The t_host1 Institute of Comedy

[Simfan34]

My term's three weeks, not two weeks. And how can you say that a party that almost (but not quite) supported TNF's platform - the platform of a man with a far lower E score than you - is insufficiently left-wing? I don't recall Napoleon being a major force within the Labor Party; what you're doing is (forgive the indulgence in fantasy here) saying the Democrats are right-wing because of Evan Bayh - literally the Tea Party of the Atlasian left.

The term is not yours Alfred it's Senator Deus.

The term is mine. Have you looked at the votes?

Can the votes be found in Leviticus?

I did hear something about a few outstanding precincts in Song of Songs.

[Simfan34]

Glorious news!

I was feeling inspired from one of Fox's latest charts, so I thought I'd make one to celebrate the occasion:

[Simfan34]

Alberto of course, as it is the source of over 90% of the world supply of VO5.

[Simfan34]

     It annoys me too. These people are allegedly educated, and yet their grasp of language and its use is execrable. Most of them probably couldn't even identify the origin of that word.

Yis, hou darth peple not stiketh to thi originale Latin formes whanne writinge English! We wolde al duse welle to writen iliche Chaucer.

[Simfan34]

This whole exchange:

But Benghazi!

No, no, no, Ben Ghazi was the Kenyan real estate developer who co-founded the Whether Underground with Rev. Saul Alinsky (the pastor at Obama's church).  And more importantly, Barry Soetoro still won't release his real birth certificate which shows he was born in the country of Africa and attended a madrasa in Indochina.

I blame Acorn and Solyndra.

So the problem with healthcare.gov was that it used twenty-year old British computers?

Exactly, old Europe needs to mind its own business.

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OK, now those who could do so before 8 do scare me.

I'm fairly certain I could have done by then, but then the list was noticeably shorter than it is now.

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Hot flames of furious anger are erupting from my ears right now.

Maybe those flames wouldn't be so hot if they weren't fueled by alcohol from your latest drunken binge.

[Simfan34]

Clearly if a ATLASFORUMCON were held, it should be in either Oklahoma or Thailand, and in either case it needs to someplace where an Ingress portal exists.

[Simfan34]

The real question is how will this affect the Lebanon primary?

Not nearly as much as Voter IED laws affect the primary next door in Afghanistan. (Yes, I know Afghanistan doesn't border Lebanon.  That's part of the joke, tho the pun on Voter ID is intended to be the real blast.)

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Left-handed in a right-handed world.

Yeah, I've always wondered - how do y'all use scissors?

While running.

[Simfan34]

mods, pls ban Simfan

!!!

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WTF, Simi, Ernest hasn't said anything remotely humorous since 2005.

That's because my comedy is up close and personal instead of remote.

[Simfan34]

Hillary Clinton is really well-liked in political circles, actually.  Senators, people from the Clinton administration and her staff generally say she's a really nice, fair, hard-working person.  The only arguably angry, mean thing she did was kill Vince Foster, but that was ages ago.

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If it looks like a duck and acts like a duck and quacks like a duck...

Stones in glass houses dude.

But a bird in the hand is the smoking gun that broke the camel's back, n'est-ce pas?

[Simfan34]

Don't worry, everyone who has posted in this thread will be beheaded in due course, insha'Allah.

[Simfan34]

This Sunday a referendum on annexation of Rostov-on-Don was conducted in Odessa. Long lines of voters were observed in front of the polling booths. According to organizers, 146% of the participants voted in favor of incorporation of Rostov into Odessa.

http://dumskaya.net/news/odessity-proveli-referendum-o-prisoedinenii-rost-035808/

[Simfan34]

February 29, 2004

Fundraiser at Timber Lake Playhouse, Mount Carroll, Illinois (For Barack Obama, Daniel Hynes, Inez Tannenbaum, Tom Daschle, Betty Castor and Peter Deutsch) (Performing Beauty and the Beast; Special Hybrid Edtion)

(Casting for Beauty and the Beast; Babette; Patti LaBelle. Monsiuer D'Arque; Jeremy Irons. The Bimbettes; Britney Spears, Anika Noni Rose and Tia Carrrere.  Wardrobe (Madam Grande La Bouche) Madonna. Lefou; Howie Mandel. Maurice; Sylvester Stallone.  Chip; Scott Irby-Ranniar
Mrs Potts; Angela Lansbury. Cogsworth; Neil Patrick Harris. Lumiere; Michael Gambon. Gaston; Pierce Brosnan. Beast; Brad Pitt. Belle; Celine Dion; Narrator; Tom Vilsack)

[Simfan34]

"Scott Irby-Ranniar"

[Simfan34]

Though I will disagree on what Putin will pursue next after he swallows Donbass; he won't go west immediately. You all may be underestimating the importance of the resource-rich and, in all cases except Uzbekistan and Turkmenistan, fairly pro-Moscow governments which will probably end up as part of Putin's "Union State" thing in Central Asia. If he's to annex Kazakhstan/Kyrgyzstan/Tajikistan he'll have to act before they fall entirely in China's sphere.

There is a complication there. A) Russia only borders on Kazakhstan. B) If the "polite people" show up in Kazakhstan they will be arrested and/or killed within hours. Kazakhstan is a proper dictatorship, if somewhat benevolent. And it has been given warning. Apparently, security services in northern Kazakhstan are super-vigilant already, taking care of shadowing visitors from Russia.

[Simfan34]

The so-called "far right" is, fundamentally, no worse than the peons of neoliberal hegemony that constitute the false political choice citizens are normally faced with. I welcome any attempt to dismantle the abhorrent system of velociraptor capitalism that the workers have been devoured by for far too long. Will the Eurocrats (so-called, of course) wake up? Perhaps.

How is this funny?

[Simfan34]

HAHAHHAHAHA.

i was going To do something but now I don't want to do anything because F**K

Close that f**king thread before I get Dave to ban his ass

You really do need a better sleep cure. Not only are your posts bizzare, but you're up at 4:30 AM!

[Simfan34]

This is good.

I'd love to see a reverse article interviewing a bunch of millionaires in Manhattan and Connecticut and then proclaiming that the GOP is wrecked because it's losing its core constituency and needs to run a Mike Bloomberg to win those people back.

That article would be missing the point on roughly the same scale.

I did my best:

Falls Church (United States) (AFP) - Jim Feltner's days are empty. He is a rich man in one of the richest counties in the United States and has never used unemployment benefits or food stamps in his life.

But the Northern Virginia resident has nothing but scorn for the Republican Party, which wants to relieve people like him of the burden of paying for those who actually do use food stamps and unemployment.

Feltner sits in a hard wooden chair at an Au Bon Pain in Alexandria, his MacBook Air perched in front of him.

People around here, he says, are "thriving, indisputably. I know, because I'm one of them."

Armed with two master's degrees, he lives off a salary he receives working as a healthcare management consultant in Deloitte's public sector consultancy practice.

Feltner voted for George H. W. Bush in 1988 when he was an undergraduate at Tufts University, but now says: "I will vote for anybody against the Republican Party."

"I don't care who the Democrat is, I'll vote for him or her. I don't care if they're a pedophile, a convicted felon, an Indian, a Pakistani, even someone who attended an SEC school!"

"They talk about this Real America and Fake America and make fun of the president for going to Harvard. I mean, I did post-graduate work there,'" Feltner alleged.

"Is that something for a major political party to say?," he added. "They have a problem with the educated people."

The same aversion to the Republicans is heard to the north, in Suffolk County, New York.

Alison Dahlberg-Tate, 38, whose necklace of pea-sized pearls hugs her slender neck, says she does not care about politics. She hasn't thought about it since her senior seminar at Sarah Lawrence. But one thing is clear: she does not like the Republican Party.

"I guess Republicans just worry about money in their pocket, what they and their friends are doing. They're not worried the poor, about the women, about the people who have been victimized in this patriarchal society," Dahlberg-Tate said, stepping onto her sailing yacht.

"The Democrats, they are the ones who get us," Dahlberg-Tate added, as her husband Hugh Marsden "Skip" Tate, IV, climbed aboard the vessel with a picnic basket.

"And what if we make poor women pay for birth control? I mean we might as well be in Somalia," Dahlberg-Tate said. She and her husband receives $3,800 each week from the H. M. Tate, Jr. Family Trust, the bulk of which goes to supporting their dogs Millie and Beckett. Skip's freelance public relations work for a New York City-based tech startup is their only other source of income.

"It's unfortunate, when the checks come out, there's a festival atmosphere in the bank," said Mike Bryant, director of client relations for Northern Trust's wealth management division, which oversees the distribution of trust fund dividends to their heirs.

"If someone dared say, I already paid for four years at Haverford and grad school at Yale and you're not getting anything else out of me, it's going to be a really awkward Memorial Day Weekend at the Cape," he said.

[Simfan34]

Oddly enough, this is now the non-Tea Party candidate for Cantor's seat:



Also, he's writing a vampire novel.

HP; VHP if he has his vampires sparkle.

[Simfan34]

Nice follow-up:

Everybody you talk to would tell you I have the mind of someone in their 50's or 60's.  I talk old.  I act old.

Ah, that explains it.  No wonder you don't want a job.  You're getting ready for retirement!

[Simfan34]

Worse than crashing a funeral to play Egress.