Comedy Goldmine V: A Tribute to Delayed Sequels with Over-the-Hill Actors

[Kaine for Senate '18]

McCain gets to 270 with these states called already:

I'm sorry, you must have not been able to read the thread.  Should we translate it to French for your benefit?

DWDL, your map is extremely funny.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

The map we've all been waiting for:

I had a 51 state victory quite a while ago, in response to Mikey predicting it.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Allen's usage of the race issue allows him to gain many of Hillary Clinton's former voters and the Republicans win by a large margin.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Roger Wicker and a retarded monkey

Really? I don't see much of a resemblance between Wicker and Musgrove to be honest.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

No (R)

Look at the author.

I think he may have taken too much of a food that didn't agree with him. Or something.

I can assure you that, for now, I am a Republican.  I may end up as an Independent, but for the moment, I have left the Democratic Party.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

No (R)

Look at the author.

I think he may have taken too much of a food that didn't agree with him. Or something.

I can assure you that, for now, I am a Republican.  I may end up as an Independent, but for the moment, I have left the Democratic Party.

However clever you think you are, it's not funny.

I don't think I'm clever; I am quite serious.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

No (R)

Look at the author.

I think he may have taken too much of a food that didn't agree with him. Or something.

I can assure you that, for now, I am a Republican.  I may end up as an Independent, but for the moment, I have left the Democratic Party.

Why do people find it so hard to believe that I have left the Democratic Party, and, at the very least, become an Independent?

[Kaine for Senate '18]

No (R)

Look at the author.

I think he may have taken too much of a food that didn't agree with him. Or something.

I can assure you that, for now, I am a Republican.  I may end up as an Independent, but for the moment, I have left the Democratic Party.

Why do people find it so hard to believe that I have left the Democratic Party, and, at the very least, become an Independent?

Because of what you were saying about Obama and Hillary only two days ago?

I support Obama; does that mean I have to be a Democrat?

[Kaine for Senate '18]

I was sure Gore would win, because my parents supported him, and they were never wrong.  Boy, I was even more of a hack in 2000 then I am now

hard to believe that you could be a bigger hack than you are now.

..I chuckled some.

Sad thing is, he already did this:

I was sure Gore would win, because my parents supported him, and they were never wrong.  Boy, I was even more of a hack in 2000 then I am now

I cannot believe that you could be anymore hackish than you are now.

Of course I could; I could be you

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Ben, you don't want to bring that one up.

Why not?

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Ben, you don't want to bring that one up.

Why not?

Have you forgotten?

I clearly have.  There are a million things you could be talking about, and I'm tired.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

He's a more interesting story than John McCain.

We'll yeah.

USA Today

A Day in the Life of Being McCain

7:30 McCain wakes up
8:00 McCain eats donuts
8:10 McCain talks about how excited he was about eating donuts
8:15 McCain takes a nap
10:30 McCain wakes up from nap
11:00 McCain, forgetting that he just did so says that he's tired and wants to take a nap.
11:02 McCain takes another nap
11:30 McCain dreams about donuts with sprinkles
4:00 McCain wakes up
5:00 Press conference
6:00 Dinner
7:00 Nap
8:00 Snack - more donuts
9:00 McCain goes to bed

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Can a mod copy/paste gporter's entire post history into here please? Thanks in advance.

That wouldn't cover it, the PMs he sends me are Goldmine even moreso

Then post the PMs by all means. Or if you don't want to post forward to me please.

I'd like to second that.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Can a mod copy/paste gporter's entire post history into here please? Thanks in advance.

That wouldn't cover it, the PMs he sends me are Goldmine even moreso

Then post the PMs by all means. Or if you don't want to post forward to me please.

I'd like to second that.

PM's aren't allowed since they are private. I've already reported the post.

Darn.  I withdraw my request, then.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Porter paints Constine as an uncaring, partisan, liberal hack. Who would force government to be big in people's lives and who cared about himself more than he would about the country. Porter dismisses the foreign successes and gets the voters to look at Constine on a personal level. Constine fires back with criticisms and character debates against Porter. Porter gains some sympathy vote from Constine attacking Porter's mental issues that he has had since birth and for the fact that Constine never had anything nice to say about Porter. While Porter would occasionally praise Constine for his foreign affair experience.

After a campaign that goes down to the wire, Porter narrowly prevails on election night. The deciding states are Minnesota, Virgina, Florida, and Missouri. Virgina goes to Constine along with Florida. Minnesota goes to Porter. And Porter prevails by 300 votes out of 2.2 million cast in the state of Missouri and therefore wins the presidency.