Ratherisms

[Silent Hunter]

You what?

"Do you hear that knocking...President Bush's re-election is at the door."

"This race is hotter than the Devil's anvil."

"His lead is as thin as turnip soup."

"This race is humming along like Ray Charles."

"The presidential race is swinging like Count Basie."

"This race is hotter than a Times Square Rolex."

"Ohio becomes like a sauna for the two candidates. All they can do is wait and sweat."

"One's reminded of that old saying, 'Don't taunt the alligator until after you've crossed the creek.'"

"Bush is sweeping through the South like a big wheel through a cotton field."

"What Kerry needs at this point is the equivalent of Tom Brady coming off the bench to rescue him. But it's still too close to call."

"No question now that Kerry's rapidly reaching the point where he's got his back to the wall, his shirttails on fire and the bill collector's at the door."

"John Kerry needs something on the order of a 55 or 60-yard field goal to win this."

(To Joe Lockhart) "I know that you'd rather walk through a furnace in a gasoline suit than consider the possibility that John Kerry would lose Ohio."

(To Joe Lockhart) "What about Michigan? It's been out there for a long time. Is that making your fingernails sweat?"

"This presidential race has been crackling like a hickory fire for at least the last hour and a half."

"Let's see where it goes from here. Round and round it goes, where it stops nobody knows."

"We keep talking about Ohio if you've been tuning in and out or you put the baby to bed or you went to pop the cap on an adult, or otherwise, beverage..."

"We used to say if a frog had side pockets, he'd carry a handgun."

"No one is saying that George Bush is not going to win the election, and if you had to bet the double-wide, you'd have to bet that he'd win."

"In southern states they beat him like a rented mule."

"If you try to read the tea leaves before the cup is done you can get yourself burned."

"We need Billy Crystal to Analyze This"

"You know that old song, 'it's delightful, it's delicious, it's de-lovely' for President Bush in most areas of the country."

"We had a slight hitch in our giddy up, but we corrected that."

"In some ways, George Bush's lead is as thin as November ice."

"Put on a cup of coffee, this race isn't going to be over for a while."

"You look at the map and say it's all a big Bush victory. But this is one time when your Mother is right, looks can be deceiving."

"John Kerry's moon has just moved behind a cloud, as far as Florida is concerned."

On Kerry's chances: "To use a metaphor, he's gotta draw to an inside straight. But hey, sometimes you get lucky and hit that straight."

"Is it like a swan, with every feather above the water settled, but under the water paddling like crazy?"

"What you have here is the football equivalent of a fourth quarter rally by Kerry."

The election is "closer than Lassie and Timmy"

"Keep in mind they are teetotally meetmortally convinced they have Ohio won."

"Vice President Dick Cheney would not have flown all the way out there (Hawaii) overnight and put that lei around his neck and sort of hula-danced, if you will, unless he thought there was a chance of carrying that out there."

"President Bush smiling there with his family. He's laid down aces so far."

"You can almost hear the GOP (deep breathing sound). We're getting within maybe smelling distance."

"We don't know what to do. We don't know whether to wind a watch or bark at the moon."

On how the results are affecting strategists: "It's one reason so many of them drink a lot."

Sen. John McCain (R-AZ), on being congratulated on victory by Rather: "Thanks Dan, I always believe you." Rather: "Now, ladies and gentleman, if you believe that, you'll believe rocks can grow."

[WalterMitty]

lol those are great.

[Alcon]

Nothing can beat 2000's "Big Mexican Food" comment, but these are great.

[The Vorlon]

Nothing can beat 2000's "Big Mexican Food" comment, but these are great.

Big Mexican Food...?

[Giant Saguaro]

He has some good ones, I will give him that. Very dry sense of humor.

I remember his one from 2000 that I guess he didn't use this time, which went, "Bush is tearing through the south like a tornado through a trailor park."

[Alcon]

Nothing can beat 2000's "Big Mexican Food" comment, but these are great.

Big Mexican Food...?

"Florida--they say California's the big burrito; Texas is a big taco right now. We want to follow that through. Florida is a big tamale. It's not only a hot tamale, it's the only tamale that counts..."

[Schmitz in 1972]

"Florida goes Bush. The presidency is Bush. That's it. Sip it. Savor it Cup it. Photostat it. Underline it in red. Press it in a book. Put it in an album. Hang it on the wall. George Bush is the next president of the United States." - Dan Rather, November 8, 2000

[opebo]

Damn, I forgot how good Dan is..  too bad we don't get CBS in Thailand.

I had to choose between lifeless CNN and the GOP network.

[rbt48]

I enjoyed him bolding declaring (must have been about 4 AM EST), that CBS would not declare Ohio for Bush, in spite of rumors that Bush was about to claim victory whether Kerry conceded or not.  He pontificated, "we don't call Presidential Elections, the people do!"  Never mind that he had already called about 40 states.

At that point, Ed Bradley chirpped in that, based on his mathematical calculations, given the current margin with 99% of the vote in, and the anticipated number of provisional ballots, there was no possibility that Kerry could make up the needed number of votes.

Rather responded that , "well, Ed, it is not like you are a mathematics professor ... "  Ed quickly responded that, as a matter of fact, he did used to teach math. 

At that point, Rather responded with his best Ratherism--total silence.  Though he didn't react to Ed Bradley's logic and produce a call on Ohio.

It still irks me that they (all) had called Pennsylvania for Kerry with a somewhat smaller lead than Bush owned in Ohio.  Seems to me to be inconsistent.

[Angel of Death]

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Dan_Rather

[J. J.]

Over caution.  FL, PA and OH should have been called earlier, by all networks.

[opebo]

I enjoyed him bolding declaring (must have been about 4 AM EST), that CBS would not declare Ohio for Bush, in spite of rumors that Bush was about to claim victory whether Kerry conceded or not.  He pontificated, "we don't call Presidential Elections, the people do!"  Never mind that he had already called about 40 states.

At that point, Ed Bradley chirpped in that, based on his mathematical calculations, given the current margin with 99% of the vote in, and the anticipated number of provisional ballots, there was no possibility that Kerry could make up the needed number of votes.

Rather responded that , "well, Ed, it is not like you are a mathematics professor ... "  Ed quickly responded that, as a matter of fact, he did used to teach math. 

At that point, Rather responded with his best Ratherism--total silence.  Though he didn't react to Ed Bradley's logic and produce a call on Ohio.

It still irks me that they (all) had called Pennsylvania for Kerry with a somewhat smaller lead than Bush owned in Ohio.  Seems to me to be inconsistent.

They were trying to make the best of a very bad situation.