Update XVIII: 15 Miles From Lunch

[Joe Biden 2020]

I want to know what makes a chain establishment "proven."

Well, the "chefs" at chain restaurants cut-and-paste meals together, basically, so you know what you are going to get most of the time.  I just feel like its a case of Papa Bushie liking a certain thing at the Cracker Barrel (for example) so he feels no need to switch it up.  I would hardly call the Clan Bushie creative when it comes to food. 

You are correct, sir.

[King]

Bushie, you and your parents should check out www.yelp.com

So that way you know what a good restaurant is.

[Joe Biden 2020]

I want to know what makes a chain establishment "proven."

Well, the "chefs" at chain restaurants cut-and-paste meals together, basically, so you know what you are going to get most of the time.  I just feel like its a case of Papa Bushie liking a certain thing at the Cracker Barrel (for example) so he feels no need to switch it up.  I would hardly call the Clan Bushie creative when it comes to food, but this behavior seems common across the plains. 

I want to know, though... if you are an Oklahomie and you ask a girl out on a date do you take her to Chili's or something?  I would never, ever, ever even think of taking a girl to a chain restaurant until we've dated for weeks and we were in a rush and oh wow whaddya know there's a Don Pablo's sure why not.

If you think back to the early seasons of Update, I took Susan to IHOP of all places.

[Mr. Morden]

I want to know what makes a chain establishment "proven."

Well, the "chefs" at chain restaurants cut-and-paste meals together, basically, so you know what you are going to get most of the time.  I just feel like its a case of Papa Bushie liking a certain thing at the Cracker Barrel (for example) so he feels no need to switch it up.  I would hardly call the Clan Bushie creative when it comes to food, but this behavior seems common across the plains. 

I want to know, though... if you are an Oklahomie and you ask a girl out on a date do you take her to Chili's or something?  I would never, ever, ever even think of taking a girl to a chain restaurant until we've dated for weeks and we were in a rush and oh wow whaddya know there's a Don Pablo's sure why not.

If you think back to the early seasons of Update, I took Susan to IHOP of all places.

Yeah, and IIRC, that was only your 3rd or 4th date or so.

[Joe Biden 2020]

I want to know what makes a chain establishment "proven."

Well, the "chefs" at chain restaurants cut-and-paste meals together, basically, so you know what you are going to get most of the time.  I just feel like its a case of Papa Bushie liking a certain thing at the Cracker Barrel (for example) so he feels no need to switch it up.  I would hardly call the Clan Bushie creative when it comes to food, but this behavior seems common across the plains. 

I want to know, though... if you are an Oklahomie and you ask a girl out on a date do you take her to Chili's or something?  I would never, ever, ever even think of taking a girl to a chain restaurant until we've dated for weeks and we were in a rush and oh wow whaddya know there's a Don Pablo's sure why not.

If you think back to the early seasons of Update, I took Susan to IHOP of all places.

Yeah, and IIRC, that was only your 3rd or 4th date or so.

I don't remember which one, but it was very early on.

[Joe Biden 2020]

I tell you what, guys, I know we've had a lot of discussion about the length of this job, but at the end of the day, I am very excited and grateful to have another opportunity at such a company as this.  The length talk is all speculation at this point. All that matters right now is getting off to a good start.  I can't worry about how long this will last right now.  The only thing I can worry about right now is Monday, November 3, 2014.  I can't even worry about November 4 at this point.  One day at a time.

[Mr. Morden]

The length talk is all speculation at this point. All that matters right now is getting off to a good start.  I can't worry about how long this will last right now.

There's a good "that's what she said" joke somewhere in there.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I want to know what makes a chain establishment "proven."

Well, the "chefs" at chain restaurants cut-and-paste meals together, basically, so you know what you are going to get most of the time.  I just feel like its a case of Papa Bushie liking a certain thing at the Cracker Barrel (for example) so he feels no need to switch it up.  I would hardly call the Clan Bushie creative when it comes to food, but this behavior seems common across the plains. 

I want to know, though... if you are an Oklahomie and you ask a girl out on a date do you take her to Chili's or something?  I would never, ever, ever even think of taking a girl to a chain restaurant until we've dated for weeks and we were in a rush and oh wow whaddya know there's a Don Pablo's sure why not.

If you think back to the early seasons of Update, I took Susan to IHOP of all places.

That's just so egregious.  IHOP?!  I mean, if you were literally getting out of church and stopping there, fine, but I doubt this is the case. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I tell you what, guys, I know we've had a lot of discussion about the length of this job, but at the end of the day, I am very excited and grateful to have another opportunity at such a company as this.  The length talk is all speculation at this point. All that matters right now is getting off to a good start.  I can't worry about how long this will last right now.  The only thing I can worry about right now is Monday, November 3, 2014.  I can't even worry about November 4 at this point.  One day at a time.

Well done and all, but I'm really enjoying this conversation about Oklahoman eating/mating habits. 

What in the world made you choose IHOP?  A very simple Yelp search reveals many nice little romantic Mexican and Italian spots, but instead it's IHOP with it's gaggle of senile senior citizens and little [Inks]ers screaming and yelling about crayons and pancakes.  What did you get to eat? 

[Mr. Morden]

What in the world made you choose IHOP?  A very simple Yelp search reveals many nice little romantic Mexican and Italian spots, but instead it's IHOP with it's gaggle of senile senior citizens and little [Inks]ers screaming and yelling about crayons and pancakes.  What did you get to eat? 

You're very late to the party on this.  This was already discussed thoroughly nearly five years ago now.  Start reading from here:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=109091.msg2332294#msg2332294

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

What in the world made you choose IHOP?  A very simple Yelp search reveals many nice little romantic Mexican and Italian spots, but instead it's IHOP with it's gaggle of senile senior citizens and little [Inks]ers screaming and yelling about crayons and pancakes.  What did you get to eat? 

You're very late to the party on this.  This was already discussed thoroughly nearly five years ago now.  Start reading from here:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=109091.msg2332294#msg2332294

Never read Update back in the day.  Suppose I shouldn't be bringing up the bad memories for Our Dear Friend.  I'll delve into the archives.  Good day Bushie... continue with CAD(D) Round Two. 

[Mr. Morden]

Actually, that reminds me….while there were some scattered precursor "Update" threads in 2009, "Update" as we know it began on Jan. 17, 2010:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=109091.0

It was really at that point that it became an essentially continuous chronicle of Bushie's life in something like its current state.  So the five year anniversary is coming up in two and a half months.  Any special anniversary episode plans?

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Actually, that reminds me….while there were some scattered precursor "Update" threads in 2009, "Update" as we know it began on Jan. 17, 2010:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=109091.0

It was really at that point that it became an essentially continuous chronicle of Bushie's life in something like its current state.  So the five year anniversary is coming up in two and a half months.  Any special anniversary episode plans?

I think I'm going to share a series of opebo quotes where had Bushie just listened to him things would be vastly different and in many cases, sunnier.  I wasn't always into Update, but having gone back and read past seasons, when opebo wasn't admiring Bushie for leaching off his family, he was doling out some really sound, realistic advice.

[memphis]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

[Joe Biden 2020]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

We tip based on the service we receive, but usually try to give at least 10-15% unless they are absolutely horrible.

[Sopranos Republican]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

Papa Bushie can't tip in excess, hockey. How on earth would he be able to invest in his train room if all his non-Bushie/mama money was going to the pizza guy, and the chili's waitress?

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

We tip based on the service we receive, but usually try to give at least 10-15% unless they are absolutely horrible.

Like I said...

You do understand that servers, for whatever reason, are allowed to be paid far below minimum wage, must deal with many tables and people at a time, are worked ghastly hours, and still have to live off the relative generosity of others, right?  What the hell would qualify as "absolutely horrible" if they get the food to you?  The food is gonna be ready when it's ready, and that has nothing to do with the servers.  I don't ever give less than 25% unless the server literally slapped me across the face.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

Papa Bushie can't tip in excess, hockey. How on earth would he be able to invest in his train room if all his non-Bushie/mama money was going to the pizza guy, and the chili's waitress?

If you can't afford to tip well, you don't go out to eat.  That simple.  It infuriates me how many people go out to eat and then say "Oh I'm sorry, we don't have to money to tip much more than a couple bucks".  It's the most BS thing you can imagine and indicative of a spoiled, indulgent culture that also displays all the worst elements of greed and selfishness. 

Yes, improper tipping happens to be a huge pet peeve of mine. 

Bushie, tell mom and dad that you should be upping that tip to 20%.  It's not Northeastern arrogance or new-timey ignorance, but simply a pure moral argument.  Imagine trying to support a family or household or yourself on the bare-ass minimum of what's socially acceptable to tip?  Would Jesus condone that [Inks]?

[Adam Griffin]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

We My parents tip based on the service we receive, but usually try to give at least 10-15% unless they are absolutely horrible.

Like I said...

You do understand that servers, for whatever reason, are allowed to be paid far below minimum wage, must deal with many tables and people at a time, are worked ghastly hours, and still have to live off the relative generosity of others, right?  What the hell would qualify as "absolutely horrible" if they get the food to you?  The food is gonna be ready when it's ready, and that has nothing to do with the servers.  I don't ever give less than 25% unless the server literally slapped me across the face.

Don't harangue Bushie about tipping. It's not like it's ever been his money, anyway.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

We My parents tip based on the service we receive, but usually try to give at least 10-15% unless they are absolutely horrible.

Like I said...

You do understand that servers, for whatever reason, are allowed to be paid far below minimum wage, must deal with many tables and people at a time, are worked ghastly hours, and still have to live off the relative generosity of others, right?  What the hell would qualify as "absolutely horrible" if they get the food to you?  The food is gonna be ready when it's ready, and that has nothing to do with the servers.  I don't ever give less than 25% unless the server literally slapped me across the face.

Don't harangue Bushie about tipping. It's not like it's ever been his money, anyway.

The next post I implored him to bring up a tip hike to his parents on moral grounds.  If they can't afford it then why are they eating out so damn much? 

[King]

Lol @ 10% unless they're awful. Good thing you guys go to chain restaurants where staff turnover is high.  You'd be blacklisted otherwise.

[Lief 🗽]

10-15%??? wtf

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Lol @ 10% unless they're awful. Good thing you guys go to chain restaurants where staff turnover is high.  You'd be blacklisted otherwise.

Heh, another piece to THAT puzzle I suppose.

[Adam Griffin]

The thing about chain restaurants that I think you are all forgetting is that portion sizes there are usually enormous. I suspect that is the real reason the Brown family frequents them exclusively.

That certainly plays into it.

How much does the Clan Bushie tip, I wonder?  In my experience, as a pizza guy in high school and valet in college, the biggest Christians tip horribly.

We My parents tip based on the service we receive, but usually try to give at least 10-15% unless they are absolutely horrible.

Like I said...

You do understand that servers, for whatever reason, are allowed to be paid far below minimum wage, must deal with many tables and people at a time, are worked ghastly hours, and still have to live off the relative generosity of others, right?  What the hell would qualify as "absolutely horrible" if they get the food to you?  The food is gonna be ready when it's ready, and that has nothing to do with the servers.  I don't ever give less than 25% unless the server literally slapped me across the face.

Don't harangue Bushie about tipping. It's not like it's ever been his money, anyway.

The next post I implored him to bring up a tip hike to his parents on moral grounds.  If they can't afford it then why are they eating out so damn much?  

Ah, I missed that. I mean, 15% would be okay assuming they rack up a $100 food tab somewhere perhaps, but we all know they're just swimming around in the Chocolate Fountain at Golden Corral, destroying profit margins as-is. Personally, I usually tip around 30% (because I'm dainty, don't eat much and usually eat frugally when out anyway).