California Adopts 'Yes Means Yes' Sexual Assault Rule

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Sweet. Jesus. This is the worst thread I have ever seen on Atlas. Yes, I'm fairly convinced it's the absolute worst. And that's saying a lot.

Just burn it to the ground. And let the rape apologists die in the ensuing fire.

^^^^^

I'm very tolerant when it's coming to people voicing diffrent opinions, even really stupid ones. However, it's not just dumb posts we're talking about here, nor controversial opinions everybody is entitled to. He's been literally defending violent criminals and insulting their victims. Worse: he just keeps doing this.

Ban time.

[Person Man]

Like Angus, I can testify that someone inviting someone up for a drink does not always lead to sex and does not have to mean that.

I was thinking about this last night.  One time, long before I was married (I was probably about 30, living in Boston) a couple of friends and I went to a bar--a drinking bar, not a dance club--where one of the guys recognized some women he knew.  One of them is from Italy, a couple of years younger than I, and very attractive.  We went over to them and started chatting them up.  Very soon I was getting on well with the Italian chick.  Soon enough it became clear that we were going home together.  We indicated to our friends that we'd be leaving, and we went on our way.  She said we could go to her place, and the mood was good.  We were swapping spit and rubbing noses all the way back to her place.  She had two roomies, but we only spent about a microsecond getting acquainted with them, after which she led me into her room, closed the door and plopped on the bed.  I had no doubt she wanted me to do her.  She kept putting my hand up there on her beautiful woman breasts during the obligatory tongue-wrestling contest, and giving me the eyes-wide-open "C'mon already.  Is this happening or what?" stare. 

But I wouldn't.  Or I didn't. 

All the way back to her place, on the subway, I started thinking more and more about how I'd hang out for a while but politely refuse.  She was very attractive--pretty face, nice build, smart, and lively--and under most circumstances I'd have been a sporting fellow, but as it turns out I had a huge hemmorhoid on my ass.  It had grown to about the size of my pinkie finger.  I've only had 5 of those in my life, and this was the biggest and most painful one I'd ever had, and because of it I had very little desire to let my pants down.  It would have been awkward and painful at best, and at worst totally freaked her out if the stress caused a bleeding rupture.  No doubt I was thinking that a week or so later, after my embarrassing condition had subsided, I'd instigate a rendezvous with the intention of getting more intimately acquainted with her. 

Eventually, after about an hour in her room, enjoying her company, and unceremoniously changing the subject during her more aggressive advances, I told her that I need to leave, indicating that I'd call her (we had previously exchanged telephone numbers.)  As you might imagine, she never returned my calls.  I don't think I'd have returned them either.  In fact, when I've been in similar situations--having brought a woman to my bed and been rejected at the last minute--I generally don't call back either.  Who needs that frustration?  Who needs the hurt feelings?  Ah, a bigger man would have been honest about the situation.  People develop minor, non-communicable illnesses all the time, after all.  Perhaps she'd have been understanding about it and suggested we wait a week, or that I simply lie back, close my eyes, relax, and receive a thorough undercarriage waxing sure to ease my pain.  Well, I'll never know.  After that episode I become more understanding upon being rejected at the last minute, even so far as to start call the woman a couple of days later to schedule.  In many cases, those follow-up appointments worked out very well. 

Anyway, the point is that I can relate to the person who comes home with someone, even knowing that the person is horny and ready, but with no intention of going all the way.  Probably we all can.  Something similar has happened to you, maybe.  I say this for Mortimer's benefit:  It isn't coy to follow someone home even if you're not determined to have sex with that person.  There are a million reasons why one might not go all the way, and one must realize that it's not necessarily a slight or a tease or a game. 

Yeah. That's how I feel. I once settled for sex but not full intercourse because I wanted to try to get to know someone better after taking them to their car after a night at a party at community event on Tampa's only 42nd floor. I went to a date at the local Greek restaurant two nights later and she was just too conservative.  The point is that even when Obama was up big the afternoon of  Election Day in 2008 didn't make him President-elect yet. In fact, I saw how badly he was doing in some of the first precincts and had some doubt.

[○∙◄☻¥tπ[╪AV┼cVê└]

Mortimer,
It doesn't always work like that.  Sometimes you invite someone up for a drink and you both drink so much that neither of you are into it.  Sometimes you invite someone up for a drink and you drink too much and even though she's horny, you're only able to produce something resembling an elevator button, even with a good attitude.  Sometimes you invite someone up for a drink and maybe you're horny but she's really not into it.  (maybe she's not into you in that way; maybe she's just not into it at the moment; either way she makes it clear that she's not into it.)  These are all things that normally happen.  They have all happened to me. at one time or another.  I assume that one day they will all happen to most of the posters here once they grow up.

I've been hit on by straight women and by gay men.  Also, I have hit on women, sometimes successfully, sometimes not so much.  I have been invited up for a drink and I have invited others up for a drink.  Usually one of us was trying to get the other one into the sack--on that point I'll agree--but as a person who has said "no" (and I'm more into the No means No mentality than the Yes means Yes groupthink), I can attest that accepting an offer for a drink isn't tantamount to accepting an offer of being invaginated or to stand it up on command.

You are buying into too many assumptions, and your arguments are not helping to point out the inherent inefficiency and potential pitfalls of this unnecessary bill.

You're right. This bill is flawed, but Mortimer's comments are certainly not helping that.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

[Chancellor Tanterterg]

I feel like most opponents of this bill are just afraid they won't get what they want if they have to ask.

[Deus Naturae]

I feel like most opponents of this bill are just afraid they won't get what they want if they have to ask.

So you think that Angus and Jfern are probably rapists? That's...pretty harsh.

[Chancellor Tanterterg]

I feel like most opponents of this bill are just afraid they won't get what they want if they have to ask.

So you think that Angus and Jfern are probably rapists? That's...pretty harsh.

I said "most opponents" not "all" although perhaps "many" would've been better wording.  Please don't put words in my mouth, k thx

Also I never said rapists, but I do think a lot of the bill's opponents are worried a "yes mean yes" standard will make it harder for them to get the answer they want than a "no means no" standard.  Doesn't mean Angus or jfern automatically fall into that category.

[Badger]

Haha, a girl coming up for a drink after a date is definitely implied consent.

If you legitimately disagree, you don't live in the real world.

I suspect you know I'm right though and that's why you're overcompensating with caps.

That said, I personally would need more than that to move forward but I could forgive someone for accepting that alone (again, assuming the girl isn't wasted and doesn't say "no") At the very least I wouldn't want to label them a rapist, one of the worst things you could possibly be, based on their perfectly reasonable assumption.

Remember this the next time you go out for drinks with the friendly new person at work and they invite you up to their apartment for a beer.

And then he forces sex on you because you were clearly "sending all the right signals".

Get therapy you psycho.

[Person Man]

This thread reminds me of this from Family Guy:

http://youtu.be/lt8UnS2ns6s