Update XXII: Cleaning Up the Meat at [redacted].

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

You have valid arguments, but until you spend an entire week walking step-by-step with me, you cannot judge me as being lazy or incompetent or intentionally throwing away a golden opportunity anything of the like.

You literally can not physically handle spending an entire week walking step-by-step with any of us, and that's the problem.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Reading this makes me wonder how people can make fun of playing Ingress.

THIS THREAD IS NOT ABOUT YOU

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Why do I keep imagining Bushie setting up a lawn chair in the middle of the meat department after an unbearably long 45 minutes of sitting, fanning himself with a sales circular as sweat drips off?

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Bushie will be working at a Whole Foods competitor. My guess is that he winds up buying exactly $0.00 worth of groceries at work a week. Which is probably for the best, it's an pretty expensive store.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

That freezer is so cold it could kill you pretty easy, so you have to know what you're looking for and kind of know where it is.

Grim foreshadowing, Bushie.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

10 an hour isn't that much. Any emergency can seriously hurt you, like car problems or medical. You don't have much room for error at all and it can be hard to build up a emergency fund.

Further consider that all of Bushie's day-to-day expenses, including rent, food, his new iPhone 6 Plus, unlimited calling plan, student loans and super deluxe cable package are footed by Papa Bushie. Anything he makes at [redacted] is thus "fun money," and will indeed go a long way toward improving Bushie's already lush unemployment lifestyle.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

As was stated before $10 an hour is not enough to cover all my expenses no matter how frugal I am.

You're hanging onto the super-duper Cox cable package though, right?

Even reducing that won't bring me into a surplus.

So I guess there's no point reducing it at all then.  Makes perfect sense.

You gotta waste money to make money.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

I would assume Bushie is getting a big tax refund because, when employed, taxes were taken out of his check under the assumption that he'd have the job all twelve months.

Bushie should qualify for a small EITC, but will otherwise get most if not all the income tax withheld by his employer refunded to him. After all, you pay a 0% tax rate on your first $6200 of income or so thanks to the standard deduction.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

I eat plenty of ground beef and I'm in terrific shape. Ground beef is a pretty good food choice so long as Bushie gets a decent enough grade, and IIRC his family usually chooses the lean 85 blend. (I prefer 90/10 for my burgers, but a lot of people use 70 -- ugh.) Besides, hamburger meat is always going to be healthier for you when you make from scratch at home.

Bushie's problem is sugar, not meat. Bushie needs more protein and less sugar. Fewer bowls of Trix, they're not helping.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

I understand the implications and dangers of high cholesterol.

No, you don't.

I know I've got to make a change, a real bonafide change.

No, you don't.

I'm going to try,

No, you won't.

... but I won't post my food choices on the forum that way I don't get clubbed by the forum and I don't lash out in anger and falsely accuse.

OK, meet you back here next week when you're seeking praise for gaining and losing the same 3 pounds again. Enjoy the nachos.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Bushie, weren't you proudly taking a multivitamin that wasn't prescription strength? What happened to that?

It's like literally any little thing that could improve his health he simply will not do.  Bewildering.

I've been taking them, but my doctor said I needed to take them with a full stomach, otherwise they just pass through.  I've just been taking them with my morning medicine regardless of whether I've had food or not.

So Morning Nachos then?

Pizza in the morning

Pizza in the evening

Pizza at suppertime

When pizza's on a bagel

You can eat pizza anytime

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Good times are happening and more good times are ahead.

Uh oh, isn't this usually the part where things start going horribly wrong?

I found something today in the meat department that I want to try one of these days.  It is their Bacon-Cheddar Chicken Breast.

Even by your definition of "diet"...

Honestly, Bushie could do a whole heck of a lot worse than bacon-cheddar chicken breast. It's a huge net improvement over the usual because it has ~0 carbs in it.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Good times are happening and more good times are ahead.

Uh oh, isn't this usually the part where things start going horribly wrong?

I found something today in the meat department that I want to try one of these days.  It is their Bacon-Cheddar Chicken Breast.

Even by your definition of "diet"...

Honestly, Bushie could do a whole heck of a lot worse than bacon-cheddar chicken breast. It's a huge net improvement over the usual because it has ~0 carbs in it.

Is that so?  Are there real differences between types of carbs that the simple nutrition label will not tell you? 

Carbs are carbs, all of them spike your insulin levels and cause you to retain fat. Whole grains spike it to a lesser extent than say, wonder bread, but it still does it. Carbs are fine for most people, but if you're Bushie's weight, if he ever wants to drop the pounds, he needs to stop eating bread. Cutting out a lot of fat won't do him a lot of good if he's still eating bread, pastas, burritos.

That's why fruit juices and the like are shams, because they're actually not that good for you. Some fruit is like berries, but others are just pure sugar, but people feel good about eating it because they're eating fruit and they've been told it's healthy.

These days I just splash some fruit juice in the water for a little flavor.  8 oz of a cranberry juice has 36g of sugar.  It's insane.  I do smoothies now for my fruits.

There are times, of course, when you want fast-acting carbohydrates -- they're an important part of recovery post-workout. I eat a 40% carbs, 30% protein, 30% fat mix because that's the ratio my body responds best to when it comes to gaining muscle and losing fat. But it's important to time your intake properly. Because carbs become energy quickly, you want to eat them close to the beginning of your day (oatmeal is great, recently I've been making a whole-grain pancake with breakfast) and after extensive exercise to bring the body's natural store of energy back to normal.

I avoid products with added sugar entirely (like "fruit juice"!), because sugar turns into energy so quick you can get high off it (as our favorite junkie Bushie does). Natural sugars like those in fruit are far better for you because they come in a complete package with fiber, which helps slow their digestion.

The nasty secret no one wants to tell you is fat is okay for your body. It's processed sugars and carbohydrates that make you fat. "Low fat" is just a marketing lie fed to you by the powers that be.

This is a hugely important point. Fat intake is very necessary for the proper function of your body, and number of fats are very good for you. I shed a lot of body fat last year when I upped my fat intake to that 40/30/30 ratio.

My fitness-oriented friends and I swear by coconut oil.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Protip: Fiber is what makes productive dumps. The more fiber, the better. Let's roll!

Think of the weight-loss implications! All the fat will get pooped right out!

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Sadly, it hasn't yet.

Nor will it ever, of course.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

How many times a week to you plan to eat fast food drive thru while working at a grocery store?

What kind of question is that?

Yikes, that many times?

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Bushie have you been eating at Sprouts during your lunch break or are you driving to get food?

I actually haven't had anything at lunch except a swig from the water fountain.  I only get 30 minutes for lunch and I want to be off my feet as much as possible during that short break.  I will probably end up bringing my lunch, or I may just get lunch after I get home if I work the early, early shift like I will to start the month of April (4:00-12:30).  I don't really feel like eating a turkey wrap at 8:00 am which would be my meal break, so I may just get a bowl of cereal before I leave for work and then wait to eat until I get home.  It will really be on a day-by-day basis.  I probably won't do the same thing each day because of the variety of shifts I can work.

While it's well known skipping breakfast is bad for one's health, skipping lunch isn't good either.  It slows down your metabolism during the times when your body could be burning the most (active in the daytime) due to 10 hours or so between meals.   You should ideally snack on mixed nuts during your job and have a small lunch packed with protein and veggies but few carbs.  Eating 2 meals a day just kills your metabolism.

I'm not purposely trying to skip meals.  I am just trying to figure out the best way to work my meal break.  I am not going to have a turkey wrap at an 8:00 am lunch break.  I want a biscuit and eggs or something at that time of the morning, not a turkey wrap.  It may take me some time, but I'm trying to find a good routine for lunch and then throw that routine out the window because of the changing shifts.

I don't understand where this "turkey wrap" bit came from. Are you really so helpless that you can't figure out something else to eat for a 8AM break than a turkey wrap?

Buy a damn microwaveable egg-on-a-biscuit sandwich. Or a banana. You being unable to find a suitable breakfast meal while working at a supermarket makes me want to scream.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

The meat has been all cleaned up. RIP.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Let's just hope this expensive new standing gear from Walmart gets more use than the expensive new walking gear from Walmart Bushie once bough.

Considering they'll be in my shoes, then they should get more use.

Just not in use on the floor of [Redacted] 

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

I'm afraid that Jeff's refusal to do the bare minimum to prepare his body or even respond to my suggestion that he try to go walking in new or interesting locations doesn't bode well for his prospects. This will play out as it always has: smug overconfidence before the job, excuses and ignorance while on the job, realization of what should have been done only after the job is gone.

Anyone care to predict a Bushie post from a month from now?

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Oh man, this is only about one week off

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Apparently Update XXIII is taking place on another forum:

http://www.politicalforum.com/new-member-introductions/404070-hello.html

Thats just low

edit: Woah that forum is huge.....how awful

BUSHIE

You have already infected this forum with your narcissistic madness, do not infect another.

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no Johnny no

you don't know what you're starting Johnny

don't ask him about himself

he'll tell you

you'll get involved

and eventually your involvement will destroy you

and your forum

just as our forum has been destroyed and left bare

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Bushie's new job doesn't offer him ACA-qualified health insurance.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

Bushie's new job doesn't offer him ACA-qualified health insurance.

"Thank the Lord some employers are still brave enough to stand up to Barry Sotero's socialist obummercare!! Just trust in God, He will provide you with all the health insurance you need! Praying for you!" - Bushie's facebook friends upon hearing this news

(luckily he's got the free healthcare from the Indian medicine man)

Bushie's free healthcare has of course already been established in his first 10 posts.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

You realize bizzaro Atlas is the underworld and we just opened up a portal to them and now we will be invaded.  We solved the proverbial rubix cube.  Pinhead has arrived.

I find a comparison to Fringe to be more apt. Now that Bushie has selfishly opened a portal to "over there," both our worlds are destined to collapse. Our only hope is that the "over there" version of Bushie turns out to be an incredibly well-adjusted, successful, science-minded savior who can save us all.

[Small Business Owner of Any Repute]

This is like a black hole, I've spend the last 2 hours reading this. It's fine line between being extremely funny, and extremely depressing.

What's the history with Bushie?

There are 21 other Update threads where you can read the entire history.

I don't have that much free time!

You'll make time for it. How else are you going to learn about his adopted kids from Kenya, the time he tried selling us all insurance and got de-modded, side jacking, the train room, his love affair with Allison, the time Update saved him from prison, and -- of course -- the time he lost a whole ton of weight but it all turned out to just be a lie.