Do you think the red is not needed here?

[True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자)]

I think it would be better if you got rid of the word in red. The reader would still understand the point if you only put a conjunction there. No need for extra emphasis in that paragraph, the conjunction "and" settles all your problems.

Not quite. Since the second half 'concern for' is a verb followed by a preposition, the first half needs to be as well. Otherwise the first half in isolation would read 'awareness for literacy problems ' but 'awareness for' is not good English.