Update XVI: Sidejackin' it in the Train Room.

[Mr. Morden]

Eraserhead, as you seem to own the rights to this show, have you considered selling Update merchandise?

Bushie owns the rights to all the characters created in seasons 1-14.  Eraserhead only owns those created in seasons 15 and 16.  Maybe he can sell merchandise that's specific to those two seasons, like a model train room.

[Mr. Morden]

I forget, did you get as far as buying an engagement ring this time?

[Mr. Morden]

sorry to hear about the breakup Bushie, was it you or her



ps first merch is out

Looks good, but I think the background should be the Oklahoma flag.

[Mr. Morden]

there is a chance that maybe bushie just wasnt that into allison?

He writes "As a matter of fact, I brought it up to her at 13:00 today and she agreed to it."

So yeah, he dumped her, just like last time.

[Mr. Morden]

On topic, it's clear he knew he was about to get dumped, so freaked out and dumped her. On the upside, it's at least it's a legitimate reason... and if she's stupid enough to take you on a THIRD time, she deserves you.

Sounds like it played out very much like the last breakup.  Bushie dumps her because he was afraid he was about to get dumped himself, just like he did over the botched joke.

But just like in that case, it sounds rather fishy.  Do real people actually say "I think I'm going to break up with you by the end of next week"?  Is Allison Bushie-esque in putting a timeframe on such things?

[Mr. Morden]

I told her I needed to focus on establishing myself in this job and she said she needed to focus on her health.

She broke up with you because you were getting fatter and she was getting slimmer?

I promise you there was nothing "slim" about that woman, aside from her chances of keeping both feet past age 40.

....this is hands down the best thing I've heard in forever...make love to me?

Heard?  So I'm not the only one who listens to the audiobook version of Update (narrated by Benedict Cumberpatch)?

[Mr. Morden]

I'm only doing this after consulting with my parents and letting her take stock of her financial situation.

Who's "her" in that sentence?  Whose financial situation has to do with your quitting?  Your parents?

[Mr. Morden]

Last week Allison and the job are the two most important things in the universe and out of [Inks]ing no where you supposedly just up and ditch both?

Not only that, but anyone who suggested that the job wasn't a good fit for him was being "negative", and he didn't want to hear any negativity about it.  That's the typical Bushie pattern.  Whatever he's decided on today is absolutely right, and no one is allowed to question the wisdom of his decision.  Then tomorrow, he changes his mind, does something completely different, and whatever the new decision is is absolutely right, and anyone who questions the wisdom of that is being mean.

The whole thing is rather Orwellian.

[Mr. Morden]

Bushie's words from nine days ago:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=191988.msg4237186#msg4237186

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And then the next day:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=191988.msg4238112#msg4238112

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[Mr. Morden]

Now that he's broken up with Allison, I guess the plans to move to Kenya are back on?

[Mr. Morden]

Believe me, there are millions of us out there that don't even care if you live off the government.  We are called Democrats and you happen to be one! 

Sort of.  Oddly, he's already endorsed Christie for president:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=182005.0

[Mr. Morden]

Your GF was the best thing ever to happen to you and you were never going to leave her side. Now, she's history and you're trying your best to pretend she never mattered to you.

Your job as the greatest blessing to happen to you in a long time and now you're committed to walking away.

I'd say the stress of going overboard with overly-zealous devotion is not worth it. I hope you learn to not put yourself through it anymore.

I don't think he really did have overzealous devotion in either case.  He liked the idea of having a job, and liked the idea of having a girlfriend and getting married.  He tried to convince himself that he was excited about both, and even accused others of being too negative whenever expressing any doubts.

But he may have simply been trying to talk himself into loving both, when he really didn't.

[Mr. Morden]

I have made my decision after sleeping on it and I'm going to make the unpopular decision of pulling the plug and then get started on the job search as soon as I get back home.

As long as you can squeeze in an application or two between baseball games, I'm sure it'll be alright.

How about I look for jobs during baseball games?  I can do that, too.

I'm impressed.

If Bushie were to actually play baseball, that would impress me.

[Mr. Morden]

Bushie, is the option of moving to Kenya dead?  IIRC, you gave up on that to be with Allison, but if she's now out of the picture, will the Kenya plan return?

[Mr. Morden]

I don't get it. Why did you quit your job at a call center to make more time to apply for a job at a call center?

Laziness. The inability to do (more than) one thing.

Right.  But the question is, if you're going to apply for (and accept) jobs that are nearly the same as the one you just left, then what's the point of doing the job search at all?  Why not just stay where you are?

[Mr. Morden]

I'm almost starting to think the people for banning Bushie have a point.

It's pretty obvious the only way Update will go away is banning Bushie, and Bushie is using Update as an outlet. This means he isn't actually facing up to his very severe issues. If he didn't have it he might have to actual deal with his issues instead of soaking in the attention.

...But it's going to have to happen sooner or later anyway.

Why would ending Update cause him to face up to his severe issues?  Update disappeared for several months in 2011, and nothing changed.  I don't see why people think *anything* is going to get Bushie to change.  He is who he is, and I don't see him getting better any time soon, whether he "hits rock bottom" or not.

[Mr. Morden]

What is your goal, Bushie?  What is a job that will be good enough that you won't immediately start looking for another job?  Is the goal to get a CADD job, and any other job you take will be an interim step towards getting that CADD job?

[Mr. Morden]

A thought that occurred to me is that a pizza or Jimmy John's delivery job might be decent for Bushie. You can work part time with very flexible hours so he can't use the excuse of having to look for other jobs, it's mostly driving, and even he can walk up carrying that to someone's doorstep. And while the pay isn't great they can make good money with tips, my brother working at Jimmy John's delivery is probably making more than Bushie did at his last call center job with his tips included. And I don't know if Tulsa is the same but in Minneapolis many have the only qualification that you have a car and a driver's license.

As long as there's never an inch of snow, he'd be OK.

[Mr. Morden]

What is your goal, Bushie?  What is a job that will be good enough that you won't immediately start looking for another job?  Is the goal to get a CADD job, and any other job you take will be an interim step towards getting that CADD job?

I would ideally like to have a CAD job.  Yet, everybody requires x years of experience.  How does one gain the experience if nobody wants to give you the experience?  I'll take any office job, but I'd really like a CAD job.

OK, but that doesn't answer my question.  If you take an office job, are you going to keep looking for a CAD job in your free time (and potentially quit that office job like you just did the call center, in order to spend more time looking)?

[Mr. Morden]

Do pizza delivery guys spend 100% of their job delivering pizzas?  If it's a slow day with deliveries, then are they ever asked to actually participate in the making of the pizzas?  Because we are talking about someone who needs assistance for spaghetti.

[Mr. Morden]

Bushie, did you talk to the people at the South Bryant Campus about the CADD certificate yet?

I just want to know if it's a CAD certificate or a CADD certificate.

[Mr. Morden]

Maybe the breakup was mutual this time. Allison hasn't bashed Bushie at all on social media (unlike last time).

Or she dumped him.  Or Bushie's telling the truth about her "I'm probably going to dump you by the end of next week" statement.

[Mr. Morden]

What's the longest relationship Bushie's ever had?  8 months?

[Mr. Morden]

Thursday and Friday last week really changed my mind.  It's hard to say what the last straw was as it was all a cumulative effect.  I guess if I were forced to name a last straw, it was that the managers knew absolutely nothing and came to work actually high on weed and were not stopped as they walked in.  Mind you, weed is still illegal in Oklahoma and it should not be consumed before work.  I wasn't really surprised that they were high on weed as the place had absolutely no drug testing policy.  It accepted not only drug addicts, but it also accepted convicted felons.  Many of the managers and even my classmates have been incarcerated before.  I'm all for reintegration, but it still made me feel uncomfortable.

So it wasn't really about the fact that the job didn't leave you time to search for another job?  It was really about the fact that you felt uncomfortable there because there were too many street toughs?

[Mr. Morden]

Thursday and Friday last week really changed my mind.  It's hard to say what the last straw was as it was all a cumulative effect.  I guess if I were forced to name a last straw, it was that the managers knew absolutely nothing and came to work actually high on weed and were not stopped as they walked in.  Mind you, weed is still illegal in Oklahoma and it should not be consumed before work.  I wasn't really surprised that they were high on weed as the place had absolutely no drug testing policy.  It accepted not only drug addicts, but it also accepted convicted felons.  Many of the managers and even my classmates have been incarcerated before.  I'm all for reintegration, but it still made me feel uncomfortable.

So it wasn't really about the fact that the job didn't leave you time to search for another job?  It was really about the fact that you felt uncomfortable there because there were too many street toughs?

I'm thinking Papa and Mama Bushie we're ready to make him pull the plug as soon as he told them how many blacks we're working there.

Bushie wasn't black enough for this job?  Why didn't he just show them pictures of his Kenyan children to burnish his "American-African" cred?