The Devil's Parliament: An Alternate Reality UK Parliament TL by Mechaman

[Mechaman]

During Christmas Break I had a series of conversations with Vega about UK politics (okay it was mostly about Home Rule, but we did venture a little bit into contemporary UK politics) and it sort of stirred an interest in me in pursuing a Westmanesque timeline based in the UK after Thatcher's victory in 1979.  It will be written much in the same style as Westman, though with multiple protagonists.

I will have a few summary posts up later on describing the setup and the main character(s).

-Mecha

Note: If anybody wants to help me with research or corrections in the process of writing this I would much appreciate it.  Admittedly I am not greatly educated on Brit politics (especially "constituencies", lol).

[Mechaman]

The Leads:


Arthur "Art" J. Gannon (Conservative-Bath) Born August 8th, 1948 to a wealthy industrial scion and his French socialite wife while the couple was in vacation in Normandy, Gannon grew up on the family's estate outside of Bath in the county Somerset.  Gannon graduated near the top of his class (fourth) at Oxford in 1976 and enjoyed a brief career as a barrister until he won election to represent the Bath constituency in the 1979 elections.  He has been married to Selicia (nee Meckenberg), an American doctor, since November 28, 1977.  The couple is expecting their first child to be born in October.  Ideologically, the Conservative Gannon, who beat out party favorite Chris Patten for the nomination, considers himself to be a pragmatist and "independently minded".  He has made several statements critical of the UK's relationship with South Africa, whose apartheid policies he has strongly opposed since his days at Oxford.  He is also an open social moderate, having gone on record opposing discrimination against gays and support of abortion rights.  However, on most of the other issues he considers himself "a child of the Thatcher revolution", especially on denationalization and reducing the tax burden on top earners.  He has been called "a Conservative with a conscience" by some of his Labour colleagues due to his opposition to further relations with South Africa.

David "Dave" Francis O'Ronan (Labour-Leeds West) Born January 9th, 1942 to an immigrant Irish family in Leeds, "Dave" O'Ronan grew up in a labor union household.  His father, Miles O'Ronan, was a party organizer of the UK Communist Party until 1945, when he changed membership to the Labour Party after being won over by Labour platform of that year (particularly in regards to industry nationalization).  His mother, Nora (nee Flaherty), was an Accountant who was also involved extensively with Labour Party machinations in Leeds.  Not a very gifted student in primary or secondary schooling, "Dave" was able to land a position in a local union due to the connections of his father.  Eventually ascending to the status of Vice President of the local union, "Dave" used said connections to launch his bid into politics, getting elected to the UK Parliament in 1975 representing Leeds West.  His ideology is typical of his neighborhood and he has emerged as a bitter critic of the Margaret Thatcher.  MP O'Ronan is unmarried, though there are rumors of a romantic relationship between him and his secretary Sharon Kowalski.

More will come as I go back to the drawing board for minority party figures.

[Mechaman]

Gannon Estate
Election Night 1979:

Announcer: We can announce that by a more than twenty point margin, the Conservative candidate Arthur J. Gannon, has won election to represent the Bath constituency-
Gathered family and friends in room: YES!
Herbert Gannon, father of the candidate: Frank!  Round of Brandy all around the house!  This is a momentuous occasion!
The candidate stands up in the sitting room and waves his father down.
Art Gannon: Father father, no need for such extravagance.  There was no way I was ever going to lose this seat.  It's safe Conservative.  What we should really be waiting for are the other results, which by judging by our margins IT'S A LANDSLIDE BABY!  LOAD US UP FRANK!
Frank the Butler goes around filling cups to the brim as the assembled company gathers round the tv.
Announcer: though there was very little doubt of victory, the size of the margin of Gannon's victory suggests a large victory for the Conservative party later on.
Herbert: Well this is just fantastic news my boy.  Of course, after the failure that has been Callaghan, I guess it would have been insane to think otherwise.  Though after living with decades of nationalizations and and criminal taxation policies you would never know.  There are a lot of naive idiots out there after all.  Did your hear what that one man from Leeds was suggesting just last night?
Art laughs.
Art: OH yes, that the rich should get used to not keeping much money?  Yeah what a great messaging.  And that was before he went on and on about how the government should be taking over more "necessary" industries.
Herbert: Indeed.  We are being ruled by a bunch of incompetent extremists, a situation that should be rectified in a f/ew months.  With decades of experience hopefully said extremists will be limited to those areas.  We have seen the end of Hell's Parliament truly.  I for one will be glad to finally bring much of our investments home after years of exile.
Art: When even John Lennon complains about the tax policy of the country you know there is a problem.  I foresee a great new era for this country.  We will bring an era of strong yet compassionate conservatism for the masses.  I just hope that I can be a voice for reason among some of the more hardened among us.
Herbert: If you are talking about Thatcher's stance on South Africa. . . . .
Art:. . . . it damages our standing as the party of a high moral standing.  Racial segregation is a noxious policy that does not bode well for the current and future Conservative dominance.  We must convince the disadvantaged that we support the policies that will bring them out of their long cycle of dependence upon the state leviathan, or risk keeping them in Labour ranks for the unforeseeable future.
Herbert: We can't be all things to all people, Art.  We have to accept some losses among some groups while solidifying our support among others.  Like the white middle and upper classes.
Art:  Go and tell that to the O'Hallorans of the world.
Herbert laughs.
Herbert: Like I said son, you can't win them all. . . . ..

[Vega]

Looks pretty interesting so far. I'll be following it.

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

Interesting. Is Cannon a semi-parody of American "Rockefeller Republicans", or am I over-interpreting? In any case, keep it up!

[Mechaman]

Interesting. Is Cannon a semi-parody of American "Rockefeller Republicans", or am I over-interpreting? In any case, keep it up!

No not really.  I mean yeah, Gannon (I changed it after I accidentally typed in his name like that throughout the first post, lol) is upper class but he by and large agrees with the very Conservative agenda of Thatcher (and as it is, wasn't Thatcher herself pretty pro-choice?), he just disagrees with a very few high profiles stances of the government, particularly Apartheid.

If anything I imagine him to be closer to a Goldwater type character.

[Mechaman]

The O'Ronan House
Leeds, The Night Before:

Shannon O'Ronan, niece of the candidate: How long are you in town for, Uncle?
Dave O'Ronan looked at his 17 year old niece, her striking brown hair and blue eyes penetrating his, as he stood in front of the fire.
Dave: Well, just for a few days.  I fear the election results will not bode well for us.  I'd like to have enough time to show up for the necessary crowd rally, sit down in front of the family telly to watch the incoming disaster, and have my merry drink.  And yes, you are allowed to have a few yourself kid.
Shannon laughs.
Shannon: You were always my favorite uncle.
Dave: It's probably because I'm the only one who isn't shackled yet.
Shannon: Will you ever get married, Uncle?
Dave laughs.
Dave: I don't know.  Maybe someday.  But not today, no siree.  I know, I'm 37 bleedin' years old, but I still haven't felt the need to settle down.
Shannon: That Sharon certainly is a lovely woman, is she not?
Dave: Oh so you have been keepin' tabs on me have ya?
Shannon laughs.
Shannon: Well, like I said you were always my favorite.  Now how about that drink?
Dave laughs as he walks towards her, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her on the head.
Dave: Child, you sure do know how to work your good Uncle into giving you what you want.  Be thankful your mum and dad aren't here, they sure would give one hell of a lecture.
Shannon: Tis only booze, Uncle.  Lot of my friends are on weed and the crank rocks.  I wish the old people would just settle down.
Dave: So how is their trip to Africa going anyway?
Shannon: It's going famously.  I got a letter the other day.  They truly believe they are doing "god's duty" or something over there.
Dave: Well that figures.  Still holding onto their faith and "the god man".
Shannon: Uncle Dave, don't tell me you are back in your atheist phase again?  I mean, you know how much Aunt Laura hates that-
Dave: You know this family makes me laugh sometimes.  I mean, why do they think our parents were communists anyways?  Because that is what the Pope man wanted?  So fecking hilarious the lot of them.
Shannon: Oh Uncle, don't use that dirty word.  You don't want many people to hear you openly admit to that.
Dave laughs.
Dave: Oh what?  That I am a Commmunist?  WELL ALRIGHTY THEN!  HEY WORLD!  I AM A FUCKING COMMUNIST!  I READ THE COMMUNIST MANIFESTO AND DAS KAPITAL, AND I LIKED THEM BOTH!  THERE IS ALSO NO GOD AND HE IS DEAD!  ALSO THE COLD WAR IS A FUCKING JOKE AND IT SHOULD END!  LONG LIVE LENIN!
Shannon laughs.
Shannon: You just never take anything seriously, do ya?
The phone is ringing, Shannon answers it.
Shannon: Hello?  Oh good evenin to you too.  Oh yeah he's here.
Shannon mouths it's your girlfriend! to which Dave returns a mock grin to her before picking up the phone.
Dave: Oh hey, how're ya?
Sharon Kowalski: Hey ya handsome.  Guess where I'm at?
Dave: I love it when ya talk dirty.  Hey, are those bells I'm hearing?
Just at that moment Dave hears bells in the background, both on the phone and off it.
Sharon: OH yes, you didn't think you could get away from me that easy, did ya?
Dave: People are goina start talking ya know?  You are becoming quite bold, Miss Kowalski.
Sharon: Oi, you think that's bold fella?  Wait till you see what I am wearin!
He hears the phone slam on the other end.
Shannon looks at him excitedly.
Shannon: So, am I finally going to meet this "secretary" of yours?
Dave has this big grin on his face.
Dave: Well . . . . . .yes.  I just hope you are ready for her.

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

Interesting. Is Cannon a semi-parody of American "Rockefeller Republicans", or am I over-interpreting? In any case, keep it up!

No not really.  I mean yeah, Gannon (I changed it after I accidentally typed in his name like that throughout the first post, lol) is upper class but he by and large agrees with the very Conservative agenda of Thatcher (and as it is, wasn't Thatcher herself pretty pro-choice?), he just disagrees with a very few high profiles stances of the government, particularly Apartheid.

If anything I imagine him to be closer to a Goldwater type character.

Ah. The only real reason why I asked this was his opposition to Torie policy on South Africa, thus making him "fiscally conservative, socially liberal, and pro-civil rights", in the footsteps of other giants of history like Dwight D. Eisenhower, Nelson Rockefeller, George Romney, and John Lindsay.

Also, lol "crank rocks".

[Dr. Cynic]

Looks good man. I'll be available to help out more in April, but I'll still be reading this.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

If you can turn it into an epic long duel, like Heath-Wilson, that'd be splendid.

[Mechaman]

O'Ronan House Cont.

Dave O'Ronan opens the front door of his family's (now his brother's, he guessed) house.  The house that had for a couple of generations housed O'Ronans since his family moved there in 1940.  His parents had settled down when they were already well in years, having met each other as Communist Party activists in Leeds.  They settled down in 1938 and bought the house with what money he had earned as an office manager and her an accountant for a union law firm over the years.  It was not a bad place, two stories with three bedrooms upstairs and a couple of loos, and time had not faded it's charm.  His elder brother James, his wife Wilma, and their only daughter Shannon now inhabited it.
Anyway, this is getting sidetracked. . . . .where were we?
Oh yes, where Dave opened the door, of course.
Before him stood a most magnificient creature.  5'3", translucent white skin, hip length hair the color of a raven, and a nice and fit body wrapped in a large overcoat, Sharon Kowalski was both Dave O'Ronan's secretary and his lover.  He had hired her a few years ago after his former secretary (and former best friend) Gerald Pulaski (yes, he grew up knowing a lot of Poles, but don't we all?) abruptly tendered his resignation.  He would be a liar if he did not notice that she made a quite lovely figure to look at in his office, but it also helped that she had the most amazing type speed he had ever seen in his short career as a Labour MP.  Hired in Augusts 1977, it wasn't until earlier this year Dave had found his courage with her.  Ever since then. . . . oh wow boy he felt great.
We can't discuss their love life in much detail, because of the recent fire safety regulations put into place to protect the innocent.
Sharon walks up seductively to him, pulls his head down to her (he was 6 ft even) and forced her tongue into his mouth for a good minute or so, making sure he had enough time to get his hands through all the right places.
Sharon: Hey lover, I missed you.
O'Ronan, all 6' 215 lbs (he was a little out of shape since coming into Parliament), looked down at her with his hazel eyes as she played with his sandy brown hair.
The two went in arm-in-arm where Shannon was in the living room.  She had just prepared herself a drink when she noticed Sharon.
Shannon: Hello there!  You must be that pretty little secretary that me uncle has been talking about non-stop.
Sharon: (silently) You told your niece!?
O'Ronan laughs.
Dave: Oh yes, I tell her everything!
Sharon: That's a bit, well, inappropriate?
Dave: She's a grown woman she can handle it!  Besides, she's practically the closest thing to a daughter I might ever have (Shannon blushes), so why shouldn't I tell her everything?
Sharon: Even the sexcapades?  By the way, your uncle really needs to work out kid.
Everyone dies laughing.
Shannon: So is that what he meant by "feels like I'm shaggin a 15 year old?"
Sharon gives O'Ronan a horrified look until she realizes that Shannon is trying extremely hard to hold back laughter.  She picks up a nearby blanket and throws it at her.  Shannon falls down onto a nearby couch, giggling like a lunatic.
O'Ronan goes to the liqour cabinet and prepares a rum and coke.
Dave: Well I see you two are going to get along just famously.  So love, what is the latest news?
Sharon laughs nervously.
Sharon: Besides news that the party is completely screwed?
Dave throws the entire glass down his gullet.
Dave: Fair enough.  We win some we lose some.  How big?
Sharon: Many pollsters expect the Cons to get up to 330 seats, if not more.
Dave: Jesus. . . . . . could be worse I guess.  If the Wicked Witch completely screws up we could possibly get it back in a few years.
Sharon: Still a mandate and a majority babe.  Enough to cause some very real damage.  Gone are the days of the reasonable 70% tax rate proposal.  Now, we have a very real possibility of 25% tax rates, strikes met by unrelenting police actions, police state in Northern Ireland.  It wouldn't surprise me if these wankers even try to privatize health care.
Dave: Blazes woman, don't even joke about that.  With our current leadership it is scary enough to imagine the next few years.  Imagine what if Callaghan steps down. . . . . . the likely successor-
Sharon: Can't stand Healey, what a wanker.  If things went his way we would be little different from those useless feeble Liberals.
Dave: Aw yes, well we better hope then that the Witch's term ain't a smashing success, don't you say?
[bSharon/b] Why yes, I suppose so.  What are your plans for tomorrow night?
Dave: Make a few speeches, get sloshed, cry in my sleep over the results.
Sharon plays with Dave's collar.
Sharon: I was thinking of doing something a bit more stenous, like hit up a few of the neighborhoods to maximize our turnout.  If there is anything we should be doing at this time it is to give you, my dear, as strong a mandate as possible.  Otherwise, you will find yourself targeted by right wingers next time around.
O'Ronan finishes his drink.
Dave: Fair enough.  I guess that is what we'll do!  Now, when do we get to have sex?
Sharon looks at him seductively.
Sharon: My agenda is wide open tonight, how about yours?
The two kiss before proceeding upstairs.
Dave: Shannon!  I am calling it a night!
Shannon: Well Uncle, try to be a quiet this time!  Some of us have school and jobs to go to y'know!

[Mechaman]

Gannon Estate Cont.
Election Night:

Selicia Gannon sits down next to her husband with a cup of tea in her hand.
Selicia: So, what is on the agenda of the next PM of Bath?
Selicia Gannon was a beautiful young blonde woman from Norfolk, Virginia in America.  Two months younger than Arthur, they had met in London a little bit after Arthur had graduated from law school at Oxford.  The courtship was quite short but passionate.  And now she was expecting their first in October.  She was very reluctant when Arthur first announced his plans to run for office, but over the past few months she has gotten used to the idea.  Bath wasn't that far away from Parliament.
Art: Well, I have a great many things planned.  This country needs innovation and the promise of a healthy economy to get the spirits going.  I am sure Madam Thatcher will have the proper course for the rest of us to follow.
Selicia: Well almost everything.
Art: There are some unfortunate elements, to be sure.  However, I am fully convinced that it is the Conservative platform that will bring prosperity to the nation.  With the years of economic failures and the so-called "Winter of Discontentment" it is time that many people reaccess their priorities.
Jacqueline "Jackie" Gannon, Art's mother and a striking woman for her age, takes a seat on the large couch next to Selicia.
"Jackie" You must get used to being part of the life of the public dear.  It is a social responsibility we have to accept, given our wealth and position.
Selicia takes hold of Jackie's hand.
Selicia: I know, Jackie.  It is just so much different than in America.
Herbert Gannon takes a puff from his pipe, nodding.
Herbert: Yes I would imagine so.  Politics over here are much less suspect to errr, populist intrigue.  Over here no man is greater than his station.  Yes, having a President and a Senate sounds so. . . . . progressive, until you consider the sort of entitlement and egotism those positions seem to instill on those who hold them.  Promises then are made solely for the purpose of winning voters.  Over here our MPs are a bit more. . . . . humble in their service to th Crown.
Selicia: Forgive me if this sounds rude, but as an American I am struggling to understand what is so great about the Crown.  As insincere as many American politicians are, our system at least doesn't grant individuals power due to the family they are born in.  Nobody is born over in America with the expectation that the public will fund their lifestyyle.
Herbert: A fair point, but then what do you call your welfare system?  Your Social Security administrations and other large scale government offices?  In the end, Americans expect to be treated like Kings and Queens.  That sort of mentality really has not helped the cause of American Exceptionalism, now has it?
Selicia: Granted, but what do you credit to your own welfare state excess?  Rich people taxed at 95%?  Widescale industry nationalizations?
Herbert: Say what you want to about our monarchs or the entire purpose of monarchy, the British one is a fair one.  Elections are allowed to happen and the people elect the people who decide the laws.  Our monarchs are many things, but they are not tyrannical autocrats.  However, the fear and respect of their authority  is what keeps even our radical Labourite kin from going off the deep end.  In America politics is a very expensive marketing campaign about which candidate gets the most money.  Over here it is about, shockingly, which policies serve best the interests of the people in the name of a higher power, the Royal Family of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.  You may not like the idea of royalty, you might even think it eliltist, but it does have a purpose.
Herbert takes a drink.
Herbert: But, might I just take a moment to say that our son picked a most intelligent and charming wife?
Selicia blushes.
Art: Always a charmer you are father.  The nuances of the system seem shocking to many an American.  Needless to say, the elitism is a little concerning and we must do more to appeal to the common man and the working class as Conservatives.  Unfortunately, our party has too long been stigmatized as the party of only the rich.  The last few years probably has shackled their thinking.  We must defend good and honest policy against the excessses of Labour infighting and strife.
TV Anchor: And now, the results from Leeds West.  We can now announce that the incumbent, David O'Ronan, Labour Party, has won by a margin of over 10,000 votes.  The strong victory, coming off the heels of a last minute campaign push by O'Ronan on the beheast of other Labour Party officials, should be some relief to the left wing of the Labour Party as the results nationwide spell doom for short term aspirations.
The screen switches to a tall sandy haired man in a tan suit behind a podium.
O'Ronan: This is truly a victory for the working people of Britain.  While I had no doubt of my re-election and the faith of the people of Leeds-West, I have immense hope that this victory and the strong victories of Labourites in this area will inspire the people to hope for the future in these dark times.  While I have strong disagreements with what is going to be a for sure Conservative government, I will work with them to find areas of agreement on the issues that affect this country.  But most importantly, I will remain a strong voice and a strong defender for the working class of this country!
(loud applause)
Herbert: Oh this guy again!?  You think anybody believes that?  What a snake!
Art: Oh yes, Dave O'Ronan.  A young up and comer in the Labour Party.  Single.  Of Irish origins.  Not very religious, some suspect even atheist.  His parents were Communists. . . . . . .
Selicia: YOU'RE KIDDING ME!
Herbert: Not a surprise really.  Labour in 1945 was almost outright friendly with the Soviets.  It was only when it was revealed that Stalin was a genocidal maniac that they suddenly got nervous about it.  I would suspect that a great many young Labour members were children of Communists.  Hell, a number of current Labourites were probably Communists in the past.  It is concerning, but hardly surprising. . . . . especially given his origins.
Art: Yes, his father marched with Connolly.  His words do ring very hollow.  I would keep a watchful eye of this man.  If my intuition means anything, he will go places.
Art and Herbert have a drink.

[Mechaman]

At the Podium
Leeds West:

O'Ronan takes out the collar holder and wipes off the sweat from his face.
O'Ronan: Damn it!  Do they have to make those cameras so bright!  All I was doing was giving a victory speech, not doing a Page 4 spread!
Shannon laughs.
Shannon: A bit hot under the collar uncle?
O'Ronan: Quiet you!  By the way, where is my lady?  Where is Sharon?
Shannon: She went to the loo.
O'Ronan could not believe what he was hearing.  Here was his (somewhat) big election night, and his girlfriend went to take a shat?  I mean what in the bloody hell?  Didn't she know how much this meant to him?  Selfish tw-
That is when he feels Georgie McCarney, one of his long time school chaps and his current legal advisor, pull on his sleeve.
McCarney: Oi ya Dave!  Look at these figures we got tonight.
O'Ronan looks at the figures and gives a very non-plussed look.
O'Ronan: Bloody loaded questions these pollsters ask.  "Do you believe that Dave O'Ronan can balance the interests of multimillion dollar corporations and workers?"  What's next?  "What is Dave O'Ronan's opinion about hereditary titles?" "What is Dave O'Ronan's opinion of the Queen?  Does he think she should stuff it?"
McCarney: Wouldn't surprise me with these fockers.  Well now that the election night is over, howse about you and me get a drink?
O'Ronan laughs as he pulls out a cigarette.
O'Ronan: Drink my boy?  I'm on the bofftrain tonight.  Sharon is still a young lady.  She can't have a drunken old fat man in bed with her.
McCarney: Well you are not getting any younger or skinnier mate.  You might as well have a few drinks with us.
O'Ronan: Hey two out of three ain't bad, as that one fat American singer once said.  Whatse a'focks his name?
McCarney: Oh yes, Meat Loaf.  Me daughters love the man.  I really do not get the appeal.
O'Ronan: Focks man, you are trying to get me to drink with youse real bad!  Make me thankful that I do not have to deal with teenage girls either!
McCarney gives him a playful slap.
McCarney: Well come on old chap, make my day!
O'Ronan gives him a funny look.
O'Ronan: I feel like I heard that one before, but I can't quite place it.
McCarney looks confused.
McCarney: No mate, I totally made that one up just now.  Never been used in the history of cinema.  But it wouldn't surprise me if some American dude said it.
O'Ronan: Yes, look at us now.  Couple of Leeds boys talking like we're Clint Eastwood or some other big shot American cowboy.  You got it Georgie my boy, to the tavern!
McCarney and O'Ronan both head towards a light blue four door Beetle, driving off into the night.  O'Ronan's niece runs off after him.
Shannon: DAMN YOU UNCLE DAVE!  COME BACK!  THE RALLY IS NOT OVER YET!  FOCKING HELL!!!!
She starts kicking a trashcan that is nearby before sitting down on a nearby bench, putting her face into her hands.
Shannon: This cannot be happening right!  Arrrrrrgh!
Sharon shows up, looking very confused.
Sharon: Hey kid, where'd your uncle run off to?
Shannon looks up at her with a face of insanity.
Shannon: Ugh, I don't know!  I don't know!  He just got with Ole Georgie and the two decided to just get shitfaced because I don't know fock this rally?
Sharon: The freaking bastard!  What is it with your men and their drinks anyway?  Do they not care at all about pleasing their women!?
Shannon: Whyse it all got to be about sex with you, Sharon?  Can youse just enjoy a man's company?
Sharon laughs.
Sharon: For your information missus, I love your uncle.  I love him despite his extremely out of shape physique and his almost daily rum and coke habit!  I just wish that for once, he was there during it!  Is that too much to ask?
Shannon: Hey, don't look at me.  I'm just a girl.  You can't be saying these things around me virgin ears.  Besides, I have to meet my boy Jack in about twenty minutes anyway.
Sharon looks at her shocked.
Sharon: What the bleeding hell are you kids doing at 10:30 at night?!
Shannon looks at her, all innocent.
Shannon: Oh, I just have to help him with pants, err I mean his math.
Sharon gives her a very sarcastic look.
Sharon: Uhhuh, right!  Hey Bob!
Robert "Bob" Commons, the Labour coordinator for Leeds West, looks at her.
Commons: Yes?
Sharon: Where is the nearest tavern?
Commons: Just right over there.
Sharon laughs.
Sharon: Bleeding idiots!  They got into that Beetle. . . . . for that!?

[Mechaman]

Back at the Gannon residence
About thirty minutes later:

News TV: And now we go back to Leeds West to hear the post rally interview with the candidate, David O'Ronan.
Herbert: What the bloody hell is it with this O'Ronan character?  What makes him so big anyway?
Art looks at his dad and back at the tv.
Arthur: Well dad, the inside word is that O'Ronan is being considered as a viable alternative to Atkinson for the position of Party Treasurer.
Herbert looks shocked.
Herbert: You got to be joking!  I mean, that lad has only been in office for what, four years? Oh the rush and excitement for inexperienced men!
Arthur: Maybe dad, but Dave O'Ronan has a certain charisma with the Labour voting public as well as some strong connections with the head unions and.  . . . where is he?
The tv shows an empty podium in front of a very bright light.
TV: Ugh, maybe the candidate is a little late.
From the left of the screen a light brunette haired girl, perhaps in her late teens or early twenties (she looked fairly mature to be a teenager, but there was something about her that indicated the inexperience of youth) in a brown leather jacket and blue jeans takes the podium.
Quite lovely too, a dark and secret voice said in his head.
She begins to speak in a voice that could only be described as thoroughly Leeds.
Shannon O'Ronan: Ladies and gentlemen, my uncle had a personal emergency to deal with.  He apologizes for his absence from this rally.  He would like to thank you all for all of your hard work and wishes you well in the coming years.  Thank you for your time.
Reporter: Miss O'Ronan!  You said your uncle had an emergency!?  What of it?
The young woman on the stage throws her hands in the air very combatively.
Shannon: I don't bloody know!  He just said it was an emergency!
Arthur Gannon laughs.
Art: Crazy girl is lying through her teeth!
Selicia: You think?
Art, who had a brief career as a barrister, recognized all the signs.
Art: Her nervous body language, the rapid closing and opening of the eyes, and her strong outburst, all classic signs of a lie.
Shannon: (in response to a reporter who asked a question not heard by the Gannons) Look, I am just the man's niece, alright?  He don't feel me with all the bloody party information!  If me uncle said it's an emergency, it's an emergency!  OKay damn it!
She shoves the mic down on the podium and walks off.
The room laughs very hard.
Selicia: Well, let us hope that uncle is not like niece.
Art, who was experiencing some very complicated and dare I say impolite feelings, just mutters.
Art: Yeah, let us hope not.
Selicia looks over at him.  Art quickly closes off all emotion to his face to avoid an uncomfortable confrontation.  Selicia looks pleased.
phew, very close one.
Selicia: Lot of confidence we should have in Labour.  One of their men wins an election, doesn't even bother to show up to his own interview!  The audacity!
Herbert fills his cup with some Brandy.
Herbert: Well, I guess we all can kiss Treasurer O'Ronan goodbye.

End of Prologue

[Mechaman]

Act I: Hell Hath No Fury

Two Days Later
The Daily Telegraph
"Where was O'Ronan?"

Article has a picture of O'Ronan at the rally next to a picture of the empty podium after O'Ronan had left.

After a very strong re-election victory, Dave O'Ronan shocked many political observers when he decided to skip the candidate interview in favor of a drink at the local watering hole in Leeds West.

Oh, our bad, we mean that he had "an emergency".  An emergency urge to have a few rum and cokes (his favorite) while his 17 year old niece, poor poor poor Shannon O'Ronan, took to the stage and an expletive fueled rage told journalists that her uncle "had an emergency".

Yes, this was the man that Leeds West re-elected into office with an over 10,000 vote margin and who until two nights ago was talked up in secret Labour leadership talks as the possible successor to Norman Atkinson to the position of Treasurer of the Labour Party.  The same man who had only minutes earlier aroused the crowd into a flaming passion with hopes for a better future for a much divided and shellacked party in the wake of the recent elections.

So seriously, Dave, what the hell were you thinking?  Did you at all think about the thousands of people in your constituency who had voted you in by large margins, both four years ago and a couple of days ago, when you decided to go out and get your wet on?  Did you think about the kind of impression that Labour leadership would be left with when their future Golden Boy put his hopeful night of passion with a young barmaid in front of the political futures of his party?

It is attitudes like these that have resulted in the destruction of the modern Labour Party in favor of Thatcher's Conservatives.  Already the trade unionists and other big forces in the party are calling for O'Ronan's head.  A shame for a man who just a couple of months ago was widely heralded as the future of the Labour Party and one of the figures of the party to reach out to the young of this generation.

Well Dave, just remember, Hell Hath No Fury.

[Blair]

IS Gannon the leader of the conservatives?

[Mechaman]

IS Gannon the leader of the conservatives?

No he is a freshman MP, elected in the Thatcher wave.

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

Is Gannon Euro-skeptic, or the opposite?

I've spent the past few minutes trying to find the Wikipedia article for a certain socially conservative, Euro-skeptic MP from that era who might prove a good foil to Gannon. I recall it being a relatively short article, so all the major names linked to in relation to the Poll Tax and leadership elections don't seem to be turning him up, though I do recall this character did run in like 1990 or something like that.

[Mechaman]

Gannon's London Apartment
May 5th, 1979:

Arthur and Selicia Gannon are settling into their new London apartment while unpacking some of Arthur's things from their old residence.  Due to a concern about his image among common people, Arthur Gannon refused assistance from his father to send some of the house staff to help them move.  Instead, he and his friend Eric Langshaer, who introduced Selicia to him a few years back, were doing the heavy lifting.  On his way up to his apartment he had successfully introduced himself to maybe half a dozen people, even getting some telephone numbers so that he and his wife could have some people to do things with outside of the high life crowd.
He could not wait to get started.
Sitting down behind his personal desk to get a moment of rest, his wife laughed at him, holding her belly.
Selicia: Not used to working with your hands?
Arthur laughs.
Gannon: Yeah you could say that again!  Just think, ten more days till Parliament convenes!  That means we have ten days to do whatever we like, right here in London!
Selicia beams.  Call her a stupid stereotypical American or what have you, but she loved London and enjoyed the many things the city had to offer.
Gannon pulls out a dusted over picture of his grandfather, Theodore Jenks Gannon, and blows the dust off of it (or he at least tries to, there was like an armor of dust on it), settling it on the desk.  The profile on the photo was that of a modest looking man with a distinct looking moustache, carefully prepared jet black hair, and in one of Talley's finest suit jackets.
Theodore Jenks Gannon, himself a longtime Tory politician (the former Mayor of London at one point), was a figure greatly admired by the younger Gannon.  "Grandpa Ted", as he was affectionately known, had instilled in both his boy and his grandboys the importance of duty and service to the public from a very young age.  He had passed away when Art as just a young boy of 9, far too soon and with much more to be learned.
Gannon put his feet up on his desk, something that his affluent parents would demean as "uncouth" and give him a good talking to (if not licking) for having such audacity.  But right now?  In this new and dare he say sweet new "pad"?  Hell yeah let's kick back.
He turns on the tv to an episode of Fawlty Towers.
Selicia: Oh not this show again.  I don't get you Brits and your humor.
He turns towards her, noting.
Gannon: For the record, it is "humour".  With a "u", thank very much please.
Selicia: I'm sorry but this guy just seems like a real asshole.  What is his problem?
Gannon: Well you see my dear, that is part of the humour.  Again, with a "u" for emphasis so that it rolls off of ze tongue.
Selicia laughs as she comes over and parks herself on Gannon's lap.
Selicia: You're insufferable, you know that?
Gannon pecks her and moves his arms around her big pregnant belly.
Gannon: Umm, mi Corazon!  You are making me feel like such a big boy!
Selicia gives him a disgusted look.
Selicia: My gosh, is all you ever think about is sex?  We don't have much longer to do this, ya know?
Gannon starts doing some naughty things that can't be described here with his right hand and then playfully bites his wife's ear.
Gannon: What can I say?  The fatter the cushion. .  .  . . .. oh yeah.
She gets off of him and starts walking toward their small as hell bedroom (Arthur just had to move into one of the cheaper apartments, to show that he was committed to a consistent theme of fiscal conservatism as well as to make him appeal to the common man), taking off her bits of clothing.  Like a starving dog, Gannon runs after her, so excited that he practically jumps through the door and closes it behind him.

[End Sexy Discretion Shot Scene]

Thirty Minutes later
The Bedroom:

Gannon is laying in bed with his pregnant wife, who he just did the nasty nasty with.
Boy you got issues, you guys keep doing it much longer your kid might end up awfully confused.
He turns over to his wife.
Gannon: Was that good for you?
Selicia: It was okay.  So, what do you think about the Chambers coming over this week?
Damn it woman, let us access my athletic ability and stamina first before we go over the minutia of who is coming over or what have you.
Gannon: Umm fine, okay.
Selicia: Damn it Art, are you even listening?  I talked to you about this a week ago!
Details, details.  Here's to hoping that whoever is in there takes more after the dad.  Not to throw in a self-endorsement deal in there or anything.
Gannon: Right yes, the Chambers.  Let them in got it.
Selicia: Look, I know you and Melissa don't get along just real well.
Melissa Chambers was Selicia's childhood friend who somehow ended up connecting up with her in London in graduate school.  She was also one of the most shrill and irritating people he had ever met.  A liberal American Democrat, she always comes into a room assuming that everything she thinks is right and what everyone else thinks is wrong.  Mention that you think that taxes should be lowered on rich people or that maybe some anti-abortion people make good points and be prepared to hear a scathing damnation of any and everybody who agrees with those viewpoints.
And she didn't even look really attractive either.  She looked like a freaking librarian.  No, not like the Sexy Librarian in some of those illicit movies you can rent from those x-rated stores.  I mean an actual librarian.
And she is what?  28 years old?  Dear father, please spare us all from that kind of sad fate.
Her husband was Daniel Chambers.  There wasn't really anything despicable about the man.  If anything he seemed to be one of the most pitiful creatures on this green earth.  Weak willed, stammering, rail thin (it would shock Gannon if the man was over 110 lbs), and with a creepy large pair of glasses he seemed to be the perfect counterpart for Beezlebub in the flesh.  Daniel and Melissa had met and married back in the states when the both met at Duke University.  It was quite easy to see who wore the pants in the relationship. I'll give you a hint: NOT FREAKING DANIEL.
Dinner conversations with those two almost always were guaranteed to turn out awkward.  Because dear lord, where to begin?  Let's just hope that Melissa doesn't start talking about Ted Kennedy again.  I mean really, you would think she was married to the guy or something.
Gannon: What gave it away, my dear?
Selicia: I really don't appreciate your sarcasm.  Melissa is a very good friend of mine.
Gannon: I just do not understand it Selicia.  I mean, weren't you a Republican back in the states?
Selicia: Well yeah but-
Gannon: Well then how the hell did you put up with someone who thought you were Satan Incarnate?
Selicia: Well, her politics developed a little later in life.  Like, after we moved apart and before we both ended up here.  Before then she was a bit more bearable on politics.
Gannon: I'm sorry, it's just that she just seems so rude, so overbearing, and I wonder how Daniel gets himself into bed with that. .  . . . . creature.
Selicia laughs.
Selicia: Well obviously, he takes the pants off!
Both of them laugh very very hard.
Selicia: No kidding!  Explains a lot!
Selicia leans her head against Gannon's shoulder in an uncontrollable fit of laughter. 
Gannon: Well, look like we're off to a right good start here, aren't we?  Strong mandate at the polls, decisive Conservative victory, me in London.
Selicia: Do you always have to bring politics into this?
Gannon: I am a public servant now.  It is part of my nature.
Selicia: Just seems so silly.  There are like 700 other people-
Gannon: 649 others.
Selicia: Okay, 649 others.  Let them worry about politics.
Gannon: It's just right now we got so much promise.  I hope it is not all wasted away this time.  We had to fight like hell to get the rates lowered to 78%.  I don't want to be pessimistic, but Labour seems too unyielding to make progress possible.  "That's too expensive?  Well just nationalize it good old chap?  Nationalize this, nationalize that, nationalize nationalize nationalize."  I hope your bloody liberal friends like that.
Selicia chuckles.
Selicia: Having the ability to advocate for nationalization without being called a Communist?  Oh sure they would.  They all expect everything to be free.
Gannon: Life is not about getting things for free, sadly.  Everything has a cost and everything has an expenditure.
Selicia: You know, all of this talk about fiscal responsibility?  Yeah it's not doing it for me.  Just saying.
Gannon gives out a sigh of disgust.
Gannon: Sheesh!  Is sex the only thing you think about!?

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

I see that Gannon is obviously the "good guy" in this story, though I worry if his wife's remarks that his performance was "okay" do not bode well for either his faculties, his marriage, or both.

[Mechaman]

The O'Ronan Residence
Leeds West
Around the same time

O'Ronan: Well bleedin me folks!  I didn't realize that forgetting an interview was a cardinal sin!
In the residence there was his niece Shannon preparing some tea for the two visitors.  Although it is customary for the blokes at the meeting to share tea, her uncle was staunchly proud of his drink.  Even with the Denis Healeys and Stanley Cohens of the world.
Healey: Dear god man, you have any idea how ignorant you made us look?  Come on Dave, at least issue a state of apology.  Blame it on our losses and then move on!  Don't resort to marching to the beat of your own drummer like you usually do!
Dave really could not stand the bastard, but he did have a point.
Healey: And please none of this drivel about sticking it to the establishment press this time like you did a few months ago.  I realize that courting the Bennites is a core of your appeal but please do not get ahead of yourself.
O'Ronan laughed hard.
O'Ronan: Getting ahead of meself?  You are the wanker who went all out with the whole "future of the party" shite.  Me?  I just did what I always did, which is just make really good on the fly speeches to the necessary unions and their sponsors while also making occasional reasonable outbursts against conservative propaganda.  I am not marching to any drummer, I'm trying to do my job Denis.  You expect me to pick a side between you and Tony Benn you can forget it.  I am interested solely in the service of the people of Leeds West.
Cohen: But surely a little unity would help a little at least?  It looks very weird when we have one man in the western constituency occasionally going off the marching line.  It sends a message to the opposition that we are divided.
O'Ronan: Oh sod off!  WE all know that post interview mess is a joke anyway.  Nobody is making a big deal about it except for the Conservative dominated media looking for some wounded sharks to spear in the wake of their great victory!  Besides, it's not like they were really announcing that it was going on.
Shannon snickers.
O'Ronan: I mean I thought it was optional!  Nobody told me that it was an actual interview.  They told me it was a meet and greet with other MPs man!  Sounded optional as hell!  After the night we had why shouldn't I have a drink!?  And that shit about that barmaid?  Fockin lies man!  I never put a hand on her!  If you want further proof of desperate right wing tactics, then just look at the page where they imply I left the rally to put my hand up some sally's skirt!  I mean what lies I can't believe they are spouting that shit out loud!
Cohen: Well you are a single MP at a bar.  You forget that not everyone knows about you and Sharon Kowalski.  As it is, you are lucky that those who do know aren't making a too big of a deal about it.  She is your secretary after all-
O'Ronan: How many men would be kicked out of Parliament if there was a serious rule against that sort a'thing?  I mean come on, women in the workplace!  It ought to be an occupational hazard!  I'd have to be a total bum boy not to jump on that mates!
Healey clears his throat.
Healey: Miss, the tea is well.  But would you mind pouring me and good sir Cohen over here a couple of whiskeys?  Mood is getting a bit terse I am afraid.
Shannon laughs as she goes over to the drink cabinet and mixes them a couple of drinks.
Shannon: No Mr. Healey.  I am afraid that dear Uncle here has always been a very animated type.  Anyway, you think he's animated now?  Wait till you see me dad's face when he sees what remains of his liquor cabinet.... . .  uncle.
O'Ronan laughs.
O'Ronan: That fockin' choir boy?  I swear on our connected mother's grave that the supply that was here when I came over was the same supply I saw hence four months earlier!  I am doing him a favor you know?  Uptight church goer that 'ee is!
Shannon: See what I mean?
Cohen: I think you got a serious problem Dave boy.
Healey: Yes and it is beginning to cost us, as you have probably heard by now.
O'Ronan gets up in a quick fury.
O'Ronan: O'fuck off Denis!  There is a lot more fuckin' wrong with this party than some fuckin random MP from Leeds fuckin West getting sodded on the night of his party's biggest defeat in decades instead of hosting an interview with that sham of a newspaper!  Lay off me and go back to tending your own wounds.  You obviously have many considering what happened last night I say.  And frankly, I see a lot more vindication for the activists in this party than any support for how leadership has handled the last few years.  I say it is time for new leadership and a new direction and I won't give these wankers the satisfaction of seeing me grovel in humility to satisfy the vain egos of the hierarchy!
Healey looks dumbstruck at what O'Ronan just yelled at him.
Healey: Perhaps your niece is right O'Ronan.  You got problems and issues.  You best sort out your substance issues before it comes out to bite you in a wrong way down the road.
Cohen: Yeah, and it might be a good idea to replace that secretary of yours.  Whether that means marrying her or "shacking up" like many of today's world are doing I leave up to you.  Hell, leave her if you have to!  You are quickly turning into a crude stereotype and I don't like it.
O'Ronan calms down.
O'Ronan: I'm sorry I yelled.  Lookit, I am not an alcoholic I just drink a lot-
Healey: Explain that to the public who are wondering where in the world you would otherwise be called off to at that time of night!  I mean damn it man!  Get your shit together!  In the meantime, I expect your prepared apology to be delivered effective tomorrow evening at 7.  I mean dear lord Dave, I hate to see such promising young talent like yourself waste away behind a bottle.  Get this addressed good sir.  We both want to see you advance through the party ranks.  Lord knows this country needs more Leeds men at the forefront.
Cohen looks at his watch.
Cohen: Denis, the meet!
Healey looks at Cohen and nods.  The two men stand up as does Dave O'Ronan.
Healey: Well, we got a meet with one of the local unions in about oh ten minutes!  You take care of yourself Dave.
Healey shakes his hand, as does Cohen.  O'Ronan watches them walk out the door.

(outside the door)

Healey: Stanley, what alternatives do we have to O'Ronan in the next election?
Cohen: Denis, come on the man obviously has a little bit of an issue-
Healey: The last thing I want is a goddamn Benn supporter in our backyard!
Cohen: He's been drinking all day.  Give the man a break.  He's likely come to his senses now.  Besides, we just had an election!  Isn't it a little too early to be planning this sort of thing-
Healey: I wonder what John Silversmith has planned.  Could use a friendly trade unionist in Parliament.  Hmm, maybe it is something to think about.  But my god we need to keep a lid on O'Ronan!  God forbid he opens his mouth on that one troubling issue what it will do to us!  Alcohol is one thing, but that!  I shudder to think of the kind of slaughter the Conservatives would wage on us!
Cohen: Well, this is convenient.  Man's brother lives across the street from the local dive and the union shop.  Saves us from the gas crisis at least.
Healey: Tell me about it.. . . . .

[Dr. Cynic]

The first constituency surgery you write should be a hell of a lot of fun.