Just as with the American spelling of the word color, as opposed to the British colour, this has its roots in the American Revolution. You see once the US of fu
.ckin' A became an independent country, they were desperate to cut their ties to that old rainy bleak island who'd not so long ago ruled over them. Therefor they decided to get rid of all pesky British things they could find on their continent.
Now what is more British than horrendous teeth? Tea in all honour (or should I say honor) but that's just an Indian import. A crocked brown smile, now there's where real England's at. So as a counter reaction to this all true patriotic Americans became determined to have the straightest, whitest teeth in all of the world.
The great inspiration for this was of course George Washington himself, with his beautiful teeth made of ivory and gold. Of course those British bastards, jealous as always, spread the false myth that the first president had wooden teeth,
BUT LET IT BE CLEAR, George Washington had wonderful teeth and he sat the example that all young men and women should follow.
GOD SAVE AMERICA!
