The CrabCake Bureau of Funny Post Archival

[Joe Republic]

Sanders won Foster County, RI. Coincidence? I think not. They know what she did.

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

CRUZ FIORINA

GREAT TICKET!

[Oldiesfreak1854]

CRUZ FIORINA

GREAT TICKET!

To paraphrase Richard Nixon, experience doesn't count.

[Oldiesfreak1854]

So yo you hate southern populists, suburban soccer moms, left wingers, and "tea party" style conservatives? If you were a politician, just who exactly would be your base?

I'm starting to think that BRTD is a Seventh Day Adventist or the like.

[Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook]

Why would anybody see a solo Ringo Starr concert anyways?

Thomas the Tank Engine groupie?

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Okay, it seems we have around 36% of liars. There isn't that much Mormons here.

[Virginiá]

Context: Clinton says half her Cabinet will be women

Inb4 "b- b- but muh meritocracy"

Don't worry, her male picks will be equally bad.

Show me on the doll where Hillary touched you.

[Figueira]

Fiorina lied, my laptop died!

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

Context:

This whole thing reminds me of in Pride and Prejudice when Charlotte Lucas quickly marries the inadequate Mr. Collins although she doesn't love him.  Then they all go visit her and he's fuddling around in the garden and it's very awkward, but she says she think she can be content with the marriage.

[MT Treasurer]

Yes. People are overestimateing Trump.

[White Trash]

Okay, it seems we have around 36% of liars. There isn't that much Mormons here.

But we do have over a significant number of youngins whose mothers wouldn't let them touch a drop of demon rum.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Okay, it seems we have around 36% of liars. There isn't that much Mormons here.

But we do have over a significant number of youngins whose mothers wouldn't let them touch a drop of demon rum.

That didn't stop me.

[This account no longer in use.]

I had multiple classmates who were allowed to drink alcohol. Most of them were crazy.

[White Trash]

Okay, it seems we have around 36% of liars. There isn't that much Mormons here.

But we do have over a significant number of youngins whose mothers wouldn't let them touch a drop of demon rum.

That didn't stop me.

Me neither

[SUSAN CRUSHBONE]

come on now, we can't all be BRAVE REBELS like you two

[White Trash]

come on now, we can't all be BRAVE REBELS like you two

According to the Beastie Boys, underage drinking is the definition of being a Freedom Fighter.

[White Trash]

Context

The only thing that stops a bad guy with a shovel is a good guy looking for a shovel hidden behind several flags.

[IceSpear]

Rubio is gay
Kasich is a 'moderate' dork who wants everyone to love him
Cruz is a super intelligent, introverted sociopath
and Trump is obsessed with the polls.

I think we now know what Atlas foram would be like in the past if it was modarn with like internet or something. Except now it is modarn in the present on a debate stage.

[This account no longer in use.]

Don't forget Yeb? just being generally awkward and out of touch, and mainly living off of his family's success.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Context:

The British Hillary Clinton, you mean?  Except Urquhart's scheming and foul play were far less obvious.

[Landslide Lyndon]

VA KKK leader for Trump.

The Party Is Deciding

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

I'd say the UK is the most economically progressive and Canada the most socially progressive.

[Kingpoleon]

Context

The only thing that stops a bad guy with a shovel is a good guy looking for a shovel hidden behind several flags.

See McDermott?

Get 'im out, get 'em out of here! Use that shovel!

[Mike Thick]

Context:

well…

[Santander]

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Given that the only 2 West Virginians that I know are vastly in the tank for Cruz? I don't see it.

Well, if only two people turn out for Republican Primary in WV, Cruz has got a shot, if turnout is higher than five, he's screwed.