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1676  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: 1913 Confederate Presidential Election on: June 25, 2014, 02:12:27 pm

Bubba Comer I guess.

What did you expect when a President elected with less than a quarter of the vote decides to send federal troops into the South?

I'm debating between Blease, Watson, Simmons, and Bilbo myself.
1677  General Politics / Individual Politics / 1913 Confederate Presidential Election on: June 25, 2014, 01:59:28 pm
(All of the candidates are former-Populists because  you, that's why. They don't technically have any political parties though. They're also all crazy racist unless otherwise stated.)

The election of 1912 was one of the most controversial in US history, with third-place finisher Oscar Underwood taking advantage of the FLP’s old majorities to claw through two rounds of congressional voting despite taking under a quarter of the popular vote, and many would not stand for this. The first serious rumblings of anti-Underwood sentiment came from the Populist-dominated South, where the members of said party had walked out on the House vote in a nice show of solidarity that did little but helping Underwood win some Southern states, but tensions were brought to a high when Underwood’s massive expansion of the Reed Brigade came into effect, sweeping through the South to destroy the Ku Klux Klan once and for all. While Underwood did enjoy some temporary success with his efforts (his proudest achievement being the arrest and imprisonment of the mob that killed Jewish factory manager Leo Frank, which included several prominent Georgians), no one could have imagined the backlash that was to come. Tensions rose throughout his presidency and boiled over when, on July 4, 1913, an event occurred that came to be known as the Stone Mountain Massacre: a battalion of Reed Brigade troops attempted to disperse a massive Klan ritual ceremony, and the Klansmen responded with violence; in the ensuing chaos, seventeen Klansmen (including Congressman James F. Byrnes) and three National Guardsmen were killed, and the South decided she could not take it anymore. Declaring “an end to the tyranny of the usurper in Washington”, Tom Watson led the charge for secession, with Georgia becoming the first state of the new Confederacy of American States; many other states of the old Confederacy followed suit as well as a few more just for kicks. Underwood has promised to "bring the traitorous scum to heel", but the Confederates aren't listening. But now, alas, comes the post-celebration hassle of electing a leader, a spiritual successor of sorts to John Tyler but hopefully more effective at actually running things.

The eight men who have presented themselves before the hastily-chosen Confederate Congress for a chance to live in infamy in all future APUSH textbooks are as follows. Watson, the original architect of secession, is the clear frontrunner, having been the founder of the Populist Party and one of the first to call for impeachment of Underwood (the cries for impeachment died down significantly after 99% of the Southern delegation decided to take their ball and go home), and also having had some handy executive experience in his two years as Georgia Governor. Behind him is the least legitimate President in the history of the nation, Marion Butler, who is pretty much by definition the highest official to endorse the Confederacy, as well as Butler's fellow Tarheeler Furnifold Simmons, nicknamed King Furnifold I for his grip on the state's political machine; Simmons was a great enemy of Zebulon Vance back when the latter was governor.

Down deeper into the South we find a due of Mississippi Governors: lynch-happy Jim Vardaman, an also-ran in the Populist primary a while back, and rising star Theodore Bilbo, who is noted for his rather eccentric personality (he prefers to refer to himself in the third person) and the fact that he's so racist he literally wrote a book about how black people are taking over America. Rounding out the candidates are the not-as-racist-as-the-others Joseph F. Johnston, who is running as the voice of moderation in the field, the wealthy Braxton Bragg Comer, who owns a ton of businesses and is named after a little-known Confederate army officer who was hanged in 1840, and finally Coleman L. Blease, who hates Coca-Cola almost as much as he hates black people.

You have three days. Vote, my pretties, vote!
1678  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: 1912 House Vote Round Two on: June 25, 2014, 10:06:49 am
Two-hours-left bump.
1679  Atlas Fantasy Elections / Atlas Fantasy Government / Re: SENATE BILL: Demilitarization Act of 2014 (Amendment at Vote) on: June 25, 2014, 10:05:15 am
Changing vote to Nay.
1680  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Five and a half years from now. on: June 23, 2014, 08:37:33 pm
It's OK Jerry I support your dreams.
1681  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: Opinion of John Brown on: June 23, 2014, 07:18:44 pm
I'm not sure y'all realize this, but the people John Brown fought against literally owned other people.

The American slave system was one of the worst programs of actions in history, and I'm perfectly fine with using violence against the perpetrators of that system and those who fought to keep it in place.
1682  Atlas Fantasy Elections / Atlas Fantasy Government / Re: SENATE BILL: Demilitarization Act of 2014 (Amendment at Vote) on: June 23, 2014, 07:12:51 pm
1683  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: Opinion of former Libertarian Atlasians on: June 23, 2014, 06:22:33 pm
If by "former Libertarian Atlasians" you mean "20RP12", HP.
1684  Atlas Fantasy Elections / Atlas Fantasy Government / Re: SENATE BILL: Demilitarization Act of 2014 (Debating) on: June 23, 2014, 02:30:15 pm
Really, TNF? I'm not that big a fan of conscription, and I know you aren't either. I say we just abolish the whole thing.

Iobject to the amendment, if that is permitted.
1685  Atlas Fantasy Elections / Atlas Fantasy Elections / Re: Windjammer senators vote ratings on: June 23, 2014, 02:25:41 pm
I like this...
1686  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: 1912 House Vote Round Two on: June 23, 2014, 05:50:18 am
1687  Forum Community / Off-topic Board / Re: What makes you Angry :( ? on: June 22, 2014, 08:57:57 pm
Shouldn't you be letting go of earthly attachments?
1688  Forum Community / Forum Community / Re: The Bacon King Institute of Comedy on: June 22, 2014, 04:39:38 pm
Harry I know about the whole standards of living, but it comes at the cost of freedom. See maybe our differing political views just don't jive with our views on what we consider freedom.

I believe in majority rules, in free trade, free enterprise, freedom of speech. What always made the United States a great country was that we were the opposite of the rest of the world.

While Hitler banned smoking and created vast totalitarian order in Europe, Americans were smoking cigarettes and drinkin' Tennessee whiskey.

While the Japanese and Germans had brutal concentration or death camps, the camp we had for Japanese Americans didn't include sick torture, abuse or extermination.

An Axis war leader once said, "I'd never want to invade the United States, because there would be a gun in the back of every soldier." The Jews didn't have weapons. Resistance groups failed. America was FOUNDED on a resistance victory against Britain.

We got rid of Europe here a long time ago for the specific purpose of not being Europe. Dare I say, that most Americans, even our leaders in the 1940s, thought more like ME than like you. By thinking like me, we won.

What if our WWII leaders thought like you? I don't believe victory could have been assured. That is why I'm such a pain in the butt about being against liberalism. I think it threatens us.

oh my god this is the best

I especially love how he took an effort to type an apostrophe instead of a g in the bolded part. People like that always make me laugh.
1689  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: 1912 House Vote Round Two on: June 22, 2014, 04:24:59 pm

I wonder how much backlash there would be from the public with the victor being the guy who came in third in the popular vote.

And less than a quarter to boot, but no one cares because muh FLP.
1690  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: Top Three Best and Worst Governors, Senators, and Congressmen on: June 22, 2014, 01:45:57 pm
Quick question: Why all the Dan Malloy love from the left here? I'd certainly put Dayton above him.
1691  Atlas Fantasy Elections / Atlas Fantasy Government / Re: SENATE BILL: Stabilize Crypto-Currency Markets Act of 2014 (At Final Vote) on: June 22, 2014, 01:25:50 pm
1692  Atlas Fantasy Elections / Atlas Fantasy Government / Re: SENATE BILL: The Bicameral Birthing Amendment of 2014 (Debating) on: June 22, 2014, 01:25:15 pm
Can't we just have the system that means that the parties hold whatever sort of primary they want and rank the candidates that way? I think it should be up to the voters of each party to determine how they want to rank their people.
1693  General Politics / Individual Politics / 1912 House Vote Round Two on: June 22, 2014, 12:40:02 pm
Despite the BMP's strong showing in the congressional elections, the House vote occurred before their swearing-in, and La Follette was forced to graciously bow out and throw his support behind Underwood. His running mate, Hiram Johnson, had rather more success as the Farmers-Laborers and Bull-Meese united behind him (Oscar Underwood even cast the first vote for him in the election) to stop a Union-Populist united front. Now the House vote is down to two - just like the good old days! - with rising star Oscar Underwood squaring off against that old enemy Henry Cabot Lodge, who would rather not like to join Henry Adams in the "Two-Time Failures Named Henry Club". I assume you folks know their positions, so you've got three days to decide the fate of the nation for centuries to come at least four years.
1694  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: 1912 House and Senate Vote on: June 22, 2014, 10:02:01 am
Just a few hours left on this thing.
1695  General Politics / U.S. General Discussion / Re: Should the Washington Redskins change their name? on: June 21, 2014, 09:30:18 pm
What about the Minnesota Vikings?  Their name and logo could be construed as offensive to Scandinavians.

The difference between the Vikings and the Celtics on the one hand, and the Redskins on the other, is that the Vikings and Celtics are home teams of large Scandinavian and Irish communities, so were chosen to represent those communities with pride.

In the case of the Redskins, it was plucking a completely different nation's identity, choosing an offensive term, and using it as a mascot.

EDIT: What about the Kansas City Chiefs, for that matter?

That's problematic as well.
So Native Americans are a different nation from other Americans?

That is what they call themselves - Seneca Nation, Cherokee Nation, etc.
1696  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: "Where've You Gone, General Washington?" - Participatory Election Series on: June 21, 2014, 09:24:06 pm
Also, can we have alternate universe Doris Kearns Goodwin write The Bully Pulpit about Joseph Cannon and Henry Cabot Lodge?
1697  General Politics / Individual Politics / Re: "Where've You Gone, General Washington?" - Participatory Election Series on: June 21, 2014, 09:23:03 pm
1698  Atlas Fantasy Elections / Atlas Fantasy Government / Re: SENATE BILL: The Public means Public Act (At Final Vote) on: June 21, 2014, 01:12:21 pm
1699  Forum Community / Off-topic Board / Re: Crystal Math XV: π vs. τ on: June 21, 2014, 12:49:47 pm
I actually know tau to more decimal places than pi, almost entirely due to Vi Hart's song.
1700  General Politics / U.S. General Discussion / Re: Should the Washington Redskins change their name? on: June 21, 2014, 12:09:58 pm
How does it punish you to rename a football team?

Because it would be giving into the politically correct lovers.

Show me on the doll where political correctness touched you.
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