The Seriously? Theatre of Absurdity, Ignorance, and Bad Posts V

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Today, April 19, marks the 20th anniversary of the bombing of the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City.  As you might expect there was a great ceremony in Oklahoma City this morning with President Bill Clinton in attendance as well as Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson and the current FBI director.  I know this nation has never forgotten the events of that day and holds the utmost respect for the citizens of Oklahoma City for showing this nation what it truly means to live by the "Oklahoma Standard".  I also know that this nation has a fondness for the City of Oklahoma City because of how we all came together on that fateful day.  We may joke on this forum that Oklahoma City is full of nobodies, but I know for a fact that the majority of the United States does not think negative about Oklahoma City. They realize how much and how fast we've grown because of our heart and our standard.  Everybody with half a brain realizes that we are so much more than an old, dusty cow town stuck in the 1930's.  Oklahoma City will never go away.  We are some of the strongest group of people you will ever find.

The whole post is absurd and bad but I had to highlight the worst parts.

[Gustaf]

And Sorry Politicus...but reading the first sentence of the Teutons on wikipedia says it all...

A Germanic tribe or Celtic people living in Jutland during Roman times.  Nowadays it means all Germanic language speaking people...which most certainly covers Denmark.

Yes, I know and never said otherwise. Did you not read my post above?

Most Germans and Swedes don't use irony, Danes do it constantly.

That's fair.  It is your deluge too.

Touche.

I'm sorry what? You don't think Swedes use irony? Lol.

Also, if your line is to consistently place irony you think is too obvious here I think that is a bit odd. Especially in the context of several people obviously not getting that Oakvale is ironic. This demonstrates that it is succesful and not bad.

[Ban my account ffs!]

Funny how a guy who has trouble getting chicks to stick claims to be so ironic.  I guess your polarity must be off because you repel everyone away.

As for oakvale...I find him more sardonic and fatalistic than anything.

Oakvale's gem line in an Atlas movie where everyone is forced onto an obnoxious rollercoaster...

Everyone else:  ugh my tummy hurts!  Ugh i hate this!  Ugh whine whine whine

Oakvale:  says nothing.  Just smacks the kid next to him to shut him up... "Oh sorry, that was a big bump". And goes back to suffering the ride in silence.

[politicus]

I'm sorry what? You don't think Swedes use irony? Lol.

No, I said most don't. Which may be hyperbolic, but if so Swedes and Germans certainly use it a lot less often than Danes and in far fewer contexts.

[Gustaf]

Funny how a guy who has trouble getting chicks to stick claims to be so ironic.  I guess your polarity must be off because you repel everyone away.

As for oakvale...I find him more sardonic and fatalistic than anything.

Oakvale's gem line in an Atlas movie where everyone is forced onto an obnoxious rollercoaster...

Everyone else:  ugh my tummy hurts!  Ugh i hate this!  Ugh whine whine whine

Oakvale:  says nothing.  Just smacks the kid next to him to shut him up... "Oh sorry, that was a big bump". And goes back to suffering the ride in silence.

I've no idea what you're talking about. I think parts of it refer to me, but...I don't know what you're saying. No one likes me? I mean, that's either true in which case it'd be a pretty pointless insult in this context. Or it isn't (as I'd be well placed to know ). But either way you're just being an ass.

Politicus, I'm not sure what that is based on really. From my international experience I'd say Sweden counts as a pretty ironic culture and I doubt you'd find such large difference between any of the Nordic countries really.

[they don't love you like i love you]

A Republican? Who knows? Sounds more like something a Democrat would say. Didn't they have a Klansman as Obama's 3rd in line after Biden and Pelosi?

[King]

A Republican? Who knows? Sounds more like something a Democrat would say. Didn't they have a Klansman as Obama's 3rd in line after Biden and Pelosi?

A bad reply to a bad thread.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Oh King...

Both are committing the heinous crimes of winter sport playoffs that last until the summer, 7 game series that really should only be 3 games, and teams with losing records consistently getting wild card spots.

[IceSpear]

kemp was more progressive.

well there was a time when kemp supported affirmative action.  im sure hillary doesnt believe in such things.  the dlc would not be happy.

[they don't love you like i love you]

I can't vote one way or the other on this one.  I always enjoyed rooting AGAINST my high school but at the same time I, therefore, wanted the other school to have cheerleaders so they would win.  It's whatever.  This isn't important.  Slight lean towards FF for it's effect on forced sexual repression. 

I know I'll get prude shouted at me for this, but honestly I view cheerleading as an outcome of the sexual repression in US society. If you had a more healthy attitude towards sex in general (you being American society) I don't think you would come up with the idea of watching underage girls do sexy dancing before high school sports games.

Aside from that cheerleading is hardly exclusive to high school sports it originated as a male activity in college sports in the 19th century.

[Gustaf]

I can't vote one way or the other on this one.  I always enjoyed rooting AGAINST my high school but at the same time I, therefore, wanted the other school to have cheerleaders so they would win.  It's whatever.  This isn't important.  Slight lean towards FF for it's effect on forced sexual repression. 

I know I'll get prude shouted at me for this, but honestly I view cheerleading as an outcome of the sexual repression in US society. If you had a more healthy attitude towards sex in general (you being American society) I don't think you would come up with the idea of watching underage girls do sexy dancing before high school sports games.

Aside from that cheerleading is hardly exclusive to high school sports it originated as a male activity in college sports in the 19th century.

Aside from what?

[they don't love you like i love you]

I can't vote one way or the other on this one.  I always enjoyed rooting AGAINST my high school but at the same time I, therefore, wanted the other school to have cheerleaders so they would win.  It's whatever.  This isn't important.  Slight lean towards FF for it's effect on forced sexual repression. 

I know I'll get prude shouted at me for this, but honestly I view cheerleading as an outcome of the sexual repression in US society. If you had a more healthy attitude towards sex in general (you being American society) I don't think you would come up with the idea of watching underage girls do sexy dancing before high school sports games.

Aside from that cheerleading is hardly exclusive to high school sports it originated as a male activity in college sports in the 19th century.

Aside from what?

Uh, I said it right after that. Aside from that cheerleading is not exclusive to high school sports. It is not, it originated in college sports, cheerleading was a mostly male activity at first, and furthermore, the first female cheerleaders dressed like this:

[Gustaf]

I can't vote one way or the other on this one.  I always enjoyed rooting AGAINST my high school but at the same time I, therefore, wanted the other school to have cheerleaders so they would win.  It's whatever.  This isn't important.  Slight lean towards FF for it's effect on forced sexual repression. 

I know I'll get prude shouted at me for this, but honestly I view cheerleading as an outcome of the sexual repression in US society. If you had a more healthy attitude towards sex in general (you being American society) I don't think you would come up with the idea of watching underage girls do sexy dancing before high school sports games.

Aside from that cheerleading is hardly exclusive to high school sports it originated as a male activity in college sports in the 19th century.

Aside from what?

Uh, I said it right after that. Aside from that cheerleading is not exclusive to high school sports. It is not, it originated in college sports, cheerleading was a mostly male activity at first, and furthermore, the first female cheerleaders dressed like this:

Oh, I misread that. I'm not sure how any of that is very relevant to my post though.

[Ban my account ffs!]

So...Ole finds a bottle along the lakeshore one day and wondering if there's any beer in the bottle, he takes the cap off.  Surprisingly a genie pops out.

"Oh thank you Ole for letting me out of that bottle!  Because you did this, I will grant you one wish."

Ole:  vell, I vant to go back to Norway to see my family but I took the boat over and swore never to do it again...and I don't fly so could you build me a bridge so I could drive over?"

Genie:  oh boy...that's asking a lot.  I mean, that's nearly impossible...even for a genie.  Is there something else you might want?

Ole:  vell, Sven (the Svede) alvays said da norvegians were just svedes with their brains knocked out...so could you make the Norvegians da smartest people on earth?"

Genie:  "do you want 2 lanes or 4 lanes?"

[Ban my account ffs!]

So...Sven died.  But while alive, Sven and Ole promised they would keep in contact so the other would know if heaven was worth it.

Well, both Sven and Ole had two favorite hobbies:  Gardening and baseball.

Anyway, Ole is out in his garden weeding one day, mad at Sven for breaking his promise until he hears Sven's voice from the corner of his ear.  

"Hello Ole."

"Sven you son of a gun, I thought you'd never come back!  What is heaven like anyway, Sven?"

Sven:  "vell, it's actually quite nice.  But I have some good news and bad news."

Ole:  "Gimme the good news first"

Sven:  "Da good news is ve play baseball every day."

Ole:  "and da bad news?"

Sven:  "you're up to bat"


One last one:

Ole is on his death bed.  Barely clinging to life, alone in his bedroom...the delicious aroma of rhubarb pie fresh out of the oven wafts into the room.

Rhubarb pie is Ole's favorite.

So, Ole gathers all the strength he can muster and hobbles down to the kitchen.  On the counter is the pie with a tub of whipped cream.  He takes the knife and just as he's ready to cut into it, Lena walks in...

"Ole!  Get your hands off da rhubarb pie!  Dats for da funeral"

[TNF]

^^^^what the christ

[Ban my account ffs!]

^^^^what the christ

I told those jokes cuz I was reading the arguments between the Scandibrains further up.  They are like siblings who can't stand each other...Norway, Sweden, Finland, and the outer hebrides all hate the father Den Mark.  Sweden (Sven) claims to be the smart child and produces a great Ikea.  Finland marries an Asian chick and when she asks what's wrong with her brother Sven, Fin replies "Nokia".

But both Fin and Swen agree Norgie is as dumb as a box of rocks and are mad at Norgie's fortunes despite being so "dumb".  Norgie finally gets out of Dad's and Swen's control, marries an Irish pixie and moves west.

That is the story of the Scandinavian family.

It works with the Germans too.

Mommy Deutschland is hated by her three sons, Austin, Switzy, and Hal.  Austin claims to be a red bull with wings so he can fly where ever he wants.  Switzy married a half Italian half French chick and she asks "what's wrong with your brother?  Oh, he broke his watch and gambled his money away so he's mad."

But Switzy and Austin can agree that Hal is autistic as hell.  Mom loves him anyway.  But finally out of mom's control...he married an Irish Pixie and moved to England.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

I love the new Snowguy.

[SUSAN CRUSHBONE]

the 6'4'', 250 lb+ "kid" just robbed a store, was running from the cops, then reached into a cop's car to attack him and take his gun to shoot him in his own vehicle. i would have shot the little sh*t myself black, white, or otherwise. wilson was protecting his castle and his own life per training and was justified in using force. - reasoning, usn trained po2, small, medium, heavy arms, police situation, and tactics training

the democrats are wrong on this issue and only use it to stir things up. the majority of wrongful force cases are blown out of proportion due to media response, false reporting, and sensationalization, and the good part of them see legal action on the cops, e.g., http://nypost.com/2015/04/01/cop-that-berated-uber-driver-stripped-of-badge-and-gun/ http://www.wsj.com/articles/police-video-shows-deadly-shooting-of-black-suspect-in-tulsa-1428913303

you younger kids coming on the internet and complaining about life or death, high pace situations from an armchair or beside a video game console is laughable and why the millennials really need to mature a bit more, i really hate my generation sometimes.

screw his memorial.

[memphis]

In purely humanitarian terms, the long-term outcome of the Iraq War looks better at this point than either the continuing disintegration of the Baathist state (or, worse, its revival) would have been.

[SUSAN CRUSHBONE]

and here we go again with the old "jesse helms was a racist" argument. i met someone who knew him and this is far from the truth. just because someone opposes affirmative action (because you know it's racism in itself) and doesn't think mlk day should become a holiday (because you know when you make a federal holiday its not the most fiscally responsible thing, it doesn't matter who it's for) and is a white man from the south doesn't make him racist. and the "so-called" elevator incident, that was taken completely out of context. helms being a racist is just a strawman used by the left to paint the gop as the racists although they were the ones that fought for civil rights and to end slavery. at the same time they completely ignore robert byrd, kkk member and senator until five years ago.

[Sol]

North Carolina doesn't have a deep history of racism.

[World politics is up Schmitt creek]

This thread starts off already bad and degenerates fast.

[Brittain33]

Bold added for emphasis.

- So, then, why do I support civil unions and gay adoption? Because, ultimately, raising children in a same sex home is probably a better situation than raising them in an orphanage, and it only makes sense to provide some limited incentives to get that adoption to happen.

[Torie]

This thread starts off already bad and degenerates fast.

Well I joined it, for better or worse, after noting your post.