What would happen if the following posters become Pope?

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Keystone Phil
opebo
BRTD
Nathan
Simfan
NY Jew
TJ
J. J.
Oldiesfreak
Inks
Xahar
Lief
Harry

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

We're doomed.

[The world will shine with light in our nightmare]

Jesus would be coming back a lot sooner with most of these folks in office, that's for sure.

[Lief 🗽]

I would restore the Papacy to its traditional values: hard drinking, bastard children, wars against the rival city states, excommunicating my enemies, and lots of indulgences to fund it all.

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

Keystone Phil
opebo
BRTD
Nathan
Simfan
NY Jew
TJ
J. J.
Oldiesfreak
Inks
Xahar
Lief
Harry

I think this is one of those times where it's more fun if the OP volunteers his own answers first.

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

I would make a good damn pope.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

I would restore the Papacy to its traditional values: hard drinking, bastard children, wars against the rival city states, excommunicating my enemies, and lots of indulgences to fund it all.

Endorsed!

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Keystone Phil - Attacks on all sorts of "social justice" movements, Rick Santorum appointed to some powerful Vatican position.

opebo - Vatican moved to Thailand, constant scandals lead to schisms and death of church.

BRTD - I already said in the other thread what I would decree. And priests would have to wear jeans. And olds would quit going to Mass after the requirements I institute for the music.

Nathan - Pretty similar except liberalizing...probably one of the few people who'd start ordaining women but not end the celibacy requirement.

Simfan - He'd change the Vatican dress code and it'd be somehow even more ridiculous.

NY Jew - ...uh...

TJ - Status quo basically.

J. J. - The number of infallible proclamations would greatly increase, resulting in a schism.

Oldiesfreak - Schism after attempts to implement sabbatarianism, and further schism due to none of his decrees making any sense.

Inks - The most authoritarian Pope since Borgia.

Xahar- Schism after authority of Mohammaed recognized.

Lief - He said above.

Harry - Schism with most of the church rejecting his liberal reforms, his new "church" effectively becomes identical to a traditional mainline Protestant one and everyone wonders why he was even Catholic in the first place.

[Kaine for Senate '18]

Inks - The most authoritarian Pope since Borgia.

You don't really have a grasp of history, do you?

[Grumpier Than Thou]

I'm declaring myself Pope on March 1st at Midnight.

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

I'm declaring myself Pope on March 1st at Midnight.

Long live Pope Joan II! Ba dum ching.

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

There's no way I'd ever become Pope... there'd be a LOT of changes if I was.

[patrick1]

There's no way I'd ever become Pope... there'd be a LOT of changes if I was.

But Inks, what of the 2000 year old Terms of Service....

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

There's no way I'd ever become Pope... there'd be a LOT of changes if I was.

But Inks, what of the 2000 year old Terms of Service....

I don't recall anything about condoms in the Bible or the idea that you can pray to a dead Pope and he'll "intercede" on your behalf, leading to a "miracle", so that person should be made a Saint.  I don't ever remember seeing anything about praying to God "through" Mary.  I don't recall reading about Purgatory either.  I could go on for a while...

[Keystone Phil]

Inks has become the biggest douchebag. Ever. I mean, he's using fairly typical ignoramus Protestant talking points but just generally a douchebag.

[patrick1]

There's no way I'd ever become Pope... there'd be a LOT of changes if I was.

But Inks, what of the 2000 year old Terms of Service....

I don't recall anything about condoms in the Bible or the idea that you can pray to a dead Pope and he'll "intercede" on your behalf, leading to a "miracle", so that person should be made a Saint.  I don't ever remember seeing anything about praying to God "through" Mary.  I don't recall reading about Purgatory either.  I could go on for a while...

And for that I award you 10 infraction inquisitions. We will put you on mute just like Galileo.

[Keystone Phil]

I love idiots like Inks: would surely rail against people that take the Bible too literally but if something isn't specifically spelled out there, it doesn't matter.

[Sopranos Republican]

Jesus would be coming back a lot sooner with most of these folks in office, that's for sure.

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

Phil, nothing of what I said was incorrect.  I have some serious problems with Catholic doctrine.  The opposition to birth control other than family planning is very legalistic, and that's not the point of Christianity.  Christianity is not a hard set list of dos and don'ts.  Yes, there are the 10 Commandments, but there are sins other than those, and the Catholic Church, like the Jewish leaders in Jesus's time have become too focused on strictly applying rules.

Some of the doctrines of the Church smack straight up of heresy, such as Papal infallibility.

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

There's no way I'd ever become Pope... there'd be a LOT of changes if I was.

But Inks, what of the 2000 year old Terms of Service....

I don't recall anything about condoms in the Bible or the idea that you can pray to a dead Pope and he'll "intercede" on your behalf, leading to a "miracle", so that person should be made a Saint.  I don't ever remember seeing anything about praying to God "through" Mary.  I don't recall reading about Purgatory either.  I could go on for a while...

And for that I award you 10 infraction inquisitions. We will put you on mute just like Galileo.

I actually knew a guy who defended the inquisition and the Crusades.

[Kitteh]

Nathan would actually make a good pope. The others, no.

[Antonio the Sixth]

Nathan would actually make a good pope. The others, no.

Yeah, Nathan is one of few people who could genuinely make religion better, and give it some real meaning.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Well me and Inks might disagree on how Jesus would take an approach to forum moderation, but we definitely agree here!

Inks, are you a charismatic?

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

Nathan would actually make a good pope. The others, no.

Yeah, Nathan is one of few people who could genuinely make religion better, and give it some real meaning.

This is one of the nicest (and least deserved!) compliments I've ever been given. Thank you so much, Antonio.

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

Well me and Inks might disagree on how Jesus would take an approach to forum moderation, but we definitely agree here!

Inks, are you a charismatic?

No.