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October 01, 2014, 12:58:19 am
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News: Don't forget to get your 2013 Gubernatorial Endorsements and Predictions in!

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1  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 30, 2014, 11:13:42 pm
I wish Bushie would meet with J-Mann, but I know he won't. He'll be too busy playing on his tablet while his family sits around the TV.

I'll definitely take laziness over;

"Mom, Dad, I'm going to leave a bit early to meet with a friend for dinner in Kansas City"

"Oh you most certainly will be doing no such thing, young man!  Sit down and talk to your grandmother about bridge club!"

"Yes, sir." 

"Jeff, what's this I hear about you talking to strangers on the Interweb? Your father and I are very upset with you. Go sit in the train room and we'll come in to discuss this in a little while!"
2  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: What is your favorite berry? on: September 30, 2014, 09:36:55 pm
(1) Halle


(2) Marion


(3) Franken
3  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 30, 2014, 09:33:22 pm
Just got fired. Resumes usual pattern of TV-watching and having family dinners with distant relatives who randomly show up all the time. Way to make those changes to be successful. Give yourself a pat on the back.
4  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 30, 2014, 08:16:24 pm
I'm going to try to steer this thread back to the crisis at hand.

Jeff, why don't you consider finding a relatively non-demanding non-CADD job (yes, it will probably be hourly and minimum wage or close to it) and doing that for a few months while you work on improving your CADD skills? You're obviously not at a place right now where you can perform at a professional level. If you were, you wouldn't have been fired today.

A different job at a larger firm isn't going to address the root problem. Companies don't want to have to train you on-the-job. That's supposed to be what you went to school for. They can easily hire someone else who got better grades than you did and hasn't been fired from any drafting positions. If you're not ready to hit the ground running from day one, you have no business walking in the door. Take a few months to get yourself more up to speed.
5  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: opinion of algebra on: September 30, 2014, 08:03:59 pm
It was invented by the Muslims. Therefore it's the Devil's mathematics and we ought to stop using it.
6  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update for Everyone II - Less Boring, More Whoring on: September 29, 2014, 10:41:37 pm
I thought pretty much all college campuses were smoke-free at this point.
7  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: How do you plan to vote? on: September 29, 2014, 10:11:35 pm
Miles, have you ever registered to vote in LA?
8  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 29, 2014, 10:07:57 pm
Why can't you be Halloween Bushie this month? You're skipping over a very important holiday, Jeff.
9  Presidential Elections - Analysis and Discussion / 2016 U.S. Presidential Election / Re: The Revenge of Rand Paul (New Yorker) on: September 29, 2014, 09:17:34 pm
Quote
Randís friendship with George Paul was itself a small act of rebellion. George and Rand, who were both on the Baylor swim team and often spent six hours a day in the pool, became so close that, shortly after they arrived at Baylor, George legally changed his name from George Paul Schauerte to George Schauerte Paul.


Am I the only person wondering if there's "more" to this?
10  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: opinion of trigonometry on: September 29, 2014, 08:35:33 pm
Hated it when I was in Middle School.

Started to like it when I was in College (cosinus blabla).
You took trig in middle school? You must have been an exceptionally gifted math student.

I don't think anyone in middle school took it as a separate class, but don't most people get introduced to the basic concepts of trigonometry in 8th grade algebra?
11  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 29, 2014, 08:32:39 pm
I must say, the product placement this season is getting very innovative. Get the viewers talking about the sponsors.
12  Other Elections - Analysis and Discussion / Gubernatorial/Statewide Elections / Re: OK-Gov: The Darkest and Horsiest race of 2014? on: September 29, 2014, 08:00:33 pm
Gubernatorial elections this year, by and large, have been local.

No doubt a reaction to 2010, in which every race was ridiculously nationalized, right down to county tax assessor. You had a crop of new Republican governors come in. Some of them governed within the political realities of their state and avoided ideological parroting (Brian Sandoval, John Kasich, Bill Haslam). Others thought they could simply read from ALEC's script in Ronald Reagan's voice and failed miserably at it (Sam Brownback, Paul LePage, Tom Corbett).
13  General Politics / U.S. General Discussion / Re: Beheading in Oklahoma plant on: September 29, 2014, 07:35:51 pm
....when a soft brain with hood rat values meets radical Islam....

Kind of like those Americans who went to fight with ISIS and were posting semi-intelligible stuff on Facebook misspelling basic Islamic terms and basically demonstrating they had no clue what the hell they were talking about.

I thought people like this were what the Nation of Islam was for.
14  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 29, 2014, 07:23:35 pm
My impression of WalMart workers has been more that they simply don't give an Inks about your precious S2S purchase. Being in a hurry to help people has never been their strong point. But if you're already online, why not just have whatever you're buying shipped to your home? Or, conversely, if you prefer to go to the store, why bother going online? Are you buying something so supremely obscure that it's not ordinarily carried by The Largest Store on Earth?

This happened on two separate occasions. On one, I was buying a new iPod for my mother for Christmas; I ordered it online because I hadn't been able to find it in store; I was buying it from Wal-Mart because I had a Wal-Mart gift card I wanted to use toward the cost; I used site-to-store because I was home for the holidays and didn't want it sent to the house in case she or someone else opened it. On another, I was buying light fixtures that they did not have in their stores and that were noticeably cheaper than comparable ones at Lowes/Home Depot and I didn't have them shipped to me because that costs money and I'm cheap/ain't nobody got time for that.
15  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: Battle of the Latin American Countries, Round 2 on: September 29, 2014, 07:18:32 pm
Haiti is a Latin American country?
16  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: Worst County in the Country? Explain why? on: September 29, 2014, 05:52:14 pm
Basically those counties with "cities" that are basically giant trailer parks surrounding Walmart Super Centers and old small 1990s Walmarts converted to megachurches.

places like-

El Paso, CO
Maricopa, AZ


Yes, let's turn it all into Whole Foods and LEED-certified urban lifestyle lofts. 90% of the current residents will no longer be able to afford to live there, but that's their problem.
17  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: Worst County in the Country? Explain why? on: September 29, 2014, 05:51:14 pm
Montgomery County, TX deserves a mention. What a suburban right-wing hellhole.

At least it's 20% Hispanic, so there will probably be decently-priced good food available. 

There isn't. If you want to have dinner in The Woodlands, you're going to be going to The Cheesecake Factory, Tommy Bahama, PF Chang's or one of those other overhyped chain places. And have fun parallel parking your car on Market Street between the yellow Hummer H2 with the "NOBAMA" stickers and the Porsche Cayenne that some soccer mom valeted.
18  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 29, 2014, 05:31:52 pm
Jeff, if you do end up in this position, please do your store's customers a favor and make sure that someone is actually at the Site-to-Store pickup counter or designate someone whose job it is to check every so often and see if someone's there.

Every time I have ever ordered something for in-store pickup, (1) there is no one at the counter, (2) the little "Touch the Screen to Alert an Associate" screen never works, (3) an endless stream of employees comes in and out of the restrooms and breakrooms right next door and no one ever asks me if I need help despite the fact that I am a non-employee standing at a counter that no employees are attending.

It's extremely irritating and it ends up taking an absurd amount of time to get what I ordered.
19  Other Elections - Analysis and Discussion / Congressional Elections / Re: Democrats - are you panicking right now? on: September 29, 2014, 05:06:50 pm
If it makes you feel better, a plausible scenario is a 51 R / 49 D Senate. The result of that is basically just gridlock - the Democrats will be able to find at least 2 Republicans to vote with them on anything terribly crazy the House GOP sends over, especially considering how many of them are going to be running for reelection in purple/blue states in 2016.
20  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 29, 2014, 05:01:05 pm
this wal mart chat is pretty boring.  though i was delighted to learn that one is supposed to report even the mention of the word 'union.'  it really is a great company.

anyway, bushie,  *DO NOT QUIT* tomorrow.  go in and face the music.  if you get fired (which is 99% likely). so be it.  but dont quit.

Walter, you don't have to go blue... But at least give green some thought.
I remember back in the day, Walter was an R-MA. He's under some sort of delusion that there can be mass prosperity (and by mass, I don't just mean the quarter of people who are legit professionals) without unions. A true believer.

Isn't he some kind of a blue collar worker himself though?
21  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 28, 2014, 11:05:06 pm
It wouldn't surprise me if politicians started holding campaign rallies in Wal-Mart parking lots.

This would be great because it would inevitably cause a hilarious calamity

Walmart vigorously prohibits anything from ever happening in their parking lots except for A) parking and B) things that are specifically and explicitly approved by the store manager in advance. This strict rule lets them shoo away union stuff at the first hint of trouble and keeps potential picket lines on the far side of those giantass parking lots, except with enough vagueness that they can't claim it's specifically to target unions.

There's a 24/7 "labor relations" hotline that a store is supposed to call when anything union related happens (my computer training told me it should be called like literally any time I ever heard someone say the word "union" on the premises).

If a campaign event was happening but the shift manager forgot it had been scheduled, then saw the campaign placards from a distance and mistook them for picket signs, then it's entirely plausible State Senator whats-his-face would find his campaign event being forcibly broken up by modern-day Pinkertons

What would happen if I showed up and paraded around the store waving red banners and singing "The Internationale" at the top of my lungs?
22  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 28, 2014, 09:23:19 pm
If BK is willing to put his own reputation on the line by offering Jeff up as a referral, I'd say Jeff would be crazy not to jump on this ASAP.
23  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 28, 2014, 08:40:48 pm
Here's an example: http://www.prismresearchinc.com/about-us/studies/#/?study=study1415

It requires basically to be locked in on site for over a week, but after that just 9 1-2 hour visits, and it pays almost $3000!

But of course Bushie wouldn't meet the BMI requirements. Didn't consider that. Of course I'm sure there's plenty of studies requiring obese subjects.

You want to pump Jeff full of untested pharmaceuticals?! Are you trying to kill him?!
24  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: My Friend Took a Selfie With the Coptic Orthodox Pope on: September 28, 2014, 07:27:28 pm
I admit, if I didn't see the title I would've thought they were Muslims or possibly Sikhs.

Brown people with beards aren't allowed to be Christian.
25  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update) on: September 28, 2014, 07:11:24 pm
Maybe we're going in the wrong direction here. None of these job ideas seem to be working, minimum wage grunt work is beneath Bushie and going on disability probably is too.

That leaves an option that many men in his situation have pursued: find a reasonably industrious woman who is stably employed and also suffers from low self-esteem; convince her she needs you and you're the best thing that ever happened to her even though you're a broke, overweight, unemployed schmuck, and let her go out and bring home the bacon while you sit around the house all day doing whatever the hell you want. Dump some of your seed in her, make her have a kid by you and you two will officially be irreversibly entangled.

Poor black and white men with few skills or ambitions all across the country have gotten the steady income and roof over their head that they need by becoming Common-Law Husbands/Baby Daddies to women who deserve better but lack the self-respect to actually dump those losers and find someone else.

Jeff would do well to find a woman who is a nurse's aide or has some other comparable stable, working class job, who came from a broken home and has daddy issues. They tend to set their standards lower than they should and the fact that Jeff has no priors and doesn't use weed/meth/etc already puts him at the top of the heap. She'll pay the rent, cook and clean while you sit around all day. 'Tis the white trash way of doing things.
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