Bushie can use "vote for the person" reasoning and come up with Mitt Romney as the best choice.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on January 07, 2012, 04:57:44 AM
Al really isn't that witty or whatever.  He's just an unpleasant, arrogant flake.

I resent being called a 'flake'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on January 07, 2012, 11:05:48 PM
"people who take jobs away from us"

Like Bain Capital under Mitt?

European-style class warfare does not work in America.


I bet his record and image will really help him in these states.

@Mitt Romney: THE TOP TAX RATE THEN WAS 90% AHBEIREHILAALAGALBAREAGANRAISEDTAXES12TIMESAGLABLABGRARGALABRARG

The last time a presidential candidate tried making class warfare their central plank, the result was this:

()

Ah, I remember Comrade Mondale's speech at the 1984 DNC.

"Down with the demons of capitalism-fascism! The proletariat and the downtrodden must slice the head off the dragon-fascist Reagan! Long live the global Soviet Union!"

()

Sorry for the self-insert.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on January 08, 2012, 12:15:54 PM
how I've missed angus

Can someone translate what Hunstman just said?

Just like he said after it was "he doesn't understand the situation." However when I initially heard it I thought he butchered the last word (said something like "qingsheng" instead of qingkuang 情况) so someone gimme a link so I can hear it again.

Huntsman said "qingxing," which is the way you say 情况 in the south (Guangdong and Hong Kong, and maybe some in Taiwan use this term too).  Since Huntsman learned how to speak Chinese in Taiwan, it's not surprising he prefers southern vocabulary.  He said the sentence just right.

I was only in China twice, and the last time was two years ago, so my mandarin's a little rusty, but I thought he said, "You're a goddamned liar, Mitt.  I heard you order the spring roll platter and now that the waiter has brought it, you're claiming that you ordered the Mao Po Dou Fu." 

Anyway, I can't believe that none of youse are gonna bug the chinaman about this, seeing as how we have been doing his homework for the past five years.  I'm assuming his English is better than the guy's who writes the tests he has to take. 

More importantly, I found out that the slow-talking woman's name is Dianne Sawyer. 
 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on January 08, 2012, 02:12:17 PM
If anyone is watching this, Romney is getting hit by just about everyone.

perhaps they held off last night with the plan of ganging up on him today, knowing he'd be the only one on stage without the benefit of caffeine.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on January 08, 2012, 03:50:34 PM
^^^legendary post right there.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on January 08, 2012, 04:53:33 PM
BushOK doesn't need math...

Wow, mine add up to exactly 100% and I didn't even try to do that.


Boss.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on January 08, 2012, 05:02:06 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=146325.0

Damn, you beat me on it ! :P

It's getting better and better.

Syria's on Tuesday!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on January 09, 2012, 12:44:05 AM
Comments sections are virtually always depressing because people are horrible retards and the planet is doomed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on January 09, 2012, 12:50:46 AM
lulz

Only Bushie can use "vote for the person" reasoning and come up with Mitt Romney as the best choice.

That'd be more appropriate for a hypothetical "brutal truth" mine.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on January 09, 2012, 01:01:10 AM
If Joe wants to have 2 girlfriends, well, that's fine legally.

And if Joe gets his 2 girlfriends pregnant, that's also fine legally.

Now, if 2 different women are pregnant with Joe's children, maybe it'd make sense for them to move in together.

If Joe lives with his 2 girlfriends, and his 2 children by 2 different women, that would also be fine legally.

I endorse this scenario.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on January 09, 2012, 11:22:32 AM
Anybody know how many posters still have to report?

Apparently people are claiming that some posters have been thrown in the Mississippi.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on January 10, 2012, 03:45:38 PM
My mom was running a bath for me, and there was some hubbub on the news in the other room.  I asked her what it was, and she told me that President Bush had lost an election to a man named Clinton.  I asked her if this was good or bad, and she just shrugged and carried on running the bath.  That shaped a lot of my political outlook right there.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on January 11, 2012, 03:11:37 PM
Obama receives only 82% of the vote in the New Hampshire primary!!!111

Not a sign of strength for Obama; it is not a sign of disaster, either.  If you look at the two of those within range, Clinton and Bush II, you are looking at 49% and 51% of the vote.  Obama is a candidate that is weakening, as compared to 2008.  Weakening is not the same as losing.

Romney showed a great deal of strength here, not only winning, doing it with a fairly large margin, easily above 15 points and a with a better turnout than 2008.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Linus Van Pelt on January 11, 2012, 03:13:13 PM
(scenario under which Romney could lose)

3) In the next debate, Gingrich or Santorum turns to Romney and says "I always lie". Romney crashes and smoke comes out of his ears. His aides frantically reboot him, but his memory has been wiped clean. Not knowing who he is or what he's doing, Romney is forced to end his campaign for the Presidency. Perry, baffled by the sentence, drops out in confusion.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 11, 2012, 04:44:23 PM

I've gone through all of them quickly:

Denial was seeing the first returns.
Anger was "Why aren't they voting for him!?!"
Bargaining was "I'll accept my own misfortune if he can win. Second? How about second!?"
Depression was overnight
Acceptance- I'm getting there


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on January 11, 2012, 10:22:46 PM
I never swear in public, but when it's just me and my cat, and I'm angry, my cat has to run and hide and cover his ears.  I'm trying to turn d***it into more doggonit's.  When I'm in public I use words that my paternal grandmother would use, if she were alive, such as "shucks" and "fiddle-sticks".  I also use the phrase "Geminee Christmas" quite a bit.  Whenever I go into a rage at home, usually over trivial stuff, I can make a Navy sailor look holy.  I'm trying to stop that and I always end up being brought to my knees and asking forgiveness from my God for my dirty mouth.

I hate cussing, personally, because with the same mouth I use to sing praises to God or talk about Him, I also talk like the world.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 13, 2012, 06:29:30 AM
No one in his campaign realized that this was a poor picture for a campaign website?

Well, to Gingrich's credit, he actually knows what Auschwitz was. I don't think we can say the same for Rick Perry for example.

"Here we are at a major car manufacturer in Poland.  Years ago people were driving Auschwitz cars everywhere, but thanks to the socialist, Marxist, European pro-tax agenda of the government, this factory was shut down and hundreds of workers lost their jobs.  If Obama has his way, the same thing could happen to Ford, or GM, or... uh..... some other company.  Oops."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on January 13, 2012, 02:31:25 PM
I never swear in public, but when it's just me and my cat, and I'm angry, my cat has to run and hide and cover his ears.  I'm trying to turn d***it into more doggonit's.  When I'm in public I use words that my paternal grandmother would use, if she were alive, such as "shucks" and "fiddle-sticks".  I also use the phrase "Geminee Christmas" quite a bit.  Whenever I go into a rage at home, usually over trivial stuff, I can make a Navy sailor look holy.  I'm trying to stop that and I always end up being brought to my knees and asking forgiveness from my God for my dirty mouth.

I hate cussing, personally, because with the same mouth I use to sing praises to God or talk about Him, I also talk like the world.

A new classic!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on January 16, 2012, 01:32:37 AM
Al, what do you think about Tim Tebow? Should Denver stick with him next year, or should they get a different quarterback?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 16, 2012, 04:58:16 AM

Context


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on January 16, 2012, 05:52:41 AM
How do you know the toothbrush was invented in West Virginia?

Because it isn't called a teethbrush.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 16, 2012, 09:50:17 AM
How do you know the toothbrush was invented in West Virginia?

Because it isn't called a teethbrush.

lololololol


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on January 16, 2012, 03:53:54 PM
Al, what do you think about Tim Tebow? Should Denver stick with him next year, or should they get a different quarterback?

Guess which one they picked, Joe?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on January 16, 2012, 09:01:49 PM
I have no idea about Tim Tebow, whoever he is.  The funny part was who it was addressed to.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on January 17, 2012, 12:34:25 PM
…yet Thurston is the only dude smart enough to have money and get pussy. 

Well, perhaps, but that means that the only p. being gotten was Mrs. Howell.  She wasn't so bad, but after all its hardly as if Thurston were really enjoying life and at the same time the two young cutie-pies were totally going to waste.  What the Island needed was prostitution.

emphasis mine


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on January 17, 2012, 05:32:45 PM
I have no idea about Tim Tebow, whoever he is.  The funny part was who it was addressed to.

I think it would be fun to hear Al's thoughts about the NFL.

He was in a relationship with someone he delivered? That's kind of gross.

Karen Santorum = Ron Swanson


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: exopolitician on January 17, 2012, 08:39:53 PM
Romney will be accepting the nomination with Mount Rushmore as the backdrop, as he, of course, is the heir to the Presidents portrayed on that historic edifice.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on January 17, 2012, 11:04:30 PM
I have a morbid sence of humor.


Like all the other candidates dying in a plane crash.  That's pretty much the only way.

Mitt Romney's plane and Rick Santorum's plane have a midair collision and the debris lands on Newt Gingrich?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on January 18, 2012, 07:34:21 AM
A Republican attack ad that might not be God's honest truth? Excuse me while I clutch my pearls in shock.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on January 18, 2012, 07:43:41 AM
A Republican attack ad that might not be God's honest truth? Excuse me while I clutch my pearls in shock.
You know, I thought of opening the thread just to type something along those lines, but decided it wasn't worth it as I would have to crossread it to see if the joke had been done already and I couldn't bear to read the presumably inane serious replies.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on January 18, 2012, 12:01:15 PM
A Republican attack ad that might not be God's honest truth? Excuse me while I clutch my pearls in shock.
You know, I thought of opening the thread just to type something along those lines, but decided it wasn't worth it as I would have to crossread it to see if the joke had been done already and I couldn't bear to read the presumably inane serious replies.

The closest thing to a serious reply there is Ernest who just pointed out that by Romney's standards you can't blame Newt directly for the ad, so it's not as bad as expected.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on January 18, 2012, 02:54:19 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on January 18, 2012, 03:27:02 PM
Sarah Jessica Parker does have a face like a horse.  And bad hair.  But her body was nice enough when she was younger.  There's really no accounting for taste.  When I was in elementary school the President had a daughter my age.  Her name was Amy Carter.  I had a crush on her, even though she's rather hideous.  Profoundly so, in fact.  She looks a bit like Roger the alien in drag.

There's really no accounting for tastes.  But Sarah did have a firm, muscular ass when she was younger.  Put a bag over her head and she's not bad at all. 



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on January 18, 2012, 09:23:57 PM
SJP's appeal is very urban, many people would not understand.

why is that?  because most people in the suburbs see an occasional horse or two here and there and make the connection?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on January 18, 2012, 11:30:07 PM
"....I never said it was Newt who let the dogs out..."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on January 19, 2012, 02:11:26 AM
I think everybody here knows every single meme.  To categorize and explain them would only send a dangerous message that we welcome new members into our community.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on January 19, 2012, 04:32:37 AM
Dude are going to spam this forum again     how about one single thread for every one of your Romney-schilling hyperbole

Yeah, seriously.

Seconded. Politico has become worse than the plague.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on January 19, 2012, 12:17:40 PM
Get a life who cares you must be a lonely man who gets a thrill of negativity. Politico is in love with mitt romney go back and look at all his postings. Are you a secret lover politico


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on January 19, 2012, 12:58:37 PM
Does this mean Newt would be open to supporting polygamy.  Could be an interesting way to outflank Romney when the very competitive Utah primary rolls around.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 19, 2012, 02:10:47 PM

I don't know about anyone else, but as someone who really hasn't had one set person to support throughout this nominating process, I find myself disgusted at the relentless attacks on Governor Romney that I see on this forum.

Newt Gingrich is clearly a candidate with baggage and that is an understatement. Rick Santorum would be acceptable to me. Other than that you have Ron Paul, who is only a "contender" because he is anti-war and for legalizing drugs. Period. All the young people I talk to who like Ron Paul are against the wars and want legalized marijuana. Period. There is nothing else. Why else would young people support a 76 year old Republican?

Governor Romney worked at Bain Capitol. Do you know how lucky any person would be to have a job like that? A career in business? I would be dancing a jig if I knew I'd have a job at a place like that. But it seems that the liberals enjoy painting "Bain" as some sort of dark and sinister corporation.

They also attacked Romney for saying "Corporations are People". Well, let me tell you something. I've been working as a waiter for a year and a half. I am one insignificant cog in the whole corporate spiral. But in a way, I understand what he means. If the corporation failed, my store would close, I'd be out of work.

But to my fellow Republicans, PLEASE, enough attacking Romney. He will be our nominee and the choice between the handout, no hard work-entitlement President Barack Obama and between a successful businessman turned Governor Mitt Romney is no contest.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on January 19, 2012, 04:17:39 PM
Have a great birthday, old man.  Maybe your buddies will chip in and get you a hooker this weekend.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on January 19, 2012, 06:34:38 PM
Seriously, Gingrich better not screw this up.

And Santorum better not spend all his time attacking Gingrich. We already know Paul will, because he's basically just Romney's sidekick in these things at this point.

Yeah, Paul is Romney's Flava Flav. Notice that he's started wearing a giant nugget of gold on a chain around his neck and saying things like "yeaaah boyeee" after Romney speaks.




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on January 19, 2012, 10:24:36 PM
I'm mentally working toward a vast, systematic criticism of you, Al.  just realize it's only so 1) because you're one of the top 3 or so posters here and 2) it won't be out for several months,


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on January 21, 2012, 02:14:41 PM
You would rather be greased by a different character?
Quite, quite. Though not if I had to develop psoriatic arthropathy first. Not worth it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on January 21, 2012, 11:18:52 PM
Also:

70% of MN voters have no clue what SOPA is ...

"SOPA, ya, that's Campbell's soup made with jello, eh?"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on January 21, 2012, 11:53:46 PM
I have to say, quite a few of the non-native speakers here can write English better than I can.

In fairness, you are an American.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on January 22, 2012, 01:22:48 PM
Wealth is something to be admired and pursued, not vilified and redistributed. This is America, not Europe.

Romney did not inherit his father's wealth. Did Gingrich inherit his mother's health?

I had intended to post this into the Deluge with a note that I wasn't quite sure if it didn't actually belong here instead, since it's so lost in its own world that it's actually funny; but the wonkwejts closed that down.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on January 22, 2012, 07:45:05 PM
Context:

Nigga cop-killas representin' in da apple juice industry!

GANGSTA FOR REAL


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on January 22, 2012, 08:21:22 PM

I lol'd.  It was a fitting reply to one of the most ridiculous scenarios (and post) ever on this forum. That is saying a lot with the likes of phk and brtd around.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on January 23, 2012, 04:21:21 AM
From the same thread:

RFKochambeau might be the strangest poster here.

I don't think he's autistic though.  He's just Canadian.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on January 23, 2012, 07:30:29 PM
Unintentional:



Intentional:

It's a good thing that Ron Paul reads this forum, otherwise this thread would look a little silly.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 23, 2012, 08:53:32 PM
Is she also a ginger? Is it easier for gingers to score gingers? Or do they like to date out of their ethnic group?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Negusa Nagast 🚀 on January 23, 2012, 11:17:40 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on January 24, 2012, 02:17:06 AM
Wait, a Lord Spiritual actually did something?!

I like to think that they were all sitting down to afternoon tea in the gardens of their respective Bishops Palaces when all of them heard (no doubt on Radio Four) that the government intended to include child benefit in the cap. And that then, and all at once, they spat out a mouthful of tea in horror. There would probably also have been the audible clinking of fine bone china as the cups were put down, and faster than normal, in their respective saucers. Heads would have been shaken, and perhaps they would also have been put off their Madeira Cake, at least for that particular moment. Something, the all thought to themselves, simply must be done.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on January 24, 2012, 06:48:36 AM
WILL WE GET THE CANDIDATES' TAKE ON THE SPANISH-AMERICAN WAR SOON?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Marokai Backbeat on January 24, 2012, 08:51:59 AM
Only reason I ask is because many of you just see penis or sex references every where you look... like the Christian bookstore someone posted bout called Ram In The Bush


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 24, 2012, 06:57:25 PM
"Governor, the attacks on Romney for not releasing his tax returns are starting to bite."
Nikki Haley tossed her head defiantly, pulling out a Newport cigarette. The man offers her a light.
"Willard will know what to do." Her voice is brittle, uncertain.
The man leans in like a predator, and whispers gently in her ear. She smells of perfume.
"Nikki, the latest Public Policy Polling survey shows Gingrich taking the lead. That's why you should have stayed neutral, like me. I told you."
Nikki Haley takes a drag on her cigarette. "I am the Governor of this state, and I endorsed Romney," she whines, her voice croaking, suddenly she is blinking back tears.
"The people love me, damnit!"
The man suddenly kisses her full on the lips. It is Senator DeMint. They embrace.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 24, 2012, 08:10:18 PM
"Governor, the attacks on Romney for not releasing his tax returns are starting to bite."
Nikki Haley tossed her head defiantly, pulling out a Newport cigarette. The man offers her a light.
"Willard will know what to do." Her voice is brittle, uncertain.
The man leans in like a predator, and whispers gently in her ear. She smells of perfume.
"Nikki, the latest Public Policy Polling survey shows Gingrich taking the lead. That's why you should have stayed neutral, like me. I told you."
Nikki Haley takes a drag on her cigarette. "I am the Governor of this state, and I endorsed Romney," she whines, her voice croaking, suddenly she is blinking back tears.
"The people love me, damnit!"
The man suddenly kisses her full on the lips. It is Senator DeMint. They embrace.

O_______________O


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on January 25, 2012, 10:32:42 AM
It is no coincidence that pretty much every non-white group votes Democratic.

Republicans are racist.

It is no coincidence that plugs are found only on walls.  

Clearly floors and ceilings are electrophobes.


Glad we got that sorted out.

Floor:

()

Ceiling:

()

This evidence proves that the Republican Party must therefore be racist.

Well over 90% of plugs are found on walls.  Those are just "Uncle Tom" plugs.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on January 25, 2012, 07:53:04 PM
In all serious, I wouldn't lie ()

She is my current GF but we didn't make it FB public. That guy she has is actually an old friend who if memory serves me correctly may not be straight. It's one of those like when girls saying "Sally is married to Kristy" but under info it's interested in "men".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on January 25, 2012, 08:22:28 PM
()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 26, 2012, 02:20:03 AM
Context

What kind of masochistic idiot would join the Republican Party just to participate in their primaries?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 26, 2012, 04:41:39 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on January 27, 2012, 11:35:05 AM
So how does the mighty Naso respond to accusations that he is being hypocritical in his... "recent activities"?

Having a relationship and being against the amount of vulgar smut thrust into the faces of America's youth through music, movies and television are two entirely separate things.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 28, 2012, 02:24:09 PM
Twilight Sparkle- he could tame any wild animals with his magic ponies


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on January 29, 2012, 04:32:34 AM
I'm a little less drunk now but getting the NYT alert that Cain was endorsing while I was falling down drunk and waiting in line at ben's chili bowl was the highlight of my night.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on January 29, 2012, 11:59:01 PM
The last bit in that post was far better and got sigged.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on January 30, 2012, 04:16:47 AM
Since that thread got locked I just want to put the following out there as a reply to the last 2 posts of it:

Inks: FCK YOU
Mikado: Yes. Very much so.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on January 30, 2012, 05:36:00 AM
Yeah, I read it and wanted to quote Mick and add "worth it, I believe". Then I noticed it was locked. :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 30, 2012, 08:18:15 AM
()

The guy on the right is opebo.  The guy on the left is BRTD.  The guy in the middle is the rest of the forum.  The endless repetition is the endless repetition.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on January 30, 2012, 11:41:59 AM
this deserves it's own special display case within the Institute

Sometime late in 2011, there was this aeroplane... ..over the Altantic on its way to London...and there were four passengers aboard from the Atlas Forum:  BRTD, a Gay, a Moderator, and a new Sock. So halfway over the ocean the engines run low on petrol. So they have to lighten the plane. So they heave out all the baggage, but it's still too heavy. So they chuck out all the seats, but it's still too heavy. Finally, BRTD, he steps up, shouts "Emo will Rise again in greatness", and leaps out. Then the Gay, he steps up, shouts "God made me this way", and he leaps out. But the plane is still too heavy. So the new Sock, from Texas, he steps up, shouts: "Remember jmfcst", and chucks out the Moderator!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on January 30, 2012, 12:51:55 PM
Click for context.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on January 30, 2012, 01:11:10 PM
Dear students, faculty and staff,

I am writing you to serve notice that Mr. jmfcst is hereby expelled from The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy for inappropriate self promotion. This, as you know, is a serious offense and will not be taken lightly. We would kindly suggest, in an effort to help redeem himself and possibly gain re-admittance, that Mr. jmfcst instead engage in self promotion in the Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance and Bad Posts.


Sincerely,

Keystone Phil


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on January 30, 2012, 02:16:37 PM
Herman Cain is most likely still leading. There is no reason to disregard the latest poll from that state.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Alcon on January 30, 2012, 04:21:31 PM
Dear students, faculty and staff,

I am writing you to serve notice that Mr. jmfcst is hereby expelled from The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy for inappropriate self promotion. This, as you know, is a serious offense and will not be taken lightly. We would kindly suggest, in an effort to help redeem himself and possibly gain re-admittance, that Mr. jmfcst instead engage in self promotion in the Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance and Bad Posts.


Sincerely,

Keystone Phil

<3


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on January 30, 2012, 05:21:23 PM
Dear students, faculty and staff,

I am writing you to serve notice that Mr. jmfcst is hereby expelled from The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy for inappropriate self promotion. This, as you know, is a serious offense and will not be taken lightly. We would kindly suggest, in an effort to help redeem himself and possibly gain re-admittance, that Mr. jmfcst instead engage in self promotion in the Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance and Bad Posts.


Sincerely,

Keystone Phil

I am promoting myself?!  If you haven't noticed, I refer to the jmfcst in third person...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on January 30, 2012, 07:03:46 PM
Sorry for not fully monitoring this. So Naso's girlfriend looks like a female version of himself? Not surprising.

Keystone Phil's female version of himself:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on January 30, 2012, 08:15:35 PM
Click for context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on January 30, 2012, 09:22:46 PM
Dear students, faculty and staff,

I am writing you to serve notice that Mr. jmfcst is hereby expelled from The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy for inappropriate self promotion. This, as you know, is a serious offense and will not be taken lightly. We would kindly suggest, in an effort to help redeem himself and possibly gain re-admittance, that Mr. jmfcst instead engage in self promotion in the Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance and Bad Posts.


Sincerely,

Keystone Phil

I am promoting myself?!  If you haven't noticed, I refer to the jmfcst in third person...

See, this post is funnier than the one you actually quoted into the Institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on January 31, 2012, 04:14:54 PM
Context

Axelrod's anti-Mormon bigotry is disgusting.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on January 31, 2012, 05:19:12 PM
IN-5: Dan Burton bows out.

http://nationaljournal.com/congress/facing-tough-primary-veteran-rep-burton-bows-out-20120131

R+1!!!

R+15. This is one of the most conservative districts in the midwest.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 01, 2012, 06:18:16 AM
nothing new/distinct out of Professor, but I still lol'd.

Virginia's flirtation with the Democratic party looks like a one night stand.

You don't know the first thing about a "one night stand".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on February 01, 2012, 06:50:07 AM
If you haven't noticed, I refer to the jmfcst in third person...

So does Elmo.  Do you want a medal?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on February 01, 2012, 04:17:41 PM
If you haven't noticed, I refer to the jmfcst in third person...

So does Elmo.  Do you want a medal?

thank you, Ebowed the Grouch


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 01, 2012, 05:56:36 PM
If you haven't noticed, I refer to the jmfcst in third person...

So does Elmo.  Do you want a medal?

thank you, Ebowed the Grouch


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on February 01, 2012, 11:20:00 PM
Just write up a repeal of marriage licensing in your state and let churches take it over.  You can get married at the First Fabulous Church of His Lord in your area.

???


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 02, 2012, 03:15:33 PM
BTW I found out that the woman who opened my heart to Christ is also a huge Ron Paul supporter so if I see her again another change might happen with me...

Paultarded BRTD would be an Atlas doomsday scenario.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on February 02, 2012, 07:42:02 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on February 02, 2012, 07:47:09 PM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on February 02, 2012, 11:44:25 PM
He will be the competent president who made it morning in America again.

Are you getting paid to do this?

I believe in America.
I believe in Mitt Romney.

Thanks for answering the question.

You're welcome.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Fuzzybigfoot on February 03, 2012, 12:53:54 PM
I can't imagine the type of lifestyle one leads when they have a social score in the -8's.

After a long day of euthanizing my friends and masturbating in public, I fall asleep to the peaceful sounds of pregnant women being pushed down staircases.  You could ask me how I live with myself, but I would simply respond by setting fire to your home and applying for an arts grant.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 03, 2012, 03:43:23 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 04, 2012, 10:11:02 AM
Context

would the media be all over him and would he have a huge following with fans or would Tim Tebowitz be just another QB?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 04, 2012, 12:58:02 PM
Last night I was hanging out in a gay pastor's apartment. Guy makes a great tequila sunrise by the way. I'm personally pretty close to these guys and thus could probably acheive "ordination" as an associate pastor easier than you could. Who knows maybe I'll even be invited to give a sermon as a guest speaker in a year. I've already served as a greeter at their first church gathering, and if I could play anything would probably be in their worship band.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on February 04, 2012, 09:42:08 PM
The mormons shaped Lincoln county like a mirror of Utah! How disgusting!

If I had one chance to go back in time, and I could either go back and kill Hitler before he came to power or go back in time and shoot the NV GOP in the face, I would pick the latter.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 04, 2012, 10:01:56 PM
Romney 35% (+2)
Gingrich 24% (-1)
Santorum 16%
Paul 12% (+1)

Probably a measure of momentum.

NONE OF THE THINGS YOU SAY ACTUALLY MEAN THINGS.

epic


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 04, 2012, 10:41:42 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 04, 2012, 10:51:41 PM
So Romney speech...

"America is awesome" YAY
"Lies about Obama and the economic trajectory" booo
"I'm awesome... disregard my time as Governor..." yay
"Obama is socialist" booo...ooo!
"Reaganesque baseless platitudes"yaaaay!
"Thanks Nevada you're the best!" yaaay"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on February 05, 2012, 01:45:31 AM
"Hello, Nevada Republican Party. How may I help you?"

"Hi, when are your results from Clark County going to be online?"

"We're still certifying the results."

"You're just making these up, aren't you?"

"No sir, we're certifying the results."

"What are the results from the Magical Jew Caucus?"

*click*


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on February 05, 2012, 02:44:19 AM
Meeker wins the night.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on February 05, 2012, 02:49:09 AM
The February 7th results should be really interesting, especially Nevada's.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on February 05, 2012, 03:06:39 AM
Lander's five missing precincts just came in.

They probably just made some sh**t up.

They actually replaced the lost results with votes for People Magazine's "Top 100 Sitcoms of the Last 50 Years," which explains Rick Santorum's surprise loss there to The King of Queens.

Alcon's really been outstanding this evening.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on February 05, 2012, 03:07:00 AM
The February 7th results should be really interesting, especially Nevada's.

Couldn't stop laughing at that one.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 05, 2012, 03:28:18 AM
The February 7th results should be really interesting, especially Nevada's.

Couldn't stop laughing at that one.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 05, 2012, 05:27:29 PM
Context

I demand that this thread is renamed 'The Glue Factory'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tpfkaw on February 05, 2012, 05:28:42 PM

The AH.com thread has been named that for a month.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on February 05, 2012, 11:21:56 PM
I would like to join the Pony club... here is my pony named Christie
()

Clarence, all is forgiven, you're officially my new favorite newbie.

(Nathan, you're no longer favorite newbie because you're no longer new)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on February 06, 2012, 02:48:59 AM
Couldn't decide if this belongs here or in the Deluge. Probably both.

In which Naso, amongst other things, compares the black experience in America to being ginger:

Or they just remain silent because they don't feel like getting into an argument with a racist a-hole who blames all of his problems on OBAMA.  I'm not suggesting that all people who are against Obama are racists, but you can always pick out the not so subtle racists by that certain inflection in their pronunciation of Obama.  I'm in NY and still bump into these people rather frequently. I'd imagine it is much worse in other areas.

Sadly, I agree.

I voted for Ken Blackwell for Governor of Ohio in 2006. He never stood a chance, but his race was a factor. I met some Republicans (older, 40s+) who were no fan of Strickland, but felt that they couldn't bring themselves to vote for a black man.

Indeed, this was the case in 2008. I spoke with one guy in his 40s a few days ago actually who said, "Hey man, I'm a Democrat...but no way I was gonna vote for Obama. You know why. (wink, wink)"

I saw a TON of that. I know it's said to be racist but you wouldn't believe how many people are seriously agitated by things they dislike and associate with African Americans. I think many problems are because lots of crime exists in inner cities, low income housing, all of which are predominately African American.

If every player for the Dallas Cowboys had bright orange hair, they would become the "ginger team" and fans of rival teams would say things that were negative about redheads because the team they oppose was full of redheads.

It's the same on both sides. They can say Ginger, but if you even joke anything remotely racist, it's a riot. It's Rodney King. It's Jesse Jackson.

That turns people, a large white majority, off. That's my fear. Obama may be re-elected President while massively, more than any other Democrat, losing the white vote. That's gotta make him feel subpar.

See, now I turn a corner. I don't vote based on the race of the candidate, I vote on issues. The problem is, many of those issues are things that I'm against that would tend to favor African Americans (welfare, section 8 housing, affirmative action, ect). But people will still label me a racist.

What can you do? I mean, eight years of a black President won't change anything. Some things will never change.

That's just the way it is.




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 06, 2012, 10:09:35 AM
I love that 'make him feel subpar' line.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on February 06, 2012, 03:29:06 PM
I generally find diagnosis via Blogspot to be an unreliable method.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on February 06, 2012, 04:30:56 PM
Couldn't decide if this belongs here or in the Deluge. Probably both.

In which Naso, amongst other things, compares the black experience in America to being ginger:

Or they just remain silent because they don't feel like getting into an argument with a racist a-hole who blames all of his problems on OBAMA.  I'm not suggesting that all people who are against Obama are racists, but you can always pick out the not so subtle racists by that certain inflection in their pronunciation of Obama.  I'm in NY and still bump into these people rather frequently. I'd imagine it is much worse in other areas.

Sadly, I agree.

I voted for Ken Blackwell for Governor of Ohio in 2006. He never stood a chance, but his race was a factor. I met some Republicans (older, 40s+) who were no fan of Strickland, but felt that they couldn't bring themselves to vote for a black man.

Indeed, this was the case in 2008. I spoke with one guy in his 40s a few days ago actually who said, "Hey man, I'm a Democrat...but no way I was gonna vote for Obama. You know why. (wink, wink)"

I saw a TON of that. I know it's said to be racist but you wouldn't believe how many people are seriously agitated by things they dislike and associate with African Americans. I think many problems are because lots of crime exists in inner cities, low income housing, all of which are predominately African American.

If every player for the Dallas Cowboys had bright orange hair, they would become the "ginger team" and fans of rival teams would say things that were negative about redheads because the team they oppose was full of redheads.

It's the same on both sides. They can say Ginger, but if you even joke anything remotely racist, it's a riot. It's Rodney King. It's Jesse Jackson.

That turns people, a large white majority, off. That's my fear. Obama may be re-elected President while massively, more than any other Democrat, losing the white vote. That's gotta make him feel subpar.

See, now I turn a corner. I don't vote based on the race of the candidate, I vote on issues. The problem is, many of those issues are things that I'm against that would tend to favor African Americans (welfare, section 8 housing, affirmative action, ect). But people will still label me a racist.

What can you do? I mean, eight years of a black President won't change anything. Some things will never change.

That's just the way it is.



As a ginger I have to say:

That's f**8in retarded bro.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 06, 2012, 06:12:10 PM
About Pony thread:

Can this thread be merged with that bestiality thread?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 06, 2012, 08:39:55 PM
If the Romney is to be the first poststructuralist president, Is this the first poststructuralist thread to commemorate this fact? The signs and the signifiers don't seem to be getting along much here.

The possible Romney Presidency does not exist outside the text. Thus, this thread is the only place where it is real.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 07, 2012, 06:09:54 PM
What this is, is the outfit of a man who believes both:

(a) it is important to maintain well-defined gender roles and to respect traditional sources of authority, and

(b) actually caring about whether your clothes look good or fit properly is gay.


This combination of beliefs, and thus the approach to dress, are not uniquely Mormon. See for example the following observation of Joe Republic:

I commented on this somewhere already this evening, but earlier today I noticed an unusually large number of guys wearing blazers, ties and khaki pants wandering amongst the ordinary tourists on the Strip.  Lo and behold, the Western Republican Conference is in town.

There are always conventions of all types going on here of course, and thus men wearing suits isn't an unusual sight in such a specifically casual environment.  However, this particular "fashion" combo seems to be exclusive to Republicans.  I don't get it.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on February 07, 2012, 09:03:01 PM
I think it's safe to say we all agree this show is far better than the utter filth that is South Park.

LOL I'm watching an episode now and I just noticed how a baby pony is in a baby carriage and wearing a diaper. LOL.

You are 28 years old.  That is all.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on February 07, 2012, 10:51:10 PM
Oh Jesus Christ on the cross... are you for serious?

Just one question snowy...

Where were YOU during the caucus tonight? >:(

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 07, 2012, 11:03:41 PM
This is also how I explain Politico. Some forlorn victim with nowhere else to go in the aftermath of a baleful, Bain-induced restructuring, no doubt.

Hey, I just want to ride in the pimped out dawg crate on top of the Mittmobile. Can't blame a guy for that. Who let the dawgs out? Romney, that's who, who.

Well, there you have it, folks.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Beet on February 08, 2012, 01:34:13 AM
It's strange how Romney and Gingrich are trailing Paul and Santorum, especially in comparison to the expected trend in Colorado. Unlike the closed caucus of Colorado, Missouri and Minnesota are open to all registered voters, which does not make a lot of sense really. I am going to blame the open caucus, and T-Paw for being an epic fail.

I expect Romney to win Colorado because it is closed only to Republicans.

I am calling shenanigans by Democrats here, especially after seeing the glee from Obama fanatics who want to turn all of America into Detroit. Very good job, but once the secret plans start leaking it is going to help Romney, especially if we can get it on record that some immature Democrats intentionally voted for Santorum because they think the Santorum Internet meme is hilarious...

Colorado will be the tell-tale sign, of course. The dirt always comes out in the wash...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on February 08, 2012, 01:57:11 PM
()
Fourmites Reaganfan and Keystone Phil
New York City, New York
July 2009


Once upon a time...
...in NYC...
...some believe around the year...
...two double aught-nine,
head priest of the Brown Santorum Clan,
Keystone Phil, was sitting with his buddy, Mike Naso...
...contemplating whatever it is
that a man of Keystone Phil's
infinite powers would contemplate -
which is another way
of saying, "Who knows?"


Posts like this are why we need jmfcst, and I now understand perfectly why he's immune from moderation. The man really is invaluable.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 08, 2012, 03:53:27 PM
Jew Republic is a massive HP tool of the ZOG banker plutocrat conspiracy sent to infiltrate the Ron Paul ReLoveUtion much like the German army had Adolf Hitler infiltrate the German Worker's Party in 1919.




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on February 08, 2012, 06:16:21 PM
A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx.

"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!"

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.

"How old is this rock?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied, "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian".

"Wrong. It's been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now"

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.

The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 08, 2012, 06:19:49 PM
A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx.

"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!"

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.

"How old is this rock?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied, "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian".

"Wrong. It's been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now"

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.

The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.

The amount of lol's radiating from my body right now...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on February 08, 2012, 10:51:06 PM
Hearsay from Ron Paul supporters says he won big last Saturday in northern Maine.

Ron Paul supporters would also tell you he won 37 states in the 1988 General election.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CatoMinor on February 08, 2012, 11:37:26 PM


Santorum's C.U.M. was pretty powerful, though, even though it came right after a limp finish.

If he has another C.U.M. right now, I think we'll all be startled by the result.  Mitt Romney won't know what hit him.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on February 09, 2012, 03:52:17 AM
Joe's post was even more lol-worthy than King's.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on February 09, 2012, 03:56:29 AM
Naw, that's not fair.  King put way more effort in.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on February 09, 2012, 04:12:04 AM
Naw, that's not fair.  King put way more effort in.

Of course. But your one-liner was the perfect complement.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on February 09, 2012, 03:42:12 PM
Unfortunately I don't think that's King's work. I'm pretty sure I've seen it before. It's a classic, though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 09, 2012, 06:16:13 PM
Yeah.  I read it somewhere on the net many months ago and it felt appropriate for the boring discussion that was unfolding in that thread.  Joe gets the 2 points.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 10, 2012, 06:39:06 PM
What the heck is this thing about Casey's hair, or rather the lack thereof?

I think we need someone to do a BRTD type signature:

The individuals pictured below are BALD:

(Mr. Clean) (Michael Jordan) (Bob Casey, Jr.)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on February 10, 2012, 11:52:31 PM
Yeah.  I read it somewhere on the net many months ago and it felt appropriate for the boring discussion that was unfolding in that thread.  Joe gets the 2 points.

2 points?  Why should Joe get infracted?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 10, 2012, 11:54:04 PM
Santorum is clearly setting us up to be defeated by the Witch-King of Angmar.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 11, 2012, 11:14:14 AM
Really?  I was under the impression that (Marxism) was whatever you want it to be.

Karl Marx can do anything you want, baby. Fifty dollars hourly or three hundred all night long.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on February 11, 2012, 01:13:17 PM
Rick Santorum pulls down his pants, showering the others (and his own ass) with santorum. Mitt Romney, furious, reaches into Santorum's asshole and pulls out his intestines, inside out. As bile, partially digested food, and intestinal bacteria spray across the bar, Romney uses the intestines to swing Santorum around like a lasso and bludgeoning Newt. Eventually, the blunt trauma leads Santorum to die of internal bleeding. Newt now fights back. From the bar counter, he leaps down, pinning Mitt down with his weight. As a natural reflex, Romney empties his bowels, soiling his magic underwear. Newt, turning on "Eye of the Tiger" on the radio, rips Santorum's corpse open and proceeds to stab Mitt to death with Santorum's ribs. The talent agent sits in shock for several minutes, then asks the blood and santorum-covered Gingrich what that act was called. Newt smiles, and shouts,

"The Aristocrats!"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: RI on February 11, 2012, 01:58:36 PM
Sorry if its too pro-heterosexual in here, guys.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 11, 2012, 02:21:05 PM
Rick Santorum pulls down his pants, showering the others (and his own ass) with santorum. Mitt Romney, furious, reaches into Santorum's asshole and pulls out his intestines, inside out. As bile, partially digested food, and intestinal bacteria spray across the bar, Romney uses the intestines to swing Santorum around like a lasso and bludgeoning Newt. Eventually, the blunt trauma leads Santorum to die of internal bleeding. Newt now fights back. From the bar counter, he leaps down, pinning Mitt down with his weight. As a natural reflex, Romney empties his bowels, soiling his magic underwear. Newt, turning on "Eye of the Tiger" on the radio, rips Santorum's corpse open and proceeds to stab Mitt to death with Santorum's ribs. The talent agent sits in shock for several minutes, then asks the blood and santorum-covered Gingrich what that act was called. Newt smiles, and shouts,

"The Aristocrats!"

Quoting yourself in the Institute: epic fail.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on February 11, 2012, 04:48:28 PM
Rick Santorum pulls down his pants, showering the others (and his own ass) with santorum. Mitt Romney, furious, reaches into Santorum's asshole and pulls out his intestines, inside out. As bile, partially digested food, and intestinal bacteria spray across the bar, Romney uses the intestines to swing Santorum around like a lasso and bludgeoning Newt. Eventually, the blunt trauma leads Santorum to die of internal bleeding. Newt now fights back. From the bar counter, he leaps down, pinning Mitt down with his weight. As a natural reflex, Romney empties his bowels, soiling his magic underwear. Newt, turning on "Eye of the Tiger" on the radio, rips Santorum's corpse open and proceeds to stab Mitt to death with Santorum's ribs. The talent agent sits in shock for several minutes, then asks the blood and santorum-covered Gingrich what that act was called. Newt smiles, and shouts,

"The Aristocrats!"

Quoting yourself in the Institute: epic fail.

I know.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on February 11, 2012, 04:51:50 PM
Snowstalker should be banned for this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 11, 2012, 10:50:14 PM
clarence is my new favorite poster.  The Professor's style in a real person.

Btw, it's much easier to offer assistance like this than it is for v0001 or whatever his name is.
That's the Chinaman who wants you fellas to do his homework for him right? Does he ask for sex tips too...?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on February 12, 2012, 06:18:05 AM
Meta-Goldmine quoting !

What's hiliarious is that you can say "c**nt" but "sh**t" is censored.  You can even change your username to c**nt.
By all means do.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 12, 2012, 09:04:22 AM
RIVAL CANDIDATE SUFFERS FAMILY TRAGEDY

MITTBOT WILL RUN COMPASSION.EXE

SYSTEM ERROR

MITTBOT DOES NOT RECOGNIZE COMPASSION.EXE

REBOOT



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 12, 2012, 09:54:59 AM
RIP

Bobby Brown has also been found dead in his hotel room. The suicide note said, "Two can play at that game."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Pingvin on February 13, 2012, 01:49:11 AM
I want to create a "Russian Election Jokes" section of Insitute and I will post jokes directly to the thread. Can I?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on February 13, 2012, 02:15:07 AM
"Russian elections are a joke.  The end."  That's about it, surely?


Anyway:

RIP


Bobby Brown has also been found dead in his hotel room. The suicide note said, "Two can play at that game."

Where did you get this ? There's nothing on Google News ...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Pingvin on February 13, 2012, 04:38:09 AM
"Russian elections are a joke.  The end."  That's about it, surely?


No, there are much, much more about this Uncle Vlad's Bear Circus.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Pingvin on February 13, 2012, 04:56:29 AM
In the Kremlin, a few people are playing cards. Cards got opened.
Man with Beard: I have six aces and three jokers!
All in chorus: -  Churov (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vladimir_Churov), go F**K yourself!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on February 13, 2012, 08:30:31 AM
Possibly the most JJ-ish post ever:

The colors are wrong for the SS.  Traditionally the color for the SS background is black; this one is blue.

So it is either coincidence or they are saying, "I'm a Nazi that went to Penn State."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 13, 2012, 08:35:34 PM
Context

No, but people compare me to House.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on February 13, 2012, 09:51:49 PM
RIP


Bobby Brown has also been found dead in his hotel room. The suicide note said, "Two can play at that game."

Where did you get this ? There's nothing on Google News ...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on February 13, 2012, 11:27:51 PM
Click for context.

Yeah, it really takes away from the realism of the movie.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on February 13, 2012, 11:34:45 PM

Haha, I just came in to post  that. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on February 14, 2012, 04:07:44 PM

You do know we all remember this (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=136402.msg2917413#msg2917413), right?

Oh my God don't bring that up nononononono NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO >:(

I lost my virginity last month.

Well, you beat me. I actually had in my mind a silent competition.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 14, 2012, 07:39:09 PM
()

There's still time for a late entry into the Republican primary field...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: homelycooking on February 14, 2012, 09:18:29 PM
Hey, it's my Comedy Institute debut!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 14, 2012, 09:26:03 PM

Also quite possibly one of the best posts I've ever seen.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on February 15, 2012, 12:22:11 AM
me asking Torie if he attended any emo shows in the 80s

in a thread discussing the 2010 Delaware Republican primary for US Senate.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 15, 2012, 12:29:53 AM
I just love the idea of King absentmindedly fingering with one hand and desperately typing a message on Atlas with the other.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on February 16, 2012, 12:18:52 AM
Gentlemen, please welcome a most unexpected visitor to these hallowed halls:

Santorum= Man on Dog
Romney= Dog on Car.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on February 16, 2012, 06:37:06 AM
He's human?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on February 16, 2012, 11:57:47 AM
See Phil is obviously being ironic and...

Take it easy for the day, my friend. We are almost in March so preparation for the 4th of July is just around the corner.

Around the corner?  AROUND THE CORNER?????   If it weren't for Kenya and focusing a lot of attention on that, I would be starting the preparation for the 4th of July NOW!!!!! or at least Memorial Day and Father's Day!  


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on February 16, 2012, 11:58:10 AM
Oh Christ, what is your goal, to turn the boy into a Gay?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on February 16, 2012, 01:27:12 PM
I don't understand funny.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on February 16, 2012, 02:45:58 PM
Dear students, faculty and staff,

I am writing you to serve notice that Mr. jmfcst is hereby expelled from The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy for inappropriate self promotion. This, as you know, is a serious offense and will not be taken lightly. We would kindly suggest, in an effort to help redeem himself and possibly gain re-admittance, that Mr. jmfcst instead engage in self promotion in the Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance and Bad Posts.


Sincerely,

Keystone Phil

* wild cheering *


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on February 16, 2012, 04:07:44 PM
Dang...I’m not sure what is more pathetic:  Alcon’s overreach in rewriting my post, or Badger‘s desperate use of Keystone Phil’s material as a substitute for his own lack of originality.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: J. J. on February 16, 2012, 06:07:04 PM
Possibly the most JJ-ish post ever:

The colors are wrong for the SS.  Traditionally the color for the SS background is black; this one is blue.

So it is either coincidence or they are saying, "I'm a Nazi that went to Penn State."

Made it!  :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 16, 2012, 06:13:32 PM
Mike Naso doesn't understand women, part 3840393485:

Well, of course. Obama is a 100% perfect voting block for single women. They are much more willing to give second chances. Many women believe men will change. "I know he was bad, but he's trying...ect". "He promises to change this time, ect".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on February 16, 2012, 06:15:38 PM
Mike Naso doesn't understand women, part 3840393485:

Well, of course. Obama is a 100% perfect voting block for single women. They are much more willing to give second chances. Many women believe men will change. "I know he was bad, but he's trying...ect". "He promises to change this time, ect".

that should cost him his man-bear award.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 16, 2012, 06:18:58 PM
This thread (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149056.0) leads me to believe he's broken up with that girl, so he should have his man-bear award taken away regardless.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on February 16, 2012, 10:59:35 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149051.0

The entire thread


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on February 17, 2012, 12:53:54 AM
Gentlemen, please welcome a most unexpected visitor to these hallowed halls:

Santorum= Man on Dog
Romney= Dog on Car.

That was actually kind of amusing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 17, 2012, 06:57:46 AM
Gentlemen, please welcome a most unexpected visitor to these hallowed halls:

Santorum= Man on Dog
Romney= Dog on Car.

That was actually kind of amusing.

only because of the context; he posted it no differently than he would have his latest 'Harkin SafeD(47); ' autism spectrum therapy sesh but showed a flickering consciousness of the broader context.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on February 17, 2012, 04:05:30 PM
I wonder how long it took Naso to write this with only one hand.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 17, 2012, 05:12:50 PM
A German President involved in some corruption stuffs??

The rapprochement between France and Germany becomes bigger and bigger.

You'd still have to work on it though. No way a French politician resigns.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on February 17, 2012, 05:16:06 PM
What the hell do you do with your girlfriend outside of eating dinner and listening to her complain if it isn't f**king the living s**t out of her?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 17, 2012, 09:24:04 PM
The Grey. Again.

Truly awesome.

Coincidentally, it could be an allegory for the 2012 Republican primaries/caucuses with Liam Neeson playing Mitt Romney, and the wolves representing Democratic Party special interests with Alpha Wolf Barack Obama and Omega Wolf John King (Think back to Newt's response to John's debate opener a few weeks ago). One of the human characters is even a black guy whose fate resembles the whimpering exit of Herman Cain. And look at how closely the "final four" in the movie parallel Mitt, Rick, Newt and Ron Paul LOL

()
READY FOR THE ALPHA WOLF


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on February 18, 2012, 10:03:41 AM
He's obviously trolling at this point.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 18, 2012, 10:08:51 AM
or at least, conscious that he is regarded as a troll and playing into it.

this largely describes Naso as well (though 'troll' is a harsh term in his case)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 18, 2012, 02:53:45 PM
With numbers like these, you'd think Massachusetts was Mitt's home state instead of Michigan.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 18, 2012, 03:06:19 PM
Really, there's no point in posting Politico anymore, but this one tickled me especially:

That show Big Bang Theory is enormously popular among females. Chicks dig geeks. Chicks will dig Romney's geekiness.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on February 18, 2012, 07:50:08 PM
Really, there's no point in posting Politico anymore, but this one tickled me especially:

That show Big Bang Theory is enormously popular among females. Chicks dig geeks. Chicks will dig Romney's geekiness.

Damn, beat me to it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on February 18, 2012, 11:02:43 PM
You realise you're not actually a fictional politician, just some guy on an obscure internet forum, right? Who is the intended audience of this vapid drivel?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 19, 2012, 09:55:50 AM
funny cause it's true

...lunch is fantastic when it (1) involves alcohol, (2) lasts for at least 90 minutes and (3) involves friends.

What you have just described is illegal under neo-liberalism.  Get back to work!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on February 19, 2012, 10:12:49 AM
I love the United States of America. I love her so much that it hurts and makes me angry, frustrated and saddened when I see her in bad shape.

All around the world in Human history we've seen attempts at Government and society that could better the lives of people. Sadly, most of these attempts failed. But, for almost 237 years now, the United States of America has remained the sole torch that carries the light of freedom around the world. Many other countries now live under monarchies, dictatorships, and even anarchy. But America remains freedom's last best hope. Where would people look to without the United States? Greece? France? China? It's a scary thought, which is exactly why we need to keep the fundamental principals of the United States alive and well for freedom's preservation.

Today, however, I see a bleak picture for the short term United States. I see a nation where people fear using the word God, which our country was founded on, which appears on our currency, because they are afraid that they may offend a select few people.

Government and higher-ups...must stay out of the lives of the American people. Don't tell us what doctor to go to, don't take the money we earn, don't tell us what we can feed our children in school lunches. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. President Ronald Reagan said, "I don't believe in a government that protects us from ourselves." Agreed, Mr. President.

The business of Government is NOT to control the American people. It's the job of the American people and the entrepreneurial spirit to help America run.

As Ronald Reagan also once said, "The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'" It couldn't be more true.

When I hear Republican candidates speak about "the two visions for America", I know exactly what they mean. I see a country where people are terrified to do or say what's fundamentally right for fear of insulting a very small fraction of people. I see a country where people do everything they can to recieve goods and services for free, not to save money, but just because they feel entitled to it. They are entitled to nothing. The unalienable rights they have to act that way are what they are entitled to. Just as Westboro protesters can stand near a Military funeral and protest in a disgraceful way, regardless of how despicable it is, that is their right. It is the same that Americans have the right to bear arms. It's fact. It's our constitution. It's what America was founded on.

That's the difference between the ideologies. In the majority of America, if you asks somebody what they are, they don't say "a firemen" or a "teacher"...they say, "A Christian". Outside of New England, the West Coast and Chicagoland, it's quite different. I've heard people say, you want to feel the pulse of America, come to Trenton, or New York. I disagree, the pulse of America is in the heartland.

So comes my fear for the next four years. Barack Obama is re-elected. My fear is that the election will show America's divisions. As is the case in virtually ever national election, women and African Americans will vote overwhelmingly for the Democrats, while white voters and men will vote overwhelmingly for the Republicans. However, this fall, I feel it will be exaggerated. I feel that men and whites will vote astoundingly for the Republican candidate, most likely Santorum, while African Americans and women will vote astoundingly for Obama. Thus no matter what occurs (and don't rule out a Santorum victory with an Obama popular vote win) America will appear more divided than ever before along racial and gender lines.

Barack Obama will take office again on January 20, 2013 and the second term curse begins. From Watergate to Iran Contra to Impeachment to Katrina/Economic Collapse. 1974, 1987, 1999, 2006....second term years that left a large negative on each of those four Presidents. It's of course too early to yet determine if Barack Obama will escape the same fate.

Then you have the midterms of 2014, which if Obama is re-elected, appear favorable for Republicans. Then a wide bench of non-flawed Republican candidates vs. a slim bench of older, unappealing Democratic candidates. Thus in November 2016, we elect a Republican President, continuing the politics of the last 16 years of one party succeeding the other.

But in my heart I know America will come back, it's just a question of if and when. I still see a country I love.

- Reaganfan


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 19, 2012, 05:56:33 PM
I love the United States of America. Yes, I love her - from her rich abundance of fast food outlets to the alluring, almost sexual jags and curves of her coasts - and it hurts. I get angry, frustrated and saddened when I see her in bad shape, looking like a meth whore, her big 80s hair falling in ugly clumps from the national scalp.

For almost 237 years now, the United States of America has stood proud, the world's loudest and shrillest voice for the vague "Reaganesque" concepts I hold dear. Freedom. Liberty. God. Yes, America remains the mythical shining city on the hill (Reagan, 2:15 - "You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden."), but I fear the city is crumbling, decaying - overrun by ethnic groups of every hue under the sun, by hordes of marauding homosexuals, by groups of wild-eyed socialists, by fearsome militias of Black Panthers, and, yes, by Democrats. I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by political correctness, starving, hysterical naked, dragging themselves through San Francisco streets at dawn looking for a "fix". A "fix" of drugs.

I knew a woman once, and her name was Freedom. She was aging but vital, the righteous (and Right-eous) fire in her eyes more than making up for the sagging in her bosom and the distinguished crow's feet around her eyes. She had a stunning mess of blow-dried, blonde hair, improbably permed. We spoke of God and country, of small government and low taxes. She was twice my age, with two grown sons fighting overseas, and a third who was a Republican Congressman. She was, in short, what I called a 'cougar'.

We made love like animals, on a blanket underneath the stars. Afterward, I smoked a cigarette and pointed out the constellations. "That one's Reagan," I said, pointing. She took the cigarette out of my mouth and took a drag. "That one's Bush. That one -" I pointed at a cluster of stars resembling a weeping eagle "is Liberty".

Freedom looked at me for a very long time. "Liberty," she whispered. "Liberty," I replied with the kind of grin Tom Cruise gave in Top Gun, and kissed her.

Me and Freedom parted ways the next evening. I understood. I was a virile, if ginger, young man, and she was a mature woman with a deep sadness inside. As I turned to leave, throwing on my denim jacket, she grabbed my arm. "Remember to always vote Republican!" she said. I smiled. "Always do," I replied, and jumped on my horse, Gipper, casually tossing my ten gallon hat on my head.

As I rode off into the sunset that July night, I realised it was July 4th. Independence Day. I slid off Gipper and sat on the side of the road, staring out at the rugged landscape that surrounded me. Somewhere to the west, homosexual and drug-users were "partying" in San Francisco. To the east, degenerates and crack-fiends would be doing the same in New York city. But not here. Here was calm, and quiet. As I smoked another Lucky Strike, I glanced up at the stars, and saw the constellation I'd pointed out to Freedom last night.

I stared up at Reagan, twinkling in the black night, and a single tear rolled down my cheek. I stayed there like that for some time.

---

Anyway, what I'm saying is that Democrats are politically correct pussies, and that all non-whites will vote for Obama, and that everyone should vote for Rick Santorum. Rah-rah-Republicans!

Thank you, and God bless you. And God bless the United States of America.

- Oakvale.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 20, 2012, 03:18:52 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 20, 2012, 09:54:48 AM

Dammit I was just gonna post that :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on February 20, 2012, 03:53:17 PM
Does Courtney Love count as a woman? Or hot? Cuz honestly, looking at her gives me diarrhea.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: J. J. on February 20, 2012, 09:33:34 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149326.msg3204320;boardseen#new

One of the more bizarre ones I've read.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on February 21, 2012, 03:48:16 PM
d
ELECTION 2092

()

Iowa Senator and Fmr. Biologist Jumbo Yumpiger (Republican) : 49.7%, 316 EVs
Utah Governor and Fmr. General Knark Glubyah (Democrat) : 49.9%, 222 EVs


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on February 21, 2012, 04:09:16 PM
Wow, I think this is my official debut in the institute. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on February 21, 2012, 04:25:24 PM
The best thing about that map is how a quarter of the United States population is on the moon and the overall size of the Electoral College still doesn't change.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 21, 2012, 06:01:16 PM
We have talked marriage. Seriously. Which would be lovely.

If you get married you really have to share with us which of you 'wears the tiara'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on February 21, 2012, 10:25:52 PM
d
ELECTION 2092

()

Iowa Senator and Fmr. Biologist Jumbo Yumpiger (Republican) : 49.7%, 316 EVs
Utah Governor and Fmr. General Knark Glubyah (Democrat) : 49.9%, 222 EVs

A blue moon?  I can't see that happening very often.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on February 21, 2012, 11:40:05 PM
The best thing about that map is how a quarter of the United States population is on the moon and the overall size of the Electoral College still doesn't change.

Or how Wyoming is the second largest state after the moon.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on February 22, 2012, 03:53:10 AM
d
ELECTION 2092

()

Iowa Senator and Fmr. Biologist Jumbo Yumpiger (Republican) : 49.7%, 316 EVs
Utah Governor and Fmr. General Knark Glubyah (Democrat) : 49.9%, 222 EVs

What happened to the upper East Coast, population-wise ?

Asteroid impact in the Atlantic in the 2060s, followed by a 1/2-mile high tsunami ?

Or did the New Yorkers all go to the moon, like they do with Florida now ?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on February 22, 2012, 11:37:39 AM
Global warming made it more like northern Quebec, climatewise, and the Canadian and northeast Americans largely moved to the rockies as climate refugees as they were warming but still had bountiful supplies of clean, fresh water?

Or sumthin'


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on February 22, 2012, 02:55:28 PM
Global warming made it more like northern Quebec, climatewise, and the Canadian and northeast Americans largely moved to the rockies as climate refugees as they were warming but still had bountiful supplies of clean, fresh water?

Or sumthin'

Also, the Very Very Great Depression of 2053 hurt the Northeast and Midwest particularly hard, so that the region fell into anarchy and mass starvation, thus encouraging emigration. Oh, and let's not forget about the 2043-44 Great Nuclear Catastrophe, as well as the Stobbertnist Revolts of 2059.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on February 22, 2012, 04:24:09 PM
It's immoral if you're a selfish brut and are not giving your old lady the high, hard one because you're always pounding it.  Lots of middle-aged guys are like this.  They know it's immoral.

On the other hand, if you've got a little energy left over after taking care of the family, or you are out of town and not expected to stand it up at attention like a soldier on command for anyone special, then it's generally not a problem.  Just lie back naked and squeeze one off in the hotel room and let the housekeeping staff deal with the fallout.  That's what I always do.



Thank you for making the funniest post I've ever read on this site ever.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 22, 2012, 06:08:57 PM
Context



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on February 22, 2012, 08:10:51 PM

I will not do it in a box,
I will not do it with a fox,
I will not cream into my socks
I just don't like to roll my rocks.

Try it, try it, you will see,
It's as easy as can be,
Spit can lube it, right on top,
Once you try it, you can't stop.

Hey, Sam I am, this is no jest,
Tossing, slapping, it's the best!
I like it since it's so much fun.
But what a mess when it's all done. 


From the same thread


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tpfkaw on February 23, 2012, 01:06:35 AM
Newt was "intellectually superior" to the others on stage.
Governor Rick Perry


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Middle-aged Europe on February 23, 2012, 01:47:36 PM
d
ELECTION 2092

()

Iowa Senator and Fmr. Biologist Jumbo Yumpiger (Republican) : 49.7%, 316 EVs
Utah Governor and Fmr. General Knark Glubyah (Democrat) : 49.9%, 222 EVs

What happened to the upper East Coast, population-wise ?

Asteroid impact in the Atlantic in the 2060s, followed by a 1/2-mile high tsunami ?

Or did the New Yorkers all go to the moon, like they do with Florida now ?

Wait a minute, Puerto Rico and Alberta are still no states of the U.S. by 2092?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 23, 2012, 01:52:07 PM
He was going to be performing "Gold Standard of my Heart" and "Sorry Hamid (I'm pulling out)!"  Those are his most famous hits!  I've always doubted some of his 90s stuff, though.  "Fleet of Foot" is such a Lew Rockwell ripoff.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on February 23, 2012, 03:24:07 PM
It's sunny out, I'm enjoying my day off, I have the sun glaring at me as I log on the forum and I see depressing things that bring me down.

Warning:  You are NOT a day-walker!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on February 23, 2012, 06:35:47 PM
He was going to be performing "Gold Standard of my Heart" and "Sorry Hamid (I'm pulling out)!"  Those are his most famous hits!  I've always doubted some of his 90s stuff, though.  "Fleet of Foot" is such a Lew Rockwell ripoff.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 23, 2012, 06:36:39 PM
Post already, darling.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 23, 2012, 06:36:52 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149523.0 (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149523.0)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on February 24, 2012, 09:09:34 AM
...

and as I try to finish the guy off, he gets closer and closer.

You don't say?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on February 24, 2012, 11:55:24 AM
2 - it takes a lot to offend me.  But I'm sure I get offended every once in a while.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on February 24, 2012, 11:58:14 AM

From Captain Profanity? Wow.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on February 24, 2012, 01:07:04 PM

People seem to think that Inks gets offended by profanity. That's not my impression. He's a stickler for rules, so he upholds the ToS which specifically prohibits profanity. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 24, 2012, 01:19:55 PM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on February 24, 2012, 01:46:26 PM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 24, 2012, 01:48:48 PM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.

Come on, Gramps. It's not like Inks is a Virgin Mary.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on February 24, 2012, 01:56:27 PM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.

Come on, Gramps. It's not like Inks is a Virgin Mary.

Ok fine, just a virgin then :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 24, 2012, 03:35:10 PM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.

Come on, Gramps. It's not like Inks is a Virgin Mary.

Ok fine, just a virgin then :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 24, 2012, 07:15:48 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on February 24, 2012, 07:20:50 PM
OK, seriously, stop taking potshots at Inks for doing his job.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 24, 2012, 07:23:53 PM
Eh, it was actually the general tone of the argument that I found funny (and shareable or something). Not intended as a potshot.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on February 24, 2012, 07:47:33 PM
How reliable has PrimR been this cycle?

It's been all over the place! Completely unpredictable.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on February 24, 2012, 08:07:18 PM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.

It's true... I don't!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 24, 2012, 08:15:21 PM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.

It's true... I don't!

Time to see a doctor, perhaps?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on February 25, 2012, 12:31:30 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on February 25, 2012, 06:08:45 AM
Yes you are. You are very curious indeed. A most curious person, even by the standards of this place.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on February 25, 2012, 06:36:38 AM
Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.

It's true... I don't!

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 25, 2012, 09:46:04 AM
MITTBOT VISITS POVERTY-STRICKEN CITY

RUN:/LIST#CARSWIFEOWNS.EXE



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on February 25, 2012, 11:29:17 AM
Well, it was Santorum's own fault that he lost re-election to a bald, obese, physically handicapped man in 2006; who then went on to vote for Sotomayor's confirmation.  Therefore Santorum voted for her too, effectively.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on February 25, 2012, 06:25:02 PM
Perhaps, others consider it crazy that we've allowed these fraudulent theories to infect our country and twist our fellow citizens' minds.

I've shook hands with people who are around 80 years of age. You do not shake their hand THAT way. You are liable to hurt them, if you ask me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 25, 2012, 07:31:51 PM
Anyone else do this? My films & English teacher has practically no knowledge of history whatsoever. This gives me a large amount of freedom on assignments she gives us. In the beginning of the year in Films, one of our assignments was to explain why the silent film industry died. In it, I explained how Labor Secretary Arthur Hernwhich helped to destroy it (more to come on this) & about the Anarcho-Christian movement's silent film that advocated government overthrow made the industry look bad. More recently, I credited Senator Josiah Melvington of California for putting a Civil Rights plank on the 1948 Democatoc platform. I plan on using this character more in an assignment due Monday.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on February 25, 2012, 08:18:53 PM
Funny you should mention Roger Scruton, as he actually makes sense, compared to Clive James (unless of course that was the point of the option).

The Religion and Philosophy board always maintains the highest standards!

(I'm actually upset that at least one American knows who those people are).

Believe me, I'm upset that I know that too.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on February 26, 2012, 12:06:27 AM
Funny you should mention Roger Scruton, as he actually makes sense, compared to Clive James (unless of course that was the point of the option).

The Religion and Philosophy board always maintains the highest standards!

(I'm actually upset that at least one American knows who those people are).

Believe me, I'm upset that I know that too.

Nathan is the best poster.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on February 26, 2012, 01:18:05 AM
Funny you should mention Roger Scruton, as he actually makes sense, compared to Clive James (unless of course that was the point of the option).

The Religion and Philosophy board always maintains the highest standards!

(I'm actually upset that at least one American knows who those people are).

Believe me, I'm upset that I know that too.

Nathan is the best poster.

Thank you, Comrade!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on February 26, 2012, 01:18:20 AM
It's even harder than usual for me to think of someone as 'hot' when my friends always made me be her when we played Power Rangers in first grade.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 26, 2012, 01:11:37 PM
And here I thought this place was called US Election Atlas, not Soviet Command & Control Atlas.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on February 26, 2012, 10:39:20 PM
You should write down these suggestions, and perhaps pin them to the door of a church in Germany.  People wouldn't expect that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on February 27, 2012, 01:05:48 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on February 27, 2012, 05:28:38 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on February 27, 2012, 10:02:18 AM

It's bad graphic design, but I think that makes it worthy of The Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance, and Bad Posts, not this illustrious institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: homelycooking on February 27, 2012, 10:30:04 AM
It's bad graphic design, but I think that makes it worthy of The Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance, and Bad Posts, not this illustrious institute.

That's the last time I use MS Paint for a poster like that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on February 27, 2012, 10:41:36 AM

It's bad graphic design, but I think that makes it worthy of The Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance, and Bad Posts, not this illustrious institute.
I thought it was funny.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on February 27, 2012, 12:39:26 PM
Yeah I didn't get it, but I hardly think we should be critiquing posts by graphic design.  Content is what matters.  I say that because I don't know how to use the graphic design.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: homelycooking on February 27, 2012, 12:55:45 PM
The reference I made there was admittedly obscure (http://bangordailynews.com/2011/02/22/politics/gov-lepage-dismisses-dangers-of-bpa).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on February 27, 2012, 01:03:22 PM
Eh, it isn't much worse than any of the current candidates' campaign material on the Republican side, graphically speaking. Similar to what id expect from a hypothetical LePage campaign, it is.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on February 27, 2012, 03:14:07 PM
Is Santorum a Transylvanian or a Penisylvanian ?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on February 27, 2012, 03:53:25 PM
This in itself deserves to be highlighted...

Yeah I didn't get it, but I hardly think we should be critiquing posts by graphic design.  Content is what matters.  I say that because I don't know how to use the graphic design.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 27, 2012, 06:15:36 PM
I thought Homely's post was funny. The poor graphic design kinda speaks to the fact that Paul LePage is an HP.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on February 27, 2012, 09:24:21 PM
Grand total of 51 points, halfway to a permaban, and Moderator Review status for five days.

This is what we call, in the biz, a "good start."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on February 27, 2012, 09:50:38 PM

Little know fact: the ':(' is part of its official spelling.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on February 28, 2012, 12:07:15 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on February 28, 2012, 01:58:06 PM
I need to get my mind out of the gutter.

He has an impressively firm grasp of Herman Cain.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on February 28, 2012, 05:47:10 PM
Ron Paul hates the blacks, who are quite fleet of foot.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on February 28, 2012, 09:47:03 PM
11k, margin is narrowing.

What do I get if Santorum comes from behind? :)

A towel.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on February 29, 2012, 10:59:44 PM

I would go so far to say its a right-wing thing, but it could be a left-wing thing too. Definitely an illiberal thing.

I mean, you have to understand that even American Liberalism != Left-Wing. American liberalism is about standing up to the man and using Uncle Sam as the referee and traditional Liberalism is standing up to the man and having no referee because Uncle Sam is one of "the men" , Left-Wing ideology is  about standing up to the man by replacing the "man" with  Rosie O Donnell. ...and for a reference, conservatism is about not giving a phuck that you are being kept down by the man because you wouldn't be able to make it without him and Right-Wing ideology is about "the man" being "the man".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 01, 2012, 08:51:33 AM
So, finally, Xahar, I hope this shows you I'm damn well thinking.

And you failed to convince us again.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 01, 2012, 03:26:32 PM
Simfan, you should read Huckleberry Finn.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 01, 2012, 08:01:45 PM

I somehow doubt you mean that literally, as there is nothing negative about this honorable profession.  Perhaps you mean something else.. some other related malign of the gender.  In any case your crude statement tells us much more about you than about the ladies in question.  And it is not to your credit, I might add.

^^^ You are right.

I think the Merriam-Webster definition of "whore" is simply "girl who has sex with someone who is not me."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on March 01, 2012, 08:14:17 PM
many coincidences are not coincidences.  NY is the most gerrymanderd state in the country and any fair redistricting effort would lead to more Republican or Conservative  representation.  therefore it is not surprising that a website that was created by a very big liberal would shut down for the first time on the day that NY allowed any individual to submit a map.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 01, 2012, 08:52:57 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 01, 2012, 10:30:35 PM
I'm very much looking forward to the general election campaign:


()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 01, 2012, 10:53:17 PM
many coincidences are not coincidences.  NY is the most gerrymanderd state in the country and any fair redistricting effort would lead to more Republican or Conservative  representation.  therefore it is not surprising that a website that was created by a very big liberal would shut down for the first time on the day that NY allowed any individual to submit a map.

A far better candidate for the Deluge.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on March 01, 2012, 11:21:10 PM
many coincidences are not coincidences.  NY is the most gerrymanderd state in the country and any fair redistricting effort would lead to more Republican or Conservative  representation.  therefore it is not surprising that a website that was created by a very big liberal would shut down for the first time on the day that NY allowed any individual to submit a map.

A far better candidate for the Deluge.

I generally try to use the Deluge for posts that offend or upset me and the Institute for ones that amuse me no matter how unintentionally.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 01, 2012, 11:36:18 PM
many coincidences are not coincidences.  NY is the most gerrymanderd state in the country and any fair redistricting effort would lead to more Republican or Conservative  representation.  therefore it is not surprising that a website that was created by a very big liberal would shut down for the first time on the day that NY allowed any individual to submit a map.

A far better candidate for the Deluge.

I generally try to use the Deluge for posts that offend or upset me and the Institute for ones that amuse me no matter how unintentionally.

Well pretty much every post that guy makes would fit in at least one of them based on that criteria (and all would also fit well in a hypothetical "Horrible spelling and grammar goldmine" to boot.)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on March 01, 2012, 11:43:59 PM
many coincidences are not coincidences.  NY is the most gerrymanderd state in the country and any fair redistricting effort would lead to more Republican or Conservative  representation.  therefore it is not surprising that a website that was created by a very big liberal would shut down for the first time on the day that NY allowed any individual to submit a map.

A far better candidate for the Deluge.

I generally try to use the Deluge for posts that offend or upset me and the Institute for ones that amuse me no matter how unintentionally.

Well pretty much every post that guy makes would fit in at least one of them based on that criteria (and all would also fit well in a hypothetical "Horrible spelling and grammar goldmine" to boot.)

I thought the combination of conspiracy theorizing and taking somebody else's sarcasm completely at face value even after I pointed it out made this one special, though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: NY Jew on March 02, 2012, 06:11:49 AM
many coincidences are not coincidences.  NY is the most gerrymanderd state in the country and any fair redistricting effort would lead to more Republican or Conservative  representation.  therefore it is not surprising that a website that was created by a very big liberal would shut down for the first time on the day that NY allowed any individual to submit a map.

A far better candidate for the Deluge.

I generally try to use the Deluge for posts that offend or upset me and the Institute for ones that amuse me no matter how unintentionally.

Well pretty much every post that guy makes would fit in at least one of them based on that criteria (and all would also fit well in a hypothetical "Horrible spelling and grammar goldmine" to boot.)

I thought the combination of conspiracy theorizing and taking somebody else's sarcasm completely at face value even after I pointed it out made this one special, though.
just because it he meant it sarcastically doesn't mean It can't be true. 

No I don't think that's what happened but I do think there's a chance it's true (less then 5% possibility)

when I was saying it I was venting because I was furious that I couldn't finish up the map I was going to submit and afraid I'll miss my opportunity.  (thus why i said it in such a format "ditto ditto ditto")  Afterwords I was just playing devils advocate (in a sarcastic manner (on your misunderstanding what I wrote) which didn't seem to get through on a ) on that thread because I was furious waiting for it to work again.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 02, 2012, 06:22:30 AM
Carpooling sounds like quite the liberal idea, Naso.   It reduces gas usage and defies individuality.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on March 02, 2012, 02:31:40 PM

He's in Oklahoma, bro. They don't get everything on time there.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 02, 2012, 05:54:55 PM
Ray likes fishing, Caroline sings in a choir and Mike is a fan of French cinema. Mary is a bit of a recluse.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 02, 2012, 07:41:42 PM
t_host1 is the guy farthest to left.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 03, 2012, 03:07:36 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 04, 2012, 09:48:15 AM
To be honest, I am actually looking forward to growing old.  Each day that I get older puts me closer to going home to see my Jesus!  Note: my home is heaven, not Oklahoma.
You're looking forward to dying? Dude, get some counseling!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 04, 2012, 10:00:05 PM
This forum is beginning to scare me.

Just when you thought it was safe to surf the internet.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 04, 2012, 10:36:03 PM
Picked up some Cubaveras at Macy's today
()

along with some Ralph Lauren Black cologne... you ain't seen it all till you've seen Clarence roll into a bar with wing men readyt o rock and roll... we may be old but that gives us one thing besides wrinkles- experience

Vegas baby- Party time


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on March 05, 2012, 12:38:39 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on March 05, 2012, 09:32:59 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on March 05, 2012, 09:46:54 PM
They are going to look at you weird, wait for a little bit to figure out how to process the extra money you just gave them through the register, and then just give up and add it to the tip fund.  Which means you're tipping them for making a mistake that had initially benefited you.  Besides, nobody working there is going to think for a second that you don't have the "utmost honesty and integrity" because (a) they won't remember and (b) they won't care, and why the f[inks] am I still trying to convince you that the things you do are always wrong and stupid because you've never listened before so why am I still typing oh my god


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on March 05, 2012, 11:17:07 PM
no serious though, leprechauns what if there were leprechauns how would they vote discuss with maps


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 06, 2012, 06:17:14 AM
I'm as serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer.

You can't contribute, moderator.  That would be like Richard Nixon writing the lyrics to an anti-Vietnam-War song.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 06, 2012, 08:33:58 PM
Oklahoma starts coming in:

Obama at 62%, getting killed outside of Oklahoma City. Told you so.

http://results.enr.clarityelections.com/OK/38065/73474/Web01/en/summary.html

62%. Like President Putin.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: LastVoter on March 06, 2012, 09:31:07 PM
Wasserman: trouble for Kaptur
Cleveland turnout double that of Toledo.  




Go dennis!
Helms Deep shall not fall!

Helms Deep is in Rohan, not Ohio. I suggest you retake Geography.
My first contribution.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Pingvin on March 07, 2012, 12:54:41 AM
Is the point of this thread to mock Romney?
I think that's the point of most threads.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 07, 2012, 02:03:43 AM
Nothing screams "adequately neutral-smelling for an office job in Memphis" like "lives in Ithaca, has a DUI conviction, and knows Boss Tweed".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on March 07, 2012, 05:57:13 PM
This is what Obama had Breitbart killed for?? Bummer.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on March 07, 2012, 07:55:18 PM
I lol'd.

I'm starting to think Bushie might not be coming home to a job.

You're right, I probably won't be coming home to a job.  I'll be coming home to a career.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 07, 2012, 08:19:32 PM
http://youtu.be/T6cDaFqOAmc

It's obvious that this tape has been selectively edited. Just wait until the whole thing comes out! RELEASE THE TAPES!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 07, 2012, 08:44:56 PM
good dark humor.

We all remember Bobby Kennedy was assassinated in June in California.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 07, 2012, 08:55:15 PM
Election Night 2012:

CNN News:
This is CNN Election Headquarters at 8pm.  At this opening hour we can forecast that Rick Santorum of Virginia has won 232 Electoral Votes at this opening hour to our Socialist Incumbent Racist Darkie President, who managed to win all of the commie states at this opening hour.  It is likely, if the Electoral College wasn't dominated by racist black communists, that Rick would've won by now.  But alas no.

Virginia with 13 Electoral Votes
Indiana with 11 Electoral Votes
South Carolina with 9 Electoral Votes
Ohio with 18 Electoral Votes
Pennsylvania with 20 Electoral Votes
North Carolina with 15 Electoral Votes
Kentucky with 8 Electoral Votes
West Virginia with 5 Electoral Votes
Alabama with 9 Electoral Votes
Mississippi with 6 Electoral Votes
Michigan with 16 Electoral Votes
Wisconsin with 10 Electoral Votes
Tennessee with 11 Electoral Votes
Louisiana with 8 Electoral Votes
New Hampshire with 4 Electoral Votes
Maine with 2 Electoral Votes
Maine Congressional District 2 with 1 Electoral Vote
Iowa with 6 Electoral Votes
Oklahoma with 7 Electoral Votes
Georgia with 16 Electoral Votes
Connecticut with 7 Electoral Votes
New Jersey with 14 Electoral Votes
Missouri with 10 Electoral Votes
Arkansas with 6 Electoral Votes
Kansas with 6 Electoral Votes
Nebraska with 2 Electoral Votes
All of Nebraska's Congressional Districts with 3 Electoral Votes


Meanwhile our evil commie President has won the following votes:

New York with 29 Electoral Votes
The People's Republic of Vermont with 3 Electoral Votes
The Soviet Socialist Republic of Maryland with 10 Electoral Votes
The Super Fascist Communisto State of the District of Colombia with 3 Electoral Votes
The People's Soviet Socialist Republic of Hawaii with 4 Electoral Votes
...........Delaware.......with 3 Electoral Votes
Illinois with 20 Electoral Votes
The Freedom Haters Paradise of Rhode Island with 4 Electoral Votes


Thanks to the communistic race baiting and voter buying mentality of the administration, President Barack Hussein Karl Marx Obama has been spared the landslide defeat at the Opening Hour.  It is likely he might even be spared of it after the Democrats have bought the hippe communist hispanic vote in the MOuntain West.  Because real white Americans have stood up to the President and his blatant race baiting politics that were revealed by the late Andrew Breitbart.  We will see how far the Communistic President will go to buy votes and destroy American Democracy to prevent the rightful rein of King Rick!

7:30 PM:

It is with great pleasure that we call the following states for the freedom fighter and true American Rick Santorum.  These states will put him over the top fo that monkey socialist communist whitey hater who just happens to be our incumbent President!:

Minnesota with 10 Electoral Votes
South Dakota with 3 Electoral Votes
North Dakota with 3 Electoral Votes
Maine Congressional District 1 with 1 Electoral Vote
Florida with 29 Electoral Votes
Texas with 38 Electoral Votes
Wyoming with 3 Electoral Votes
Montana with 3 Electoral Votes
Idaho with 4 Electoral Votes
Utah with 6 Electoral Votes
Alaska with 3 Electoral Votes
Massachusetts with 11 Electoral Votes.....wait a minute what!?


In other news, the President has bought out these following states with race baiting and ACORN Corruptoin:

Colorado with 9 Electoral Votes
Viva Le New Mexico with 5 Electoral Votes
Nevada with 6 Electoral Votes
Washington with 12 Electoral Votes
Oregon with 7 Electoral Votes
Arizona with 11 Electoral Votes
California with 55 Electoral Votes


By our estimates Rick Santorum will be elected the next President of the United States.....a feat that we can thank the late great Andrew Breitbart for seeing through his evil socialist racist tricks!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 08, 2012, 09:31:30 AM
I got invited to a KONY event on April 20th.  Sounds like we're gonna smoke pot to end child slavery.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 08, 2012, 06:18:13 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Negusa Nagast 🚀 on March 08, 2012, 06:41:05 PM
You misread my post, my talent acquisition contact is in DC, but I am staying right here in the best city in America, Oklahoma City.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Nation on March 08, 2012, 10:41:13 PM
This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

...Do you know the definition of "push polling?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.


This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

you really have your own little safe bubble alternative reality don't you? It must make life easier.

Irony.
...Do you know the definition of "irony?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.




Holy sh**t, "CaDan" might be the worst fuc*ing poster since CARLHAYDEN


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 08, 2012, 11:05:33 PM
This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

...Do you know the definition of "push polling?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.


This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

you really have your own little safe bubble alternative reality don't you? It must make life easier.

Irony.
...Do you know the definition of "irony?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.




Holy sh**t, "CaDan" might be the worst fuc*ing poster since CARLHAYDEN

You missed quite a few in your absence, such as Libertas, Derek, SvensonRS, feeblepizza, Rochambeau and the individual that we refer to only as "a certain Bakersfield resident". Hell I think you even missed Straha (not that I would consider him a bad poster obviously) and Robert Stark. But CaDan probably wins for the past year, and would make the top 10 for the past 5 years.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on March 09, 2012, 03:21:30 AM
CaDan is a good candidate for Blubb's next project.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: LastVoter on March 09, 2012, 03:59:43 AM
This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

...Do you know the definition of "push polling?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.


This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

you really have your own little safe bubble alternative reality don't you? It must make life easier.

Irony.
...Do you know the definition of "irony?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.




Holy sh**t, "CaDan" might be the worst fuc*ing poster since CARLHAYDEN

You missed quite a few in your absence, such as Libertas, Derek, SvensonRS, feeblepizza, Rochambeau and the individual that we refer to only as "a certain Bakersfield resident". Hell I think you even missed Straha (not that I would consider him a bad poster obviously) and Robert Stark. But CaDan probably wins for the past year, and would make the top 10 for the past 5 years.
Who is "a certain Bakersfield resident", and where can I find his posts?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on March 09, 2012, 05:58:57 AM
This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

...Do you know the definition of "push polling?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.


This sort of throws cold water on the skeptics who scoffed at that Virginia poll that showed him up by 17%.

Nope, it just shows that Putrid Propaganda Polling is push polling again.

you really have your own little safe bubble alternative reality don't you? It must make life easier.

Irony.
...Do you know the definition of "irony?"  Because your phrasing implies that you don't.




Holy sh**t, "CaDan" might be the worst fuc*ing poster since CARLHAYDEN

You missed quite a few in your absence, such as Libertas, Derek, SvensonRS, feeblepizza, Rochambeau and the individual that we refer to only as "a certain Bakersfield resident". Hell I think you even missed Straha (not that I would consider him a bad poster obviously) and Robert Stark. But CaDan probably wins for the past year, and would make the top 10 for the past 5 years.
Who is "a certain Bakersfield resident", and where can I find his posts?

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?action=profile;u=3593


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on March 09, 2012, 05:51:37 PM
Also, with the dawning of this brand new career, I have also learned one thing in the past 2 years, DON'T QUIT YOUR DARN JOB for any reason, especially for something that even has the appearance of criminal activity.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: LastVoter on March 09, 2012, 07:37:39 PM
Also, with the dawning of this brand new career, I have also learned one thing in the past 2 years, DON'T QUIT YOUR DARN JOB for any reason, especially for something that even has the appearance of criminal activity.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 09, 2012, 07:41:25 PM
Also, with the dawning of this brand new career, I have also learned one thing in the past 2 years, DON'T QUIT YOUR DARN JOB for any reason, especially for something that even has the appearance of criminal activity.


I feel a twinge of guilt or whatever over the Forum's continuous habit of making fun or light of this man, who obviously is not a fully functioning adult, and illustrates well the nebulous boundary between functional enough to be left alone and, not.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Alcon on March 09, 2012, 08:29:44 PM
I feel a twinge of guilt or whatever over the Forum's continuous habit of making fun or light of this man, who obviously is not a fully functioning adult, and illustrates well the nebulous boundary between functional enough to be left alone and, not.

do you have many habits that aren't continuous?  is pretension one of them?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 09, 2012, 09:12:55 PM
chill out bro.  Maslow said that self-actualized people don't make humor at others' expense.  meanwhile you've gone so far as to overtly attack me on your own Board.  chill out bro.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on March 10, 2012, 04:08:13 AM
chill out bro.  Maslow said that self-actualized people don't make humor at others' expense.  meanwhile you've gone so far as to overtly attack me on your own Board.  chill out bro.
That's ... hypocritical.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: JohnnyLongtorso on March 10, 2012, 07:10:03 AM
Guam may be only .05% of the population but it is worth a lot more than that in our hearts


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 10, 2012, 07:24:09 AM
Mitt Romney does not exist outside the text.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Alcon on March 10, 2012, 11:17:55 AM
chill out bro.  Maslow said that self-actualized people don't make humor at others' expense.  meanwhile you've gone so far as to overtly attack me on your own Board.  chill out bro.

I think you took my screwing with you a little more seriously than it was intended :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on March 10, 2012, 03:27:39 PM
I had a dream where Newt went insane after losing the nomination to a Romney-Santorum ticket and started frothing at the mouth and crying.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on March 10, 2012, 03:28:32 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on March 11, 2012, 06:26:28 AM
Is it acceptable to say that all religous are bad people?  Because I think the act of faith is bad - as in I dislike it.

For that matter, can I say I dislike all Mormons?

you dislike me?  :(

You're a religious?  Or a Mormon?  If you can stomach that stuff, I have to say it certainly calls your character into question.  What I'm getting at here though is - am I allowed to have such an opinion?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on March 11, 2012, 10:54:27 AM
That's cringeworthy - I  second my platypus friend from Australia, what's wrong with "equality club" or something? "Gay-Straight Alliance" sounds like the lamest superhero crimefighting unit in history.

Obviously this is the important issue here.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 11, 2012, 02:12:02 PM
Good to know our esteemed President is ahead in the key swing state of North Flohioginia.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on March 11, 2012, 05:10:13 PM
Not surprising Ron Paul won the Virgin Islands considering his supporters are most likely to be virgins.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 11, 2012, 05:13:45 PM
Damn The Professor has been on a roll lately:

According to CNN in North Dakota w/ 6% in

Santorum- 52%
Paul- 21%
Romney- 15%
Gingrich- 11%





No county map though. I'd say it's a few rural districts in which the caucuses lasted 5 minutes.

Don't bash rural districts. Their caucuses may have only lasted 5 minutes but that's a lot longer than you can last.

Wasserman: trouble for Kaptur
Cleveland turnout double that of Toledo.  




Go dennis!
Helms Deep shall not fall!

Helms Deep is in Rohan, not Ohio. I suggest you retake Geography.

So given what we have so far what does everyone think will happen in Ohio?

Keep in mind I am a professor so I know more than the average person in this topic.

The problem for Santorum is the three major cities (Columbus, Cleveland and Cincinnati) + their suburbs have not really come in yet. This is prime territory for the Mormon.

:D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: LastVoter on March 11, 2012, 05:37:18 PM
It's kind of sad that a professor doesn't understand the elf analogy.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 11, 2012, 11:20:54 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Alcon on March 12, 2012, 01:36:34 AM
My new favorite method of J. J. Management: Don't even try

Quote
Remember, there are 29 delegates outside of the South awarded on Tuesday.

Hawaii isn't the 'South'?

It's south, but not the South.  Note the capital.

Honolulu.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on March 12, 2012, 02:23:46 AM
On Obama crushing Romney among latinos:

Quick, somebody upload hablar_espanyol.exe!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 12, 2012, 09:20:18 AM
I thought St Petersburg was in Florida?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 12, 2012, 09:36:36 PM
BREAKING NEWS: Mitt Romney lynched by unemployed satirists.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 13, 2012, 06:59:15 AM
I pledge allegiance to the flag
Of the United States of America
And to the republic for which it stands
One nation
Under God
Indivisible
Not eating cats
Amen.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on March 13, 2012, 08:06:39 PM
I see you still have not yet received your HUMOR.DLL upgrade since you complain about the humorous spin I put on his decision.

It's not affordable to upgrade such an old and incompatible system like WINfield94. It's far more affordable to just junk it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on March 13, 2012, 09:49:01 PM
Yazoo County now 100% in.
Romney 702
Santorum 682
Gingrich 680

That urban vote really came in for Romney.

The elevators in the Yazoo City high-rises were broken, and Romney's supporters were already tipsy on chardonnay, so they couldn't make it down in time to vote.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on March 13, 2012, 11:07:32 PM
Happy belated birthday Mitt, here's your cheesy grits! Now that you've lost MS/AL, I assume you still want them.......Mitt? Mitt? YOUR GRITS, MITT. YOU LEFT YOUR CHEESY GRITS.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on March 14, 2012, 01:59:09 AM

Kalawao County (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalawao_County,_Hawaii)

Huh, interesting.

I feel they should have 9 delegates.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Alcon on March 14, 2012, 07:02:58 AM

Kalawao County (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalawao_County,_Hawaii)

Huh, interesting.

I feel they should have 9 delegates.

That caused a spit take...like the third in my whole life


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 14, 2012, 08:05:58 AM
It would be ridiculous for a man with a 9-digit personal fortune to use Medicare.

It is also ridiculous for a man with a 9-digit personal fortune not to be guillotined, and yet...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 14, 2012, 03:29:53 PM

Kalawao County (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalawao_County,_Hawaii)

Huh, interesting.

I feel they should have 9 delegates.

That caused a spit take...like the third in my whole life

I don't get it...I feel dumb...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 15, 2012, 05:39:28 AM
Obama has spent 4 years on vacation in Washington D.C.

With all of that time devoted to relaxation, he hasn't even had the time to instigate a socialist takeover of the federal government. :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on March 15, 2012, 05:50:58 AM

Kalawao County (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalawao_County,_Hawaii)

Huh, interesting.

I feel they should have 9 delegates.

That caused a spit take...like the third in my whole life

I don't get it...I feel dumb...
Did you read the link?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 15, 2012, 07:19:13 AM

Kalawao County (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalawao_County,_Hawaii)

Huh, interesting.

I feel they should have 9 delegates.

That caused a spit take...like the third in my whole life

I don't get it...I feel dumb...

Did you read the link?

Yup. Is it in connection to their population?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on March 15, 2012, 07:23:48 AM

Kalawao County (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalawao_County,_Hawaii)

Huh, interesting.

I feel they should have 9 delegates.

That caused a spit take...like the third in my whole life

I don't get it...I feel dumb...

Did you read the link?

Yup. Is it in connection to their population?
Exactly. 90 people -> 9 delegates.

Of course, the joke has now been entirely overexplained.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 15, 2012, 07:25:19 AM
xP


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on March 15, 2012, 02:27:03 PM
As a frequent wanna-be Floridian...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on March 15, 2012, 02:36:48 PM

That frickin Naso, he's had a lock on the Atlas Grimacing Comment Award since 2004.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 15, 2012, 02:56:52 PM
What is Papoy?  The Tagalog for 'photograph'?

No, dumb dumb, it's how people that have a cleft lip say "paper".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on March 16, 2012, 08:21:05 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 16, 2012, 09:01:14 PM

\m/


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 17, 2012, 05:37:31 PM
Context:

There's really no 'right' or 'wrong' cup size, Wong:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on March 17, 2012, 10:37:19 PM
He only saved one girl? Man, he must have sucked as a Mormon missionary.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on March 18, 2012, 02:33:09 PM


Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO: 34,716,780 views.

Take Me Home Tonight by Eddie Money: 663,611 views.

I don't want to live on this planet anymore.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on March 19, 2012, 02:01:52 AM
This thread (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=150926) starts out with a pretty dumb premise, but then takes a turn for the awesome.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on March 19, 2012, 01:08:30 PM
I don't usually read through multi-page election results threads, but the relatively short one for Puerto Rico turned up some gems:


Dog on Car- 53
Not safe to Google- 26
Lucky Charms Leprechaun- 12
President of the Moon- 9


http://64.185.222.182/cee_events/PRIMARIAS_PARTIDO_REPUBLICANO_2012_36/NOCHE_DEL_EVENTO_55/default.html

That page is in Spanish, so those results dont count. Only results posted in the language of opportunity and freedom are good honest American results. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 20, 2012, 12:19:19 AM
I might be interested, but I'm about to head out for the night.  I'm celebrating St. Patrick's Day at a British-themed pub.  Perhaps I should celebrate the irony by trying to blow it up.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on March 20, 2012, 12:17:28 PM
In France, it might have been mistaken for Breton. I cannot imagine their fate in that case...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on March 20, 2012, 06:37:53 PM

Beaver county? Sounds like my kind of county.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on March 20, 2012, 09:55:36 PM
Bleakly hilarious:

Or is the right interpretation of the Florida law that in every altercation whoever kills his/her opponient is, by definition, acting in self-defense? I would appreciate knowing that for sure: if that is, indeed, is the case (which seems to be the only explanation why Martin fighting Zimmerman would matter at all), I would do my best to avoid ever finding myself in Florida again, as a matter of personal safety.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 21, 2012, 01:24:36 AM
The question I don't understand is how they make a case. To appeal to the federal court they would have to argue that they are a racial or language minority. Religion is not covered by the 15th amendment, and probably by the 1st amendment it can't be used.

Imagine getting it up to the Supreme Court and arguing it in front of the current roster of the Justices :)))

Justice Ginsburg: "Would, say, some of us present here be considered a part of the same protected minority".

NY Jew: "With all due respect, justice, I would say that this minority is defined not merely in terms of ancestral usage of Yiddish, but in terms of current cultural practice and personal identification".

Justice Kagan "Are you suggesting that myself and Justice Ginsburg are not Jewish?"

NY Jew: "I wouldn't say that. But, the self-hating Jews might as well be considered anti-semites, and, so, definitely, would not be part of the protected minority. Then, of course, come to think about this, as the example of Bob Turner shows, Justice Scalia might well be part of it".

I just can imagine it. It would be a great show :))


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 21, 2012, 02:54:42 PM
Ask him about McDonnell helping Romney in Virginia and North Carolina when he is on the ticket.

In his case VP would stand for Vaginal Probe.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 21, 2012, 09:20:28 PM
Didn't realise that Occupiers were so pro-Santorum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on March 23, 2012, 07:43:16 PM
Click for context:

Hey, at least a complete breach of privacy is consistent with the GOP's views!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 24, 2012, 09:21:19 AM
Hillary Rodham Clinton- Arkansas
()

If my Cialis worked as long as it was supposed too I woudl have a third leg right about now...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on March 24, 2012, 09:44:54 AM
Guys, all I have to say is we better hope Naso posts his thoughts on the Treyvon Martin situation on the forum just as he did on Facebook. Instant. Classic. Thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on March 24, 2012, 09:51:55 AM
Guys, all I have to say is we better hope Naso posts his thoughts on the Treyvon Martin situation on the forum just as he did on Facebook. Instant. Classic. Thread.
Already has.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on March 24, 2012, 09:57:27 AM
Guys, all I have to say is we better hope Naso posts his thoughts on the Treyvon Martin situation on the forum just as he did on Facebook. Instant. Classic. Thread.
Already has.

Where? General Discussion? And it has to be word for word what he posted on Facebook or it doesn't count.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 24, 2012, 01:03:30 PM
Since I'm not friends with Mike on the Facebooks, was it veiled racism as usual?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 24, 2012, 09:15:26 PM
I feel horrible for laughing at this.

Has that hoodie been appropriately detained, yet?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on March 25, 2012, 12:36:11 AM
I don't understand why anyone would want to own a pit bull.

"Woah, look at the jaws on that thing! I bet it could tear the wheels off a car! Oh, it bit a kid, what a surprise!"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on March 25, 2012, 04:44:26 AM
Since I'm not friends with Mike on the Facebooks, was it veiled racism as usual?
It wore a hoodie, not a veil.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on March 25, 2012, 11:36:19 AM
So, we are now officially after the deluge?

Landmark moment.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on March 25, 2012, 02:33:41 PM

Dammit, was about to put that quote in.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 25, 2012, 04:14:43 PM
I want to be able to look back 20 years from now and say "Yes, I helped America return to her greatness."

I'll be doing whatever I can to make sure Mitt Romney carries the state of Indiana this November.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychotherapy


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 25, 2012, 05:17:49 PM
Since we no longer have deluge thread:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 25, 2012, 05:49:59 PM
I'm still hopeful there are some interesting 3rd party choices, but with the options limited to those two...Obama....he has the better singing voice.
Lucifer had a great singing voice too...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 25, 2012, 06:49:58 PM
Where do you think I learned my moves?

Click for context.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 25, 2012, 06:54:38 PM
It was clearly an acute outbreak of cutie pox.

(yes, this is a pony reference)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 25, 2012, 08:52:05 PM
Sorry Nathan- Southern schools tend to have better looking gals...I was in Jacksonville well before I moved to Florida in February 1965 I believe- was with a few sailors from Mayport and we were at this bar on the river- a few belles from Jacksonville U were down at the other end of the bar. We sent them some vodka cranberries and they came on over...this one little pothead from a town called Monticello FL (not pronounced MontiCHello I was told!) was on to me all night...let's just say I was drier then the Sahara the next morning- I had nothign left!!! And she still wanted more!!!!!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Sam Spade on March 25, 2012, 10:18:28 PM
Quote from: Assemblyman & Queen Mum Inks.LWC
OK - thread locked.  It was stupid to let it go on this long.  It's now officially done.

Quote from: Assemblyman & Queen Mum Inks.LWC
I'll admit I made a mistake in the way I locked this thread, specifically in not explaining why I  did so.  So, I will do that now:

1. It had been discussed for a while that this thread was essentially one big personal attack, and we'd been discussing locking it.
2. Several posters engaged in back-and-forth of personal attacks, resulting in me deleting a page and a half of posts.
3. It was a combination of not wanting to have to do the work to patrol a thread (already likely to have problems) for personal attacks, as well as the fact that Mikado and myself believe that this thread is counterproductive to Dave's vision for the forum that resulted in me deciding to lock the thread.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home. on March 25, 2012, 10:21:02 PM
what is Dave's vision, anyway?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 25, 2012, 10:22:33 PM
Dave's vision for the forum    lol


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 25, 2012, 10:25:38 PM
Quote from: Assemblyman & Queen Mum Inks.LWC
OK - thread locked.  It was stupid to let it go on this long.  It's now officially done.

Quote from: Assemblyman & Queen Mum Inks.LWC
I'll admit I made a mistake in the way I locked this thread, specifically in not explaining why I  did so.  So, I will do that now:

1. It had been discussed for a while that this thread was essentially one big personal attack, and we'd been discussing locking it.
2. Several posters engaged in back-and-forth of personal attacks, resulting in me deleting a page and a half of posts.
3. It was a combination of not wanting to have to do the work to patrol a thread (already likely to have problems) for personal attacks, as well as the fact that Mikado and myself believe that this thread is counterproductive to Dave's vision for the forum that resulted in me deciding to lock the thread.



I like how he admits that he doesn't actually want to work.  lol


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 26, 2012, 05:12:13 AM

Who is this Dave you speak of?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: hawkeye59 on March 26, 2012, 07:32:50 AM
Let's just merge the two revered institutes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on March 26, 2012, 09:18:21 AM
Dave's vision for the forum    lol

As I said in the other thread, it's nice that after nearly a decade Dave has finally let us (well some of us) know what kind of forum he wants . . .


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on March 26, 2012, 11:58:48 AM
Quote from: Assemblyman & Queen Mum Inks.LWC
OK - thread locked.  It was stupid to let it go on this long.  It's now officially done.

Quote from: Assemblyman & Queen Mum Inks.LWC
I'll admit I made a mistake in the way I locked this thread, specifically in not explaining why I  did so.  So, I will do that now:

1. It had been discussed for a while that this thread was essentially one big personal attack, and we'd been discussing locking it.
2. Several posters engaged in back-and-forth of personal attacks, resulting in me deleting a page and a half of posts.
3. It was a combination of not wanting to have to do the work to patrol a thread (already likely to have problems) for personal attacks, as well as the fact that Mikado and myself believe that this thread is counterproductive to Dave's vision for the forum that resulted in me deciding to lock the thread.



I like how he admits that he doesn't actually want to work.  lol
That's the only reason the post belongs here and not in the deluge!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 26, 2012, 03:13:33 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on March 26, 2012, 06:18:25 PM
Relying on "Dave's vision" makes about as much sense as interpreting the Constitution based on "original intent".

Most of the Democrats on here have a vision for this place that can be summarized succinctly: Diet Democratic Underground.

Dave is obviously less partisan than the above-mentioned Democrats. I suspect he sees this as a place to discuss election results, along with being a forum for exchange of various analyses, in a respectful, bipartisan manner (e.g., not calling somebody absurd/trollish for not supporting a Democrat for president).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on March 26, 2012, 06:23:22 PM
According to Nym, he was accidentially unbanned.  The mistake has been rectified.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on March 26, 2012, 06:24:13 PM
You guys should use a fake title to pique Dave's interest. Claim that there's some error with the 1884 South Dakota map or something. Has there been any indication that he has read a non-technical thread since post-2003?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 26, 2012, 06:35:39 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 26, 2012, 06:41:15 PM
Is this the new Deluge?

Most of the Democrats on here have a vision for this place that can be summarized succinctly: Diet Democratic Underground.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 26, 2012, 06:46:53 PM
You guys should use a fake title to pique Dave's interest. Claim that there's some error with the 1884 South Dakota map or something. Has there been any indication that he has read a non-technical thread since post-2003?

classic post there.  a side effect of my depression/anxiety issues is that I hardly ever laugh out loud any more, particularly not in public, but I just did now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 26, 2012, 08:18:49 PM
opebo, I'm pretty sure sex in 1965, and sex in 2012 still has the same meaning :P

No buddy, sex in 1965 was with a girl.  Sex in 2012 is with a piece of rubber.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on March 26, 2012, 08:37:39 PM
I must have written something like this before, but stop trying to ingratiate yourself in that way. It's cringeworthy.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 26, 2012, 09:30:13 PM
I must have written something like this before, but stop trying to ingratiate yourself in that way. It's cringeworthy.

come on, be easy on the kid, he's 15.  your inability seemingly to enjoy anything with levity is cringeworthy, from the perspective of someone who has long liked and respected you and didn't always feel that this was the case.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on March 26, 2012, 10:29:27 PM
This guy is awesome.

Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich are responsible for this. We had the perfect candidate to defeat Obama with, the one Republican we could effectively triangulate with, and now everything is in jeopardy because of a few troublemakers such as Santorum, Gingrich, et al.

Romney is the new Reagan of freedomnomics. Romney will restore respectability to Republicanism.

UNITE THE RIGHT WITH MITT ROMNEY 2012!

NOBAMA!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Sbane on March 26, 2012, 10:54:47 PM
I like how how posts that would have ended up in the deluge now end up here. You have accomplished a lot, Inks and Mikado. Good job guys!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: I'm JewCon in name only. on March 26, 2012, 10:56:54 PM
I like how how posts that would have ended up in the deluge now end up here. You have accomplished a lot, Inks and Mikado. Good job guys!

Kinda like the McCain(Inks)-Feingold (Mikado) Campaign Finance Reform Act of 2002!


Yay loopholes!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on March 27, 2012, 07:21:25 AM
come on, be easy on the kid, he's 15.

That's the whole point. I'm trying to reduce his future embarrassment.

Quote
your inability seemingly to enjoy anything with levity is cringeworthy, from the perspective of someone who has long liked and respected you and didn't always feel that this was the case.

Maybe this forum isn't as fun as it was or something along those lines.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 27, 2012, 08:04:27 AM
Al, I don't know why you expect me to know that you posted something similar to that, as I don't read your posts often, and for good reason: you do not make your point, you violently slam your point into the face of the person you're attempting to ridicule, to make them feel like a lesser person. You're one of the most respected members of this forum and yet you have no respect for the people that do everything  but kiss the ground you walk on. The only thing cringeworthy in this situation is that you took time out of your day to ridicule a 15 year old kid on an internet forum for making a post in a thread. I don't need to answer to you and feel bad. This is the institute of comedy thread, I thought that post was funny, it was a post that I had seen, therefore I posted it here. As far as I'm concerned, I'm done with this discussion. It's over. There is no reason to go further.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 27, 2012, 08:10:00 AM
Deluge:

This is news? The black population does not endorse homosexuality.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 27, 2012, 08:44:24 AM
Do we get death-points for putting our names on this?

Don't worry, the death points will only accrue to your non-union Mexican equivalent: Seńor Coconut.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 27, 2012, 08:45:40 AM
Over-contributing today:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on March 27, 2012, 11:41:52 AM
Allow me to use an analogy to explain where this forum's at right now.

In 1576 the Netherlands had been going trough a rough decade of rebellion and warfare. A coalition of Lutherans and Calvinists under William of Orange effectively controlled the North, and refused to acknowledge the legitimacy of the 'Iron Duke' of Alva as the Governor in name of Philip II of Spain (while noone contested the legitimacy of Philip himself as sovereign). Alva was one of the most bloodthirsty rulers the 16 Provinces had ever known and the 1568 execution of the catholic Counts Egmont and Hoorne for their lack of fervour in squashing the 1566 Beeldenstorm had resulted in great unrest in the Southern half of the Netherlands. Yet, with some minor exceptions, there was no activity against the Spaniards on behalf of the Catholic nobility and burghers.

All of this changed when, in 1575, the Spanish army besieging Zierikzee on the Zealandish isle of Schouwen-Duiveland went beserk after payment was deferred one time too much. The resulting mutiny culminated in a massacre in Antwerp that would enter history books as the 'Spanish Fury'. The shocked nobility of the entire Netherlands rallied together and in 1576 all 16 provinces united in the Pacification of Ghent, an agreement that demanded the disappearance of all foreign troops from Netherlandic soil.

Ultimately religious differences and the advent of the widely respected Alexander Farnese of Parma as the new Governor would rip the General Union apart into the pro-Spanish Union of Atrecht and the Union of Utrecht/Closer Union, yet for that one moment the 16 provinces stood united, even some of the most prominently catholic and pro-Spanish politicians signed the Pacification and the North was irreparably lost for the Spanish crown.

Who will be our William of Orange? Will we stand together or will we be shredded apart and consumed by the fire we've unleashed?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on March 27, 2012, 01:14:52 PM
Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And, but for the interference with his arrangement, there would be no cause for such marriage. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.

Also posted in the Deluge because it's the best illustration of Poe's Law I've seen maybe ever, especially considering its provenance.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 27, 2012, 02:04:09 PM
Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And, but for the interference with his arrangement, there would be no cause for such marriage. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.

Also posted in the Deluge because it's the best illustration of Poe's Law I've seen maybe ever, especially considering its provenance.

This is the most blatantly racist thing I have ever seen someone post.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on March 27, 2012, 02:10:51 PM
Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And, but for the interference with his arrangement, there would be no cause for such marriage. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.

Also posted in the Deluge because it's the best illustration of Poe's Law I've seen maybe ever, especially considering its provenance.

This is the most blatantly racist thing I have ever seen someone post.

Obviously. As I said, Poe's Law. I can't believe that even Krazen could be that racist, but I also can't believe that he could have a sense of humor about something like this, so I really didn't know what to do with the post. It's in the Deluge as well, obviously.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Reginald on March 27, 2012, 02:49:06 PM
Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And, but for the interference with his arrangement, there would be no cause for such marriage. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.

Also posted in the Deluge because it's the best illustration of Poe's Law I've seen maybe ever, especially considering its provenance.

This is the most blatantly racist thing I have ever seen someone post.

Obviously. As I said, Poe's Law. I can't believe that even Krazen could be that racist, but I also can't believe that he could have a sense of humor about something like this, so I really didn't know what to do with the post. It's in the Deluge as well, obviously.

For what it's worth, he didn't make this up himself (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loving_v._Virginia) (a fact you may have alluded to in your initial post, but reiterated just to provide context...), so I imagine he thought he was being clever, in some obviously perverse way.



Anyhow, an entry:

I was hoping that this thread would bring seanobr around.

I know what you mean.  It's so strange to see the R-RI avatar attached to an intelligent and worthwhile post for once.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on March 28, 2012, 01:07:45 AM
So, a while back my nephew came back from third grade and asked his parents who this "Jesus" guy his classmates were talking about was.  My brother-in-law explained the basic story (my nephew had no clue what a "virgin" was, so it was difficult), and at the end, my brother-in-law explained the Resurrection.  My nephew solemnly said, "he was the first zombie."

The kid's going to turn out all right.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on March 28, 2012, 10:22:38 AM
Context (very broadly defined) needed:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 28, 2012, 10:49:52 AM
Context (very broadly defined) needed:


lmao


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on March 28, 2012, 12:18:59 PM

Alyosha kills Dmitri and Ivan marries a bottle of cognac.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 28, 2012, 06:53:47 PM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on March 28, 2012, 07:11:04 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 28, 2012, 07:54:17 PM
I kinda hoped in the back of my mind that would end up here :P /conceited


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on March 28, 2012, 10:40:58 PM

Dmitri, chowing down on nuts: "How did it go again?  Gott der Vater, Gott der Sohn... what was the last...urk..."
Alyosha, from behind with a bloody pestle: "Gott der Heilige Geist, brother."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on March 28, 2012, 11:40:16 PM
Intellectual jokes suck.  Let's talk about boobs and farts instead.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on March 29, 2012, 12:00:26 PM
Intellectual jokes suck.  Let's talk about boobs and farts instead.

And Kenya


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on March 29, 2012, 12:21:41 PM
Intellectual jokes suck.  Let's talk about boobs and farts instead.

I sharted the other day.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on March 29, 2012, 01:39:48 PM
Dreams are obviously super-accurate in predicting political events.

You're telling me that Lt. Gov. Winthrop Rockefeller is actually still dead, not running helicopter tours in Baja while preparing his comeback?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on March 30, 2012, 10:11:05 PM
Tory, count yourself lucky no one is proposing what we all know needs to be done.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on March 31, 2012, 12:04:36 PM
Too bad he didn't go full Michael Richards though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 31, 2012, 01:13:13 PM
Erectile dysfunction is pretty high up on the list, I suppose. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 31, 2012, 04:55:06 PM
Had to decide whether to put this in the Institute or the Sulfur Mine:

No way - my preferred ticket would be Palin-Paul.

Edit: Darn, you made me forget this was my 1000th Atlus post and I didn't even use grandeur or make it fun.  I'll make up for that: If the president is reelected he will destroy whats left of this fragile country and announce himself dictator.  Romney will be so weak if elected that he will fold to every democratic desire during the off periods between elections.  They are both globalists and socialists.  We all need to wake up to that.

This is the worst post ever made in the history of the forum. You should feel bad and your parents should be arrested.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on March 31, 2012, 04:56:44 PM
It's definitely sulfur material. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on March 31, 2012, 04:57:17 PM
It's definitely sulfur material. :P

I'll put it in the mine too :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on March 31, 2012, 06:14:00 PM

Low-sulfur at best.  I was tempted to quote the posting of this in the sulphur mine into the deluge, but it wasn't that wet either.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on March 31, 2012, 08:08:49 PM
BRTD would masturbate to every page of every copy, then make a book fort out of the used books.

At least he wont have to buy nails.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on April 01, 2012, 03:45:21 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=151510.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on April 01, 2012, 04:50:23 PM
I was wondering if anyone would fall for it, hah. But I definitely did some worship this morning.

people here have been predicting some massive BRTD shift to lifestyle conservatism since at least 2005.  it is at least possible yet, he isn't 30, but to view it as some sort of inevitability is a crude oversimplification: there is the chance that he simply is what he is.

And for the record, I've never really understood why some were so adamant on that. It's not like there's tons of conservative influence in my social circle or anything.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on April 02, 2012, 11:48:54 AM
Truly sorry about your friend, oakvale, but nevertheless:

Fun fact: I know someone who got mugged & stabbed on April Fool's Day, which meant that it took a while before anyone realised it wasn't a joke in poor taste. *facepalm*

What ? He got stabbed for real because it was April Fool's day ?

This is America. We take our April Fool's Day seriously.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 02, 2012, 01:20:29 PM
I'm sorry, it's Doctor President Ron Paul. Get it right sheeple!

correction; full title:

The Honorable Doctor President Rep. Ron Paul MD, Defender Of The Constitution and Savior of Liberty, Father of the High Priest of the Church of Aqua Buddha


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on April 02, 2012, 07:59:55 PM
From the thread "Did Obama win black Republicans?" in the 2008 U.S. Presidential Election Results board.

Who knows? Where are Black Republicans concentrated, anyways
Cable news networks.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on April 03, 2012, 08:49:10 PM
J.J.'s reasoning never ceases to amaze: his take on why Santorum mentioned the Hessians' role during the Revolutionary War...


Anyone else find it odd that Santorum referred to Hessians in his speech... Really... Hessians?

Lot of Germans in PA.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on April 03, 2012, 08:56:17 PM
J.J.'s reasoning never ceases to amaze: his take on why Santorum mentioned the Hessians' role during the Revolutionary War...


Anyone else find it odd that Santorum referred to Hessians in his speech... Really... Hessians?

Lot of Germans in PA.

just earned a very rare audible chuckle out of Tweed, who never laughs due to clinical depression.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on April 04, 2012, 12:20:09 PM
What did Santo say about me and one of my favorite authors (Johann Gottfried Seume, who in his youth was sold by the Hessen-Kasselers to England as a soldier... though he didn't see combat, landing in Halifax in 1782, and anyways wasn't actually a Hessian.)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on April 04, 2012, 04:48:59 PM
Click for context:
A lady's frock and an enormous cod-piece.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on April 04, 2012, 11:41:38 PM
I'm enjoying Al's thread reviews lately.

This is an extraordinarily stupid thread.

This thread is deeply embarrassing on so many levels.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Pingvin on April 05, 2012, 10:28:05 AM
A friend of mine thought the Kony rally thing scheduled for 4/20 was about trying to free Kony who was "some kind of political prisoner," even. 

4/20 enslave children everyday.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on April 05, 2012, 12:03:20 PM
I'm enjoying Al's thread reviews lately.

This is an extraordinarily stupid thread.

This thread is deeply embarrassing on so many levels.

One wonders if we mere mortals could get away with such comments - I greatly doubt it.  Though it isn't a direct 'personal attack' on a particular poster, it is a 'personal attack' on all who posted in the negatively reviewed threads.  And obviously it is 'trolling'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on April 05, 2012, 12:06:02 PM
I'm enjoying Al's thread reviews lately.

This is an extraordinarily stupid thread.

This thread is deeply embarrassing on so many levels.

One wonders if we mere mortals could get away with such comments - I greatly doubt it.  Though it isn't a direct 'personal attack' on a particular poster, it is a 'personal attack' on all who posted in the negatively reviewed threads.  And obviously it is 'trolling'.

It's not clear Alcon or Lunar are actually monitoring that Board so  give it a shot ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on April 05, 2012, 12:08:00 PM
Happily the doctrine of 'personal attack' has yet to be extended to such absurdities.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on April 05, 2012, 12:23:04 PM
Happily the doctrine of 'personal attack' has yet to be extended to such absurdities.

For you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on April 05, 2012, 12:33:35 PM
Happily the doctrine of 'personal attack' has yet to be extended to such absurdities.

For you.

No, no. You as well, mon.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on April 05, 2012, 12:39:21 PM
See the thread title for context:

For me it is usually 15-45 minutes after I eat or have coffee.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on April 05, 2012, 01:56:38 PM
Nah, everything is going exactly according to Mitt Romney's plan. He's following a "slow and steady" strategy and is currently on course to finally reach 100% support with Republican voters some time in late 2015, setting him up strongly for the 2016 primaries.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on April 05, 2012, 10:12:37 PM
I'd like to enter the fact that Bushie's name is now "RomneyKenya" into the Institute.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on April 06, 2012, 03:56:13 AM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Republican_Party_(United_States)
[/hackery]

That would be for The Oil Well of Hate.  Keep your fossil fuels straight.  Coal is Democratic, Oil is Republican.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on April 06, 2012, 04:35:28 AM
No, I would probably try and help out his drug business to make it more successful at the expense of the for-profit prisons that have purchased more authoritarian government policy.

I loathe the idea of private prisons.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 06, 2012, 10:35:47 AM
Christie will use his ninja superpowers to make Newark into a Republican stronghold.

Wait, ninjas don't weigh 400 pounds.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on April 06, 2012, 07:47:28 PM
Click for context:

For me it is usually 15-45 minutes after I eat or have coffee.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 06, 2012, 10:17:24 PM

Ahem

See the thread title for context:

For me it is usually 15-45 minutes after I eat or have coffee.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on April 07, 2012, 12:01:22 PM

Though Inks timing may have been off, receiving this sort of accolade from him is.. well, a very strange feeling.  Like being told by your captors 'that's a nice tie' as they haul you off to Auschwitz.  The chill does run up the spine.

So I respond 'thank you Gruppenführer'... very nervously, and with the deepest of bows and scrapes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 07, 2012, 02:03:56 PM
Though Inks timing may have been off, receiving this sort of accolade from him is.. well, a very strange feeling.  Like being told by your captors 'that's a nice tie' as they haul you off to Auschwitz.  The chill does run up the spine.

So I respond 'thank you Gruppenführer'... very nervously, and with the deepest of bows and scrapes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on April 07, 2012, 06:13:19 PM
This could go in the Deluge as well.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on April 08, 2012, 11:40:15 PM
Please delete that, Snowstalker. It's disturbing and no one wants to see that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 09, 2012, 05:06:45 AM
Please delete that, Snowstalker. It's disturbing and no one wants to see that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on April 09, 2012, 07:33:56 AM
It's dead.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 09, 2012, 06:34:31 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on April 10, 2012, 12:59:10 PM


Iraqi WMD isn't a lie, it was bad information. If you tell someone you think the restaurant looks like it doesn't have a long wait, only to walk inside and discover it does, does that mean you deliberately lied? No.

Brilliant analogy. And then, after realizing that there is a long wait, you figure, "Let's stick around and see what that salad bar is all about." Of course, half way through the wait, another guest might announce that there actually isn't the long wait that everyone thought there was. He would subsequently be voted out of the area by 17 points, of course, but he'll be back. Don't you worry.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 10, 2012, 06:13:13 PM
Quote
Based solely off of PM score, you should take a look at Buddy Roemer. He's very strong on anti-corruption and rides in the middle of the social spectrum. Much more reasonable than Herman Cain. Not my candidate, though

His vetoes on abortion regulations make him unacceptable to me.

Why is that so important to you?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on April 10, 2012, 07:24:52 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 10, 2012, 09:11:14 PM
You should vote for Newt Gingrich.

- Has a transformational, profound vision.

- Catholic.

- Likes heterosexual marriage so much he's done it three times.

- Cheerful.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: LastVoter on April 11, 2012, 12:11:02 AM
You should vote for Newt Gingrich.

- Has a transformational, profound vision.

- Catholic.

- Likes heterosexual marriage so much he's done it three times.

- Cheerful.
+1


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on April 11, 2012, 05:28:26 AM
opebo refers to bodegas as hot peppers and doo-rags.

I guess if I were stuck back in the Bad Place I'd have to try to get some of that black market Coke from Mexico, but wen I used to get it years ago it seemed like nine times out of ten it was flat.

It's called the mexican aisle bro.

Back when I still lived in the Bad Place, you had to go to little Habaneros or Bandanas or whatever you call those little Mexican corner stores (campesinos? Casa Diegos?), in order to get the black market Mexican Coke, and it was usually a little worse for wear due to being smuggled into the country.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 11, 2012, 06:29:38 PM
Cracker Barrell and Church's Chicken are polar opposites? That's racist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on April 11, 2012, 07:32:34 PM
Winfield responds to a fake article (I feel like this isn't the first time for him) and kinda sorta tries to joke around:

Gingrich speaks to 4 exuberant supporters the following day at the community hall in Beulah, Mississippi.

My friends, thank you for coming here and taking time out of your busy schedules.  Last evening, I had a heart to heart phone conversation with Governor Romney.  He has advised me that he now sees the error of his ways, and that he realizes that I am the only Republican who can run against Obama and win.  The Governor has acknowledged my superior intellect and amazing charisma, and has told me that I am the only Republican who can regain women voters back into the Republican column, as he told me given my remarkable abilities at attracting many women already.

My friends, when you next hear from me, I will be addressing you from either the moon or the planet Neptune, I am not sure which.

May the force be with you.  For now, over and out.  


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on April 11, 2012, 09:34:40 PM
Yeah, I interpreted this as you dislike him now :P I was excited :(

Yeah. Im a Adam Hasner (not in actual views) guy now. I have been volunteering in his office, and I am going to meet T-Paw next Friday, if it all goes to plan.

Bring a pillow and chamomile tea.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Marokai Backbeat on April 12, 2012, 12:16:59 AM
Ugh. I was really hoping the Socialists would place in fourth here, but it looks like the Grits are going to prevent that from happening.

Do you write for the Daily Telegraph c. 1959?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on April 12, 2012, 11:01:42 AM
If the answer is 'Gerard Kennedy' then the question is a deeply stupid one.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on April 12, 2012, 05:35:24 PM
Mitt Romney is the frontrunners now!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 13, 2012, 03:21:16 PM

Uh oh, Bushie's stomach bug has gained sentience and found the Atlas.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 13, 2012, 05:54:22 PM
Context:

You know what they say, America.  Once you go black, you never go back.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on April 13, 2012, 06:50:20 PM
My parents had maid services during my junior year in college.  It scared the hell out of me when I visited during Winter Break, mostly because I had no idea that my parents even had maid service.  I was in my room working up my motivation when this short Hispanic lady just burst into my room!
I almost had a heart attack at age 21.
She was freaked out too and went about cleaning other areas.  I managed to clean a few spots in my room (mostly just taking some water glasses downstairs and throwing my bedding sheets into the washing machine, throwing all of the clothes on my floor into a suitcase) and then gave them the go ahead and sped off to the nearest bar so I could get my heart rate back down to a non-life threatening level.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 14, 2012, 08:37:25 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 14, 2012, 10:32:12 AM

Goddammit I was just gonna post this :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on April 15, 2012, 11:45:39 AM
This is less a hilarious post than a post about a hilarious fact but I still think it belongs here.

Oh yes, Connecticut for Lieberman was taken over by an anti-Lieberman faction. Should have remembered.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on April 15, 2012, 12:35:17 PM
Yes, the chairman of the Connecticut for Lieberman Party has actually called for Lieberman to resign his Senate seat.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on April 15, 2012, 02:53:59 PM
Maybe that should go here (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=151793.0)?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 15, 2012, 03:40:27 PM

Obviously to aid the Christians (like Bonhoffer) who opposed Hitler. Also as a racial minority (Amerindian) even the Anglo/German side of me wouldn't protect me from losing God given civil liberties.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on April 15, 2012, 06:37:00 PM
Hold on sec... Barack Obama sweeps the Deep South?  In 1924???

This reflects Coolidge's bad performance being weaker than Obama's bad performance. Obviously, if Obama was somehow nominated in 1924 he'd lose by comical margins there.

I can see it.

Southerner A : "So our choice for President is between this Yankee Republican and some negro who claims to have traveled back in time 84 years and calls himself a Democrat"
Southerner B : "Are you kidding me?"
Southerner A : "It's true"
Southerner B : "No way!"
Southerner A: "Yes. I guess we have to vote for the Yankee Republican"
Southerner B: "Damn it"
Southerner A: "I know, this is awful"
Southerner B: "I still can't believe it"
Southerner A: "I know, it's pretty absurd"
Southerner B: "I could believe the part of about time travel, but a negro Democrat running for President?"
Southerner A: "Yeah, that's ridiculous"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 16, 2012, 07:52:10 AM
[ ] Barack Obama (D)
[ ] Mitt Romney (R)
[ ] W. Mitt Romney (I)
[ ] W. M. Romney (I)
[ ] Willard M. Romney (Socialist Labor)
[ ] Willard Mitt Romney (Constitution)
[ ] Mittens Romney (Silly Hats Party)
[ ] Gromit Romney (Libertarian)
[ ] Tree-Loving Romney (Green)
[ ] MITTBOT 2.0 (MICROSOFT VISTA)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 16, 2012, 02:46:38 PM
Can I change my name at all?
And what username would you recommend me?

Pepto-Bismol


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on April 17, 2012, 07:42:10 PM
His opposition to the Iraq War in 2002-2003 made some headlines, as did his appointment to the African Union's "Council of the Wise" but yeah other than that he basically hadn't done anything notable since he was overthrown in 1965.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on April 17, 2012, 10:41:08 PM
b) broke down in tears of admiration at his own propaganda video.

Echoes of a certain London mayoral candidate there.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on April 18, 2012, 01:56:15 PM
hate to clue you in, but homosexuality ain't exactly the embracement of human reproduction.

Hate to clue you in, but 'embracement' isn't a real word


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on April 18, 2012, 02:21:36 PM
Given how important Vice-Presidential picks always are, we need to consider some out-of-the-box possibilites. Is Pete Wilson still alive? If so, Romney should pick him and pick up California easily. If not, Romney can convert him to Mormonism regardless.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on April 19, 2012, 04:02:13 PM
I feel like Naso has ruined the concept of "cougar sex" for me, but congratulations if you're into that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on April 19, 2012, 04:04:34 PM
FLOWCHART

<Is the politician/partisan dead?> ───────no──────> [Incite partisan hackery.]
           │                                                    ↑
           │                                                    │
          yes                                                   │
           │                                                    │
           ↓                                                    │
<Does the politician share your political beliefs?>  ─────no────┘
           │
           │
          yes
           │
           ↓
        [RIP  :( ]
         
         





Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on April 19, 2012, 04:06:09 PM
http://www.publicpolicypolling.com/pdf/2011/PPP_Release_US_041912.pdf



Romney/Christie: 47%
Obama/Biden: 47%



Romney is on the rise as he consolidates Republican support.

Except you forgot the part where Obama leads Ronney 49-46.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Miles on April 19, 2012, 04:08:33 PM
http://www.publicpolicypolling.com/pdf/2011/PPP_Release_US_041912.pdf



Romney/Christie: 47%
Obama/Biden: 47%



Romney is on the rise as he consolidates Republican support.

Except you forgot the part where Obama leads Ronney 49-46.

I fixed the typo now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on April 19, 2012, 11:26:52 PM
I am in a pickle. I'm attracted to this one girl, very much so, a grade below. She seems very friendly, but I'm fairly incompetent in reading her messages and gauging where she stands. Indeed we just sat next to each other and read a book together the other day, which I was just lost on- where does politeness end, and is it just a trap? I  can either become more overt or back out, and I'm leaning towards the latter- why bog yourself down before going to college. What do I do?

OK, kid - Inks is here to help.  First, quit talking about your pickle - if that's where your mind is going into this relationship, then you're screwed from the start (pun intended).

What grade are you in?  Is this like a junior-senior thing or freshman-sophomore?  Crap like that matters.  If you're heading to college in a couple months, then hey, get some free bananas with your cherry soda--you're Ron Paul!

Now - about reading her signs.  Sorry, kid, but reading a book with a female doesn't necessarily equal love that's meant to be.  If it did, then me and old lady Gladys at the library missed out on some true love about 15 years ago.

And you have to realize, most girls aren't in the game to be polite.  She must at least somewhat be interested in friendship or something.  If a girl is repulsed by you, you'll know it.  There's no such thing as politeness from Jr. High and High school girls.  Politeness is about as rare as an acne-free face in those cesspools of the young degenerate generation.

That being said, as Admiral Ackbar once taught us, if it smells like a duck, and tastes like a duck, it's probably a trap.

As for the college issue... how soon are you to attending such an institution of higher learning?  And you don't necessarily have to be bogged down... if both of you are just interested in some fun companionship before you leave, go for it - but make sure you both realize it's not gonna be a thing that lasts.  Getting into those types of relationships before you're ready leave you emotionally looking like Mason Verger, and the last thing you want is dogs chewing on your face.

So, take everything I said with a grain of salt, throw in some thyme and oregano, and you'll be breathing like an Italian Stallion by tomorrow.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on April 20, 2012, 12:49:20 AM
Threads like this are what make this board the home of the most intelligent and knowledgeable posts on this forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 20, 2012, 05:23:05 AM
Exemption from what?  Are you saying you had relations with the Older Woman?  If so, why would this require or involve an 'exemption'?

And why would we care?

And why are you informing of this two weeks later?

Its taken her that long to pop off from it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on April 22, 2012, 12:50:57 AM
The Apple never falls far from the tree.

Yes, in 2030, Bushie's Kenyan kids will be selling him Kenyaplan health insurance, and hatching plans to leave for a missionary trip to climate change-ravaged Bangladesh.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on April 22, 2012, 11:36:51 AM
Something along the general lines of

[8] - Nicolas Dupont-Aignan (Debout la République)
[2] - Eva Joly (Europe Écologie–Les Verts)
[1] - Jean-Luc Mélenchon (Front de gauche)
[9] - Marine Le Pen (Front National)
[6] - Nathalie Arthaud (Lutte Ouvričre)
[7] - Franēois Bayrou (Mouvement démocrate)
[5] - Phillippe Poutou (Nouveau Parti anticapitaliste)
[3] - Franēois Hollande (Parti socialiste)
[4] - Jacques Cheminade (c'est UFOs que j'aime)
  • - Nicolas Sarkozy (Union pour un Mouvement Populaire)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on April 22, 2012, 05:50:55 PM
People in the northern parts of the United States tend to have an authoritarian streak.

Yes, we have a history of being real slavedrivers there.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on April 22, 2012, 05:55:52 PM
OTOH, blowing a horn for Gerard Kennedy as a "Grits' only hope" at this point is like blowing a horn for Myspace as the be-all and end-all of social media at this point.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on April 22, 2012, 06:43:34 PM
Context needed, from both the thread and general knowledge of forum lore:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on April 22, 2012, 06:44:33 PM
Context needed, from both the thread and general knowledge of forum lore:


I don't get it, and I consider myself a preeminent scholar of Atlas lore.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on April 22, 2012, 06:46:42 PM
It's what krazen says whenever a right-wing politician is leading in a poll or favorability ratings, even if it's a terrible poll or within the margin of error or both.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on April 22, 2012, 08:07:52 PM
Intentional humor, but still humor.  Click for context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on April 23, 2012, 12:13:20 AM
Debateable wether this is funny or not, but I think it is.

You can dance to it and the melody is catchy, but lyrics are only so-so.  82 is a good score for it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on April 23, 2012, 12:33:33 AM
I don't get it, and I consider myself a preeminent scholar of Atlas lore.

Well no, you only think you are, and even then it's only if it's in some way related to you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on April 23, 2012, 12:37:34 AM
Tweed's been around for so long he can't really NOT be, but I think of "Atlas lore" to be much older stuff, like the incidents with Yates, Hawkeye and Joel.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on April 23, 2012, 12:39:30 AM
Tweed was absent for giant gaps of Atlas history that he wasn't in any way relevant for much of it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 23, 2012, 05:15:47 AM
This thread is not bad. This thread is extremely bad. You guys shouldn't feel bad. In fact, you should feel like Larry Craig's wife.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: courts on April 23, 2012, 01:09:28 PM
Has anyone got links to this saga? I need to start reading.

Start here: https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=120859.0

The opebo post on the first page alone is worth it.
Are you an oriental BRTD? If so- you can work to become a "ladyboy" and finally try to consumate your desire of opebo


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on April 23, 2012, 02:33:13 PM
feel free to surf the internet on your analog cars.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 23, 2012, 02:52:46 PM
Has anyone got links to this saga? I need to start reading.

Start here: https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=120859.0

The opebo post on the first page alone is worth it.

Are you an oriental BRTD? If so- you can work to become a "ladyboy" and finally try to consumate your desire of opebo

Classic.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on April 23, 2012, 02:57:04 PM
Tweed was absent for giant gaps of Atlas history that he wasn't in any way relevant for much of it.

Well, Tweed's ego is the only oustanding thing about him. Let his have it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on April 23, 2012, 03:00:27 PM
Mark my word. One day, BRTD will post "should I take a crap?" poll, and would await our verdict.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on April 24, 2012, 04:00:14 AM
There's a place here that lets you do all three at the same time.  Pretty decently priced, as I recall.

Hang on a sec.  Edit: Ok, it's 702-878-7776.  Ask for Brian.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on April 24, 2012, 03:49:00 PM
Are you an oriental BRTD? If so- you can work to become a "ladyboy" and finally try to consumate your desire of opebo


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on April 24, 2012, 11:50:20 PM
Option one, but the difference between that and 0 is pretty damn small.

As for option two, we all know that the scriptwriters aren't going to pull the trigger on Kenya.  The network doesn't think the show enough of a winner to spend that much money on production.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on April 26, 2012, 04:35:43 PM
()

BRTD- the fat behind
The chair- every one else's patience


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 27, 2012, 03:19:25 PM

I don't get it. What's so reprehensible about the National Association of Marlon Brando Look-Alikes? ???


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tpfkaw on April 27, 2012, 03:23:32 PM

I don't get it. What's so reprehensible about the National Association of Marlon Brando Look-Alikes? ???

Recycled South Park joke dude.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 27, 2012, 03:29:42 PM

I don't get it. What's so reprehensible about the National Association of Marlon Brando Look-Alikes? ???

Recycled South Park joke dude.

Ah.  I don't watch that show. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on April 27, 2012, 06:14:45 PM
Making up crazy quotes of Allen West is like making up slutty photos of Lindsay Lohan.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on April 27, 2012, 07:38:40 PM

I don't get it. What's so reprehensible about the National Association of Marlon Brando Look-Alikes? ???

Recycled South Park joke dude.

Ah.  I don't watch that show. :P

Considering what I think of Marlin Brando, that meaning of NAMBLA would actually be worse than the real one.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on April 28, 2012, 12:12:56 AM

In return- I will listen to you. I don't shy away from criticism or debate. I have opponents in this campaign- all of whom I respect. I hope this will be a campaign about ideas and about leadership. Likewise- I respect the man I hope to be my predecessor- President Polnut. However... now is the time for leadership. People say the Fantasy board is dying...when I am President let's see if that is the case. You may not agree with me but I am sure you will LOVE to disagree with me- make me the Reagan to your Tip O'Neill as I've tried to be the Gingrich to Polnut's Clinton. The best government is a government where people of differnt ideologies have to come to the table and negotiate their differences-

an inversion of this lets us in on how banal and platitudinous it is.

I won't listen to you.  I will shy away from criticism and debate.  I do not respect, nor to I accept the legitimacy, of my opponents in this race.  I hope this will be a campaign centered on personalities rather than issues.  I do not respect the President, and think he has failed miserably and should resign.  Now is the time for appeasement and a more general chamelonism.  People claim that the Fantasy board is dying, it is, and this trend is irreversible, regardless of my success or failure in this election.  we are doomed and can only hope to go gracefully.  You may not agree with me, but you must act like you do, lest you be repressed and your opinions censored.  obey and do not think.  The best government is a government which I run and is entirely structured to cater to my whims and desires.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on April 29, 2012, 01:06:58 AM
firefighters - 46%
fire insurance salesmen - 42%
fire alarm maintenance technicians - 56%
people who've recently been fired - 49%
people whose homes have a fireplace - 41%
people with stereotypically flaming mannerisms - 77%
pyromaniacs - 23% (many will write in Ron Paul)



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on April 29, 2012, 05:39:01 PM
I keep my account password in the safety deposit box with strict instructions for its disposition stipulated in my Last-Will-and-Testament.  However I need to know - is the account subject to primogeniture or may I leave it to any of my offspring, pets, or the United Negro College Fund?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on April 29, 2012, 10:37:58 PM
Congrats, Clarence.  You've reached 2005.  You're catching up.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on April 29, 2012, 11:02:37 PM
Going to hell for this.

I can't imagine why FDR would be thinking of people with two good legs.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on April 29, 2012, 11:17:34 PM
Going to hell for this.

I can't imagine why FDR would be thinking of people with two good legs.

It was a bit dry, but I'm glad you liked it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Miles on April 30, 2012, 12:39:42 AM
(1) What is your ideological affiliation? What is your partisan affiliation (if any)?

Conservative voter, Thatcherite inclined.

(2) What TV, print and non-print media do you get your news from?

BBC News, Daily Mail and The Guardian. Political Betting and Polling Report.
If I'm looking for news on US politics, then usually the New York Times, the Washington Post and CNN; British news sources on American politics are dreadful.

(3) What is your religious affiliation and how often do you attend services?

Agnostic, I haven't been to Church in at least two years.

(4) Do you own a gun?

Only a toy plastic gun.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on May 01, 2012, 10:37:13 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 02, 2012, 02:22:38 PM
Awesome.  Now you'll have more time for moderating.  :)



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: k-onmmunist on May 02, 2012, 02:27:34 PM
Wait! We can't stop here! It's Naso County!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on May 02, 2012, 02:53:18 PM

So appropriate that this is the submission that got us to one hundred pages!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: k-onmmunist on May 02, 2012, 02:58:05 PM

I felt we needed to break the 100 mark with a bang! :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on May 02, 2012, 09:06:33 PM
Aaaand banned for impersonating Cincinnatus.

I shall return.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Beet on May 03, 2012, 02:29:03 PM
Oddly enough your writing is not the most painful thing on this page...

Incidentally, if you are capable of adopting such a ludicrous affected style, then you are also capable of learning how to write properly...

That's "ludicrous affected style" to you? Goodness gracious. Excuse me.

dawg, u call that talkin white? dafuq r u smokin booiiii? dont go tellin me how to rite rite. I go talk 2 tweed in da way I wanna talk 2 tweed got that?

but when u have the 4c's rich homebois, the young money, but the bois spitting rimes dont get much money. you have mark zukerbuerg and all that kind of s--t. they got all the jobs. they are all the jobs. when life works like that u dont need the homboys, screw hoffa or labor or the congress- they ain't what's needed and they become broke mofos. back in the ldic days they wuld be livininthe burbs, in the hood and then in the projects, now they got no job and they cant learn cloud computin or whatever the latest s--t is.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on May 03, 2012, 02:31:07 PM
Oddly enough your writing is not the most painful thing on this page...

Incidentally, if you are capable of adopting such a ludicrous affected style, then you are also capable of learning how to write properly...

That's "ludicrous affected style" to you? Goodness gracious. Excuse me.

dawg, u call that talkin white? dafuq r u smokin booiiii? dont go tellin me how to rite rite. I go talk 2 tweed in da way I wanna talk 2 tweed got that?

but when u have the 4c's rich homebois, the young money, but the bois spitting rimes dont get much money. you have mark zukerbuerg and all that kind of s--t. they got all the jobs. they are all the jobs. when life works like that u dont need the homboys, screw hoffa or labor or the congress- they ain't what's needed and they become broke mofos. back in the ldic days they wuld be livininthe burbs, in the hood and then in the projects, now they got no job and they cant learn cloud computin or whatever the latest s--t is.

You just beat me on this one.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on May 03, 2012, 03:04:23 PM
You guys really found that funny? Okay.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on May 03, 2012, 03:08:05 PM
You guys really found that funny? Okay.

I'm glad they did. Part of the idea was to have a poor imitation of writing poorly.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 03, 2012, 07:33:17 PM
But seriously, my writing style seems to be offending people. Really, what am I to do then??

You could start by watching all 5 seasons of The Wire. This will not help you, but it's a great show.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 03, 2012, 07:44:36 PM
OFFICIAL BLACK MORMON VOTEWATCH 2012

Gladys Knight: Obama
Hipster that Joe Republic Knows: Obama
Thurl Bailey: given he did that prayer thing at the 2008 RNC probably Romney
The black Mormon lady running as a Republican against Matheson: certainly Romney
Yeah Samake: Himself (if/when Traoré allows the election to occur)
Alex Boyé: unknown; it will be his first election as a U.S. citizen though

RESULTS: TOO CLOSE TO CALL

ANALYSIS SUGGESTS THAT BLACK MORMONS ARE A KEY SWING DEMOGRAPHIC THIS YEAR


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on May 04, 2012, 01:12:17 PM
Brilliance.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on May 04, 2012, 01:25:18 PM
King- my bed is one of the few things I splurge on...I think I made a topic about that a while back. If you spend 1/3 of your life in bed- might as well make it as comfy as possible...another third I spend on my La-Z-Boy so I splurged on a new one when I moved

If you splurge on your La-Z-Boy I suggest putting down a towel beforehand.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on May 05, 2012, 09:38:48 AM

But did you tell them about the Update thread?  Have you considering printing it all out, and making a bound copy to give to them for Christmas?



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 05, 2012, 11:02:35 AM
First rule: you don't talk about mormonism
second rule: see first rule
except infraction points in this thread


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on May 05, 2012, 11:28:20 AM
Hello Hagrid

nice to meet you

some posters here r crazy becuase I am an independent Democrat who supports Rmney for President.
I have  a own election group with a weekly electoral map @ facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/groups/185054414852195/
with a weekly electoral map of mine-very accurate
for the mid-terms in 2010 I had had only 1 State wrong- WA

I think the numbers for OH and Fl r probably very near  to the truth PA is way off. imo

I would ask why your Facebook page has this album full of bizarre pictures of Hillary Clinton (http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.1113967347815.15613.1785872612), but I suspect that question answers itself.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 05, 2012, 11:49:55 AM
Oh my god I actually have a mutual friend of his on Facebook......


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on May 05, 2012, 11:55:05 AM
Oh my god I actually have a mutual friend of his on Facebook......

Yeah, people from here.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on May 05, 2012, 01:48:49 PM
Oh my god I actually have a mutual friend of his on Facebook......

Yeah, people from here.

Namely you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 05, 2012, 08:36:40 PM
Nooooo I made a typo!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on May 06, 2012, 09:51:40 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on May 06, 2012, 01:05:37 PM
Context:

I read this after reading the article about Chris Christie and Islam.

I didn't think it was possibly for me to hear my brain cells committing suicide.
Wait, King has braincells? ???


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on May 06, 2012, 02:18:59 PM
Context:

I read this after reading the article about Chris Christie and Islam.

I didn't think it was possibly for me to hear my brain cells committing suicide.
Wait, King has braincells? ???

Sometimes I'm not so sure.  Then again, I'm not so sure what my brain cells have to do with a post made by that kid.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on May 06, 2012, 02:20:27 PM
He is your brain cells, personified.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 06, 2012, 02:25:02 PM

Why thank you :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on May 06, 2012, 02:41:46 PM
That's not a compliment. This is King we're talking about.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 06, 2012, 03:03:57 PM

:(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on May 06, 2012, 04:47:20 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on May 06, 2012, 06:06:28 PM
Joe Biden was at a gay couple's house.  He was asked by the couple if he was "comfortable" with their relationship.  He said "absolutely."  How do you possibly extrapolate that

It should have gone something like this...

Q: "Hello, Governor Romney, I'm Jack and this is my partner, Mark.  Are you comfortable with our relationship?"

A: "Mittbot detects issue to be 'homosexual' and 'relationship.'  Your relationship is of no concern.    Data indicates the election is about 'economy.'  Mittbot must only talk of 'economy.'  Homosexuality is not related to 'economy.'  Conversation terminated."

Q: "But governor..."

A: "Apprehension detected.  Loading anecdote for 'gay.'"

Q: "Mitt?"

A:  "I like the movie Hairspray.  Movie studios create jobs.  Hairspray manufacturing creates jobs.  Jobs are good.  Mittbot understands."

Q: "..."

A: "Human anecdote complete. You are welcome. Goodbye."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 06, 2012, 10:56:33 PM
Morden did a good job here.

(though I as a rule disregard special-case.)

I don't like to disregard anything, but I make an exception for special-case, and would never consider making an exception for a special case.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on May 07, 2012, 07:06:17 AM
This "issue" is the filthiest race-baiting I've seen in years, quite frankly.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 07, 2012, 08:19:53 AM
just imagine being him while reading his posts. 
okay, sure

imagine what it must be like to type those things.
whoa... just, whoa

whether he is 'for real' or not is inconsequential.
slow down man...

fuuuuuuck...

gonna go lay down now, that's enough for one night


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on May 07, 2012, 11:22:02 AM
I'm not a huge fan of that post (I think it's aged poorly), but I'm glad you enjoyed it these three years later.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 07, 2012, 01:00:46 PM
a greater sympathy for Tweed and marijuana?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on May 07, 2012, 01:03:06 PM
Finding out who Coburn in 2012 actually was added a whole new angle to it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on May 07, 2012, 01:22:25 PM
Context:

At last we have an answer to that omnipresent net question, "Who is Johan Galtung?"

Keeping in mind the source, this is actually really...I mean, this is surprisingly worthwhile. I actually chuckled for a second or two.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on May 07, 2012, 01:35:27 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on May 07, 2012, 02:59:34 PM
Context:

At last we have an answer to that omnipresent net question, "Who is Johan Galtung?"

Keeping in mind the source, this is actually really...I mean, this is surprisingly worthwhile. I actually chuckled for a second or two.

That is definitely the most worthwhile post he's ever made.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on May 07, 2012, 03:28:43 PM
Since he ran in 2008 without winning a single state, I'd say Utah.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on May 08, 2012, 07:44:39 PM
OK, I looked up their scores (http://www.scaruffi.com/politics/dictat.html), and I would like to change my vote.  I'm happy with my Mao and Stalin votes, but I would like to change my Lenin vote to Breschnev, who apparently did a lot of good works in Afghanistan.  Lenin barely ranks at all.

Kinda made me go 'wat' more than laugh. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on May 08, 2012, 07:54:36 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on May 09, 2012, 05:32:25 PM

Again, probably going to hell for this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 09, 2012, 05:44:27 PM

Again, probably going to hell for this.

I was torn as to whether or not I should post this :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 09, 2012, 06:09:21 PM
I enjoyed this: not original, but well-executed.

Yes, I identify 100% with the communist left.  When Kerry comes to power in a landslide from our rigged and fixed elections you will all be enslaved and forced to turn over all of your money and possessions to us in the name of Soviet American glory.  Then we will force all women to have abortions.  If they're not already pregnant, we'll make them pregnant, and then make them have an abortion.  Religion will be banned and all who practice it will be shot and atheism will be made into the national anti-religion.  Marijuana use will be mandatory and other impoverished countries will be required to send us as many illegal immigrants as possible so we can fill up the nation and have them steal all of your jobs.  Cutting down trees will be punishable by death as will be doing basically anything that doesn't involve sitting around a campfire singing songs of love and happiness.  Actually, campfires will be banned too because they require trees to be killed.  We don't want you to work because we we hate the working class, even though we're also communists who hate big business and rich people.  We hate everyone, especially America and the members of its military.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Alcon on May 09, 2012, 06:18:13 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on May 09, 2012, 07:22:19 PM
Naso expresses his pleasure that he can now marry his life-partner:

When I saw this headline I was jumping for joy!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 09, 2012, 07:31:24 PM
Naso expresses his pleasure that he can now marry his life-partner:

When I saw this headline I was jumping for joy!

Naso supports t3h gay marriagez?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on May 09, 2012, 07:38:04 PM
Naso expresses his pleasure that he can now marry his life-partner:

When I saw this headline I was jumping for joy!

Naso supports t3h gay marriagez?

No, he thinks that it's a gift for the GOP that Obama announced such a thing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 10, 2012, 08:30:12 AM
Happy Birthday, Oakvale! I know you certainly feel honored to share a birthday with Rick!

You know how do depress the others, Phil.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on May 10, 2012, 12:16:56 PM
I come from a country where the election debate moves timeslots due to a cooking show.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on May 10, 2012, 01:38:21 PM
Not sure if serious but just in case:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on May 10, 2012, 03:35:25 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Miles on May 10, 2012, 09:45:15 PM
West is no Grayson, even if some fringe lefties think so. West is a man of the people.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on May 10, 2012, 11:14:46 PM
West is no Grayson, even if some fringe lefties think so. West is a man of the people.

This is accurate. War criminals and rabid misogynists and xenophobes are, technically, 'people'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: courts on May 11, 2012, 05:28:16 AM
Politico's strategy for protecting Romney here is to take this thread in the strangest possible direction so that that's all we can now talk about, and not Mitt Romney assaulting a gay guy in high school.

Between Hagrid's pedophilic teacher and Politico's declaration that this story can't be true because the victim didn't die of AIDS, personally I can't wait for Winfield to get here.
brilliant thread all around though i have to say.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 11, 2012, 08:09:25 AM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 11, 2012, 12:41:50 PM
It's fitting, as I've always thought that Great Britain looks like a scheming villain in profile:


()
()




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on May 12, 2012, 07:41:42 AM
dead0man, describing Atlas:

This kind of place attracts a smarter, more "worldly" kind of person.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on May 12, 2012, 03:43:21 PM

In Canada they move debates for hockey; in Australia they do it for a cooking show. What about other countries?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on May 12, 2012, 06:56:01 PM

In Canada they move debates for hockey; in Australia they do it for a cooking show. What about other countries?

Here they might move them for soccer games.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 12, 2012, 07:16:12 PM
And in America, they move debates for reality TV shows about 16 year olds getting pregnant. Wee!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 12, 2012, 07:24:46 PM
Context:

This thread is an unmittigated disaster.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on May 13, 2012, 06:33:23 AM
Gee whiz, it isn't possible the best place in the world might be outside of Western Europe or North America...

That's what happens when you're a western and northern country and you're not in the west, neither in the north. No one cares if you exist. And You're probably just a Canada without an awful weather, anyway. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 13, 2012, 08:17:16 AM
Tm is the least bad but he had plenty of ridiculous moments.

And a hack for Rick, I am not. I'm an enthusiastic supporter and was proven to be right about my candidate being a factor.

Indeed, and some waitresses like to be called "table technicians".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: batmacumba on May 13, 2012, 09:32:21 AM

In Canada they move debates for hockey; in Australia they do it for a cooking show. What about other countries?

Here they might move them for soccer games.

Football and soap operas. We care about Joe the plumber and Mary the plumber's wife.

Gee whiz, it isn't possible the best place in the world might be outside of Western Europe or North America...

That's what happens when you're a western and northern country and you're not in the west, neither in the north. No one cares if you exist. And You're probably just a Canada without an awful weather, anyway. ;)

My Debut! Thanks for the induction. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 13, 2012, 04:26:48 PM
I guess the Deluge is damaged irretrievably.

No, it's just that the deluge has attained critical mass and is now self-sustaining.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on May 13, 2012, 06:29:52 PM
This also happens right before his birthday that is in 3 weeks fyi.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on May 13, 2012, 07:29:53 PM
I wonder what sort of in-depth analysis Pastor Jackson did to arrive at the precise number of 8-9%.  I'm guessing he consulted his proctologist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CLARENCE 2015! on May 13, 2012, 07:39:54 PM
Lunchtime detention while he writes out 200 times "I will not stab police officers..."
Lunchtime detention while he writes out 200 times "I will not stab police officers..."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 14, 2012, 08:13:36 AM
26 posts and already getting into the Institute:

"010100001010 101010010 1000000111 1110101010" - Mitt Romney


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 14, 2012, 12:29:35 PM
(Pulls cord)

Mom it’s not working!

(Replaces batteries)
(Pulls cord)

“I will be better for gay rights than Ted Kennedy”

Aww mom! I wanted the new Romney. All the kids would laugh at me if I weren't home schooled.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: TheDeadFlagBlues on May 14, 2012, 06:29:46 PM
Hard graft, and hard graft alone, fascist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on May 14, 2012, 10:32:26 PM
BRTD, on Allegri's 'Miserere mei, Deus':

Also I can't understand any of it. It might as well be in the original Latin.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on May 16, 2012, 04:15:15 AM
The Professor keeps being awesome.

I'm skeptical that Obama's leading by that much or by any at all.

Most polls I've seen have had Romney leading(albeit narrowly) or have been a complete tossup.

You mean that one poll conducted by Dartmouth you are using to justify your fairy tale world where this is a tossup election with no lean towards Obama?

I'd type out a a much in-depth response, but I don't have the time or effort to waste on forum posters like you.

You have no response because polls have been consistent about Obama leads in New Hampshire since the bottom dropped out from underneath Romney in January. You try to come off as a reasonable conservative but you're just a hack and I'm calling you out on it.

()

Is this how you prepare your meals? It doesn't seem very efficient. You must be a hillbilly. You should consider taking one of my cooking classes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 16, 2012, 03:43:59 PM
Once you reach 10,000 posts you become immortal.

But only as long as Nym doesn't disagree.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 17, 2012, 02:46:42 PM
Yes, he does look like that dog but it is death-pointable to say so.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on May 17, 2012, 03:17:41 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Psychic Octopus on May 17, 2012, 07:08:10 PM
    A good person, & emblematic of the right kind of attitude.

How so? The whole point of him posting that is to show his superiority to everyone who doesn't fit into that particular box he sets himself. Why else boast of going to be in the 1%? I mean who does that, really?

     I understood his "I am not the 99%" bit to be declaring that he does not feel solidarity with the occupier crowd, not necessarily that he is the 1%. Of course, such subtleties can be difficult to communicate over the internet.

     The way I see it, so many people today suffer from a need for instant gratification & an inability to take responsibility. His lifestyle demonstrates a great deal of self-control and responsibility. I'll admit that his tone is slightly patronizing, but I still find his story to be something intensely admirable.
massa treats me real good! i don't know what all y'all is complaining about


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 17, 2012, 08:11:48 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on May 18, 2012, 09:45:58 AM
By the way, can other posters read my posts of the last week or so, or only me?

No, I can't read any of them. ???


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on May 18, 2012, 01:43:45 PM
By the way, can other posters read my posts of the last week or so, or only me?

No, I can't read any of them. ???

It isn't really funny if you know that Badger is not an ordinary poster, but a moderator, Jas.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 18, 2012, 08:53:11 PM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on May 18, 2012, 11:29:29 PM
For me, it's just a new way to get worked up over data, plus I get the pleasure of having the last word on this discussion until sundown tomorrow.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 19, 2012, 09:34:39 AM
Barack Obama was "probably" born on this planet.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on May 19, 2012, 11:14:44 AM
By the way, can other posters read my posts of the last week or so, or only me?

No, I can't read any of them. ???

It isn't really funny if you know that Badger is not an ordinary poster, but a moderator, Jas.

Lies and damned lies! I was FUNNY dammit!! >:(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on May 19, 2012, 12:45:22 PM
By the way, can other posters read my posts of the last week or so, or only me?

No, I can't read any of them. ???

It isn't really funny if you know that Badger is not an ordinary poster, but a moderator, Jas.

Lies and damned lies! I was FUNNY dammit!! >:(

Oh.. you were funny (intentionally), at least a little bit. I thought he was saying I was funny, unintentionally.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on May 19, 2012, 10:48:24 PM
I've been wondering all my life.

Carrie Underwood rose to fame in 2005, which means that you are seven years old.  That might explain why you posted this thread in the U.S. General Discussion board.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on May 19, 2012, 11:01:40 PM
I've been wondering all my life.

Carrie Underwood rose to fame in 2005, which means that you are seven years old.  That might explain why you posted this thread in the U.S. General Discussion board.

Beat me to it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on May 20, 2012, 12:45:23 AM
I would have joined the British Indian Army on 9/1/39 and collected 100 Nazi scalps by April 1945.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on May 20, 2012, 08:54:25 PM








































































Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 20, 2012, 09:05:13 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on May 20, 2012, 10:10:02 PM
Well, from my initial reaction to reading that, it should have gone in the Sulfur Mine. :P Edit: And I have put it in there. 

Not sure it's much different to certain other posters though, other than putting the names after "RIP".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 21, 2012, 05:16:52 AM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 21, 2012, 08:36:12 AM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 21, 2012, 05:19:56 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

That's somber to you?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on May 21, 2012, 05:32:26 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

That's somber to you?

Wow.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 21, 2012, 05:39:19 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

That's somber to you?

Wow.

?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on May 21, 2012, 06:08:43 PM
It's much funnier with Yakety Sax (or Surfin' Bird).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on May 21, 2012, 06:28:49 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

That's somber to you?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7yp2CCULHA


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 21, 2012, 07:32:50 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

That's somber to you?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7yp2CCULHA

Great now there's ice cream all over my computer


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on May 22, 2012, 05:18:46 AM

Euphemism is potentially death-pointable, R2D2.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on May 22, 2012, 11:45:12 AM

Euphemism is potentially death-pointable, R2D2.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 22, 2012, 02:11:44 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

That's somber to you?

...

My patience is wearing seriously thin with you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on May 22, 2012, 03:40:36 PM
How does mentally retarded black transsexual unicorns with erectional dysfunction vote? Any thoughts?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 22, 2012, 03:55:01 PM
You need some kind of sombre background music while reading through that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STRgG38T6sc

That's much better than what I came up with:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

That's somber to you?

...

My patience is wearing seriously thin with you.

>implying I was serious in the first place


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on May 22, 2012, 08:58:18 PM
Banned for my repeated attempts to sell drugs to the chat.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on May 22, 2012, 10:55:00 PM
In case that OP was too long, here's a condensed version:

Quote from: Krazen
Teachers in California unionized in an attempt to push for better working conditions and reasonable pay, and a halt to program cuts that leave schools without program supplies. This is bad and Chris Christie should punch them.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on May 23, 2012, 12:33:52 AM
Some things dead zero evidently does not think are worth going to: weddings, funerals, graduation ceremonies, most workplaces, most job interviews, operas, fancy restaurants.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on May 23, 2012, 11:50:55 AM
And a note on waistcoats:

A waistcoat with a deep buttoning stance as part of evening attire
()
OPPRESSED DOMESTIC SERVANT
A waistcoat with a high buttoning stance as a part as informal attire
()
ODD BUT COOL IF IT'S VOLUNTARY
A waistcoat with a high buttoning stance as part of evening attire
()
FIRING SQUAD VOLUNTEER

Corrected that for you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 23, 2012, 02:49:06 PM
ONLY a suit jacket and tie? That sounds too informal to me...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on May 23, 2012, 03:31:25 PM
If opebo is banned then I'm leaving this forum forever, and I'm sure there are tens of others who agree with me.

:D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 23, 2012, 03:33:07 PM
If opebo is banned then I'm leaving this forum forever, and I'm sure there are tens of others who agree with me.

:D

lol


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 24, 2012, 09:29:45 AM
Context:

He is someone consumed by hatreds who needs to be freed of them through Jesus Christ.

uh..


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 24, 2012, 02:18:29 PM
How can you "go gay" as a hetero ?

That thought is very weird.

This.  Hence why, no one.

lot of people in denial on this thread


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 24, 2012, 04:05:45 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on May 24, 2012, 04:46:52 PM
Wait, it's a Xerox-run Apple call center?

At least it's not going anywhere as opposed to fly by night operations like Dell.

I will let you in on a little secret.  Jamespol and I have good, hearty laughs when we review the daily update thread.  We talk at least once or twice a week.  Yes, he still reads the forum through this thing called the Guest account and that no one can ban him from.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 24, 2012, 07:37:41 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on May 24, 2012, 08:50:17 PM
Cop: Sir, step away from the grass.
Westman: I'm not finished!
Cop: What the hell is wrong with you? What did this grass do to you? What if I came to your home and stepped on your grass? People like you disgust me. Now, you'll learn how to respect nature.
Westman: (being handcuffed) FASCISM!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on May 25, 2012, 09:33:15 AM
The thought of a 12-year-old Tweed frankly disturbs me.

But here's the thing: he was 37 at the same time!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on May 25, 2012, 09:55:48 AM
Context:

Yeah, I'd rather hide behind the poll...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 25, 2012, 02:45:40 PM
Don't know the exact age anymore, but before I started massdebating. Probably 10 or so.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on May 25, 2012, 07:35:30 PM
Was probably 6- Helen Foster was the girl's name...she later got into drugs and became involved with SDS

I am jealous of your life.
I'm about 5 years away from having to wear Depends every day...I'll trade with you


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on May 25, 2012, 09:13:55 PM
I cannot believe nearly 30% of you have not so much as kissed a girl. I am shocked and appalled at how a significant portion of you have failed something so easily. This is unacceptable. It's time for some tough love. Look at these chumps

Don't know the exact age anymore, but before I started massdebating. Probably 10 or so.

I was already nearly out of college, I was 23 and just a couple months shy of my 24th birthday.  I've only been kissed maybe 3 or 4 times in my entire life.


The first guy lives on the other side of the world and sets his alarm to real early in the morning so he can get up and watch the Republican primaries to see whether Mitt Romney gets 65% or 70% in Oregon. The second guy is 300 pounds and is basically retarded. If they can kiss a girl, why can't some of you?


I don't care if you are 14 months old, that is no excuse.

Never...and I'll be 20 next week.

That's because you're a blue dog. There is a reason why blue dogs are going extinct and it is because they don't reproduce. It's time to decide if you want to be a liberal or conservative. If you choose the liberal path, you can find a loose hippy girl or something at a concert and easily get some action - even if your face looks like meatloaf. Or you can choose to be conservative and get a conservative girl where the sex will be nothing more than missionary through a bedsheet. Either way, it is still a step up from what you have now.


Go abroad. You have a British accent so you can pull the exotic angle.


I told you like a year ago making maps will NOT help you get girls. Did you listen to me? No, no you did not. This is what we're going to do. You are not going to make maps or do anything of the sort for the time being. Instead, you're going to go to a bar, drink some alcohol and mack on the ladies. For the love of God, do NOT talk about how you discovered errors in the local Connecticut dog catcher race. From now on the only "maps" you should be studying is a map of female anatomy.

I'm seventeen and I've never been kissed.  Not ashamed to admit it. :P

What is wrong with Connecticut? Do they not teach you how to kiss in that state?

Next time I see this poll ran, I want "never" under 10%. When 30% of one of my classes are failing, it drags everyone down and reflects bad on all of us.

 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on May 25, 2012, 09:19:22 PM
()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on May 25, 2012, 09:24:07 PM
He's won the forum. No post can ever top that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 25, 2012, 09:25:32 PM
I didn't think it was that super-good


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on May 25, 2012, 10:27:11 PM
I told you like a year ago making maps will NOT help you get girls.

Please, this is nonsense. If making maps doesn't help you get girls you're doing it wrong.

I do hope you're not referring to this creepy iPhone map app that I learned about today:

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on May 26, 2012, 03:32:29 AM
Re: Japanese man cuts off, cooks, and sells his own genitals as meal for „100,000



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Gustaf on May 26, 2012, 04:21:15 AM
I told you like a year ago making maps will NOT help you get girls.

Please, this is nonsense. If making maps doesn't help you get girls you're doing it wrong.

The second to last girl I kissed insisted on having a lengthy discussion about the first round results in the French presidential election. I still think maps are to be avoided though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on May 26, 2012, 08:33:21 AM
I didn't think it was that super-good

You are wrong, wrong, wrong.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 26, 2012, 08:49:38 AM
I didn't think it was that super-good

You are wrong, wrong, wrong.

^^^

I can't believe I wasn't here for the greatest post of all time.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: homelycooking on May 26, 2012, 09:12:09 AM
Oh, no, no, no. Homely just needs to find a girl who'll appreciate his cartographic talents. Someone with whom he can pass the evening cuddled up alongside an atlas.

()

Why the hell is she looking at a topographic map of Cyprus?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on May 26, 2012, 11:06:44 AM
Seriously, Dave should make TheProfessor an admin.

"Post deleted for 10/10 infraction points

Reason: Liking Mitt Romney will not help you get girls"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Vazdul (Formerly Chairman of the Communist Party of Ontario) on May 26, 2012, 12:22:03 PM
Oh, no, no, no. Homely just needs to find a girl who'll appreciate his cartographic talents. Someone with whom he can pass the evening cuddled up alongside an atlas.

()

Why the hell is she looking at a topographic map of Cyprus?

This is exactly the sort of problem that the Professor is trying to fix. Why the hell are you looking at the map instead of the woman?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on May 26, 2012, 12:43:34 PM
Oh, no, no, no. Homely just needs to find a girl who'll appreciate his cartographic talents. Someone with whom he can pass the evening cuddled up alongside an atlas.

()

Why the hell is she looking at a topographic map of Cyprus?

Why the hell does it matter?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on May 26, 2012, 12:50:40 PM
Oh, no, no, no. Homely just needs to find a girl who'll appreciate his cartographic talents. Someone with whom he can pass the evening cuddled up alongside an atlas.

()

Why the hell is she looking at a topographic map of Cyprus?

This is exactly the sort of problem that the Professor is trying to fix. Why the hell are you looking at the map instead of the woman?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on May 27, 2012, 01:12:43 AM
This may be the last post of his I have the honor of posting in this thread, if the rumors are true. I hope that one day, when the moderator regime is no more and this forum is free again, you'll be able to return.

A few new ones from this week with friends

()

Wow.  Where did you find a girl that slim in Ohio?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on May 27, 2012, 03:13:52 AM
This may be the last post of his I have the honor of posting in this thread, if the rumors are true. I hope that one day, when the moderator regime is no more and this forum is free again, you'll be able to return.

opebo isn't banned.  Rather, he's in some sort of mod review purgatory, pending Dave fixing the software, or whatever it is he needs to do break opebo out.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 27, 2012, 08:41:18 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: ○∙◄☻„tπ[╪AV┼cVź└ on May 27, 2012, 06:40:31 PM
If you think the Democrats or anyone who's a part of the two-party system is far-left, you're wrong.

Bernie Sanders?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 27, 2012, 10:34:04 PM
Context:

Maybe he was just homesick for New Jersey.  Trolololololololol


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on May 28, 2012, 06:44:16 PM
Of course. If you look back through history, you'll see that the Mississippians, the Atlanteans, the Pascuense, the Polynesians of the Pitcairn Islands, the people of Malden Island, the Norse of Greenland, and so many other civilizations were destroyed by those two great scourges of man, video games and free porn.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on May 28, 2012, 09:34:29 PM
Of course. If you look back through history, you'll see that the Mississippians, the Atlanteans, the Pascuense, the Polynesians of the Pitcairn Islands, the people of Malden Island, the Norse of Greenland, and so many other civilizations were destroyed by those two great scourges of man, video games and free porn.

I did actually specifically choose those because they actually could have been destroyed by video games and free porn.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on May 29, 2012, 06:20:54 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on May 29, 2012, 09:34:07 AM
Did Tweed just create a sock in order to debate with himself?

That's what I'm thinking...

Perhaps Tweed has multiple (Communist) personalities, and they simply decided to change location. I'd expect the Trotskyist one, the Maoist one, and the Stalinist one to show up shortly; I'd be very interested to see what a Ba'athist Tweed would be as well.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on May 29, 2012, 09:34:10 AM
Did Tweed just create a sock in order to debate with himself?

That's what I'm thinking...

Perhaps Tweed has multiple (Communist) personalities, and they simply decided to change location. I'd expect the Trotskyist one, the Maoist one, and the Stalinist one to show up shortly; I'd be very interested to see what a Ba'athist Tweed would be as well.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 29, 2012, 09:37:27 AM
the kid is from Long Island as well so no location change needed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on May 30, 2012, 01:49:13 PM
No. For example I have no racial prejudices, but I only find white women attractive. So I would like to live in a society in which everyone is white because I will find more women I'm attracted to.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on May 30, 2012, 10:35:24 PM
Well if your Iowa home were located in the place depicted below, where would you want to spend your time?

()

I don't know, "Cumming Tap" sounds like it might be quite a happening place!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on May 31, 2012, 01:47:25 AM
There should be a Self-Parody Goldmine for stuff like this:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on May 31, 2012, 02:22:13 AM
BRTD, you of all people should not be advocating for the creation of a Self-Parody Goldmine...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on May 31, 2012, 04:54:35 AM
BRTD, you of all people should not be advocating for the creation of a Self-Parody Goldmine...

or perhaps, the fact that he is...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 31, 2012, 05:25:57 AM
BRTD, you of all people should not be advocating for the creation of a Self-Parody Goldmine...

This is my submission.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on May 31, 2012, 11:48:54 AM
Michael Bennet would probably be my first choice, too, actually.

Bennet was born in India, sorry.

I think you're forgetting that he is white.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on May 31, 2012, 12:25:55 PM

I thought that's what the Irony Oremine would be for, but it never seems to take off.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on June 01, 2012, 09:40:05 PM
The mod community now has zero credibility left.

click for context.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on June 02, 2012, 12:27:20 PM
how many death points would I get for posting the picture?

all of them, and probably several death threats too.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: courts on June 03, 2012, 02:06:54 PM
i know, posting anything brtd is basically cheating but..

In the program today:

Quote
On Sunday, July 29 we will hold child dedications and baptisms for all the new babies and new believers. If you are interested please sign up in the cafe by Sunday, July 1. If you have questions about baptism please contact this guy at email, or this girl at email for child dedications.

:D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on June 03, 2012, 04:07:31 PM
DC will be more Republican in 2012 than it was in 2008, after all, Romney is well liked by black Americans.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on June 03, 2012, 10:53:21 PM
It was 5 1/2 years for me.

Popular T-shirt at my university: "Graduating in 4 years is like leaving the party at 10 o'clock."

I have a suspicion not leaving the party at 10 o'clock when they really should is a big part of the reason many people don't graduate in 4 years.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 03, 2012, 10:54:46 PM
That belongs in the good post thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on June 04, 2012, 12:20:25 AM
Good luck, Assad!  If at first you don't succeed, I'll slam your head in a car door try, try, try again!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on June 04, 2012, 09:05:36 AM
DC will be more Republican in 2012 than it was in 2008, after all, Romney is well liked by black Americans.

I bet you had a hard time deciding which thread to clip this into, since it fits every category. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on June 04, 2012, 06:52:13 PM
DC will be more Republican in 2012 than it was in 2008, after all, Romney is well liked by black Americans.

I bet you had a hard time deciding which thread to clip this into, since it fits every category. :)

True. I figure Winfield is pretty much just comedy.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on June 05, 2012, 02:31:53 PM
You're probably better off taking my word for it that this is comedy without clicking for context.

German Bight, southeasterly 4 or 5, good occasionally poor.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on June 05, 2012, 10:43:42 PM
For Presidential primaries, Obama is at 100% (what happened to my write-in damn it)

I chuckled.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on June 05, 2012, 11:53:51 PM
Why is it that Barrett is winning the counties Obama lost in '08, and Walker is winning the counties that Obama won in '08?

This web site uses red for Democrats and blue for Republicans.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 06, 2012, 01:46:15 PM
I'm missing the point. I'm African American and I've researched enough of my history to know the influence white america had on the infusion of christianity in the African American community.


My point is there's plenty of democrats especilly in the hispanic and african american communities who are very homophobic

:D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on June 06, 2012, 01:52:05 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 06, 2012, 02:45:40 PM

How is that funny?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 06, 2012, 02:46:39 PM

Latin is a dead language.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on June 06, 2012, 03:25:39 PM

So?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 06, 2012, 03:27:08 PM

Is the funny part speaking it or just knowing it?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 06, 2012, 03:33:33 PM

Speaking it, just because Vatican City is the only country where you'd actually speak it somewhat often.

I'm taking Latin right now.  My teacher said that the way Latin words are "pronounced" today are probably not the way they were pronounced back when it was a common language, so that's why it's primarily taught for reading purposes and generally not for speaking purposes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on June 06, 2012, 03:35:03 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 06, 2012, 03:39:19 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

No offense taken. Scott- are your "c"s hard, like "k"s or soft, like "ch"s?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 06, 2012, 03:44:27 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

No offense taken. Scott- are your "c"s hard, like "k"s or soft, like "ch"s?

Depends on the word.  Mostly hard, though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 06, 2012, 03:46:40 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

No offense taken. Scott- are your "c"s hard, like "k"s or soft, like "ch"s?

Depends on the word.  Mostly hard, though.

Well, of course, I meant in general. Then you're doing it right.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on June 06, 2012, 03:50:02 PM
Please tell me neither of you would pronounce 'Caesar' 'Kaisar'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 06, 2012, 03:52:16 PM
Please tell me neither of you would pronounce 'Caesar' 'Kaisar'.

That's how you're supposed to do it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 06, 2012, 03:55:24 PM
Please tell me neither of you would pronounce 'Caesar' 'Kaisar'.

That's exactly what our Latin teacher told us. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on June 06, 2012, 04:00:10 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on June 06, 2012, 04:02:04 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.

Learning to speak a dead language seems like the very definition of a waste of time, but different strokes...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 06, 2012, 04:03:40 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.

Learning to speak a dead language seems like the very definition of a waste of time, but different strokes...

I'm told it's helpful if you're getting into archaeology, law, medicine, etc.  Other than that, yeah, it's pretty useless.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on June 06, 2012, 04:06:47 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.

What you mean to say is, 'I took Latin in school.' ;)

The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.

Learning to speak a dead language seems like the very definition of a waste of time, but different strokes...

I'm told it's helpful if you're getting into archaeology, law, medicine, etc.  Other than that, yeah, it's pretty useless.

I never take anyone serious who doesn't master at least some latin.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: patrick1 on June 06, 2012, 04:18:50 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.

Learning to speak a dead language seems like the very definition of a waste of time, but different strokes...

I'm told it's helpful if you're getting into archaeology, law, medicine, etc.  Other than that, yeah, it's pretty useless.

I took four years of Latin in HS.  As for practicality, it did help on the verbal section of the SAT's quite a bit. Fifteen years later I haven't really remembered much except for the Ave Maria, Pater Noster and snippets of the Aeneid.

Oh and mea culpa, mea maxima culpa for defiling this hallowed institution.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on June 06, 2012, 04:31:29 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.

Learning to speak a dead language seems like the very definition of a waste of time, but different strokes...

I'd say learning to speak the language spoken by the great civilizations which we are heirs of is a way to keep their legacy alive. :)


The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

I personally have a great admiration for people able to speak dead languages, especially Latin.

What you mean to say is, 'I took Latin in school.' ;)

Yes. I didn't suck at it, nor was I brilliant, but by the time I left high school I couldn't take it anymore. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on June 06, 2012, 06:48:13 PM
I remember that as their April Fool's story one year, NPR reported about an Irish basketball phenomenon that Boston was interested in, but would only agree to sign if the team started pronouncing Celtics as Keltics and not Seltics.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: batmacumba on June 06, 2012, 11:04:08 PM
The idea of someone speaking a dead language, especially, Latin (or even claiming to speak it) is inherently hilarious to me. If you don't find it so I apologise.

No offense taken. Scott- are your "c"s hard, like "k"s or soft, like "ch"s?

Depends on the word.  Mostly hard, though.

Well, of course, I meant in general. Then you're doing it right.

The affrication of /k/'s happened when the language was still alive.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on June 06, 2012, 11:37:18 PM
Well, this has certainly been a hilarious discussion, worthy of this thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: ZuWo on June 07, 2012, 01:48:30 AM
Strictly speaking Latin is not a dead language. It has merely developed into different daughter languages (e.g. French, Spanish, Italian, Portuguese ...).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on June 07, 2012, 02:33:44 AM
After discovering it was on Netflix Watch Instantly, I decided to try watching it last night to see how far I could make it into an episode. I made it only 8 minutes. It was the most repetitive mind-numbing nonsense I've ever seen. What's with Dora talking to the viewer and asking us to say things and all that? And you can stop Swiper just by saying "Swiper no swiping"? What the hell? Then the introduction to the map which was a song that was basically just him singing "I'm a map!" over and over. This is seriously the dumbest and most pointless show EVER. Horrible Cartoon.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on June 07, 2012, 11:22:48 AM
You realize this is a show for children, right?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on June 07, 2012, 05:48:37 PM
You realize this is a show for children, right?

Are you suggesting BRTD is not a child?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on June 08, 2012, 01:26:31 PM
Hilarious in Hindsight?

BRTD and opebo have been around forver and can get away with anything. Same with jmfascist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on June 08, 2012, 01:57:35 PM
Hilarious in Hindsight?

BRTD and opebo have been around forver and can get away with anything. Same with jmfascist.

:(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on June 08, 2012, 05:34:40 PM
Hilarious in Hindsight?

BRTD and opebo have been around forver and can get away with anything. Same with jmfascist.

Quoting yourself is bad. Period.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on June 08, 2012, 06:03:59 PM
One thing I notice is that almost all the Democrats that I meet, don't really fit into the Democratic base at all.

We've noticed that, too.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on June 08, 2012, 09:19:09 PM
I, Keystone Phil, do solemnly affirm that I will faithfully execute the office of Vice President of Atlasia and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the Republic of Atlasia, so help me Dave.


Congrats. :)



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on June 09, 2012, 07:08:27 AM
I, Keystone Phil, do solemnly affirm that I will faithfully execute the office of Vice President of Atlasia and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the Republic of Atlasia, so help me Dave.


Congrats. :)


I don't understand why this is here. Is it meant to be a preview of the iconic Winfield Series?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on June 10, 2012, 08:33:15 AM
I, Keystone Phil, do solemnly affirm that I will faithfully execute the office of Vice President of Atlasia and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the Republic of Atlasia, so help me Dave.


Congrats. :)


I don't understand why this is here. Is it meant to be a preview of the iconic Winfield Series?

It made me chuckle, and yes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: k-onmmunist on June 11, 2012, 03:18:09 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on June 11, 2012, 07:55:19 PM
I prefer this without context:

I'm not sure, but I guess we'll see. He might have brain damage or something after this. He might also be an asshole.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on June 11, 2012, 11:20:10 PM
"Wow! The 2012 campaign is so interesting right now! So much of consequence happening!" - No one


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on June 11, 2012, 11:49:48 PM
$20.00 says it will beat OWN in the ratings.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on June 12, 2012, 11:57:44 AM
BushOK might be called up to star in an Obama ad. "Some say the economy isn't doing well. Some say they can't find a job. Hogwash! I've been able to find a job basically every other month even after being fired countless times!"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on June 14, 2012, 11:55:36 PM
JUNK POLL BUT THAT WISCONSIN RASMUSSEN ONE SURE SEEMS LEGIT TO ME

'Seems legit' is, to be quite honest, one of my favorite bits of Internet jargon ever. True story.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on June 15, 2012, 12:12:59 PM
'Seems legit' is, to be quite honest, one of my favorite bits of Internet jargon ever. True story.
Seems legit.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on June 17, 2012, 02:03:28 AM
Here's what you do. Open your phone, find her number, text her the following:

Quote
u + me = over

Then block her number, delete her from Facebook, and avoid her for the rest of your life.

Then, for girl #2, invite her over or go somewhere private, hang out like you usually do, and when the moment feels right, go for the kiss. If she kisses you back, congratulations! If she doesn't, do one of the following:

1) Run away, block her phone number, delete her from Facebook, and avoid her for the rest of your life.
2) Laugh confidently, change the subject, never talk about it again.

Follow my advice, TO THE T, and you will achieve your goals and find happiness.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on June 17, 2012, 03:05:56 AM
Shouldn't some results be in by now?  It's past 2 in the morning in Greece. 

The election is tomorrow.

Oh.  Lol sorry I'd assumed it would be today (since they normally vote on Sunday in Europe).

They do. Today is Saturday.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 17, 2012, 11:07:49 AM
Everytime I start an advice thread, something from Lief always ends up in the Institute :P

Probably because it's Lief.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on June 17, 2012, 04:04:31 PM
Now I am really upset. 

Lady GaGa is backing Obama.

Now Romney loses the vote of every American who wears purple wigs and wears twelve inch stilettos.

:( 




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on June 17, 2012, 09:24:30 PM
Reminds me of Bush Senior being impressed with the check-out counter scanners back in ancient times.  Men who have never had to buy anything for themselves.

That's an urban myth.

So?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on June 17, 2012, 09:34:54 PM
That could go in the Good Post gallery too. It's an astute point.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 17, 2012, 10:01:10 PM
Come January we may very well witness the spectacle of the Republicans holding the Presidency, Senate, and House, with districts in place entrenching them for a decade. At the state level, Republicans may hold a clear majority of governorships, including Wisconsin, and state legislative chambers including the State Senate in Wisconsin. Conservatives already holding a slight, but persistent, majority on the Supreme Court might further augment their majorities on that and other courts.

I would note that this would only be the de jure nadir of the Democratic party. The de facto nadir of the Democratic party occurred when they made the tactical decision to become the other party of monied interest. The loss of the House, numerous governorships, the Senate, and ultimately, the courts won't be Obama's lasting destructive legacy. That would be his decision to unilaterally destroy the public financing of Presidential elections. That will harm the prospects of Democratic nominees for decades.

All this would be occurring at a time when demographic changes ought to be increasing Democratic performance each and every election.  And, this would be a scant four years after the politically disastrous Presidency of George Walker Bush.  It would seem that some soul searching ought to be in order. Instead, what I fully expect is yet further attempts to move "forward" by advocating even more aggressive censorship of otherwise innocent folks such as Krazen1211 purely based on their having the audacity to offer a dissenting opinion.

Noone seems to be reflecting meaningfully on what just happened in Wisconsin. The left came into the state with their righteous indignation that what Walker had done was beyond the pale and vented their intolerance to anyone whom they could force to listen. In one classic case a school teacher called from work to express her outrage that a service station owner had the audacity to sell gasoline to a known Republican. Both sides had the money to make their case. Surely, the left provided enough manpower. Guess what! The more you vented your intolerance, the more popular Walker became! Middle Wisconsin didn't like the vandalism, the threats, and the symbol of the murderous Black Panthers. Coming down on Krazen1211 isn't going to go over with middle American any better than trying to intimidate gas station owners. The Left has become its own worse enemy.

It was too pathetic to go into the Deluge.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 18, 2012, 01:25:35 PM
My advice is always this- your partner (girlfriend, wife, etc....) should BE your best friend...there were broads all my life who were beautiful, sexy, fun but I wouldn't want to rip one loose in front of them because they'd think I was a pig...
Now that I think about it- that is the advice I have. You're probably too young to be thinking of who will be your life partner but here is a good test- if you can't crack off a fart in front of her, she's not the one


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on June 18, 2012, 02:08:53 PM
I believe in God because I can't imagine what life would be like without Him.

It's largely the same, except you get to sleep in on Sundays.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on June 18, 2012, 05:31:33 PM
...a restaurant where you order off a touch pad - I think it'd be pretty cool. Is that bad of me? Because Mitt's being judged hard for having the same reaction.

The man's every reaction should be judged differently from yours, Tmth, because he isn't the same as you - the rich are different.  The fact that anyone would even consider voting for one shows what is wrong with america.

Actually to be fair I have never been to such a horrific place as a restaurant where you had to order off a computer screen - and I would certainly turn around and walk out of such a vile place if I did, but that doesn't change the fact that Romney's actions can only be judged in light of his overall life of crime.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on June 18, 2012, 09:40:43 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 19, 2012, 10:13:39 AM

This is in the deluge and the institute...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on June 20, 2012, 01:10:47 AM
If Romney-R wins, Manchin(D-WV) might be the Zell Miller of the 2010s.
During the Bush v Gore race. Bush carried GA by a double digit margin and Miller remained neutral.
During the Bush v Kerry race. Bush increased his margin of victory in GA and and Miller went of the deep end.
Manchin could endorse Romney-R in his 2016 re-election campaign, give keynote address at RNC convention and go on Hardball and challenge Chris Matthews to a duel.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: AndrewTX on June 20, 2012, 04:42:21 PM
Bushie isn't white though; he's a Native American.

No, a native Kenyan-American.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: courts on June 20, 2012, 06:00:48 PM
kind of a cheap joke, but also kind of awesome


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 21, 2012, 09:06:29 AM
Context might be necessary

Were you in this video?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on June 22, 2012, 04:58:26 AM

Um, yeah, everything you read from all the mainstream sources are false and you need to think sophisticated about the leaders in charge since they are almost pretty much the same.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 22, 2012, 10:53:22 AM
I HATE YA BROCKA OBAMA. RAWR!-The Alex Jones show.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on June 22, 2012, 04:45:18 PM
"Avigdor, you want I should put up the Moishe Dayan poster here?"

"He wants he should put up the Dayan poster.  Do I have a say in it?  No.  Bibi, I'm using that wall for my massive Israeli flag!  Does Bibi have respect for my personal space?  Of course he doesn't!  He invades it like it was the Gaza Strip!"

"Oh, shush Avigdor.  Where were you when we were fighting in Lebanon?  Relaxing in the USSR with your subsidies, eh?  Vermin Supreme, look at this guy!  He wants that we should not put up the hero Moishe Dayan because he got the extra-large flag!  What sort of schmuck pays twice as much for a twice-as-large flag?"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on June 22, 2012, 05:28:16 PM
Um, this thread is pretty disgusting. ::)

Not the OP, that's a perfectly legitimate criticism of the Jewish, fascist, Jew-state of 1$r@31 - Vermin, I applaud you for raising these issues.

No, I'm talking about Mikado's obscene but entirely predictable defense of the Zionist experiment -


I don't have a problem with Israel murdering Palestinians. In fact, I applaud it.

This is the kind of thing that makes people realise just how awful the Zionist influence on every part of our society truly is - oh, sorry, I forgot that's "anti-Semitic". ::)

Okay, look. It's no secret that the United States has been run by a secret cabal of international financiers, operating in the shadows, ever since Franklin Delano "Roosevelt" (Rosenfeld - look it up!) took office. The hideous crimes of these foreign agitators include the kidnapping of the Lindbergh Baby, the so-called Holocaust, the abolition of the gold standard, and the introduction of New Coke. Since the establishment of the Jew state 1$r@31, these insidious money-men have worked tirelessly, through their control of the mainstream media, to force their politician puppets to defend 1$r@31 against all odds. And of course, anyone who dares to call out these bankers is ignored, dismissed and vilified as an "anti-Semite".

The cabal has even started a rumor that the infamous, leaked Jewish document, The Protocols of the Elders of Zion, is a "hoax". Well, you're all smart people. If it was a "hoax", why is it a book?? ::)


Good luck, Vermin Supreme. You won't find much sympathy from Zionist pawns like Mikado, but there are many of us out there, fighting.

Wake up people!!!!!!!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Fuzzybigfoot on June 23, 2012, 12:56:54 AM
Context:

Well, hey, he was innocent on three. This shows we should never assume the worst about people.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 23, 2012, 11:50:28 AM
How did I ever offend you Franzi and Northeast Represenative Alfred Jones?

Please, call me Alfred. Northeast Representative is my father.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on June 23, 2012, 06:52:16 PM
Aw, yeah! I've been institutionalized!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 24, 2012, 08:32:01 AM
The person who says "Trust me!" almost never merits trust.

"You'll love this cream-puff!", says the used-car salesman who gets a special bonus for selling a used car worth only the value of scrap metal.

"I have no further territorial demands", says the sabre-rattling practitioner of diplomatic bullying.

"We will honor political pluralism, civil liberties, and legal niceties", says the extremist demagogue.

"I am God's gift to women", says the 'gentleman' rapist.

"I want to be your Special Friend", says a child molester.

"This is a special opportunity available only to you", says the swindler.

The next two words are usually "Trust me!" 

This shouldn't be in the deluge.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on June 24, 2012, 12:15:07 PM
Bill Cosby isn't winning? This forum gets more and more racist by the day.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 24, 2012, 08:25:46 PM
President and Vice President:

[1] (w/i) Hey, I haven't voted
[2] (w/i) and this is crazy
[3] (w/i) but here's my ballot
[4] (w/i) so count it, maybe?
[5] (w/i) And all the candidates
[6] (w/i) try to chase me,
[7] (w/i) but here's my ballot
[8] (w/i) so count it maybe?
[6] oakvale/cincinnatus
[7] clarence/yelnoc
[8] napoleon/kalwejt
[9] tweed/bgwah
[10] (w/i) for serious though, this decision was pretty tough
[11] (w/i) I wish I could first preference everyone :(

Senate, IDS:
[1] (w/i) >2012
[2] (w/i) >not voting for NCYankee
[3] (w/i) >implying he won't be Senator for life
[4] (w/i) >ISHYGDDT
[5] (w/i) >costanza.jpg
[6] (w/i) /greentext
[7] NCYankee


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on June 24, 2012, 09:00:53 PM
Is this the first Atlasia post that's made it into the Institute?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 24, 2012, 09:07:48 PM
Is this the first Atlasia post that's made it into the Institute?

Probably not, but it's arguably the best.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on June 25, 2012, 07:33:26 AM
Common-sense solution alert:

Tell me, what is President Romney's plan to rehabilitate black urban areas?
Do they really need  rehabilitation. Couldn't we just give a tax cut to all instead.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on June 25, 2012, 02:45:03 PM
I really don't think context is necessary or relevant.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 25, 2012, 02:50:36 PM
Is this the first Atlasia post that's made it into the Institute?

Almost certainly the first ballot.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on June 26, 2012, 12:02:11 AM
I think they put a (D) next to "Hurricane Katrina" at one point, too.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on June 26, 2012, 03:37:17 AM
I should have posted this here before it was deleted by a moderator who didn't get the reference and thought it was some kind of attack.

He died in a bizarre gardening accident. The authorities said it was one of those things better left unsolved.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on June 26, 2012, 08:05:17 AM
I should have posted this here before it was deleted by a moderator who didn't get the reference and thought it was some kind of attack.

He died in a bizarre gardening accident. The authorities said it was one of those things better left unsolved.

Oh, let us guess who???????


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on June 26, 2012, 03:22:31 PM
If it weren't for Princess Diana dying and The Lion King, many people of my generation wouldn't have known about Elton John.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on June 26, 2012, 05:47:41 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on June 26, 2012, 06:20:58 PM
I'm not sure if he's attacking me or paraphrasing me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 26, 2012, 07:51:38 PM
Max death points in...3...2...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on June 26, 2012, 08:24:27 PM

Thanks bro.

The funniest part about this little parable is that if someone from the outside who didn't know why the characters names were Bushie and Romney read it, they'd think it was biting political satire.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on June 26, 2012, 08:52:27 PM
No. I'm an atheist, and I only pray to a faux-god/human idol.

So you watch TV at dinner?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on June 27, 2012, 07:51:07 AM
Sorry for double posting.

"We shall fight this evil alien invasion till our last breath!"

"I believe we can peacefully coexist with aliens"

"I formally surrender to our new superior masters"

"Wait, I changed my mind"


President Romney evolving on alien issue.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on June 27, 2012, 07:59:29 AM
That doesn't belong here. That belongs in the Good Post Archive.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on June 28, 2012, 04:07:58 PM
Sure, but so could've Germany.

Anyway, at least we can take some solace in the fact that Obama and Casey will win re-election now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 28, 2012, 06:11:47 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on June 29, 2012, 12:50:31 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 29, 2012, 01:19:13 AM

hey mate
[inks] you


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on June 29, 2012, 04:37:10 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on June 29, 2012, 03:26:47 PM
The night is dark and full of turnips.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on June 30, 2012, 11:54:31 AM
Congratulations, Simfan. Clearly, posting on the Atlas won't help you get girls, but will help you get guys.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 30, 2012, 02:34:57 PM
Feel flattered and mention to him how attractive aristocratic white girls are for you. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: ZuWo on June 30, 2012, 02:44:41 PM
Feel flattered and mention to him how attractive aristocratic white girls are for you. ;)

Now it's me who feels flattered! It's my debut in this thread. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on June 30, 2012, 03:44:59 PM
Okay, it will probably be impossible to get out of this situation - if that's what it is - without awkwardness. You should probably sleep with him a few times anyway because you've effectively been leading him on and that's not nice. It's not gay, it's just polite.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on June 30, 2012, 04:20:01 PM
Could hurt Obama in the key swing states of Alabama, Mississippi, and Louisiana.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on June 30, 2012, 07:50:07 PM
I remember my first accidental gay date back in '64. Didn't notice the guy was a flamer, or that he took me out to a bar called the Jungle Snake. I didn't realize why he was rubbing against me until it was too late, and I was being ridden like one of those ponies on top of a bed. I thought he was just practicing for the rodeo. Took me a few whole years to realize that he had ass-f**ked me.

Whenever I hang out with my friends, I consider that a form of a gay date. So yes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on June 30, 2012, 09:51:39 PM
Quote from: hopper, June 25, 1936 at 07:38:44 pm
Quote from: cope1989, June 25, 1936 at 07:20:39 pm
Quote from: hopper, June 25, 1936 at 07:10:00 pm
Quote from: cope1989, June 25, 1936 at 05:55:08 am
Quote from: Mr. Morden, June 25, 1936 at 12:34:02 am
I remember around 1912 or so, the Republicans had won 5 of the last 6 elections, only barely having lost 1892 with a strong third party presence from the Populists.  Everyone was talking about how the Republicans had a lock on the White House.

Also:

Meh, look at wikipedia.


That was right before the Republican party truly spent their electoral majority. They were beginning to lose Catholics and Germans, the West was about to turn away from them in a big way and the McKinley/Roosevelt Democrats were itching to return to the fold. By 1912, Democrats hadn't won an election since 1892 and it was high time for a correction.

Today, Republicans aren't nearly as much of an "our party" as they were in 1912. There was a Republican in the White House less than four years ago. If Republicans don't broaden their base they could encounter the same fate as the Democrats in the 90s and 00s but they're not there yet. Ironically, this helps Roosevelt, as the memory of the last R president still looms large in the minds of voters. In 1912, people had moved past the Cleveland years. In 1936, the Hoover years are still fresh.
No not back then they were starting losing Catholics. The last 8 years is when they damaged themselves with the Catholic community with the 1928 Presidential Campaign. Then the Stock Market Crash came in 1929 I think? Then Roosevelt basically put the GOP in a corner with the Catholic community with his campaigning against Prohibition. Roosevelt did it because Massachusetts was a basically a tie with him and Hoover I believe. The GOP can't blame Roosevelt for the errors in courting the Catholic Vote because all they have is themselves to blame. They had years to warm over people pissed off at Wilson and they failed. Their rhetoric about immigrants is a no-no also. Harry M. Daugherty even told GOP politicians about the importance of the Catholic vote in the future and the GOP politicians just blew it off. Their fault nobody else's.

Not only did the GOP lose the West they gave the Dems every state west of Pennsylvania in 1932.

Wilson got like 65% of Catholics in 1916.
No but the Republicans started to make inroads with the Catholic vote with Harding/Coolidge in the first half of the 1920's

Fascinating.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on July 01, 2012, 10:22:01 AM
I remember my first accidental gay date back in '64. Didn't notice the guy was a flamer, or that he took me out to a bar called the Jungle Snake. I didn't realize why he was rubbing against me until it was too late, and I was being ridden like one of those ponies on top of a bed. I thought he was just practicing for the rodeo. Took me a few whole years to realize that he had ass-f**ked me.

Whenever I hang out with my friends, I consider that a form of a gay date. So yes.

May that topic RIP.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on July 01, 2012, 01:05:26 PM
Typos can be funny:
Right. Because the sensible, are apparently the ones who wants a federal reserve system owned by bakers [...]


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on July 01, 2012, 01:41:16 PM
Typos can be funny:
Right. Because the sensible, are apparently the ones who wants a federal reserve system owned by bakers [...]
Worse things could be fathomed. Heck, worse things have been tried.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on July 01, 2012, 06:11:39 PM
すみません、でも、uselectionatlas.orgは英語のウェブサイトでございます。それに、ゴルフについてのウェブサイトくせに、政治についてのウェブサイトですわよ!

I am laughing so hard right now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: AndrewTX on July 01, 2012, 06:27:25 PM
すみません、でも、uselectionatlas.orgは英語のウェブサイトでございます。それに、ゴルフについてのウェブサイトくせに、政治についてのウェブサイトですわよ!

I am laughing so hard right now.

 I lulzed pretty good when I saw it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 01, 2012, 07:13:56 PM
Typos can be funny:
Right. Because the sensible, are apparently the ones who wants a federal reserve system owned by bakers [...]

lolololol



すみません、でも、uselectionatlas.orgは英語のウェブサイトでございます。それに、ゴルフについてのウェブサイトくせに、政治についてのウェブサイトですわよ!

I am laughing so hard right now.

I laughed pretty hard as well.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 01, 2012, 07:57:07 PM
Americans don't tell UK voters how to vote


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on July 01, 2012, 10:30:31 PM

すみません、でも、uselectionatlas.orgは英語のウェブサイトでございます。それに、ゴルフについてのウェブサイトくせに、政治についてのウェブサイトですわよ!

I am laughing so hard right now.

I laughed pretty hard as well.
It's times like these I wish I could read Japanese.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 02, 2012, 08:49:18 AM
It says:

I'm sorry, but it's uselectionatlas. org is a website of the English. Besides, website about golf habit, is a website about politics I'm!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on July 02, 2012, 10:20:31 AM
If you rearrange the words & use alternate definitions and sometimes guess at what stuff means, it's

Quote from: Google Translate
I'm sorry, but uselectionatlas.org is a website in English. Besides, it's not a website about golf, it's a website about politics.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on July 02, 2012, 11:12:17 PM
If you rearrange the words & use alternate definitions and sometimes guess at what stuff means, it's

Quote from: Google Translate
I'm sorry, but uselectionatlas.org is a website in English. Besides, it's not a website about golf, it's a website about politics.

Yep. My self-translation would be 'I'm sorry, but uselectionatlas.org is an English-language website.' And then exactly what you had for the second sentence.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 03, 2012, 02:00:58 AM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on July 03, 2012, 04:47:17 PM
You can't spell Reince Priebus without RNC PR BS.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on July 03, 2012, 05:26:21 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 03, 2012, 05:49:29 PM
No, the US is not imperialist, and it hasn't been for over a century.

who's this f'ing fool?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on July 03, 2012, 09:13:22 PM
You're using BOB DOLE as an example of a credible Republican?! LOL Bob Dole was, is and will forever be (in my opinion) a liberal (which as a side note is why he lost to Clinton in 96). Of course his ideas are anathema to the Freedom Party.

I find it quite interesting you're using the term Freedom Party to refer to the GOP. Are you a fan of Harry Turtledove? The Southern Victory series is quite well done.

I was actually referring to the Tea Party, but it applies to the GOP too since we're taking over

He doesn't get it...

The Freedom Party was a far-right political party in Harry Turtledove's Southern Victory series of books which espoused right-wing populism, anti-socialism, Confederate nationalism and white supremacy.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 04, 2012, 07:06:44 PM
'Opinion of Freedom Fighter'



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on July 06, 2012, 12:11:04 AM
I went up to Governor Johnson, shook his hand, had him sign a copy of the Constitution I had on me, and spoke to him at length.

Good thing you remembered!  I hate when I leave home each morning and forget to take my copy of the Constitution with me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 06, 2012, 12:15:23 AM

Now I get why it's funny!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 06, 2012, 12:47:14 AM
John Kerry is going to have to go out of his way to be extra flip-floppy when he has those practice debates with Obama.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on July 06, 2012, 12:50:51 PM
The entire discussion. It gets funnier post after post.

BRTD should accept Thor into his heart.  I know accepting the truth of the Norse pantheon has made me a much better person.

It's too late for that - Ragnarok is upon us! We have only a few months. The Mayans predicted it.

Fools! 2038 is when the universe ends according the the UNIX calendar.

UNIX was made by arrogant modern man - I learned not to trust computers to predict the end of the world after I wasted my life savings buying five tons of freeze dried lima beans to prepare for Y2K. The Mayans were ancients who were wise with the wisdom of the ancients. Or aliens. I'm not quite clear on that part.

It was ancient aliens.

Well that makes sense - ancient aliens built pyramids and stuff, modern aliens mutilate cows and anally probe rednecks. It seems their culture has declined just as ours has.

It all started going downhill when they let k'razfrtikgn marry other k'razfrtikgn


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on July 06, 2012, 01:27:32 PM
The entire discussion. It gets funnier post after post.

BRTD should accept Thor into his heart.  I know accepting the truth of the Norse pantheon has made me a much better person.

It's too late for that - Ragnarok is upon us! We have only a few months. The Mayans predicted it.

Fools! 2038 is when the universe ends according the the UNIX calendar.

UNIX was made by arrogant modern man - I learned not to trust computers to predict the end of the world after I wasted my life savings buying five tons of freeze dried lima beans to prepare for Y2K. The Mayans were ancients who were wise with the wisdom of the ancients. Or aliens. I'm not quite clear on that part.

It was ancient aliens.

Well that makes sense - ancient aliens built pyramids and stuff, modern aliens mutilate cows and anally probe rednecks. It seems their culture has declined just as ours has.

It all started going downhill when they let k'razfrtikgn marry other k'razfrtikgn

I was thinking that too - the whole part of that thread is great.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on July 06, 2012, 03:06:31 PM

We are going to destroy them so badly it's not even funny anymore. 5-1 for Austria.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 06, 2012, 09:48:18 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on July 07, 2012, 11:53:24 AM
Will he look for a BMW at a souvenir shop?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on July 07, 2012, 08:52:13 PM

()
The Mideast Gubernatorial: ZuWo v Tmth?
Left: Governor ZuWo (W-KY) announcing his re-election bid
Right: former Vice President Tmthforu94 (MCPR-IN) announcing formation of an exploratory committee




Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 08, 2012, 10:39:05 AM
What if both candidates were caught cheating on their spouses...

with each other


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on July 09, 2012, 03:19:27 PM
Why would people fret over this ppp poll when the far superior pollster Marquette already released a poll recently?

"The far superior pollster Marquette" also showed this:

45% Baldwin, 36% Hovde

What exactly is the logic in accepting half of the poll from the far superior pollster Marquette, but not the other half?

Surely if Hovde can come back against a statewide champion like Thompson he can also easily do so against a Dane county extremist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on July 10, 2012, 02:22:52 PM
Naso is obviously slumming it, but I'll give him points here anyway:

To be honest, the Beach Boys never did much for me. That's saying something, considering I am America.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 12, 2012, 04:53:53 PM
I pinned down a kid in school and forcibly cut his hair because he looked gay.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on July 12, 2012, 08:06:49 PM
The real question is why you're eating Mexican food in Amherst.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 12, 2012, 11:44:16 PM

'Nathan, why do you know what emoviolence is?'
'I'm not entirely clear on what it is but I know that it's a thing because there's a guy on my political forum who's into some of that kind of niche music. Interesting guy. He's a left-wing charismatic Christian from the Midwest.'
'Huh. Hey, can you hand me that trowel?'


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 13, 2012, 03:17:51 AM
On Tim Pawlenty:

I'm sure he'll make an electrifying Secretary of Agriculture though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 13, 2012, 04:59:04 PM
Context:

Thought this needed a change in name.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 13, 2012, 05:26:09 PM
You met at an airport? That's super creepy. I tend to meet people from forums at rest stop bathrooms.

Guys, I think Andrew has multiple personality disorder and one of them is Larry Craig.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 14, 2012, 08:28:51 AM
And Kal....dark socks and shorts?  Printing on a collared shirt?  What are you, European or something?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 14, 2012, 12:08:21 PM
I don't think he was trying to be funny, but I laughed regardless:

Should be mandatory for newborn babes, as it lessens the odds of receiving or transferring an STD.

No. Keep the government's hands off of people's penises.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on July 14, 2012, 12:30:56 PM
I don't think he was trying to be funny, but I laughed regardless:

Should be mandatory for newborn babes, as it lessens the odds of receiving or transferring an STD.

No. Keep the government's hands off of people's penises.

I wanted to post it first!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 14, 2012, 12:32:07 PM
I don't think he was trying to be funny, but I laughed regardless:

Should be mandatory for newborn babes, as it lessens the odds of receiving or transferring an STD.

No. Keep the government's hands off of people's penises.

I wanted to post it first!

;D ;D ;D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on July 14, 2012, 09:22:58 PM
Nay, today is not your day bloodthirsty hounds.

Made me laugh. Apparently today isn't my day.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 17, 2012, 06:22:13 PM
I like Weiner, and I'd be excited to see him rise again. Thrusting back into politics could help repair his image. However, if he were to run for mayor, he may face a stiff challenge from other local politicians. Winning, depending on his opponent, could be a hard job.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 18, 2012, 12:34:29 AM
BRTD is just learning new fascinating things about the world.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on July 19, 2012, 04:30:36 AM
It's my humble belief that this also belongs in the Good Post Gallery, but I don't want to trust in my own righteousness on that issue regarding it.

Would anyone be opposed to returning Arizona to Mexico?
Yes. They're called "the Mexicans".
The Chichano nationalist would have a field day with this one :P
We are, of course, assuming a scenario where the Outer Phoenix Metro Whites* stay in place. Evidently, their deportation back to their points of last non-Arizonan origin would change everything.

*and Payson, Lake Havasu, Prescott etc pp. The rural Mormons may be voring for similar people but I suppose they could be allowed to stay. Heck, deport the rich hippies in Flagstaff and Sedona too while you're at it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on July 19, 2012, 06:52:25 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Miles on July 20, 2012, 10:02:55 AM
'Gave me a  laugh.

Of course. There are still a handful of counties in eastern VA where Obama ran noticeably ahead of their Democratic average. I call them Fairfax, Loudoun, and Prince William.

But what are their real names?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on July 20, 2012, 01:06:58 PM
Referring to the Dark Knight Rises shooting:

Does anyone know what the motive was here?

Some men just want to see the world burn.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 20, 2012, 03:07:55 PM
1922:

Quote from: Scott
Quote from: oakvale
Quote from: Scott
So is adultery legal in Ireland?
Nay, laddie.  Michael Collins'll be stringin' ye up fer that offense.  B'gosh, me neighbor Tim Flannigan's best girl was burned alive as a witch last week, that she was!  Eire's a queer land, that she is begorra.
Ireland sounds so barbaric.  And this is the 20th century?

It's funny, because that's sort of how an IRC conversation went. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 20, 2012, 06:45:44 PM

Uh, yeah. It's not like I prefer to think about masturbating and inserting a sharpie into my rear whilst watching a gay twinkie pornographic film.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on July 20, 2012, 07:53:48 PM
There are about five ways that could be funny. But, dude, I came out months (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=152686.0) ago!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 21, 2012, 10:38:06 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on July 21, 2012, 09:14:28 PM
B for 11, D for 16.

However A and C for 11 and A and B for 16 would not be incorrect.

Hey, could you give us insights into Chinese politics?

Are you interested in Chinese Politics? I am interested in fishing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 21, 2012, 09:24:09 PM
B for 11, D for 16.

However A and C for 11 and A and B for 16 would not be incorrect.

Hey, could you give us insights into Chinese politics?

Are you interested in Chinese Politics? I am interested in fishing.

I was just about to post this. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on July 21, 2012, 10:21:41 PM
I'm not even sure what that was supposed to be.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on July 21, 2012, 11:02:06 PM

It might be an honest statement, a subtle or unsubtle diversion, or something else entirely.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on July 22, 2012, 05:02:47 AM

It might be an honest statement, a (...) diversion, or...
Both. And quite well done.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 22, 2012, 10:03:40 AM
In the next chapter of the BushOk Tales, our friend from Oklahoma finds out his great, great grandfather was a Muslim. As a result, BushOK begins to make his hajj to Mecca.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 23, 2012, 10:47:36 PM
Well for obvious reasons they don't care for blanket primaries. ;D

See context.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Vote UKIP! on July 24, 2012, 01:12:58 PM
Quote from: Comrade Sibboleth about Downton Abbey
Not my cup of camomile (to put it mildly), but I suppose it does function as a comparatively effective pensions programme for well-known character actors.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 24, 2012, 02:09:18 PM
Quote from: Comrade Sibboleth about Downton Abbey
Not my cup of camomile (to put it mildly), but I suppose it does function as a comparatively effective pensions programme for well-known character actors.

Dammne, someone deleted the original thread?  Now we'll never know the context.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 24, 2012, 02:29:01 PM
Quote from: Comrade Sibboleth about Downton Abbey
Not my cup of camomile (to put it mildly), but I suppose it does function as a comparatively effective pensions programme for well-known character actors.

Dammne, someone deleted the original thread?  Now we'll never know the context.

No, Sanders just screwed up the quote coding. (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=156045.msg3362573#msg3362573)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on July 24, 2012, 08:11:30 PM
I know I shouldn't post this here, since jmfcst has learned that The Nym Strikes Back, but ...

Her sexuality is irrelevant. Her achievement as the first American and third overall woman in space is very relevant.

Rest in Peace.

Her sexuality is relevant. We can be heroes too.

People like you are such an inspiration to a new generation.  Congrats on being a lesbian.

Oh jmfcst. Sometimes...just sometimes I miss you.

There's that term...again. 

I take it the meme is sexually erotic in nature and is only understood in the context of this forum, for when I google it, 99% of the links point back to threads on this forum regarding homosexuality or African-American women...

...which makes me wonder why it is being applied to me, for I certainly don’t plan on becoming anyone’s bitch anytime soon.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on July 24, 2012, 10:02:42 PM

An odd place to come out, but congrats dude.

Edit: Just found out you are in fact bi, coulda sworn you were striaght


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 25, 2012, 06:09:56 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 25, 2012, 10:13:27 AM

An odd place to come out, but congrats dude.

Edit: Just found out you are in fact bi, coulda sworn you were striaght

This is the greatest post of all time.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 26, 2012, 04:29:41 PM
Originally thought this was a v0031 thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 26, 2012, 05:04:41 PM
FallenMorgan should be paid by the Israeli government, given that he has likely contributed to making neutral observers more pro-Israeli with his antics as of late.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 26, 2012, 05:51:02 PM
Hi, Stephen, welcome to the forum!  If you want a more metaphorical gut punching experience, I'd recommend reading the 2012 board.  I'd also recommend you PM forum regular Keystone Phil if you're looking for someone in Eastern Pennsylvania to punch you in the gut.  Enjoy your stay!  :)

Sincerely,

The Mikado


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 26, 2012, 06:46:12 PM
Oooh, maybe he'll meet with Lech Walesa and accidentally start attacking unions.

Maybe when he goes to Israel he'll ask Netanyahu to tear down the Western Wall.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Miles on July 27, 2012, 12:54:33 AM
If, you care to participate… in general terms
What was your portion “payment” prior to 2010 Obama Care? 2009’s premiums.
Co-pays; Doctor‘s and drugs.
Coverage’s – did you choose?
What is your payment for 2012? In general terms, where there any changes in co-pays & coverage’s?
The government says you over paid by 2% for the insurance fiscal year; does it add up?
No details; did you get the benefit of services greater than what you and the employer paid in premiums?
Are you participating in a medical savings account?
CareFirst, is that a state/ federal (Obama Care) subsidized nonprofit group or a privately held/investor based company? The letter looks like a standard letter with rate of overpayment being the only variable.
No, I’m not in the insurance business. Depending on your input, curious how this shakes out; if a pool of money has a net at the end of a cycle and, it must return, well… if the next year cycle has a (-) you’ll pay the difference, no later than August 1, correct?


What language is this?
The same one that ObamaCare is written in... Why?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on July 28, 2012, 12:15:16 AM
If I boycotted every business where I disagreed with the political views of those in charge, I might have to kill for my own food.

I really don't care what businesses think, short of "Hey, let's overthrow the republic."

I take it you don't eat at either Burger King or Dairy Queen then.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on July 28, 2012, 01:15:01 AM
Ernest is really a master at jokes like that. Well done.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on July 28, 2012, 06:26:58 AM
It's hard to understand other races and cultures though. Each of us speaks and uses slang of our own ethnicity. For example, I get my hair cut by the black panthers and every time I go, I leave having learned a new set of ibonics. At first I didn't know what kind of place it was but it was by my apartment and I realized it when I walked in. Once they got used to the texture of my hair, I was getting the best haircuts I've ever gotten. It doesn't make sense to me and seems kind of funny but I'm sure they'd feel that way too if they came to my town and got their hair cut by a barber on Main St. It is natural for humans to feel safer and more secure if they do things within their own race, town, country, family, friends, economic class. This is a very big discussion that shouldn't really be taken lightly.

What? What? Ibonics? They taught you Ibo? Can you be our forum's black person?


What? Lol they just speak it and I pick it up. They say things like "dat bitch be chirpin like a pigeon on da roof." Another one of my favorites is " Weez just rappin for a halla minute." I'm not black though and don't think I can keep up wieht their ways.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on July 29, 2012, 09:14:35 PM
But which is the biggest pornsite? 

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149299.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on July 30, 2012, 11:22:16 PM
I had a dream a few nights ago where I was running for President and won based on the forum's advice.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 31, 2012, 01:04:48 AM
In reference to The Hobbit:

What's the big deal here? All the great trilogies have three parts.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on July 31, 2012, 01:57:39 AM
I think that's more absurd than comedic.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on July 31, 2012, 02:30:21 AM
Yes, but I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt that it was intentional.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 31, 2012, 11:08:41 AM
I'd really like to know who this creep is and where he's from.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on July 31, 2012, 01:18:23 PM

Sorry, opebo! Look a little more closely next time. This isn't the Irony Ore Mine.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on July 31, 2012, 03:07:42 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on July 31, 2012, 04:21:59 PM

Sorry, opebo! Look a little more closely next time. This isn't the Irony Ore Mine.

No, buddy, though it is an ironical gem in the sense you imply, I was referring what I took to be Hashemite's little joke - a poster comes on with some heavy homo-erotic thread, and Hashemite wants to know who he is and were he's from.. I took it to be a joke about being in fact intrigued by the lascivious neophyte.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on July 31, 2012, 04:27:18 PM
Such nuances are lost in their mush-brains, opie.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on July 31, 2012, 06:54:58 PM
Did a 14 year old really just call me "son"?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on August 01, 2012, 02:06:31 AM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 01, 2012, 08:28:19 AM
That would be awesome. Just the imagine all the campaign videos we would be able to watch!

()
PAID BY MIKE NASO FOR CONGRESS


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on August 01, 2012, 10:47:34 AM
Who's going to be the first to point out the obvious problem with exit poll data regarding this particular demographic?
hum… it’s not a closet that they are exiting…


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 01, 2012, 12:49:51 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on August 01, 2012, 02:56:26 PM
Who's going to be the first to point out the obvious problem with exit poll data regarding this particular demographic?
hum… it’s not a closet that they are exiting…

Yeah, I came here to put that one.  A little suspicious though that he can suddenly write in normal English when he has an hilarious zinger to share.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 01, 2012, 03:32:47 PM
Wait, what happened to the hoard of browns Torie employs then gets high with? 

Yes, I am very fond of browns, Grumps. They know how to have a good time in general.  :)

I'm sure they are gratified that you are amused...

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on August 01, 2012, 09:11:52 PM

I don't recall actually wishing anything on someone, but hey, that's your own interpretation.

Feel free to reject the graph, though.  It's not the first time you've shot down statistics not in your favor. :)

Oh I shall. Seeing is believing. I thank you for mobilizing the people.

http://washingtonexaminer.com/45-photos-of-insanely-long-lines-for-chick-fil-a-appreciation-day/article/2503792&rct=j&sa=X&ei=M7YZUOf7M7LF0AGM-ICAAw&ved=0CGUQ-AsoATAI&q=chick+fil+a&usg=AFQjCNFtfnr0xnXsn3zIjrOMXoA4Eg84Dg

Photos?  That's all you have?  Meaningless.

I suppose I can understand why you don't like reading the numbers, though.  Math teachers are bad, right?

But really, even if the boycotts were meaningless, what does that say?  I could put a huge swastika sign outside of a McDonalds, and people would still eat there.  People tend to think with their stomachs, not with their values.  And you don't have to drive around much to see that. 

()

So the fact that there's a national 'Stuff Your Face' Day for means of political protest isn't very surprising.

Since when did you start using clarence's image collection?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 02, 2012, 01:27:09 PM
(
)

NYJew - 1 Electoral Vote, 100% of the popular vote.
Snowstalker (deceased) - 0 Electoral Votes, 0% of the popular vote.

Shortly before the election is due to take place, incumbent President BRTD causes a nuclear apocalypse over a diplomatic snafu in which the Chinese premier misquoted some emoviolence lyrics. The entire species was annihilated in the ensuing global thermonuclear Armageddon, except for NYJew, who was in his lead-coated basement putting the finishing touches on a tinfoil yarmulke when the bombs started to fall, and escaped radiation poisoning. He voted and, being the only person in the world, won the election.

While technically winning New York's 29 electoral votes, he could only receive one as no-one else was alive to cast the other 28 Electoral College votes.

This is pretty much the only plausible scenario I could come up with for anyone voting for NYJew.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 02, 2012, 04:57:07 PM
that's the best post of all time, hands down


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: CLARENCE 2015! on August 02, 2012, 10:06:10 PM

I don't recall actually wishing anything on someone, but hey, that's your own interpretation.

Feel free to reject the graph, though.  It's not the first time you've shot down statistics not in your favor. :)

Oh I shall. Seeing is believing. I thank you for mobilizing the people.

http://washingtonexaminer.com/45-photos-of-insanely-long-lines-for-chick-fil-a-appreciation-day/article/2503792&rct=j&sa=X&ei=M7YZUOf7M7LF0AGM-ICAAw&ved=0CGUQ-AsoATAI&q=chick+fil+a&usg=AFQjCNFtfnr0xnXsn3zIjrOMXoA4Eg84Dg

Photos?  That's all you have?  Meaningless.

I suppose I can understand why you don't like reading the numbers, though.  Math teachers are bad, right?

But really, even if the boycotts were meaningless, what does that say?  I could put a huge swastika sign outside of a McDonalds, and people would still eat there.  People tend to think with their stomachs, not with their values.  And you don't have to drive around much to see that. 

()

So the fact that there's a national 'Stuff Your Face' Day for means of political protest isn't very surprising.

Since when did you start using clarence's image collection?
I am very proud of you, Scott!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 03, 2012, 12:16:39 PM
Ernest is on fire.

Quote from: Assemblyman & Queen Mum Inks.LWC
I never said no Republicans were.

And to be fair, the law doesn't ban the predictions from being made. 

Good to know. Maybe in the next election they should use this slogan: "Republicans: not as bad as the Inquisition".

This is nothing close to the Inquisition.

But we know to expect Republicans, nobody expects the Inquisition.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 03, 2012, 03:17:54 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Paul Kemp on August 03, 2012, 07:33:49 PM

Considering Romney's past history with dogs, I'm not certain that vetting is one of his priorities.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 03, 2012, 10:07:59 PM
That's more bumper stickers than even Mitt Romney needs for his cars.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 04, 2012, 07:03:18 PM
Andy Borowitz is having a field day with that:

Jenna Jameson endorses Romney: "He's the only person who's assumed more positions than I have."

Jenna Jameson endorses Romney: "I respect someone who opens their mouth without thinking."

Jenna Jameson on Romney's tenure at Bain Capital: "There's nothing more American than screwing people you don't know for money."

Jenna Jameson's campaign advice to Romney: "When things get hard, suck it up."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 04, 2012, 11:56:27 PM
Uh, language, please?  School kids may read this thread...

[...]

And, yes, school has started for the Oklahoma City School District (August 1).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 05, 2012, 09:14:12 AM
You better hope Obama wins.... Romney would approve your extradition to Thailand to face stalking charges


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 05, 2012, 09:53:03 PM
Context:

I watched Aladdin quite recently and they said this several times. Old Disney movies are cringe-inducingly racist.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on August 06, 2012, 09:28:07 AM
My current running theory is that Obama and Romney are actually the same person.  That one person is the same trickster god Joseph Campbell used to tell stories about.  The god wore a hat that was colored differently on different sides, and walked back and forth through the village and had everybody confused about who he was, and when the villagers came to blows over his real identity and were brought before the judge, the trickster god showed up, laughed at everyone, and confessed, saying: "spreading strife is my greatest joy."  So, I'm hoping for a razor-thin election night, lasting until the wee hours of the morning, leaving everybody mad and exhausted and accusing one another of high treason, and when a winner is finally declared, the concession speech and acceptance speech will actually be the same one event, and the one guy who has played the part of both Romney and Obama, wearing a hat with a corporate logo on one side and a community organizer logo on the other, will saunter up to the podium, point at the audience smartly, and say: "made ya look!"



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 06, 2012, 12:21:18 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=768h3Tz4Qik&feature=related


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SPC on August 06, 2012, 12:49:09 PM
Opebo has grown on me



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: dead0man on August 06, 2012, 02:28:00 PM
I think there is a pill for that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 06, 2012, 02:58:08 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 06, 2012, 05:33:02 PM
So, what will the Romney camp do with all this money ?

Based off past experience, my guess would be: use it to leverage the campaign into record levels of debt, pay themselves some obscenely large salaries, park a ton of of cash in off-shore tax shelters, and then walk away whistling with their hands in the pockets while the campaign crashes and burns behind them before declaring bankruptcy? :D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 06, 2012, 08:17:56 PM
Vice President - Atheist2006 (D-DE)

Secretary of State - t_host1 (O-AR)
Secretary of the Treasury - Wonkish1 (R-WI)
Secretary of Defense - CaDan (?-??)
Attorney General - WhyteRain (?-??)
Secretary of the Interior - BigSkyBob (R-MT)
Secretary of Commerce - Landslide Lyndon/px75 (I-GR)
Secretary of Labor - Krazen (R-PA)
Secretary of Heath and Human Services - TheGlobalizer (I-NM)
Secretary of Housing & Urban Development - milhouse24 (?-??)
Secretary of Transportation - thrillr111 (D-OH)
Secretary of Education - Vermin Supreme (O-AU)
Secretary of Veterans Affairs - ModernBourbon Democrat (L-PL)
Secretary of Homeland Security - nhmagic (R-NH)

Chief of Staff - Politico (?-??)
UN Ambassador - NY Jew - (R-NY)
Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers - Bandit (G-KY)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 07, 2012, 02:09:23 PM
Don't know if it was intentional, but...

Ross Perot and Ron Paul in any election. Regan was the last time I felt good about voting.

Posted by Joe
Supporter of the Presidential Election car Shade campaign on Indiegogo.
Show your support with a car shade!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on August 07, 2012, 04:46:49 PM
Don't know if it was intentional, but...

Ross Perot and Ron Paul in any election. Regan was the last time I felt good about voting.

Posted by Joe
Supporter of the Presidential Election car Shade campaign on Indiegogo.
Show your support with a car shade!

It's looking as if JoeBlow is a spambot.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 07, 2012, 06:48:35 PM
Don't know if it was intentional, but...

Ross Perot and Ron Paul in any election. Regan was the last time I felt good about voting.

Posted by Joe
Supporter of the Presidential Election car Shade campaign on Indiegogo.
Show your support with a car shade!

It's looking as if JoeBlow is a spambot.

Imagine him having an argument with t_host1.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on August 07, 2012, 07:19:06 PM

No reason to be bitter because the London weather has been more suitable for the Winter Olympics than Vancouver's was two years ago.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 07, 2012, 09:48:01 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on August 08, 2012, 07:34:56 AM
The problem with Republicans and Jewish voters is that there are little nuggets of things the two agree on amidst a slew of things they generally do not. It's like having a giant bowl of Lucky Charms. The hearts, stars, horseshoes, clovers and dubloons are Israel. The bland, packing material-like cereal filler is everything else. Mitt can try to waste time digging through to find all the marshmallow bits and put them all in a bowl, but if he eats them, it won't be enough to make a meal out of and he'll probably get diabetes.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 09, 2012, 05:11:47 PM
This will probably be really stupid especially since I can't stand the unfunny fat Greek guy but I'll probably see it.

And I thought we were friends.  :'(

He probably meant px75.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on August 09, 2012, 08:10:46 PM
I don't buy these numbers. Too many Democrats sampled.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Yelnoc on August 09, 2012, 08:12:34 PM
What makes this funny?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on August 09, 2012, 09:47:07 PM

It's a Republican primary..


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 09, 2012, 09:59:34 PM

Wisconsin has an open primary, ham head.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Politico on August 10, 2012, 03:28:38 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Holmes on August 10, 2012, 06:16:49 AM
Can we not suspend reality for 5 seconds so that we can all laugh at the poll-crazed hacks on the site? No? I guess not.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 10, 2012, 07:10:09 AM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on August 10, 2012, 12:02:53 PM
After 5 years here I don't understand how y'all tell each other apart to compile these lists. I still think every Dem poster from Washington State is the same person who I view fondly.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bore on August 10, 2012, 01:44:48 PM
Kind of surprising given it's on the 2012 board, but this thread is great https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=157186.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Fuzzybigfoot on August 10, 2012, 03:48:44 PM
Phil, don't be such a Nancy.  :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SPC on August 10, 2012, 03:52:02 PM
Kind of surprising given it's on the 2012 board, but this thread is great https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=157186.0

Bacon King's post in that thread was sublime.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on August 11, 2012, 05:08:20 PM
No, because he does, indeed, follow the Catholic Church's backwards-ass social morality.

Have you heard the Paul Ryan Personal Dictionary definition of the phrase 'preferential option for the poor'?

No, but I have heard the phrase 'ignorant, socially-unaware, anti-choice, homophobic dipstick'.

Or in other words, Catholic.

You're edgy.

Naturally. One could impale themselves on my state's southern border.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 11, 2012, 06:44:13 PM
That one was good.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 11, 2012, 09:49:46 PM

I take full credit for this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: RI on August 13, 2012, 01:40:59 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 13, 2012, 02:18:18 AM

I don't think he was intentional, though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on August 13, 2012, 08:51:31 PM
Howdy Leip-ers,
I've decided to put together a "circular letter" about wikidemocracy and ask around to see if anyone might want to add to it.  If it gets long enough I'd like to publish it as a book, not to make money, but just to interest future historians about what folks thought about this new form of government circa 2012 C.E.

There's various ways to think about wikidemocracy, but I like to imagine it as a really big wiki and town hall USA legislature,  225 million souls instead of the current 535. 

I'm pasting a copy of the letter I wrote below, if tacking your name on with your response to the letter sounds interesting to you, please send me an e-mail at    settdigger@gmail.com

Thanks for listening!

Robin Wyatt Dunn



----




Dear Folks,

Wikidemocracy in America:  what is it?

There are few forms of direct democracy operational as of August 2012, and they all (the initiative, the referendum, the recall) act as adjuncts to aristocracies. 

Wikidemoracry is the agora, again.  The agora was the marketplace, where Athenian aristocrats circa 400 B.C. hung out and governed.  Wikidemocracy in America would be the agora, again.  A real big agora.  Instead of 535 Congresspeople (100 Senators and 435 Representatives), we’d have about 225 million American citizens over 18, all citizen-legislators, logging on, signing in, drinking their coffee, writin’ them some good laws (and bad ones).

We are comfortable with aristacry for good reason:  it is in our genes.  Biologists tells us our ape cousins have well established hierarchies where some get more food than others, and take others’ food away when they want.  Some theorize this was useful when famine came along:  let the poor die, the rich live, life goes on.

Now we know better, we hope.  Now we know all men and women and transgendered people are created equal, and they have equal opportunities, let us hope, to exercise their God-given talents and pursue happiness.  For whatever reason, let’s just chalk it up to history, democratic institutions are under threat all over this Earth.  Maybe the threat isn’t big!  Maybe it’s just this latent infection that won’t get too bad.  But why not respond to this “mild cold” with a mighty overhaul, why not try a crazy-sounding 21st Century political health spa, the wikidemocracy.

So, a big agora.  Obviously, already unworkable!  Although I’ve never been to Switzerland, just looking at their beautiful democratic processes of gathering 10,000 bodies together to vote in person at special times is charming, and inefficient.

And yet, lest we all become modern hermits and never leave our homes, we clearly need a strong balance between town halls and committed political Internet networks, a system of wikidemocracies.  You could have your local, state, and federal wiki pages.  All waiting for your laws, and your votes.

The advantages:  your children can legislate without getting elected!  You can teach them how to write a law, even how to write a good law.  Then you can argue with your neighbor about it.  You get some skin in the game.  You can’t blame Washington if you’re the government!  Make Lincoln’s famous words come true in reality, not just in spirit.

The disadvantages:  mob rule!  Our ancestors feared it.  The chief bad thing about mobs is when they get angry they get stupid.  This is why we have the Supreme Court, which still today loyally protects the rights of minorities.  In any wikidemocracy where I was a citizen, I would want a strong Supreme Court, just like we got know, to protect against the nasty sides of crowds when they decide to bite someone (gays, blacks, Jews, Commies, whoever it might be).

Mob rule!  Mobs are dirty.  All kinds of colors of people.  We haven’t vetted them in advance.  That one-legged Gypsy next door just had another goddamned baby.  In 18 years that goddamned Gypsy kid will be legislating in a wikidemocracy whether you like it or not.  They, if they’re a citizen, will be able to write and vote on laws in a wiki.

Mob rule!  Wow, there’s a lot of us.  225 million!   Multiply 535 (the current size of our legislature) by about 420,000, and there you’d have it.  So just stop to think:  every one of those 535 people we elected has the power to govern 420,000 people with their pen.  Why did we give them so much power?  The writers of the Constitution knew that historical republics were easily corrupted by foreign gifts, and so wrote down that Congressmen shouldn’t be allowed to receive them.  But how many “gifts” do they get from corporations now?  How many gifts do they have to get just to get re-elected?

And that’s the big gain in a Wiki-D, folks.  No more elections for Congress.  No more representatives.  You represent yourself.

Now remember, there are lots of ways to implement this.  We could have proxies, in at least two forms.  You want to keep your representative?  Okay, fine.  Designate your voting privilges as such on the wiki, put a check mark next to Darrel Issa’s name and select “all votes” or something and you never have to legislate even once.  But Issa, who might once have had a million constituents, might now only have seventeen.  Or he might even have more!  God knows, wikidemocracy is crazy enough, and the American people are crazy enough, maybe Congress would actually shrink!  And everyone would designate Obama their proxy, and he could become Emperor.  Another version of a proxy would be to have a “voting profile” of some kind that you could activate, if you were lazy, and then change later when you wanted.  God knows they’ve written enough lines of code to determine what you like to buy online, we could certainly examine what you like to vote on online.

Another cool structural function of a wikidemocracy was proposed by the Swedes, in the form of tug-of-war voting.  In this system, a bill never really leaves the floor.  You can vote on it forever.  But at some point, it reaches a critical mass (whatever the magical number is) where enough people have voted that it acquires teeth, and it goes over for the President’s signature.  (Do we want to leave the President the veto?  Think of how many laws he’s going to be signing!)

Mob rule!  Chaos, people will say.  I can hear Fox News chanting about it now, declaiming the virtues of nice, sane oligarchies.  Yeah, it’s messy.  But it would let us put our apathy aside.  It wouldn’t let us say “well I voted for the other guy.”  If you’re not legislating, you’re just sitting on your ass.

- -

The Technocrats and the Aristocrats

Even if our Founding Fathers crawled out of their graves tomorrow and gaveled in a New Constitutional Convention tomorrow and we signed it into law the same day, we’d still have rich and poor.  We’d still have educated and uneducated.

Rich people have time on their hands, and money to buy others’ time.  And technocrats have hard-won knowledge of how systems work.  They make government go, they grease those wheels and keep the lights on and keep the mail trucks fueled while our elected politicians glad hand each other and worry about terrorism.  We gonna need those technocrats.  They ain’t goin’ nowhere.

Time is a lot more complicated.  I don’t know why New England states never did manage to agree to have just a few paid days off a year to go to town hall meetings, but they didn’t.  I’m guessing they were just too afraid.  In the old capital/ labor conflict, capital won again.

So we’d need time.  One day off a month, for starters.  Paid out of the U.S. Treasury.  If you’re a hard-core legislator, sure, do it in your free time too, but that one day could be holy, if we wanted it to be.  sh**t, make it two.  Think how much we could change, add to the GNP with our collective spirit, how much we’d invest in the future of our country with those days off.

People are getting used to Wikipedia.  They’re getting used to Facebook.  People like democracy.  There’s a million details to argue over, some vital and some less so, but still before us is the simpler question:  why do it?  And why not?  Smart people remain unconvinced.  So let’s have us a circular letter, in honor of our ancestors.

Sincerely yours,

Robin Wyatt Dunn
Los Angeles, Calif.
August 13, 2012



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 13, 2012, 11:51:26 PM
Why would I disavow you? Ideology ain't nothing but a thought bro. Love is the only ideology I truly subscribe to.

You're really horny aren't you?  I understand. :)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on August 15, 2012, 09:44:29 AM
It does, which is why I believe that the true nature of Satan's right hand man is revealed before election day.

Three-and-a-half years have already passed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 15, 2012, 02:27:26 PM
Unintentional humor:

These liberal "facts" are inaccurate.  Repealing Obamacare would reduce the national debt by 10 trillion dollars and putting G-d back in the classroom would lead to an additional 4 trillion in savings.

Where do you get that from. The Congressional Budget Office says that repealling ObamaCare would actually increase the deficit by a few hundred billions.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 15, 2012, 07:16:51 PM
...most of my high school class stayed in South Carolina for the 4 years because they didn't want to change scenery, but I went to North Carolina...

Wow, so exotic!  Was there a culture shock?  Hard to get used to the food?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on August 16, 2012, 10:10:25 AM
On Renaming the 2012 Election Board:

this thread may violate the Inksian prohibition on discussion of ephebophilia.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 16, 2012, 12:00:30 PM
I don't think Dave should buy the Mikado.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 16, 2012, 12:21:54 PM
Context:

McKayla Maroney would not be the least bit impressed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on August 16, 2012, 02:05:09 PM
Crude, but I laughed.

Quote
But the rich are still defecating, BK! (Capitalism).

So I take it you don't believe in trickle-down economics.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 16, 2012, 02:13:55 PM
As for your ambition for the BushOK loins.. perhaps you set the bar a bridge too far, my friend.  Lets help him get to the point where he can find it, before we advise him to use it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 16, 2012, 02:32:22 PM
But didn't Hegel tell us that thought moves through a cycle of thesis/antithesis/synthesis, where the synthesis takes elements of each of the preceding notions, in something akin to the following manner?  And did not Karl Marx dictate that, in addition to ideas, entire social and economic classes can and do operate in the same fashion, and that that is the base of history?

Thesis: Obnoxious Obama Hacks
Antithesis: Obnoxious Romney Hacks
Synthesis: 2012 Board

Simple dialectical materialism, the science of history.

Beautiful.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on August 16, 2012, 07:16:24 PM
But didn't Hegel tell us that thought moves through a cycle of thesis/antithesis/synthesis, where the synthesis takes elements of each of the preceding notions, in something akin to the following manner?  And did not Karl Marx dictate that, in addition to ideas, entire social and economic classes can and do operate in the same fashion, and that that is the base of history?

Thesis: Obnoxious Obama Hacks
Antithesis: Obnoxious Romney Hacks
Synthesis: 2012 Board

Simple dialectical materialism, the science of history.

Beautiful.

I knew you were going to Goldmine that when I was writing it.  I don't get why some people here say you're impossible to please, you're actually quite predictable.  It just requires writing jokes that go over the heads of 95% of people here.  ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tetro Kornbluth on August 16, 2012, 08:04:09 PM
But didn't Hegel tell us that thought moves through a cycle of thesis/antithesis/synthesis, where the synthesis takes elements of each of the preceding notions, in something akin to the following manner?  And did not Karl Marx dictate that, in addition to ideas, entire social and economic classes can and do operate in the same fashion, and that that is the base of history?

Thesis: Obnoxious Obama Hacks
Antithesis: Obnoxious Romney Hacks
Synthesis: 2012 Board

Simple dialectical materialism, the science of history.

Beautiful.

I knew you were going to Goldmine that when I was writing it.  I don't get why some people here say you're impossible to please, you're actually quite predictable.  It just requires writing jokes that go over the heads of 95% of people here.  ;)

While it's not bad, the problem with it for me is that it assumes that there is an equilibrium between the Obama Hacks and the Romney Hacks. I suspect one viewing of that infamous board - or for that matter US political discourse generally - would dispel any notion of that being the case.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on August 16, 2012, 11:20:59 PM
But didn't Hegel tell us that thought moves through a cycle of thesis/antithesis/synthesis, where the synthesis takes elements of each of the preceding notions, in something akin to the following manner?  And did not Karl Marx dictate that, in addition to ideas, entire social and economic classes can and do operate in the same fashion, and that that is the base of history?

Thesis: Obnoxious Obama Hacks
Antithesis: Obnoxious Romney Hacks
Synthesis: 2012 Board

Simple dialectical materialism, the science of history.

Beautiful.

I knew you were going to Goldmine that when I was writing it.  I don't get why some people here say you're impossible to please, you're actually quite predictable.  It just requires writing jokes that go over the heads of 95% of people here.  ;)

While it's not bad, the problem with it for me is that it assumes that there is an equilibrium between the Obama Hacks and the Romney Hacks. I suspect one viewing of that infamous board - or for that matter US political discourse generally - would dispel any notion of that being the case.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 17, 2012, 10:12:06 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on August 17, 2012, 11:57:39 AM
Everyone, if you see another poster with a very similar writing style to my own posting from one of several IP addresses in Massachusetts or (occasionally) New Jersey, that's my long-lost brother Ethan, the black sheep of our family who lives in the US Virgin Islands.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 17, 2012, 02:16:18 PM
Everyone, if you see another poster with a very similar writing style to my own posting from one of several IP addresses in Massachusetts or (occasionally) New Jersey, that's my long-lost brother Ethan, the black sheep of our family who lives in the US Virgin Islands.

OMFG


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 17, 2012, 04:42:27 PM
Hey, if Tesla was so smart, why wasn't he able to keep Edison from stealing his inventions, eh?  Gullible twit.  Edison showed true American ingenuity by jacking Tesla and making himself rich.  That's the kind of entrepreneureal spirit this country's all about.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 17, 2012, 04:47:28 PM
If anybody wonders why Britain is no longer a world superpower, please refer to comments of the NHS loving liberals/socialists in this thread.

Quote
We don't like one of the cornerstones of our society [decline] being slagged off...

Fixed.

Hmm, I just want to clarify, if I may, but are you inferring that the National Health Service was behind the end of the British Empire?

No, I am stating that NHS is one of the cornerstones of the post-WW II decline. Had Churchill won the election of '45, with Britain never embracing socialism afterward, I am quite confident Britain would be much better off today than it is. To what degree better off is ultimately unknown. I suspect Britain would still be comparable to the superpower it was in the 1910s, for example, albeit to a lesser degree for obvious reasons.

If Britain hadn't adopted the NHS, it would still be a superpower. Too hilarious to be merely absurd.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 17, 2012, 06:02:03 PM

A shame that a similar sounding but etymologically unrelated word gets tarred with the n brush.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on August 17, 2012, 10:03:39 PM
Are there a lot of trolls on this forum?

Yes, and an increasing number of them are all you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 18, 2012, 10:32:45 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on August 18, 2012, 10:57:51 AM

At first, I thought Mikado had posted that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 18, 2012, 01:33:24 PM

Oh he would have if Lewis didn't think of it first ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 18, 2012, 02:15:04 PM
so it was dat summer
man it wuz a fukin bummer
i arrived at da beach
u fuked my best friend Leetch

due 2 dat i left da beech cryin
my car was old, muffler was a-sighin'
everything combined in2 one sullen mood
at dat point i jus put sum Weezy on and played Snood

but thru da days nd months da feelins didnt go away
ya u fuked Leetch and I made sure he had hell 2 pay
but i still missed u nd ur sweet touch
even tho u said that I neva let u speak much

so I set my sights on Dalton, Massachusetts
were u was livin with ur best friend Mark Malusis
fixed up the ol' humvee and started drivin
ten hours from Buffaloe but my tears werent cryin

six hours in im high as hell
snorted some of Big Z's opiates in a water well
cop pulls me over, asks for L & R
I pop that nigga's ass with a cap from afar

still drivin my buzz fadin
hold up a gas station
get sum newports nd gas nd OE
bitch behind the counter was named Chloe

now im angry as hell
chokin on a blunt and sippin OE 'til I can't spell
45 mins till I arive in Dalton
my vision is trippy nd my words are faultin

i get 2 ur door and u step outside
u got dat sexy look of surprise in ur eyes
ask me 2 come in nd i mean business
 all dis sh**t im movin in 4 christmas

u giv me da standard bullsh**t bout how sh**t's changed
i aint sorry dat ur daddy's skull & brains were rearranged
by my .22 dat night at the harbor
after dat sh**t ur family was livin in squalor

im gettin horny so i make first move
u say 'no' but i aint bout to take a clue
at which point u giv up nd i pound that ass
fuk u while we smokin Mark Malusis' grass

dis story's still bein written but i got wut i wanted
u nd me together my guts r getting flaunted
lets run this sh**t, u nd me babygirl
or else im destined 4 a long hard fall.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 18, 2012, 07:11:18 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on August 19, 2012, 02:26:21 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 19, 2012, 09:08:04 PM
Context:

Yeah, take The Mikado's word on that.




I don't get it


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 20, 2012, 12:27:13 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=157794.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Ebowed on August 20, 2012, 07:33:05 AM
I always believed morman have no morals.

This is shameful.

They better not do this to Ronald Reagan.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 20, 2012, 11:22:05 AM
Ask not what would Ronald Reagan do, ask what would Brian Boitano do.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on August 20, 2012, 11:28:14 AM
I always believed morman have no morals.

This is shameful.

They better not do this to Ronald Reagan.

amazing


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 20, 2012, 01:30:23 PM
I find it more bizarre that True Romance and Top Gun were directed by the same person.

RIP to the director of the former.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 20, 2012, 01:46:05 PM
Doesn't the FBI have anything better to do than a probe into naked swimmers? 

Is there anything better to do than probing naked people?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 20, 2012, 02:01:13 PM
I find it more bizarre that True Romance and Top Gun were directed by the same person.

RIP to the director of the former.

Wait, you got this joke, but not the exact same joke Lewis made when he wished happy birthday to WM but not Inks?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on August 20, 2012, 02:56:34 PM
I find it more bizarre that True Romance and Top Gun were directed by the same person.

RIP to the director of the former.

Wait, you got this joke, but not the exact same joke Lewis made when he wished happy birthday to WM but not Inks?

Oh! I get it now. Haha, nice. I thought they were making a joke about Mitty by just calling him Walt.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 20, 2012, 02:58:15 PM
\
Oh! I get it now. Haha, nice. I thought they were making a joke about Mitty by just calling him Walt.

THIS IS WHAT I THOUGHT


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on August 20, 2012, 03:36:10 PM
Yeah, but it has to include Atlas Forum users.

BRTD and the Seven Teabaggers


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Goldwater on August 20, 2012, 05:19:08 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Supersonic on August 20, 2012, 07:44:11 PM
Todd Akin is a steadfast man of conviction, lawfully elected by the good voters of Missouri to represent them in Congress and to be on the ballot for the office of Senate this fall. That a sinister cabal of coastal GOP elites is trying to force this honest man off the ballot and nullify the voice of the people in the process, is sickening and shameful. Congressman Akin loves this country, because it is the only place on God's Earth where a man can freely express his opinion, but apparently the arrogant backstabbers at the NRC and NRSC don't feel the same way.

I liked this. :3


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on August 21, 2012, 05:02:53 AM
I dont know what is going on here but ok

You and I are going to engage in a battle of wits. For you, the steaks could not possibly be higher.

Well yeah, because you nailed them to my roof.  I didn't think it would be such a big deal (if just a little odd), but then a falcon or some type of bird like that came and pecked away at them for like an hour which I also wouldn't really have minded except that before it eventually took off it crapped on my wife's car and apparently that stuff does NOT come off and she had to pay $40 to get the car washed properly.  Not cool, bro.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 21, 2012, 09:23:25 AM
Secretary of Education: t_host1 (O-AR)

Excellent choice! He'll be great at teaching grammar!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 21, 2012, 12:06:34 PM
Joe Republic should be demoderatored.

Why r the people laughing at me? All I want is 2 discuss politic topics and 2 provide interesting writing.

I asked an important political question about an election.

Im asking b4 more mean comments on my activity.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 21, 2012, 12:48:30 PM
Joe has a wife?  Ring-a-ding-ding!

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 21, 2012, 01:10:19 PM
By contrast the Hume Research Group finds a very close race in NC, the Kant Research Group has Obama with a moderate lead, and the Spinoza Research Group reports that in the ultimate reality there is only one candidate.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on August 21, 2012, 02:04:06 PM
Todd Akin is a steadfast man of conviction, lawfully elected by the good voters of Missouri to represent them in Congress and to be on the ballot for the office of Senate this fall. That a sinister cabal of coastal GOP elites is trying to force this honest man off the ballot and nullify the voice of the people in the process, is sickening and shameful. Congressman Akin loves this country, because it is the only place on God's Earth where a man can freely express his opinion, but apparently the arrogant backstabbers at the NRC and NRSC don't feel the same way.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Torie on August 21, 2012, 02:55:20 PM
Todd Akin is a steadfast man of conviction, lawfully elected by the good voters of Missouri to represent them in Congress and to be on the ballot for the office of Senate this fall. That a sinister cabal of coastal GOP elites is trying to force this honest man off the ballot and nullify the voice of the people in the process, is sickening and shameful. Congressman Akin loves this country, because it is the only place on God's Earth where a man can freely express his opinion, but apparently the arrogant backstabbers at the NRC and NRSC don't feel the same way.

Akin is just his Cain substitute of the week for Lief. Lief just hasn't been the same since the Cain express went off the rails, and crashed into a bevy of his female admirers.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: anvi on August 21, 2012, 03:04:00 PM
A polling organization named after Descartes??  What was their method?  To just sit and think about it till they were indubitably certain?  Or maybe they just tried to find the tangent line of all existing polls and discovered an inflection point on the border of North Carolina?

I am rarely handed the opportunity to make a math joke, so I couldn't resist.  Jokes about philosophers, on the other hand, are a dime a dozen. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 22, 2012, 06:28:54 AM
Quote from: They Move on Tracks of Never-Ending Light
that guy who's mentioned in the Jawbreaker song "Boxcar".

This is the best way to refer to Jack Kerouac.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 22, 2012, 10:41:28 AM
Context:

that. Bring me some cookies from Baker Bob.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on August 22, 2012, 11:37:53 AM
I thought this poll was going to be about which of the three I'd most like to try. :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 22, 2012, 07:37:54 PM
Today at 02:24:33 pm
in Re: How big will Obama's...
by Shirtless Voter

Today at 07:56:23 pm
in How big will be Romney's...
by Bane

I'm guessing that Obama's will be bigger...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Hatman 🍁 on August 22, 2012, 11:25:56 PM
Pauline Marois will issue more language-related policies:

1) China-style internet firewall. Instead of blocking politically subversive websites, it will only permit French language websites.

2) Division of Montreal into West Montreal and East Montreal. The West is walled off from all of Quebec, except West Montrealers can use Highways 20 and 40 to travel to Canada.

3) Downtown Montreal will be divided by a concrete wall with armed guards and checkpoints.

4) The Office de la Langue Franēaise will acquire new powers to keep East Montrealers under constant surveillance. They'll also encourage people to report their neighbours, family, and co-workers if they speak English even in private.

5) Anyone who is found to use English will be sent to language camps.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 23, 2012, 01:17:38 PM
Context:

Aw, you two are so cute!  Quite a catch there, lovely girl.

Which girl?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 24, 2012, 11:10:49 AM
I'm a liberal and I will say that this is basically a case of "Gotcha Politics".  Clearly Congressman Akin misspoke.  I'm sure he meant to say something along the lines of "I'm dumb as s***."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 24, 2012, 11:43:39 AM
Anzalone Liszt also found Mazeppa leading Les préludes 47-34, with Orpheus and Hunnenschlacht trailing far behind.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 24, 2012, 09:31:49 PM
Chester Arthur for President: The policies we want. The muttonchops we need.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SPC on August 24, 2012, 11:06:56 PM
Context:

It is all about turnout though.......


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on August 25, 2012, 02:56:05 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 25, 2012, 04:06:04 PM
If Congress can posthumously promote George Washington to a 5-star general, can it also posthumously demote Custer back to private?

Washington was actually promoted to six stars, but I laughed.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on August 25, 2012, 09:26:31 PM
RIP

A reminder that it won't be long before we become a planet with no living moonwalkers.

First Michael Jackson now this...

RIP, but that's what he gets for blood doping.

I hope you are flying with the angels far beyond the travel of our mortal coil to see the face of the God I long to see.

Be at Peace Neil Mission Accomplished


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on August 25, 2012, 09:42:26 PM
A fair guess but unfortunately you didn't come close... I am actually Sir Mix A Lot


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on August 25, 2012, 09:43:22 PM
RIP

A reminder that it won't be long before we become a planet with no living moonwalkers.

First Michael Jackson now this...

This one made me laugh hard (which is quite... unfortunate in these kinds of threads).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 26, 2012, 11:56:20 PM
the bradley effect:

1. now responsible for the statistical margin of error and/or arbitrarily state-specific

2. happens backwards for mexicans


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on August 27, 2012, 01:30:31 AM
If Congress can posthumously promote George Washington to a 5-star general, can it also posthumously demote Custer back to private?

Washington was actually promoted to six stars, but I laughed.

Actually, whether or not General of the Armies is a 6-star or a 5-star rank is a matter of some dispute.  It isn't helped by the fact that the only man ever awarded the rank while living, Pershing, used as his insignia 4 gold stars.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 27, 2012, 08:36:18 AM
If Congress can posthumously promote George Washington to a 5-star general, can it also posthumously demote Custer back to private?

Washington was actually promoted to six stars, but I laughed.

Actually, whether or not General of the Armies is a 6-star or a 5-star rank is a matter of some dispute.  It isn't helped by the fact that the only man ever awarded the rank while living, Pershing, used as his insignia 4 gold stars.

Well, he could have used five silver stars instead, since rank of General of the Army was yet to be created.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on August 27, 2012, 12:04:31 PM
the bradley effect:

1. now responsible for the statistical margin of error and/or arbitrarily state-specific

2. happens backwards for mexicans

That also belongs in the Sulfur Mine and Good Post Gallery.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on August 27, 2012, 10:46:34 PM
Only half-black.

...Is that politically correct to say??? :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 28, 2012, 06:47:21 AM
the bradley effect:

1. now responsible for the statistical margin of error and/or arbitrarily state-specific

2. happens backwards for mexicans

I will confess to actually laughing at that one.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 28, 2012, 08:48:30 AM
Context:

Utah - the nation's biggest consumer of online porn - is now a tossup.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on August 28, 2012, 11:48:33 AM
Incredible, but great news!  Connecticut is in play, and is gonna neutralize a potential Repub loss in Missouri


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on August 28, 2012, 12:45:04 PM
Knowing BushOK, they're probably Cadbury eggs.

(Sorry, I had to...)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on August 28, 2012, 03:59:28 PM
Incredible, but great news!  Connecticut is in play, and is gonna neutralize a potential Repub loss in Missouri

This is a better fit for the Deluge, but I laughed anyway.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 29, 2012, 11:14:18 AM
I hope you got some antidote that saves you from Orange Jersey People's bites.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 29, 2012, 01:28:09 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: morgieb on August 30, 2012, 01:31:45 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on August 30, 2012, 10:48:58 AM
Context:

"Fred Phelps endorses Republican platform, praises Romney for bullying gays at high school".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on August 30, 2012, 04:44:12 PM
If Congress can posthumously promote George Washington to a 5-star general, can it also posthumously demote Custer back to private?

Washington was actually promoted to six stars, but I laughed.

Actually, whether or not General of the Armies is a 6-star or a 5-star rank is a matter of some dispute.  It isn't helped by the fact that the only man ever awarded the rank while living, Pershing, used as his insignia 4 gold stars.

Well, he could have used five silver stars instead, since rank of General of the Army was yet to be created.

He didn't need to use five stars.  The grades of lieutenant general and general were temporary grades and after demobilization completed, there were busted back to their permanent rank of major general.  Indeed, the highest permanent rank a US Army officer holds now is major general, with them being given the grade of lieutenant general or (full) general only while they occupy a position for which that grade is specified, altho unless they really screw up, they'll keep that grade until promoted or retired.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 31, 2012, 10:37:30 AM
Atlasian Evangelical Communion, Atlasian Tea Party, Whig Liberty Caucus,

The Marriage Revenge Initiative is a bill that a an element of liberals is now trying to pass via a citizen initiative. Besides the system of 'socialized' medicine, this is the worst attempt at legislation I've seen in my time of Atlasian service. They seek to fully pervert the whole of our human experience by denying traditional man-woman  marriage it's most noble position. I thought the gay community just wanted "equality". I don't think Harvey Milk would want our society go down this rabbit hole. Only the most radical of libertines (nice phrase. Good work!) would dare come out in support of this abomitible abominable of actions. This bill is an enemy of freedom with the most sinister of intentions. I urge all of conscience and reason to oppose this.

B-

Please refrain from hyperbole and fact check next time. Otherwise good effort!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on August 31, 2012, 11:11:43 AM
Atlasian Evangelical Communion, Atlasian Tea Party, Whig Liberty Caucus,

The Marriage Revenge Initiative is a bill that a an element of liberals is now trying to pass via a citizen initiative. Besides the system of 'socialized' medicine, this is the worst attempt at legislation I've seen in my time of Atlasian service. They seek to fully pervert the whole of our human experience by denying traditional man-woman  marriage it's most noble position. I thought the gay community just wanted "equality". I don't think Harvey Milk would want our society go down this rabbit hole. Only the most radical of libertines (nice phrase. Good work!) would dare come out in support of this abomitible abominable of actions. This bill is an enemy of freedom with the most sinister of intentions. I urge all of conscience and reason to oppose this.

B-

Please refrain from hyperbole and fact check next time. Otherwise good effort!


Damn it Jake you beat me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on August 31, 2012, 12:44:13 PM
I thought it died in a car crash some years ago?

Context required.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 31, 2012, 04:02:59 PM

:D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on August 31, 2012, 04:33:02 PM

So long as we also allow the socialist neoliberals and authoritarian anarchists.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Vazdul (Formerly Chairman of the Communist Party of Ontario) on August 31, 2012, 05:07:19 PM

Critique: The "authoritarian anarchists" bit is redundant, being already covered in the phrase "socially conservative libertarians."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on August 31, 2012, 05:21:57 PM

Critique: The "authoritarian anarchists" bit is redundant, being already covered in the phrase "socially conservative libertarians."

Just taking it to the extreme (libertarian to anarchist, soccon to authoritarian).


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on August 31, 2012, 05:56:43 PM
There's nothing contradictory about a socially conservative libertarian.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Vazdul (Formerly Chairman of the Communist Party of Ontario) on August 31, 2012, 08:03:39 PM

Critique: The "authoritarian anarchists" bit is redundant, being already covered in the phrase "socially conservative libertarians."

Just taking it to the extreme (libertarian to anarchist, soccon to authoritarian).

Yeah, I know. I was just taking a cheap shot at social conservatives and libertarians. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on August 31, 2012, 09:38:10 PM
It's the Lord of the Rings of wars.

How about In Remembrance of Wars Past/In Search of Lost WMDs?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on August 31, 2012, 09:59:42 PM
There's nothing contradictory about a socially conservative libertarian.

Nothing contradictory at all about someone calling themselves part of an ideology that believes in personal freedom as well as one that attempts to ban such personal freedom?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on August 31, 2012, 10:24:35 PM

just like Americans to joke around about such things.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on August 31, 2012, 11:17:44 PM
There's nothing contradictory about a socially conservative libertarian.

Nothing contradictory at all about someone calling themselves part of an ideology that believes in personal freedom as well as one that attempts to ban such personal freedom?
Depending on how it's defined, social conservatism doesn't necessarily involve banning things.
Now, back to the funny . . .


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 01, 2012, 07:44:38 AM
Context is crucial:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 01, 2012, 10:50:02 AM
There's nothing contradictory about a socially conservative libertarian.

Nothing contradictory at all about someone calling themselves part of an ideology that believes in personal freedom as well as one that attempts to ban such personal freedom?

You can be personally very socially conservative without believing that government should enforce those personal beliefs on others.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on September 01, 2012, 10:58:35 AM
There's nothing contradictory about a socially conservative libertarian.

Nothing contradictory at all about someone calling themselves part of an ideology that believes in personal freedom as well as one that attempts to ban such personal freedom?

You can be personally very socially conservative without believing that government should enforce those personal beliefs on others.

It was originally in reference to Pingvin...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 01, 2012, 10:19:58 PM
Yeah Pingvin's initial statement implying he's any type of libertarian, even a supposed socially conservative one is the most absurd and actually quite funny thing about that statement.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 02, 2012, 02:37:39 AM

So long as you are pro-civil liberties, etc., anti-wiretap, and the like, you are welcome to join!  :)
I'm a social conservative on abortion, marriage, drugs. I strongly oppose wiretapping and any kind of cenorship. Can I join?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 02, 2012, 01:21:50 PM
Context:

Pretty low. He clearly had a degree of talent, but never really applied it and instead just churned out the usual uninspired society portraits and the like.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 03, 2012, 09:38:55 AM
Do you think Ron Paul is capable of running as an independent candidate?

Ron Paul is capable of leaping tall buildings in a single bound, halting a powerful locomotive, and outrunning a speeding bullet.  Of course he is capable of running as an independent candidate.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on September 03, 2012, 03:51:20 PM

[One that doesn't want to] end all foreign policy. Or literally abolish half of the federal government.

Paulites are historical revisionists. They have to be, considering that their ideology was proven not to work nearly a century ago.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on September 03, 2012, 08:14:05 PM
Why are we squabbling over grammar? 

It's the 2012 board. Count your blessings.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 03, 2012, 08:48:59 PM
The wife is not a registered voter.  She won't vote.  The boy is 7.  If he could vote, he'd be voting for more TV, a later bedtime, and violent video games.  There's also a hermit crab who lives here named Mister Frederickson.  We bought him at Petsmart about a month ago for my son.  He came with a two-week warranty.  He has outlived his warranty by at least 15 days.  To my knowledge he is fairly apolitical as well.  All of which means that 100% of my immediate family will vote for Mitt Romney.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SPC on September 04, 2012, 12:17:00 PM
Not so much the content of the quote, more the fact that he is trying to sell Romney by saying he would be the same as Obama.

Also, Obama's foreign policy still suits me, and some of his domestic agenda does.

I've yet to meet anyone who can seriously tell me that Obama and Romney would have different foreign policies. (http://www.foreignpolicy.com/articles/2012/05/23/barack_oromney\)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SPC on September 04, 2012, 12:41:48 PM
Problem with Gary is that he's kind of effeminate and that could alienate the paulist vote.

yes, after all, Dr. Paul's machismo is a major draw for his supporters.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 04, 2012, 01:16:57 PM
well Williams made no mention of his support for Romney so let's put him down as "persuadable"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on September 04, 2012, 04:23:22 PM

Yes, people will warm to Romney's speech some time around October of 2074, when the revisionist historians have their chance to truly examine what it really meant for people living in the year 2012.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 04, 2012, 07:09:23 PM
These ladies need to cut it out with the botox. Jesus Christ.

I'm getting really tired of your War on Women, Lief.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 04, 2012, 10:33:43 PM
To be fair, black people LOVE twitter.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 05, 2012, 01:25:30 AM
Ok, my friends and I were watching C-Span and were playing a drinking game with Michelle's speech. Whenever they showed a white guy in the crowd (or a woman with a flamboyant hat) we drank. We much more after 1 minute of the prayer then during the whole speech.

You're not going to last a minute on any drinking game if the target is "showing a white guy on TV."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 05, 2012, 01:27:28 AM
Instagram crashed...maybe do to the DNC?

More likely due to an overload of Labor Day BBQ leftovers pictures.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 05, 2012, 03:51:16 AM
It's nothing compared to that D-WA guy talking to himself in the Washington megathread


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 05, 2012, 10:57:59 PM
Stupid, but I laughed anyway:

Clint Eastwood's chair, which will have a conversation with an invisible Clint Eastwood.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on September 06, 2012, 12:59:51 PM
So you're living in Layton now? This is crazy - I literally have a brother who lives in Layton. I'll be sure to warn them of your arrival. ;)

One more fat guy bevy-ing up to the food-bar at the Ryan's steak-house more or less isn't going to make any difference.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 06, 2012, 01:24:44 PM
- James Delingpole, climate change denying right-wing journalist, standing as an Independent campaigning against wind farms.  I'm not sure I see the point of the OMRLP candidacy any more.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 06, 2012, 01:47:43 PM
Throw money at the problem, like he always has.

Crush Obama in the debates. Or at least try to.

Even better, throw money at "the problem" during the debates. I could easily see Mitt getting all flustered and then proceed to pull out $100 bills, fold them into paper airplanes and toss them at the President.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 後援会 on September 06, 2012, 05:26:06 PM
Roscoe Bartlett has a PhD from the University of Maryland...

I wouldn't be surprised to learn that Bartlett actually founded the University of Maryland.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 06, 2012, 05:27:05 PM
Very good speech.

I stumbled upon it.  I'd been watching Monster's Ball on IFC.  Excellent sex scenes between Billy Bob Thornton and Halle Barry.  During a commercial I switched it to channel 27, CNN, and I saw a montage of Bill Clinton moments.  I realized that he was about to speak.  On the one hand, I thought, "Aw, man.  If I start watching this now, I'm gonna be sucked in for at least an hour.  If there's one thing Clinton is known for, it's looooong speeches."  On the other hand, I thought, "Well, if there's a second thing he's known for, it's good speeches."  So I got myself a stiff drink, sat in the recliner, and watched it.  In toto.  Well, except the two times I needed to pee.  Yes, it was that long.  I peed twice.

Nevertheless, it was a damned good speech.  Humorous yet serious.  He has such an endearing hillbilly act, even as he has a command of facts and figures.  If anyone actually watches this stuff, I have to imagine that they're questioning the Romney vision by now.  It was powerful stuff.

Overall, I'll have to give it a 10.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 06, 2012, 06:02:40 PM
Context:

I'm just kind of surprised Mitt Romney of all people could elicit such a strong reaction from anyone.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on September 06, 2012, 06:51:56 PM
AmericanNation is secretly Joe Pesci.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on September 07, 2012, 01:31:54 AM
I like the Bain line.  Might give you the biggest profits but it's no way to run a country. 
Yes, that was a good line. I only wonder where Biden stole it from.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on September 07, 2012, 09:59:17 AM
Context necessary



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 07, 2012, 01:08:14 PM
There is something horribly wrong with an education system which leds people to think this, its the equivalent of 50% of americans coming out of maths thinking 2+2=5.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 07, 2012, 04:29:18 PM
Evolution is a total scam. Everyone knows that a Pikachu with a held light ball is far more effective than a equally-leveled Raichu with equal EV and IVs. It's just another cheap marketing ploy from the sagging evolution stone industry.

Raichu's base stats are higher though...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 07, 2012, 04:58:14 PM
Evolution is a total scam. Everyone knows that a Pikachu with a held light ball is far more effective than a equally-leveled Raichu with equal EV and IVs. It's just another cheap marketing ploy from the sagging evolution stone industry.

Raichu's base stats are higher though...

omFG


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 07, 2012, 07:07:58 PM
It got better:

Evolution is a total scam. Everyone knows that a Pikachu with a held light ball is far more effective than a equally-leveled Raichu with equal EV and IVs. It's just another cheap marketing ploy from the sagging evolution stone industry.

Raichu's base stats are higher though...

Alright, whatever Lt. Surge. Yeah, maybe without held items, but with max EVs, Pikachu becomes the dominant electric type in the UU tier of the competitive Pokemon battling scene. A Pikachu with a held light ball even hits harder than a Raichu holding a zap plate. Stop shilling for the big evolution stone corporations. It's all a scam, man.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 後援会 on September 07, 2012, 07:38:50 PM

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 07, 2012, 08:47:37 PM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=158816

Haha.  Oh, Bacon King.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 07, 2012, 09:46:57 PM
where did a lower class guy like your learn a double Windsor?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 07, 2012, 09:49:06 PM

What a great gif


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SPC on September 08, 2012, 12:02:06 PM
If Mod edits are eligible, then I think this applies:

After the successful DNC - probably the most successful party convention in 50 years - everyone I know who was on the fence is supporting our President because they believe in moving forward, not back.


Friendly Mod Edit: It's really cool that you're super excited about the DNC, but it'd probably be a good idea to calm down the hyperbole a bit. Also, just some advice, it's probably not a good idea to use so many campaign speech platitudes when you post here because most people probably aren't going to take you seriously. Nothing personal, of course, just offering some constructive criticism.

If that really is more of your thing, though, I'd suggest creating your own homemade Obama ads and uploading them to Youtube. Maybe give them a misleading title like "YOU WON'T BELIEVE JUSTIN BIEBER DID THIS ON STAGE" to ensure a wider (and more impressionable) viewing audience. Not saying you should, of course, just brainstorming here with ya. If you do, feel free to send me a PM and I'd love to assist! Also, congrats on the thousand posts.

-BK


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 08, 2012, 12:23:31 PM
If Mod edits are eligible, then I think this applies:

After the successful DNC - probably the most successful party convention in 50 years - everyone I know who was on the fence is supporting our President because they believe in moving forward, not back.


Friendly Mod Edit: It's really cool that you're super excited about the DNC, but it'd probably be a good idea to calm down the hyperbole a bit. Also, just some advice, it's probably not a good idea to use so many campaign speech platitudes when you post here because most people probably aren't going to take you seriously. Nothing personal, of course, just offering some constructive criticism.

If that really is more of your thing, though, I'd suggest creating your own homemade Obama ads and uploading them to Youtube. Maybe give them a misleading title like "YOU WON'T BELIEVE JUSTIN BIEBER DID THIS ON STAGE" to ensure a wider (and more impressionable) viewing audience. Not saying you should, of course, just brainstorming here with ya. If you do, feel free to send me a PM and I'd love to assist! Also, congrats on the thousand posts.

-BK

BK really is one of my top 15 favourite posters on this site


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on September 08, 2012, 11:30:08 PM
This is the most tragic thing to happen in Verona since those two star-crossed lovers killed themselves in a tragic misunderstanding.

Also, favourite? You've joined the honourable side, Jake!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 09, 2012, 12:28:30 AM
This is the most tragic thing to happen in Verona since those two star-crossed lovers killed themselves in a tragic misunderstanding.

Also, favourite? You've joined the honourable side, Jake!

I've always used the Anglican spelling of words!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 09, 2012, 12:41:45 AM
I'm not sure they'll show up, because whenever I try to put a picture on here, it shows up with a broken link symbol.  But I'll try:

Dude the reason they're showing up as broken is because the links you are posting are from pictures on your computer and thus are only visible by you. You have to use a url from a website. Like this:

Jenny:

()

Lynn:

()

My vote is for the human.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on September 09, 2012, 01:15:37 AM
This is the most tragic thing to happen in Verona since those two star-crossed lovers killed themselves in a tragic misunderstanding.

Also, favourite? You've joined the honourable side, Jake!

I've always used the Anglican spelling of words!

Fun fact: I consistently use British spellings except in my academic work and on this forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 09, 2012, 08:26:44 AM
This is the most tragic thing to happen in Verona since those two star-crossed lovers killed themselves in a tragic misunderstanding.

Also, favourite? You've joined the honourable side, Jake!

I've always used the Anglican spelling of words!

Fun fact: I consistently use British spellings except in my academic work and on this forum.

I use them in my academic work and have never been confronted for it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on September 09, 2012, 11:08:31 AM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 09, 2012, 01:12:43 PM
Obama's speech was not the highlight of the convention. Maybe this is why he choked?

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 09, 2012, 03:21:30 PM
Well, the Great Adventure lasted about 3 weeks.  Jesus Christ, Superstar is apparently what he learned.  There was a drawing of a stick figure guy with long hair climbing a burning building.  I think I mentioned that.  I asked what he drew at the Great Adventure and he said it was Jesus.  Jesus was capable of "saving" people, you see, and I guess in the boy's mind "saving" people was something like being big enough to climb the outside of a burning building and reach in there and fetch them out.  One day I suppose he'll watch King Kong and think of Jesus.  And he'll wonder why the helicopters are shooting at him for saving Faye Ray. 

Anyway, I guess I never much though about crucifixion till I read the post that you can't do it to yourself.  I figured on being a smart-alek about it, then after I typed all that it occurred to me to Google "suicide by crucifixion."  I really didn't think it'd turn anything up.  The internet is great, ain't it?
 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on September 09, 2012, 06:36:33 PM
I see Nathan isn't in on the plan yet. Probably just as well.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 10, 2012, 06:29:55 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on September 10, 2012, 11:19:48 AM
In an election or a "Who's a real Jew" authenticity contest?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on September 10, 2012, 01:44:05 PM
Democrat: I'm better off now than I was four years ago.

Republican: You're crazy! Look at how many people are out of work! Look at the deficit!

Democrat: But the Dow and the S&P 500 have gone up. American companies are making record profits.

Republican: You're so out of touch! That means nothing to real Americans on Main Street!

Democrat: So you're finally admitting trickle-down economics doesn't work?



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 11, 2012, 10:47:10 AM
The one that's not a poorly-disguised Twilight fanfic.
No such option in this poll.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on September 12, 2012, 06:49:22 AM
PPP, AZ -- Romney up 9%. I didn't realize that the Arizona electorate was that elderly and white. Possible D pickup -- if it is a Dodge or very old Datsun vehicle.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 12, 2012, 04:25:36 PM
I think it's time to re-angle the campaign.  Paul Ryan for Vice President: One Heartbeat To A Brighter Tomorrow.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 12, 2012, 06:32:05 PM
Context please.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Marokai Backbeat on September 12, 2012, 06:48:25 PM
Good old Wilson Perkins Allen Opinion Research, you always know their numbers are right.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 12, 2012, 08:47:54 PM
Is displaying your sock a covert endorsement of certain practices banned on Atlas?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SPC on September 12, 2012, 11:54:40 PM
I've just seen a tweet that sums Romney's situation right up. His campaign's so dead that he's got the baptism booked for next week.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 13, 2012, 08:08:24 AM
Offensive. I hope he gets infracted due to blatant racism.

Racism against whom?

Your people. ;)

You're an Uncle Tom, so you probably wouldn't get it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 13, 2012, 12:20:53 PM
I don't even know who that big-boobed woman is, but apparently Naso gives a big deal about her.

Here you go, TB: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nicole_Polizzi

Nice going, Einstein. You've destroyed the last innocent mind on the forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 13, 2012, 03:56:23 PM
President Obama has invited Egypt's new president to meet him in New York when the United Nations General Assembly convenes in September, an administration official confirmed to The Hill.

http://thehill.com/blogs/global-affairs/middle-east-north-africa/236649-report-obama-invites-new-egyptian-president-morsi-to-visit-us

So, Obama can meet with a Moslem fundamentalist, but not the Prime Minister of Israel.  Hmm.


What's a "Moslem"?

I though in AZ they just used the generic term, browns.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on September 13, 2012, 04:18:29 PM
How does Landslide Lyndon avoid being on this list?

Easy, he wasn't nominated.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: courts on September 13, 2012, 06:11:33 PM
I'm hetero -- never in my life have I been attracted to a male, can't imagine one I would be, and I find gay sex unpleasant to think about.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 13, 2012, 11:57:13 PM
Breaking News: My grandmother has also devised a model to predict who will win the election this November.  She says Obama is going to win 310 electoral votes and every swing state including Colorado.

She's correctly predicted every election since 1956, so I think we should take her word for it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 14, 2012, 02:31:42 PM
Context.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on September 14, 2012, 03:48:42 PM
I'm hetero -- never in my life have I been attracted to a male, can't imagine one I would be, and I find gay sex unpleasant to think about.

Why is this funny?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 14, 2012, 03:59:42 PM
I'm hetero -- never in my life have I been attracted to a male, can't imagine one I would be, and I find gay sex unpleasant to think about.

Why is this funny?

Surely you've heard the old joke about 'me thinks the lady doth protest too much'.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 14, 2012, 09:40:38 PM
I'm hetero -- never in my life have I been attracted to a male, can't imagine one I would be, and I find gay sex unpleasant to think about.

Why is this funny?

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SuspiciouslySpecificDenial


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 14, 2012, 10:02:50 PM
I love the the desperate attempt to make Romney's "middle class" comment not seem ridiculous.

$200-$250k OR LESS FOR HOUSEHOLD is considered middle income, stop twisting the words around.
a household making 250K is not middle class, unless they have 4 or more dependents.
What if there were 4 people living in a household?  $50k-$75k annually is considered middle income.

No, it's not.  The median family brings in $50,000 a year, and  if you divided it by 4 (assuming there are 2 parents and 2 children) that would be $12,500 per. capita.  Thus, $50k-$75k is actually high.  
I'm saying if there were 4 adults living in a household and each one made $50k-$75k a year, that's still considered middle income.  What if they wanted to all live in the same house for whatever reason?

That is highly atypical. We're talking about real American families, not the cast of Jersey Shore.
Maybe some people don't want to own a home or start a family, not everybody lives a traditional lifestyle.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on September 14, 2012, 11:52:19 PM
I remember the first time my dad saw Alan Keyes on television and he turned to me and said "Where is that guy an ambassador to and how the he!! are we not at war with them?"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 15, 2012, 01:46:08 AM
https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=159230


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Vosem on September 15, 2012, 07:39:57 AM
I'm hetero -- never in my life have I been attracted to a male, can't imagine one I would be, and I find gay sex unpleasant to think about.

Why is this funny?

Surely you've heard the old joke about 'me thinks the lady doth protest too much'.

I must admit my phrasing in that post is...unusual. Laugh if you want, I suppose.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 15, 2012, 12:28:37 PM
I blame aflietch's threads. We need to pass a constitutional amendment.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 16, 2012, 02:56:08 AM

If you think the Yugoslav wars were awesome, then yeah, it would be pretty awesome.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 16, 2012, 03:18:31 AM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 16, 2012, 03:34:37 AM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

Oops! Wrong subcontinent.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 16, 2012, 08:48:37 AM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 16, 2012, 12:09:35 PM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

Oops! Wrong subcontinent.

Wasn't meant to be an Aladdin reference though that it where most of us first heard of people like Xahar.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 16, 2012, 12:56:46 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on September 16, 2012, 01:55:55 PM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

Oops! Wrong subcontinent.

Wasn't meant to be an Aladdin reference though that it where most of us first heard of people like Xahar.

Aladdin is where most of us first heard of "people like Xahar?!!"

Please tell me the obvious racism was unintentional.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 16, 2012, 04:55:42 PM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

Oops! Wrong subcontinent.

Wasn't meant to be an Aladdin reference though that it where most of us first heard of people like Xahar.

Xahar is an impoverished apple thief who supernaturally deceives his way into becoming a prince?  What an [inks]hole!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 16, 2012, 09:40:27 PM
I get confused for a Republican quite often.  It's very disappointing.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 16, 2012, 10:22:22 PM
Obama would hopefully then pin Romney down and cut his ugly hair in front of all his friends.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on September 16, 2012, 10:39:28 PM

Hmm?  I was actually serious :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 16, 2012, 10:42:25 PM

I know.  It's funny because I see it happen here all the time. :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on September 16, 2012, 10:43:05 PM
I know.  It's funny because I see it happen here all the time. :P

Oh, right ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 16, 2012, 11:48:12 PM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

Oops! Wrong subcontinent.

Wasn't meant to be an Aladdin reference though that it where most of us first heard of people like Xahar.

Leave the trolling to Naso, Phil.  You're supposed to be Abbott.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 17, 2012, 03:56:36 PM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

Oops! Wrong subcontinent.

Wasn't meant to be an Aladdin reference though that it where most of us first heard of people like Xahar.

Xahar is an impoverished apple thief who supernaturally deceives his way into becoming a prince?  What an [inks]hole!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 17, 2012, 04:40:02 PM
My favorite part of that post was that Phil selected an insult from Aladdin to direct at Xahar.

Oops! Wrong subcontinent.

Wasn't meant to be an Aladdin reference though that it where most of us first heard of people like Xahar.

Aladdin is where most of us first heard of "people like Xahar?!!"

Please tell me the obvious racism was unintentional.

Hilarious self parody! This coming from the guy who told me the other day that Germans aren't hand wringers. You can't make this up!


Title: Freedom wins!
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 18, 2012, 02:16:36 PM
We have been victorious!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 18, 2012, 02:17:59 PM
Could someone sum up for me the drama I missed yesterday?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 02:18:45 PM
You didn't win anything.  You weren't victorious because you weren't fighting anybody.  I made a mistake thinking people wouldn't care about the forum being locked.  When it became apparent that you weren't the only one desperately attached to its existence, I unlocked it... no fight.  No victory.  No winning... just realizing I incorrectly gauged the forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 18, 2012, 02:21:22 PM
Nominating the post below:

You didn't win anything.  You weren't victorious because you weren't fighting anybody.  I made a mistake thinking people wouldn't care about the forum being locked.  When it became apparent that you weren't the only one desperately attached to its existence, I unlocked it... no fight.  No victory.  No winning... just realizing I incorrectly gauged the forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Fmr. Pres. Duke on September 18, 2012, 02:22:41 PM
God bless America


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on September 18, 2012, 02:27:07 PM
You didn't win anything.  You weren't victorious because you weren't fighting anybody.  I made a mistake thinking people wouldn't care about the forum being locked.  When it became apparent that you weren't the only one desperately attached to its existence, I unlocked it... no fight.  No victory.  No winning... just realizing I incorrectly gauged the forum.
"No fight" because you realized resistance was futile - ie you got clobbered and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it except not locking the Institute.

Sounds like a victory to me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 02:30:07 PM
You didn't win anything.  You weren't victorious because you weren't fighting anybody.  I made a mistake thinking people wouldn't care about the forum being locked.  When it became apparent that you weren't the only one desperately attached to its existence, I unlocked it... no fight.  No victory.  No winning... just realizing I incorrectly gauged the forum.
"No fight" because you realized resistance was futile - ie you got clobbered and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it except not locking the Institute.

Sounds like a victory to me.

No... the second I would've seen support for Phil's wishes, I would've unlocked the thread.  The only reason I didn't was because I was in class right after I locked it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 18, 2012, 02:32:31 PM
I'm doubled over at this idea that Inks was going to bow to the very first hint of public displeasure as if he always does that. :D


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on September 18, 2012, 02:33:22 PM
You didn't win anything.  You weren't victorious because you weren't fighting anybody.  I made a mistake thinking people wouldn't care about the forum being locked.  When it became apparent that you weren't the only one desperately attached to its existence, I unlocked it... no fight.  No victory.  No winning... just realizing I incorrectly gauged the forum.
"No fight" because you realized resistance was futile - ie you got clobbered and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it except not locking the Institute.

Sounds like a victory to me.

No... the second I would've seen support for Phil's wishes, I would've unlocked the thread.  The only reason I didn't was because I was in class right after I locked it.
Please do not try to confuse me with barely-relevant facts. My mind is quite made up. As the self-appointed referee in this match, I declare Phil the winner.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 02:36:49 PM
I'm doubled over at this idea that Inks was going to bow to the very first hint of public displeasure as if he always does that. :D

There's no precedent for what I did here.  What I did was not an action out of a Terms of Service moderation, but merely what I understood to be unofficial forum precedent.  Once I would've realized that my understanding of how the goldmine worked wasn't the same as everyone else's, I would've undone what I did, since I wasn't acted under the TOS, but acting under the rules that had previously guided the goldmines.

Whether or not you believe me is irrelevant, because I know I'm right, since you can't know my thought process.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on September 18, 2012, 02:41:38 PM
Whether or not you believe me is irrelevant (...) you can't know my thought process.
Phil's beliefs are irrelevant and he doesn't know ESP. These are personal attacks, if you will.









Alright. I'll be quiet now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 18, 2012, 02:44:10 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Tender Branson on September 18, 2012, 02:46:52 PM
The Inks-ian hubris often amuses me ... ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Fmr. Pres. Duke on September 18, 2012, 02:48:11 PM
I hope a lesson was learned here today on the power of people. I would like to applaud Inks for realizing the error of his ways, and I pray that he repents and admits he was wrong.

You see friends, the measure of a man is not the length of his sword or the power in his fist, but it is his humility. Once Inks accepts he was wrong, repents to Us, Those that give him power, he will be set free. Until then, he will be hanged in the public square. I trust he will make the right decision. We are the 99%.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 02:58:42 PM
I hope a lesson was learned here today on the power of people. I would like to applaud Inks for realizing the error of his ways, and I pray that he repents and admits he was wrong.

You see friends, the measure of a man is not the length of his sword or the power in his fist, but it is his humility. Once Inks accepts he was wrong, repents to Us, Those that give him power, he will be set free. Until then, he will be hanged in the public square. I trust he will make the right decision. We are the 99%.

I've admitted I was wrong... I guess I can equate it to a mother, a frail and loving mother, seeing that her child dropped his favorite blankie in the mud.  Thinking that little baby will want a clean blanket, loving mother washed the blanket off and put it away and was going to get little baby a new blanket.

But baby wanted his old blanket back, and when loving mother realized that precious baby wanted his old blanket, loving mother kindly acquiesced and returned the old blanket to precious baby.

Then loving mother questioned why she didn't just get her freaking tubes tied and went upstairs for a glass of Scotch.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 18, 2012, 03:01:35 PM
Come on guys, you're among the Republican leaders of this forum. Make nice.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 18, 2012, 03:08:35 PM
Could someone sum up for me the drama I missed yesterday?

Pleeeeeeeeeeeease ! :'(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 18, 2012, 03:10:35 PM
Did this guy just say I'm a baby that needed his blanket? At this is the same guy who lectured me (here and privately) about being immature and too combative? Wow. This guy is ridiculous.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 03:12:28 PM

Phil called Xahar a "street rat". Someone pulled the racism card.  Phil got pissed and made some personall attacks.  Battle ensued.  15 or so posts were deleted.  I locked the thread thinking it was time for a new one.  People got pissed and wanted the old one back.  I realized people didn't want a new Goldmine and unlocked the thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 03:14:05 PM
Did this guy just say I'm a baby that needed his blanket? At this is the same guy who lectured me (here and privately) about being immature and too combative? Wow. This guy is ridiculous.

Dude, it was a comedic parody.  I don't actually think that you're a baby in need of a blanket.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 03:17:27 PM
Also, the reference was to the forum community as the whole.  If you want you could use an analogy of a father and his son with his first car.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on September 18, 2012, 03:19:56 PM
Congrats Phil


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 18, 2012, 03:20:39 PM
Christ, what's the big drama? Inks locked a thread that was turning into another bitchfest and, after receiving a feedback, decided to unlock. He had no obligations to unlock but did.

I don't know the content of the message Phil sent to Inks just as I don't know the content of Inks' response. All I can tell from my experience is that he's always been responding to my messages regarding moderating and never been a dick about this.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 18, 2012, 03:23:28 PM

Phil called Xahar a "street rat". Someone pulled the racism card.  Phil got pissed and made some personall attacks.  Battle ensued.

The "personal attack" phase was the last thing I saw before leaving the forum. I was looking for more details about the "ensuing battle".


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 03:24:43 PM
Christ, what's the big drama? Inks locked a thread that was turning into another bitchfest and, after receiving a feedback, decided to unlock. He had no obligations to unlock but did.

I don't know the content of the message Phil sent to Inks just as I don't know the content of Inks' response. All I can tell from my experience is that he's always been responding to my messages regarding moderating and never been a dick about this.

I'll admit I was less than cordial, but when you start a protest thread in FC, and The Atlas, send me a PM and a Facebook message demanding me to do something, I probably won't be as cordial as usual.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 03:25:40 PM

Phil called Xahar a "street rat". Someone pulled the racism card.  Phil got pissed and made some personall attacks.  Battle ensued.

The "personal attack" phase was the last thing I saw before leaving the forum. I was looking for more details about the "ensuing battle".

That was pretty much it - just back and forth about being a racist and personal attacks.  Then I started clearing stuff out.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on September 18, 2012, 03:27:34 PM
()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 18, 2012, 03:28:45 PM
Christ, what's the big drama? Inks locked a thread that was turning into another bitchfest and, after receiving a feedback, decided to unlock. He had no obligations to unlock but did.

I don't know the content of the message Phil sent to Inks just as I don't know the content of Inks' response. All I can tell from my experience is that he's always been responding to my messages regarding moderating and never been a dick about this.

I'll admit I was less than cordial, but when you start a protest thread in FC, and The Atlas, send me a PM and a Facebook message demanding me to do something, I probably won't be as cordial as usual.

It's good Phil haven't called you at home.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on September 18, 2012, 03:50:31 PM
I hope a lesson was learned here today on the power of people. I would like to applaud Inks for realizing the error of his ways, and I pray that he repents and admits he was wrong.

You see friends, the measure of a man is not the length of his sword or the power in his fist, but it is his humility. Once Inks accepts he was wrong, repents to Us, Those that give him power, he will be set free. Until then, he will be hanged in the public square. I trust he will make the right decision. We are the 99%.

I heart Dukey.

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: AndrewTX on September 18, 2012, 04:00:37 PM
^ I hearted him first, and he hearts me back!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 18, 2012, 05:33:19 PM
this thread went from funny to retarded to gay in a matter of 3 days


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 18, 2012, 06:26:20 PM
"Inks, go get laid"? Really?

Phil, are you a jock in a 1980s teen movie?

No...he's more like the 20 year old Mexican illegal immigrant dating a 14 year old girl in the 1990 direct to video movie we watched today in Spanish class.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on September 18, 2012, 06:44:05 PM

Phil called Xahar a "street rat". Someone pulled the racism card.  Phil got pissed and made some personall attacks.  Battle ensued.  15 or so posts were deleted.  I locked the thread thinking it was time for a new one.  People got pissed and wanted the old one back.  I realized people didn't want a new Goldmine and unlocked the thread.

Pretty much, yet people are still getting their knickers twisted. Honestly, I've never understood this total inks hatred.

In any case, there has been zero funny for days. New thread time.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 18, 2012, 06:50:59 PM
Dear students, faculty and staff,

Hope you enjoyed break. Class is back in session!





Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 18, 2012, 06:54:49 PM
Phil created this thread and Phil destroyed this thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 18, 2012, 06:56:17 PM

Now that would be ironic. ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 18, 2012, 07:25:23 PM
Phil created this thread and Phil destroyed this thread.

Kinda like what Mittens wanted to do with Romneycare.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 18, 2012, 08:39:43 PM
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread and have come to the conclusion that only someone with no friends would read the first 111 pages of this thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 18, 2012, 10:21:09 PM
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread and have come to the conclusion that only someone with no friends would read the first 111 pages of this thread.

Quote
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread

Quote
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread

Quote
111 pages

Quote
111 pages

wat


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸 on September 19, 2012, 12:26:34 AM
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread and have come to the conclusion that only someone with no friends would read the first 111 pages of this thread.

On the contrary, only someone with many friends on the Atlas forum would want to read the first 111 pages of this thread :)

but I must ask, what's wrong with pages 112, 113, etc. ?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: tmthforu94 on September 19, 2012, 01:14:32 AM
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread and have come to the conclusion that only someone with no friends would read the first 111 pages of this thread.
I'd rather read 111 pages of pbrower's posting history than do that. Seriously.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 19, 2012, 01:32:33 AM
This thread sucks now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 19, 2012, 01:38:48 AM

This thread needs emergency chemotherapy treatment.  Stat.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on September 19, 2012, 03:16:36 AM
party id:

D 42 R 37 I 16

2008:

D 39 R32 I 27

Junk nbc poll. again.
I'm looking forward to election night, when Democrats are oversampled one last time in the greatest junk poll of all.
If this is how he runs a campaign, imagine what a disaster a Romney presidency would be?

We wouldn't know what we would get from one day to the next.  It would be worse than flip-flopping.  I imagine there being Harriet Miers-type snafus on a weekly to monthly basis; constantly retracting decisions  and "trying something new" because they were so widely criticized and poor in the eyes of everyone.
I'm not a fan of Romney's flip flopping myself, he needs to grow a backbone, which McCain didn't have either. The only thing that flip flops more are flip flops themselves and pancakes.


Have you ever made pancakes? You flip the pancake one time. Your analogy, unsurprisingly, sucks.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 19, 2012, 05:37:37 AM
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread and have come to the conclusion that only someone with no friends would read the first 111 pages of this thread.

Quote
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread

Quote
I just read the first 111 pages of this thread

Quote
111 pages

Quote
111 pages

wat

Yeah I finished all my essays for school and so I go really bored so of course my first instinct would be to come to the Michael A Naso institute of comedy.

Although I didn't really read the first 111 pages, I kinda skimmed through them. It took me about 20-30 minutes total.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 19, 2012, 07:54:03 AM
Students,

I want you to take note of this excellent piece of work.


You all take this sort of thing much too seriously; the forum is a hallowed ground of procrastination, not a matter of life and death. Please consider investing in lives.

Most Time Online

1. Comrade Sibboleth  600days 14hours 20minutes


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 19, 2012, 07:58:58 AM
I'm still amazed that Phil, a grown up man with personal and professional lives, cares so much about a thread on some obscure political forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 19, 2012, 08:03:25 AM
I'm still amazed that Phil, a grown up man with personal and professional lives, cares so much about a thread on some obscure political forum.

...we have moved on, dude. And while I supposedly care so much, you keep talking about it and trying to pull these Jedi mind tricks. "No, this thread is done." Meanwhile, it isn't. Time for someone else to stop caring about it...

But you're right. I guess I should care more about posting pictures of cats doing "funny" things.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on September 19, 2012, 11:40:39 AM
Did this guy just say I'm a baby that needed his blanket? At this is the same guy who lectured me (here and privately) about being immature and too combative? Wow. This guy is ridiculous.

He called 47% of the forum babies, not just you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: SUSAN CRUSHBONE on September 19, 2012, 11:44:30 AM
Did this guy just say I'm a baby that needed his blanket? At this is the same guy who lectured me (here and privately) about being immature and too combative? Wow. This guy is ridiculous.

He called 47% of the forum babies, not just you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on September 19, 2012, 12:09:01 PM

This thread needs emergency chemotherapy treatment.  Stat.

Or maybe just taken behind the barn with a shotgun.

Phil, I appriciate the moral victory you feel you won keeping this thread alive another week, but maybe as OP you should just put the old girl out of her (and our collective) misery?

Whaddya say? I think most Goldmines have historically been put down when it reaches this level of bitchfest. I know it's hard, but every cute new kitten eventually turns into an old chronically ill cat....


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 19, 2012, 12:14:28 PM
Or maybe just taken behind the barn with a shotgun.

Phil, I appriciate the moral victory you feel you won keeping this thread alive another week, but maybe as OP you should just put the old girl out of her (and our collective) misery?

Whaddya say? I think most Goldmines have historically been put down when it reaches this level of bitchfest. I know it's hard, but every cute new kitten eventually turns into an old chronically ill cat....

I think it would be most amusing if the OP would close the thread just after Inks resigns. Ha ha!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 19, 2012, 12:27:28 PM
The Institute doesn't close its doors, Badger. There's no reason why this should end.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 19, 2012, 02:37:46 PM
Secretly taping an event is one thing (and potentially a crime), but then for Obama to pounce on it for political gain, is over the top. 

Romney should ask for an apology, and for Obama to pledge no additional dirty tricks in the campaign.  He should say it over and over again, and even start of the debate with asking for such a pledge and saying he will keep to one.

He needs to turn the perception of this on where it should be--the dispicable acts of the democratic party.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on September 19, 2012, 03:08:48 PM
^^^I thought winfield wrote that.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Marokai Backbeat on September 19, 2012, 08:59:04 PM
The country cannot run any longer with a 2nd Obama term.  The 47% takers and 53% makers are the population of the US.

Your username is "5280". Is that in reference to the number of times you were dropped on your head as a baby?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 19, 2012, 10:10:02 PM
Thanks Redalgo. It is nice to know someone out there can use the word "perspective" properly.

I was using it properly.

As to Redalgo's response, Have you not considered what's fair for that child in the womb? Yes they shouldn't be taking those kinds of risks to get a girl pregnant. Why do you think I advocate abstainince education.

Improper verb tense. "I used" is what you should have said. You certainly did not use "perspective" properly. Do you know what the word means? And I believe you meant to say "abstinence", which should be followed by a question mark.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on September 20, 2012, 01:10:47 AM
The Institute doesn't close its doors, Badger. There's no reason why this should end.

Really? Um, all the previous ones did eventually, but whatever.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The Mikado on September 20, 2012, 01:14:46 AM
It really is time for a new one, because these things are supposed to be short enough to be easily browseable after the fact and this one's way too big for said function.

Sadly, every time this thread gets put out of its misery, there's a colossal hissy fit, so whatever.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 20, 2012, 01:39:11 AM
All the prior threads were mere goldmines. But this is an institute for learned men. Hopefully it is never shut down.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: bgwah on September 20, 2012, 01:50:40 AM
This thread is usually restarted because someone wants to see their name as the thread starter more than anything...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Platypus on September 20, 2012, 02:38:44 AM
Indeed, so get over to my thread now please.

---------------

Or, this thread is more of a joke than the jokes. Feel free to crerate your own Goldmines.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 20, 2012, 08:17:27 AM
The Institute doesn't close its doors, Badger. There's no reason why this should end.

Really? Um, all the previous ones did eventually, but whatever.

Ok, um, the others weren't an Institute. Thanks.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 20, 2012, 08:36:02 AM
OK, can we all stop arguing here and simply resume posting funny stuff?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Keystone Phil on September 20, 2012, 08:37:35 AM
OK, can we all stop arguing here and simply resume posting funny stuff?

We stand united in honor of comedy and this hallowed institution.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mr. Morden on September 20, 2012, 08:45:55 AM
I've started to rename some of my old threads as "institutes", since that apparently makes them immune from being locked.  I'd urge all of you to follow suit, just to be safe:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=129447.msg2754863#msg2754863

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=152339.msg3267330#msg3267330

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=152099.msg3261898#msg3261898

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=81522.msg1686650#msg1686650

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=93015.msg1926981#msg1926981

Next step is to set up an "institute" for each individual post, so mods can't delete them.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 20, 2012, 10:00:38 AM
I've started to rename some of my old threads as "institutes", since that apparently makes them immune from being locked.  I'd urge all of you to follow suit, just to be safe:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=129447.msg2754863#msg2754863

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=152339.msg3267330#msg3267330

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=152099.msg3261898#msg3261898

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=81522.msg1686650#msg1686650

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=93015.msg1926981#msg1926981

Next step is to set up an "institute" for each individual post, so mods can't delete them.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on September 20, 2012, 10:35:06 AM
The Institute doesn't close its doors, Badger. There's no reason why this should end.

Really? Um, all the previous ones did eventually, but whatever.

Ok, um, the others weren't an Institute. Thanks.

Yeah, well nobody made it clear that an "Institute" is supposed to be the permanent thread.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 20, 2012, 05:57:37 PM
Can you please stop bitching and start posting funny stuff?

Thank you.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 20, 2012, 06:08:35 PM

Um, do you realize you just equated "being Phil" as an insult?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on September 20, 2012, 07:17:06 PM
It could have been worse. He could have said "I like tacos"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 20, 2012, 08:23:58 PM
I am starting to think Romney is trolling Republicans.


Man, Bozo the clown trying to save his campaign by going full Obama? Really?

He thought he could beat Ted Kennedy by BECOMING Ted Kennedy back in '94, and he's the senator from Massachusetts, right?

The event is comic in and of itself, though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: memphis on September 20, 2012, 11:36:22 PM
For someone so against handouts, Mitt Romney sure likes giving this election away


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 21, 2012, 01:28:22 AM
Context:

Congrats to both of you!

BTW: Hate to say it, but wearing skirts made you both look, well, kinda gay.

No offense.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on September 21, 2012, 12:25:38 PM
As the article clearly states, the comparison is between apples and fruit.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 21, 2012, 07:49:43 PM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 22, 2012, 01:16:38 PM
Oh ho ho, an oldie but a goodie, in context:

Media preferences for simple, false dichotomies and an illogical color scheme.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 22, 2012, 08:39:47 PM
Seems appropriate to post here:

Phil has received a one week ban for several vicious and unwarranted personal attacks in this thread which were deleted.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Kaine for Senate '18 on September 22, 2012, 11:14:30 PM
Anyone else worried somebody might go to the midnight opening show up at your door dressed up in a Gandalf costume and shoot up the place invite you on an unexpected journey?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Pingvin on September 23, 2012, 05:33:22 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 23, 2012, 12:09:14 PM

That would have been funny coming from a right-wing or center-right Frenchman.  As it was, not so funny.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 23, 2012, 12:46:39 PM

This is coming from an European :P


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 23, 2012, 03:07:48 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 23, 2012, 06:59:40 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on September 23, 2012, 08:50:27 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Napoleon on September 23, 2012, 08:58:34 PM

Yes, people who were never fans of posters are very likely to have them as Facebook friends for years including up to literally an hour ago, and then unfriend them right before making this post. Maybe you'll re-add him if the Moderate Hero position shifts against hating him.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on September 24, 2012, 02:46:52 AM
Context:

Could you blame her for not wanting to be associated with Mitt Romney's campaign?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 24, 2012, 02:13:48 PM
I've met people who are openly homophobic, racist, hate big Government...and yet embrace Obama and expect to vote for him.

That's when I came to the conclusion perhaps not everyone votes on issues or actual political viewpoints.

I see things different than most. When I see 92% of French people want Obama to win, that makes me want Romney to win. When I see the President defend the probable criminal Treyvon Martin, who for all intents and purposes was the same kind of punk that harassed me back in my grade school days, that makes me want to vote for whoever didn't defend Treyvon. When I see ridiculous union demonstrators and Obama clearly doesn't oppose them, I want to vote against those people and whoever agrees with them.

So my conclusion, based on the few Obama voters I have met, is that they are voting based on personality and not issues, or personal political views.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on September 24, 2012, 02:16:29 PM
For ban: 47%
Against ban: 49%

My numbers:

For ban 100%
Against ban 0%

Ban carries


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 24, 2012, 02:20:15 PM

Once again, it's just eerie to me how much this sounds like what I was thinking at this time in 2004.

I don't know any democrat who thought Bush's policies couldn't be changed or defeated even if he won a second term.  Our belief is that if Obama wins a second term, the policies that are enacted will stay permanently - developing a society that functions around cradle to grave government care that in short time gives way to an economic collapse that tips the balance of power in the world to Russia and China whilst the rest of the western world collapses into chaos. 

The democratic opposition to Bush was for a much less motivating reason.  It was primarily a combination of a feeling of delegitimacy left over from the 2000 election, anti-war protest and support for gay rights.  That's not like the opposition we have to Obama.  It wasn't the end of the country if Bush won a second term.  The country would make its typical cyclical shift between democrats and republicans every 8-12 years.  It certainly did during the 2008 election.  This year truly is different.  The feelings I described in the paragraph above are not just felt by a bubble of conservatives pushing conspiracy theories.  The view is near uniform among every single registered republican, even the republican moderates I know and many independents. 

You have no clue about the anger people felt about Bush in 2004. Hell, I still get angry thinking about it. We were fighting for the morals of the nation! We were fighting for the good name of America, a country that doesn't go around invading people just because it can.
That anger isn't even close to the feeling that your country will be irrevocably lost and destroyed. 

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Badger on September 25, 2012, 05:39:28 PM
Context:

"And why don't submarines have screen doors, anyway?"



Craigo is definitely one of the better new posters in a while.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Landslide Lyndon on September 26, 2012, 07:28:19 AM
No Republicans are coming to this board... we need to lure Republicans in here by hosting a barbecue or something. Then we slip them some ruffies, lock them in the basement and force them to look at the recent polls.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on September 26, 2012, 12:34:32 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on September 26, 2012, 12:58:51 PM
Anyways, "NV-POS (R)" is clearly Joe Republic.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 26, 2012, 01:18:13 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on September 26, 2012, 09:15:46 PM
The scary thing is, Akin may still win this.

I'd put his chances at about 35%. A clear chance, but he's still an underdog atm.

He's still the underdog, but his gaffs have not been fatal.  He's closing. 

Where's the evidence of that?

JJ's fourth rule of elections.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 27, 2012, 02:26:14 PM
for some reason I can't fastforward the CSPAN videos :(

More evidence that we're all in purgatory, and Dave Leip is the devil.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 27, 2012, 03:21:56 PM
context necessary:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 27, 2012, 05:12:37 PM

Very rarely are there posts that are flawless.
This is one of those posts.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on September 27, 2012, 05:54:11 PM
My numbers:

Northeast Region: 4.8 Aye, 2.2 Nay
Mideast Region: 9.6 Aye, 8.4 Nay
IDS: 6.4 Aye, 5.6 Nay
Pacific Region: 3.2 Aye, 0.8 Nay
Midwest Region: 5.6 Aye, 1.4 Nay
Total: 29.6 Aye, 18.4 Nay

Brought to you courtesy of the Popular Front for the Defense of the 2012 Board.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: King on September 27, 2012, 06:13:21 PM
A lot of you are going to put mypalfish to shame. Winfield and I will have the last laugh.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on September 27, 2012, 07:22:50 PM
Let's just cut out all the middle men and inaugurate Bibi while we are at it.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on September 28, 2012, 01:10:30 AM
LOL @ Democrats who think Romney is going the way of Mondale.

What are you going to do when Romney wins on Election Night?

Get into my trans-dimensional flivver and head home to this timeline where Obama has won.  It truly is a shame that one can't stay too long in other timelines without risking insanity.  That one where President Hollings used his veto to made certain that Social Security was not used to make the deficit appear like it had disappeared when it hadn't is one I would really like to live in.  Of course, the less said about that timeline where Perot won, the better.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on September 28, 2012, 05:12:23 AM
"Savings" I'm not sure what that is....is it a German word you picked up Franzl?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Mechaman on September 28, 2012, 05:54:29 AM
This could belong in the Deluge.  However, I think most of you will agree this is a more appropriate place:

...and in Iowa Democrats are asking for absentee ballots at a rate of 5:1 over Republicans... there are all kinds of dynamics, not the least of which being different deadlines and requirements.

If this is all you can point to, good luck to you.  

Yes, we all know the Chicago Machine has flooded Iowa. Big deal.

...and now conspiracy theories... keep going.

You guys are clinging to a few absentee ballots in Iowa. I mean, give me a break. We all know why that is happening in Iowa:

()



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on September 28, 2012, 12:47:24 PM
Yes, the past four years have pushed me further to the right on economics, but I am still to the left of many people on many social issues, especially relative to most Republicans.

Such as your belief that gay marriage is not a priority for America because gays usually die of AIDS anyway, so why should anybody care?

He did say "relative to most Republicans."


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 28, 2012, 02:14:11 PM
Yes, the past four years have pushed me further to the right on economics, but I am still to the left of many people on many social issues, especially relative to most Republicans.

Such as your belief that gay marriage is not a priority for America because gays usually die of AIDS anyway, so why should anybody care?

He did say "relative to most Republicans."

Excellent post.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 28, 2012, 02:23:33 PM
LOL


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Donerail on September 28, 2012, 10:15:49 PM
Yes, I too will strive to see that none of your legislation is passed! Mwahahaha!! >:D



Support.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Phony Moderate on September 29, 2012, 10:20:14 AM

Rudy?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on September 29, 2012, 01:59:29 PM
'Ever play the game"President Forever"?  I have the 2008 version with a 2012 scenario mod; playing through the game has given me some insights into how the election might play out.  If I had to guess, I'd say the Romney campaign is biding its time and won't roll out the big advertising blitz until at least October.  Once that happens, all bets are off.  For this reason, I'm not too concerned about Obama having more money or even that he's ahead in the polls. 


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on September 29, 2012, 02:16:58 PM

Yes, the ~ two months I took off from this weird place probably extended my life by far more than that, but I'm back nonetheless.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on September 29, 2012, 02:20:14 PM
You were gone?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on September 29, 2012, 11:03:54 PM
So now we have two rangas and two blacks?

Is one of you at least gay? I don't like this demographic shift one little bit.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 30, 2012, 04:50:01 PM

And unemployment was supposed to be well under 8% by now.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on September 30, 2012, 05:07:53 PM
Oh, Sanchez [...] I imagine Barry Goldwater when I read a Goldwater post, Mondale when mondale84 does or a young, Mexican Ron Paul when you do !!


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 01, 2012, 05:10:54 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 02, 2012, 12:06:50 AM
Todd Akin wouldn't agree to filibuster any bills. He's spoken with several political scientists and they have assured him that when Democrats propose socialist legislation, the Congress has natural mechanisms to shut that down.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 02, 2012, 12:16:02 AM

Rule #67 - No election is over until Clarence posts a picture of a morbidly obese woman.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 02, 2012, 09:22:37 AM
Context:



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 02, 2012, 06:45:05 PM
Vote as many times and as often as you choose.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 02, 2012, 08:28:10 PM
That poll is one of the funniest things I've ever read on this forum.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 03, 2012, 02:08:15 AM
This entry is to be displayed in the JSojourner Memorial 'People Who Converse With Their Own Sock Puppet' wing of the Institute:

UMMM.....by bringing attention to a serious problem which threatens our national security.

Stop it. NOW.


Appropriately enough, kenyanobama never said anything again after his puppet master apparently regained control of his own fractured psyche.

Oh yeah, and this means mondale84 has been banned.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on October 03, 2012, 03:37:39 AM
Aw. Joe Republic shows his fascist face.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Marokai Backbeat on October 03, 2012, 03:40:08 AM
Oh yeah, and this means mondale84 has been banned.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL0Qt7IF8Q4


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: H.E. VOLODYMYR ZELENKSYY on October 03, 2012, 04:57:23 AM
Damn! I might become a Southern Baptist if this keeps up.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 03, 2012, 06:56:30 AM
Oh yeah, and this means mondale84 has been banned.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHJoj9IqeKg


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 03, 2012, 11:25:53 AM
Sorry- the discussion of politics is not interesting enough with this dull race...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Јas on October 03, 2012, 11:27:27 AM

http://www.gallup.com/poll/124922/Presidential-Job-Approval-Center.aspx

Approve: 48%, +1


Disapprove: 45%, -1

Head to head, is still Obama 50% (+1), Romney 44% (-1). 


People slightly remembered the 47% comment a little more today.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Filuwaúrdjan on October 03, 2012, 12:01:34 PM
More and more I think the Republican Party has things it can learn from the Forum on how to be more successful in the War on Women.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 03, 2012, 01:09:27 PM
Obama will crumble under Mitt's legendary wit and flawless comic timing, but what man wouldn't?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 03, 2012, 02:59:28 PM
Oh yeah, and this means mondale84 has been banned.

YEAAAAAAAAAAH


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on October 03, 2012, 04:38:11 PM
Good.  The less idiots and hacks here, the better.  We know who goes next, right? ;)


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 03, 2012, 05:27:52 PM
What in the merciful hell is wrong with this man?

I would say that maybe he was dropped on his head as a child, but given the context that seems rather crass...


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Antonio the Sixth on October 03, 2012, 07:02:24 PM
Wait, even better idea! Newt Gingrich will barge onto the stage just as the candidates are walking up, and he pushes Mitt away from the podium, quickly and loudly announcing himself as the true Republican candidate. He announces that he legally changed his name to "Willard Mitt Romney" in late June, and due to some arcane technicality in RNC bylaws he's actually been the GOP nominee all along. The debate is momentarily put on hold as reporters and fact-checkers verify the claims. He turns out to be correct; Mitt Romney sheds a single tear and walks away, rejected and disappointed, with a soft "gosh darnit" heard from his lips as he manages to maneuver himself through the entire audience while looking down at his feet the entire time.

The bewildered Obama loses the debate in a rout due to Newt's charisma and sheer masculine energy. The sound clip of the night is Obama confusingly stating, "well- yes, I suppose if- I guess that when you uh- put it that way, Mr. Gingrich, sir, I think I really am a Saul Alinksky radical." This unprecedented defeat leaves Obama trailing badly in the polls; Newt/"Romney"'s lead becomes further intensified after the VP debates where Biden accidentally says "And Newt, honest to God, he's even better than Ronald Reagan" in the middle of a response regarding Paul Ryan's entitlement reform ideas.

Unable to face the transformative and desicive leadership of the Future Leader of the Free World, Democrats nationwide succumb to Newt Energy: the GOP rides Newt's massive coattails to supermajority control of Congress, where they immediately amend the Constitution to make Gingrich president for life.

And thus began the greatest era of freedom and prosperity America (and the moon) will ever know.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook on October 03, 2012, 07:30:02 PM
We can also watch evolution happen in the dark crevices of our refigerators.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 03, 2012, 10:13:07 PM
I'm double posting this because it both has a very funny part and a very brutal part.

Uh, JJ, you do realize that virtually every other pollster has shown Obama with a bigger lead in Ohio than PPP, right?

I have not trusted a mail poll since 1936.  ;)

I'm not crazy about those Uni polls for Ohio.  

J.J. I'm channelling The Professor here. Your assignment: Compare and contrast the polling methodology used by Literary Digest in 1936 vs. The Columbus Dispatch in the last several elections. Please reference the relative accuracy or inaccuracy of each poll relative to the final results.

Optional assignment: Quit hacking with grossly mismatched historical analogies.

Failing either will not help you get girls.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Bacon King on October 04, 2012, 11:53:58 AM
If Romney ends up closing the gap and winning, this forum after election day is going to be wildly entertaining. Literally the only Romney supporters we have here are like a gay atheist lawyer who smokes pot, a couple of fifteen years olds, and a few trolls. Versus literally everyone else. An absolutely insane dynamic.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on October 04, 2012, 02:49:13 PM
Another great new poster joins the Atlas forum:

I think more and more Americans are finally coming to the realization that Obama is an empty suit.

He was elected with the least experience of any president since Chester Arthur, and has consistently proved his intellect is, lets be kind and say "below average".

His understanding of foreign affairs, basic history and of course economics is at the high school level at best.

I personnally know 100's of people with more qualifications to be president than Obama had.

Now that the luster of "yeah but he's charismatic" is wearing off, perhaps the rock star menality that sways so many of his core constituency will keep them home this year, and we can get back to adults running the country.

Careful, don't mock him - he knows "100's" of United States Senators. :(


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Insula Dei on October 04, 2012, 04:57:38 PM
Suck my balls, National Election Pool Consortium !!!

Somehow even better with any reference to the context edited out.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 04, 2012, 05:13:34 PM
()

I know I speak for everyone when I say you will truly be missed. Your silly antics made the forum a brighter and better place. Keep on chasing rainbows, guys. We will remember you. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSz16ngdsG0)

()


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 04, 2012, 05:56:47 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Smid on October 04, 2012, 06:40:20 PM

This is a perfectly adequate sample size, if the people polled are members of the Electoral College.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on October 05, 2012, 03:29:04 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: minionofmidas on October 05, 2012, 03:49:15 PM
I too tend to dismiss science and most math as witchcraft and voodoo, but that's for reasons entirely apolitical and irreligious.

I found that funny.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: MASHED POTATOES. VOTE! on October 05, 2012, 04:17:47 PM
Context:

I am not an Orc. I'm nothing you've heard. I'm you.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 05, 2012, 05:22:19 PM
Oh, wow. They even manage to tie in unrelated political comments that she made on DailyKos almost eight years ago!

Take note of that, you youngins amassing thousands of posts here that want to run for office someday. I assure you, unless you're as secretive about your identity as, like, Mikado, your opponents will probably connect it to you. (And you can't just delete it either because caches are totally a thing!)

The people here will be saved when Dave finally pulls the plug on the forum to save server money for the rest of the site one day (no one's going to go through archive.org and navigating through dozens of missing pages to try to find a quote they don't even know exists).

Yeah, I think President Snowstalker or whoever will catch a break when Dave decides to get rid of the old shame that is the forum part of the Atlas in 2017, removing all the pony posts from the internet forever.

Facebook's another story, though.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: they don't love you like i love you on October 06, 2012, 11:52:21 AM
LOL, funny how this goes over Torie's head.

To be fair, The Big Bang Theory is awful.

Really?  Why do you think that?  It seems to be the leading theory these days, with substantial evidence backing it up. I just got a refresher course went I went to watch a program at the Griffith Park Planetarium in LA a few months ago.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: 後援会 on October 06, 2012, 08:26:02 PM
Mitt Romney is not a governor. He is an ex-governor. The governor of Massachusetts is Deval Patrick.

In America, ex-politicians are generally called by their most recent office held as a matter of courtesy, which is why (for instance) Bill Clinton is still introduced as President Clinton and Mitt Romney is still Governor Romney.

I've always thought it's a pretty ridiculous custom. You don't see the BBC calling Tony Blair the Prime Minister, for example.

Thankfully the UK doesn't have ridiculous titles given for life.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Grumpier Than Uncle Joe on October 07, 2012, 04:25:32 PM
Reminds me of that one city entrance sign in Frankfurt that's been amusing me for years despite the crass lowbrowness of the statement.

[official print]Frankfurt am Main[/official print]
[vandalism]Wir Ficken Jeden[/vandalism]


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자) on October 08, 2012, 12:34:55 PM
Reminds me of that one city entrance sign in Frankfurt that's been amusing me for years despite the crass lowbrowness of the statement.

[official print]Frankfurt am Main[/official print]
[vandalism]Wir Ficken Jeden[/vandalism]

I used Google translate on this (to find out what "Jeden" meant, "Wir Ficken" was obvious) and as I was checking on the translatio options for each word, noted that an alternative possible translation for Frankfurt was London.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: opebo on October 08, 2012, 05:19:21 PM
A good reason for anyone to vote against him is the fact that he's a war criminal, although I understand that your unique and special morality may cause you to view such things from a somewhat different angle.
It is, alas, not nearly as unique as it is special.

Together these amused me a lot, though they're not really 'comedy'.. they're almost a very mild zinger against the awful Dead0man, but not quite.  So, I put them here.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 11, 2012, 04:39:09 PM
Hate to be all Youtube comments section, but it looks like 8 people need to have electricity 'applied' to their genitals.

Shock therapy, amirite?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: World politics is up Schmitt creek on October 12, 2012, 08:58:43 AM
Context:

For all their belief in the supremacy of the market, these Objectivists are ignoring it surprisingly well.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Oakvale on October 12, 2012, 09:48:09 AM
So if I give a lot of money to charity and a little to The Party might I get a knighthood?
Yes.
Quote
If a give a boatload to charity and a lot to The Party might I get a life peerage?
That is, in fact, the only way.
Quote
And, if I give an astronomical sum to charity and a boatload to the party, maybe, just maybe, might I secure a hereditary peerage?
No. That's right out.



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on October 12, 2012, 11:38:36 AM
God, I hope they make Part III. It would be a two-hour long speech and it would be the most hilarious movie ever made.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Simfan34 on October 12, 2012, 05:47:27 PM
Skewered? As in, "Skewer to the chest, who won the debate?"


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 13, 2012, 08:40:01 AM
At first I thought you're in Dallasfan65 and that kind of scared me.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 14, 2012, 11:55:37 AM
You're skirting the main issue here:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=145546.0


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 14, 2012, 02:40:57 PM
With about twelve other boards, I can understand why you'd think the 2012 board was the most appropriate place to post about the death of a non-Presidential candidate.


True, but I'd argue that is the BIG board.

Plus he WAS considered to be a candidate in 1996.

Besides, do you really need another thread about the election?


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Joe Republic on October 14, 2012, 03:05:50 PM
Re: Arlen Specter reported to have died



Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 14, 2012, 04:16:03 PM
Ironically, more people can relate to Ryan than Biden. 

()

In keeping with your bad Ruth dugout analogy, J.J., that's strike two.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: The world will shine with light in our nightmare on October 14, 2012, 06:06:19 PM
Yes, we know that obama gets the vote of those deviants.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Snowstalker Mk. II on October 14, 2012, 08:19:57 PM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Lief 🗽 on October 15, 2012, 12:45:03 AM
2004 Ohio Exit Polls
Liberal 19%
Moderate 47%
Conservative 34%

2008 Ohio Exit Polls
Liberal 20%
Moderate 45%
Conservative 35%

This Poll
Liberal 29%
Moderate 29%
Conservative 42%

srry dis poll is wrong.  too Many conservatives and libruls  here are my numbers thank you pls scrubscribe to my blog

Obama 51.25
Romney 46.32

oh wait My numbers are the Same as the fake numbers neverrmind

still pls add Me On Facebook and join mailing lists


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Linus Van Pelt on October 15, 2012, 07:33:29 PM
Riots are more likely in the event of an Obama loss simply because Romney voters are too old to riot.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Brittain33 on October 16, 2012, 10:16:28 AM
Yeah, the fact that Naso isn't seeing Obama ads is actually an example of how advanced Obama's media campaign is.


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Хahar 🤔 on October 16, 2012, 11:14:47 AM


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: © tweed on October 16, 2012, 12:08:37 PM
Yeah, the fact that Naso isn't seeing Obama ads is actually an example of how advanced Obama's media campaign is.

lol


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: They put it to a vote and they just kept lying on October 16, 2012, 03:32:45 PM
Quote
Post Modified for Woman not big enough with 5 (out of 10) infraction points


Title: Re: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy
Post by: Queen Mum Inks.LWC on October 17, 2012, 08:34:52 PM
Dave has given soft guidelines (https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=153452.msg3469671#msg3469671) to keep threads to about 2,000 replies, as apparently the more replies a thread has, the more burden it puts on the server, so I'm going to lock this and start a new thread.

Please use the Michael Assad thread instead.