The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy

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"Governor, the attacks on Romney for not releasing his tax returns are starting to bite."
Nikki Haley tossed her head defiantly, pulling out a Newport cigarette. The man offers her a light.
"Willard will know what to do." Her voice is brittle, uncertain.
The man leans in like a predator, and whispers gently in her ear. She smells of perfume.
"Nikki, the latest Public Policy Polling survey shows Gingrich taking the lead. That's why you should have stayed neutral, like me. I told you."
Nikki Haley takes a drag on her cigarette. "I am the Governor of this state, and I endorsed Romney," she whines, her voice croaking, suddenly she is blinking back tears.
"The people love me, damnit!"
The man suddenly kisses her full on the lips. It is Senator DeMint. They embrace.

O_______________O

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Twilight Sparkle- he could tame any wild animals with his magic ponies

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Sorry for not fully monitoring this. So Naso's girlfriend looks like a female version of himself? Not surprising.

Keystone Phil's female version of himself:

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If you haven't noticed, I refer to the jmfcst in third person...

So does Elmo.  Do you want a medal?

thank you, Ebowed the Grouch

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Context

would the media be all over him and would he have a huge following with fans or would Tim Tebowitz be just another QB?

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Last night I was hanging out in a gay pastor's apartment. Guy makes a great tequila sunrise by the way. I'm personally pretty close to these guys and thus could probably acheive "ordination" as an associate pastor easier than you could. Who knows maybe I'll even be invited to give a sermon as a guest speaker in a year. I've already served as a greeter at their first church gathering, and if I could play anything would probably be in their worship band.

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The February 7th results should be really interesting, especially Nevada's.

Couldn't stop laughing at that one.

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Context

I demand that this thread is renamed 'The Glue Factory'.

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A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx.

"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!"

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.

"How old is this rock?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied, "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian".

"Wrong. It's been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now"

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.

The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.

The amount of lol's radiating from my body right now...

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What the heck is this thing about Casey's hair, or rather the lack thereof?

I think we need someone to do a BRTD type signature:

The individuals pictured below are BALD:

(Mr. Clean) (Michael Jordan) (Bob Casey, Jr.)

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Really?  I was under the impression that (Marxism) was whatever you want it to be.

Karl Marx can do anything you want, baby. Fifty dollars hourly or three hundred all night long.

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RIP

Bobby Brown has also been found dead in his hotel room. The suicide note said, "Two can play at that game."

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Context

No, but people compare me to House.

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There's still time for a late entry into the Republican primary field...

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Hey, it's my Comedy Institute debut!

Also quite possibly one of the best posts I've ever seen.

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Black robe and boxers

Santorum '12

Dammit I was just gonna post that

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We have talked marriage. Seriously. Which would be lovely.

If you get married you really have to share with us which of you 'wears the tiara'.

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Context

"Oh no. CaDan is at the door".

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https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=149523.0

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Indeed. Behind closed doors he swears like a trooper.

Lies, Lies, Lies.  He doesn't even sh**t.  He's pure.  Be gone blasphemer.

Come on, Gramps. It's not like Inks is a Virgin Mary.

Ok fine, just a virgin then

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And here I thought this place was called US Election Atlas, not Soviet Command & Control Atlas.

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I thought Homely's post was funny. The poor graphic design kinda speaks to the fact that Paul LePage is an HP.

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Ron Paul hates the blacks, who are quite fleet of foot.

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So, finally, Xahar, I hope this shows you I'm damn well thinking.

And you failed to convince us again.