Update XVI: Sidejackin' it in the Train Room.

[Flake]

I don't understand the title.

[Flake]

I'm so sorry to hear that, I just hope you can get through this.

Moving on to a completely different subject: I think it would be beneficial to you if you walked that 1/4 mile with clothes to the laundromat, it would be positive for your health, although not enough exercise as you need to do in order to lose weight.

[Flake]

I told her I needed to focus on establishing myself in this job and she said she needed to focus on her health.

She broke up with you because you were getting fatter and she was getting slimmer?

I promise you there was nothing "slim" about that woman, aside from her chances of keeping both feet past age 40.

....this is hands down the best thing I've heard in forever...make love to me?

Heard?  So I'm not the only one who listens to the audiobook version of Update (narrated by Benedict Cumberpatch)?

I'm actually listening to the Betty White version.

[Flake]

Bushie, please don't quit the job. You know you need the money. Look for a full time job while you're working there, but you cannot quit. You know that and we all know that. Please take our advice this time. Please.

[Flake]

What on earth is a "3 days notice"? You're supposed give at least two week's notice.

Expect to be escorted out of the building again, Jeff.

Escorted out of the building again?

[Flake]

I'm very happy you got a job that you love! Congratulations!

[Flake]

Who is Christine?

[Flake]

Who is Christine?

Any other information? Preferably in text form

[Flake]

Uh, Bushie, do you ever briefly relax while watching this Big Brother thing? Are there some attractive ladies on it?

I never briefly relax during the show and it doesn't spur it on, either.  I just watch for the entertainment value.  In fact, I haven't briefly relaxed in quite a while.  I'm trying to avoid that as I know it's not healthy to my Christian life.

...what?

Edited to add:

[Flake]

Christmas seems a little bit early. Why not wait until tomorrow?

[Flake]

I was going to go out for a Labor Day brunch tomorrow, but I'm so eager to get my new lifestyle started that I may just have cereal for breakfast, a couple ham sandwiches for lunch, and a sensible dinner.  I really would like to eat in all day tomorrow, especially since I ate out tonight.  I may go get something from the store to fix tomorrow evening.  So, tomorrow's schedule now looks like this:  Bed time at 02:00 am.  Breakfast at 9:30.  Walk at 10:30.  Big Brother at 11:00.  Baseball at 12:00 and 15:00.  Football at 19:00.  Bed time at 22:45.

How about one ham sandwich?

[Flake]

I prefer if you got a Coke Zero instead of a regular Coke. Really disappointed in that, Bushie, but no fries is no fries. Thank you.

Don't knock him on the double whopper guys. Bigger burger is a better path to his goals than more empty carbs of french fries. That's the real point. Trying to get Bushie to stop eating empty carbs. And please for the love of god salad.

Regular soda is empty carbs, though.

If it's any consolation, I only drank about 2/3 of one large cup.  I did not go back for a refill and I poured out the last third of it.  So, I only consumed about 170 calories with that drink.  That's a little more than a can of coke which is 140 calories.

I'm pretty sure a large is more than 15ish ounces.

But at least you're making good changes

[Flake]

That's not good at all

[Flake]

Don't say it's old news because you need to stay on your a game to make sure you keep this job.

[Flake]

Why can't you stop eating like that? You've been having a headache for a week because you couldn't not eat ice cream? You need to stop this.

[Flake]

Why can't you stop eating like that? You've been having a headache for a week because you couldn't not eat ice cream? You need to stop this.

It wasn't the ice cream.  It was the chocolate.  The ice cream was cookies and cream.

Then don't eat the chocolate! Your body cannot handle it.