The Confession Booth: Post something very personal about yourself

[JerryArkansas]

I didn't realize that middle-class white men were the authority on defining sexual assault against women.

Have you ever been raped? Sorry, but claiming that cyberbullying of rich white teenagers in the first world is in the same category as actual rape is pretty offensive. You should be ashamed for not only trying to defend the suggestion that it is, but implying that those criticizing that suggestion are somehow misogynists for claiming that rich first world teenagers getting perverted comments online is not the same as people being actually raped.

Thank you for saying this, as someone who has been the victim of such crimes, it helps to see responses like this.

[IceSpear]

My diet is scarily similar to Bushie's.

- Mostly processed/microwavable/quick oven foods.
- Fast food or pizza a couple times a week.
- Mostly drink iced tea instead of water.
- Very little fruits/vegetables.

I'm better off because I consume much less than he does (obviously), do drink water occasionally, don't pig out on oreo/ice cream desserts constantly, and a few other things. I also exercise which helps keep me thin. But yeah, it's a bit unsettling.

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

I guess I have a dumb little confession to make, about something rather silly on the greater scale of things.

So I'm really bummed out by Joan Rivers dying. Like really, really bummed out. I have been saddened by the death of celebrities before, but never like this. It’s not that I am saddened because I was a huge fan-I was a fan, but I never went out of my way to watch her on TV. I never thought that she was any more interesting or funny than any other comedian, like Louis CK and so on. I don’t quite know why I am so depressed. Maybe it was just another punch in the gut after a series of other events that has pushed me over the edge back into yet another slump. I just don’t know why I was so emotionally invested in her sudden health deterioration and death, but here I am. I guess that’s kind of embarrassing. I guess not.

Edit: I figured it out. Joan Rivers always reminded me of my grandmother. My grandmother is also extremely funny (not brutal like Joan Rivers, but she has a good sense of humor) and we are extremely close. And if you ever heard Joan Rivers on TV or on the radio, you would know how much she cared for her daughter and grandson. I think that is what is drawing such an emotional reaction. I am watching the River's family experience what I fear most.

I didn't realize that middle-class white men were the authority on defining sexual assault against women.

Have you ever been raped? Sorry, but claiming that cyberbullying of rich white teenagers in the first world is in the same category as actual rape is pretty offensive. You should be ashamed for not only trying to defend the suggestion that it is, but implying that those criticizing that suggestion are somehow misogynists for claiming that rich first world teenagers getting perverted comments online is not the same as people being actually raped.

Thank you for saying this, as someone who has been the victim of such crimes, it helps to see responses like this.

I'm sorry you've been through something like this. I can't imagine going through such a horrible thing. You're clearly a great guy and will survive through such a thing .

[Sol]

Well I hope you decide against that last idea no matter what situation you find yourself in. But based on comments you've made in the past things make a little more sense. Depression is a c**nt, I hope you can cope. Don't put up a front with everyone, though, you need to be open to get emotional support from people close to you.

And what is your definition for "on track"? Plenty of people don't have any idea what they want until they're 50, or think at 30 that they are a success but later look back and think they were completely wrong. I hope you can find genuine happiness wherever you end up.

I second this. Don't be afraid to reach out and get support- people want to help.

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

- Fast food or pizza a couple times a week.

If it's not daily it's not Bushie.

[Oakvale]

This thread must be sent to hell.

[Dr. Cynic]

One of the periods where I was gone from here for a long time, I was homeless... I mean, literally... I had no place to go. I slept outside and I actually washed my clothes in a creek... I once slept in a long abandoned house that had no electric, no power, nothing. It was just a place I could use as cover from the rain where I could put my mattress. I am extraordinarily lucky that I was able to pull myself out.

I also almost killed myself when I was 20 and I'm a recovering alcoholic. No booze in 3 years now... Little more than that, actually.

That's about as personal as it gets for me.

[ilikeverin]

When I see some of the older gay guys who graduated before me post about gay stuff on Facebook, it absolutely sickens me how shallow and pathetic the gay "community" is. It makes me ashamed to be gay. I want no part in a culture that values belittling and bullying others to prop one's self up, accumulating material possessions/monetary wealth, constantly partying/drinking/doing drugs/having promiscuous sex, and judges others based on looks. It goes against absolutely everything I believe in and stand for. 

This will change as you get into the community and meet more gay dudes.  Not that your opinion of guys who are like that will (necessarily) change, but you'll realize the community is a whole lot bigger and a whole lot more diverse than the guys who like putting themselves out there like that all the time.

[Flake]

When I see some of the older gay guys who graduated before me post about gay stuff on Facebook, it absolutely sickens me how shallow and pathetic the gay "community" is. It makes me ashamed to be gay. I want no part in a culture that values belittling and bullying others to prop one's self up, accumulating material possessions/monetary wealth, constantly partying/drinking/doing drugs/having promiscuous sex, and judges others based on looks. It goes against absolutely everything I believe in and stand for.  

I have the same problem, especially with more flamboyant guys, the ones I met (and there are very few who do not meet that description) are always complaining about how they're not having sex, they always judge others all the time, they complain/bitch about the smallest things, they overreact about everything, they're so dramatic when someone criticizes them for being rude, and it's just awful to me, you know? These guys are representing everyone in the community, and they just perpetuate the stereotype.

[Sol]

I don't think many people really give a sh**t but I saw this thread and it's a good enough venue.

Over the last year I've had more recurrent thoughts about suicide than ever before. Letting go of your own life interests me and I don't hold much against those who believe it's their best option. There was only one point when I came close to actually committing the deed, which was a few years ago when my grades in school plummeted and my social life was virtually nonexistent by that point. The thoughts have sprouted back up again because I've been unhappy with my living situation. At my age, I still live under a household with a man who's directed the worst sort of verbal abuse towards me, and who's constantly undermined my self-esteem, for the last two decades. He's clingy as hell and is doing everything he can to have me remain as his dependent. I don't have the financial resources to live on my own for more than a couple of months yet, so I'm stuck here. There are many days when I feel as if I have little control over my life. I doubt I would act out in any way, but maybe I should seek therapy or something.

Don't be afraid to get help! A therapist can definitely help you get to where you want to be.

[World politics is up Schmitt creek]

I am moderately embarrassed by the fact that I went to a public school.

As am I by the fact that I went to a private school.

[Simfan34]

I am moderately embarrassed by the fact that I went to a public school.

As am I by the fact that I went to a private school.

Can we switch?

[🦀🎂🦀🎂]

Simfan, you should move to the UK and tell everyone you went to a "public school". You might have to bluff some of the arcane details of the arcane public schools (possibly make one up, Eton and Harrow might be too on the nose) but you'll get a thumbs up from the upper middle-class.

[World politics is up Schmitt creek]

I am moderately embarrassed by the fact that I went to a public school.

As am I by the fact that I went to a private school.

Can we switch?

You would not have liked my school.

[/]

I don't have any real friends.

[Simfan34]

I am moderately embarrassed by the fact that I went to a public school.

As am I by the fact that I went to a private school.

Can we switch?

You would not have liked my school.

Would I have heard of it?

Simfan, you should move to the UK and tell everyone you went to a "public school". You might have to bluff some of the arcane details of the arcane public schools (possibly make one up, Eton and Harrow might be too on the nose) but you'll get a thumbs up from the upper middle-class.

Charterhouse? Worksop? Blue Coat?

Maybe I should do the same here. Claim I went to somewhere less... pedestrian than Suburban High School. Blair Academy, perhaps? Possibly a bit too close to home, but I'm reasonably familliar.

I should have done it for real back in middle school. Applied for a minority scholarship and everything. I know quite a few people who did that, actually. Now I have this permanent stain on my record.

[HagridOfTheDeep]

I resent people who are richer than me, even though by most measures I'm a spoiled greedy child.

It seemed topical.

[World politics is up Schmitt creek]

I am moderately embarrassed by the fact that I went to a public school.

As am I by the fact that I went to a private school.

Can we switch?

You would not have liked my school.

Would I have heard of it?

Almost certainly not.

[afleitch]

I went to a private school. It was what it was. Nothing to gloat or get hung up over in equal measure. Though it did permanently affect my accent which feeds back into the whole 'you must have went to school x' thing.

[Cassius]

I am moderately embarrassed by the fact that I went to a public school.

As am I by the fact that I went to a private school.

Can we switch?

You would not have liked my school.

Would I have heard of it?

Simfan, you should move to the UK and tell everyone you went to a "public school". You might have to bluff some of the arcane details of the arcane public schools (possibly make one up, Eton and Harrow might be too on the nose) but you'll get a thumbs up from the upper middle-class.

Charterhouse? Worksop? Blue Coat?

Maybe I should do the same here. Claim I went to somewhere less... pedestrian than Suburban High School. Blair Academy, perhaps? Possibly a bit too close to home, but I'm reasonably familliar.

I should have done it for real back in middle school. Applied for a minority scholarship and everything. I know quite a few people who did that, actually. Now I have this permanent stain on my record.

Wear having been to a comp (or in the American vernacular public school) like a badge of honour.

[Simfan34]

Wear having been to a comp (or in the American vernacular public school) like a badge of honour.

Impossible.

[Cassius]

Wear having been to a comp (or in the American vernacular public school) like a badge of honour.

Impossible.

Nah it's not. In fact, I'd say if you went to a school that wasn't particularly well-respected, or known for offering high standards of education or producing men of great import and fame, then to go on from that background and do well for yourself does you more credit than if you'd been to the grandest of private schools. I mean, my comprehensive wasn't terrible (as indeed the vast majority of British comps aren't) - it wasn't good, but it wasn't awful. But I still feel a much greater sense of pride and satisfaction having been to a comp and achieved some respectable grades and gone on to a decent university than I would have done had I attended a private school and done the same. I mean, if I'd attended a private school throughout my schooling, as opposed to when I was but a young boy, there might've been a debating club, we might have sung hymns in regular assemblies, there might have been a sense of community and togetherness that you don't perhaps, get to the same extent at many comps. But, in the end, that was all a bit superfluous - I got to witness other things; girls who got pregnant in their early teens, a boy who tried to beat a teacher with chair, administrative shambles after administrative shambles - and I went to a comparatively decent comp in a fairly affluent area (although it did take quite a few from the not so affluent areas surrounding our patch of countryside).

Going to a comprehensive school prepared me for life far better than a private school would have (which, incidentally, is what my father drummed into my head when I was bullied in the first couple of years I was there for having a posh accent, being a little on the chubby side and being a little too fond of the sound of my own voice). I learned to work independently, because most of the teachers had zero interest in doing much beyond the minimum of what was expected because they weren't paid particularly well and had to deal with a load of ghastly bastards (which children of secondary school age are) on a day to day basis. I learned to keep my mouth shut, be aware of what others thought of me; I learned how to take mindless abuse and dish it back out with interest. Of course, not everybody who was educated full time at a private school is a spoon-fed, naive dipsh**t; however, many of them are. Although, in all fairness, I did receive a fair amount of help from my mother and father, something that a lot of the kids I knew didn't unfortunately.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is this; comprehensive/public schools have their merits. They may not be grand institutions with storied histories, hundreds of famous alumni and cash flowing from every orifice, but they are nonetheless a challenge. To get through them in good shape for the future and as a more rounded and capable person, as I believe I did, is something to be proud of.

*As a note, plenty of British private schools are absolute dogs bollocks, and probably do contain a handful of the things I ascribed to comprehensive schools above. Bu you know, I can only report what I witness myself and what I hear, and I never heard about a teacher getting a knife pulled on her a private school (although I'm sure there is an example out there somewhere if someone is diligent enough to find it).

[pikachu]

Maybe I should do the same here. Claim I went to somewhere less... pedestrian than Suburban High School. Blair Academy, perhaps? Possibly a bit too close to home, but I'm reasonably familliar.

I should have done it for real back in middle school. Applied for a minority scholarship and everything. I know quite a few people who did that, actually. Now I have this permanent stain on my record.

Having gone to an NJ private, I really question their value over the generic NJ suburban high school and how much respect you get from going there...

[Simfan34]

I must say Cassius, I have much respect for your experience after reading of it.

[Cassius]

I must say Cassius, I have much respect for your experience after reading of it.

Why thank you Simfan (assuming you were being serious ), but I didn't have things badly; I experienced some pretty nasty bullying in the first couple of years of secondary school, and a little snobbery when I went to a Prep school before that, but I'm not the first, nor I will be the last, kid to experience those things. Indeed, experiencing them did me a fair amount of good I believe.