We can now report that President Obama, Vice-President Biden, and every other Democratic elected official in the country have flown to Harrisburg to announce their resignation and permanent retirement from politics. One top Democratic strategist who wished to remain anonymous said that "after the Kane scandal, everyone just collectively decided to call it a day. I mean, given that it was basically the biggest scandal in American history and its unprecedented importance to voters throughout the country, we all sort of went 'why even bother anymore?''' The Democratic Party is expected to wait until Friday to formally dissolve in order to give Pennsylvania Democrats time to replace their platform with a resolution declaring that Tom Corbett shall henceforth be known as "Eternal Governor and Savior of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania."
It seems like your quoting some of your fellow red avatars on Bridgegate.