Where is BushOklahoma?

[afleitch]

They really should see relationship counsellor, preferably nothing to do with church before getting married. I agree with Franzl - occasional minor disagreements should not be the cause of a schism.

[afleitch]

They really should see relationship counsellor, preferably nothing to do with church before getting married. I agree with Franzl - occasional minor disagreements should not be the cause of a schism.

We will go through a marriage counselling session with the pastor thats going to officiate the ceremony.

I prayed for the strength to get through these minor disagreements and its working.  I firmly believe that if I had not prayed, then the minor disagreements would escalate and blow up into something major and be catastrophic.  I pray everday for God's guidance in this relationship.  Ultimately, it was the Lord who put us together, not any human.  He just used my ex as his instrument to join us together.  Wednesday morning, the Lord showed me several things that make me believe that our relationship is definitely His doing, not ours, and that He still has a lot of work to accomplish through our merged lives.  He gave me the reassurance that the only thing that will separate us is death.

Sounds if you feel you have no control over any aspect of this relationship. That it is God's plaything. That is very unhealthy.

For a 27 year old you seem to have quite an immature outlook on the nature of human relationships and especially marriage. Marriage should never be rushed and should be the couples terms only.

[afleitch]

I don't think that is necessarily what people are saying, though if you want to look at this through a religious prism - if marriage is sacred and is blessed by God it should not be entered into lightly. BushOklahoma is 27 but has an attitude to marriage, love and relationships no better than a 15 year old. Just read through his posts. He feels he has no control over this relationship and so is going along with it and this is being re-inforced by the company he keeps. Every person involved in this marriage and in counselling and in preparing for the wedding is from the church, or of Christian counsel. No one is going to tell him anything to the contrary.

And to me that's simply cheap and against everything marriage should be about. I like BushOklahoma as a poster and I'm sure his girlfriend is lovely but it saddens me he holds such a flimsy understanding and appreciation of what marriage entails and what he is going to commit to

[afleitch]

And to me that's simply cheap and against everything marriage should be about. I like BushOklahoma as a poster and I'm sure his girlfriend is lovely but it saddens me he holds such a flimsy understanding and appreciation of what marriage entails and what he is going to commit to

And this is a perfect example of someone who is failing to grasp what is right in front of his face.

The man has some issues. Instead of telling him why his silly faith is "wrong," just tell him to take it slowly and if he doesn't agree, this isn't the place to continue to give him a hard time. You're arguing with someone who has issues, people.

I'm not knocking his faith, which is also mine and yours. I genuinely believe he lacks maturity in his attitudes and that can be destructive. Especially if kids are introduced into the relationship at some point in the near future.

[afleitch]

And the "issues" I'm talking about aren't the stupid issues you have, Flyers. I can't believe people aren't picking up on the damn hints that I'm dropping about BushOK's personality...

I haven't picked them up I'm afraid.

[afleitch]

Phil, I don't know much about BuskOK. Most people don't so they take what they see at face value. I don't think anyone gets what you mean about his 'personality' - so unfortunately you have to expect people to look at what we do know about him - namely his strong faith and how that influences him.

And to get a little personal for the moment, for someone who would really like to get married and preferrably to my partner of 4 years (though the debate on that is for another topic) to see someone walk into it so damn lightly and after just meeting someone, it annoys me to see how expendable some people view marriage.

[afleitch]

Does this 'issue' have anything to do with something I would know quite a bit about? I hate being cryptic, but it's the first thing that pops into my mind. If it's not, it's best to clear it.

[afleitch]

Does this 'issue' have anything to do with something I would know quite a bit about? I hate being cryptic, but it's the first thing that pops into my mind. If it's not, it's best to clear it.

A small penis is not always a deal-breaker, afleitch.

No...that's not something I would know 'quite a bit about'