The Holy Mecha, the holiest of all news sources

[Mechaman]

Greeting fellow Atlasians.  In order to capitalize on the success of human cloning other artists Atlasians making commentary thread we at Mecha have decided that our holy divine pedophiliac deranged cult religion deserved it's own news'commentary thread as a serious supplement to the subjective biases that exist in the Atlasian print world today.

Our first bit of news:

This Just In: Former Midwest Generalissimo Kalwejt revealed to be in league with Satan Klaws in 9/11 plot
After months of denial Midwest legend and Vice President Kalwejt steps forward and admits his guilt in the September 11th, 2001 terror plot that totally didn't happen in Atlasia.  Of course seeing as how this never happened in this timeline nobody cares.

New study reveals that the average Atlasian is not satisfied by Mark Warner's sexual prowess in bed.
According to a new study conducted by the Ricky Ricardo Institute of Retarded Meaningless Dumbshit polls Virginia Democratic Senator and future SexGod of the Universe Mark Warner does not sexually satisfy in bed.  A majority of those surveyed conveyed the general consensus that it was impossible for Mark Warner, a real American, to be able to sexually satisfy a bunch of mid teens-late twenty year old males masquerading as citizens of a fictional country named after a friggin Atlas with enough political machine corruption to make Boss Tweed's Tammany Hall look like an opening act for the Carpenters.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

OK, I'm out of here...

[Mechaman]

New study reveals that trolling is for f****ts.
After many years of examination and study a group of Swiss-Irish-Mozambique Jewish scientists working out of the town of Belthastia, Kagoriya have wrapped up a thorough scientific analysis of the average behavior or internet beings since the beginning of the internet have concluded quite decisively that trolling is indeed for f****ts.  We took a second to ask the f****t community about what they thought of this recent revelation:



Holy Mecha (HM) So is this shocking news to you f****ts?
f****t 1: Not really no.  It is common knowledge that us f****ts are good with gravy, celery, mashed potatoes, and processed peas.  It shouldn't be that shocking to the average person or f****t that we are also good with trolling that is you can't enjoy a good f****t without a bit of troll on the side.

Well there you have it!  f****ts are good with Trolling on the side!

[Mechaman]

Dear beloved readers,

lately there has been a lot of announcements from various posters about running for president.  So much in fact that it seems everybody and their dead dog is coming out of the closet to run for president.  Therefore, in the interests of our corporate sponsors who fund our cocaine habits we are hosting a poll to see who you think will be the next person to declare their presidential bid.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

A pure tie between my mom and Buddy Roemer.

[Mechaman]

Mecha's Page Four Girl of the week!

[AndrewTX]

I'm just going to leave this here.