Update XX: A Darn Good Judge of My Financial Situation

[King]

ODF "good ability to take criticism" is going to be greatly tested in the coming days.

[King]

Bushie,  the fact you fail to admit your life is in shambles, is part of the  reason you are in your current situation

Again, have I ever said things are perfect?  There's nothing wrong with looking at the bright side of life.  Things could be much better, but they could also be way worse.  I will say again, I have nothing to be ashamed of right now.  I have nothing to worry about.  If God be for me, who can be against me?

I honestly have to ask you, what do you consider "things are going bad?" Your parents being eating by wolves?

Among white American 30-39 yr old males born to middle class households, I'd say your quality of life is about 5th percentile.  Most of the people below you have terminal cancer and heroin addictions. Actually, some heroin addicts probably are above you.

Do you ever want to find love? Do you ever want to be not only independent of your parents but pay to buy them nice things? Do you ever want to feel healthy and not plagued with constant aches and pains?

[King]

Bushie, you're the one supposed to be serving God. You're treating it the other way around.

"Bushie needs a job. Chop, chop, Lord."
"Oh, Jesus, I'm getting a little fat. How about you get off your butt and do a miracle for me?"
"Thanks for being a dear, King of Kings. You know I could have never done it without you! It's so hard to find good help these days!"

[King]

Bushie won't consider driving for Uber, guys. Don't ask me why. He just won't do it.

[King]

Bushie, what about our suggestion to start ubering?

Ride-sharing? You guys are just trying to trick him into an obvious scam!!!

He's going to an archaic job fair and getting a real opportunity!

[King]

The long car ride could also be a great platform to sell Ameriscam.

[King]

And if he's lucky, he might pick up a family with children, giving him an opportunity for a quick "loving on" as he drives them to their destination.

The more I think about it, the more I'm convinced an Uber Season would really be great for the series as a way to introduce more locations and characters.

[King]

What's this uber you're talking about?

Cab driver service where you use your own car.

Bushie should take it to it, it's a similar "be your own boss" setup of Ameriplan/Kirby only it's a product people buy and not a scam.

[King]

You all might, I repeat might, be proud of me:  My church friend (the one I went bowling with Thanksgiving weekend), knows I am looking for a job, so he sent me a Facebook post for an AT&T call center job fair this Saturday in NW Oklahoma City.  I laughed and moved on back to my CAD searching.  I gave it no consideration whatsoever.  I don't even remember the address except the street it was on.  I thank him for thinking of me, but I am done with call centers.

Brilliant setup. I think I know where this is going.

[King]

If the family expects you to stick around for EIGHT DAYS to see relatives that you see four or five times a year, they're being selfish. If that's really how you feel, see them for a day or two and then leave. In all likelihood, they'll think more of you if you are trying to make it on your own. They're probably having private conversations like, "Can you believe that Jeff is STILL at home? What is he doing with his life? If that were me, I would be out looking for jobs or living my life and not mooching off the family."

You'll never know, because they'll be super-polite to your face and give you the impression they'd be hurt if you didn't stick around for their week-and-a-half visit.

Cut the cord, Jeff. Trust me, the family will be OK.

The only thing that will keep me around until January 25 is I have committed to teaching Sunday School at church the next two Sundays.  I want to honor that commitment, as it would be hard for them to find someone else to teach them so quickly.  After that morning service, I have no more 'obligations'.  I am thinking going back to Tulsa on the afternoon of January 25 is looking better and better.

So quickly is 10 days from now. There's a Sunday service on the 18th where the preacher can ask if anyone wants to teach Sunday school on the 25th.

If you're not going to work, can you at least perform acts of charity like work at a soup kitchen?

[King]

Bushie, did you know that the average full time Uber driver makes $30,000 a year in fares and tips with some making as much as $90,000?

[King]

If the family expects you to stick around for EIGHT DAYS to see relatives that you see four or five times a year, they're being selfish. If that's really how you feel, see them for a day or two and then leave. In all likelihood, they'll think more of you if you are trying to make it on your own. They're probably having private conversations like, "Can you believe that Jeff is STILL at home? What is he doing with his life? If that were me, I would be out looking for jobs or living my life and not mooching off the family."

You'll never know, because they'll be super-polite to your face and give you the impression they'd be hurt if you didn't stick around for their week-and-a-half visit.

Cut the cord, Jeff. Trust me, the family will be OK.

The only thing that will keep me around until January 25 is I have committed to teaching Sunday School at church the next two Sundays.  I want to honor that commitment, as it would be hard for them to find someone else to teach them so quickly.  After that morning service, I have no more 'obligations'.  I am thinking going back to Tulsa on the afternoon of January 25 is looking better and better.

So quickly is 10 days from now. There's a Sunday service on the 18th where the preacher can ask if anyone wants to teach Sunday school on the 25th.

If you're not going to work, can you at least perform acts of charity like work at a soup kitchen?

January 25 will be soon enough.  I do want to visit with the family quite a bit and not rush off too soon.  I don't need to stay all 8 days, but I can stay 4 or 5 days.

Are you meaning that I've given up on working?  Have you not been following my application count?  I can still look for a job in Tulsa even though I'm in OKC.

I'm not saying you've given up on working. But it's pretty much guaranteed you will not be employed for the next 10 days, so maybe something constructive other than napping would be nice.

[King]

Meh, the weight gain isn't a big deal. He's just going through a 6 year rough patch of financial problems and not feeling like exercising. He'll turn it around eventually.

[King]

So, it would be very rude for you not to stay over for 10 days and have them prepare meals for you as well.

[King]

Forgive us, Bushie. Considering most of us post here on break from our full-time jobs and/or graduate school, we don't all have the mental time or energy to pick up on all of your more intricate explanations as to why a nap and vacation was well-earned.

[King]

How many job applications are you filling out right now?

[King]

No job applications filled out on Friday Fun Day! #TGIF

[King]

It would be anti-American to not dine at TGI Friday's on Friday.

[King]

The minor rough patch now includes dizziness and sleep apnea. RIP Bushie. Dead within a year. Sad to see Update end so soon.

[King]

Have requirements for partial or full disability been looked into, out of curiosity?

And it's not hard to get an appt. with a physician. You don't have to try to do that. You just get one, unless you want in now, in which case they probably won't have any slots open.

As far as the disability, I have not really looked into it, because I still believe I can work just like everyone else.

As far as the doctor.  He is a busy doc.  I can sometimes get an appointment if I call before 0815 every morning, and even that's really too late.  His cancellations fill up very fast.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5SNAluOj6U

[King]

I don't think creating a morbid obesity related deadly illness counts as dying in the name of Jesus.

[King]

If Bushie actually had the ambition to take a solo backpacking trip across Europe, he wouldn't need to do it because he wouldn't be Bushie and there would be no problem.  It's the same as the ideas that Bushie should start experimenting with drugs or join an recreational adult sports team.

Bushie is a man with ambitions of one day living in Jacksonville, Florida. Any attempt to get him to embrace life is barking up the wrong tree.

[King]

If Bushie actually had the ambition to take a solo backpacking trip across Europe, he wouldn't need to do it because he wouldn't be Bushie and there would be no problem.  It's the same as the ideas that Bushie should start experimenting with drugs or join an recreational adult sports team.

Bushie is a man with ambitions of one day living in Jacksonville, Florida. Any attempt to get him to embrace life is barking up the wrong tree.

That's sort of the paradox of Update, isn't it? This is a guy who spends his free time napping, watching the most boring/pointless football/baseball games (that he himself likely has no emotional investment in either), eating the most boring food, and going to church, yet here we are, glued to his life story for the past five and a half years.

It's high art. Action and exciting sets is for pea brains.

[King]

Update definitely has a lot of parallels to Boyhood imo.

I'm not sure Bushie can make it 2021 for it to be a 12 year experience, though.

[King]

goddamnnnn bushie
i hate using this but

"smdh"