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1  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 04:55:29 pm
bushie why were you uninvited to kansas city?

and has papa bushie begun clearing out his train room to make room for you to move back in, which apparently youve already done?

He's answered this a couple of times already. You should read the Update to keep up with these sorts of thing Smiley

the only answer i saw was that his uncle didnt want him to come.  i guess i am asking why didnt his uncle want him to visit?

From what he said, it sounds like he was never invited; he just assumed he could tag along and ended up finding out that was not the case.
2  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 04:29:43 pm
I'll be completely honest with my pastor.  I am honest on Facebook, and that's what I'll tell him and more.
Jeff, if you were honest on Facebook, you wouldn't have deleted Andrew and I.  You may not be dishonest with those on Facebook (although Rainbow Play Systems was certainly an outright lie), but you are selective in what you share; you share the good and not the bad, for the most part.  While that's not dishonest, it leads to people creating a perception about you that is different from reality.

And will you really be completely honest?  You'll tell him about the crying episodes, the screaming outburst, the repeated lying about your weight, the use of your parents money to buy porn, your tendency to rush into making decisions, your financial dependence on your parents without making any personal financial sacrifices?  And these are just naming a few.  This is all part of the overall problem, and they're all connected.  If you're not sharing all this and more, talking to your pastor is pointless.

Quote
Where are you reading that I'm too busy?  I am not in any way using that excuse.  I'm just saying that in case he wants to follow up with me and is in a different city, I don't have to travel 100 miles each way to see him once a week or whatever it is.
This is why God invented Skype.

Quote
Plus, I DO NOT NEED TO SEE A PSYCHIATRIST.  I am not mentally ill like you seem to suggest.  I do take that offensively, because it is offensive to me.  The pastor is as good as you're going to get. So, just, SHUT UP!!!

OK, Jeff, again, you're not even reading what I'm saying.  Even if you're perfectly mentally healthy, I'm suggesting that you see a psychiatrist the same way that you would see a doctor for a yearly physical or a dentist for a teeth cleaning.  Think of it as preventive medicine.  And the sentence, "The pastor is as good as you're going to get" really saddens me... you seem to think that you should be doing this stuff to make me or the forum happy.  That's not it at all.  You should be doing this to improve your life and help get you on the track to success.

Personally, I think you need to see a psychiatrist or therapist, but that's just my opinion.  I'm merely pointing out that even if I'm wrong, you have absolutely nothing to lose by going.  It just astounds me that you're so adamant about not going.  You don't tell people, "I DON'T NEED TO GO TO THE DENTIST! So just SHUT UP!" or "I DON'T NEED TO GET MY BLOODWORK DONE!  So just SHUT UP!"  So I really don't understand why you're reacting differently here.
3  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 04:13:22 pm
As soon as I get my employment settled,

Why wait?

Since I'm looking in two different cities, I want to wait until I get my employment settled so in case my pastor wants to schedule follow-up visits.

Jeff, you're just making excuses now.  You know you have time to schedule this stuff.  Your job hunt hasn't stopped you from taking naps and watching dozens of hours of TV.  You're embarrassing yourself by putting forward this argument that you're too busy.

And I'd still like to hear your answer to why you do not want to see a psychiatrist or professional therapist.  It can't simply just be "Because I don't need to."  There must be something more.  You go to the dentist periodically, even when you don't have cavities; you get your bloodwork checked frequently, even though you don't have diabetes.  So why is this different?  I don't understand your strong insistence against just going and talking with someone who's trained in this stuff.
4  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 04:10:49 pm
Putting the psychiatric see your pastor talk aside for a little bit.  I am preparing for a weekend by myself at my parents' this weekend.  Mom is busy packing for their trip this weekend.  They leave tomorrow morning early and come back Monday afternoon since Monday is a holiday (Columbus Day).  I have an interview tomorrow morning at 10:30 in NW Oklahoma City.  I'll leave here at 9:30 and should be home by 12:00.  It's supposed to be a rainy day tomorrow with the remnants of Tropical Storm Simon, so I will likely stay in tomorrow evening.  I will head home to Tulsa Monday at Noon and then be back Thursday afternoon so we can head to New Mexico on Friday.  From there, it all depends on what happens with tomorrow's interview if I stay in Tulsa or come down and move in with Grandma.

Ftfy.  I don't do the religion, but from what I understand pastors would have experience with helping their pastees through life issues through incorporation of the faith.  It's reasonable piece of advice, Jeff.

The problem is that Bushie will talk to a pastor that he knows and is quite comfortable with; it'll probably be somebody who's known him for a long time.  And we know that Bushie isn't honest with those people.  His home pastor is probably the same types who encouraged him about Kenya and wanting to adopt the kids.  He shares these optimistic half-truths with people he's close with.  If he's going to see a pastor he doesn't know and actually shares everything, that's one thing, and that'd be helpful.  But if he goes and shares the Facebook version of his life, making himself sound like a normal, humble saintly man just trying to help the world, the pastor very well could encourage him to keep doing what he's been doing.  Jeff, not realizing that the process doesn't work if he doesn't put in 100% effort and tell the pastor everything, will come back here gloating that he took our advice and it turned out that he was right.  A doctor will see through stuff like that; Bushie's pastor, who I'm sure Bushie considers a friend, probably won't see through Bushie's lies.  If he hasn't said anything yet about Jeff's behavior, it's probably because Jeff hides it well, and I don't think he's going to discover it with some quick session with Jeff.
5  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 01:27:53 pm
Jeff, what would be the harm in seeing a mental health professional?

There'd be no harm, but I just don't want to see one.

But why not?  It can't simply just be "Because I don't need to."  There must be something more.  You go to the dentist periodically, even when you don't have cavities; you get your bloodwork checked frequently, even though you don't have diabetes.  So why is this different?  I don't understand your strong insistence against just going and talking with someone.
6  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 11:45:14 am
Jeff, what would be the harm in seeing a mental health professional?
7  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 11:34:37 am
Lief and Eraserhead are different people, Inks.

Lol... that's what I get for pushing "Show" in this thread.

EDIT: Although I will say that they both have the same general attitude when it comes to their treatment of Jeff.
8  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 11:19:44 am
No, I don't think it's at all normal for those episodes to repeatedly happen. And now that he's acknowledged this latest one, perhaps with some guidance, he'll actually seek the attention he needs.

It's more common than you'd think. I had a technician in the field freaking out this morning, and it was due to a lot more than basic on-the-job issues. He's likely got a lot more piled on him (some of which I know about, some of which I likely don't) that's aggravating his mental state.

People handle pressure differently, but his cat-scratch breakdowns are probably equivalent to other people getting pissed off and shutting down, or lashing out, or going on a three-day bender. I'll call BS on anyone who says they haven't, at some point in their life, felt overwhelmed by their situation and acted in a way that wasn't typically "them."

And while I don't agree with you on the abnormality of such breakdowns, I think we'd both agree that something should happen to mitigate them in the future. Episodes like that repeatedly happen if their root causes are not addressed.

I'm not saying it's not uncommon; but that does not mean that it is normal or healthy.  I too have seen coworkers who've had breakdowns (a guy who broke his hand punching a wall and a guy who broke a couple hundred dishes by throwing them on the floor and at his boss, along with various employees who've just simply broke down and cried over various personal issues).  But this is more than "at some point" in Jeff's life.  It's happened multiple times in under a year; it's the frequency and severity of the episodes that's most concerning to me, not merely the fact that he's cried.
9  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 11:16:57 am
No, I don't think it's at all normal for those episodes to repeatedly happen. And now that he's acknowledged this latest one, perhaps with some guidance, he'll actually seek the attention he needs.

So, crying as a man indicates a need of professional mental attention?

Is that what I said?  Come on, Jeff... if you're going to claim that you have good critical thinking skills, you have to stop twisting people's words; that doesn't show that you actually understand what we're saying.

There's nothing wrong with crying as a man; however, you have a history of having breakdowns that are much more than crying.  To break down over a cat scratching you is not typically normal, and to have these breakdowns every few months isn't normal either.  It's certainly not normal or healthy to have an episode where you go in your car and scream to the point of nearly passing out; most people don't let their emotions get to that point... it's pretty clear you have some problem not letting your emotions build up.  And it's not normal for a person to go from super-optimistic and carefree to crying and cursing in his car back to super-optimistic and carefree in the span of a few hours.

If you had one of these episodes in the workplace, it'd probably raise eyebrows from coworkers and your employer.  Why not get a handle on it?  I really don't understand your complete refusal to see a mental health professional.  Why not think of it as a checkup?  You go to the doctor to get physicals; why not just see a mental health professional to make sure everything's ok?  You can't say the time is an issue; you have all the time in the world.  And you can't say money is an issue, because my offer to pay for the visit still stands.
10  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 10:35:29 am
No, I don't think it's at all normal for those episodes to repeatedly happen. And now that he's acknowledged this latest one, perhaps with some guidance, he'll actually seek the attention he needs.
11  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 09, 2014, 10:18:03 am
Eraser, it was a cat scratch-like episode.

Jeff, honest question: How can you honestly think you do not need to see a mental health professional, keeping in mind the fact that most people over the age of 12 (give or take a couple years) don't have any "cat scratch-like episodes" and you've had 3 as a 30+-year-old man?
12  General Politics / U.S. General Discussion / Re: 5.8 million Americans can't vote because of their criminal records (+ map) on: October 07, 2014, 06:32:38 pm
Gotta stop the blacks from voting, it's what our founding fathers would want.

Except you have to remember that most states were prohibiting felons from voting before African Americans were given the right to vote.  So quite clearly, this was not done as a proxy to stop blacks from voting.  For an interesting timeline, see here.
13  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Inks got engaged on: October 07, 2014, 06:23:39 pm
Inks certainly didn't mind posting embarrassing crap like "taking an Atlas break after some prayer".  Why would he mind the happy times good things?

I have no clue what the prayer thing is in reference to, but no, I don't mind Ben posting this.

Didnt you claim to take an Atlas break after "thoughtful prayer""?  Or am I thinking of Oldies?

It wasn't me.  I don't know if it was Oldiesfreak, but I know either he or cathcon (I don't remember which) took a break recently.

Are we invited to the wedding?


Will you be bringing a good gift? Wink
14  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: October 07, 2014, 04:48:27 pm
Here is why I rarely listen to the forum.  Most of the forum thinks I can't do anything, or can't do anything significant.  Friends don't think their friends can't do anything.  That's where most of the forum utterly fail.  They never give me a chance and try to discourage me from EVERY friggin job I come across.  Shut up, will ya.

Name one significant thing you've accomplished in the past 3 years.  And no, graduating CAD or holding a job for <12 months is not significant.  I'm talking about things that have meaningfully increased your place in life.

You threw thousands of dollars at CAD, and now you're talking about ditching that entirely and dropping hundreds or potentially thousands of dollars on getting A+ certified.  Did your CAD job even pay off your debts from taking the CAD classes?  There's nothing wrong with educating yourself, but if you just run to the next shiny object you see, you're wasting tons of money each time.  Jeff, if all you're getting is a 38%, this job isn't for you.  I'm not saying you can't get a 75% if you study, but the people who will be successful post hiring are going to be the people who get a 75% easily, not those who struggle at it.  Look at the experience at your last job: lack of training and knowledge led to your downfall.  The same thing will happen here.  You're not good at customer service or technical support, especially if you have to be travelling to do it.  What happens if it snows and you have a call or you're sick?  Jobs in tech support aren't going to keep you around when you call off.

But  Bushie YOU are the one applying for a job where a certification that you do not have, and likely will not have in 90 days is required.  And you call us crazy?

I've already got one certification from my time at Dell.  So, I know I can knock this out of the part, too.  Plus, if I get this certification, it will be another feather in my quill that I'll always have with me and will help me tremendously in future job openings.

Most technology certifications either have to be periodically renewed or become obsolete after a few years. I know Microsoft's certs are only valid 4 years and then you have to retake them.

Arrow in your quiver, Jeff. The expression is arrow in your quiver.

It's also "knock this out of the park", not "part".

500 hours I won't gain, I will agree.  It doesn't mean I can't pass the tests.

Passing the tests doesn't mean you'll get or hold a job.  It does mean that you'll be out the money it cost to take and study for the tests.

J-Mann, as much as I respect your opinions and appreciate your analysis, I have to believe that I can do this, pass the tests, and spend quite a while in this job.  If it falls flat, then so be it.   I'm prepared for whatever.

But you're not prepared for whatever.  You never are.  That's the point.  You're still dependent (now 100%) on your parents... they're the ones who are prepared, and they're prepared because they're used to seeing you fail over and over again (and that's not an insult; it's an objective fact), so they can anticipate it.  But what's going to happen when they aren't there to prop you up anymore?

King, I don't have to convince myself.  I'm a pretty smart cookie and I'm positive I can do this.  If I fail, I fail, but if I succeed that's all the better.

No offense, but "pretty smart cookies" don't fall for even half the scams you've fallen for.  You're gullible, naive, and irrational.  If you fail, your parents are out hundreds of dollars; you won't succeed.  I will promise you this now.  If you somehow get this job, you won't hold onto it for 6 months.  If you do, I'll personally send you a check to cover the cost the tests and study materials.
15  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Inks got engaged on: October 07, 2014, 04:26:09 pm
Thank you everyone.

I assume this is confirmation?  Congrats then!  Feel free to regale us with the details of you like.

Yes, it's confirmation.  I took her up to Mackinac Island under the pretense that we were going up there for a campaign event for a candidate I've done some work for.  I left her for a bit and called her to have her meet me at Biddle Point (for those familiar with the island, it's the southern tip of the island, over by Goodfellow's), and that's where I asked her.  Then we went up to the Grand Hotel for dinner and walked around the island for a bit.  The rain held off for a couple hours, so I was able to get the proposal in during the dry time, but the weather was pretty dreary the rest of the night.  We came home the next day after stopping to pick up some fudge and taffy.

Overall, it was a fun weekend, and we're both thrilled to be engaged.
16  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Inks got engaged on: October 07, 2014, 04:15:42 pm
Inks certainly didn't mind posting embarrassing crap like "taking an Atlas break after some prayer".  Why would he mind the happy times good things?

I have no clue what the prayer thing is in reference to, but no, I don't mind Ben posting this.
17  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Inks got engaged on: October 07, 2014, 04:14:18 pm
Thank you everyone.
18  General Politics / Political Geography & Demographics / Re: Virginia Congressional map struck down on: October 07, 2014, 04:13:35 pm
The court reached an ethical outcome, but it's the wrong legal outcome, and the logic to get there was sloppy.  While I'm happy to see the gerrymander thrown out, it shouldn't have been thrown out on racial equal protection grounds, and strict scrutiny was not the proper standard to use.

I agree with the dissent that race was not the predominant factor motivating the legislature to act as it did; the predominant factor, based on the evidence before the court, in my opinion, was incumbent protection.  It could be argued that partisan politics was the predominant factor (and many Democrats did argue this); however, that would also preclude strict scrutiny from being used.
19  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 27, 2014, 11:49:08 am
bushie, it is unfortunate but cadd might not be for you.

It's better than customer service.  I'm not going to give up on CAD.  I know I can do it, and I was starting to get it, I just need a more patient boss.

Anyway, I have PM'd some of the Update readers the name of my family member's company for their investigation.  I look forward to reading their findings.

You should've gotten it while you were taking CAD classes. You thought leaving early wouldn't affect you, but it's looking like that contributed to the position you're in now.
20  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 26, 2014, 05:20:20 pm
So apparently you're not as good at reading your boss as you thought. It's like you're on a roller coaster of thinking you're fine to thinking you're on the verge of getting canned. If you're ever going to keep a job, you need to be more observant and grounded.

No matter what, I would not quit this job, though. Because if you do that, you're probably done with CAD forever.
21  Questions and Answers / The Atlas / Re: question for the predictions on: September 25, 2014, 11:04:07 pm
Did we really need a third thread this month on this subject?
22  Forum Community / Off-topic Board / Re: Jennifer Lawrence and many other celebrities... on: September 25, 2014, 03:13:12 pm
Why do they even take these pictures anyway?

Sexting.  I thought that was obvious.  Huh

Important to remember:

It's true, a scientific argument for pro-life is growing. Personally I'm mixed on the subject. I'm sure most people who get abortions are sluts that don't want to/can't handle children and want to keep sleeping around. That's not right.
That has nothing to do with this. And why store them in the cloud anyway? Can't they store them in their own computers? (Or their buddies commputers)

Those who select to have iCloud back up their photos automatically likely never thought about it.  I'm guessing that most people selected to have auto-backup turn on for their pictures in general and didn't think, "I'd like these nude selfies back up to iCloud."
23  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: What is your current ignore list? on: September 25, 2014, 01:02:14 pm
Lief and Aizen's new account
24  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 25, 2014, 10:26:00 am
Nagas,

I seriously doubt it.  If I get let go, I'm sure it will be a respectful and cordial affair.  I am doing really well in my actual work and he has told me before that my help is appreciated and needed.  The poor review appears to be a thing of the past and I'm starting to look forward to my next review in early October.  I'm not getting cocky, naturally, but i'm not exactly worried.  He is a very understanding guy.  He wants the work to be done and done well, but he is also a human being who is sensitive to the needs of his employees.  I have no reason to be concerned at this point.

You do realize that this conflicts with his giving you a week off without notice, right?  I'm not saying you're going to get canned (and I think some of the forum's fears about that are over the top), but if you were truly needed, you wouldn't just get a week off on the fly.  That's a lot different from a vacation that you planned and were able to make arrangements for people to cover your duties.  If you're dispensable for an entire week, are you really needed?  You do have a reason to be concerned (again, not as much as some on the forum are saying you should be), but I don't think you're connecting all the dots.

As for people encouraging you to take this other job with your cousin's brother or whoever it is, I'd advise against that.  If that falls through or you don't like it, you've thrown away a job that you seem to like and enjoy, and quitting this job without accumulating some tenure is only going to hurt your résumé.  Obviously that won't matter if you stick with your relative's company after this job, but if that doesn't work out, you've really screwed yourself going forward, because your résumé will then show two short-tenure positions with CAD employers, which will make future CAD employers VERY hesitant to hire you.  I see no reason to discuss this with your parents... I think the risks greatly outweigh the benefits regarding leaving your current job.

The only problem with this new company is it is in Oklahoma City, so I would have to move yet again while keeping my apartment in Tulsa since the lease doesn't run out until May 31.

I probably shouldn't tell you this, since keeping the apartment incentivizes you to stay, but just in case something happens with your current job, you could always sublease your Tulsa apartment.
25  General Politics / U.S. General Discussion / Re: What is Republican economic policy? on: September 24, 2014, 11:12:28 am
Right now?  Oppose whatever Obama is for.  That seems to sum up what it's become.
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