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Author Topic: Romney ran as Independent  (Read 2742 times)
perdedor
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« Reply #25 on: April 15, 2012, 04:48:24 pm »
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[ ] Barack Obama (D)
[ ] Mitt Romney (R)
[ ] W. Mitt Romney (I)
[ ] W. M. Romney (I)
[ ] Willard M. Romney (Socialist Labor)
[ ] Willard Mitt Romney (Constitution)
[ ] Mittens Romney (Silly Hats Party)
[ ] Gromit Romney (Libertarian)
[ ] Tree-Loving Romney (Green)
[ ] MITTBOT 2.0 (MICROSOFT VISTA)

[ ] Milton Romney (Reform)
[ ] Mitchell Romney (Americans Elect)
[ ] Mitt W. Romney (Justice)
Mitt Willard Romney (Connecticut for Lieberman)
[] Mitt Romney (American Third Position Party)
[] Mitt Romney (CPUSA)
[] Mitt Romney (The John Bolton/Allen West Association for the Advancement of Hawkish Policy Party]
[]Mitt Romney (Write-in)
[]Opebo (Write-in)

[ ] Mitt Romney (Blue Enigma)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Modern Whig)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Republican Moderate)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Alaskan Independence)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Independence)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Aloha Aina)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Moderate)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Populist)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Ecology Democracy)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Grassroots)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Conservative)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Marijuana Reform)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Right To Life)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Taxpayers)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Progressive)
[ ] Mitt Romney (United Citizens)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Liberty Union)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Independent Greens)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Tax Revolt)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Progressive Dane)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Charter)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Rent Is 2 Damn High)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Working Families)
[ ] Mitt Romney (New Progressive)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Popular Democratic)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Puerto Rican Independence)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Movimiento Unión Soberanista)

Really, the only party that he cannot contort his values enough to run in is the Anti-Mormon Party (existed 1841-1844 in Illinois).

Where there's a Willard, there's a way.
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Lowly Griff
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« Reply #26 on: April 15, 2012, 05:33:41 pm »
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Is Mittosis performed like convention biological organisms undergo mitosis? Or is it more like an exponential increase in production capability, producing rates similar to mitosis?

Picture 1 is Mittosis Theory 1; Picture 2 is Mittosis Theory 2:




Mittosis is a severely aggressive biological process, impacting approximately 1 in 20 severely conservative governors. It would be comparable more to traditional mitosis in the way two Mitt Romneys are in effect created from one. Mitt Romneys are impervious to cancer, which is a symptom of the key underlying mechanism.

Whenever a flip-flop is made by a Mitt Romney, it is viewed by the body much like how a misread piece of genetic information would be read. Instead of causing cancerous tumors in the host Mitt Romney's ideology, however, the resulting error initiates a complex and instantaneous process whereby all the inconsistent positions taken by that Mitt Romney are transferred to the new Mitt Romney.

Whenever a flip-flop occurs, Mittosis occurs. This is a survival mechanism, as any one Mitt Romney actually has only one inconsistency (the initial flip-flop that created the Mitt in question). All of the combined inconsistencies are the cumulative output of all Mitt Romneys. Nobody has truly seen the potential devastation until now.
« Last Edit: April 15, 2012, 05:50:36 pm by Mittosis »Logged

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SJoyce
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« Reply #27 on: April 15, 2012, 06:15:10 pm »
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Is Mittosis performed like convention biological organisms undergo mitosis? Or is it more like an exponential increase in production capability, producing rates similar to mitosis?

Picture 1 is Mittosis Theory 1; Picture 2 is Mittosis Theory 2:




Mittosis is a severely aggressive biological process, impacting approximately 1 in 20 severely conservative governors. It would be comparable more to traditional mitosis in the way two Mitt Romneys are in effect created from one. Mitt Romneys are impervious to cancer, which is a symptom of the key underlying mechanism.

Whenever a flip-flop is made by a Mitt Romney, it is viewed by the body much like how a misread piece of genetic information would be read. Instead of causing cancerous tumors in the host Mitt Romney's ideology, however, the resulting error initiates a complex and instantaneous process whereby all the inconsistent positions taken by that Mitt Romney are transferred to the new Mitt Romney.

Whenever a flip-flop occurs, Mittosis occurs. This is a survival mechanism, as any one Mitt Romney actually has only one inconsistency (the initial flip-flop that created the Mitt in question). All of the combined inconsistencies are the cumulative output of all Mitt Romneys. Nobody has truly seen the potential devastation until now.

When the Mitts run out of parties to run in, do we begin to see multiple independent Mitts? Or do they start to create their own parties? Or will they start running for different offices?  How much in additional spending is this projected to cause for various elections departments?
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perdedor
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« Reply #28 on: April 15, 2012, 06:26:32 pm »
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Is Mittosis performed like convention biological organisms undergo mitosis? Or is it more like an exponential increase in production capability, producing rates similar to mitosis?

Picture 1 is Mittosis Theory 1; Picture 2 is Mittosis Theory 2:




Mittosis is a severely aggressive biological process, impacting approximately 1 in 20 severely conservative governors. It would be comparable more to traditional mitosis in the way two Mitt Romneys are in effect created from one. Mitt Romneys are impervious to cancer, which is a symptom of the key underlying mechanism.

Whenever a flip-flop is made by a Mitt Romney, it is viewed by the body much like how a misread piece of genetic information would be read. Instead of causing cancerous tumors in the host Mitt Romney's ideology, however, the resulting error initiates a complex and instantaneous process whereby all the inconsistent positions taken by that Mitt Romney are transferred to the new Mitt Romney.

Whenever a flip-flop occurs, Mittosis occurs. This is a survival mechanism, as any one Mitt Romney actually has only one inconsistency (the initial flip-flop that created the Mitt in question). All of the combined inconsistencies are the cumulative output of all Mitt Romneys. Nobody has truly seen the potential devastation until now.

When the Mitts run out of parties to run in, do we begin to see multiple independent Mitts? Or do they start to create their own parties? Or will they start running for different offices?  How much in additional spending is this projected to cause for various elections departments?

This comes to mind:
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Kalwejt
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« Reply #29 on: April 15, 2012, 06:43:25 pm »
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[ ] Barack Obama (D)
[ ] Mitt Romney (R)
[ ] W. Mitt Romney (I)
[ ] W. M. Romney (I)
[ ] Willard M. Romney (Socialist Labor)
[ ] Willard Mitt Romney (Constitution)
[ ] Mittens Romney (Silly Hats Party)
[ ] Gromit Romney (Libertarian)
[ ] Tree-Loving Romney (Green)
[ ] MITTBOT 2.0 (MICROSOFT VISTA)

[ ] Milton Romney (Reform)
[ ] Mitchell Romney (Americans Elect)
[ ] Mitt W. Romney (Justice)
Mitt Willard Romney (Connecticut for Lieberman)
[] Mitt Romney (American Third Position Party)
[] Mitt Romney (CPUSA)
[] Mitt Romney (The John Bolton/Allen West Association for the Advancement of Hawkish Policy Party]
[]Mitt Romney (Write-in)
[]Opebo (Write-in)

[ ] Mitt Romney (Blue Enigma)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Modern Whig)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Republican Moderate)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Alaskan Independence)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Independence)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Aloha Aina)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Moderate)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Populist)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Ecology Democracy)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Grassroots)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Conservative)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Marijuana Reform)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Right To Life)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Taxpayers)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Progressive)
[ ] Mitt Romney (United Citizens)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Liberty Union)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Independent Greens)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Tax Revolt)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Progressive Dane)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Charter)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Rent Is 2 Damn High)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Working Families)
[ ] Mitt Romney (New Progressive)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Popular Democratic)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Puerto Rican Independence)
[ ] Mitt Romney (Movimiento Unión Soberanista)

Really, the only party that he cannot contort his values enough to run in is the Anti-Mormon Party (existed 1841-1844 in Illinois).

Nah, he'd simply run an Anti-Mormon Mitt Romney as his stalking horse.
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« Reply #30 on: April 15, 2012, 06:50:55 pm »
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Christ this thread is funny. Well done people.
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Lowly Griff
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« Reply #31 on: April 15, 2012, 06:53:32 pm »
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When the Mitts run out of parties to run in, do we begin to see multiple independent Mitts? Or do they start to create their own parties? Or will they start running for different offices?  How much in additional spending is this projected to cause for various elections departments?

This comes to mind:


This is very much what we are facing. The duplication of Romneys is occurring at a rate far too rapid now to stop. It will only cease when no more positions on issues can be taken. On average, each Mitt Romney is undergoing Mittosis every three days or so. At that rate, we'll have millions of Romneys running around by the end of May.

Imagine the possibilities. They could run for every elected office in the country. Perhaps they'll cooperate on one of the Mitt Romney for President's campaigns and pull out all the stops. Mitt could fire all of his campaign staff and volunteers and replace them with Mitt Romneys.

Quote from: Mitt Romney
Some of my hardest working campaigners and volunteers are corporate buyout specialists.
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SJoyce
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« Reply #32 on: April 15, 2012, 07:16:05 pm »
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When the Mitts run out of parties to run in, do we begin to see multiple independent Mitts? Or do they start to create their own parties? Or will they start running for different offices?  How much in additional spending is this projected to cause for various elections departments?

This comes to mind:


This is very much what we are facing. The duplication of Romneys is occurring at a rate far too rapid now to stop. It will only cease when no more positions on issues can be taken. On average, each Mitt Romney is undergoing Mittosis every three days or so. At that rate, we'll have millions of Romneys running around by the end of May.

Imagine the possibilities. They could run for every elected office in the country. Perhaps they'll cooperate on one of the Mitt Romney for President's campaigns and pull out all the stops. Mitt could fire all of his campaign staff and volunteers and replace them with Mitt Romneys.

Quote from: Mitt Romney
Some of my hardest working campaigners and volunteers are corporate buyout specialists.

I've imagined a much better possibility than wasting them on elected offices. The federal government employs a couple million (I think like 2.6) people. By November, Mitt could run to Ron Paul's right, promising to shrink government by having the President fulfill every single job in the Executive Branch. A chicken in every pot, a car in every garage, and a Mitt in every post office!
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« Reply #33 on: April 15, 2012, 07:25:09 pm »
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lol, this thread is hilarious
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Lowly Griff
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« Reply #34 on: April 15, 2012, 07:26:32 pm »
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What if the Mitts start voting?

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« Reply #35 on: April 15, 2012, 07:28:31 pm »
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What if the Mitts start voting?



Each Mitt is so self-absorbed that it can only vote for itself.
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SJoyce
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« Reply #36 on: April 15, 2012, 07:29:26 pm »
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What if the Mitts start voting?



Is that voter fraud?
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Lowly Griff
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« Reply #37 on: April 15, 2012, 07:34:33 pm »
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What if the Mitts start voting?



Each Mitt is so self-absorbed that it can only vote for itself.

But theoretically, there may be more Mitts generated than can run for office, at least at the Presidential level. How many combinations can there be on every stance? Possibly more than the number of current voters in this country. It's also possible to have identical Mitts. If two different Mitts make two completely different Mitts due to random flip-flops, those two separate Mitts are still able to proceed to flip-flop and by chance, create two Mitts with the same positions. This will certainly happen many, many times before all combinations of stances are reached.
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Lowly Griff
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« Reply #38 on: April 15, 2012, 07:35:41 pm »
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What if the Mitts start voting?



Is that voter fraud?

Not if you're rich and white. Plus, each Mitt is a dynamic, unique creation (even the "duplicate Mitts" as mentioned above). Unfortunately, I do not believe each Mitt has his own money.
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« Reply #39 on: April 15, 2012, 07:41:03 pm »
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Christ this thread is funny. Well done people.
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SJoyce
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« Reply #40 on: April 15, 2012, 07:47:38 pm »
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What if the Mitts start voting?



Is that voter fraud?

Not if you're rich and white. Plus, each Mitt is a dynamic, unique creation (even the "duplicate Mitts" as mentioned above). Unfortunately, I do not believe each Mitt has his own money.

But only the original Mitt (henceforth referred to as The Original) is rich and white, due to the Mitts not having their own money (or do they have a large collective... reservoir-sized vault, I guess... of money that they share?). Also, could Mitt flip-flop on the issue of race itself, producing many different races of Mitts? Or on gender, making Mittita?
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« Reply #41 on: April 15, 2012, 08:12:05 pm »
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Mitt probably owns enough homes for each of his incarnations to have their own voting registration address.
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« Reply #42 on: April 15, 2012, 09:21:40 pm »
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Mitt probably owns enough homes for each of his incarnations to have their own voting registration address.

Actually (being semi-serious here) if you sold all the 17 or so properties associated with Mitt in recent years, you'd have hundreds of millions of dollars, so yeah, you probably could. It's just a question of whether he sells his MA townhouse, or his CA beachside mansion, or his NH summer home, or something else, just like the average American has to decide every day.
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« Reply #43 on: April 15, 2012, 11:33:09 pm »
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Christ this thread is funny. Well done people.
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Lowly Griff
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« Reply #44 on: April 16, 2012, 12:53:41 am »
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Is that voter fraud?

Not if you're rich and white. Plus, each Mitt is a dynamic, unique creation (even the "duplicate Mitts" as mentioned above). Unfortunately, I do not believe each Mitt has his own money.

But only the original Mitt (henceforth referred to as The Original) is rich and white, due to the Mitts not having their own money (or do they have a large collective... reservoir-sized vault, I guess... of money that they share?). Also, could Mitt flip-flop on the issue of race itself, producing many different races of Mitts? Or on gender, making Mittita?

Original Mitt owns the money, definitely. Even if he were subsidizing all the other Mitts, by July Mitt's current net worth - divided evenly among all Mitts - would equal less than $1.00 per person. Certainly there's a hierarchy of some sort, though. Respect for the one who gave birth to it.

As far as racial/gender combinations go:



When we're talking about millions of Mitts, there certainly is the possibility of anything. I'm assuming he would have to directly infer that he is a person of another race or a woman, but based on the flip-flops we've already seen, it's certainly possible. Statistically, I would say that most minority Mitts would be male, while most female Mitts would be white. This would be due to the fact that it would be more likely for any given Mitt to refer to itself as a women or of a different race than a woman of a different race.

Probably way under 1% of the total Mitts.

« Last Edit: April 16, 2012, 12:56:04 am by Mittosis »Logged

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« Reply #45 on: April 16, 2012, 02:39:42 am »
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And we need to go deeper...
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SJoyce
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« Reply #46 on: April 16, 2012, 06:47:27 am »
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Is that voter fraud?

Not if you're rich and white. Plus, each Mitt is a dynamic, unique creation (even the "duplicate Mitts" as mentioned above). Unfortunately, I do not believe each Mitt has his own money.

But only the original Mitt (henceforth referred to as The Original) is rich and white, due to the Mitts not having their own money (or do they have a large collective... reservoir-sized vault, I guess... of money that they share?). Also, could Mitt flip-flop on the issue of race itself, producing many different races of Mitts? Or on gender, making Mittita?

Original Mitt owns the money, definitely. Even if he were subsidizing all the other Mitts, by July Mitt's current net worth - divided evenly among all Mitts - would equal less than $1.00 per person. Certainly there's a hierarchy of some sort, though. Respect for the one who gave birth to it.

As far as racial/gender combinations go:



When we're talking about millions of Mitts, there certainly is the possibility of anything. I'm assuming he would have to directly infer that he is a person of another race or a woman, but based on the flip-flops we've already seen, it's certainly possible. Statistically, I would say that most minority Mitts would be male, while most female Mitts would be white. This would be due to the fact that it would be more likely for any given Mitt to refer to itself as a women or of a different race than a woman of a different race.

Probably way under 1% of the total Mitts.



Divided evenly, if there's just a dollar per Mitt, that means there's anywhere from 190 million to 250+ million Mitts roaming the streets... How do we feed them? And what if they turn violent?

And I think it was mentioned earlier that the syndrome affects 1/20 or so "severely conservative" governors... When does my state get overrun by multiple ones of these?



Will the Christie hordes and Walker hordes fight with each other and the Corbett hordes for control of Pennsylvania? Or will the Walker and Corbett hordes fight the Kasich hordes over Ohio? Will the Scott horde begin to flow north into your state, or will it go along the Panhandle into Mobile?
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« Reply #47 on: April 16, 2012, 07:49:46 am »
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Not that this would ever happen, but wouldn't someone have to run as the Republican candidate, in this scenario?


RON PAUL NINJA DELEGATES

I like this idea Smiley
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« Reply #48 on: April 16, 2012, 09:57:59 am »
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The hell is going on here?
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« Reply #49 on: April 16, 2012, 11:58:47 am »
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And we need to go deeper...
Mitt Romneys within Mitt Romneys? Are you advocating cannibalism?
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