Update XX: A Darn Good Judge of My Financial Situation

[J-Mann]

How was your dinner Bushie?  Did you have scrambled eggs as planned?

I live in Tulsa to be close to my parents, but far enough that they don't feel the urge to invite themselves over everyday.  I am free to be my own person by living 2 hours away.

Ah, so the truth comes out.  You're afraid that your parents smother you too much, and don't want them to "feel the urge to invite themselves over everyday".  This seems to be of a piece your moving back to Oklahoma from Utah because your father told you to, and showing up for all those family dinners because your parents expected it of you.

You don't want the people who are supporting you to be around all that much!?

I know you're eating in tonight, but you've been eating out a lot. Out of curiosity, who is paying for those meals, and is there an agreed-upon daily limit while you're looking for work?

[J-Mann]

How was your dinner Bushie?  Did you have scrambled eggs as planned?

I live in Tulsa to be close to my parents, but far enough that they don't feel the urge to invite themselves over everyday.  I am free to be my own person by living 2 hours away.

Ah, so the truth comes out.  You're afraid that your parents smother you too much, and don't want them to "feel the urge to invite themselves over everyday".  This seems to be of a piece your moving back to Oklahoma from Utah because your father told you to, and showing up for all those family dinners because your parents expected it of you.

You don't want the people who are supporting you to be around all that much!?

I know you're eating in tonight, but you've been eating out a lot. Out of curiosity, who is paying for those meals, and is there an agreed-upon daily limit while you're looking for work?

[J-Mann]

I have not had any water today.  Conversation stops there.  I don't feel like being yelled at over not drinking water today.

I don't think anyone's yelling. They're encouraging you to stay hydrated because illness of the tyoe you describe dehydrates people. It's a good way to keep hydrated and flush your system. The frustration comes from an active avoidance of the most basic and universal medical advice.

[J-Mann]

If God can take away flu symptoms if he wants, then the question becomes, why doesn't He want to take away Bushie's? Has Bushie angered Him? Wait... you guys don't think... oh god no, Bushie have you briefly relaxed lately?!

Maybe He wants to teach me a lesson?  Most of the time, He doesn't take illnesses away on our timing, but His timing is perfect and there is always a reason to the suffering.  Although, I believe God is taking away my symptoms tonight.  I'm not near as miserable as I was about 4-6 hours ago.

Could it be that the exceptionally complex biological processes governing your body and possibly dictated by a creator who put the wheels in motion billions of years ago could see you through on their own (ie: your body weathers the illness on its own but thanks to its design) and that, in effect, is "God taking away the illness?"

I'm just asking if you're a believer in the science-y God who designed you to survive if you've taken care of your "temple," or the wizard-y God who waves magic wands and makes you all better.

[J-Mann]

I'll absolutely agree to that. You know I respect you. To quote The Office, "You're a wonderful woman...and you're a helluva bowler!"

That said, do me a favor and have a drink of water. You were complaining about the heat earlier on Facebook. Maybe you can cool down with a glass of ice water.

Wait. Was I not supposed to bring up Facebook here at all?

You're fine, Phil, because I mentioned it on here, also.     After I finish this can of Diet Dr. Pepper, I'll have a glass of water.

Sweet influenza Jesus.

20:00 Update:  I am feeling quite a bit better.  The temperature is just fine with the fan on.  All of the achiness has come down to a sore lower right back and a Grade 6 headache.  The rest of the muscles are just stiff, but the Tylenol I took about 4 1/2 hours ago has really helped.  I was also able to eat 1 3/4 hot dogs.  I couldn't quite finish two full hot dogs, but I got 1 3/4 down.  That's less than my typical 3 hot dogs.

I'll be honest -- if I eat hotdogs for dinner, I have six. Usually covered in chili, sauerkraut or cole slaw. Slaw dogs are the best!

[J-Mann]

My hot dogs are always very plain with just mustard and occasionally cheese.

If you're going to eat hotdogs, you ought to try some variations. Brats with sauerkraut, dogs with chili and onions ... and trust me, creamy cole slaw on a hotdog is the BEST [way to eat a hotdog if you must].

[J-Mann]

Sorry for being later on the response. Ya know ... work, and life, and such ...

Anyway, the two companies seem legit. I echo everything Smash said about them. Even though you're unemployed, do try to be a tad discriminating, Jeff. Keep your previous experiences in mind and remember how difficult things can be at a smaller company if you don't "get it" or require some hand-holding.

And ask lots of questions about the specific nature of the job. Ask them to describe a typical day or week. Ask them for 30-60-90-day goals. Ask them what the training / onboarding is like. Particularly at the smaller company, you wouldn't want to wind up in a situation where they have you wearing multiple hats that you don't want to put on.

Mechaman -- great to see you back!

Mecha asked some really great questions, Jeff. Your response was typical -- a non-answer and an "I'll think about it." You don't owe anyone any answers, but if the questions were so good, you really ought to take them to heart. Some people truly are directionless in life, and you may be one of those people -- and if that's the case, it'd do you good to listen to those you trust who give you honest and critical feedback (not those who spoon-feed you answers you want to hear, no matter how nice and comforting they may be).

Whatever the future holds in terms of employment, your health, etc., it's time to DO. It's time to act. No more planning to plan. No more thinking about maybe thinking about ... DO. As much as so many of us would like to slap you silly and set you on a right path, you're the only one who can ultimately do that.

So DO!

does your church dismiss science and godless scientists?

We believe the Bible as infallible and inerrant. Everything that happened in Genesis during creation actually happened on earth.  That's how our universe and our world came to being.  Not from a stupid and idiotic big bang theory.

I know you're "done" answering religion questions, but this one is legit ... how do literalists such as yourself reconcile that Genesis 1:x and Genesis 2:x are literally two different versions of the same story where the events unfold differently? Which one is right?

[J-Mann]

What did you have for dinner tonight?

I had a small hamburger from McDonald's about 1400, no fries, and nothing since.

You had dinner at 2pm?!?

So tomorrow night will be the spaghetti?

I considered it a late lunch, but still wanted to eat light because the stomach bug hasn't completely gotten out of my system, yet.

Tomorrow is Friday night.  It's a weekend.  Because of the big, I still won't pig out, but I'll eat what I want to.  Spaghetti will wait until
Monday.

Has anyone else connected the dots to realize that Jeff would probably support the annual purge from The Purge?

[J-Mann]

2, 3, 4, and 5 are good. 1 is still too vague. What are you going to eat at home?

Where you eat something is not what makes something unhealthy. I'm pretty sure I can eat healthier going to McDonalds every day than you could eating at home. You have to make healthier choices. You need to eat vegetables. Every day. Even if they are slopped in butter and cheese.

I'll incorporate more vegetables and lean meats.  I may have an occasional frozen burrito or two, but I'm going to try to work in more vegetables, lean meats, and fresh fruit.

See, you aren't serious. You're already looking for ways to renege on your goals. Your goals need to be

1. I'll eat more vegetables. (Period)
2. I'll drink more water. (Period)
3. I'll walk 20 minutes a day. (Period)


No, "I may occasionally blah blah blah"

You cannot say I am not serious by anything I said.  Everybody should have a cheat meal every now and then.

Yes, just like rehabilitated sex offenders deserve the occasional boob-squeeze without society getting all judgemental.

Jeff, just stop this talk. You aren't going to make any changes. You quite simply don't have the willpower. Never have. Never will. Go back and read the Update seasons sometime and count the weight of your empty promises.

Sorry to be a downer, dude, but it ain't worth the effort anymore. You're incapable of real, substantive change.

[J-Mann]

I hear all the doubts that have been posted, but I'm not going to listen to the doubters.  I am a man on a mission to healthier living.  I look forward to getting out and taking a brief walk today after the interview.  It will be a very nice day to do so.

Believe it or not, we've heard this before, too. I've been one of your biggest supporters, Jeff, but you'll be back to daily "cheat meals" and excuses by the weekend.

Oh wait. We're already there.

[J-Mann]

Good grief, guys.  I didn't have anything to eat at the house and I still wanted to eat light.  The diet is not dead.

It didn't die. It was stillborn.

[J-Mann]

It is midnight Saturday morning.  I have exactly 24 hours and ticking until my diet officially begins.

You keep saying "I will," over and over, just as you have for literally years. You can't and wont, Jeff. And even if you make some half-hearted attempt for a few days, you'll give up. It's not in your makeup to be successful. You're already making excuses, since you realize you have the body of a [morbidly obese] 80-year-old but are holding off on starting to make change until some arbitrary date hits.

Focus your energy on something you may actually be able to do: find a job and pray that it has health insurance that's worth a [Braums].

[J-Mann]

I don't like saying people can't change.  I am proof they can.  I was  hopeless alcoholic, now I've been sober over 6 years.

But it took a *complete lifestyle change*.  Bushie seems unwilling to change his life... with his cheat days and his aversion to doing basic things like drinking water and taking a walk.

How many cheat days do you give yourself, Ray?

[J-Mann]

I just walked down to the apartment laundry facility which is 1/4 mile from my door, put my clothes in the dryer, then walked back.  This is 1/2 mile in about 9-10 minutes.  I'll do another half mile in a couple or three hours.

Again, it's not a big walk, but it's definitely a good start and I don't think anyone would discount that.

I'm pretty sure you're fudging the numbers but congratulations anyway

Nothing here is to be congratulated. I used to do that with Jeff -- recognize even the smallest of victories -- and it was always misinterpreted as a reason to kick back with a day off from exercise, or a Braum's meal, or a day of napping. One step forward, one step back ... always.

If he's able to keep up this level of activity for a month ... then pat him on the back. Until then, any congratulations will only be used days from now as a reason for a cheat day: "I'm doing everything right, you guys said so. And now I deserve a reward."

[J-Mann]

So was going to the Golden Trough a bachelor party of sorts? A Mardi Gras bacchanalia before the long Lent?

Are you kidding me? He'll be having "bachelor parties" several times a week ... starting tomorrow!

[J-Mann]

I honestly feel bad for you, Jeff. The history as to why you are how you are has put you in a tough spot. You've grown up in an environment that never discouraged you from being unhealthy and never encouraged a healthy lifestyle. If this were 1915, you'd be as thin as a rail, because only the wealthy could afford to be truly fat. Today, thanks to bargain-basement crap and fast food, the economically challenged are the fattest, with only the wealthy able to access the type of personal training that helps overcome willpower challenges when it comes to fighting an addiction.

Now you're in an endless cycle -- fat and unhealthy because you're unemployed, and unemployed because you're fat and unhealthy. At least that's part of the equation.

History, culture and economic pressures aside, you CAN fix this. You just have to have the follow-through and not be so dumb as to backslide as soon as you get started. But you lack that willpower. Feel free to read through some Update seasons to learn meal plans and menus, exercise advice and more. It's all there. You never have followed any of it, and you never will.

We will be having this exact same conversation in 2020, and 2025, and 2030 ... if you live that long.

To overcome your past, YOU have to make the change. You have to be committed. No cheats, no "family dinner" excuses. Commit and follow through. If you ever did something long enough to see real change, you would love it and stick with it. You never do.

EDIT: By the way, Jeff -- I also know the script for your reply that comes next. No acceptance of your challenge or admission that you need help to do this ... only pride. You'll tell me, "You don't know. This time you're wrong." That's always been your out, that no one here knows how this charade plays out. We do. We know you better than you know yourself, unfortunately. And I know you'll boast how this is the time that you do it -- this is the time that you show us all.

You never have, and you never will. Sorry, but that's truth slapping you in the face, chief (which would be hilarious to watch in super slow motion). You need help to get through this and you'd need to stick to the strict guidelines others lay out for you. You are too proud to do that.

[J-Mann]

Chili from scratch.  Browning the hamburger meat and adding in some chili seasoning and maybe a few spices.  I might throw in some other stuff like ranch style beans, diced tomatoes, tomato sauce, and cover it with a lid for a few minutes to let the ingredients cook together and blend nicely.  I make sure I have plenty of Fritos and shredded cheese to cool the chili down.

It's a simple recipe and I just put it in a cast iron skillet.

JESSE’S HABANERO HELLFIRE CHILI

Serves: 8

Ingredients:
1 pound of ground beef
1 pound of ground pork or sausage
Either 1/2 or 3/4 pound of bacon
6 jalapeno peppers, seeded and chopped
6 habanero peppers, seeded and chopped
8 Anaheim peppers, seeded and chopped
1 tablespoon crushed red pepper flakes
3 tablespoons chili powder
1 ounce Thai garlic chile paste (found in the Asian section of most larger grocery stores)
1 medium-sized yellow onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 and 1/2 tablespoons ground cumin
1 green bell pepper, diced
2 tablespoons beef bouillon granules
1 28 oz can crushed tomatoes
2 14.5 oz cans whole peeled tomatoes, drained
3 oz tomato paste
2 16 oz cans chili beans, drained
1 12 oz can of beer (Bud Light or equivalent … nothing too fruity or too dark!)
2 cups water

1. It’ll pay off to prep a lot of the ingredients ahead of time so you’re not scrambling to get the peppers chopped up while the meat is cooking. Split all of the peppers and take out the seeds. (You can leave the seeds in one or two peppers, but the more you leave in, the more unbearably hot it will be … it’s warm enough without the seeds!) Finely chop all the peppers, including the bell, and do the same for the onion and the garlic. Mix all the chopped ingredients into a bowl and add the red pepper flakes, chili powder, Thai garlic chile paste, cumin, bouillon granules, crushed tomatoes, whole tomatoes and the tomato paste. Mix all the ingredients together well and set the bowl aside — you’ll need it later!

2. Cooking everything in a large stock pot works best. Cook the bacon at a medium-high heat in the pot until it’s evenly brown; remove the bacon from the pot, let it drain on paper towels and set it aside for later, as well. Drain MOST of the bacon grease from the pot, but be sure to leave some at the bottom of the pot for flavor.

3. Brown the beef and pork in the pot over a medium-high heat.

4. Return to your large bowl of ingredients and put in the beer and the water. Mix well and then stir everything from the bowl into the meat in the pot. Reduce the heat to low and simmer for an hour, stirring every 10 or 15 minutes.

5. After an hour, add the drained chili beans to the pot and chop or crush the bacon and add it to the pot, too. Stir the contents of the pot together well and continue simmering for another 30 minutes.

As is, this recipe is very spicy. You can adjust the heat of the recipe by either removing peppers (particularly the habaneros) or leaving in more seeds. When refrigerated, the bacon grease left in the chili will turn orange and rise to the top of the chili; don’t remove it! Stir it in when reheating, as it adds a lot of flavor to the recipe.

Enjoy!

Oh … and wear gloves when handling the peppers. Trust me, rubbing your eyes or visiting the bathroom after handling habaneros without gloves is not recommended!

[J-Mann]

Bushie...walk 1 mile at least..thats normal walking pace for ~15 minutes.  Make it an hour and you've walked 3-4 miles.

I walk 20 minute miles, but I'm just not ready to keep it up for an entire hour.  Does nobody understand the need to work up to it?  Nobody who walks or runs a race starts out at the length required for the race.  They start out small and work up.

This is what I'm talking about -- never a willingness to take even the first step. A couple of laps around Walmart and you think you deserve a trophy, and no drive to ever push yourself beyond. I guarantee that in a month, you'll either be off the exercise train altogether, or saying how you're "working your way up."

[J-Mann]

Seriously, Bushie.  Is it about getting dressed up to go to work?  Is it pride?  Do you think you're above the service industry?

I don't see how someone could see themselves above the service industry and yet sign on to do sales in the year 2015. The salesman is a scumbag job.

Hey!!