Study: Lesbian Couples Twice as Likely to Divorce as Gay Couples

[DC Al Fine]

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/lesbian-couples-twice-as-likely-as-gay-men-to-end-civil-partnership-as-divorces-up-by-20-8866454.html

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One small quibble with the article. Bukodim suggested that the average age of marriage might be a cause for the difference in divorce rates. In straight relationships, the data shows there's a huge decrease in divorce rate as the age of marriage increases. Young marriages, especially those of couples under 18, are often due to pregnancy or immaturity, and people of higher socioeconomic status tend to delay marriage to start careers, so it makes sense that younger marriages have weaker foundations on average.

The problem is that this advantage is negligible in straight couples from about age 25 on. Bukodim's explanation doesn't make sense with homosexual couples where the average age is 37.6 for women and 40 for men. Presumably over 35's aren't pregnant and are reasonably mature, which suggests that age is not a factor in the difference in divorce rates.

[Adam Griffin]

Anecdotally, I'm not surprised. I am also reminded of a scene from Archer where Lana asks Cyril, "What are you? A lesbian?" when he hints at moving in together after a few weeks of dating.

[dead0man]

There are things in relationships that a man will let slide but a woman would have to make an issue of.  Plus, women in relationships remember EVERY.LITTLE.THING. that happens in that relationship, whereas men will forget (if not forgive).  Times that by two and I think you are a long ways towards figuring out the disparity in numbers here.


...but then again, "lol men!" so we're probably going to take sh**t from the ivory towers for even considering discussing this subject.

[opebo]

There's virtually no motivation to stay together when neither party wants sex and only wants to take advantage of the other.

[minionofmidas]

Interesting.

[afleitch]

One small quibble with the article. Bukodim suggested that the average age of marriage might be a cause for the difference in divorce rates. In straight relationships, the data shows there's a huge decrease in divorce rate as the age of marriage increases. Young marriages, especially those of couples under 18, are often due to pregnancy or immaturity, and people of higher socioeconomic status tend to delay marriage to start careers, so it makes sense that younger marriages have weaker foundations on average.

A few points. Firstly women tend to be disproportionately the instigators of divorce. Secondly rates of 6.1 for lesbians and 3.2 for gays after 7 years is quite good. While it will take a while for stats to go through the system the rates according the the ONS are around 13% for heterosexual couples. We know using data from 2000 in Belgium and 1989 in Denmark plus some ddata from a 2011 study in the USA that the dissolution/divorce rates for same sex couples seem to be around half that of straight couples.

Which leads to, what might be uncomfortable for some, the understanding that male/male couples are the least likely to divorce out of any union.

[Leftbehind]

There are things in relationships that a man will let slide but a woman would have to make an issue of.  Plus, women in relationships remember EVERY.LITTLE.THING. that happens in that relationship, whereas men will forget (if not forgive).  Times that by two and I think you are a long ways towards figuring out the disparity in numbers here.


...but then again, "lol men!" so we're probably going to take sh**t from the ivory towers for even considering discussing this subject.

It'd be a crying shame to miss more stunning insights/regurgitated clichés.

[Gustaf]

There's virtually no motivation to stay together when neither party wants sex and only wants to take advantage of the other.

Not all women are paid prostitutes, old chap.

[opebo]

There's virtually no motivation to stay together when neither party wants sex and only wants to take advantage of the other.

Not all women are paid prostitutes, old chap.

[deleted].

[minionofmidas]

in be4 Lewis points out traditional Navajo views on that question again... oh wait. Too late.

Sex without payment by the man is a deeply amoral, indeed a taboo, thing to do. Either you pay with gifts or money, or you purchase a flatrate, as it were, by moving in with her and her people and paying with your labour.

[TNF]

Bold prediction: This thread will not end well

[opebo]

Bold prediction: This thread will not end well

Apparently the entire point of view expressed by myself (see the deleted post above) and Lewis Trondheim is completely disallowed from the forum:

Simply that without a gullible, dick-led man in the relationship, a lesbian marriage is simply two con-artists trying to get the better of the other:  rather a dead end.

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

Bold prediction: This thread will not end well

Apparently the entire point of view expressed by myself (see the deleted post above) and Lewis Trondheim is completely disallowed from the forum:

Simply that without a gullible, dick-led man in the relationship, a lesbian marriage is simply two con-artists trying to get the better of the other:  rather a dead end.

opebo, first of all: That's a load of bull; second of all: Have you ever read Tanizaki's Manji?

[Grumpier Than Thou]

I'm sure gay sex is much more enjoyable than lesbian sex.

[afleitch]

I'm sure gay sex is much more enjoyable than lesbian sex.

Gay sex is like a rocket to the moon.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

I'm sure gay sex is much more enjoyable than lesbian sex.

Gay sex is like a rocket to the moon.

Is the rocket shaped like a dick?

[Kitteh]

ITT:

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Also:

[opebo]

...without a gullible, dick-led man in the relationship, a lesbian marriage is simply two con-artists trying to get the better of the other:  rather a dead end.

opebo, first of all: That's a load of bull; second of all: Have you ever read Tanizaki's Manji?

I have not.

ITT:

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Also:

I never said they mightn't 'do it well' (a subjective and ephemeral concept anway).  What I was pointing out is the motivations for engaging in the relationship at all are sorely lacking.  In a m-f relationship the male gets a bit of sex and the woman gets all she trades for the sex... in a m-m relationship they both get sex... and in a f-f relationship what do they get?  It is problematic because they can't both get the better of the other.

[Kitteh]

I never said they mightn't 'do it well' (a subjective and ephemeral concept anway).  What I was pointing out is the motivations for engaging in the relationship at all are sorely lacking.  In a m-f relationship the male gets a bit of sex and the woman gets all she trades for the sex... in a m-m relationship they both get sex... and in a f-f relationship what do they get?

sex

ITT:

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[Clarko95 📚💰📈]

I'm sure gay sex is much more enjoyable than lesbian sex.

Gay sex is like a rocket to the moon.

[Kitteh]

I'm sure gay sex is much more enjoyable than lesbian sex.

Gay sex is like a rocket to the moon.

I doubt 32% of gay men had multiple orgasms the last time they had sex

srsly tho I'm of the opinion that gay sex is better than straight sex regardless of the genders involved. not sure beyond that.

[Gustaf]

Bold prediction: This thread will not end well

Apparently the entire point of view expressed by myself (see the deleted post above) and Lewis Trondheim is completely disallowed from the forum:

Simply that without a gullible, dick-led man in the relationship, a lesbian marriage is simply two con-artists trying to get the better of the other:  rather a dead end.

You make the faulty assumption that your poor experiences with women and inability to have normal relationships is due to some general failings of humanity and the world. But I'm afraid it's more to do with you.

See, in my experience women enjoy sex rather a lot. And don't try to rip you off. And I on my side don't want relationships just for the sex either.

It makes sense that you would get this idea if all your intimate interaction comes from prostitutes, but you need to realize that you are being extremely narrow-minded and naive.

[opebo]

I never said they mightn't 'do it well' (a subjective and ephemeral concept anway).  What I was pointing out is the motivations for engaging in the relationship at all are sorely lacking.  In a m-f relationship the male gets a bit of sex and the woman gets all she trades for the sex... in a m-m relationship they both get sex... and in a f-f relationship what do they get?

sex

ITT:

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You're being silly.  I never base my analysis on anecdotal evidence - in fact like anyone else, women appeared to 'want sex' with me when I was young, and it still occurs very rarely.  The point is you look at the structure of society - the evidence is that they hardly want it at all compared to men in general. 

You make the faulty assumption that your poor experiences with women and inability to have normal relationships is due to some general failings of humanity and the world. But I'm afraid it's more to do with you.

See, in my experience women enjoy sex rather a lot. And don't try to rip you off. And I on my side don't want relationships just for the sex either.

It makes sense that you would get this idea if all your intimate interaction comes from prostitutes, but you need to realize that you are being extremely narrow-minded and naive.

You're being just as silly as drj.  My relationships with women have been excellent, above the average I'm quite sure.  Lots of pretty girlfriends when I was young.

I'm basing my analysis on looking at society, not my own anecdotal experience.  Open your eyes and look around you, Gustaf.  You are like I was young, rich, etc.  Look at how the whole world works, and think about your own future, don't just look right in front of your sex-addled nose.

[Gustaf]

I never said they mightn't 'do it well' (a subjective and ephemeral concept anway).  What I was pointing out is the motivations for engaging in the relationship at all are sorely lacking.  In a m-f relationship the male gets a bit of sex and the woman gets all she trades for the sex... in a m-m relationship they both get sex... and in a f-f relationship what do they get?

sex

ITT:

You must be logged in to read this quote.

You're being silly.  I never base my analysis on anecdotal evidence - in fact like anyone else, women appeared to 'want sex' with me when I was young, and it still occurs very rarely.  The point is you look at the structure of society - the evidence is that they hardly want it at all compared to men in general. 

You make the faulty assumption that your poor experiences with women and inability to have normal relationships is due to some general failings of humanity and the world. But I'm afraid it's more to do with you.

See, in my experience women enjoy sex rather a lot. And don't try to rip you off. And I on my side don't want relationships just for the sex either.

It makes sense that you would get this idea if all your intimate interaction comes from prostitutes, but you need to realize that you are being extremely narrow-minded and naive.

You're being just as silly as drj.  My relationships with women have been excellent, above the average I'm quite sure.  Lots of pretty girlfriends when I was young.

I'm basing my analysis on looking at society, not my own anecdotal experience.  Open your eyes and look around you, Gustaf.  You are like I was young, rich, etc.  Look at how the whole world works, and think about your own future, don't just look right in front of your sex-addled nose.

Since female sexuality is generally so repressed it's probably true that they want it a bit less on average in the status quo. That's a far cry from your statement, that women trade sex for money in relationships. But, sure, cite your evidence then, if you have it.

I think that if you had had as great a time with women as you claim you wouldn't despise them so much. But I'll admit that it's almost as speculative from me as your entire worldview.

[Kitteh]

Forgive me for not believing boasts of sexual and romantic success from a guy who's method of getting sex is paying foreign prostitutes.