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Author Topic: Satirical Political Beliefs Test  (Read 803 times)
Јas
Jas
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« on: June 01, 2005, 08:29:51 am »
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http://www.geocities.com/donaldjhagen/humoroustest.html

Don't know if anyone flagged this before, but here it is anyway. 178 questions which should help you find your place on the political spectrum and/or something to enjoy.
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Funny 'cause it's true:
Very few people seriously allow facts to affect their opinions.

DanielX
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E: 2.45, S: -4.70

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« Reply #1 on: June 01, 2005, 09:40:47 am »
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My results:
CONS 51 (28.5%)
LIBL 5 (2.8%)
LBRT 122 (68.2%)
COMM 1 (0.6%)

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Yankee Capitalist Scum!
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Lewis Trondheim
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« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2005, 09:59:26 am »
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No time to complete this now, but after twenty questions I'm at
Liberal 8
Communist 7
Libertarian 4
Conservative 1, on cloning, and I hope I remain at 1. Tongue

EDIT: (to 40, gotta run now)
Liberal 15
Communist 15
Libertarian 8
Conservative 2
« Last Edit: June 01, 2005, 10:09:48 am by R.P. McLewis Trondheim »Logged

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Richard
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E: 8.40, S: 2.80

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« Reply #3 on: June 01, 2005, 10:20:54 am »
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108: What should be the minimum requirement for getting a high school diploma?

Conservatives:
-  4 years English Literature
-  4 years Latin
-  Biology, Chemistry, and Physics
-  Algebra, Geometry, Algebra II, and Pre-calculus
-  4 years History
-  1 year Western Civilization
-  1 year Basic Economics
-  1 year Marksmanship and Firearms Safety.

Libruhls:
-  Able to read at a 6th grade level 
-  Able to write well enough to fill out a job application
-  Able to add and subtract well enough to balance a checkbook (with the aid of a pocket calculator).
-  1 year Eastern Civilization
-  4 years Health, Hygiene and Human Sexual Practices


Libertarians:
-  Getting passing grades on all your classes.

Commies:
-  Perfect conduct



HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Јas
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« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2005, 11:55:01 am »
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For the record:
LIBL: 85
LBRT: 59
CONS: 18
COMM: 16
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Funny 'cause it's true:
Very few people seriously allow facts to affect their opinions.

MaC
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« Reply #5 on: June 01, 2005, 12:51:25 pm »
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love this one, I got pretty much all libertarian answers except for about 20 conservative and three liberal.
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Faster than a legally fired bullet.
More powerful than railroaded legislation.
Able to leap giant bureaucracy in a single bound.

It's an anarchist.  It's a free marketer.

It's... It's...        Super Libertarian
○∙◄☻tπ[╪AV┼cV└
jfern
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« Reply #6 on: June 01, 2005, 02:47:22 pm »
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Holy sh**t some of the questions are biased like #158.

Conservative: 10
Liberal: 107
Libertarian: 47
Communist: 15
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CARLHAYDEN
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« Reply #7 on: June 01, 2005, 03:03:20 pm »
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I love it!

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Registered in Arizona for Fantasy election purposes.
Grad Students are the Worst
Alcon
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« Reply #8 on: June 01, 2005, 03:10:03 pm »

Haha! This is great. Some of my favourites:

11: Endangered spotted owls are spotted nesting in New York City's Central Park.  Do you...
CONS: Call for an immediate return for to unfettered logging in the Pacific Northwest.

15: What extremist groups have you joined?
CONS: The Chamber of Commerce

16: A cup with that only contains half a cup of water is...
LBRT: an example of shortages caused by government control of our water supply.

19: Cloning human beings..
LIBL: must be outlawed.  The only permissible nontraditional ways to produce offspring are in vitro fertilization, hiring a surrogate mother, and wife swapping.

Genius.
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n/c
Gabu
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E: -4.32, S: -6.52

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« Reply #9 on: June 01, 2005, 03:17:28 pm »
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My favorites, updated as I go along:

24: Global warming...
CONS: doesn't exist. And even if it does, its harmful effects are easily remedied by cranking up the air conditioning to full blast.

32: What is the meanest most low-down thing a person can do during a kid's soccer game?
LIBL: Keep score.

43: What would you consider a valid reason for releasing a convict from prison before he has served his entire sentence?

CONS:
- He is dead.

LIBL:
- He is dying.
- His sentence was cut in half for not committing any other notably heinous crimes while serving his current sentence.
- He has found God.
- A famous celebrity thinks the convict is rehabilitated.

LBRT:
- He is innocent.

COMM:
- He has found Lenin.

48: What kind of tattoo would you get?
LBRT: A marijuana leaf on my butt.

51: A business cheats a customer. The government should...
COMM: transfer ownership of the business to its workers.

61: The way to relieve prison overcrowding is to...
CONS: throw everybody into solitary confinement.

66: The speed limit should be...
LBRT: abolished. This will result in an immediate 50 percent reduction in highway fatalities, because a motorist barreling along at 150 MPH only spends half the time exposed to the hazards of the road, as someone plodding along at 75 MPH.

76: What bizarre practices conducted by some human cultures do you find particularly barbaric?
COMM: Free enterprise.


Hahahaha, this is the best thing ever.
« Last Edit: June 01, 2005, 03:45:48 pm by Senator Gabu, PPT »Logged



"To me, 'underground' sounds like subway trains.  That's the only sound I associate with 'underground'." - Everett
Blerpiez
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« Reply #10 on: June 01, 2005, 03:26:58 pm »
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LOL!

Through 40:

Cons - 6
Libl - 16
Lbrt - 13
Comm - 5
« Last Edit: June 01, 2005, 03:34:24 pm by Blerpiez »Logged

The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it.  -  P. J. O'Rourke
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Lewis Trondheim
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« Reply #11 on: June 01, 2005, 04:09:27 pm »
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"Deep within the heart of every person is ...
...an extremist who thinks he is a centrist."
Truer words have not oft been spoken.

My complete result:
Liberal 75
Communist 47
Libertarian 44
Conservative 13
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Hitchabrut
republicanjew18
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E: 8.38, S: 7.49

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« Reply #12 on: June 01, 2005, 05:37:13 pm »
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ACLU is Libertarian? Whatever.
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Brace yourselves for me.

Economic Left/Right: 7.05
Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: 0.67
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Lewis Trondheim
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« Reply #13 on: June 01, 2005, 05:41:24 pm »
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ACLU is Libertarian? Whatever.
Yeah, quite a lot of those libertarian options (far from all) assume a left-libertarian bent. Although this one was really odd.
Helps to explain why I got so many Libertarian answers, btw.
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opebo
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« Reply #14 on: June 01, 2005, 05:43:41 pm »
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ACLU is Libertarian? Whatever.

Obviously.
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The essence of democracy at its purest is a lynch mob

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