Update XX: A Darn Good Judge of My Financial Situation

[Keystone Phil]

I'll absolutely agree to that. You know I respect you. To quote The Office, "You're a wonderful woman...and you're a helluva bowler!"

That said, do me a favor and have a drink of water. You were complaining about the heat earlier on Facebook. Maybe you can cool down with a glass of ice water.

Wait. Was I not supposed to bring up Facebook here at all?

[Keystone Phil]

Not to sound like an apologist but is it really possible to eat just one hot dog?

[Keystone Phil]

Taking a sip of water right before bed is too strenuous.

The sad fact is that I likely drank more water before and after brushing my teeth this morning than Our Dear Friend will have in three days.

[Keystone Phil]

I skimmed over the last ten pages while on the train home. I felt badly that I skipped reading for a day or two but it looks like things were fairly boring: the usual attacks on Christian fundamentalism and diet suggestions (which he never takes. Just stop trying).

However, I must say the brief discussion of a Kenyan bride is interesting! Anyone ever think to suggest a job search in Kenya? It would check off a lot of Our Dear Friend's boxes!

[Keystone Phil]

Just walked by a man on the train wearing a button that read: "LOSE WEIGHT NOW! ASK ME HOW!"

Odds that his suggestion would have been "Drink Sprite. It does wonders for your family." ?

[Keystone Phil]

Oh, don't misunderstand me here: his comments in defense of his lack of dieting are great. "Sprite does wonders for my family regardless of scientific facts." You can't ask for a more dewildering statement! But I don't care to see seven posts in a row from people giving detailed diet advice when they really don't care to see him doing better anyway. The clogging of the thread doesn't make those one or two comedy nuggets worth it. He provides plenty of comedy on his own with his updates.

I want more about his social interactions.

[Keystone Phil]

"I will also start my water consumption tomorrow."

Do you realize how unbelievable it sounds that a "grown" human being is making that statement?

[Keystone Phil]

"I will also start my water consumption tomorrow."

Do you realize how unbelievable it sounds that a "grown" human being is making that statement?

Yes, I know.  It is what it is, though.  At least it sounds better than a grown man saying water is evil.

Oh, are there people that say that or are you just giving yourself a totally unwarranted pat on the back (which does not count as exercise, all things considered)?

[Keystone Phil]

These Update threads have to be the longest and most comprehensive social experiment ever conducted. 

There was a time when I seriously didn't think he was real and that we were the subjects of some sick game.

[Keystone Phil]

Ah, the sight of Our Dear Friend, strolling through the aisles of Walmart, basket tucked under his arm, picking out only the freshest of fruits, vegetables and meats. Sounds like something right out of a Disney movie.

[Keystone Phil]

I just walked down to the apartment laundry facility which is 1/4 mile from my door, put my clothes in the dryer, then walked back.  This is 1/2 mile in about 9-10 minutes.  I'll do another half mile in a couple or three hours.

...

I...

[Keystone Phil]

Maybe the point is that chili shouldn't be part of a diet, pal...