The CrabCake Bureau of Funny Post Archival

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"Have you ever met anyone else who hates Gone with the Wind and believes its right wing?"

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I literally burst out laughing in public yet again. Thanks Lief.

It's terrifying how realistic this is. I wouldn't be surprised if this all happened exactly as you have written it. Bravo old friend.

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Joe, this is the 3rd time you beat me by seconds with something to do with Update in the last two weeks lol. #UpdateCrowd #JustHereForUpdate

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^Classic! How did you dig up a gem from 4 years ago when the guy had 7 posts? Kentucky+incest surely yields a ton of search results.

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"And put a knife to your throat if you are given to appetite. Unless it's a triple bacon cheeseburger from Braum's on one of your cheat days" - Proverbs 23:2, OSV (Oklahoma Standard Version).

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That last one has me burst out laughing twice in public just at the thought of it. Vox Populi has done it again! That's not even his best work.

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Neither of these MIZZed the target!

md is guarntd, wi, il, pa, oh, nh are necessary to a DEM win.

No. NHH in firewall already. Path to vic. includes wi faingold, il Duckworth +1 woman, pa Sextak, oh w/sensible liberal Strcklan.d, and MIZZ. ultra liberal hagen as a backup in nc and chance bozman go down in ar b/c unpopular hutchinson dynasty.

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Once again I literally fell on the floor laughing over an Aizen post. Oh boy, did we miss you this last week

Can you imagine a meeting with those three? Nothing would get done. They'd sit around talking about shopping and boys.

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MUON BROKE HIM!!!

Are we talking about magnetic pole shifts, or the poles for Earth's axis of rotation? They are not aligned with each other.

It was my understanding that a pole shift would alter the axis; or is it the tide change that messes things up? it is what happened last time, wasn't it? as far as the pole and axis, one is perpendicular of the other, isn't it? hum, I guess I'll have to look at all this again. yeah, a pole shift does change the equator. I think I'm confused about this now.

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Challenging Rosa Parks for best "No" quote OF ALL TIME.

Is this some sort of joke?

 No.

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T_host meet Bandit. Bandit, T_host. Sttttrike 3.

 
  It is free for those rich enough with cable TV. Major League Baseball shows baseball game with no fans allowed, a first for the democrat controlled city of Baltimore and MLB. MLB TV has the ceremonial first.

What does this have to do with the Democrats?

oou, nice curve ball.

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LOL! T_host just outdone himself

 Picture this in the form of a question; with the sport of a SCOTUS hearing being the interpretation of the questions that the 9 appointed black robed biases’ do ask - one jurist ask, would a practitioner of law give resistance to its symbol of conscience, the scales held by the blind lady, replaced by, a fat lady singing holding a ballpark size pretzel? And, sealing the symbols point of contention, the pretzel is dripping with the conscience of man (the cheese) and for good measure; the pretzel has a large bite with a little dripping of that conscience from the cheek of the fat lady singing.

 Is there an equivalency of conscience for the lifelong practice of law, its dedication and honor, too that of, one man, one woman lifelong honored conscience of marriage?

 Does this qualify as an animated issue? Subjecting the conscience change to law as that of the conscience change of marriage is being subjected to.

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I've been offered a job in Madison. This would allow me to simultaneously check two boxes off my bucket list: get a new job, and leave Houston.

I'd like to see Atlas Forum change its policy and not allow people to change the user names.

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An angry looking cloud of dust engulfing a barren desert.  Great imagery for the Sanders campaign there.

Hillary still has the Southern firewhale !

"Yee haw!!"

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Perfect!

An Evangelical Christian lying? Never in my wildest Updates.

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Man, I really hope y'all don't mind me doing this, but some of this hindsight is top tier material. Edited to leave in just the relevant parts:

Libertas was a genius who was clearly vastly more intelligent than pretty much everyone else here; which spelled his doom, since the thing people hate the most is when they're arguing with someone who's smarter than they are, and both of them know it.  He typically gave well-thought out, well sourced, intelligent arguments in debates, which he usually won; although he didn't give the time of day to idiots; which typically infuriated them.

---

Read his posting history.  You'll find it to be generally witty, constructive, and intelligent.

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Got a Busch. Nine more in my fridge. My roommate might claim some. Have a chapter meeting at 9:30, so I'll only be drinking the one or two until I get out.

How can you do that if you're underage?

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v0031 if you ever come to Dublin I can give you a tour and I can show you in great detail what 'Junkies' are.

Thank you. That would be so nice.

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We need to rename this thread. Sorry CrabCake.

Context on the first one

Trump casinos arent that interesting anymore. I would rather spend my time revising Valifornia or going to Las Vegas

Give me a break, I'm not the only one who quotes the 272 blue wall, Nate Silver has quoted the blue wall in his analysis, instead of analysin the races as a whole and like 2012. Hes just as guilty.

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Sounds accurate. After SurveyUSA cleaned up their act in Kentucky in 2015, I tend to trust them more than I used to.

They said Conway was going to win. And they were way off downballot as well.

Other polls (like WKU) agreed with SurveyUSA.

It wasn't the polls that were off. It was the election that was off.

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There is no more honest and incorruptible public figure in America today than Mitt Romney.

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I've been avoiding saying this for the longest time in fear of the usual suspects calling me an AAD hack in spite of rarely posting there, but this mine has become an utter disaster. Can we please get a better sense of humour? Posts that barely make me snicker (and I laugh at everything) do not need to be saved for all times.

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As of now, Clinton should win the 2012 map but Benghazi, Veep Castro and an insurgent Trump can take it to the 272 which she still wins.

Context makes this so much better.

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I post this here as someone who is unambiguously pro-life.

Susan Collins isn't a moderate, she's just what passes for one these days.

You're right- she isn't a moderate.  She is just a liberal.  Less liberal than Democrats, but still a liberal.  Being pro-abortion automatically puts one into the liberal camp, as the position is so ridiculous and extreme that it can't even fit into a moderate viewpoint.

What if a Democrat is anti-abortion? Does that make him/her a conservative?
What if a Democrat voted for the Iraq War? Does that make her/him a conservative?
If so, Clinton is a conservative by analogous logic. Being "pro-war" is worse than being "pro-abortion".

No, being pro-life is the centrist/sane position.  Being pro-abortion is a completely irrational, extremist position.  Usually, I can at least understand the liberal position, but this issue is an exception, where I can't even understand their side, as it is painfully obvious that an unborn baby is alive.  Note that even liberal Hollywood subconsciously knows this- on The Big Bang Theory, they had characters say "we made a person" when looking at their unborn baby.