The Ilvie Picayune-Bee & Journal & Wire Service

[ilikeverin]

Wire

D1
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NYGOP (UAC-NY) 11
Defarge (D-NY) 12

D2
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Bono (R-NH) 7
Umengus (D-VT) 5

D3
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KucinichForPrez (G-MI) 1
MasterJedi (R-WI) 6
Nym90 (D-MI) 9

D4
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StatesRights (SRP-FL) 11
Write-in: Ronald Reagan (R-TX) 2

D5
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JFK (UAC-CA) 11
Write-in: Lewis Trondheim (UL-HI) 1
Write-in: Jesus (JCP-WA) 1

Don't ya worry, I didn't copy these results   If you do use them, reference [Ilvie].

Times-Picayune-Bee-Journal

The Picayune-Bee & Journal is pleased with the Districts 3 and 5 results, neutral on the district 1 results, and are unhappy with the District 2 and 4 results.  The PB&J is unhappy with the candidates in those elections, and expresses its regrets that no better candidates offered their candidacy.

[ilikeverin]

Good one!

[ilikeverin]

PB&J

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[ilikeverin]

Freedom of Speech vs. Freedom of the Press
General Secretary Al, Time Magazine, VP-Elect Keystone Phil, Secretary of State Hermit locked in bitter, confusing battle

I'M NOT ENTIRELY SURE, ATLASIA- Fresh off a surprisingly good showing in last weekend's election, General Secretary Al is already finding himself in a fight with the current and future administration.

The trouble started when the Time Magazine released its supposed person of the year.  This was at the behest of one Ronald Reagan, the perennial Republican runner-up.

But Al could not accept this.  'I hearby [sic] ban Time Magazine from this state until it quites [sic] being an ultra-partisan AF GOP rag.'

However, Hermit found fault with this, and published an editorial, by himself, blasting Al's decision.  Quote, 'One of the most basic tenets of Atlasian society came under attack in West Virginia today, as self-proclaimed “Mayor” Al banned Time Magazine...the magazine featured newly-elected Paul Brunsel as Person of the Year.'  The editorial quotes Vice-President Elect Keystone Phil as saying, 'He lost an election and wants to attack those who had no ill will towards him, his union movement or his campaign for President...I always respected Al even when I disagreed with him. After seeing what I've seen today, my opinion has changed.'

Al blasted back, accusing Secretary of State Hermit of libel, quoting such lines as, 'One has to wonder, who is Al’s leftist role model? Marx? Lenin? At this point, the likeliest candidate seems to be Stalin.' and 'We can not let this aggression against our sacred freedoms stand.'  The situation was further escalated by the publishing of the article in the newly founded National Atlasian.  One can only wonder where this situation will lead next.

[ilikeverin]

The Ilvie Picayune-Bee & Journal is pleased to announce the following endorsement for the upcoming District 2 (or is it 1? :S) special election (barring any unforseen additional candidates):

1) Siege40
2) Mas117
3) Badnarikin04

[ilikeverin]

The Ilvie PB&J releases the following endorsements:

District 1: Well, they're both very good; that's why I'm not endorsing anyone!  So I endorse going out to vote, no matter who you vote for
District 2: Siege40 is the obvious choice here.
District 3: Al (D-WV) over Texasgurl (R-WI) (sorry, couldn't resist)
District 4: Both candidaes are so-so, but we endorse... uhh... n/m.  No endorsement.  I can't decide
District 5: Gabu

[ilikeverin]

The Ilvie PB&J releases the following endorsements:

District 1: Well, they're both very good; that's why I'm not endorsing anyone!  So I endorse going out to vote, no matter who you vote for
District 2: Siege40 is the obvious choice here.
District 3: Al (D-WV) over Texasgurl (R-WI) (sorry, couldn't resist)
District 4: Both candidaes are so-so, but we endorse... uhh... n/m.  No endorsement.  I can't decide
District 5: Gabu

Problem is Texasgurl isn't a Republican.

Well, she certainly acts like it

You must be logged in to read this quote.

Hmm, I just read who sponsored the Marijuana Legalization Bill.

I endorse Supersoulty in D1

[ilikeverin]

District 2: Siege40 is the obvious choice here.

Thanks... is it good to be obvious?

Siege

In this case, why yes, it is