The CrabCake Bureau of Funny Post Archival

[King]

wow such nuance
much intelligence
wow

[IceSpear]

I don't have anything against white people. Some of my best friends are white, and growing up my mailman was also white. It's white culture that is the problem.

[IceSpear]

Horrible, because it can encourage use among underage kids (just like flavored cigarettes). 

Lol at being worried about "underage kids" being stoned.  Who cares?  It's THC.  So what if they think about Spongebob deeper and eat more cookies?

[King]

Only 900,000?  The gay agenda calls for at least a 30% increase on that over the next five years.

Every straight fetus is to be aborted.

I did not no this?

[King]

t_host really rolling this morning

 

 Riot  noun ri·ot \ˈrī-ət\; On a scale of 1 -10, the energy displacement of a riot is a 10. Rioting generates overtime benefits for law enforcement. A good old-fashion riot is the Marxist attitude.

 btw, the battery life in those old apple watches are not a problem, when one runs down you just put another one on. Rush “the Hudson” Limbaugh


jao

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

T_host meet Bandit. Bandit, T_host. Sttttrike 3.

 
  It is free for those rich enough with cable TV. Major League Baseball shows baseball game with no fans allowed, a first for the democrat controlled city of Baltimore and MLB. MLB TV has the ceremonial first.

What does this have to do with the Democrats?

oou, nice curve ball.

[Oakvale]

Official currency of Greece: Bitcoin?

[Sopranos Republican]

Mark B Graham,

let's say hypothetically that a certain 26 year old man is on a hot and heavy date with a girl he could've sworn was 19.  Later on a swat team breaks down his front door with a battering ram and then shots him in the leg with a tear gas gun and beats the sh*t out of him and then raids his closet to find about 20 pounds of marijuana.  Oh, and the chick turns out to be the local town sheriff's 16 year old honor student daughter.

Tell me, in your expert opinion how fucked would this poor sonuvabitch be?

[Joe Republic]

Shua is correct. I, personally, am no longer interested in ever marrying a woman, out of fear that some may mistake me for being homosexual.

[🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸]

 

  The success of the liberal left progression to anarchy; to where, law and the court are of no use, to which, brutal uncivil force ensues with Shakespeare prevailing leaving 101 law looking for work.

 …hmm, nah, that’s not an issue.

 Damn, no problem, what’s a lawyer to do?

 Break the law, known in lawyer speak as creating precedence. 

Translation. You see, with the liberal left enervating the saliency of the rule of law, as opposed to the rule of the mob, Shakespeare's comment about killing all the lawyers will become a reality. They are no longer needed. Oh damn, lawyers never die, they don't even fade away. They are like maggots, you just can't get rid of them. And how will lawyers survive it all?  Well, of course by being the spear carriers for judicial activism, with their common law case law precedents which trash statutory law, making them a functional part of the lawless mob themselves. So it's all good - at least for lawyers.

How did I do?

 Yep, you’re certifiable, so much to look forward too.

 Would it be fair to compare the Forest Gump analogy of life is “like a box of chocolate” and law is that of a “pretzel”?  The beginning and the end are indistinguishable, therefore removing the blind lady and scales to that of a pretzel would be more appropriate prior the anarchy.

[Ebsy]

The parties wont stay the same. The Dem party by 2040, will be a full fledged anti-White party. Like the ZA ANC. Kind of like former anti-aprtheid white South Africans who now vote for the National Party.

The Dem party will do everything it has to do to keep blacks and hispancs on the plantation. If that means inflaming racial hatred, they will do it.When they do it, they will lose white votes.

[King]

Ah, so bobloblaw is a white supremacist. I can now ignore him in peace. Always good to see the truth come out.

[Lief 🗽]

I've jumped to the Rand Paul ship.

[IceSpear]

[King]

If her campaign is anything like her corporate tenure, she will spend absurd amounts of money, lay off half her staff, end up polling worse than when she started, and then claim that she came out a winner in all of this because she was strong enough to make difficult choices, or something.

[Brewer]

Freedom, but I haven't seen the 5th season yet.

Same. Odd that us and Snowstalker all would likely have the same reply.

y'all should. there's already been a really good apple bloom episode

[Sopranos Republican]

You honestly just sound like that stuck-up kid everyone knew who would give other kids sh**t because their clothes were from generic affordable chain stores. It's just a haircut.

I'm pretty sure my local barber shop costs less than SuperCuts.

Anyway, horrible (normal, sane)

No, as you see.  In a local barbershop there is an understood relationship between the patron and the owner.  Since you've been going there for a long time/converse with the nice person, you often will "tip" the person.  I know this sounds just awful, I mean, why should this disgusting peon get your hard earned paper money?  But hear me out.  Often this is mutually beneficial.  The owner/barber makes a little extra in his day of work, and you "feel good" for helping out a friend.  So that's where the extra cost comes from.  I know Mr. memphis says he does "tip" at these places, but he is a Democrat and by definition overly generous and well-meaning.  Ask Bushie if he tips at the Sportz Clipz.

Unfortunately, I don't believe I can answer that.

Interpretation: My parents didn't give me money for a tip.  Hey don't judge!  The economy is so tough now days and I am above honest employment!

No, there is a forum rule in place that I cannot divulge personal information or talk about my personal life in anyway.  I don't feel like getting death points...

[Sprouts Farmers Market ✘]

LOL! T_host just outdone himself

 Picture this in the form of a question; with the sport of a SCOTUS hearing being the interpretation of the questions that the 9 appointed black robed biases’ do ask - one jurist ask, would a practitioner of law give resistance to its symbol of conscience, the scales held by the blind lady, replaced by, a fat lady singing holding a ballpark size pretzel? And, sealing the symbols point of contention, the pretzel is dripping with the conscience of man (the cheese) and for good measure; the pretzel has a large bite with a little dripping of that conscience from the cheek of the fat lady singing.

 Is there an equivalency of conscience for the lifelong practice of law, its dedication and honor, too that of, one man, one woman lifelong honored conscience of marriage?

 Does this qualify as an animated issue? Subjecting the conscience change to law as that of the conscience change of marriage is being subjected to.

[Joe Republic]

Hillary Clinton keeps going further and further with the scandals like there is no end.

Her latest e-mail puts the quid-pro-quo favors in the subject line - Calling me by name, and saying she can "make a call" for me. Who does she even think she is?
Of course she conveniently puts that donation button right in there.
"Contribution...will not improve chance of winning" - I'm so sure. At least she's wising up and not doing it for foreign entities anymore.

Keep selling your soul to the highest bidder, Hill. Let's see how the populist rhetoric works.

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

We should only ban 55% of mosques

[Anti Democrat Democrat Club]

I'm not saying that all of god's commandments are things I would be willing to publicly campaign on/advocate for if one asked me to do so. I don't feel god expects me to do so. But if they were to come up at the ballot box as refrendums, then I believe god expects me to vote for them out of faith. Sure, god is the eventual final arbiter on whether someone has been truly repentant and deserves forgiveness. But that doesn't mean he expects man to show a nonchalant attitude towards others' sin.

Ok, well let's cut right to the chase here. Would you vote in favor of the following referendums if they were on the ballot in your state?
1. A ban on all non-Christian marriages (i.e. no state recognition of marriages between Jewish or Muslim couples, etc.)?
2. The establishment of Christianity as the official state religion?
3. A ban on the construction of mosques within the state?
4. A flat-out ban on the practice of Islam?

1. Contrary to what you may believe, god does not declare that a marriage between two unbelievers is a sin (However, a christian who knowingly marries an unbeliever is sinning: https://bible.org/seriespage/17-marriage-matters-1-corinthians-76-24). So, it falls to personal opinion, and I would vote No in this case.

2. Yes
3. Yes
4. Not sure. While this is something god would likely expect me to support, I'm not sure if I could bring myself to actually support it.

--------------

When and if I knowingly go against a commandment of god when taking a position on an issue, there is always a reason for doing it. Maybe I feel it's unenforceable, too intruding, or ridiculously expensive. I do not want to give into those temptations, but the devil finds ways of convincing me that it's what's best for society as a whole.

But when it comes to SSM, my devoted opposition comes with no hesitation whatsoever. Excluding gay couples from marriage is not something that I feel uneasy about doing at all. Some of the people in this world are asking god to change the union of marriage from what it has been for essentially all of time. They are telling god, not even out of temptation, but out of pure wanting to do it without any provoking from the devil at all, that the unions he created aren't good enough for us even though they were good enough for centuries upon centuries. And they should be ashamed of themselves.

[Lief 🗽]

The classy way to go is to just disappear, and then reappear like an veritable apparition of Jesus now and then, or for the more secularly and cosmically inclined, like a comet returning after its long orbit, causing those left on the ground to rotate their necks up so as to gaze and savor it all.  You know just whom I'm talking about.

jmfcst?

[Mechaman]

lol Lincoln caused the Civil War.  That's a new one.

I'm still lost at the part where Jackson was involved with the IRA.

Uh, Jackson was an (Scotch-) Irish Democrat who fought against the British. Of course he was in the IRA. He also created the CSA, the DEA, and the UFC.

LolUFC

[IceSpear]

the political experts on Dave Leip's Atlas Forum told me it was bad though... who to believe??

People who get inspired by John Kasich and Martin O'Malley for President have bad design aesthetic? Who knew!

[Hatman 🍁]

What about Alberta's tomorrow? Will it be somewhere streaming online?

Go to a crossroads at midnight with a bottle of canola oil and a portrait of Ernest Manning