Comedy Goldmine VII: Straight-to-DVD Christmas Special

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

I've got the next Agree or Disagree idea. 
"Coyote Ugly is bad even for a chick flick?"

You've got Mail is the friggen' Godfather next to Coyote Ugly.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Isn't it a little early to be posting this thread?

Have you seen Politico's prediction?

Yes, but I don't remember it because I was too busy laughing.

[Keystone Phil]

should I place a TWO obama bumper stickers on my car, one on the front bumper and one on the back?  or should I just roll down the windows and jam to Stevie Wonder's Ebony&Ivory?

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Hey, that is the place Nixon went to college.

[Joe Republic]

Damn, I quoted the wrong thing.  I am retarded.  I keep quoting wrong passages and spelling words wrong.  And I forgot what I was going to say.  Oh yeah.  I'll say this.  Either McCain's campaign is the best-run campaign ever, or one of the worst in history.  One or the other.  Or somewhere in between.  I don't know what I'm talking about.

[Lunar]

 Ok this one is funny because it's true [for him] - props though, hah.

The 5 biggest Freedom Fighters alive today:

1-Guy Picciotto
2-That stripper who gave me an unrequested handjob.
3-opebo
4-Al Franken
5-Barack Obama

[Tender Branson]

Click for context:

comeback

[Brittain33]

Joke state.
/sarcasm

Have you ever been there? It is a joke state. Sorry Joe.

Yes I have.  And no, the state isn't a joke.  It's a good place to incorporate your company or buy stuff (no sales tax).  The only joke is the toll the state charges you to drive a whopping 15 miles through it.

No state is a joke, regardless of how it votes.  I'm tired of seeing hacks call Republican-leaning states jokes.  They're not.

No, no, think about it.  If Delaware were to break off and float into the Atlantic, would you really notice?  No way.  Three weeks later, you'd be like, "weird, I haven't gotten a credit card offer in a while.  Huh."  And then your life would go on, blissfully Delaware-free.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Does anyone, even GOP hacks, take this guy seriously?

A little closer than most polls show it.

Because it's potentially a tossup.

let me guess. because the GOP held its convention there?

No, because I said so.

[Хahar 🤔]

Xahar by far. He's far more knowledgeable about politics and history and he isn't an incessant flip-flopper.

I'll show you incessant flip-flopping... that's my sister when she's making pancakes.  I mean she flips the f**king things like 14 f**king times to the point that they're like rubber bullets.  That's about how they feel when they hit your gullet, too.  Then they come out in a fashion not unlike Ru Paul railing a fat chick on crutches.  But, I digress.  The point is, and there is a point, that sometimes flip flopping is necessary in order to formulate a positive outcome, because, alas, people have short memories.  I was driving up 35 the other day and I saw an agitated cow flipping the bird to passersby.  I thought to myself "why the hell aren't you in the barn producing milk" until I saw the balls on that f**ker... and you ain't seen balls until you saw this sad SOB.  So I can understand this guy's disposition.. I mean those things hang and that's gotta hurt having corn stalk stubble running across the bottom of your sack while you're just trying to peruse greener pastures.  Which is the problem with America.  We're always so god damn worried about the corn stubble rubbing our balls that we can't even be grateful for the neighbor's green pasture.  And that's why I support Barack Obama.

[/angus]

[dead0man]

How is this even a question? Hell how is this close?

Of all the people to complain about a poll....

[opebo]

I think Dole pulls her's out, barely. 

[Lunar]

I didn't think that was an actual quote but yeah, hahaha.

[tik 🪀✨]

Sorry if this has already been posted, but I just saw it and found it hilarious.

Excluding major external events, the probability of a McCain victory depends on the probability of a certain scenario (in the realm of reasonable scenarios, given the information that we have) occurring.

is that from The Seach for Spock?

No, think more recently...

lol

still wrong?  Well, I'm fresh out of strangely colored guys that say a lot of aggravating crap.

...UNLESS:

[Bacon King]

No, look:

Latest Mason-Dixon: McCain +23

Margin of error -- down to McCain +16!

Mormons will stay home, call it the Two-Handed Romney Effect, McCain +3

Now, 24 hours of "all about Utah" from Obama, and even with a Bradley Effect, it's in the bag.

This will offset a loss in very-tied Iowa.

[Robespierre's Jaw]

I have some connections to the FBI, but I will not reveal them, so don't bother asking.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

What a comeback by McCain, to be down double digits.

If John McCain posted on the Atlas...atleast he wouldn't have frickin' hieroglyphics as his screenname. He's coming back...GET OVER IT!

[Robespierre's Jaw]

Something like that. Sounds like a pretty miserable first term for Kerry.

That map strangely, but predictably, gives me a boner.

Pretty accurate map.

[Lunar]

Is it just me, or is CARL's obsession with me getting a little creepy?

Facts mean nothing to Lunar and his ilk.

All he can engage in is name calling.

[Хahar 🤔]

Why is a candidate doing so well sending out urgent requests for more volunteers. especially one with a good ground game?

God you're such a liar

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Obama by 23, ±31%

[Sensei]

They were probably pissed off cause you just kept changing the signs all the damn time.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

that will be my favorite part of tomorrow.   That ending.

[Keystone Phil]

Quote of Election day:

I drove past four precincts to get lunch.  The only line I saw was that KFC. 

[Хahar 🤔]

Opebo, I can't believe you didn't vote in Missouri! McCain is now going to win that damn state by a few hundred votes!

As much as I feel I deserve them, I don't have a few hundred votes..