Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update)

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Science bless you, Eraser.

How was worship today, Bushie?  Corporate or limited liability?

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I speak as someone who cannot nap... but surely four hours is not a nap?

Plus, how the hell were you so tired from doing nothing that you could sleep for four hours on a Sunday?

It's Bushie's body fighting off him eating more garbage.

Actually, last night for supper, I had a roast beef dinner with a baked potato, corn, ranch style beans, and a lettuce and cheese salad with no dressing and unsweetened iced tea.  I didn't have anything this morning and just had left over roast for lunch.  I don't know why I was so tired this afternoon, the only thing I did this morning was go to church for 3 hours, definitely not enough to get me all worn out.  Then again, for some reason I'm normally more tired on Sunday than the other six days.  Who knows.  I had a McDonald's cheeseburger this evening for dinner, but again no fries.

I've no words...

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Actually, last night for supper, I had a roast beef dinner with a baked potato, corn, ranch style beans, and a lettuce and cheese salad

A burger and fries is beef, cheese, lettuce, wheat, potatoes. Corn is a grain equiv to wheat.

So basically you had a burger and fries with beans on it. Congrats on eating less healthier than usually. I can't imagine how many servings you had, too.

Why are you attacking me for potatoes when you yourself recommended a steak with MASHED POTATOES from Texas Roadhouse over Labor Day weekend?  Plus, you said a complete meal is better than a burger and fries and now you're attacking me over a complete meal.  You have no credibility left with me.  I am no longer listening to anything you have to say.

Bushie might have you here, King. 

Still, Jeffrey, no way are you getting out of my doghouse until I get a selfie with MANGO IN MOUTH!  You hear me, brah?  GET SOME!

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Actually, last night for supper, I had a roast beef dinner with a baked potato, corn, ranch style beans, and a lettuce and cheese salad

A burger and fries is beef, cheese, lettuce, wheat, potatoes. Corn is a grain equiv to wheat.

So basically you had a burger and fries with beans on it. Congrats on eating less healthier than usually. I can't imagine how many servings you had, too.

Why are you attacking me for potatoes when you yourself recommended a steak with MASHED POTATOES from Texas Roadhouse over Labor Day weekend?  Plus, you said a complete meal is better than a burger and fries and now you're attacking me over a complete meal.  You have no credibility left with me.  I am no longer listening to anything you have to say.

I recommended steak, with some potatoes and VEGETABLES. Broccoli, spinach, carrots, green beans. You ordered potatoes and mac and cheese. You never listened to anything I had to say.

You did not eat a complete meal at your grandmothers. You had no greens, no oranges, no purples, no nothing. You had carbs, fat, carbs, fat, and carbs. Same as it ever was.

You will never lose weight because you ignore vegetables. Your complete meal was more carbs and more calories than most McDonalds combos.

I think he's miffed at you because he did have lettuce. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Actually, last night for supper, I had a roast beef dinner with a baked potato, corn, ranch style beans, and a lettuce and cheese salad

A burger and fries is beef, cheese, lettuce, wheat, potatoes. Corn is a grain equiv to wheat.

So basically you had a burger and fries with beans on it. Congrats on eating less healthier than usually. I can't imagine how many servings you had, too.

Why are you attacking me for potatoes when you yourself recommended a steak with MASHED POTATOES from Texas Roadhouse over Labor Day weekend?  Plus, you said a complete meal is better than a burger and fries and now you're attacking me over a complete meal.  You have no credibility left with me.  I am no longer listening to anything you have to say.

I recommended steak, with some potatoes and VEGETABLES. Broccoli, spinach, carrots, green beans. You ordered potatoes and mac and cheese. You never listened to anything I had to say.

You did not eat a complete meal at your grandmothers. You had no greens, no oranges, no purples, no nothing. You had carbs, fat, carbs, fat, and carbs. Same as it ever was.

You will never lose weight because you ignore vegetables. Your complete meal was more carbs and more calories than most McDonalds combos.

I think he's miffed at you because he did have lettuce.  

He has lettuce on his burgers. Lettuce is not going to help him unless it's a rough lettuce like spinach or kale. He needs actual vegetables.

It's all part of his selective editing of advice he receives. I tell him steak, potatoes, and broccoli is a complete meal and he translates that as steak, potatoes, gravy, beans, corn, cheese as a complete meal. It's not.

You know he's not going to make that distinction.  If he eats a plant he declares victory and has a Double Quarter Pounder to celebrate. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Actually, last night for supper, I had a roast beef dinner with a baked potato, corn, ranch style beans, and a lettuce and cheese salad

A burger and fries is beef, cheese, lettuce, wheat, potatoes. Corn is a grain equiv to wheat.

So basically you had a burger and fries with beans on it. Congrats on eating less healthier than usually. I can't imagine how many servings you had, too.

Why are you attacking me for potatoes when you yourself recommended a steak with MASHED POTATOES from Texas Roadhouse over Labor Day weekend?  Plus, you said a complete meal is better than a burger and fries and now you're attacking me over a complete meal.  You have no credibility left with me.  I am no longer listening to anything you have to say.

I recommended steak, with some potatoes and VEGETABLES. Broccoli, spinach, carrots, green beans. You ordered potatoes and mac and cheese. You never listened to anything I had to say.

You did not eat a complete meal at your grandmothers. You had no greens, no oranges, no purples, no nothing. You had carbs, fat, carbs, fat, and carbs. Same as it ever was.

You will never lose weight because you ignore vegetables. Your complete meal was more carbs and more calories than most McDonalds combos.

I think he's miffed at you because he did have lettuce.  

He has lettuce on his burgers. Lettuce is not going to help him unless it's a rough lettuce like spinach or kale. He needs actual vegetables.

It's all part of his selective editing of advice he receives. I tell him steak, potatoes, and broccoli is a complete meal and he translates that as steak, potatoes, gravy, beans, corn, cheese as a complete meal.

Steak, beans, and broccoli is complete meal. Steak, corn, and snap peas is a complete meal. Steak, cheese, and asparagus is complete meal.

No veggies, no exercise, no weight loss. That's a fact.

You've lost all credibility, so you might as well save your breath and go back to the bleachers.

No rest until #SassyBushie is trending

EDIT: And God Bless You, Eraserhead.  If this season was Bushie-produced we would be heading for a mid-season locking by Page 3.

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Maybe Bushie should learn to grill

I believe he's moved on from spaghetti assistance.  Perhaps hope springs anew.

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Why is it considered a "challenge" to avoid ice cream and fries for a month?  Seriously, nothing could be easier, right?

It might be tough for a true Braum's connoisseur like Our Dear Friend. 

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Lunch time.  The day is going very well and very quick.  I've moved onto another project that I'm almost finished with as we speak.  I've got church tonight from 1830-2000.  Tomorrow after work, I am going back to my parents for the night so I can be closer to the doctors office Friday morning for my blood work appointment.  I'll come back to work after the appointment.  The appointment is at 8:20 and I live 2 hours from the doctor whereas my parents live 25 minutes.  I'll do the same thing next Thursday and Friday for my regular doctors appointment.  I'll come back to work next Friday as well.

Where do you usually go for lunch?

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HD, I always stay in the office for lunch and have either a block of Ramen or a Mac and cheese cup.  It's not a gourmet lunch and I am usually starving by the time I get off of an evening, but they're low on calories and don't cost me anything more than what I pay at the store.  I need to find some variety, but I don't know good and fast alternatives.  I only have 30 minutes for lunch.

Bushie, Ramen is HORRIBLE for you.  If you want something quick with nutritional value you should grab those 5 for $5 Starfish tuna packets and throw some relish in. 

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It's one thing not to cook. He can't assemble meals. I know people who don't cook but still have the sense to buy frozen Stouffers entree, a bag of frozen peas, and Uncle Ben's instant rice and you know... have a full dinner on a plate.

Bushie, from what he's told us, eats stew out of a can cold because the can isn't microwaveable.

He eats stew out of a can without heating it?? I know when he ate "vegetables" in Utah, he ate them straight from a can and complained about how it tasted. I had no idea he didn't even use a microwave if it didn't come in a microwavable container.

Bushie, is this true?  Of course taking cool veggies straight from a can is nasty!  You need to learn to cook, dude.  Spices and preparation are your friend. 

Did you never experiment in the kitchen with things as a child?  There were so many times where I had to make dinner myself as a kid and I've a much better diet for it today.

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I just made greek style canned green beans with some tomatoes and onions for dinner. They were great! If only Bushie knew the boys of cooking and being a real man.

My mom taught me her recipe for vinegar and garlic green beans years ago.  They are wonderful, flavorful, and go with everything. 

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Bushie, would you be willing to TRY whole wheat pasta?  It's one of those tastes better and is better for you instances.

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Seeing as so many of you are personally invested in the Update, why not organize an Atlas road trip to Oklahoma in order to cook for Bushie for a week.

I was totally down for the Jeffison wedding tailgate, but that never came to pass.  Plus, I would totally feel wrong if I was in OK and I didn't hit up Braum's with Bushie.

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Pop tarts...

Jesus dick, dude.  EAT SOMETHING HEALTHY!!!  Anything!  Nibble on a granola bar, have a few blueberries... Hell, lick an apple at this point!

And must I keep bringing up mango!?  I'm literally guaranteeing you'll like it.

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A vague, but depressing and sad Facebook status from Our Dear Friend today.

RIP Sweet J.J.  : (

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The barrier Jeff needs to break through is using food as a reward system. He's had a hard day as he views it, and thinks he "deserves" a Big Mac as a reward for all of that sweat and toil (as he sees it - what you all see is irrelevant). He needs to switch out food for sex basically as a reward system. It very simple really. That's the basic trap fats find themselves in.

Jesus will have none of it, as with any benign pleasure.  Perhaps he can try an addiction less harmful than his diet, like heroin. 

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Spot on, Eraserhead.  All the juju I can muster is OKC-bound.

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I'm not concerned about Mondale, I just don't want it to even have the chance of getting back to Facebook.  I'm being very vague on Facebook, as well.  This is at the wishes of this family member.

J.J.
Grandma Bushie

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Somebody's coming out of the closet, perhaps?

^ this is probably the most likely explanation.  I couldn't imagine being a gay in Oklahoma, and the family would certainly be hush hush about the whole thing. 

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Somebody's coming out of the closet, perhaps?

^ this is probably the most likely explanation.  I couldn't imagine being a gay in Oklahoma, and the family would certainly be hush hush about the whole thing. 

I don't think "the situation is dire" is applicable to that, and I don't think Bishie would be accepting of that, and it seems that he's accepted whatever it is that happened.

A gay in the family in OKLAHOMA!?!  A dire situation indeed.  If I were Bushie's gay relative I'd be fearing for my life.

Bushie is for gay marriage, Inks.  I think he'd be perfectly accepting of a gay.  When it comes to social politics, Bushie is the Rosie O'Donnell of Oklahoma (which isn't saying much, but still).

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Yeah, this is something socially bad... not something actually bad.

Yup.  Bushie is (quite obviously) a major attention whore.  If he could get sympathy for a sick or dying relative he'd be all over it.  This is something that is a source of embarrassment for the Bushie clan.

I for one am very proud of Bushie's brave gay cousin!

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who wouldnt miss work if their gay second cousin came out?

Most of us wouldn't.  Well, in Oklahoma there is a lot of work involved.  You have to establish "safe zones", alternative routes to work, schedule "pray away" sessions with the family minister, etc.

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How's the 12 hours of NFL football going today Bushie.  Admittedly, I'll be tuned in for a solid 7, as Seattle/Denver is a real can't miss contest.

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Is it just me or did Bushie delete the post on Facebook? This is all getting very mysterious.

Yeah, I think he mentioned that the mystery family member told him to delete it.

What a strange story. At first I thought and worried it was a death in the family or a very bad medical diagnosis, but I don't know why he'd be so secretive about something like that. Hopefully it is just something silly like his cousin coming out.

Let's not be so cavalier about something as grave as a gay trying to live openly in Oklahoma.