Update for Everyone IV - Hungover

[DC Al Fine]

My wife is pregnant. Did you know you can still be surprised at the news even if you are actively trying to have a baby?

[DC Al Fine]

Thanks everyone

Congratulations, that's wonderful! Do you know how far along she is?

We're not sure actually. We have an appointment to confirm that and the due date in a few weeks.

[DC Al Fine]

A word of advice to the single over thinking types:

There are two unfortunate facts of life that make it important to make a decision quickly or move on:

1) As Cassius noted, it's very difficult to change an established relationship
2) Some women are happy to get comfort from a male friend without any of the sacrifice that comes with a relationship.

Ask girls out quickly. If you wait a long time and she's interested, she'll be frustrated and might move on while you work up your courage. If you wait and she's not interested, you're only prolonging the inevitable and wasting time that could be spent pursuing girls who actually like you.

[DC Al Fine]

in this thread: nice guys

I hope you're not referring to me here. You know I'm the first to call out Nice Guys on their crap.

Speaking of, there's quite a bit of implications in DC's post I really don't like, first off it the idea that there's anything wrong with a girl appreciating emotional support but not wanting a relationship.

If you want to be a shoulder to cry on for a female friend, more power to you.

There's nothing wrong with it per se, but if your aim is to find a long term relationship, showering emotional support and spending lots of time with someone you'll never date is counterproductive.

[DC Al Fine]

in this thread: nice guys

I hope you're not referring to me here. You know I'm the first to call out Nice Guys on their crap.

Speaking of, there's quite a bit of implications in DC's post I really don't like, first off it the idea that there's anything wrong with a girl appreciating emotional support but not wanting a relationship.

If you want to be a shoulder to cry on for a female friend, more power to you.

There's nothing wrong with it per se, but if your aim is to find a long term relationship, showering emotional support and spending lots of time with someone you'll never date is counterproductive.

Well, yeah, some of us happen to enjoy friendships with girls for themselves and not for ulterior motives. Is that really so baffling?

No.

I think you are being a bit obtuse here. R2D2 specifically expressed frustration about a girl that he is interested in, that he spends time with, but doesn't appear to want to be in a relationship with him. I noted in my advice that this is a common pitfall for guys who are looking for girlfriends. There's no contradiction here.

Put another way, if I tell someone to cut out the junk food to lose weight, it would be dumb to jump in to talk about how I just don't understand why people like french fries and chicken wings.

[DC Al Fine]

My friends dragged me to a bowling alley/nightclub last night, where a couple who were bowling in a two-piece suit and a party dress were snobbish to me for not wearing custom-made clothes.

what

I asked my friends if we could please go to a normal, middle-to-working-class bowling alley next time and they agreed with me.

Incidentally, in your reply, did you indicate indignation that someone who was going bowling should be classist?

Yes, very much so.

That's the best part of the story.

I mean it'd be bad if someone treated you like that at the country club, but the fact that someone actually acted like that at a bowling alley is just surreal.

[DC Al Fine]

That sounds like it will end poorly for the Brazilian.

At least you won't be around for when he inevitably pisses off the real drug dealers.

[DC Al Fine]

I wrote my final CPA exams this week

[DC Al Fine]

I'll probably regret posting this...

My ex contacted me and seems very keen on reestablishing contact. My gut reaction is to run away.

Your gut reaction is right.

[DC Al Fine]

CPA exams are all done. Work is slow, and the wife doesn't need a lot of help with baby stuff yet. I've got a surplus of free time for the first time since high school, and I'm bored

I need a new project to keep me busy. Any ideas?

[DC Al Fine]

I've been feeling increasingly intrusive suicidal urges over the past few weeks, to the point where it's currently near-constant. I wonder if that's the sort of thing a meds adjustment could fix. It probably is, but my prescriber is hours away.

That's a common side-effect to some medications, including certain anti-depressants.  Whatever the reason, I do hope you see your doctor or prescriber as soon as you can.

Wow. That's an exceedingly bad side effect of medication for a depressed person.

[DC Al Fine]

A girl in one of my TA groups appears, in my opinion, to have the hots for me. Granted I'm terrible at gauging this stuff. It's weird 😐

As a former TA, trust me. Ladies dig the sweet sweet TA authority

[DC Al Fine]

Heard the baby's heartbeat a few days ago, so there's definitely a little person living in there

[DC Al Fine]

I passed my last CPA exam. Done school for the foreseeable future.