Update XIX: Melancholy and the Infinite Napping
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  Update XIX: Melancholy and the Infinite Napping
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Indy Texas
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« Reply #525 on: November 30, 2014, 07:48:33 PM »

I may lose more weight if I don't have birds chirping in my ear all the time criticizing me for every adverse and boneheaded move.

You haven't lost any weight.
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King
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« Reply #526 on: November 30, 2014, 08:07:14 PM »

Bushie acting like a health expert despite literally being one of the fattest people on the planet at BMI 45 and 0% muscle mass: lol!
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Adam Griffin
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« Reply #527 on: November 30, 2014, 08:17:37 PM »

Wow, guys, I did not ask to be lambasted while I was gone to church.  You think I'm hopeless.  You all, except for J-Mann, are hopeless for pointing fingers and viciously assassinating my character.  You'd think I'd learn and stop updating.  Let me ask this:  When I cease updating would you please stop assassinating my character and my family's character?  I do not want to hear a single, solitary word more of this vicious, no-good, lying, un-manlike garbage.

Your character is sh!t. You have zero self-control, zero work ethic, zero rationality, zero responsibility and zero chance of ever changing until you address all of that. "Un-manlike" is rich, coming from you. Look at all the excuses you've made in just the past few posts: "I don't want to offend people by not eating their food", "you all are making me fat by telling me to eat healthy", "Southern food is healthy because it's what I like", and so on. You sound like are a child.

How about this, guys, you know I can't stay away from the update.  How about we just change the subject and leave me to live my life how I please?  I may lose more weight if I don't have birds chirping in my ear all the time criticizing me for every adverse and boneheaded move.

Which Updater was egging you on at the bowling alley when you decided to shove a greasy cheeseburger down your gullet? Sorry, but you don't get to publish every little detail about your life and then only talk about the ones that paint you in a positive light. You already have a whole group of people in real life who enable your "character" by saying  "Good job, Jeff!" all the time after hearing about all of your "accomplishments" after you invariably put a deceptive spin on them.

This is all part of your act. Hopefully at some point, your enabling parents will wake up, slap the hell out of you, throw all of your belongings out on the front yard, go to Granny's and do the same, toss you out and change the locks. It's becoming abundantly clear that's the only way you'll ever learn to exert any responsibility for yourself in a meaningful way.

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J-Mann
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« Reply #528 on: November 30, 2014, 08:27:21 PM »

How about this, guys, you know I can't stay away from the update.  How about we just change the subject and leave me to live my life how I please?  I may lose more weight if I don't have birds chirping in my ear all the time criticizing me for every adverse and boneheaded move.

Jeff, actually start with ONE THING. Not a promise. Not a plan. Not an "I'll get around to doing that." Just start DOING. You talk so much about changing your life but never execute.

Can anyone suggest a lunch that Jeff can purchase and pack for himself every day (without suggesting some hipster BS like celery veins and half of an apple shadow ... be realistic) so he can get started?

Here's mine:

Get some whole grain tortilla wraps and TURKEY lunch meat. It's not the greatest for you, but healthier than fast food by a long shot.

Spread a small bit of horseradish on a tortilla (not a lot; don't treat it like mayo). Layer some turkey onto a tortilla along with some lettuce, a light amount of LOW FAT shredded cheese. I'd encourage you to dice in some tomatoes and bell peppers, too.

Roll it all up and cut it in half. Get some baby carrots and celery and take a small amount of low fat ranch dressing to dip them in for your side.

That's easy, not expensive, you'll buy enough to use over and over, and best of all, it's a step in the right direction. TRY IT. Don't give me any toddler BS about not liking something ... you haven't challenged your palette for years, and it will take some time to get used to a new diet.

But TRY IT. You no doubt can get to a grocery store tonight and purchase, for probably less than $15, all of the items required.

Stop with the excuses, Jeff. Some of us actually don't enjoy watching a man kill himself and are trying to pry your finger off the trigger.
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Eraserhead
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« Reply #529 on: November 30, 2014, 08:31:59 PM »

Looks like Oklahoma's level of Epic Fail is only topped by Mississippi.
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Joe Biden 2020
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« Reply #530 on: November 30, 2014, 08:34:22 PM »

How about this, guys, you know I can't stay away from the update.  How about we just change the subject and leave me to live my life how I please?  I may lose more weight if I don't have birds chirping in my ear all the time criticizing me for every adverse and boneheaded move.

Jeff, actually start with ONE THING. Not a promise. Not a plan. Not an "I'll get around to doing that." Just start DOING. You talk so much about changing your life but never execute.

Can anyone suggest a lunch that Jeff can purchase and pack for himself every day (without suggesting some hipster BS like celery veins and half of an apple shadow ... be realistic) so he can get started?

Here's mine:

Get some whole grain tortilla wraps and TURKEY lunch meat. It's not the greatest for you, but healthier than fast food by a long shot.

Spread a small bit of horseradish on a tortilla (not a lot; don't treat it like mayo). Layer some turkey onto a tortilla along with some lettuce, a light amount of LOW FAT shredded cheese. I'd encourage you to dice in some tomatoes and bell peppers, too.

Roll it all up and cut it in half. Get some baby carrots and celery and take a small amount of low fat ranch dressing to dip them in for your side.

That's easy, not expensive, you'll buy enough to use over and over, and best of all, it's a step in the right direction. TRY IT. Don't give me any toddler BS about not liking something ... you haven't challenged your palette for years, and it will take some time to get used to a new diet.

But TRY IT. You no doubt can get to a grocery store tonight and purchase, for probably less than $15, all of the items required.

Stop with the excuses, Jeff. Some of us actually don't enjoy watching a man kill himself and are trying to pry your finger off the trigger.

That actually sounds good.  I might substitute a small amount of mustard for horseradish, but the rest of it actually sounds delicious.  There is a Walmart only 3 miles away so I can run down there and be back pretty quickly.
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Gustaf
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« Reply #531 on: November 30, 2014, 08:45:49 PM »

Why on Earth are people still trying to advice him? He's not grateful for your warnings anyway since he thinks it is mean not to encourage his suicide.
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J-Mann
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« Reply #532 on: November 30, 2014, 08:47:45 PM »

How about this, guys, you know I can't stay away from the update.  How about we just change the subject and leave me to live my life how I please?  I may lose more weight if I don't have birds chirping in my ear all the time criticizing me for every adverse and boneheaded move.

Jeff, actually start with ONE THING. Not a promise. Not a plan. Not an "I'll get around to doing that." Just start DOING. You talk so much about changing your life but never execute.

Can anyone suggest a lunch that Jeff can purchase and pack for himself every day (without suggesting some hipster BS like celery veins and half of an apple shadow ... be realistic) so he can get started?

Here's mine:

Get some whole grain tortilla wraps and TURKEY lunch meat. It's not the greatest for you, but healthier than fast food by a long shot.

Spread a small bit of horseradish on a tortilla (not a lot; don't treat it like mayo). Layer some turkey onto a tortilla along with some lettuce, a light amount of LOW FAT shredded cheese. I'd encourage you to dice in some tomatoes and bell peppers, too.

Roll it all up and cut it in half. Get some baby carrots and celery and take a small amount of low fat ranch dressing to dip them in for your side.

That's easy, not expensive, you'll buy enough to use over and over, and best of all, it's a step in the right direction. TRY IT. Don't give me any toddler BS about not liking something ... you haven't challenged your palette for years, and it will take some time to get used to a new diet.

But TRY IT. You no doubt can get to a grocery store tonight and purchase, for probably less than $15, all of the items required.

Stop with the excuses, Jeff. Some of us actually don't enjoy watching a man kill himself and are trying to pry your finger off the trigger.

That actually sounds good.  I might substitute a small amount of mustard for horseradish, but the rest of it actually sounds delicious.  There is a Walmart only 3 miles away so I can run down there and be back pretty quickly.

Mustard is good, too. And the raw veggies as a side are important. This would be a step toward starting to integrate them more and more into your diet and enjoying them.
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Joe Biden 2020
BushOklahoma
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« Reply #533 on: November 30, 2014, 09:20:20 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.
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Indy Texas
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« Reply #534 on: November 30, 2014, 09:21:31 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

?!?!?!
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Grumpier Than Uncle Joe
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« Reply #535 on: November 30, 2014, 09:23:30 PM »

Wow, guys, I did not ask to be lambasted while I was gone to church.  You think I'm hopeless.  You all, except for J-Mann, are hopeless for pointing fingers and viciously assassinating my character.  You'd think I'd learn and stop updating.  Let me ask this:  When I cease updating would you please stop assassinating my character and my family's character?  I do not want to hear a single, solitary word more of this vicious, no-good, lying, un-manlike garbage.

You are hopeless and helpless and your parents and your 95 year old granny are hopeless enablers. They're as bad as you. You'll all have a big laugh when you're a beyond hope diabetic.
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Adam Griffin
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« Reply #536 on: November 30, 2014, 09:27:43 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

?!?!?!

<5 calories per tsp.
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Joe Biden 2020
BushOklahoma
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« Reply #537 on: November 30, 2014, 09:29:35 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

?!?!?!

Your question marks prompted me to check the bottle of mustard that we have in the fridge and it says 1 teaspoon = 0 calories.  This is Griffin's yellow mustard.  I'm pretty sure I've seen the same thing on French's.
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Joe Biden 2020
BushOklahoma
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« Reply #538 on: November 30, 2014, 09:34:11 PM »

Wow, guys, I did not ask to be lambasted while I was gone to church.  You think I'm hopeless.  You all, except for J-Mann, are hopeless for pointing fingers and viciously assassinating my character.  You'd think I'd learn and stop updating.  Let me ask this:  When I cease updating would you please stop assassinating my character and my family's character?  I do not want to hear a single, solitary word more of this vicious, no-good, lying, un-manlike garbage.

You are hopeless and helpless and your parents and your 95 year old granny are hopeless enablers. They're as bad as you. You'll all have a big laugh when you're a beyond hope diabetic.

I am so thankful that I have avoided the dreaded diabetes diagnosis.  I get either my blood sugar or A1C (alternating between the two) checked every six months as part of my routine blood work and not only have I avoided diabetes, but both of them have been perfectly normal, not the least bit high, and I'm not taking any diabetes medication.  Now, I realize that that doesn't say anything about the future and I need to have a healthier approach regardless of past blood test results, but I am beyond blessed, and I'll admit lucky, to have avoided the diagnosis.
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Joe Biden 2020
BushOklahoma
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« Reply #539 on: November 30, 2014, 09:49:09 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

?!?!?!

<5 calories per tsp.

Yeah, even though the bottle says zero officially, I think I saw somewhere that it might actually have like a single calorie or a fraction of a calorie or something.  Very insignificant whether it's 0 or 1.
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Nathan
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« Reply #540 on: November 30, 2014, 09:52:14 PM »

Advent is also a penitential season, but I doubt Bushie or his church will be giving that much thought.

Advent and Christmas are the same seasons.

What? No they're not.

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Well, you shouldn't be because that's not what Advent is there for. It's an entire liturgical season dedicated specifically to the fact that it is not yet Christmas.

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...

.....

.......

...you know what? I'm not even going to dignify that with a response.
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King
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« Reply #541 on: November 30, 2014, 09:52:42 PM »

I'm hoping the wild swings in tone in Bushie's posts are him knowing he's wrong the whole time, even when he's lashing out, and not some sort of manic bipolar problem.
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Matt from VT
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« Reply #542 on: November 30, 2014, 09:53:39 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

?!?!?!

Am I missing something? This seems like some kind of exercise in false outrage.
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Keystone Phil
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« Reply #543 on: November 30, 2014, 10:00:10 PM »

Advent is also a penitential season, but I doubt Bushie or his church will be giving that much thought.

Advent and Christmas are the same seasons. 

You're literally too stupid.
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King
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« Reply #544 on: November 30, 2014, 10:03:08 PM »

Guys, Advent has fasting, charity, and penance in it. It's just impractical. God spoke to the South and told them to get rid of that stuff.
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Indy Texas
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« Reply #545 on: November 30, 2014, 10:05:31 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

?!?!?!

Am I missing something? This seems like some kind of exercise in false outrage.

It has very few calories (not enough to be listed on the label), but the idea that any food derived from naturally occurring plants would literally have zero calories is completely illogical.

We don't want Jeff guzzling down mustard by the jarful and thinking he's found a loophole.
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memphis
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« Reply #546 on: November 30, 2014, 10:09:28 PM »

For the record, the South does not have a much of a history of veggies and nutritious eating. To the contrary, nutritional deficiencies remained epidemic well into the 20th century, to the extent that the federal government had to mandate enriching flour and other staples with vitamins so that people would no longer get rickets, pellagra, and scurvy. People in the Old South ate almost exclusively corn. Not the sweet corn most of us are familiar with, but field corn, which is a grain that requires the same sort of grinding and cooking that wheat, the staple crop in the Northern states, requires. Corn grits, corn bread, and maybe, on a good day, some corn meal fried catfish doesn't make a healthy human anymore than cheeseburgers and soda do, both of which are also heavily reliant on corn. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Rickets

Pellagra

Diabetes:
After googling images of what diabetes does to the body, I decided not to post them because they are very grotesque. Ampuations and massive open wounds and such....
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J-Mann
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« Reply #547 on: November 30, 2014, 10:10:00 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

My dad switched to mustard after having a quadruple bypass a couple of years ago. Mayo is almost pure fat.

This is a good start, Jeff. What will be important is to stick to it. Cut out fast food for lunch. Take that leap. Make a small change, stay with it and add more as you go.
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« Reply #548 on: November 30, 2014, 10:12:23 PM »


The abandonment of the liturgical year and the penitential seasons is all part and parcel of the same complex of bad, self-destructive theology as all the other [Inks]-ed up attributes and beliefs that Bushie insists there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH.
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Joe Biden 2020
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« Reply #549 on: November 30, 2014, 10:18:36 PM »

I just got back from Walmart and got everything you suggested and will fix that for my lunch tomorrow.  I'm glad to know that mustard is good.  I've never liked mayo because of taste and I feel it is less healthy than mustard.  IIRC, and correct me if I'm wrong, the only thing mustard has that's more unhealthy than mayo is more sodium.  Mustard has no calories and very little fat and therefore doesn't add much to the sandwich or whatever its put on except a little sodium.  Like I said, please tell me if that's not true and tell me what the correct figures are.

?!?!?!

Am I missing something? This seems like some kind of exercise in false outrage.

It has very few calories (not enough to be listed on the label), but the idea that any food derived from naturally occurring plants would literally have zero calories is completely illogical.

We don't want Jeff guzzling down mustard by the jarful and thinking he's found a loophole.

Everything in moderation.  That's key.  I definitely don't guzzle it by the jarful especially because of the sodium content.  That's a quick way to a heart attack, IMO.  If I use a small amount, enough to cover a slice of bread, per sandwich or wrap or whatever I'm having, is not going to cause any harm.  I think that's what Jesse is getting at.

As far as the calories, read my response to Griffin.  I know it can't be 0.00 calories.  I'm not that dumb.  I read somewhere it maybe 1 calorie per teaspoon.  It could be 2, but it's definitely inconsequential as far as the daily calorie limit.  Again, though, moderation is key.
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