Comedy Goldmine VII: Straight-to-DVD Christmas Special

[Associate Justice PiT]

Naso spoiling Kindergarten Cop sent the previous edition into a downward spiral of epic fail.

     If only San Francisco teachers were allowed to pack heat. They're the ones who need it.

...

     Yay! I made it into the Comedy Goldmine!

[Associate Justice PiT]

This pictures maybe fake, but Ghost/Sprits aren't. I personally have seen some.

I rest my case.

Yea, I was 99% sure ghosts existed, that has now dropped to about 40%

DTWL, why do you hate me? Why do you always cut me down? Is it because you were picked on in school, and know you try to make your self feel bigger by picking on someone over the computer? You are a sorry excuse for a man.

In this particular instance its because someone who believes the Earth is 6,008 years old obviously will believe anything.  Usually its because I've had more intelligent conversations with the paper weight on my desk

I believe the earth is around 6,008 years old because that is what the Bible says. And you can't believe some part of the bible, you have to believe all the bible, you can't cherry pick what you like and don't like. Anyways, I done with you, because the fact is, if you and I were face to face you wouldn't be talk sh**t to me, because you hind behind your computer. So why don't you go talk to your paper weight again, I'm sure it likes you.

Its scary that he watches the Flintstones like its a documentary.

     When I first learned that Creationists still existed, I couldn't believe it. Considering how much evidence there is in favor of a billions of years old universe, it seems fundamentally untenable to believe that the Earth's only 6,000 years old. Then again, maybe that's just me, actually believing empirical evidence over the say-so of Genesis (which probably was not meant to be taken literally).

[Associate Justice PiT]

This pictures maybe fake, but Ghost/Sprits aren't. I personally have seen some.

I rest my case.

Yea, I was 99% sure ghosts existed, that has now dropped to about 40%

DTWL, why do you hate me? Why do you always cut me down? Is it because you were picked on in school, and know you try to make your self feel bigger by picking on someone over the computer? You are a sorry excuse for a man.

In this particular instance its because someone who believes the Earth is 6,008 years old obviously will believe anything.  Usually its because I've had more intelligent conversations with the paper weight on my desk

I believe the earth is around 6,008 years old because that is what the Bible says. And you can't believe some part of the bible, you have to believe all the bible, you can't cherry pick what you like and don't like. Anyways, I done with you, because the fact is, if you and I were face to face you wouldn't be talk sh**t to me, because you hind behind your computer. So why don't you go talk to your paper weight again, I'm sure it likes you.

Its scary that he watches the Flintstones like its a documentary.

     When I first learned that Creationists still existed, I couldn't believe it. Considering how much evidence there is in favor of a billions of years old universe, it seems fundamentally untenable to believe that the Earth's only 6,000 years old. Then again, maybe that's just me, actually believing empirical evidence over the say-so of Genesis (which probably was not meant to be taken literally).

Hey.  I believe a supreme being created the universe, i just choose not to take Genesis all that literally.

Damnit I have the Flintstones tune in my head...When you're with the Flintstones...you're gonna have a yabba dabba do time...

     I used to be very religious. I just never took the story of Creation as anything more than a metaphor (& I assumed everyone else saw it the same way).

[Associate Justice PiT]

     Oh! Can I start the next goldmine when this one closes?

[Associate Justice PiT]

I nominate BRTD for the saddest assclown currently working in the Goldmine.

     I second that nomination.

[Associate Justice PiT]

By a long shot, could it be Caroline Kennedy for vice president. This wouild bring camelot back into the political world.

My Dad said the same thing when he came home today. Me and my Mom proceeded to laugh at him for about 5 minutes straight.

Maybe GPorter is your dad?

     That made me laugh.

[Associate Justice PiT]

You people make me physically ill.

We'll have universal health care for you soon enough.

     I actually considered re-posting that here.

[Associate Justice PiT]

I strongly disagree with this ruling.  Transsexuals aren't considered human by biblical standards and therefore shouldn't have any constitutional rights.

Interesting troll, but what about if one's gender is changed by accident - say a mishap with the lawn-mowing machine?

[Associate Justice PiT]

Click for context:

With lipstick?

That whole thread is pretty funny.

Either it was vaporized or there's a VIP area of the site I don't have access to.

     Considering the subject of the thread, I would be surprised if it weren't vaporized.

[Associate Justice PiT]

no but I do not hold it against them. that is just pure hitler.

[Associate Justice PiT]

Gporter is back!  Please read his senate thread.  Gays, genocide, and more!

Post a link, friend.

     The post I quoted from DC_united was from that thread.

[Associate Justice PiT]

Click for context:

With lipstick?

That whole thread is pretty funny.

Either it was vaporized or there's a VIP area of the site I don't have access to.

     Considering the subject of the thread, I would be surprised if it weren't vaporized.

What was the subject?

     Bush standing up to the "Zionist pigs."

[Associate Justice PiT]

     He does raise a point though. Almost every girl or woman I meet who I am interested in is in a happy relationship & has been for years. I should move to Oklahoma & take advantage of the 71% divorce rate there.

[Associate Justice PiT]

when you look for women, don't try to hard. We can spell it.

     This is instant goldmine material, just because of the misspelling.

[Associate Justice PiT]

when you look for women, don't try to hard. We can spell it.

     This is instant goldmine material, just because of the misspelling.

sorry my bad.

     Not at all. It made my day.

[Associate Justice PiT]

when you look for women, don't try to hard. We can spell it.

     This is instant goldmine material, just because of the misspelling.

sorry my bad.

     Not at all. It made my day.

well then, you days must be wonerful cause i can't spell for sh**t.

Just run outside, meet on your mutual neighbor's lawn and make out already, children.

     We live five miles away from each other.

[Associate Justice PiT]

when you look for women, don't try to hard. We can spell it.

     This is instant goldmine material, just because of the misspelling.

sorry my bad.

     Not at all. It made my day.

well then, you days must be wonerful cause i can't spell for sh**t.

Just run outside, meet on your mutual neighbor's lawn and make out already, children.

     We live five miles away from each other.

we do?

     Maybe not that far, but we do live rather far apart.

[Associate Justice PiT]

Ladies and gentlemen, yet another modern day Romeo and Juliet on our forum!

you wish. not gonna happen.

     Unfortunately for me.

[Associate Justice PiT]

Older women disgust me. Imagine how loose they are!

Miley Cyrus won't be the queen of purity for much longer Duke, and soon enough she'll be loose too!

Miley Cyrus sucks! She is going to turn out like the spears girls. eww

     Thank you for stating the obvious.

[Associate Justice PiT]

I was thinking it was time to retire this, but fortunately it's rebounded.

     Yep. Phil, DC, & I beat the goldmine within an inch of its life. I'm glad it's back on its feet though.

[Associate Justice PiT]

     Hilariously random:

something to think about I don't think America has ever had an Italian catholic president

Uh...something you have to "think" about? Our only Catholic President was John F. Kennedy - obviously an Irish Catholic. I think that answers it

yeah something I have to think about I'm trying to say we have never had an Italian president Obviously an Irish catholic, I'm not sure what you meant by that Phil are you trying to say that all Irish catholics are lazy drunk potato farmers , I get it Phil..... its typical I thought you where better then that.     

You need to apologize dude that was totally  Un- called for.

[Associate Justice PiT]

Sad to see that Ohio is leaving America and joining the racist theocratic religious fundamentalist backwater known as the South.

[Associate Justice PiT]

A sh**tty state deserves sh**tty representation.

True, but this thread isn't about Massachusetts.

[Associate Justice PiT]

ABIDING BY THE POSTED SPEED LIMIT AND OBSERVING THE RIGHT OF WAY OF THE BLIND


PUSSIES

epic post

     Sarcasm at its finest.

[Associate Justice PiT]

...also, penguins live outside of Antarctica.  The Galapagos Penguin for one.

We have fairy penguins in Victoria.

     There are penguins all over the place. Just not in the Northern Hemisphere.