Update XIX: Melancholy and the Infinite Napping

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I apologize for starting the Blessed Mother-Our Dear Friend debate during the other season.

I enjoyed it. 

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As we must with all Update seasons, we turn to our hero, Russ Powers of Oklahoma who doesn't let a few inches of snow bother him.  He simply conquers it and takes what he wants.




Go Russ.

I hear that he puts a foot on each one and rides across the mountain like it's a damn jet ski.   One snowmobile could never contain Russ, anyway. 

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I can't even fathom how Bushie felt when he talked to Russ Powers Of Oklahoma.  Inadequate doesn't even describe it.  Bushie should stop hanging out with his parents, give up church friend board game night, and beg Russ to take him under his wing.  

Goodbye kiddie parties.

Hello Vegas rooftop raves!

I can't think of a more sound decision for success in life than to spend as much time with Russ as possible.  It's almost insulting, frankly, that Bushie has Russ in such close proximity and doesn't even try to reap the bounty of things awarded through friendship with Russ. 

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No Facebook update this morning... RIP job??

Let's give it until after lunch. 

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I need to eat more vegetables and I will do so.  Maybe not every single meal, but most meals.  As far as exercise, I need to make the time to do it.

Bushie, you treat eating veggies with every meal as abnormal to the point that it is punishment.  It's not.  Far from it.  All people WHO EAT WELL (which should be the very least of your goals) fortify their diet by including fruits and veggies in every meal.  All of them.  Not corn twice a week or the occasional lettuce and cheese salad.  

AND BUY A DAMN MANGO I GUARANTEE YOU WILL LIKE IT!

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I need to eat more vegetables and I will do so.  Maybe not every single meal, but most meals.  As far as exercise, I need to make the time to do it.

No. Make plans to eat vegetables with every meal. That way, when you fall short of your plan, you still eat vegetables most of the time. Always commit to it.

That's a good point.  Always aim high so the lower goals are within reach.

Any supermarket worth a damn will have bags of microwavable frozen vegetables that you can buy in bulk for cheap.  5 bags for $5 has been a staple at Shop-Rite for over a decade.



Each bag contains a side of veggies for at least 3 meals, and they come in many varieties.  Only $0.33 per meal.  You just pop it in the microwave for 5 mins and they steam in bag.  Just add a little butter (a little) and you've got your side.  You can literally have a side of veggies with every meal for a week for the price of just one Braum's combo.  That's 21 times that you can celebrate a little victory by eating healthier for the price of 1 time where you feel the defeat of stuffing a greasy ass burger down your throat.    

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Reposted. You need to address this:

An inability to admit that your refusal to change (in spite of all the sound advice and ENCOURAGEMENT from so many over the years) has COST YOUR FAMILY UNNECESSARY MONEY is cowardly.

You want us to focus on the good? I tried that with you. A lot. Didn't work. You're no better off today than you were when you started this whole saga. And it is costing your family more now than it ever has.

Maybe it's not intentional, but it's deeply rooted in, at best, ignorance. More likely, you prefer only happiness where no one calls you on your BS.

Your inability to implement the smallest of change to better yourself HURT your family today. Wake up, Jeff. Your inaction has consequences that go beyond you!

Are you getting the picture yet? Your refusal to a) actually work to build a career and study your supposed skills, b) take better care of your health and lose weight and c) learn basic life skills like cooking or shopping on your own IS HURTING OTHER PEOPLE. This is not a consequence-free existence, Jeff. And consequences could hurt more than just you.

Are you happy your history ended up in your family spending ultimately unnecessary money on you? Are you happy they're $100 poorer because of it (and don't give me the $79.99 BS ... add taxes, time and travel, and you cost them $100). A positive attitude means nothing if you ignorantly continue to sh:t on other people.

Keep it up, Jeff. Ignore how you're killing yourself. Your family will have to pay for your funeral, too (average of $10,000). How does that make you feel?

I know things must change.  What I need is a new attitude on my health.  I asked God on the way home from work to give me that new attitude and the desire, willpower, and discipline to make the changes I need to make and stick to them.  In a few minutes, after I finish this glass of unsweetened iced tea, I am going to get me a glass of water.  That will make 4 glasses of water (counting the iced tea as water).  That will be a good finish to what was otherwise a rotten food day.  I didn't have breakfast and I had Whataburger for lunch.  That's a big no-no, I realize.  I felt awful this afternoon and my mood wasn't exactly great, either, because I was mad at myself for ordering and eating such slop.  We had beef and noodle casserole for dinner.  I had one and a half scoops and two slices of bread with the aforementioned iced tea.  Tomorrow, I will probably have Chick-fil-a for lunch and try to eat light when I go to the McDonald's on the turnpike for dinner.  I am seriously considering going back to my no fries and no ice cream diet that I did in September.  I will still eat potatoes when they are served to me, but I will not have any French fries.  Yes, my attitude needs to change and slowly, but surely, I will change this attitude.

LMAO!!!!!  Classic Bushie. 

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Talk is cheap, yo. I still remember the Ice Cream Challenge. Thanksgiving is coming up.

Talk is definitely cheap.  I may have a little ice cream on Thanksgiving with my pie, but the non-holy-days I will honor the challenge.  With the Thanksgiving and Christmas clause in the challenge contract, this challenge will expire on December 31, 2014 at 2359.

Thanksgiving is a holy day now?

Any given recognized day somehow owes it to Christianity in Bushie-Land. 

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Since when did Thanksgiving become a holy day again, Bushie?

Since Jesus went back to Earth to feed the pilgrims, os course.

Speaking of... Bushie, can you recall the time of day Jesus descended from the sky with the Declaration of Independence?  I want to know exactly when to set off the bottle rocket from my ass next July 4th.

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Bushie also thinks the 4th of July is a Christian holiday too FYI.

Indeed.  I touched on this a few posts back.

Thanksgiving is a Christian holy day because this country was founded on Biblical principles and the pilgrims celebrated and gave thanks for what God had done for them.  It is a fact that every good thing originates from God.  Today, Thanksgiving is a good time to give thanks for all God has done for us through that year and opens our hearts to the celebration of Christ's birth at Christmas.  Thanksgiving and Christmas are connected and cannot be separated.  Both are Christian holy days and prepares us to receive God's blessings for the coming year.  That's why so many put Thanksgiving and Christmas in the same holiday season.

1. No it wasn't, and it doesn't matter how many times you Christians friggin say it. 

2. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fact - "The usual test for a statement of fact is verifiability, that is, whether it can be demonstrated to correspond to experience."

3. Watch me.

4. Hmmm... I'll make a surprise appearance at a Jewish friend's house and make sure they are eating Chinese, then. 

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What I expressed are my beliefs.  I fully realize and appreciate other people may not hold the same beliefs.  I should have said "I cannot separate the two."  My mistake.

And please substitute "in my opinion" for your declarations of your faith's factuality.

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Hey, folks, I made it back to the Tulsa apartment for the next two nights.  I just paid December rent.  I am going to look at my lease contract and see if it says how much it would cost to break the lease early.  If it is reasonable, I will talk to Dad about it Wednesday night and we can come to a decision on this apartment.  The sooner I can break this lease, the sooner I can get my own apartment in Oklahoma City closer to work and regain my independence.

Bushie, isn't this your apartment?  Do with it what you like.  No need to "put together a game plan".

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But there are no good places to eat there since all he ever goes to is McDonald's on the OK turnpike.

Bushie has the palette of a toddler.  There are other places to eat but he can't be bothered to try anything new.  Bushie, you literally said yesterday that it's time to stop planning and start doing.  Tulsa is friggin 2 hours from OKC.  But you HAD to go to McDonald's because 1900 is too late to have dinner?  In what world is 7pm unreasonable for dinner?  Bullshinks.  You fabricated an excuse to do what you wanted and not what you should be doing.  "Well, gersh dern!  Guess it's McDonald's or nothing!"  Nothing is different.  Same as always.  I understand full well that you did the grilled sandwich earlier at Chick-Fil-A, and even a burger at McDonald's might not get you over 2000 calories or whatever, but your problem is that you are ADDICTED (yes, addicted) to literally the worst food you can imagine.  McDonald's is cheap, processed trash that is horrible for you in any quantity and regardless of what else you ate that day.  Bushie, it's like when I was trying to cut back on drinking.  I would rationalize that one night I only had a few beers with the boys, and thought that victory afforded me a night where I could go to the club and get wrecked.  I didn't successfully cut back until I realized that's a cheap way of going about bettering myself.  The idea is to NOT get hammered/NOT eat things from McDonald's EVER.  This is how you make changes. 

Guys, Our Dear Friend was in very bad traffic in Tulsa last night. When I asked how much traffic could possibly be in a city only the size of Tulsa, I was greeted with a BushOK response but also comments from two others:

"A city is a city."
"Eat your cheesesteak."

Now, upon further review, Tulsa is larger than I imagined (not that I thought it was just some tumbleweed town) but the responses from his friends are so BushOK-esque.

LOL!  The Okies think because they literally only eat the slop we associate with them that the rest of the country must be the same.  People from the Delaware Valley only eat cheesesteaks, Chicagoland only eats deep dish, etc.

Phil, you should hit up a nice Japanese joint in Center City, take a food selfie, and post it to that thread.  You don't have to stand for lard asses from the plains states taking jabs at you when it comes to food.  Northeasterners eat far better than Heartlanders (the area being named, of course, for the enlarged heart that's so common around those parts) and that's not debatable.

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Phil, relax, my brother is just voicing his opinion.  He is allowed to say that Italian pizza is horrible.  There is no need to get all up in arms about that comment.  Letting it get to you is a sign that he's owning you.

Grumps, I just had a small breakfast and will leave a little earlier than planned this evening to eat before I bowl.  I will likely eat at the bowling alley.  I never asked Grandma to do my laundry, but she probably is anyway.

Yea, because you probably just let it pile up endlessly and then when Granny gets fed up, "oh!  Grandma offered and it's so rude to say no!"

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Forgot you were in Tulsa. I'd still recommend ground turkey, turkey bacon and whole wheat bread for Granny's house.

Do you eat sushi?

lol

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What the hell is 'Skip Bo'?  Its name implies healthy exercise, but such a thought is silliness.

Another church-approved activity these lamewads partake in.

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Is this what you call a wild night for church people?  Bowling until 9:00?   Just knowing people like this exist makes me want to reserve the lane next to them, slam back 9-10 shots of Jack, and bowl a few profanity-laced games with a couple crackwhores I met under the bridge.   

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Like this place looks freaking delicious. Like better than a lot of the food I can find in NYC delicious. Why doesn't he try it for dinner tonight?

That actually looks gross to me.

UGH!  I know!  Vegetables are SOOOOOOOOOO GROSSSSSSSSS!



MMMMMMMM!!!  McDonald's!  YUMMY!!!

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With my pathetic bowling scores last night, it gives me a motivation to go to the bowling alley every so often and bowl two or three games by myself in an effort to raise my score and get exercise.  I would like to get back into a bowling league next fall so I can have that regular exercise and have fun for 2 1/2 to 3 hours every week.

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Nestle coming to Bushie's rescue: http://www.businessinsider.com/nestle-is-brewing-a-fat-burning-drink-2014-11

Bushie will definitely consider thinking about buying those, once the holiday season is over.

Is it possible Bushie is worried about being ostrecized by his fellow Okies if he becomes an uppity healthy?

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Ham sandwiches

Bushie, have you given any thought to baby spinach (the green leaves that taste identical to lettuce) and tomato on the ham sammys?  You could take that bland white bread and meat and instantly turn it into a decent enough lunch that comprises all vital food groups.  

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Bushie, just look at the difference

Your current lunch:


Your potential lunch:


Put a little effort in!

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Could you imagine an Atlas road trip where we take Bushie out and try to get him to eat real food?  I think it'd be a big TLC hit to replace that family with a thousand kids.

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Dear lord we have moles infiltrating from The Onion AND Discovery Networks now!?

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I will obviously pick the restaurant we take Our Dear Friend to.

Please spare him from fresh, nauseating authentic Italian pizza, Phil.  And, if we must, could you be so merciful and slather the whole thing in ranch dressing?  Mama Bushie demands only the best for her little angel, and if we can't have Lunchables, Boyardee, or Ellio's let's at least make an effort.