Rasmussen vs. Waxman

[nhmagic]

 vs.

What if???
Run with it...

Barack Obama has used his healthcare program to turn America into a national socialist state - the national army has abandoned the president and he creates his own National Civilian Peace Corp.  After a rule of 16 years, Obama dies of cancer.  This sends the nation into chaos.  Already losing the 2nd American Civil War, the National Civilian Peace Corp negotiates a treaty.  Many states in the union have seceded and formed the New United States of America.  Old America is run by Obama's National Democrat Party. 

The Old & New United States of America:

Sensing his moment has come, Henry Waxman of California announces his candidacy for President of Old America.  He is not without competition.  Oregon governor Stu Rasmussen believes that it is time for a transgender leader in the world.   

190 Electoral Votes Total
California: 55
Connecticut: 7
Delaware: 3
Hawaii: 4
Illinois: 21
Maine: 4
Maryland: 10
Massachusetts:12
Oregon: 7
Rhode Island:3
New York:31
New Jersey:15
Washington: 11
Washington D.C.: 3
Vermont: 3

Here is the Polls Map: Blue - Rasmussen // Red - Waxman // Green - Tossup

Who will win???

[nhmagic]

February 12, 2024 - Henry Waxman announces his candidacy from Mann's Chinese Theater in Hollywood.  He pledges to continue the policies and legacy of Supreme President Barack Obama.  A memorial videotape of Zombie Obama is shown, it reminds the audience of the old republican convention videos of Zombie Reagan.

February 14, 2024 - Stu Rasmussen announces his candidacy with much fanfare.  He also comes under fire from the media as he chooses a dress that is even considered too inappropriate for Old America - children are present.  Not to be undone by Waxman, Rasmussen shows an even longer video of Obama, including a clip when Obama wore jeans on a plane and the CNN anchors got all riled up.  CNN endorses Stu Rasmussen, and Anderson Cooper gushes about how extraordinary it is to be living in a time of change.  Soledad O'Brien does a special called Tranny in America, with a follow up to be called, Tranny in America 2.

March 30, 2024 - The first National Democratic Party Forum in California.  Anderson Cooper moderates.  The first question goes to Stu Rasmussen.  It is an icebreaker.  "I always hate picking out my clothes.  Tell me, what made you pick the red dress?"  "Well, Anderson, my girlfriend picked this out for me."  "Your girlfriend, whoa?  You have a girlfriend?"  "Yes, Anderson, I'm not gay - I just like being a woman."  "Representative Waxman, why didn't you wear a dress this evening"  (The audience laughs)  "Well, I'm happy being a man Anderson, aren't you?"  "You know, there are some days when Ryan...anyways, first topical question.  What will you do to repair relations with our sister nation?  They are calling for Illinois to be absorbed into their union."  Waxman - "Well, I don't subscribe to their wacky idea that the map be pure - New Hampshire has joined them and its in the middle of our territory - we can have a region in the middle of theirs and do just fine"  Rasmussen - "Well, I know one thing about being in the middle.  Its a tough choice.  Boobs or no boobs.  Dress or no dress.  Package or no package.  If I can live in both worlds, so can Illinois"  The panel is non-confrontational and both candidates are well received.

[Scam of God]

LOL.

Conservatism über alles! Death to the f****ts!

... You really hate individualism, don't you?

[nhmagic]

LOL.

Conservatism über alles! Death to the f****ts!

... You really hate individualism, don't you?

Dude this is totally fantasy and for fun. Don't troll.  It has nothing to do about that.

[nhmagic]

April 4th, 2024 - Governor Rasmussen asks for permission to fly through NUSA airspace to reach Illinois.  After a lively conversation with President Palin, permission is granted.  President Palin asks Governor Rasmussen if his opponent had smeared him yet with wardrobe price accusations.  Newspapers report that the meeting was cordial.

April 5th, 2024 - Representative Waxman ventures into Washington state to bring morale to the democrats on his side.  He stages a rally in Olympia and makes a campaign promise to establish better relations with NUSA.  A Rasmussen supporter in the crowd throws cheese at him and this bewilders the audience.

Governor Rasmussen has a campaign rally in Chicago.  Rasmussen promises to create a resources sharing deal with President Palin.  The crowd is pleased.  Governor Rasmussen then attends church with Reverend Wright.  Reverend Wright is unhappy and delivers a sermon about how the GLBTQ community is taking the rights of the black man away. "Do you see this gerbil.  GD America, for letting its people.  Gerbils are coming, they are coming to crawl up in you.  Americahhhh, America's gerbils, are coming home, to roost" Offended that Reverend Wright referenced the "gerbil in *ss" trend during the 80s, Governor Rasmussen slips out quietly with his campaign staff.

[nhmagic]

April 30, 2024 - Video has surfaced from Reverend Wright's "Gerbil Sermon"!  It's Gerbil-mania in OUSA.  Merely curious by the effects of placing a gerbil within the confines of one's body, people are buying them up like mad.  Governor Rasmussen and Representative Waxman condemn this, not only because it proves NUSA right about liberals, but because it's unsanitary and bestial.

There is a significant issue facing the country.  In 2010, Robert Byrd was cryogenically frozen in order to preserve his essence.  After the war, Robert Byrd was granted a lifetime senate position in Maryland, the closest state to his home, West Virginia, which was now part of NUSA.  The Kleagle-Capsule, as detractors called it, in reference to his KKK past, became a national question.  The Waxman faction of the party is worried that the acolytes of Byrd would put him into the primaries.  This would drain significant support from Waxman as Waxman has planned his strategy upon being the experienced standard-bearer, but how much of a standard-bearer could anyone be in the face of the oldest living senator.  Governor Rasmussen does not discuss the issue.

[nhmagic]

May 5, 2009 - President Palin meets with Henry Waxman.  They discuss resource sharing plans.  Palin wants a better deal if she can get it - and doesn't mind selling Rasmussen short if Waxman will give up more resources.  She also wants open border access between the two countries.  Waxman denies that this is a possibility.  They have a heated argument about Illinois and New Jersey.  President Palin believes that each state should have a referendum to see if they want to continue being a part of OUSA.  Polling in each state shows a near stalemate on the issue.  Waxman ends the argument: "You have your damn country and we have ours!"

CNN and MSNBC trash Palin profusely in the nighttime talk shows.  Keith Olbermann has decided to endorse Waxman.  He feels that a deal between Governor Rasmussen and Sarah Palin will cede more territory to NUSA.  He did comment that Governor Rasmussen's dress was very nice the other day.

May 6, 2009 - Governor Rasmussen travels to Maine and gives a speech about civic responsibility and clean coastlines.  She is cornered by an acolyte of Robert Byrd.  Rasmussen waffles on the issue - saying that the family should make the decision for Byrd and that this is a personal choice for them. 

New polls surface in one week.

[nhmagic]

Polls are in!  Governor Rasmussen is closing in upon Representative Waxman's current poll lead in electoral votes (tossups are still up for grabs).  The voters in Illinois and New Jersey were completely turned off by Waxman's nastiness towards NUSA President Sarah Palin.  The polls also show a 50/50 split on the question of whether to join NUSA.  Also, the country was polled on Robert Byrd's cryotube story - the public favors keeping the senator alive in the cryotube, however they do not want him to run for office.

[Ronnie]

At first, I thought you were talking about the pollster. lol

[nhmagic]

June 15 - Sex Scandal!!!!

A video has surfaced showing Governor Rasmussen together with a woman.  In the video, Governor Rasmussen is saying "Ooh baby, don't you know I'm a Governor".  After a little fourplay, the two try on each others' dresses.  The woman in the video says "I've never felt more like a woman in my life and that's all thanks to you Stewie"

Anderson Cooper, clearly upset that the sex in the video was not with a man, denounced Governor Rasmussen as immoral and vile.  Henry Waxman denounced Governor Rasmussen to little effect at a rally, but Rasmussen supporters were present and they began throwing cheese at Waxman, again to his bewilderment.  President Palin was called for a response and she declined to comment on the personal lives of leaders in other countries.

Governor Rasmussen's Televised Speech:

The world that we live in today is a new world, full of big and bulbous opportunities.  When I was younger, I always felt something was missing.  I could feel it near my heart and in my chest.  During this personal journey of discovery, I passed along a clothing store.  I saw a bright red dress - and for the first time my eyes were opened.  I wanted to look and feel like a woman, to feel the cool air flush across my new boobs, to let my hair flower down past my back and to be the bitch I always was.  Never in this time did I ever change my sexuality fully.  I still wanted to be with women and have the plumbing still work, but there's nothing better than looking like a woman and having man-face during intercourse.  The reason why I bring this up is because our country is different than it used to be.  We have different values, different insights, different people.  We should not cling to the things of old and if you are, NUSA will gladly accept you into their country.  Our nation is one that tries new things, makes new things happen and becomes new things.  Therefore, in this day and in this hour let us all let our hair down and live a little.

[The Govanah Jake]

This is pure genus.

[OBD]

What is this...