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Author Topic: Westman Timeline Pt. I  (Read 75943 times)
Mechaman
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« Reply #900 on: April 15, 2012, 09:59:33 am »
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I just read the entire TL.
Just. Brilliant.

You read the whole thing?

Damn.......
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Mechaman
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« Reply #901 on: April 15, 2012, 10:49:58 am »
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November 20th, 1986
Davenport Regional
Davenport, Iowa
6:30 PM Central Standard Time:


Doc Wallace walks into the emergency room and looks at the middle aged woman before him.  Her eyes were wide open, staring into nothingness.
Anna Dianne Goldberg, aged 44, had just died.
His head is downcast as he closes the bedsheet over her head as her husband, David Goldberg looks on.
Wallace: I'm truly sorry David.
David Goldberg, whose sadness was too great for even tears, nodded.
Goldberg: You did everything you could Doc.  She would've wanted to go out this way.
Doc Wallace looks at him perplexedly.
Wallace: In a plane crash?
Goldberg lets out a mood breaking chuckle.
Goldberg: No, I mean while promoting the greater good.  I told her that the campaign trail wouldn't be interesting for her.  But (sniffles) she insisted on going anyway to help us in the state.
Wallace takes off his gloves and throws them in the trashcan.
Damn it Doc!  Why didn't you just focus on Walters?  He probably could've recovered by now if you didn't focus on this hopeless case.
A tear falls out of Wallace's right eye.
Because it was the right thing to do, damn Scott Westman's money.

Thirty Minutes Later:
Wallace is on the hospital phone with Scott Westman.
Westman: I'm sorry Doc.
Wallace: Yeah yeah whatever, there is a reason why docs like me have high casualty rates.
Westman: Don't be so hard on yourself.  You said that Walters had stabilized right?
Wallace: Yeah it's weird like I got there and he wasn't on the brink like he was a day ago.  There are some operations that still need to be done, namely to remove the shrapnel from his chest and his head and *gulp* a removal of the lower left leg but other than that he's okay.
Westman: So pretty much he'll be wheelchair bound for life?
Wallace: Depends, some of these cheap bastards may just give him a pair of crutches and tell him to walk home or some sh*t.  That's at least what they did to me when I broke my leg running track in high school.  Bastards.
Westman: Alright good.
Wallace: Listen Scott, I got some bad news.
Westman: Oh, yeah?
Wallace: While I did save the Senator's life his condition isn't all that solid.
Westman: Half his closest friends died in a plane wreck, naturally he'll be scarred for life.
Wallace: No, you don't understand.  His wife is dead.
Westman: Yeah, and....?
Wallace:....his damned brother was inconsolable over Mary's death.  He was her f***ing brother-inlaw.  He's been nonstop crying for a whole day pretty much.  You would've thought that the Senator died.  Think how badly it will affect David Walters, who is now crippled for life and will have to breathe through a machine for the rest of his days?  By the way did I mention how much this breathing machine is going to cost you per month?
Westman: How much?
Wallace: $212,900.
Wallace heres something drop on the other end.
Westman: No seriously bro, how much?
Wallace laughs.
Westman: Dude, not funny.
Wallace: Alright, it'll cost you $78,952.
Westman: Jeez, I probably paid half that much for Brea's college education.
Wallace: Shut up!  That's probably less the amount of jewelry you bought her.  One would think she was your girlfriend.
Westman chuckles.
Westman: Hell, I probably spent more on evening gowns for her than I did a college education.  Sh*t, let's get me signed up here.  Besides, she's prettier than most of me former girlfriends.
Wallace laughs.
Wallace: Thank you Governor, for the money and the amount of blackmail material I got just in case you decide not to pony up.
Westman: Oh don't you worry about that lad!  The money will be in the trunk of the limo.
Wallace: Don't call me "lad" man.  I'm like older than you kid.
Westman: Yeah but not by much.  I'm 41.
Wallace: No way!  With that fiery hair?
Westman: Politics is the profession of the youthful my friend.
Wallace: And scoring Caroline?  Young little hot number she is?
Westman: Yes, she'll be the most spoiled college graduate ever.  How many women can say they became First Lady of a state at the age of 27?
Wallace: Damn man, she's a child.  Like seriously, she's old enough to be Brea's older sister.
Westman: Well, you know that's what happens when you don't use protection while you're a teenager.  And if it weren't for men who're insecure about their penis sizes maybe Caroline wouldn't be my First Lady...............
Wallace: Oh god Scott, I'm sorry.
Westman: Nah man, it's good.  You see, this is kind of hard for me to say but I didn't really love Catalina that much.  I mean I always wanted to believe I did, because hell she gave birth to me daughter, and we were married or what not.  But, it just never felt like the connection I had with my sister and my daughter.  Whoa!  Whoa!  Let me backtrack there!  I'm not saying that I had the same kind of love for my sister and my daughter as I did for my wife, but that it felt a lot more powerful emotionally and mentally than the one I had for my wife.  It's just-
Wallace: Westman:[/b] Governor, have you been drinking again?
Westman: Abub!
Wallace: Right.  Anyway, not to be rude, but by the time you finish this conversation everybody in this hospital would have died from a nuclear holocaust.  SO yeah, I need to go.  If you need someone to talk to go see Shannon at the gun range.  After all, it's easier to talk to women you sleep with than the doctor who you pay $200,000 to operate on a guy you barely know.
Wallace hangs up the phone.
Damn it, somebody get that guy a f***ing counselor or something.
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Mechaman
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« Reply #902 on: April 15, 2012, 11:58:50 am »
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Thirty Seconds Later:

The phone rings again.
Doc Wallace, being closest to the phone, answers it.
Wallace: Hello?
Westman: Doc!  DOC!  WHAT THE HELL!?
Wallace: Listen man, I'm a f***ing surgeon not a psychologist.
Westman: Alright sh*t whatever.  ANyway, what were you saying about David Walter's condition?
Wallace: Oh yes.  Even if he recovers there is a possibility he might go into shock due to the discovery that his wife is dead.  So yeah, he might end up dying after all from the horror of the situation.
Westman: Well then, keep him on drugs!
Wallace: Oh yeah, that might work.  We just don't want him to become to chemically dependent on them though, or he could abuse the drugs to escape the pain of loss.  And even at that Scott, there's the fact that his motor skills won't ever be what they used to be.
Westman: Come again?
Wallace: A piece of shrapnel was found lodged in his vocal chords.  Along with the likely heavy mental damage that means he probably will likely never go back into politics ever again.
Westman: SONUVABITCH!
Wallace: I know, it sucks.  That means he, unless by some Jesus Christ miracle, isn't running for re-election or any election anytime soon.
Back in Montana Scott Westman breaks a pencil in half.
Westman: You f***in me Doc?
Wallace: No sir?
Westman: You f***in f***in me George?
Wallace: Damn it man, you know I don't like being called by my first name.
Westman: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT HAS F***ING HAPPENED!  DO YOU REALIZE WHAT THIS MEANT OT ME!?
Wallace: What?  You got some kind of homo affair with this guy?  You two going faggot on each other?
Westman: You f***ing idiot!  Don't you get it!
Wallace: You're right, I don't.
Wallace hangs up the phone.
Jesus, what a crazy person.
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« Reply #903 on: April 15, 2012, 12:59:42 pm »
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Westman Personal Study
Governor's Mansion
Helena, Montana
A Few Minutes Later:


How could it happen so quickly?  How could my plans explode so quickly in my face?
Westman thought as he twirled a ballpoint pen.
It was supposed to be me and Walters!  Mano e Mano!  Till the end of time!  How could this sh*t happen?
Fate is a bunch of bullsh*t.
Maybe Doc is right, maybe I am going faggot for this guy.

Westman looks down at his journal and scribbles:
"He hits the ball but still he can't move to first."
He didn't even know what the hell that meant.  Hopefully, it's meaning will mean something after all of this.  After all, with Walters in a damaged state for the rest of his life it was likely that the Senate seat that Westman so wanted is going D even without Walters abandoning it.  I mean hell, who was going to run for it?  Who was going to succeed the great David Walters?
David Goldberg?
Though it would be interesting to have a Jewish Conservative Senator from Montana, Westman doubted that Goldberg would enter politics.  After all, he had the charisma of a brain damaged chimp.
Robert Gibson?
He has a handsome sounding name, a handsome face, a good wholesome family man image.......but that's all he is.  Pure fluff to cover up his natural dumb political nature.  He has mere rhetoric, nothing more.  He's more likely to run against Westman than he is to run for the Governor's seat.
In that case I might as well spend the campaign months smoking pot at Flathead Lake.
Really, the pool of Conservative candidates (because let us face facts, the state GOP is f***ing dead on the statewide level.  F***in' dead.  They are going to have to start appealing to the Conservatives soon to run unity tickets for god sake.
Donald Walters?
He's a f***Ing kid!  He's 28 years old!  He'll be barely old enough to be in the Senate to begin with as it is.  The only thing he would have going for him is the sympathy vote.  I mean, the guy is a f***in archaeologist and an all out social introvert (see: nerd), He is not a Larry Watson.
This is easily a Safe D pickup by any mental stretch.
If Walters retires due to his health that means a gimme D pretty much.  If he dies or resigns before January 3rd, according to Montana State Law a special election has to be held no later than the 1st Tuesday after the first Monday in February.  If he resigns or dies after that period, Westman can appoint anybody he wants to keep the seat warm for Schweitzer.
Then why is this turn of events pissing me off so much?  Is it the thought that I will never have the opportunity to beat David Walters in ana election ever again?  Am I really that much of an egotist?
Westman laughs again.
So not only did he need a new Lt. Governor, the thought of replacing a US Senator was now on his mind.
Hell of a job.
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« Reply #904 on: April 16, 2012, 03:09:09 am »
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Montana Election Law 748.11:
Amended February 9th, 1980
Replacing a vacant US Senate Seat:


If a US Senate seat becomes vacant between January 1st of a federal election year and January 3rd of the following year a Special Election will be held at a predetermined future date to determine the successor.  The Special Election date depends on the time of the year the vacancy occurred.  Here is the schedule of special dates in the case of US Senate vacancies during a federal election year:

January 1st-March 2nd:
The second Tuesday in April
March 2nd-May 2nd: The first Tuesday in July
May 2nd-September 3rd: The first Tuesday after the first Monday in November
September 3rd-November 5th: The second Tuesday in December
November 5th-January 3rd of the following year: The second Tuesday in February of the following year

This schedule is set up to allow each political candidate in Montana a month at least to campaign for the Special Election.  However, in the case of the vacant seat being a seat that will be up for election in November: Any vacancies before the first Tuesday after the first Monday in November will not have a special election.  Instead the Governor will nominate an interim Senator until January 3rd of the following year.  The regular Senate election will occur on the predetermined national date.  The winner of the election will replace the interim Senator come January 3rd of the following year.  The interim Senator appointed by the Governor also has the option to run in the election if they so choose.  Any vacancies after the general election date will be filled by the Senator-elect.

In the case of a vacancy occurring in a non-federal election year the Governor has the authority to appoint a US Senator.  It is unlawful for the Governor to appoint anyone to the US Senate in exchange for any kind of monetary consideration.  Doing so will result in the compromise of the Governor's office and a minimum sentence of five years in state prison and a fine of $25,000.  The Special election in this case will happen on the first Tuesday after the first Monday of November in the next federal election year.

In the case of non-voting recount related Senator-Elect absence before inauguration day an interim Senator will be chosen by the members of the Montana State Legislature to serve until the second Tuesday in February of the following year when a Special election shall take place.

It is against Montana State Law for the Governor to use nepotism when appointing an interim Senator a vacant seat.  However, it is entirely legal for any close relative of the current Governor to run in Special and/or General US Senate elections.
« Last Edit: April 16, 2012, 03:10:47 am by MechaRepublican »Logged



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Senator Cynic
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« Reply #905 on: April 16, 2012, 11:55:38 pm »
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Just caught up after being away for awhile. Gotta say this is good stuff as always.
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« Reply #906 on: April 24, 2012, 08:01:16 pm »
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December 8th, 1972
Missoula, Montana:


Carl wakes up on the couch and sees Nora Westman preparing breakfast.
He comes off the couch and walks over to her and hugs her from behind.
Nora: Hmmmmm, hi Carl.
Herschelwitz: Good morning!
Nora: You seem a bit chipper this morning.
Herschelwitz: Well, just enjoy a good morning breakfast I guess.
The door from the bedroom opens as Scott Westman, sexy bedhair and all, walks out.  As if on cue, Nora Westman drops the wooden spoon she was mixing the eggs with, and rushes towards her brother.
Nora: Morning Scotty!
She flies into his arms like a hurricane hitting a port city.  Westman strokes some of her hair.  After about 50 seconds she lets go before turning around as Westman wraps his arms around her.
She giggles.
Westman: So lovely little sister, what're your plans for today?
Nora takes out a little wrapper and hand it to Westman.
Nora: Don't forget our morning dosage.
She takes out a pinky's worth and dips it on Westman's tongue before he leans down and kisses her long red hair.
Damn it, even Scott has a better chance at scoring with Nora than I do.  And she's his f***ing sister for god's sake.
Carl looks over at the clock and notices it's 9:35.
Herschelwitz: So, it's 9:35.
The two red haired and pale white siblings looked over at Carl, Nora leaning back into Scott, with kind of a disinterested look.
Westman: Yeah....annnnd?
Herschelwitz: Brea?
Westman laughs.
Nora: Oh yeah, she's gone now.
Herschelwitz: What do you mean?
Westman: Carl buddy, she has her own alarm set.
Herschelwitz: May I make a comment?
The two siblings, obviously enjoying each other's company and the white substance a little too much, look at him.
Herschelwitz: Why do you guys do this sh*t?
Nora: What're youse?  A f***ing prude?  It's not like we fu-
Herschelwitz: No, I mean this sh*t.
He reaches over and takes the baggie from Westman.
Westman: Bitch......you better be careful with that.
Herschelwitz: Or else what?  This sh*t will kill you Scott!  Don't you realize that!
westman: That sh*t also costs me $50 a bag man.  That isn't easy money.  What?  You think living as a high school history teacher is a decent salary to take care of this little kitten?
Nora looks up at Westman and does a sexy meow before kissing him on the mouth.
Herschelwitz: Get a room guys.
Nora: We already got one.
Herschelwitz: Your parents must be so proud.  Two coke addicted siblings who are too busy with each other to realize the responsibilities of raising a child.
Herschelwitz leaves, slamming the door behind him.
Westman lets go of Nora and heads towards a closet, grabbing a leather jacket and a fashion beret and some killer sunglasses.
Westman: Huh prude.  Come on babe, we got a deal to make.
Nora picks up a leather jacket that is hanging over a chair and puts it on as Westman hands her a beret and sunglasses.
Nora: Man, Carl is really bothering me man.  The way he comes up behind me and the morning and what not, just creepy.
Westman reaches into a drawer in the kitchen and pulls out a large handgun, a .44 Desert Eagle.
Nora: Youse listening to anything I'm saying?
Westman: Yeah.  Don't get too concerned about it hon.
Westman reaches behind a box of Fruity Pebbles and picks up a cartridge of .44 bullets.
Nora: It's a little creepy is all.  I mean come on, he's a little awkward man with a bald-what the f*** man!  You bringing that sh*t with youse?
Westman: Insurance okay?  Some bloke might try to rig a deal so to speak.
Nora: G**damnit Scott, ISN'T THAT GUN LIKE F***ING ILLEGAL IN LIKE 42 F***ING STATES?'
Westman: Nora, this is Montana.  I could walk into a f***ing cafe with an automatic shotgun and nobody would think twice.
Nora: Right.
Westman: Besides, a lot of the gun laws are expiring now that we got Kennedy in office.  Damned Morton was a damned statist who wanted to ban BB Guns for f*** sake.  Though, I can't say I'm a fan of Kennedy either.  Damned moderate hero.  Oh yes, you can have your gun little Mountain Men!  You just need a dozen or so documents, trigger locks, and wait for like two f***ing weeks!  F***ing regulations, f***ing gun control!
Nora: Babe, why does this bother you so much?
Westman: Because, damn guns gave us freedom and liberty!  And damn guns will keep corporatist greedy capitalists in check!
Nora: Seriously?
Westman: Yes.  The Capitalists want to take our guns, otherwise we would not be able to rise up!
Nora: Meh, I would think they would want us to have guns so we can kill each other.
Westman: Statist lies.  The Capitalists keep us killing each other by poverty, not guns.  Anyway, let's go.
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« Reply #907 on: May 04, 2012, 12:50:20 pm »
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Republican Conference Room
State Capitol Building
Helena, Montana
November 28th, 1986:


Senators Helen Brisco and Randy Coulter are seated at the table.
Coulter: Imagine that, the handsome Governor wants to talk to you.....again.
Brisco laughs.
Coulter: I think he fancies you Helen, a bit too much actually.  What do you guys talk about anyway?
Brisco: OH nothing huge, just "compromise".
Coulter: Oh I bet.  I hear the Governor has a fetish for pretty Republican women.  Especially WASPs.
Brisco scoffs.
Brisco: Well, he does like to stare into my eyes when we make lo-I mean when we talk about possible modifications to his ambitious Green Montana program.
Coulter laughs.
Coulter: Ha!  I knew it!
Brisco: Damn it Randy!
Coulter: So how is he?  I mean, how open is he to talking about the job?
Brisco: Oh not really at all.  The most I got out of him was his frustration with Mendelik and lately with this whole Walters business.  He is not in a good mood.
Coulter: He must be feeling lonely, no?  If he's asking for you now?
Brisco: He must be really stressed or something.
Coulter: You know, I wasn't supposed to say anything to you, but the Caucus has been putting forward alternatives for the Governor to consider for the Lieutenant Governor position.  ANd yeah...............awkward.
Brisco looks at it before she nearly has a heartattack.
Brisco: My god........
Coulter: Some of the higher ups get the wrong impression from your "relationship".  They thought that maybe you and the Governor were discussing bipartisan affairs.
Brisco laughs.
Brisco: Well we kind of were.  But.....BUT we can't just tell them Randy!  I mean, my career could be over!
Coulter: Yes of course: young pretty Republican lawmaker admits to passionate sexual affair with the radical yet handsome and most of all married Democratic Governor.  Sounds like something the Enquirer would make up doesn't it?
Brisco: God............this can't be happening!
Coulter looks up with a grin.
Coulter: However, there is a chance that we can get you out of this controversy.....safely.
Brisco looks up at him confused.
Coulter: Of course, your best talents are at the legislator level.  Granted, the Governor, if he thinks more with his head than his libido, would probably protest having you as his lieutenant.  However, we can't risk the possibility of this getting out.  So, I've put your name forward as a suggestion for candidate for the US Senate seat that will inevitably be vacated by David Walters.
Brisco looks at him with confusion.
Brisco: I'm sorry Randy, please explain how you can be so certain about David Walters vacating his seat?
Coulter: Well, maybe this should explain it better than I can.
Coulter turns on a tv next to where he is standing and Helen Brisco turns to watch.

"This is CNN News.

Today, a truly emotional episode as Montana Senator David Walters is wheeled out of the Davenport Regional Hospital by his brother Donald.  The Senator, who lost his wife and several friends, has managed to survive this tragedy.  While he has survived, the damage has cost him greatly.  Namely, the Senator is now on a daily regiment of strong pain medication and has lost a great amount of his motor skills."

Coulter turns off the television.

Brisco: Wow.......
Coulter: It's only a matter of time.  Hopefully he resigns or croaks sooner rather than later.
Brisco: Randy!
Coulter: I apologize my dear, but sometimes it is necessary for you to know the true political reality.  The truth is that David Walters is just as grave to our success as Scott Westman is.  There is a reason why this party is so much weaker now, reason one is David Walters.  Having the nutso Mendelik D'Israeli represent us hasn't helped either.
Brisco: Nor did Richard Peters!
Randy Coulter grumbles under his breath.
Coulter: Whatever.  Just know your role and shut your mouth.  Because now I got evidence I can use against you if you dare as so much betray us.
Brisco nods, grimly.
Brisco: What're you going to say to me next?  Make me a sandwich?!
Coulter: I apologize again Helen.  But again, you must understand how vital this is to our plans.  Hell, the Governor might be enthusiastic about nominating you to the soon to be vacant Senate seat.....just to put distance between you two.
Brisco looks hurt.
Brisco: He....would.....do....that?
Coulter: Come on Helen!  Are you that enthralled with him to not see it!  HE'S A MARRIED DEMOCRATIC GOVERNOR!  You think he wants the risk of your liasions to become public knowledge?  You have any idea how much harm that would do to him amongst his own f***ing party?
Brisco: But......he.....likes me.  Like he really likes me.
Coulter: Yes he might, but it's much safer for him to "like" you if you live in DC than if you live five feet away from him.
Rachel nods.
Brisco looks up at Coulter.
Brisco: But, what if Walters kicks it before January 3rd?
Coulter: Well, God be with us if that happens.  I only hope that an anti-Westman Democrat, like Baucus, manages to win.
« Last Edit: May 05, 2012, 06:29:10 pm by Hard Ons About Warren »Logged



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« Reply #908 on: May 05, 2012, 10:27:23 am »
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This is an absolutely splendid plot twist, Mechaman. Good things come to those that wait! Smiley
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« Reply #909 on: May 06, 2012, 08:26:07 am »
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Governor's Office
Later that Afternoon:


Helen Brisco is sitting on Scott Westman's lap on the Gubernatorial couch.
Brisco: Scott, what's wrong?
Westman: Besides this f***ing insanity?  Oh nothing much!
Brisco: Is it Caroline?
Westman nods as Brisco leans her head against his shoulder.
Westman: I mean, why the hell did I get married?
Brisco: Why the hell did I sleep with a married man?
Both of them laugh.
Westman: She left me.  And took our boys.
Brisco: Oh Scott, oh dear...........
Westman: She's in Hyannis right now.  And I doubt she will come back.  That's it, I'm f***ing finished love.  Just a flash in the pan.  CNN will probably pick up this story and it's now "Mr. One Term Governor and Never Was Close to the Presidency" Westman.
A tear falls down Westman's face.
Inside, Helen was smiling.  Celebrating even.
Helen grabs Westman's hand and interlocks her fingers into his.
Westman: And let me guess, you're pregnant aren't you?
Helen laughs.
Brisco: No, I'm infertile remember?  That's why my bastard ex-husband broke up with me.  He wanted kids, I couldn't produce.....and here we are.  I'm just sad I played a part in ending yours.
Westman: That's not true Helen.  I'm a sex addict.  I bang anything with a heartbeat.  It's a curse.  With or without you, I still would've failed.  It's just (chokes up) I thought I really could do it.  I thought I could be faithful I really did!
Helen turns around to face him.
Brisco: Oh for god's sake Scott!  You're blaming yourself for marrying a bitter ice queen?
Westman: THAT'S MY WIFE YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!
Brisco: Yes and I just happen to be the woman you prefer sleeping with, I wonder why.  If anything the worst mistake you made was thinking you could have a happy marriage with Caroline Kennedy.  I mean, she wouldn't even sleep with you until you got married!  What kind of sh*t is that?!
Westman looks at her with a weird kind of understanding.
Brisco: I mean really, did you marry her because you loved her, or because it was the politically expedient thing to do?  Marrying a Kennedy?
Westman shoves her off of him.
Westman: That's enough damn it!
Brisco looks at Westman.
Brisco: Why do you keep sleeping around on her then?
Westman: BECAUSE I'M A SEX ADDIC-
Brisco: Could it possibly because she denies you real passion?  Face it babe you made a horrible life decision in 1983.
Westman: Maybe......but I can't just divorce her.  THAT WILL END ME!
Brisco: Well sh*t YOU SHOULD'VE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT BEFORE!
Helen slowly makes her way back into Westman's arms.
Brisco: So..........I guess that means your schedule in the evenings are more open now?
Westman stiffens.
Westman: Oh yeah definitely.  My daughter may be living here but-
Brisco: Oh yes, Brea?  She's really cool and all.  I remember meeting her last year at Progfest.  We talked for like hours.  But.....is she really 23 years old!?
Westman laughs.
Westman: Yeah, people always have that kind of reaction.  "Your daughter is six years younger than your wife!?  What!?"  Meh, that's what happens with raging teenage hormones in the far northwest in the early 60's.  Not much to do in Whitefish except have sex, get drunk, and ski.  I did a lot of the latter.
Brisco laughs once more.
Suddenly the door opens as a tall tanned man walks in wearing some traditional Native American garb.
Brisco is about to jump out when she feels Westman gentling restraining her with his hand.
Westman: It's alright love, don't you recognize State Senator Means?  He's a good friend of mine.
Means looks over at the couch and sees Scott Westman reclining on the couch with his arm around Senator Brisco.
Fascinating.  I knew the Governor liked bipartisanship, but wow he's really friendly with the opposition........
Means: Is this "hug a Republican day" Scott?
Westman chuckles.
Westman: Nah man, we just having a mid-afternoon nap you know?  Legislating is such hard work on you people man.  Luckily, Helen has good tastes in cuddle partners.
Means chuckles.
Means: Okay, whatever.  You didn't call me in here to show off your new cuddle buddy, so what's up?
Westman motions for him to sit in the leather chair across from the couch.
Westman: Well, you know that Lieutenant Governor business?  Well.............
« Last Edit: May 06, 2012, 10:58:06 am by Hard Ons About Warren »Logged



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« Reply #910 on: May 08, 2012, 01:44:22 pm »
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November 29th, 1986
State Senate:


Scott Westman approaches the Montana State Senate with Russell Means behind him.
Westman: Honorable members of the Montana Senate, it is with pleasure that I introduce my choice for the new Lt. Governor.  As you all know State Senator Means is a great representative for his section.  His voice on many issues, namely Native American and Economic Affairs, has helped us so much over the past decade or so.  Going over his resume, I believe there is no other person more qualified to take the responsibility of Lt. Governor.
A vote would be taken later that afternoon, with 33 Ayes, 15 Nays, and 2 "No VOtes" (one of them being Rusell Means, who felt a conflict of interest in voting for himself).  As a result Russell Means would become the next Lt. Governor effective in two weeks time on December 12th, 1986.
The entire Democratic caucus (absent Means) would vote for his ascension to Lt. Governor.  Helen Brisco, leading a group of Westman Republicans (7), would support him as well.  The weak tri-partisan support was systematic of the times, as the Republicans and Conservatives were mostly enraged at Scott Westman.
However, Scott Westman had plans to change that.
« Last Edit: May 08, 2012, 02:18:21 pm by Intellectual Extremist »Logged



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« Reply #911 on: May 09, 2012, 09:35:24 am »
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December 8th, 1986
Governor's Mansion:


Scott Westman goes downstairs into the kitchen to get some breakfast.
No woman in the house?  Wow, I actually feel free for once.
He reaches into a cabinet and pulls out some Frosted Flakes.
THEEEEEEEEEY'RE GRATE!
He gets a bowl and some milk from the refrigerator.  He throws in the flakes and adds the milk to it.  He reaches into a nearby drawer and pulls out a silver spoon and takes a bite.
Westman: Wow, that is great!
After getting a cup of orange juice he proceeds to sit at the dining room table, which he never ate at besides on special state business, and reaches over for the newspaper.
Whoopsie, it's not there!  Why?  Because you insisted on not having "butlers" in the house!
Westman: Shut up.
Westman gets up and goes out the front door and walks to the newspaper box underneath his mailbox.  He reaches in and grabs the paper before walking back to the Mansion.
He takes a seat back behind his bowl of cereal and proceeds to read the headline:
EXCLUSIVE!  FIRST LADY TO DIVORCE GOVERNOR!
Cool, whatever.  Let's see what's in Sports.
He flips over to the Sports section.
Looks like MU has a good chance this year.  How about that.  Wait a minute!
Westman flips back to the front.
EXCLUSIVE!  FIRST LADY TO DIVORCE GOVERNOR!
Westman looks down in horror at a picture of his wife, with one of her bodyguards to her side, with papers in her hand in front of a mike.
WHAT.
THE.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

EDIT: Changed story because this sounds more negative to Westman.
« Last Edit: May 11, 2012, 08:46:20 am by Intellectual Extremist »Logged



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« Reply #912 on: May 11, 2012, 06:08:21 am »
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lol
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« Reply #913 on: May 16, 2012, 09:37:46 pm »
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What's the national summary look like at this point?
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« Reply #914 on: May 17, 2012, 01:16:05 am »
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What's the national summary look like at this point?

Let me see here:

Democratic leaders so far are discussing a national platform for Tobin MacMahon to address the new Dem Majority Senate in January, Jon Debs is preparing his retirement speech as a successor will take his place as Democratic House leader after nearly two decades of leadership, the Administration is using intelligence services covertly to find out who attacked on 9/6, millions have left the New York City metro area to settle in other areas of the Northeast after being treated for radiation sickness and other medical issues.  The spread of radiation has been largely curtailed, but not impossible to avoid.  Over the past few months radiation illnesses have spread throughout the northeast and the fishing industry is at a standstill after many fish have died and are inedible from radiation poisoning.  The Northeast is entering a bad recession in the aftermath of 9/6.
Same thing for parts of the South after the nuke went off in Florida.  Millions are without jobs and safe water or electricity.
Many refugees from the bombings have started their futures......headed west.

The wipe out of Wall Street is far reaching, as the financial sector has collapsed.  Economies are still held stable in many parts of the country though despite the massive plunge in the stock market.  The stock market has been moved to Boston, Massachusetts where backup stocks and securities are kept for many of the Fortune 500 companies and the like.  Newly elected Democrats have promised to do everything in their power to get AMerica back up and running in the aftermath of the horrible attacks and to bring those responsible to justice.  For that to happen they are advocating tax increases on the upper classes, effectively undoing the flat tax passed in '85 after the 1981 Tax Act went it's course.  This will require massive stimulus bills, the likes of which have never been seen, to rebuild the destroyed cities and urban areas as well as a massive amount of additional funding for the Public Healthcare System to care for impoverish Americans dealing with radiation poisoning and other medical issues.
Much of the debate in Congress has come down to this issue, which Democrats seem to be winning in the polls and in the election results.

The investigation into 9/6 hasn't revealed much except that most of the bombs were foul play set up by former Derry Liberation Army members turned mercenaries who are being held in interrogation to find out who hired them to set the bombs.  Revelation of Irish bomb experts behind the attack has had unintended consequences in the urban areas of the country as a number of pubs have been ransacked and various property destroyed by vandals.  There is a consistent theme in most of these attacks, namely that most of the atrocities are committed against Irish and Italian American (and several Jewish) business owners by Irish, Italian, Jewish, Polish, and various other urban minorities.  Most of these vandals have claimed to stopping "traitors" who have helped an invisible well monied enemy to pull off the attacks.  One pub owner, a Gary Flanagan of South Chicago, was found with his throat slit on a crucifix next to the sign for his bar at 5:42 AM December 2nd, 1986.  Later investigations revealed he was connected with the Callahan Syndicate, the largest Criminal organization on Earth who could literally buy Hilton Hotels like most people make car payments.

That is all I can think of.
« Last Edit: May 28, 2012, 05:38:42 am by Guns Don't Kill People, I Do »Logged



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« Reply #915 on: May 20, 2012, 11:57:24 am »
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December 8th Cont.:

Scott Westman gets out of his car and heads towards the State Capitol when a press mob shows up.
Press: Governor, could you give us your side of the story on this personal episode of yours?
Westman turns towards the short man and chuckles.
Westman: "Personal episode?"
Press: You know, the papers.......
Westman: No actually I don't know Paul.  I just woke up late this morning at 10:13 and am just now headed towards the Capitol to get some business done.  This Green Montana plan is important for our fu-
Press: Well surely your divorce-
Westman grabs his microphone.
Westman: Divorce?  DIVORCE!?  Please explain as I was happily married last night I went to-
Press: Well sir, your wife, Caroline Kennedy Westman, announced her intent to divorce you last night at 9PM EST.
Westman: Well ain't that just F***IN' GREAT!?
Westman shoves the short guy out of the way and heads towards the Capitol.
The short reporter turns towards the camera man and comments:
Press: I apologize for the Governor's language.  Obviously he is in a distressed state of mind and we wish him well.
« Last Edit: June 09, 2012, 12:32:15 pm by True Federalist »Logged



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« Reply #916 on: May 20, 2012, 12:15:37 pm »
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State Capitol:

Westman enters the building and the first person he sees is Helen Brisco.  The Republican Senator from Billings.
And his lover.
Westman walks towards her and kisses her on the cheek as a press person takes pictures.
Westman: Senator.
Brisco: Governor.
There is an awkward silence between the two and a number of press cameras start taking pictures.
Brisco speaks up.
Brisco: Governor, are you sure you shouldn't take a day off you know to gather your head?
Westman: Nonsense.  I got important business to take care of.  I could give a damn what happens next.  Fate seems to be want to giving me the finger lately, so why should I care how much more sh*t gets thrown my way while this state suffers from weak infrastructure and inefficient resource usage?
Westman turns around to the press people.
Westman: And you!  You press people go to hell.  I got more important things to discuss than my personal life.  Like the advancement of Montana interests both here and on the international stage.  Maybe if people like you kept quiet about insignificant crap like this I could get this accomplished, but alas no!
Westman walks off with Brisco to his office.
Brisco: Look Scott, my dear.......
Westman: Helen, why does everyone seem to care so much about what's going on now days?
Brisco: Look, if I had anything to do with it I'm sor-
Westman: It's all in the past now.  Caroline is leaving me, and taking my sons.  Just like Laura Hennigan did before me.  It seems, I will grow up to be truly sonless no matter how many boys my seed gives birth too.  The Lord certainly is a fan of irony.  Besides, shouldn't you be working on preparing your argument in opposition?
Brisco: Well if it's the same to you (Westman opens the door for Brisco) I would prefer to work with you on it.
Westman: Helen, my wife announced she wanted to divorce me last night.  The last thing I need is some pity se-
Brisco: No no no no dear.  I mean actually try to work out some compromise of this Green Montana thing.  Personally I think it's a bit wasteful and I'm not a fan of all the government funding for it.
Westman smiles.
Westman: Well okay good.  I'll call Russell in here and we'll go over some alternatives.  It may not hurt to contact a Conservative to offer insight into this.
Brisco: You know they will oppose it anyway.  Damned Conservatives seem to operate on a "NO NO NO NO NO!" basis when it comes to you.
Westman: They weren't so resistant when it came to my legalizing lever action rifles.
Brisco: Funny people those Conservatives.  Eh, Randy opposed that one.  Selfish Peters partisan that he is.
Westman: Haha, no matter his time is short.  Billings statist that he is.
Brisco: Hey!
Westman comes up behind Helen and wraps his arms around her.
Brisco: Scott......I thought you weren't in the mood for this.
Westman: Babe, I'm a sex addict.  I'm always in the mood.
Brisco laughs.
Brisco: What about around Brea?
Westman breaks away from her and fake vomits into a pot.
Westman: Well........almost always.
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« Reply #917 on: May 22, 2012, 06:22:44 pm »
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Lol!
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When I was in the third grade, I thought that I was Jewish
Because I could count, my nose was big, and I kept my bank account fullish
I told my mom, tears blurring my vision
He said, "Mort, you've loved God since before circumcision"
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« Reply #918 on: June 01, 2012, 10:35:08 am »
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WTF dude? Now, that we're a neighbours in one board, you're stopping to write?
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« Reply #919 on: June 01, 2012, 01:07:43 pm »
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WTF dude? Now, that we're a neighbours in one board, you're stopping to write?

Give me a break, I'm at the drawing board!

(ie, I've got writer's block)
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« Reply #920 on: June 01, 2012, 01:21:53 pm »
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NOTE: GOING TO SKIP DIVORCE DRAMA

December 23rd, 1986
Governor's Mansion
1:51 PM


Scott Westman is passed out on the couch in his study with some dried out weed next to him.  He wakes up and goes over to the desk to get out some whiskey and gin.
The phone rings.
Westman picks it up.
Westman: Hello.....?
Herschelwitz: Dude man.....did you really just wake up?
Westman: Oh come on man....it can't be that late can it?
Herschelwitz: It's 1:51 in the afternoon.
Westman: Jesus dude, should've just let me sleep until I died man.  I was having such a good sleep man.
Herschelwitz: Quit smoking that crack rock man.  Turn on the tv.
Westman turns on the tv and sees the news story:
MONTANA SENATOR DEAD AFTER CARDIAC ARREST.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
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« Reply #921 on: June 15, 2012, 08:48:03 am »
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Dec 23rd Cont.:

Herschelwitz:
So, how's the divorce going?
Westman: Oh well you know, she's having second thoughts.
Herschelwitz: Oh really?
Westman: Well it's weird because I was like "take whatever" and now she suddenly has cold feet.
Herschelwitz: Don't you care at all?  It's your marriage!
Westman: Meh, at this point I figure it's a lost cause.  I got much better things to concern myself with, like this f***ing death.  Sh*t!  F**k!  Why did you have to die you dumb reactionary motherf***er!?
Herschelwitz: Scott, you do realize that without David Walters there is no competent opposition to you right?
Westman: Yes, which is sad.
Herschelwitz: A victory is a victory, no?
Westman: Dude, every election I've won so far has been against incompetent assholes.  And now, the one competent opposition politician in this f***ing state f***ing dies on us.  You have any idea how it feels right now, knowing that you will only ever face incompetent failures for political office and that the one comptent man you faced, the one person with political savvy you ever faced not only has beaten you before but that you will never be able to best him......you have any idea how much that hurts?
Herschelwitz: You got problems.
Westman: Althroughout history people will now say "Scott Westman lost against David Walters, David Walters was the better man."
Herschelwitz: Hey it could be worse.......
Westman: Good point.  Anyway, where is Helen?
Herschelwitz: Down at the GOP Conference Room.  Why?  You got an update on Green Montana or the Marijuana Bill?
Westman gets out of his chair and walks towards the door and opens it.
Westman: No, I need her for emotional support.
The door closes.
Herschelwitz: Horny bastard.

Five Hours Later:

Scott Westman is laying down on the couch in his personal study with a very naked and warm Helen Brisco cuddled up against him while he is on the phone.
Westman: My hands are tied alright?  If I could pardon you I would man.  You know I like pot and think our laws are ridiculous in this regard.  Anyway, I'm resting with a very beautiful woman right now so would you mind?
Voice on phone: You prick!  This is my life!  And you are putting that aside right now for some ass?
Westman: Youse gots to appreciate the finer things in life friend.  I can only grant pardons, per the state constitution, upon leaving office.  Not while in office.  Go to the f***ing parole boards or whoever the f*** does that.  I am not the guy to see about that.
Voice on phone: You ain't doin sh*t!
Westman: Well what'd you expect?  I'm Governor of Montana.  The Lieutenant Governor might do more than I do and that's saying a lot.  A pretty little thing gives me a very warm hug and touches me in a very nice place how the hell should I respond anyway?
Voice on phone: Dude what?  You are making no sense.
Westman: Dude, what has happened to you really f***ing sucks.  The best I can do right now is help pass this Marijuana Bill for youse.  This should retroactively release you from prison.  You'll just have to wait a few months okay?  Anyway, see youse later.
Westman hangs up the phone as Brisco slithers up him until the two are face to face.
Brisco: Scott, honey.......about this Special Election....
Westman puts his arms around her and starts to kiss her.  She mumbles something before giving up.
The tv turned on.
CNN: In other news, there is more development in the tragic death of Montana Senator David Walters.  On the Democratic side state Democratic Party Chairman David Mansfield has indicated his interest in running for the Democratic Nomination for the US Senate.  Mansfield intends to bring back "traditional Montana values" to the US Senate as he has felt that it has been lacking in the past decade or so.  His targets of criticism have been former US Senator Max Baucus and Scott Westman, the incumbent Governor of Montana.  He has further attacked current Senator Killian Darkwater as being a "blantant advocate of Westmanism" in the Senate.  As of the moment he is the only Democrat to declare interest in running.
« Last Edit: June 15, 2012, 12:44:23 pm by Irish Dixiecrat »Logged



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« Reply #922 on: June 15, 2012, 12:21:14 pm »
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I thought it's dead. Glad to be wrong.
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« Reply #923 on: June 15, 2012, 03:49:50 pm »
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RIP David Walters. Cry
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« Reply #924 on: June 18, 2012, 11:37:03 pm »
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"Esteemed child molester, homosexual, philanderer, alcoholic, and drug addict.  Ladies and Gents!  Our beloved Governor.....Scott Westman!"

Coulter:
And to think, nobody can beat this son of a bitch!?
Representative Kyle looks over at Coulter.
Kyle: Well, these are likability polls we are seeing sir.  Obviously, if it came down to politics that would be a different stor-
Coulter: This son of a bitch is likable!  That's even worse!  This man loves little girls!  He likes men in dresses!  He nails anything with a heartbeat and doesn't lie about it!  He competes with Irish steel workers in Butte in beer competition!  And he even has admitted to smoking dope!  How the hell is he more likable than us!
Flem Labierre, a GOP operative from Maine, comes forward.
Labierre: The problem here is that you guys suffer from an image problem.  The people of Montana see the most vocal anti-Westman Republicans as sore elitist losers.  While the other half are people who are so in love with Scott Westman you wonder if he's porking them.
Laughter arises from the room.
Labierre: This party is a very divided one.  Frankly, Richard Peters was a sh*t Governor-
Coulter: Pack your bags and get the hell out of her-
Labierre: Hush man, hush.  The problems don't end with him.  It is a problem systematic in the Republican Party.  We wouldn't be in this situation if we had half the unity that the Democratic Party has had even when they were reduced to their worst levels in nearly a century.  They held strong, they stood by each other.  The public wanted their heads in 1980, wanted their damn heads on platters......and what did we end up doing?  We ended up faction fighting with each other and splitting into three different parties instead of unitin-
Kyle: Come on Flem!  Beauregard D'Israeli was the candidate!  He's a psycho!  How were conservatives and moderates supposed to swallow it up and vote for him!?
Labierre: It is also true that in the weeks up to the convention D'Israeli was busy using his influence in the party machinery to "ninja" his way to the nomination.  HE DID NOT WIN THE PRIMARIES.  In fact, the best he did was win his homestate and then win barely a 32% plurality in Montana.  The nomination was stolen from Crane.  What ended up happening, a third party Crane presidency, was karma.  However, several of our own members have been so rude as to keep on opposing this president and our own survival.  Members like Thad O'Connor, son of a bitch from Maine wh-
Coulter: is best friends with our sh*t Governor, who is a Democrat!  I see them two together occasionally, holding hands and sh*t.  Like gay lovers.
Labierre: Luckily, karma took out O'Connor last election due to the Democratic wave.  Heaven hopes he isn't so foolish to try to get back into office in '88.  Last I heard he was back at his father's place being a short little drunkard with no hopes and aspirations for the future.  And in this state, the self destruction of Mendelik D'Israeli is sure to have some huge dividends.
Coulter: The highest ranking Republican public official in the state?  Please explain.
Labierre: Well, it goes back to our central goal, and that is coalition building.  With D'Israeli out of the way we can open up talks for coalition.
Coulter laughs.
Coulter: My ass.  Half of the party hates the Conservatives.  Ironically, it's the half you would expect to be the most sympathetic to them.
Labierre: Oh yes, the libertarians.  Well, surely they can see that Scott Westman's Green Montana is a big government boondoggle that will surely turn out to be the most expensive government program ever initiated in this state?
Coulter: Yes, that is true.  However, they are idiots for social issues.  They love Scott Sexy Man because he supports marijuana legalization amongst other things.  We need to somehow cull these idiots before they cause too much trouble.
Labierre: Soon, they too will be powerless before our coalition.
Coulter looks at Labierre with a quizzical look.
Labierre: Don't you see?  We are setting up a new alignment here!
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