Satirical Political Beliefs Test

[Јas]

http://www.geocities.com/donaldjhagen/humoroustest.html

Don't know if anyone flagged this before, but here it is anyway. 178 questions which should help you find your place on the political spectrum and/or something to enjoy.

[DanielX]

My results:
CONS 51 (28.5%)
LIBL 5 (2.8%)
LBRT 122 (68.2%)
COMM 1 (0.6%)

[Vasall des Midas]

No time to complete this now, but after twenty questions I'm at
Liberal 8
Communist 7
Libertarian 4
Conservative 1, on cloning, and I hope I remain at 1.

EDIT: (to 40, gotta run now)
Liberal 15
Communist 15
Libertarian 8
Conservative 2

[Richard]

108: What should be the minimum requirement for getting a high school diploma?

Conservatives:
-  4 years English Literature
-  4 years Latin
-  Biology, Chemistry, and Physics
-  Algebra, Geometry, Algebra II, and Pre-calculus
-  4 years History
-  1 year Western Civilization
-  1 year Basic Economics
-  1 year Marksmanship and Firearms Safety.

Libruhls:
-  Able to read at a 6th grade level 
-  Able to write well enough to fill out a job application
-  Able to add and subtract well enough to balance a checkbook (with the aid of a pocket calculator).
-  1 year Eastern Civilization
-  4 years Health, Hygiene and Human Sexual Practices


Libertarians:
-  Getting passing grades on all your classes.

Commies:
-  Perfect conduct



HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Јas]

For the record:
LIBL:    85
LBRT:   59
CONS:  18
COMM: 16

[MaC]

love this one, I got pretty much all libertarian answers except for about 20 conservative and three liberal.

[○∙◄☻¥tπ[╪AV┼cVê└]

Holy sh**t some of the questions are biased like #158.

Conservative: 10
Liberal: 107
Libertarian: 47
Communist: 15

[CARLHAYDEN]

I love it!

[Grad Students are the Worst]

Haha! This is great. Some of my favourites:

11: Endangered spotted owls are spotted nesting in New York City's Central Park.  Do you...
CONS: Call for an immediate return for to unfettered logging in the Pacific Northwest.

15: What extremist groups have you joined?
CONS: The Chamber of Commerce

16: A cup with that only contains half a cup of water is...
LBRT: an example of shortages caused by government control of our water supply.

19: Cloning human beings..
LIBL: must be outlawed.  The only permissible nontraditional ways to produce offspring are in vitro fertilization, hiring a surrogate mother, and wife swapping.

Genius.

[Gabu]

My favorites, updated as I go along:

24: Global warming...
CONS: doesn't exist.  And even if it does, its harmful effects are easily remedied by cranking up the air conditioning to full blast.

32: What is the meanest most low-down thing a person can do during a kid's soccer game?
LIBL: Keep score.

43: What would you consider a valid reason for releasing a convict from prison before he has served his entire sentence?

CONS:
-  He is dead.

LIBL:
-  He is dying.
-  His sentence was cut in half for not committing any other notably heinous crimes while serving his current sentence.
-  He has found God.
-  A famous celebrity thinks the convict is rehabilitated.

LBRT:
-  He is innocent.

COMM:
-  He has found Lenin.

48: What kind of tattoo would you get?
LBRT: A marijuana leaf on my butt.

51: A business cheats a customer.  The government should...
COMM: transfer ownership of the business to its workers.

61: The way to relieve prison overcrowding is to...
CONS: throw everybody into solitary confinement.

66: The speed limit should be...
LBRT: abolished.  This will result in an immediate 50 percent reduction in highway fatalities, because a motorist barreling along at 150 MPH only spends half the time exposed to the hazards of the road, as someone plodding along at 75 MPH.

76: What bizarre practices conducted by some human cultures do you find particularly barbaric?
COMM: Free enterprise.


Hahahaha, this is the best thing ever.

[Blerpiez]

LOL!

Through 40:

Cons - 6
Libl - 16
Lbrt - 13
Comm - 5

[Vasall des Midas]

"Deep within the heart of every person is ...
...an extremist who thinks he is a centrist."
Truer words have not oft been spoken.

My complete result:
Liberal 75
Communist 47
Libertarian 44
Conservative 13

[Hitchabrut]

ACLU is Libertarian? Whatever.

[Vasall des Midas]

ACLU is Libertarian? Whatever.

Yeah, quite a lot of those libertarian options (far from all) assume a left-libertarian bent. Although this one was really odd.
Helps to explain why I got so many Libertarian answers, btw.

[opebo]

ACLU is Libertarian? Whatever.

Obviously.