ILV for Re-Governor! (ILV Campaign HQ)

[ilikeverin]

Strike up the band, it's time for the ILV for Re-Governor! bus to head out, dispensing ILV buttons wherever we go!  Yaaay!

[ilikeverin]

I personally endorse ILikeVerin for re-election.

Thank you

[ilikeverin]

The ILV for Re-Governor! campaign kicks off with the releasing of the first set of buttons:



which include the first slogan, "At Least Nothing Bad Has Happened!"

The buttons are also available in mini-buttons:

[ilikeverin]

Thanks PBrunsel

Good luck with your decision/statement/whatever

[ilikeverin]

I'd like to accept everyone's endorsement!

[ilikeverin]

I accept all your endorsements!

I'll actually start speechefying (sp?) tomorrow... hopefully...

[ilikeverin]

As governor of the Midwest Region, and in accordance with the Midwest constitution, I'd like to submit the following Regional Constitutional Amendment:

The Preferential Voting Amendment

Section I, Article I, IV will be replaced by 'Polls will open Friday at noon, Central Time, and close at noon on Sunday, Central Time.  Elections will be held using Instant Runoff Voting.'

Section I, Article I, VI will be taken out of the constitution.

This amendment will take effect by the December elections.

Also, I'd like to propose the following:

Midwest Capitol Act

The capitol of the Midwest Region shall hereby be Lebanon, Kansas.

(explanation: Lebanon is the closest town to the geographic center of the contiguous 48 United States; also, I believe that a currently non-partisan site is the best place )

(If we want the geographic center of all of the US, then Belle Fourche, SD is the place)

(If anyone else has a better idea, state it here and I'll consider it )

[ilikeverin]

I think those amendements are fine. As father of the Midwest Constitution I would not mind them in the Constitution.

Actually, the 2nd one is just an Act

But I'm glad to have your support

[ilikeverin]

Kansas?  Can't we be a little more interesting than that?  How about Denver, CO?

What is the wording of the parts of the constitution you are proposing be changed/deleted?  I know I could go look it up myself, I just want you to be clear about what you're proposing.

Re: Denver: Because Denver has no special significance, of course

Re: Changes:

Section I: The Governorship

Article I: Election of the Governor

...

IV: Polls will open Friday at noon, Central Time, and close at noon on Sunday, Central Time.

...

VI: In case of an election tie there will be a run-off election held the next Friday by the same rules and regulations as stated in Clause IV.

[ilikeverin]

PBrunsel: Naw, we should do Minneapolis, the first UAC convention site

However, Belle Fourche is ~60 miles from Rapid City.

So I retract my first proposal and submit this:

Midwest Capitol Act

The capitol of the Midwest region shall hereby be Belle Fourche, South Dakota.

[ilikeverin]

Meh.  OK.

Section I, Article I, VI will be replaced by 'If the final preference count is tied, then the winner is determined by the candidate who recieved the most first place votes.  If that is tied, then the winner is determined by an instant runoff between the tied candidates.  If that is also tied, then the winner is determined by the current District 3 senator.  If that person is running for governor, then it is decided by the current District 5 senator.  If that person is running, then it is decided by the current District 4 senator.  If that person is running, then John Edwards is the new Governor!  Congrats!'

(OK, I'm just kidding about the last two sentences )

[ilikeverin]

Cassandra Goth, sitting on a very high chair: In an interesting little bit of political news today, Randy Jones has endorsed Governor Ilikeverin for re-election.

*in a spooky room*

Some Random Psychic: Randy Jones, come forth!

Ghost of Randy Jones, eating salad, with a little celsor in his pants: Oooooooh...

SRP: Oh my gawd it's Randy Jones!

GRJ: I have come to you in a matter of grave importance!

SRP: Oh my gawd it's Randy Jones!

GRJ: Be quiet young whippersnapper!  Anyway, I'm here to endorse Governor Ilikeverin for re-election.  Despite Reaganfan's pointless pork helpful projects, I like ilikeverin better.

SRP: Why?

GRJ: Because I think ilikeverin has the same view as me on the tariff: Raise it, lower it, raise it, forget about it, remember it, lower it, raise it to 100%, eliminiate it, raise it to the level that it was in the beginning, then forget about it again.

SRP: Err...

GRJ: Good bye!

Cassandra: And that was today's headline news!

---

[ilikeverin]

ILV Public Service Announcement... Thingy...

Woman: This is your brain.

*the woman puts an egg on a skillet*

Woman: This is your brain on drugs.

*the woman pummels the egg with another skillet unmercifully.  It's almost exactly like the original ad, just with more pummeling.*

*the ad shrinks to a third of the screen*

Man: This is your wallet.

*man puts wallet on floor*

Man: This is your wallet on drugs.

*Rottweilers appear through doors, head to the wallet, and start ripping it up, money and all*

*the ad shrinks to another third of the screen*

2nd Man (overlay): This is your life.

*a normal suburban family, with a wife, a husband, and two cute little kids is on screen*

2nd Man: This is your life on drugs.

*Russian-looking police officers come and drag the wife and kids away.  One of the cute little kids starts screaming and crying as she is led away.  The other seems too shocked to do or say anything.  The father is left alone, looking disheveled, and his clothes have been replaced by rags.*

*the ad shrinks to the final third of the screen.  all three parts are still going*

On screen: Drugs - not harmless little playthings

Brought to you by the Midwest Region Health and Human Services Board

[ilikeverin]

Public Service Announcement Thingy:

The following image gets bigger and bigger on the screen, until it encompasses the entire screen:



In the mean time, the following text is scrolling across the bottom of the screen:
The following diseases are more likely if you use 'smokeless tobacco' Oral Cancer (includes cancers of the mouth, throat, cheek, gums, lips, and tongue), Cancer of the esophagus, larynx, stomach and pancreas, Gum Disease, Leukoplakia (white patches on the gums; 6% become cancerous), Erythroleukoplakia (red patches on the gums; 1/2 become cancerous), High Blood Pressure, and Cardiovascular Disease

After a while, the screen goes black, and white text appears:
Is smokeless tobacco really better for you than smoking?

Brought to you by the Midwest Health and Human Services Board

[ilikeverin]

Shoot, boyhowdy---I'm a-switchin' back to cigarrettes!

I'm taking on smoking next

[ilikeverin]

Bump!

[ilikeverin]

Bump for voters

[ilikeverin]

Oh, and does anyone have any questions for me?