Alright, here goes.
Didn't want to attentionwhore by creating a thread, so I'll just say this here:
I'm addicted to porn. I've been addicted to it since I was 14 years old. I imagine to some of you that sounds like Bushie (except I never paid for any of it), but this is really getting out of hand. For the past week or so I've spent three hours or more daily looking at porn.
I know, masturbation is a natural body function that is no different than blowing snot. However, I don't think it should be natural, or be accepted, for me to spend days at a time addicted to this. To some of you this is no big deal, however to me it's so bad I literally lose sleep on some nights on this sh*t.
And no, this isn't some angsty teenager. I'm 24 years old. And I sure as hell don't want to wake up twenty years from now, living in my parents house fapping my brains out when I could've done a hell of a lot better with the time I still got. I've missed out on who knows how many opportunities because of this habit, hurt, and hangup. This isn't something that's driven out of pure guilt or concern about my eternal salvation (though I will confess that over the last few months I have been active in my church), but just out of need to have a life. A real Finksing life like the rest of humanity.
Over the past year I've gone from an inactive functional alcoholic who had no hopes and aspirations for his future after college who held a wrongful grudge against his God. I turned my anger, my hatred, and my utter lack of hope into. . . . well something. I managed, for a short amount of time, to be gainfully employed and get involved with some friends of mine back home. I no longer have that job, but by grace I've managed to go about sixty days without a drink. And it's been over a year since I last smoked a cigarette. I know this is nonsense to a lot of people, and I can't really blame you for how you came to that conclusion, but I've found God. And it's the best I've felt since. . . . well I don't know when.
But, I still haven't been able to look at myself in the mirror. I want to be able to wake up without resorting to the natural tendency to just rub one off. For me this is spiritual, but at the same time it's very practical. I want to be able to function everyday without having to look at some pictures of naked people having hardcore sex. I want to be able to live again.
So please guys, think of me. Please
Great, now the entire community knows I'm a wanker
