Comedy Goldmine VII: Straight-to-DVD Christmas Special

[King]

"Senator Obama will be in Sacramento this weekend campaigning, come out and fight for change!"

"Senator Obama's poll numbers have risen. He now has a 6 point lead according to Gallup. Volunteer locally to help us bring change and hope to America."

"John McCain is spreading lies. Go to Fightthesmears.com to join Barack against the politics of the past."

"Senator Obama just farted. Come join him in his fight for change!"

[King]

Topic: Should the Republicans have nominated a homeless man?

You have a good chance of getting a veteran who understands military issues too.

[Bacon King]

I have inside sources.

[Robespierre's Jaw]

Why would I want to watch a grown man jacking off to CNN?

Well actually, to be fair, he'd probably have one of his servants do the brunt of the work for him.

[Eraserhead]

I have inside sources.

Post of the year? Possibly.

[DownWithTheLeft]

Good thing Josh is back, the goldmine was drying up:

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=81266.msg1680034#new

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Now children, we shall observe a diseased mind at work:

Here's how I predict the next few rounds to go:
Someone who prays to FDR at night votes for someone else
Conservatives vote for FDR
Others who pray to FDR continue to be blind sheep to save FDR
Good presidents are voted off in an effort to save this slimeball
Eventually FDR is done away with

Here's how I predict the next few rounds to go:
Someone who prays to FDR at night votes for someone else
Conservatives vote for FDR
Others who pray to FDR continue to be blind sheep to save FDR
Good presidents are voted off in an effort to save this slimeball
Eventually FDR is done away with

Would this be similar to how Republicans pray to Reagan at night?

Yes, we often do get down on and pray for him to spring back to life.  However, we also pray that FDR does not come back so that we can avoid socialism and interventionism

You realize that he didn't create WWII, we were attacked, right?  Or do you think he planned Pearl Harbor?

1.) I believe he knew about it
2.) He attacked the wrong goddamn country, much worse than Bush going after Iraq AFTER Afghanistan
3.) His aid of the British and taking it up the ass from Churchill is why they were so pissed

1)  No US President would intentionally do that.
2)  He did go to war with Japan.
3)  Support any friend.

1.) Lincoln encouraged war too, this was nothing new
2.) He went to war with Japan after Germany
3.) Sounds like the stupid Israeli policy that is screwing us now

Dammit, looks like FDR might survive another round.  I wish Sam would have gone for FDR, I'm more than happy to help out with Lincoln after FDR is through.  But seriously he shouldn't have escaped round 1, this is ridiculous

He's a Top 5 president regardless of what the lunatic fringe on the right wing thinks.

Reagan is also a Top 5 president, regardless of what the lunatic fringe on the left wing thinks.

Reagan is not a Top 5 president.

Reagan can't hold FDR's jock in term of accomplishments.

Your right this is a great list of achievement:
1.) Create nanny state
2.) Realize it doesn't work, so create war to fix it
3.) Leave America with a war and economic problems

[King]

By a long shot, could it be Caroline Kennedy for vice president. This wouild bring camelot back into the political world.

[Colin]

By a long shot, could it be Caroline Kennedy for vice president. This wouild bring camelot back into the political world.

My Dad said the same thing when he came home today. Me and my Mom proceeded to laugh at him for about 5 minutes straight.

[Sensei]

By a long shot, could it be Caroline Kennedy for vice president. This wouild bring camelot back into the political world.

My Dad said the same thing when he came home today. Me and my Mom proceeded to laugh at him for about 5 minutes straight.

Maybe GPorter is your dad?

[Beet]

Honestly, I could live with a Caroline Kennedy Vice Presidency, as long as she never became President.

[Colin]

By a long shot, could it be Caroline Kennedy for vice president. This wouild bring camelot back into the political world.

My Dad said the same thing when he came home today. Me and my Mom proceeded to laugh at him for about 5 minutes straight.

Maybe GPorter is your dad?

Nah, I think he heard it from Hannity on the way home from work. I wouldn't be suprised if Mr. Porter got it from the same place.

[The Mikado]

By a long shot, could it be Caroline Kennedy for vice president. This wouild bring camelot back into the political world.

My Dad said the same thing when he came home today. Me and my Mom proceeded to laugh at him for about 5 minutes straight.

Maybe GPorter is your dad?

[Associate Justice PiT]

By a long shot, could it be Caroline Kennedy for vice president. This wouild bring camelot back into the political world.

My Dad said the same thing when he came home today. Me and my Mom proceeded to laugh at him for about 5 minutes straight.

Maybe GPorter is your dad?

     That made me laugh.

[minionofmidas]

Doesn't Obama at least get an unrealistic neighboring state advantage, too?

No. The neighboring state advantage has historically only applied to the Vice Presidential nominee.

Cheap laugh maybe, but laugh I did.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

I'm amazed at how poor Biden is. I mean his Senate salary isn't too bad. $169k is nothing to sneeze at.

Oh come on - $169,000 in Washington D.C., living well?  GONE.

But I would imagine some of his poor financial condition comes from campaign expenditures/debts?

He has a safe seat in Delaware... why should he spend on campaigning? Makes no sense.

He probably donates all of his income to poor Luos living in Nairobi.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Sup 330am text message.

Well, at least if he's up texting at 3:30am then he's probably going to be able to answer that 3am phone call when it comes through.

[WalterMitty]

Actually, I'm sure Sonny Perdue could lead his state in prayer to get rid of the Russians quickly. So the State of Georgia is safe.

[Хahar 🤔]

BWWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

Obama couldn't have picked a better VP.... to hand McCain the Election!!!!!

[Јas]

Someone who goes AWOL for 2000+ years doesn't seem like much of a freedom fighter to me.

Vitalism! Discrimination against the chronically dead!

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Context needed:

ANDY RODDICK IS SO GOING TO WIN THE US OPEN THIS YEAR

[YRABNNRM]

You know me...many say I'm "old fashioned" for a 19 year old guy. But, I found the whole "Obama Text Message Running Mate" thing to be very girly and immature.

I'm not saying I've never sent text messages before...but I just picture some bimbo chick checking her "cell" to see if "Barry" left a "text". It's so trendy...and I hate changing, trendy stuff.

Therefore, I'm glad it isn't a big deal anymore.

[CPT MikeyMike]

February 30th, 9:00 PM, President Johnson addresses the nation from the white house. The speech opens a new plan for the peace aggreement in the Vietnam War. The President talks about the history of the country and vietnam. He minchens Kennedy and Eisenhower and what they did with Vietnam. He asks the country to come together and support this peace package.

As he gets to the end of the speech, he knows that it is time to talk about the election. President Johnson ends his speech with the following...

"With America's sons in the fields far away, with America's future under possible attack by a country far away, with America's hope and future in jeporady more every day, I do not think that I should spend an hour or a day of my time to any personal partisan causes or to any duties other to this office-the Presidency of your country. Therefore, I shall not seek and I will not accept the nomination of my party for another term as your President."

My word...he can get any worse?!?

[Хahar 🤔]

February 30th, 9:00 PM, President Johnson addresses the nation from the white house. The speech opens a new plan for the peace aggreement in the Vietnam War. The President talks about the history of the country and vietnam. He minchens Kennedy and Eisenhower and what they did with Vietnam. He asks the country to come together and support this peace package.

As he gets to the end of the speech, he knows that it is time to talk about the election. President Johnson ends his speech with the following...

"With America's sons in the fields far away, with America's future under possible attack by a country far away, with America's hope and future in jeporady more every day, I do not think that I should spend an hour or a day of my time to any personal partisan causes or to any duties other to this office-the Presidency of your country. Therefore, I shall not seek and I will not accept the nomination of my party for another term as your President."

My word...he can get any worse?!?

You're clearly unfamiliar with "ReaganRepublican Campaign HQ". All of the threads have been deleted, I think.

[CPT MikeyMike]

February 30th, 9:00 PM, President Johnson addresses the nation from the white house. The speech opens a new plan for the peace aggreement in the Vietnam War. The President talks about the history of the country and vietnam. He minchens Kennedy and Eisenhower and what they did with Vietnam. He asks the country to come together and support this peace package.

As he gets to the end of the speech, he knows that it is time to talk about the election. President Johnson ends his speech with the following...

"With America's sons in the fields far away, with America's future under possible attack by a country far away, with America's hope and future in jeporady more every day, I do not think that I should spend an hour or a day of my time to any personal partisan causes or to any duties other to this office-the Presidency of your country. Therefore, I shall not seek and I will not accept the nomination of my party for another term as your President."

My word...he can get any worse?!?

You're clearly unfamiliar with "ReaganRepublican Campaign HQ". All of the threads have been deleted, I think.

Oh no, I'm very well aware of that comical thread. His policy on Affirmative Action still cracks me up!

Come on - I think dating something February 30th is about as special as one can get.