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Author Topic: The previous poster on the RMS Titanic  (Read 1375 times)
PASOK Leader Hashemite
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« Reply #25 on: April 12, 2012, 06:16:01 pm »
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Would frantically try to finish a map of congressional elections in the 1890s in his cabin, and then would desperately try to get a lifeboat but wouldn't make it in time. He'd probably choose to go down, like a gentleman, clinging to his maps. Like every courageous man should do!
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Kalwejt
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« Reply #26 on: April 12, 2012, 07:52:05 pm »
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He'd make to the lifeboat but in a middle of the ocean his fellow passengers would throw him out, after he tried to engage them in a conversation of Carlos Luz's presidency.
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R2D2
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« Reply #27 on: April 12, 2012, 07:57:02 pm »
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Tries to save everyone, but out of drunkenness, he slips and hits his head, which results in unconsciousness. He perishes in the cold, alcohol-free water.
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It's amazing how desperate people get when they want to make unhealthy and unnatural things natural just to make the slim minority of those with socially, unethical, and unnatural logic feel a little better about their flaws.
Joe Republic
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« Reply #28 on: April 12, 2012, 08:16:23 pm »
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He was the watchman who failed to spot the iceberg.
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Real America demands to know.
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« Reply #29 on: April 12, 2012, 08:21:31 pm »
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He was the watchman who failed to spot the iceberg.

I saw it, but I was so emo that I just let everyone die because that's an emo thing to do.
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It's amazing how desperate people get when they want to make unhealthy and unnatural things natural just to make the slim minority of those with socially, unethical, and unnatural logic feel a little better about their flaws.
Senator Alfred F. Jones
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« Reply #30 on: April 12, 2012, 09:36:08 pm »
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Underage, but throws himself off the lifeboat 'cause he's emo.
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There is a lot of humor to be mined from this as the mind of LBJ in the body of an 18 month old baby girl is quite hilarious.

Alfred is the Atlasian equivalent of a malevolent deity.

President John Hay
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« Reply #31 on: April 12, 2012, 09:39:21 pm »
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One of the officers would shoot him for disrupting the evacuation process
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GM Napoleon
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« Reply #32 on: April 12, 2012, 10:01:22 pm »
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Last night bar fight.
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When I was in the third grade, I thought that I was Jewish
Because I could count, my nose was big, and I kept my bank account fullish
I told my mom, tears blurring my vision
He said, "Mort, you've loved God since before circumcision"
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« Reply #33 on: April 12, 2012, 10:04:54 pm »
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Slips into a lifeboat before it is lowered.
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Goodbye
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« Reply #34 on: April 12, 2012, 10:16:06 pm »
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Makes one of the last crowded life boats.
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« Reply #35 on: April 13, 2012, 03:08:37 am »
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Dies because he's part of the orchestra that is playing until the very end!
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afleitch
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« Reply #36 on: April 13, 2012, 05:06:13 am »

Last seen sipping a brandy in the smoking room.
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A-Bob
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« Reply #37 on: April 13, 2012, 02:57:47 pm »
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Sneaks onto a lifeboat.
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Governor Simfan
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« Reply #38 on: April 14, 2012, 12:08:57 pm »
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Sneaks onto a lifeboat.

Is too busy helping others get on the boat. Smiley
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R2D2
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« Reply #39 on: April 14, 2012, 12:27:41 pm »
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Saves Jon Huntsman, who was also on the boat, and dies in the process.
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It's amazing how desperate people get when they want to make unhealthy and unnatural things natural just to make the slim minority of those with socially, unethical, and unnatural logic feel a little better about their flaws.
Emperor Scott
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« Reply #40 on: April 14, 2012, 03:45:34 pm »
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Was too busy watching My Little Pony to care
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President John Hay
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« Reply #41 on: April 14, 2012, 03:53:18 pm »
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Unfortunately I think Scott would perish
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« Reply #42 on: April 14, 2012, 04:36:52 pm »
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Lets the women and children first, but when the ship sinks he goes into 'Nam mode and swims across the Atlantic.
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Robb the Survivor
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« Reply #43 on: April 14, 2012, 04:56:18 pm »
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He manages to find a place on a lifeboat, but is subsequently thrown out after other people get annoyed by his bad jokes.
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22:15   ComradeSibboleth   this is all extremely terrible and in all respects absolutely fycking dire.

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PASOK Leader Hashemite
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« Reply #44 on: April 14, 2012, 06:17:24 pm »
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He'd find his way to a lifeboat, if only to make sure he lives to see Sarkozy defeated Wink
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A-Bob
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« Reply #45 on: April 14, 2012, 06:29:20 pm »
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Decides to go down with a brandy.
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Kalwejt
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« Reply #46 on: April 15, 2012, 11:48:35 am »
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Decides to sacrifice his life by giving his place on liveboat to Newt Gingrich.
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« Reply #47 on: April 15, 2012, 12:18:20 pm »
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Shoots the Captain in the f***ing face, turns the ship around, and finds Greenland.  Everybody rejoices.
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23:19   Xahar   you're literally a white dude Mechaman
PASOK Leader Hashemite
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« Reply #48 on: April 15, 2012, 12:22:39 pm »
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Gets rip-roaring drunk and fools around, going down in style.
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« Reply #49 on: April 15, 2012, 11:38:38 pm »
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Walks calmly into the water making its way up the boat deck and disappears.  A few days later he is seen walking out of the ocean and onto the shores of Canada, only to catch a train home as if nothing happened.  There was no time to be cold, he had to get back to make some more french election maps!
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