The Kalwejt Foundation for the Promotion of Atlas Hilarity

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Hopefully UK or Zags are in the last two teams and Zags win, but I had Louisville instead of Kentucky.

Why don't u like Oregon

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

"Chris Cocker"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiqkDm9UoKo

Reported for homophobia

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

I'm going to apply for the job - I think I'm a good fit for the culture.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

1. Ronald Wilson Reagan
2. William Jefferson Clinton
3. Barack Obama

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Identity Politics at its finest folks.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Yes, I watch sports and was a Cubs and Cavs and Packers fan. However, since moving to the Sunbelt like CA, I am a Raiders, Dubs and Dodgers fan.

I hate to have to explain a joke, but there are just so many levels here this is some peak content.

>Changing allegiances
>San Francisco=Sunbelt
>Switching the favourite NBA team between the only two legitimate NBA teams that actually exist
>The Raiders will not even play in California in one year, and that was selected as the new favourite team with this knowledge despite three other options existing

I'm probably missing some more jokes in this because this is just so well written it blows my mind.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

It's not useless, just faintly but distinctly immoral.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Clay finally posted good content!

"Two current and two former officials told The Washington Post that in March Trump asked Rogers and Director of National Intelligence Daniel Coats to publicly deny the existence of any evidence of collusion between his campaign and Russia during the 2016 election."

Trump "asked"...he didn't "hope."

He was asking a question, not giving an order.

Here we go.  I knew it would wouldn't be long until the excuses started.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

If she picks him and Murphy-Oliver wins, she would be the first black lieutenant governor, the first black female lieutenant governor and the second lieutenant governor. She'd probably be the third lieutenant governor running mate (Weinberg, Guadagno, Silva in 2009 and 2013)

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Obvious FF, and certainly better than most of his detractors. Pretty amusing how he manages to get under RINO Tom's skin.

LOL?  When he talks shlt and I respond, that doesn't mean he "got under my skin," though I know you *populists* stick together.

I was exaggerating a bit, but yes, I do enjoy your little feud. Whenever one of you posts something, I know EXACTLY what the other one's immediate response will look like.

Atlas needs stability, or it will crumble.

Finally saying something conservative!

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Original or not, idc, this is incredible.

You must be logged in to read this quote.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Ugh, I wasn't going to betray his trust yesterday, but this is pretty funny, and I'd really like to piece this timeline together for maximum hilarity. So if a good moderator is going to do it...

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Because my profile says female, straight boys have a certain imagination of what the outside of me already looks like by extension if they aren't long-time posters. An eye opening experience on male privilege.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Care 0%
Fairness 0%
Loyalty 0%
Authority 30.6%
Purity 0%
Liberty 100%

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Then how did Margaret Thatcher get elected in the UK? How did Golda Meir get elected in Israel? How did Angela Merkel get elected in Germany? How did Christie Todd Whitman get elected governor in N.J?

Gold, bronz, Gold!!

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

A Luftwaffe pilot helped protect a U.S. Army Air Forces pilot's life.

(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_Brown_and_Franz_Stigler_incident)

This doesn't absolve the evil of Nazi Germany because of the kind actions of one man. Same goes for Antifa.

WTF is wrong with you?  What is wrong with being anti-fa?

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Good in theory. It's just when it's implemented that it starts to be a problem.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

I feel for the victims but they could’ve at least waited until after season 6.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Context: Scholars rank Trump as the worst President in American history

Hahahahahaha [...]

Hate to say I told you so, but...I told you so.

I’d also like to say that the American electorate who put him there are among the worst generation, making their grandparents rotate in their graves.  To the Trump voters, I give a giant F you and a middle finger.

I'm fully aware that I'm very likely to be the only one who laughed out loud at that. I've never seen anyone say "spinning" in their grave like that

If this is what the Russians sent us, then I am completely ready to admit that they totally swung the election to Trump.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Post of the year candidate

Armed guards in school will work...until of course a guard decides to shoot up some kids.

A white teacher shooting an unruly black student because "they feared for their own safety"

A black teacher shooting a white student because of "suburban white privilege". Can't wait to see that happen. The left would eat that up.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

I cannot bear to wait two more hours for this #tbt

We know that Rafael Nadal is one of the greatest tennis players of our generation, he's one of my favorite players in all sports. He has 13 Grand Slams, and is very popular in the media. However, some say that he's dull in terms of play, very, very charisma-challenged to point of insomnia and doesn't bring nothing in terms of popularity in the U.S.. What does he bring to tennis?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFH_q-QrPt0
Look at the Youtube video. Nadal has no charisma whatsover. Zzzzzzzzzz. So safe. So boring.

My overall view:
Pros: Hispanic appeal in NM, CO, TX. Great champion. Safe personality, unassuming. Good "ambassador" to tennis.
Cons: Nobody's going to be excited about Rafael Nadal. Some say he uses steroids to enhance performance. Seen him play in Grand Slams too many times. Do Hispanics care about Nadal? Do people even recongize him?

Appeals to: Hispanics (as claimed), insomniacs, Polish-American tennis lovers (in big Midwestern cities in MN, WI, OH) adores Nadal, tennis watchers
Alienates: Nobody
Risk factor: So unrisky that when the press corps and ESPN cover another Nadal-Djokovic match on TV they go into sleep
Bottom line: Great champion, but too low-risk and low-reward to excite tennis watchers.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Donald Trump, because he taught every dipsh**t indulging in "ironic" support that politics are not a joke.

Of course, this led some of them to draw the opposite conclusion that all politics are a joke.

There's a special place in hell for "ironic" Trump supporters.

Trump Towers, Hell

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

My sister has her handbags. Surprising and shocking.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

I'm similar. I never tried any illegal substances, never been in jail, I never had kids out of wedlock. But I often feel out of place around certain friends and co-workers.

I've spoken to some family and other friends about it and they seem to have a theory. They think I'm "smart".

One BIG thing that I didn't do, was get a credit card. I know some might think that is stupid

It's longer, but I think that's enough of a sample for you to burst out laughing that the rest doesn't matter.

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

Height: 5'11
Weight: 127

I could bench you easy

Unintentional puns are the best puns!