UK MPs

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Bob Ainsworth, Labour, Coventry North East

Shadow (and former) Defense Secretary.

Old fashioned Midlands Labour-Right machine man who ousted a Left incumbent in a factional coup before the 1992 election (Labour politics in Coventry was rough back then). Didn't really distinguish himself in government, but he didn't fyc up either. Classy moustache.

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Looks very like his sister. Has anyone ever seen them in the same room?

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David Anderson, Labour, Blaydon

Former miner who became a Unison official before entering parliament. Old fashioned left-winger, asker of awkward questions and Campaign Group member, but has backed Balls for the Leadership. Increased his majority back in May.

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Norman Baker, Liberal Democrat, Lewes

F***ing nutter and general skeevy creep extraordinaire. I look forward to the day when he's accused of raping badgers.

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Guto Bebb, Conservative, Aberconwy

Drives too fast down the Holyhead Road.

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He was actually a member of Plaid until 2001.

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Margaret Beckett, Labour, Derby South

Former hard-left factionalist, turned respectable front-bencher and now Party elder. MP for Derby South since 1983, previously a one term MP for Lincoln.

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She was a candidate to the left of Blair, but I think Prescott was regarded as the candidate of the Left with a big L, if only because Beckett's old comrades couldn't stand her by that point.

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Anne Begg, Labour, Aberdeen South

First MP to be a full-time wheelchair user. Her vote percentage has been amusingly stable over the years, reflecting a considerable personal vote in what is not exactly a natural Labour constituency:

1997: 35.3
2001: 39.8
2005: 36.7
2010: 36.5

Labour nearly finished fourth in Aberdeen South in the last Holyrood elections. I think the Westminster boundaries are more Labour friendly, but, yeah.

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Alan Beith, Liberal Democrat, Berwick-upon-Tweed

Former Deputy Leader of the Liberal Democrats. His majority was significantly reduced this year.

First elected in a fluke by-election upset in 1973 after the Tory incumbent's liking for prostitutes was revealed to the world by the News of the Screws, he managed to dig himself in well and his seat had been basically ignored by the Tories until this year. He will be 72 at the presumed time of the next election.

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Nicola Blackwood, Conservative, Oxford West and Abingdon

Caught Evan Harris napping.

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Clive Betts, Labour, Sheffield South East

Former leader of Sheffield City Council, ally of Blunkett. Also, openly gay and no one cares.

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Luciana Berger, Labour, Liverpool Wavertree

Partner of former Birmingham Erdington MP (and current internet activist) Sion Simon. Used to be the Director of Labour Friends of Israel. Won Wavertree by miles despite an extremely intense (and, according to some, ethically dubious) LibDem campaign. Think she's related to Manny Shinwell in some way or other.

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Roberta Blackman-Woods, Labour, City of Durham

An academic representing a university constituency. Presumably her academic background (she's a sociologist) helped to work out which bits of the constituency to focus on in the General Election, lol.

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David Blunkett, Labour, Sheffield, Brightside and Hillsborough (ironic, isn't it?)

Former Home Secretary and whatnot. The UK's first blind cabinet minister. Quite socially conservative.

And always has been, even when he was a terror of the tabloids back in the eighties. Actually represents the area he grew up in, which is unusual these days. Some of the background details of Harry Perkins in A Very British Coup are obviously based on his.

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Julian Brazier, Conservative, Canterbury

Worthless. Utterly worthless. A waste of space, a waste of oxygen. Also, once killed someone while speeding.

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Does that help explain why Canterbury is now the most marginal (or second most, I forget) seat in Kent?

Third most marginal (Dover +10.5, Maidstone +12.0, Canterbury +12.3), but, yeah. He's a really bad fit for the area, Canterbury itself being very much a university city.

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Kevin Brennan, Labour, Cardiff West

Rhodri Morgan's right-hand man for years. Ambitious; is running in the Shadow Cabinet elections. Has a very typical background for a South Wales MP these days; a teacher who's father was a steelworker.

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Will always be remembered for his opponent's campaign in the 1997 election.

Urgh, yes.

Also gave us all a bit of a fright this election when his declaration was televised; his body language, face expression and everything made it look as though he'd lost badly.

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James Brokenshire, Conservative, Old Bexley and Sidcup

An interesting surname....and constituency name.

Was MP for Hornchurch 2005-2010. But his constituency was abolished in boundary changes and he had to find a new electoral home. He had a lot of trouble being selected to an extent that it started to look pretty funny, but eventually lucked out with Ted Heath's old seat.

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There have been rumours. But to be in the Shadow Cabinet you have to run for election and there's almost no way that he'd do that now. Non ShadCab frontbench positions are picked by the Leader, though.

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Richard Burden, Labour, Birmingham, Northfield

Seems to be a bit of a leftie.

Yeah, but quite softly so. Of course in Brummie Labour that practically makes him a communist

Certainly not the sort of Labour MP you'd expect Northfield to have (and nothing like the ones it had in the past. Alright, Donald Chapman was an intellectual, but way out on the Gaitskellite Right, if I remember rightly), but he's a good solid local MP who's stood up for the betrayed MG Rover workforce.

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Aidan Burley, Conservative, Cannock Chase

Gained the seat from Labour this year on the highest swing to the Tories in the whole country (14%).

Cannock is weird and Rugeley is weirder.

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Alan Campbell, Labour, Tynemouth

Actually increased his majority in raw votes this year.

Boundary changes moved some solidly Labour estates and pit villages into his constituency. But, yeah, his result was still very impressive; he'd have held on easily enough on the pre-2010 boundaries. Tynemouth, long a flirt, has joined the sea of eternal red.

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Ronnie Campbell, Labour, Blyth Valley

A former coal miner, and pretty obviously on the Left of the Labour Party.

Yeah. Very much a 'character'. Quite socially conservative, except on gay rights issues. He actually had a very close race in 1987, though that had more to do with the weird goings on in and around Blyth since the early 70s rather than anything to do with him.

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Gregory Campbell, Democratic Unionist, East Londonderry

Nutter.