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Author Topic: The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy  (Read 179207 times)
incredibly specific types of post-punk music
BRTD
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« Reply #1125 on: February 16, 2012, 11:58:10 am »
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Oh Christ, what is your goal, to turn the boy into a Gay?
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« Reply #1126 on: February 16, 2012, 01:27:12 pm »
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I don't understand funny.
« Last Edit: February 16, 2012, 03:20:53 pm by Alcon »Logged

Do not fight with one another over my banning.  I've enjoyed the time I have spent with all of you, but the time really has come for me to leave.  It is what I want.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9Y_GLT4_9I

I looked over Jordan, and what did I see?
Coming for to carry me home,
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.

Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.
Badger
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« Reply #1127 on: February 16, 2012, 02:45:58 pm »

Dear students, faculty and staff,

I am writing you to serve notice that Mr. jmfcst is hereby expelled from The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy for inappropriate self promotion. This, as you know, is a serious offense and will not be taken lightly. We would kindly suggest, in an effort to help redeem himself and possibly gain re-admittance, that Mr. jmfcst instead engage in self promotion in the Atlas Deluge of Absurdity, Ignorance and Bad Posts.


Sincerely,

Keystone Phil

* wild cheering *
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Your self-serving slacktivism is propelling America to new heights.
Swing low, sweet chariot. Comin' for to carry me home.
jmfcst
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« Reply #1128 on: February 16, 2012, 04:07:44 pm »
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Dang...I’m not sure what is more pathetic:  Alcon’s overreach in rewriting my post, or Badger‘s desperate use of Keystone Phil’s material as a substitute for his own lack of originality.
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Do not fight with one another over my banning.  I've enjoyed the time I have spent with all of you, but the time really has come for me to leave.  It is what I want.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9Y_GLT4_9I

I looked over Jordan, and what did I see?
Coming for to carry me home,
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.

Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.
J. J.
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« Reply #1129 on: February 16, 2012, 06:07:04 pm »
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Possibly the most JJ-ish post ever:

The colors are wrong for the SS.  Traditionally the color for the SS background is black; this one is blue.

So it is either coincidence or they are saying, "I'm a Nazi that went to Penn State."

Made it!  Smiley
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J. J.

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The trouble is, in a democracy the whores are us." - P. J. O'Rourke

"Wa sala, wa lala."

(Zulu for, "You snooze, you lose.")
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« Reply #1130 on: February 16, 2012, 06:13:32 pm »
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Mike Naso doesn't understand women, part 3840393485:

Well, of course. Obama is a 100% perfect voting block for single women. They are much more willing to give second chances. Many women believe men will change. "I know he was bad, but he's trying...ect". "He promises to change this time, ect".
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jmfcst
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« Reply #1131 on: February 16, 2012, 06:15:38 pm »
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Mike Naso doesn't understand women, part 3840393485:

Well, of course. Obama is a 100% perfect voting block for single women. They are much more willing to give second chances. Many women believe men will change. "I know he was bad, but he's trying...ect". "He promises to change this time, ect".

that should cost him his man-bear award.
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Do not fight with one another over my banning.  I've enjoyed the time I have spent with all of you, but the time really has come for me to leave.  It is what I want.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9Y_GLT4_9I

I looked over Jordan, and what did I see?
Coming for to carry me home,
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.

Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.
Lief
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« Reply #1132 on: February 16, 2012, 06:18:58 pm »
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This thread leads me to believe he's broken up with that girl, so he should have his man-bear award taken away regardless.
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« Reply #1133 on: February 16, 2012, 10:59:35 pm »
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http://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149051.0

The entire thread
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Хahar
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« Reply #1134 on: February 17, 2012, 12:53:54 am »
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Gentlemen, please welcome a most unexpected visitor to these hallowed halls:

Santorum= Man on Dog
Romney= Dog on Car.

That was actually kind of amusing.
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The idea of parodying the preceding Atlasian's postings is laughable, of course, but not for reasons one might expect.
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« Reply #1135 on: February 17, 2012, 06:57:46 am »
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Gentlemen, please welcome a most unexpected visitor to these hallowed halls:

Santorum= Man on Dog
Romney= Dog on Car.

That was actually kind of amusing.

only because of the context; he posted it no differently than he would have his latest 'Harkin SafeD(47); ' autism spectrum therapy sesh but showed a flickering consciousness of the broader context.
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in a mirror, dimly lit
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« Reply #1136 on: February 17, 2012, 04:05:30 pm »
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I wonder how long it took Naso to write this with only one hand.
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Grumpy Santa's helpers.   Cheesy

Sibboleth
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« Reply #1137 on: February 17, 2012, 05:12:50 pm »
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A German President involved in some corruption stuffs??

The rapprochement between France and Germany becomes bigger and bigger.

You'd still have to work on it though. No way a French politician resigns.
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« Reply #1138 on: February 17, 2012, 05:16:06 pm »
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What the hell do you do with your girlfriend outside of eating dinner and listening to her complain if it isn't f**king the living s**t out of her?
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« Reply #1139 on: February 17, 2012, 09:24:04 pm »
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The Grey. Again.

Truly awesome.

Coincidentally, it could be an allegory for the 2012 Republican primaries/caucuses with Liam Neeson playing Mitt Romney, and the wolves representing Democratic Party special interests with Alpha Wolf Barack Obama and Omega Wolf John King (Think back to Newt's response to John's debate opener a few weeks ago). One of the human characters is even a black guy whose fate resembles the whimpering exit of Herman Cain. And look at how closely the "final four" in the movie parallel Mitt, Rick, Newt and Ron Paul LOL


READY FOR THE ALPHA WOLF
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It was either the ham sandwiches or Whataburger today.
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« Reply #1140 on: February 18, 2012, 10:03:41 am »
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He's obviously trolling at this point.
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« Reply #1141 on: February 18, 2012, 10:08:51 am »
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or at least, conscious that he is regarded as a troll and playing into it.

this largely describes Naso as well (though 'troll' is a harsh term in his case)
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« Reply #1142 on: February 18, 2012, 02:53:45 pm »
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With numbers like these, you'd think Massachusetts was Mitt's home state instead of Michigan.
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It was either the ham sandwiches or Whataburger today.
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« Reply #1143 on: February 18, 2012, 03:06:19 pm »
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Really, there's no point in posting Politico anymore, but this one tickled me especially:

That show Big Bang Theory is enormously popular among females. Chicks dig geeks. Chicks will dig Romney's geekiness.
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« Reply #1144 on: February 18, 2012, 07:50:08 pm »
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Really, there's no point in posting Politico anymore, but this one tickled me especially:

That show Big Bang Theory is enormously popular among females. Chicks dig geeks. Chicks will dig Romney's geekiness.

Damn, beat me to it.
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« Reply #1145 on: February 18, 2012, 11:02:43 pm »
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You realise you're not actually a fictional politician, just some guy on an obscure internet forum, right? Who is the intended audience of this vapid drivel?
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« Reply #1146 on: February 19, 2012, 09:55:50 am »
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funny cause it's true

...lunch is fantastic when it (1) involves alcohol, (2) lasts for at least 90 minutes and (3) involves friends.

What you have just described is illegal under neo-liberalism.  Get back to work!
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« Reply #1147 on: February 19, 2012, 10:12:49 am »
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I love the United States of America. I love her so much that it hurts and makes me angry, frustrated and saddened when I see her in bad shape.

All around the world in Human history we've seen attempts at Government and society that could better the lives of people. Sadly, most of these attempts failed. But, for almost 237 years now, the United States of America has remained the sole torch that carries the light of freedom around the world. Many other countries now live under monarchies, dictatorships, and even anarchy. But America remains freedom's last best hope. Where would people look to without the United States? Greece? France? China? It's a scary thought, which is exactly why we need to keep the fundamental principals of the United States alive and well for freedom's preservation.

Today, however, I see a bleak picture for the short term United States. I see a nation where people fear using the word God, which our country was founded on, which appears on our currency, because they are afraid that they may offend a select few people.

Government and higher-ups...must stay out of the lives of the American people. Don't tell us what doctor to go to, don't take the money we earn, don't tell us what we can feed our children in school lunches. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. President Ronald Reagan said, "I don't believe in a government that protects us from ourselves." Agreed, Mr. President.

The business of Government is NOT to control the American people. It's the job of the American people and the entrepreneurial spirit to help America run.

As Ronald Reagan also once said, "The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'" It couldn't be more true.

When I hear Republican candidates speak about "the two visions for America", I know exactly what they mean. I see a country where people are terrified to do or say what's fundamentally right for fear of insulting a very small fraction of people. I see a country where people do everything they can to recieve goods and services for free, not to save money, but just because they feel entitled to it. They are entitled to nothing. The unalienable rights they have to act that way are what they are entitled to. Just as Westboro protesters can stand near a Military funeral and protest in a disgraceful way, regardless of how despicable it is, that is their right. It is the same that Americans have the right to bear arms. It's fact. It's our constitution. It's what America was founded on.

That's the difference between the ideologies. In the majority of America, if you asks somebody what they are, they don't say "a firemen" or a "teacher"...they say, "A Christian". Outside of New England, the West Coast and Chicagoland, it's quite different. I've heard people say, you want to feel the pulse of America, come to Trenton, or New York. I disagree, the pulse of America is in the heartland.

So comes my fear for the next four years. Barack Obama is re-elected. My fear is that the election will show America's divisions. As is the case in virtually ever national election, women and African Americans will vote overwhelmingly for the Democrats, while white voters and men will vote overwhelmingly for the Republicans. However, this fall, I feel it will be exaggerated. I feel that men and whites will vote astoundingly for the Republican candidate, most likely Santorum, while African Americans and women will vote astoundingly for Obama. Thus no matter what occurs (and don't rule out a Santorum victory with an Obama popular vote win) America will appear more divided than ever before along racial and gender lines.

Barack Obama will take office again on January 20, 2013 and the second term curse begins. From Watergate to Iran Contra to Impeachment to Katrina/Economic Collapse. 1974, 1987, 1999, 2006....second term years that left a large negative on each of those four Presidents. It's of course too early to yet determine if Barack Obama will escape the same fate.

Then you have the midterms of 2014, which if Obama is re-elected, appear favorable for Republicans. Then a wide bench of non-flawed Republican candidates vs. a slim bench of older, unappealing Democratic candidates. Thus in November 2016, we elect a Republican President, continuing the politics of the last 16 years of one party succeeding the other.

But in my heart I know America will come back, it's just a question of if and when. I still see a country I love.

- Reaganfan
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« Reply #1148 on: February 19, 2012, 05:56:33 pm »
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I love the United States of America. Yes, I love her - from her rich abundance of fast food outlets to the alluring, almost sexual jags and curves of her coasts - and it hurts. I get angry, frustrated and saddened when I see her in bad shape, looking like a meth whore, her big 80s hair falling in ugly clumps from the national scalp.

For almost 237 years now, the United States of America has stood proud, the world's loudest and shrillest voice for the vague "Reaganesque" concepts I hold dear. Freedom. Liberty. God. Yes, America remains the mythical shining city on the hill (Reagan, 2:15 - "You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden."), but I fear the city is crumbling, decaying - overrun by ethnic groups of every hue under the sun, by hordes of marauding homosexuals, by groups of wild-eyed socialists, by fearsome militias of Black Panthers, and, yes, by Democrats. I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by political correctness, starving, hysterical naked, dragging themselves through San Francisco streets at dawn looking for a "fix". A "fix" of drugs.

I knew a woman once, and her name was Freedom. She was aging but vital, the righteous (and Right-eous) fire in her eyes more than making up for the sagging in her bosom and the distinguished crow's feet around her eyes. She had a stunning mess of blow-dried, blonde hair, improbably permed. We spoke of God and country, of small government and low taxes. She was twice my age, with two grown sons fighting overseas, and a third who was a Republican Congressman. She was, in short, what I called a 'cougar'.

We made love like animals, on a blanket underneath the stars. Afterward, I smoked a cigarette and pointed out the constellations. "That one's Reagan," I said, pointing. She took the cigarette out of my mouth and took a drag. "That one's Bush. That one -" I pointed at a cluster of stars resembling a weeping eagle "is Liberty".

Freedom looked at me for a very long time. "Liberty," she whispered. "Liberty," I replied with the kind of grin Tom Cruise gave in Top Gun, and kissed her.

Me and Freedom parted ways the next evening. I understood. I was a virile, if ginger, young man, and she was a mature woman with a deep sadness inside. As I turned to leave, throwing on my denim jacket, she grabbed my arm. "Remember to always vote Republican!" she said. I smiled. "Always do," I replied, and jumped on my horse, Gipper, casually tossing my ten gallon hat on my head.

As I rode off into the sunset that July night, I realised it was July 4th. Independence Day. I slid off Gipper and sat on the side of the road, staring out at the rugged landscape that surrounded me. Somewhere to the west, homosexual and drug-users were "partying" in San Francisco. To the east, degenerates and crack-fiends would be doing the same in New York city. But not here. Here was calm, and quiet. As I smoked another Lucky Strike, I glanced up at the stars, and saw the constellation I'd pointed out to Freedom last night.

I stared up at Reagan, twinkling in the black night, and a single tear rolled down my cheek. I stayed there like that for some time.

---

Anyway, what I'm saying is that Democrats are politically correct pussies, and that all non-whites will vote for Obama, and that everyone should vote for Rick Santorum. Rah-rah-Republicans!

Thank you, and God bless you. And God bless the United States of America.

- Oakvale.
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« Reply #1149 on: February 20, 2012, 03:18:52 am »
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Black robe and boxers

Santorum '12
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